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How to Say No Without Guilt: A Simple Framework for Builders and Leaders · Learnings and Missteps by Depth Builder

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's not about doing more, it's about focusing on the right things and building some new skills and talents.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: When it comes to getting stuff done, most people think it's about like going faster or working harder, but it's really about focusing on the things that only you can do.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: But it's like not the easiest thing in the world to just do the things you can do.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this session is for you.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: If you've ever been told you need to learn how to delegate, you should delegate more, hand those things off, or you should just learn to say no.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's not easy.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: And more importantly, we're gonna go over a super fancy way.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: It is the strategically selfish framework that we're gonna be using or going over.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe not the whole thing, but a real small piece so that it's like a nugget that you can start applying and doing like right now, right now.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: If you're new here, I'm Jesse, your selfish servant.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: And my mission is to leave the construction industry better than I found it.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: And I can't do it alone.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: And so this is why I do these live streams and the content and all the stuff that I put out there is so that I could offer up something that will help you free up some space so you could better honor yourself, invest in yourself, so that we can together work to leave the industry better than we found it.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I'm gonna go over three things today.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: The goal is to get through this in less than 30 minutes.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think that's gonna be a problem, but we'll see.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: And so the three things we're gonna go, the three steps are writing it down, circling it, and then focus on what's left.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: That's the super, super simple framework.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: Again, this is about figuring out how to clear stuff off of your calendar.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: The traditional messaging out there is delegate or say no, just stop doing it.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: But it's not that easy, right?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: And so the selfish strategy, there's the firebox.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: We're not gonna go over the whole firebox, we're gonna focus on the two boxes down on the bottom, which are reduce and extinguish.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: These are the things that that, like for real, for real.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: I promise you, if you follow these instructions, you're gonna identify some things that you can actually take action on to remove from your schedule or your responsibilities or however you need to look at it, so that you can focus more time on the important things like yourself.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: And so the first step is this if you got a pen, paper, I don't know if you use notes, it doesn't matter, whatever your form is for like documenting and writing stuff or getting your ideas out of your head, get that.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: If you're watching the replay, press pause.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you want like the whole super awesome template, drop double D in the comments, and you can get the daily domination template, the strategically selfish template.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you get all the templates.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: We're focused on selfish strategy right now.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but you don't need them, they will help you because there's instructions and all that other good stuff.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: So to start, here's what I want you to do: I want you to write down all the things that you got to do today and tomorrow.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: All of the things, right?
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: Like wash the dishes, mow the lawn, whatever it is you gotta do, pick up the kids, take the dog for a walk, wash the truck, go to the grocery store, sleep, reach out to family, stay connected, maybe make a little bit of progress on that side gig you got, that little side project you got, get some workout in, like whatever those things are.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: Write them down.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you want to be like extra, extra brave, write down the next week.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: But keep it simple.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: Like, if you've never done anything like this right now, just think about the next two days because it the idea is so that you can get a rep in and then you can identify something, and then you can run some experiments to clear your calendar, and then you can do it again and look at a bigger time frame, maybe let not just two days, think about the work week or whatever.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Step number one, get the stuff out of your head.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: What are the things that you need to get done today and tomorrow?
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: Write all of those things down.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: And again, if you're like a high achiever and you really, really want to like twist your brain a little bit, but make some pretty big leaps and bounds in terms of um being more effective and focusing on the right things, think about the whole week.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: Now that you've written down those things, right?
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm going super fast, so you're probably not gonna be able to write them all down.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's okay.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: You can come back and watch the replay.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: Write down the stuff you need to get done today and tomorrow.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: Step number two is I want you to go and all of the things that you've written down, I want you to circle the things that only you can do.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I want to be super clear.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: I ain't talking about the things you like to do or the things that you have to do because nobody else does it the way you'll do it.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: I'm talking about like straight up, there is not another human being on the face of the earth that can do the thing.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'll give you an example.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Working out, nobody else can work out for you.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: Going and running some miles, nobody can go and run those miles for you.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: You have to do it, all right?
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: Sleep, getting restful sleep.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody else can do that for you.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Anything that's outside of that, don't circle it, right?
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I know this is gonna make you uncomfortable.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: It makes a lot of people get a little squirrely because they're like, Yeah, but they're not gonna like yeah, yeah, we're gonna get to that.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: Deploy some discipline here.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Write the list down.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: What do you got to do today?
