Latest / Finding God at Work / 20: Eating Humble Pie

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20: Eating Humble Pie · Finding God at Work

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(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Hi, I'm Chris.
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This is Finding God at Work.
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Just a reminder that Finding God at Work
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isn't just a podcast, it's also an online
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course.
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Check it out at findinggodatwork.org.
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Our current series is Meaningful Work, Calling, Formation,
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Service, and Love.
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Have you ever been sick and had to
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take medicine that just tasted awful?
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Where you're like, I can't believe I have
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to take this, but then it worked and
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it was better?
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I hope if you've ever gone through this
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experience that it can serve as a kind
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of metaphor for eating humble pie.
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Humble pie does not taste great.
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It's really hard to eat humble pie.
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It's hard to admit that we're wrong.
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It's hard to revise our estimate of ourself
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in a downwards direction.
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Think like, oh, I'm not as fill-in
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-the-blank as I thought I was.
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Competent, fantastic, accomplished, as I thought I was.
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That's the bitter part of humble pie.
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But when you eat humble pie, when you
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humble yourself, to use the biblical language, it's
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really good for your soul.
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Humble pie tastes bitter, but it's so good
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for you.
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It's so good.
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It hits your tummy even and you're like,
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oh, I needed that.
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That's good.
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That's good.
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So I want to talk about humility in
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the workplace as we're talking about formation as
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part of the meaning of our work.
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Part of the meaning of our work is
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that it's a part of how God changes
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our hearts over time.
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It's part of how he crafts our character.
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Again, he's like working in a garage shop.
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You can smell the cut wood and see
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the sawdust and the tools everywhere.
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And the project that God is working on
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is you.
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He's working on you.
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You're his garage shop project.
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And some of how he works on you
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is your work.
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And one way that work can help us
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is in growing in humility.
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Humility is one of the key Christian virtues.
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It's really interesting.
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If you study the history of how people
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thought about good and evil, vice and virtue,
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humility was not considered a virtue in the
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ancient world until Jesus showed up.
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It was Jesus who kind of gave this
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new vision of what it means to be
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good that included humbling yourself.
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And, of course, he's the ultimate example of
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that, that he humbled himself by becoming obedient
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to death, even death on a cross, as
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the Apostle Paul writes in Philippians chapter two.
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So Jesus was humble, but he also gave
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this teaching on humility that to follow him,
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we can also be humble.
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And this transformed people's sense of what humility
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was.
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Rather than something to be avoided, it became
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seen rightly as a virtue.
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So Jesus transformed the way people think about
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this, even beyond the Jesus movement.
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Today, many people who are not necessarily Christians
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will still admire humble people and still aspire
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to be humble.
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Now, that depends.
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Not everybody.
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There's a bumper sticker on the car of
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one of my co-workers at my work
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that says, not aspiring to be humble.
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And I think it's a little bit of
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this cheeky sense of like, I got to
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stand up for myself.
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You know, I got to do stuff that
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matters.
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I'm not aspiring to be humble.
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But for those of us who are following
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Jesus, that's not a good bumper sticker for
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us.
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We are aspiring to be humble, but it's
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really hard to get there.
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Because if you're like me, you suffer from
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this thing that psychologists call the self-serving
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bias.
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So I just got out a page of
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an encyclopedia here, the International Encyclopedia of the
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Social Sciences.
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Here's what it says about this thing called
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the self-serving bias.
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A self-serving bias is any cognitive or
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perceptual process that is distorted by the need
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to maintain and enhance self-esteem.
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Okay, a lot of words there, but any
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cognitive or perceptual process.
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So that means any way that you're thinking
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or any way that you see things.
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So the way you think about something or
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any way that you perceive a certain situation.
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Thinking and seeing.
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That is distorted.
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Okay, so you think wrongly or you see
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wrongly.
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Your vision and your thinking are distorted.
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They're out of whack.
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Like a funhouse mirror.
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By the need, aka our need, to maintain
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and enhance self-esteem.
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We want to think that we're great.
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And this is true socially, right?
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Like, I love to be loved.
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I like to be liked.
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I hate to be hated.
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It's also true in terms of our self
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-concept around our work.
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I want to believe that I'm an amazing
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worker.
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And so in my role at the food
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bank, I'm a fundraiser.
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And I want to think that I'm just
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the best fundraiser there is.
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And that, you know, I'm just hitting it
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out of the park.
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And then I look at my numbers some
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months, and I'm like, well, I'm a good
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fundraiser.
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But, like, I'm not the world's best fundraiser.
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You know, you need something to kind of
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check that bias that you have to inflate
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your own performance.
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Now, different people struggle in different ways.
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Some people struggle from negative self-talk, from
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thinking that they're worse than they actually are.
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And that can have different causes and reasons
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for that.
