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37 | You Can't Conceive of Cary Elwes · You Didn't Ask For This

• 0:00
  Matt: Hey friends, this is just a little cold open to the cold open to let you know that this cold open's got some descriptions of blood and injury that we don't normally discuss on this show, but for this particular occasion, it's warranted.
• 0:18
  Matt: But if you don't like that kind of thing, just skip ahead till you hear the theme music so you're not shocked and awed and grow stout.
• 0:25
  Matt: Anyway, on to the regularly scheduled cold open.
• 0:31
  Matt: I don't know, Eric, do you want to start with a cold open or would you like to start with like a with like a hot open?
• 0:37
  Matt: Oh.
• 0:39
  Eric: Oh my god.
• 0:40
  Eric: I feel like I've never been given the option.
• 0:42
  Eric: I would like I think I could try a steamin' hot open.
• 0:46
  Matt: I just for clarification, when I say a hot open, I mean like I'm gonna I'm gonna come in hot.
• 0:51
  Matt: You come in hot?
• 0:52
  Matt: I'm gonna come in hot.
• 0:54
  Matt: You think are you ready for that?
• 0:55
  Eric: I'm emotionally prepared.
• 0:57
  Matt: Okay.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_08: All right, let's try a hot open.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_08: All right, let's try a hot open for me.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_08: Let's try a fucking hot open.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_08: Eric, I cut off my fingertip.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_08: No, man.
• 1:11
  Eric: Eric.
• 1:11
  Eric: What happened to your fingy?
• 1:14
  Eric: It's gone.
• 1:15
  Eric: Don't, don't, don't tell me that.
• 1:18
  Matt: Don't tell me that.
• 1:19
  Matt: It's gone, Eric.
• 1:21
  Matt: Gaze upon my cast.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: What did you do?
• 1:25
  Matt: Okay, so the situation is there was a cucumber.
• 1:30
  Matt: So Lindsay and I have them.
• 1:32
  Matt: And this is all the detail anyone seems to need.
• 1:35
  Eric: Are you about to tell me a horrifying mandolin story?
• 1:38
  Matt: A mandolin?
• 1:39
  Matt: We have a mandolin.
• 1:41
  Eric: Uh as soon as I heard you I saw your finger, and then you said you're cutting cucumbers, and Lindsay and I have, I was like, Now we, not we, just me.
• 1:53
  Matt: Lindsay, I I'm gonna say thankfully, Lindsay was at uh at school, so she did not have to see the chaos that unfolded when I removed the tip of my right index.
• 2:12
  Matt: How much?
• 2:13
  Matt: Now, I don't want to get too graphic because if people don't want to hear about the graphic details, I don't want to overwhelm them.
• 2:22
  Matt: But I am gonna say how much now.
• 2:24
  Matt: So if you don't like it, you can you can make this hot open even hotter by hitting that 15 second skip real quick.
• 2:31
  Eric: We'll forgive you.
• 2:33
  Matt: About a quarter inch.
• 2:35
  Matt: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:37
  Matt: Yeah, it's just it's clean sliced off.
• 2:40
  Matt: So I do this.
• 2:41
  Matt: Fuck.
• 2:42
  Matt: Yeah.
• 2:42
  Matt: And there's like a hot second where you can, you know, when you get a cut like that where there's like a hot second before it bleeds, where you can just see all it.
• 2:54
  Matt: Yeah, it was it was nasty.
• 2:57
  Matt: And so then, you know, I I have to take care of this.
• 3:03
  Matt: So I I I try to get it to stop bleeding.
• 3:06
  Matt: I hold it above my head for like 20 minutes.
• 3:08
  Matt: It I'm I'm in a lot of pain.
• 3:11
  Matt: And then I'm like, I gotta, I gotta wash this thing out.
• 3:14
  Matt: Like I know the rules here.
• 3:15
  Matt: I can't do it.
• 3:16
  Matt: Eric, I cannot do it.
• 3:18
  Matt: Like, I can't get it to stay under the water.
• 3:20
  Matt: It hurts so much.
• 3:22
  Matt: So I I did this is true.
• 3:24
  Matt: What is about to happen?
• 3:25
  Matt: What I'm about to tell you, I really did do.
• 3:27
  Matt: I took a wad of paper towels, okay?
• 3:31
  Matt: And I shoved it into my mouth like a Civil War soldier.
• 3:36
  Matt: Oh no, getting getting his legs.
• 3:39
  Eric: About to get your fucking leg hacked off.
• 3:42
  Matt: And I took a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and just just dumped it.
• 3:48
  Matt: Just aimed it indiscriminately while sh yelling bloody murder.
• 3:55
  Eric: Oh Matt, how I told you it'd be a hot open.
• 3:58
  Eric: How could you do this to me?
• 4:01
  Eric: You selfish prick.
• 4:03
  Eric: Now how could you do this to me?