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: What do you got to do tomorrow?
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: And then go back and circle the things that you're the only human being on the face of the earth that can actually do the thing.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: And so the main point here is to get super, super clear about, let me say it differently, is to get like frightfully clear about the things that only you can do.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: And most of the time, these are the things that we neglect, like sleep, exercise, nutrition, relationships, right?
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like visiting mom.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: I don't matter how many times my brothers visit my mom because I don't get no credit if I don't visit mom, right?
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: And so our most important relationships, those things count too, right?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: If you got to go visit somebody, and so those are the things that you can only do, and these are the things that we always seem to deprioritize because we're spending time, energy, and focus on things that somebody or something else can do.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: So, real quick refresher if you just got on, the task at hand is to make a list of all the things that need to get done today and tomorrow.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: After you've made that list, go back and circle all of the things that you are the only human being, software or service that can do those things.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like for real, for real, that's a pretty small list.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but like the number of things that you'll be circling is not gonna be a big giant thing.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: So here's another deal, though, because I know I know how hard it is.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a control freak like me, it's very difficult.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: You're probably circling things that, well, I don't want anybody else to do it, they can't do it like me.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: Wah, wah, wah.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: Your control freakiness is gonna come out, and I understand.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but again, this is an exercise.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I promise, if you follow the instructions, you're going, it's going to like lay the pathway for you to start building the habit or the skill of outsourcing, delegating, optimizing, automating, and just learning how to say no, which are not the easiest things in the world.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: Once you get the reps in, once you get the practice, it becomes super, super powerful.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: But if you've never done it, it is really uncomfortable, it is really intimidating.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: You don't like really know how people are going to respond, what's going to be the outcome if I say no, if I give it to somebody else, they're not going to do it perfect, then I'm going to have to touch it again.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: Like, all of those things are 100% true.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: And this is why I say it's about building the skill, it's about building the muscle.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so the reason I'm telling you to write down the things you need to do today and tomorrow is so that you can pick like low-risk things.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: Meaning, if I was to tell you to write down all your work responsibilities, all the tasks that you have to complete and all the meetings you got to be a part of, those are high-risk things, right?
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: Like in terms of delegating them and outsourcing them or just not doing them anymore because it's your job.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: I just want you to think about all of the responsibilities and commitments that you have to do outside of work.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: So we can find some low-risk things to start building our muscle around delegating, outsourcing, or saying no to.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you're extra ultra brave, write it all down.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: I super, super recommend it.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: Whenever we do the time management for construction workshop, we absolutely write down all of the things that are on your calendar and in your brain.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and then we start identifying or uh filtering through what are the things that only you can do, and what are the things that somebody else could do.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: And also, all you folks out there in the omniverse, if you have a tip, trick, or technique around identifying what to delegate, what to outsource, or what to clear, like how you go about clearing stuff on your calendar, please drop it in the comments.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: Because I promise you, my method ain't the only way to do it, it's just the way that I do it.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: And there's no doubt in my mind that you got massive experience out there that could help somebody else.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: Because a lot of times the way I see things and do things, it's kind of twisted so it doesn't land with everybody.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: So, again, if you've got a cheat sheet, please drop it in the comments.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, if you got a question, if I ain't making sense, ask the question in the comments.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'll it will be super helpful to all the entire community here.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: So, here we go.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: We talked about making your list, writing all the things down for today and tomorrow, circling all the things that you're the only freaking human being, the only service app, like nothing else can accomplish or execute those things.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: Well, we're not gonna worry about them because guess what?
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: You're the only person that can do those things, go freaking do them, go get them done.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: Everything that's left, everything that you did not circle, these are things that we're now gonna run through and identify can we reduce them or can we extinguish them?
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_00: This is the key to being more effective and having deeper impact.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: How do I know?
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's what I did.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: I used to be a super, super busy guy, got a billion things going on.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: I was rushing from meeting to meeting, always kind of distracted, checking my phone, and I, you know, yeah, I was busy, but I wasn't having the impact that I could have because I wasn't present, like serving the person in front of me in front of me to the greatest degree.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: I was also neglecting my sleep, my health.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: I was in bad shape.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: So I had to come up with a method of like, okay, how do I?