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But a lot of us, we fall into
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thinking that we're so great.
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We're all that.
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That's definitely my tendency.
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I want to read a little bit more
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of this Encyclopedia article.
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It says, self-serving biases are particularly evident
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when individuals formulate attributions about the causes of
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personal actions, events, and outcomes.
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When explaining positive actions and experiences, their attributions
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emphasize the causal impact of internal dispositional causes.
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But when identifying the causes of negative events,
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they stress external situational factors.
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Okay, again, a lot of words.
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But what this means is, why did you
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succeed or why did you fail?
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So, let's say you had a work project
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and you were helping lead the work project.
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Maybe launching a new software platform or something.
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And it went amazingly well.
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You succeeded.
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Your team succeeded.
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What does the self-serving bias do?
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The self-serving bias means when you're asking
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the question, why did we succeed?
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You're going to tend to answer that by
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looking inside of yourself, right?
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Emphasizing the causal impact of internal dispositional causes.
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So, it's like, we succeeded because we worked
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so hard.
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We succeeded because we're smart.
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We succeeded because we have the best strategy.
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Okay, a few months later, let's say you
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try and launch another software platform and it
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fails.
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It goes miserably.
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Now, you have to explain, why did we
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fail?
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And what do you do?
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Well, you tend to emphasize or to stress
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external situational factors.
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So, you say, well, it was the economic
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situation.
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The economy, we don't have any control over
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the big economic context in which we operate.
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And that shifted.
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And so, that's what affected the software rollout.
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The demand that we thought would be there
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wasn't there.
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Or you could say, you know, also we
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had this change in leadership in the C
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-suite of our company.
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Even though our team is not at that
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level, there was a lot of kind of
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chaos in people's expectations about what might happen
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in the direction of the company overall.
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And so, it wasn't really our team's fault
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the way that affected everything.
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So, you see what happens, right?
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When you succeed, you take credit.
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But when you fail, you blame your circumstances.
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This is one manifestation of the self-serving
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bias.
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And I fall into this all the time.
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I feel like I'm a super competent individual.
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So, I'm not surprised when I succeed.
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And I'm happy to take credit for it.
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But when I fail, I want to evade
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responsibility.
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And so, how do we overcome this self
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-serving bias?
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It's very common for human beings.
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If humility is something that Jesus is leading
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us into, how do we enter into humility
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intentionally?
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How do we eat our humble pie?
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Well, one thing that can be helpful is
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failure itself.
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The experience of failure can be instructive for
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us.
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And I want to go to Deuteronomy chapter
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8 where it talks about success.
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But then also think about how the inverse
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of it can teach us.
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So, Deuteronomy, just by way of review, is
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the final book of the five books of
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the Torah.
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It's when Moses is sort of giving his
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final address to the people of Israel.
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So, he's kind of summarizing a lot of
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things that he said before and giving them
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warnings about what comes next.
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So, what comes next in the story is
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the people are entering into the Promised Land.
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And this comes from Deuteronomy chapter 8 starting
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in verse 11 where he's kind of warning
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them about what to expect in the Promised
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Land.
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Moses says, Take care, lest you forget the
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Lord your God, by not keeping His commandments
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and His rules and His statutes, which I
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command you today.
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Lest when you have eaten and are full
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and have built good houses and live in
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them, and when your herds and flocks multiply
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and your silver and gold is multiplied, and
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all that you have is multiplied, then your
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heart will be lifted up, and you forget
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the Lord your God who brought you out
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of the land of Egypt, out of the
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house of slavery, who led you through the
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great and terrifying wilderness with its fiery serpents
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and scorpions and thirsty ground where there was
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no water, who brought you water out of
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the flinty rock, who fed you in the
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wilderness with manna that your fathers did not
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know, that He might humble you and test
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you to do you good in the end.
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Beware, lest you say in your heart, My
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power and the might of My hand have
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gotten me this wealth.
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You shall remember the Lord your God, for
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it is He who gives you the power
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to get wealth, that He may confirm His
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covenant that He swore to your fathers, as
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it is this day.
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Okay, now you see that embedded in that
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warning, Moses kind of did a little recap
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of all the things God had done for
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the people of Israel.
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He brought them out of Egypt, out of
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the house of slavery.
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He led them through the great and terrifying
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wilderness with its fiery serpents and scorpions.
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He provided for them water, even though it
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was thirsty ground, a dry land with no
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water.
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He provided them with manna, this kind of
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miraculous bread that appeared from heaven to feed
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the people in the wilderness when they couldn't
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farm or do anything like that.
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And why did He do all these things?
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Why did God do all these things?
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This is in verse 16.
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He said that He might humble you and
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test you to do you good in the
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end.
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The people of Israel had to go through
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this long journey where they were not competent.