• 4:06
  Matt: I do this.
• 4:07
  Matt: I do this.
• 4:08
  Matt: I Eric, I do this to myself an hour and a half before I'm gonna have back injections.
• 4:17
  Matt: I don't want to cancel this appointment.
• 4:19
  Matt: So I so instead I text Lindsay, who sees what I text her during a lecture.
• 4:28
  Matt: So she doesn't respond for a while.
• 4:30
  Matt: She noticed that your spelling is a little off.
• 4:32
  Matt: Ah, very funny.
• 4:33
  Matt: Uh for the yeah, for the first time in my life, I'm taking advantage of the slide text option.
• 4:38
  Matt: Oh, I never ever do that.
• 4:40
  Matt: But I did this time.
• 4:41
  Matt: Yeah, uh, it came in handy when I'm using only my left hand.
• 4:45
  Matt: So, and I very briefly try to go back to work.
• 4:48
  Matt: And my boss asked me to do something, and I go to click.
• 4:51
  Matt: It's my clicker finger.
• 4:53
  Matt: Okay.
• 4:54
  Matt: So I go to click and I just look at my hand for a second and go, I can't, because I do get a band-aid on it.
• 5:00
  Matt: I do get it wrapped up.
• 5:01
  Matt: And I just go like, what am I doing?
• 5:05
  Matt: I can't I can't do this.
• 5:07
  Matt: Broken.
• 5:07
  Matt: I mean, I could really draw out the story by telling you about going to these back injections.
• 5:13
  Eric: Man, we really fucked over whoever hit just plus I'll hit plus 15, it'll be okay.
• 5:18
  Eric: No, no, no.
• 5:19
  Matt: Yeah, they're yeah, they they better they they're gonna skip a couple of times at this point.
• 5:22
  Eric: Yeah.
• 5:23
  Eric: Uh dry heaving the whole time.
• 5:27
  Matt: Okay, so I end up at urgent care with Lindsay.
• 5:30
  Matt: Uh shh, so I go back there.
• 5:33
  Matt: So they at first they're not gonna let Lindsay come back.
• 5:36
  Matt: And I uh, you know, I say that's fine.
• 5:38
  Matt: They're like, are you gonna cry that this is what the person says to me?
• 5:42
  Matt: Not quite that, like, not quite that demeaning, but they do say that to me.
• 5:47
  Matt: And I go, it's definitely a possibility.
• 5:49
  Matt: It's on the table.
• 5:50
  Matt: I I said something like that, and she was like, All right, come on back.
• 5:53
  Matt: So Lindsay comes back.
• 5:55
  Eric: The fuck pay the entertainment day, say something cute.
• 5:58
  Matt: I'm back there for I'm back there for like a long time.
• 6:01
  Matt: And so Lindsay says, I'm glad they brought me back because I would have been, you know, concerned that it was taking so long.
• 6:07
  Matt: They can't again, all right.
• 6:09
  Matt: This is another 15-second skip if you don't want to hear it, folks.
• 6:13
  Matt: It's too shallow to, or it's too shallow to stitch and it's too wide for the glue.
• 6:21
  Matt: So they give me this thing called surgiofoam that like basically acts as a scab until like the until it heals, right?
• 6:30
  Matt: And then I'll push it off when it's done.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_10: Yeah.
• 6:32
  Matt: They gave me an antibiotic.
• 6:33
  Matt: They're like, I'm sure it's fine.
• 6:35
  Matt: I told them about the peroxide.
• 6:37
  Matt: I told them the Civil War soldier bit.
• 6:39
  Matt: Uh wrote them a letter.
• 6:41
  Matt: And then Lindsay starts like shaking her head because of course everybody's laughing.
• 6:45
  Matt: Uh, because you know what I gotta say, I'm a great patient.
• 6:47
  Matt: I'm a great patient.
• 6:48
  Matt: You're a great patient.
• 6:49
  Eric: Oh, I've I have no doubt your bedside manner is dude.
• 6:52
  Matt: I gotta tell you, I am I'm I'm doing a great set in this emergency emergency room.
• 6:59
  Matt: And uh so Lindsay's shaking her head and I said, What?
• 7:01
  Matt: And she goes, she was like, I guess I've never seen you in like a personal personal medical emergency situation, but of course you're just sitting here fucking doing bits.
• 7:15
  Matt: And I say, Well, yeah, what me humor is a coping mechanism?
• 7:20
  Matt: What?
• 7:22
  Matt: It's a solid.
• 7:24
  Matt: I was gonna say it's like a solid 10, but it's more like a solid hour at this point.
• 7:29
  Matt: And so they wrap me up and they're like, Okay, you're good to go.
• 7:32
  Matt: I was like, what if I bleed through this?
• 7:34
  Matt: And she was like, You won't.
• 7:35
  Matt: And then literally, like a like a comic sketch, one drop of blood pops up through the thing, and I'm like, sorry.