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's not about doing more, it's about focusing on the right things and building some new skills and talents.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: So you wrote your list, you circled the things that only you can do.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: Uh now it's time to look at the other things.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: So everything that you circled, fine, leave them there, go do them.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna get them done.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: They will get done because it's only you, maybe, hopefully.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: Now, here's where the magic is: all of the stuff that's on your list of today and tomorrow that you didn't circle.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: Hopefully, you were super, super disciplined and critical about like, yeah, actually, somebody can do it.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know how, like, I don't know the person that's gonna do it, but technically, somebody could, right?
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: Theoretically or hypothetically speaking, another human being could do the thing.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: Fantastic.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: Those are the things we want to look at, and so that stuff that you didn't circle, those things are I want you to look at them through two lenses.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: One, some of them you can reduce, meaning you can make them smaller.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: And then the question becomes, well, how do we make them smaller?
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: Very simple.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it's like magic words, right?
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: But you got to practice it.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: You can optimize them, make a like again, there's things that I do.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I used I'll give you a dumb example, but like for real, for real.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: My routine of like getting up and looking super handsome is I I take a shower, I run through my morning thing, and then I let my hair air dry, which means it takes longer, right?
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: It adds time for me to get ready.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: And now I don't like using a hair dryer.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: Uh I'm sorry, not a hair, like what do you call them?
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_00: Glow dryers, because it's hot and I'm delicate and it burns my scalp, and I don't I don't like that feeling.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the reason I had to like let my hair air dry was because of the hair product that I was using um kind of required dry hair.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: And so if I didn't, like I would do my hair and I'd get ready to go.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: And then my like it would be messy and it didn't work out the way I wanted it to work out.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: And so the way I optimized that is instead, like I had to change hair product, not a big deal.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I cut out 15-20 minutes of letting my hair naturally air dry.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's a goofy example, but I want to put it because it's like for real, for real.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: There are things that you do that can be optimized, right?
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: You can make them less complicated.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: There are all those little extra little things that you do, nobody really cares about them.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: And if now, if you know that they actually really, really care, they ask or demand it be done that way, then do it that way.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: But I promise you, or I'd rather I bet you that a lot of those things you're doing a bunch of extras polishing and shining that nobody gives a damn about.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_00: So look at your list again, it's the uncircled things.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: If there's anything in there that's a little more complex than necessary, that is a candidate.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not saying to do this, I'm just saying it's a candidate for you to optimize the execution of that task to make it easier, make it simpler, because you get time back.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: And here's the thing those are usually tasks that we do a bunch of times, daily, multiple times a day, weekly, whatever.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: And so if you when you optimize it, not only do you get, you know, the 30 seconds, 5, 10, 20 minutes, whatever it is per day, you get like that one time, you get it over and over and over and over again, which gives you energy and focus to put into more impactful and important things, like investing in who you got.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: On the list that you made that you didn't circle, um, these are other things that like you can optimize it, you can automate it.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not a master automator yet.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm working on it.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: I do use um AI stuff, like for when I'm editing videos.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: I can automate the hell out of a lot of things, and there's still a whole bunch more options in terms of automating.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna get into that because it kind of just it's actually it's better if I have a very specific conversation, if you have a particular problem.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_00: And there's a way for us to make that happen.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: Uh hit me up, DM me, or whatever, and you can uh join one of the workshops, and then we can get super, super specific on how to automate the thing that you're dealing with.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: But you can freaking Google it or GPT it, and there are ways to automate a lot of the stuff that we do.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: And then lastly, is delegate.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the issue with optimizing, automating, and delegating is it takes an initial time investment that feels like, well, it's just faster if I do it myself.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: Technically, that is a true statement.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: It is faster if you just do it yourself.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: The problem is you're gonna be handcuffed to doing that stupid thing forever when you could be doing more important, more impactful things, or more importantly, investing in who you got, investing in yourself.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: And so we got to break that, right?