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They could not produce crops for themselves.
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They could not produce wealth for themselves.
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They were just totally dependent on God's provision
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for them.
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And what did God do?
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He provided for them.
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He provided for them with miracle after miracle,
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the original miracle of deliverance from Egypt in
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the 10 plagues and the parting of the
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Red Sea.
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But then these continued miracles of provision, this
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water from the rock, this manna from heaven,
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God continues to provide.
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Why does He do it?
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To humble them and test them to do
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them good in the end.
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God wants them to realize, oh, God is
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the source of everything that's good for us.
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And He wants to test them to see,
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are you willing to trust me?
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Are you willing to depend on me for
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everything you need?
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Israel, plot spoiler here, they fail that test
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a lot of the time.
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As do we, as do we.
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We so often think, I'm in charge, I'm
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competent, I've got this figured out.
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And we forget that the real source of
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any kind of success or wealth that we
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have is God.
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And this can refer to literal wealth, right?
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And this is verse 18, you shall remember
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the Lord your God, for it is He
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who gives you power to get wealth.
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So literally, you know, whatever's in your bank
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account, that's there by God's grace.
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That's literally true of the money you have.
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But it's also true of other forms of
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success.
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So when a work project really goes well,
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when that software deployment is on track and
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smooth and sales are going and everybody's happy,
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right?
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Who gave you the power to do that?
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That wasn't just you, that was the Lord.
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So in theological context, we might call the
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self-serving bias, the God-forgetting bias, right?
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It's not just that we take credit for
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something internally when we're successful and then blame
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external factors when we fail.
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It's that we forget that even our internal
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stuff that may indeed have contributed to success,
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even that comes by God's grace.
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And as much as we were smart or
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strategic or prepared or competent in any way,
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all of those are also gifts of God's
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grace for us.
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And this is why failure can be so
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instructive.
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What did God do before leading his people
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into the promised land?
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He put them in this situation where they
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couldn't really provide for themselves and he provided
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for them.
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It was almost like a situation of failure
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for the people.
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And it was a situation of failure in
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the sense that it was their hardness of
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heart that led to God needing to do
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that for them.
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But when we face failure at work, again,
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not necessarily like a moral failure of hardness
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of heart, that can be an instructive opportunity
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for us.
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So I want to share an example of
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this in my work life back when I
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was at the mortgage company several years ago.
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I had been working as the executive assistant
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to the president of the company.
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And then he had a project leader resign.
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And so he wanted somebody to take over
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as that project leader.
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And he thought, maybe, Chris, you could do
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this.
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So he came to me.
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It was an area I didn't really have
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any experience.
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It had to do with how to design
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our website to generate leads for our loan
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officers.
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So basically people searching for mortgages online.
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How could we get their information so that
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salespeople could get in touch with them?
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It's like forms on our website and ads
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and things like that.
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I had no experience in this area.
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And Kevin knew that, my boss.
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But Kevin said, you know, Chris, I think
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you could figure it out and I'll be
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there to support you.
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And so I was encouraged by his confidence.
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And again, I feel like I'm a competent
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person.
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So I'm like, I'll do it.
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I'll figure it out.
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I got in there and I could not
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figure it out.
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The data side of it, like trying to
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track all the data in our systems of
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how we were following confidentiality things to honor
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client data.
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Even while we were getting new information on
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new clients.
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But then also how do we track that
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in our system to keep track of like,
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oh, this loan was from one of those
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leads that we generated way back when on
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our website.
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And making sure it tracked through the system.
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That was super confusing for me.
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And I was working with our data team.
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But it took me a long time to
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try and figure that out.
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And I had these Excel spreadsheets that were
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like thousands of rows long.
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And I was like, I don't have any
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background in data.
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Why am I the person trying to figure
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this out?
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And then also just like the inflow, outflow
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of cash.
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We were spending money on these ads, but
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we weren't generating that many leads.
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So we were bleeding money every month.
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And so I was looking at like, you
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know, the monthly budget.
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And every month we had a meeting with
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me and Kevin and the CEO.
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Because it was a CEO-president kind of
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dual company.
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And I present the numbers of how much
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money we had lost that month.
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And, you know, it's not that Kevin and
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the CEO were breathing down my neck.
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But I just felt bad about it.
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I was like, I can't figure out how
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to make this thing work.
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Like, I don't have the right model here.
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And so like we would go and do
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research.
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And Kevin would help me.
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And at no point did Kevin say, Chris,
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you know, you're failing.
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But I was failing.
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At least that was my assessment of myself.
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After four months of this, of kind of
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spinning my wheels, not seeing a way forward,
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I went in and I asked Kevin for
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a demotion.
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And, you know, finding yourself in the position
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to ask for a demotion, that's eating some
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humble pie.