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: And so, in order to break that, we got to put a little bit of a time investment, a little sacrifice up front to optimize, automate, and or delegate the thing.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_00: And once we dealt, once we've done that, we get all our time on the back end.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: So, yes, there is some delayed gratification.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: I understand how difficult that is because I like instant gratification, probably more than most of you on this call right now.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: And if you struggle with the idea of delegation, I used to struggle with it because I had bosses who would bring me a hot bag of poo and say, Hey, I need you to work on this.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's due tomorrow, and I'm delegating to help you get better.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna promise you, that is not delegation.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: That's them waiting to the last damn minute and then finally realizing, oh crap, I need it done.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: Let me give it to somebody else.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_00: Think about delegating from the perspective where this is how this is what helped me kind of get um comfortable and start getting good at it, is I think about it from a perspective of building capabilities in people.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like, yes, I could do it.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it's gonna take me extra time, but if I can hand this responsibility or this task over to somebody else and coach them, teach them how to do it, you know, the way I want or close enough to the way I want it, I'm helping them build a skill that is gonna benefit them in the long term.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: And the fact that I ain't got to do it no more is gonna benefit me as well.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it's gonna take a time investment, but I'm promising you, like for real, for real, it is totally worth it.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_00: So again, you look at your list, you circle the things that you're the only human being that you can do.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: Ignore those.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: What you're focusing on is the things that you didn't list, the things that today and tomorrow, what did which ones did you not circle?
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: And start maybe put a put a little star next to one of them or next to the ones that you like.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I could delegate this to the kids, I could delegate this to my significant other making dinner.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_00: Every time we do those time management workshops, meal prep always comes up.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_00: And there's always somebody in the room that says, you know what?
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna get a meal prep service because my wife and I spend so much time, you know, deciding, figuring out, cooking dinner, da-da-da-da-da.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_00: We're just gonna get it bought and it'll be done.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I've had others where they're like, you know what, once a week, the kid is gonna be responsible for making dinner.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna eat whatever they eat because that gives her or him an hour or two back, right?
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_00: And it helps the kid develop the skill of like feeding them damn selves, which is pretty damn valuable.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I know these are kind of uh like not high, high risk things, but the point is like start at home, start within your like the circle you have the most influence on that has the lowest risk, which would kind of be the daily chores, to start building the habit of delegating, optimizing, or automating.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: Because once you get comfortable with it and you understand what it feels like and kind of how to walk through the paces, then you're gonna be super, super ready to take that practice, right?
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_00: That skill set and apply it in the professional space.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you ain't scared, do it in the profession in your job too.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's the same idea, it's just getting some practice and getting some reps in.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the next thing that uh I want to dive into is extinguish.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: So we talked about the list of things uh that you didn't circle.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: These are things that you can reduce, make them smaller.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: How do we make them smaller?
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: We delegate them out uh uh optimate, optimize them or automate them.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_00: The next bucket is extinguish.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: These are the things that all nobody like somebody else can do, and there is no timeline.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: There's it's not time sensitive, it's not a big like they just they're just things that for whatever reason they're on your list, right?
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: If you do them today, awesome.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: If you do them in a month, like the the sky ain't gonna fall down, and you're and somebody else can do it, right?
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_00: These would like look at those things in terms of the ones that we want to reduce or make smaller, those are they have like a they're time sensitive, there's some level of time sensitivity, meaning let's just say mowing the lawn.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like, no, there's not a due date on them unless you have like an HOA or something.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but eventually, if you don't mow the lawn, that thing's gonna be a jungle, you're gonna be in Jumanji.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be a whole hell of a lot harder to mow it if you wait a month than if you do it every week, right?
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: And so there is some like a time element there for those things that have a time element and somebody else can do, you want to make them smaller.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_00: Now, the things that don't have a time element, like they're not time bound, they're not time sensitive, and another human being or app or software or GPT or whatever could handle it, then we want to just dump that stuff and get rid of it, get it off your plate.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: In terms of like the outsourcing part, which for me, this gonna cost a little bit of money.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: I know, right?
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_00: We like money don't grow on trees, I know because my mom used to tell me that all the dang time.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: But I also know that spending the money to outsource stuff is a well money well, well, well spent.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm also gonna challenge you that you probably are more vigilant about guarding your money than you are guarding your time.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: If somebody comes to you and asks you for 50 bucks, it's probably gonna be very easy for you to say, hell no, I ain't giving you 50 bucks.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: What do you want it for?
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: What are you gonna use it for?
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_00: When are you gonna pay me back?
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like all the things.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody comes up to you and says, Hey, you got 50.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: Minutes, can I bend your ear real quick?
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: You'll give them the time, and that's valuable.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: So, what I'm suggesting is flip that, be more vigilant.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry, yeah, vigilant about your time.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: Don't give it away like you give it away.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: Like be tight with your time the way you're tight with your money for real.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: When it comes to the outsourcing thing, the main point of all of that is it might cost some dollars.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm telling, if you don't have the dollars, I get it.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: Right now, back to let's say mowing the lawn or washing the truck or the car, whatever, you can get the neighbors to do that, right?
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_00: Or the neighbors' kids, you can find somebody to do the thing.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: The thing that I outsource is I mean, I outsource a lot of things now, but like one of the first things I started outsourcing was my groceries because I don't like going to the grocery store.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's a pain in the eye, it drives me crazy.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a good experience for me.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: I get mad for dumb stuff.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and so now I I pay it extra.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what I pay extra, but guess what?
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: That's two to three hours a week that I don't have to go and waste my time in a damn grocery store.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_00: And more importantly, because it's a negative experience for me, like it's not fun, I don't lose unnecessary energy because I outsource the thing.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_00: And so, again, it's not necessarily time sensitive, and there is a service that can handle that.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm gonna get like for real, for real.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_00: You probably do some measure of outsourcing right now that you don't even like you don't think about it that way, but it counts.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I could save the whatever 30, 40 bucks, 20, I don't know what it is for them buying my groceries um and and save that, let's just call it 50 bucks.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but man, those three hours, I there's a lot more I can produce and work through or value that I could deliver instead of going and saving those$50.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like I know it's a little for some of us, it's difficult to look at it that way because$50 is a lot of money.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but, anyways, if it's not time sensitive and there is some like theoretically, another human being could do that damn thing, put a star by that thing on your list and freaking figure out how to outsource it.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: Another thing, uh uh who was it, Gabino in one of uh one of the workshops, the the virtual workshops we did for time management.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: He was like, Hey Jess, I did this thing, it's not on your list.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: I said, Okay, tell me.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_00: He said, I asked for help.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Oh my god, like that's so obvious, but it missed.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: Why?
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: Because I'm not good at asking for help.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_00: So he had some stuff, some response, unplanned responsibilities.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_00: It was kicking his face at work.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_00: He was trying to deal with it, he tried 10 different ways of how to manage it, and it's just never got better.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: And so finally he went and talked to his project manager and was like, hey man, here's the thing that I'm dealing with.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: Da-da-da-da-da-da.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, like, I really don't know what to do.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's just sucking my days, it's taking two hours a day out of my time.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: And his PM was like, bro, don't worry about it.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: I got it, I'll handle that.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: You go focus on the things you're focusing on.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_00: So the point there is there's a lot of things that like uh commitments or responsibilities that we just take on all by ourselves.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody asked, like nobody said, Hey, you need to, you must, you gotta do it.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_00: And and it's it's too much, like it's harder than what we expected, or we were probably may not be the best person to be doing the stupid thing.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: So ask for help.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_00: And people, like for real, people love to help unless you're a jerk.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a jerk, ain't nobody gonna want to help you.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_00: But the likelihood is you're not a jerk, and so if you ask for help, you're giving them the gift of helping, and you could get the thing off of your plate.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_00: Another thing to do is have a conversation about whatever the thing is, right?
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_00: Like I've got so many stories of me doing things or trying to do things that I thought were extremely valuable or that the person really valued, and and it turns out they didn't.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like it was one one I'll give you real quick.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I used to, me and one of my exes, we'd go to breakfast at this one place, and I didn't like the place because it was loud and there was a lot of kids, and it was just I didn't really like the place.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_00: I thought she loved it because she would always order something that was like not on the menu, and so you we would go this every week or every weekend, and then finally I was like, girl, can we go to another place?
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_00: And she's like, Yes, please.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: The only reason I'm going here is because you like it.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, No, I thought it was because you like it.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: So the whole time I thought I was scoring points by doing this thing that I didn't really enjoy doing because I assumed that she was getting great, tremendous value out of it, and then I had the conversation, and guess what?
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_00: She didn't like it either.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: And so the point there is the stuff that's on your list that another human being can do, have a conversation about it.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe a meeting or two that you have to be a part of or that you go to that kind of suck that you're not getting any value out of.
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_00: Have a conversation with your supervisor or the people that are holding the meeting, and like, what's the intent of the meeting?