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That was a tough conversation, right?
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I kind of felt embarrassed.
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The humble pie was bitter.
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Kevin tried to talk me out of it.
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He was like, you can figure this out.
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You can hang in there.
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And I was like, no, I can't.
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And I think I made the right call
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in that situation.
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Because then they moved me to a different
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role at the company.
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I did much better in that role.
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I was training, kind of leaning into my
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teaching gifts and what my wheelhouse really is.
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Rather than all the stuff that I had
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no experience with and not very strong intuition
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about how to figure it out.
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But that was still really hard to eat
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that humble pie.
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But, man, was it good once I ate
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it.
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Again, it went down into my tummy and
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it was so sweet and good and strengthened.
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Because it was just the truth.
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It was just acknowledging the truth about what
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I'm good at and what I'm bad at.
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And saying, like, this is not it for
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me.
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I should not be put in charge of
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a website that's generating leads for a mortgage
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company.
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Like, that's not the right fit for Chris
16:30
Easley.
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And there's just an incredible freedom in being
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able to say that without shame.
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Or even with a little bit of shame,
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maybe.
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But then, you know, you get through it.
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And it's okay.
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And that ministered to me.
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And what's the deeper reality there?
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Again, remembering that if the self-serving bias
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is kind of the God-forgetting bias.
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Is this idea that I somehow need to
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be omni-competent.
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I need to be great at everything, right?
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And what I learned through the experience of
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failure is, oh, there's something that I'm not
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great at.
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There's something that I fail at when I
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try to do it.
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And that's a little moment of self-discovery
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about how God made me.
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Like, God did not make me to be
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somebody who can generate tons of website leads.
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As best we can tell.
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And that's okay.
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If I remember, oh, you know, who's the
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one that gives the power for success?
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That's God?
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Okay, so I didn't succeed here.
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Again, this isn't always the right takeaway.
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But it's like, maybe I'm not operating in
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the zone where God would have me operate.
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And it's okay.
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So, God's the one that gives us power
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to produce wealth.
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God's the one that gives us power to
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succeed.
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When we fail, we sometimes see insights about
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ourselves.
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And about what God intends for us to
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do in our work.
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Again, not always.
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Sometimes you fail.
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And maybe it really was external factors.
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Maybe it's not that God wants you to
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do something different.
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It's just like, sometimes you fail.
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And get up and try again.
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But having that humility to say, I don't
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have to be good at everything.
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And having that openness to learn what God
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might have for you specifically.
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That helps form the character of humility in
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you.
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That helps you step into your next work
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project, whatever it is.
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With a sense of, I might not be
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the best at this.
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And in as much as I succeed at
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this, it might be because of God's grace
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working in me.
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And maybe factors beyond my control.
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I don't have to take credit for everything
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that's good.
18:29
And I don't have to blame everything that's
18:31
bad on someone else.
18:31
I can just accept myself as I am.
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With honesty, with humility.
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So, failure can be instructive in helping us
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grow in humility.
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A prayer that I learned.
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I mentioned the author Leanne Payne, kind of
18:46
a deep cut, not very well known in
18:48
our last episode.
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A prayer that I learned from her was,
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Lord, let me never have more success than
18:54
my character can handle.
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And I'm paraphrasing a little bit, but that's
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kind of the way I internalized what she
19:01
wrote in one of her books.
19:02
It's a prayer for humility.
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Lord, let me never have more success than
19:06
my character can handle.
19:08
It's a very un-American prayer in the
19:10
sense that it's not pursuing as much success
19:12
as possible at all times.
19:14
It's rather saying, hmm, am I ready for
19:16
this success?
19:17
Am I humble enough to entertain this success
19:19
in a good way?
19:21
It's a good question to ask.
19:23
So, if you're in a situation where you're
19:25
succeeding, don't indulge in the God-forgetting bias.
19:29
Remember, that's God's grace in you.
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And if you're in a situation where you're
19:32
failing, maybe it's an opportunity to eat some
19:35
really healthy, wholesome, humble pie.
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Lord Jesus, thank you that you are our
19:43
model of humility.
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That you humbled yourself.
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That you're leading us into a path you've
19:49
already tread of seeing the truth about human
19:52
limitation and about who we are and who
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you are.
19:55
Help us to not take credit for those
19:58
things that are really gifts of your grace.
20:00
Help us to have the courage to humble
20:04
ourselves under your mighty hand.
20:06
Jesus, do your work in us as we
20:08
do our work with you.
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Amen.
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Thanks for listening.
20:16
Finding God at Work is a production of
20:17
Mission Central, a ministry based in Aurora, Illinois,
20:20
dedicated to forming Christians for mission in everyday
20:23
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20:24
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20:26
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20:28
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20:35
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20:38
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