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_00: What value do you want me to bring?
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_00: What am I supposed to get out of this?
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_00: You might find that you don't even need to be there.
• 28:00
  SPEAKER_00: I've had that experience.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_00: Or you might find, like, oh, that's why I'm there.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_00: Oh crap, let me pick up my game so that you can make it a valuable experience.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: Again, this is about making every making like the energy, the focus that you expel within time more valuable and more impactful.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_00: And then we got Mr.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_00: Daniel Tejeda, he's dropping some some wisdom here.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: He says, One of my goals is to bring lean thinking to the field and help carpenters see beyond the daily routine of just going to work and going home.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: Bro, man, you and I should jump on a call and nerd out because uh you're speaking my love language.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_00: The future of construction belongs to the people willing to learn, adapt, solve problems, and evolve.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_00: Lean starts in the field.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_00: 100%.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: Daniel, I applaud you for your goal.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_00: I you and I are on the same mission, bro.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let's leave this construction industry better than we found it.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_00: And particularly with the men and women out there that are doing the building of construction, there's so much that can be done to make their experience better.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, one of the things that you pointed to is like expanding their time horizon um so that they start planning and understanding things more, thinking about things more critically or looking at things at a more granular level to design the wasteful stuff out of it.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_00: So amen, amen, amen.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_00: Jackie says communication, communication, communication.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_00: And on that note, I want to add communication is not just making mouth noise, it also is listening and receiving, figuring out, like if all I'm doing is talking, which is what I'm doing right now, that don't mean I'm communicating, right?
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_00: If the message is being received, then we're communicating.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so okay, real quick summary.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_00: The idea today is there 95% of the stuff.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'm you know, my math may be a little uh off, but 95% of the stuff that you're doing, you don't have to be doing, like you're not the only human being that can do them, you're choosing to do things that you don't have to do now.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_00: If you're content in your life and you're serving to the degree that you know you can and you're achieving your goals and everything's great, freaking keep doing what you're doing.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're falling behind and you're neglecting sleep and you're neglecting your relationships, and you're not learning and growing at the rate that you want to learn and grow, then my recommendation is consider some of these things.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's some of it, I mean, you ain't got to do all of it, just do some of it, try something.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: And what I'm suggesting right now is look at all the crap that you have going on, all the commitments that you've made.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of us are just overcommitted.
• 30:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a time issue, it's a behavioral issue because we overcommit, we don't really understand how much we've committed to.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_00: And so, a way to really get a focus of that is to do what we talked about on this video.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_00: Make a list.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_00: One just super, super quick review, and I'm gonna jump off of here.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: Make a list of all the things that got to get done today and tomorrow.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to get extra credit, do it for a whole week, like seven days.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I ain't just talking about work, I'm talking about on the clock and off the clock.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_00: Make a list of all the things you got to do.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then I want you to be super, super critical, super, super selfish, and circle the things that you are the only human being technically that can do the thing.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_00: Examples of that are sleep, eat, exercise, connect with other human beings, the people you care about.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_00: There's a whole bunch of other stuff that other people can do.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_00: They can't sleep for you, they can't work out for you, right?
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_00: So make your list of all the things you got to do, circle the things that you're the only living thing that can do those things, which will then leave you a pile of things that you can consider reducing or extinguishing.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: And so go through that list that you didn't circle, that you're not the only human being in the world that can do it, and find one thing that you can run an experiment on.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_00: You'll have to release a little bit of control.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_00: Find one thing that you can outsource or automate or delegate or just stop doing.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's the homework, that's the game.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_00: The point, the reason I want you to just find one thing is because my money is on the fact that you've never done this before.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_00: And so you need to build the muscles of saying no, of delegating, of outsourcing, of optimizing.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_00: All of those are skills that can be built.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_00: My recommendation is pick something that's you know, low-hanging fruit, low risk, commit to running an experiment on it.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_00: And if you want like some you know, pointers or coaching advice on it, hit me up, DM me or whatever.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm happy to like nerd out and maybe give you some guidance or share the dumb stuff that I've done that's caused me pain in the past.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you invest in you, you will better serve the people in front of you.
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_00: And when you're better serving the people in front of you, that means I got another teammate, a co conspirator, uh, to help leave the construction industry better than we found it.