• 7:43
  Matt: So they give me like another layer of this foam, and they finally send me on my way.
• 7:48
  Matt: It is since much better, but I have to like keep the thing covered.
• 7:52
  Matt: Uh, no infection, nothing like that.
• 7:54
  Matt: And that's partially due to the fact because that when we got there, when we got there, the doctor said, Wow, this is a really great rap job in reference to my band-aid.
• 8:06
  Matt: And she said this to Lindsay.
• 8:09
  Matt: And I said, Oh, she didn't, she wasn't home.
• 8:13
  Matt: I I did it.
• 8:14
  Matt: And she said, You did this to yourself with while you were bleeding out.
• 8:21
  Matt: And I said, and Eric, I want just want you to know, this is what I said.
• 8:26
  Matt: I said, It's that Eagle Scout training.
• 8:29
  Eric: Oh my god! Fuck.
• 8:33
  Eric: Oh my god.
• 8:34
  Eric: Oh my god.
• 8:48
  Matt: Well, hello everyone, and welcome to You Didn't Ask for This, a podcast answering life's least pressing questions.
• 8:56
  Matt: My name is Matt Shea.
• 8:58
  Matt: My name is Eric Poach.
• 9:01
  Matt: Eric, have you lost any digits?
• 9:04
  Matt: And again, I didn't lose the digit.
• 9:06
  Matt: It's still there.
• 9:07
  Matt: It's just a little uh more angular than it once was.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_10: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_06: You're not gonna you don't wanna uh offer any content warnings right off the gate?
• 9:18
  Eric: Uh I mean the the I think like I've had injuries.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_06: Now you're just staring at your fingers.
• 9:23
  Eric: The worst oh my god, what even are these?
• 9:25
  Eric: I think the worst thing that's ever happened to my fingers is like one time when I was building a set, I took out a screw really fast and I didn't realize how hot it would be, and I picked it up and it like burned the the threads of the screw into my fingertips.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_06: That's nasty.
• 9:40
  Eric: Yeah, not nearly as graphic though.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, uh sorry about that.
• 9:46
  Eric: Uh you're like, yeah, you're like in the in the in the back of the the back of the pub exchanging war stories, like, ah yes, I just saw off my own fucking leg.
• 9:55
  Eric: And I'm over here like I stabbed my toe once.
• 9:59
  Matt: Uh I I I just uh I just felt I owed it to our audience to let them know about my medical updates.
• 10:08
  Eric: That that 127 hours was basically about you.
• 10:16
  Eric: Yes.
• 10:17
  Eric: Yes.
• 10:18
  Eric: Did you now did you have to tell them like that you cut your finger off like with a mandolin?
• 10:23
  Matt: Yeah, and okay, and when I did that, when I said that, this please tell me they were just like, oh, okay.
• 10:30
  Matt: No, when I said that, the nurse said to me, it's not even Thanksgiving.
• 10:36
  Matt: Fucking savage.
• 10:37
  Matt: She was like, We get three or four of these around Thanksgiving.
• 10:41
  Eric: That's fucking wild.
• 10:42
  Eric: I would have that's that would have been all my questions.
• 10:44
  Eric: Like, oh, it's like, how often?
• 10:45
  Eric: What brands?
• 10:46
  Matt: And so I should say I can hear her listening to this podcast and yelling this.
• 10:53
  Matt: So I should say that before before when Lindsay bought the mandolin, apparently, I was briefed on the safety measures in place for it.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Evidently, I did not follow those, uh, that safety briefing.
• 11:15
  Matt: But to be fair, the real question was uh, you know, was I listening or was I listening?
• 11:22
  Matt: You know, yeah.
• 11:24
  Matt: Was I listening but thinking about, you know, Civ Six?
• 11:29
  Matt: Yeah, that's the question you gotta ask yourself if you're my wife.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 11:36
  Matt: All right.
• 11:37
  Matt: Should we answer a question before I get myself in more trouble?
• 11:40
  Eric: Oh God, yes.
• 11:41
  Matt: Absolutely.
• 11:42
  Matt: Um, okay, so this is interesting, Eric.
• 11:45
  Matt: We have a question here from this is from Aaron's famous email.
• 11:50
  Matt: The gold mine.
• 11:51
  Matt: The gold mine, the gift that keeps on giving.
• 11:54
  Matt: Um, and Eric, I think I'm excited about this question because I feel we have an opportunity to do something that we don't normally do, which is provide a factual answer.
• 12:06
  Matt: Holy shit.
• 12:08
  Matt: And for that, Eric, I think this has to call for a you daft investigation.
• 12:18
  Matt: The question in question, Eric, is Is there anything in the Princess Bride that is truly inconceivable?
• 12:29
  Matt: And again, that's from Aaron and his his packed email.
• 12:34
  Matt: So, Eric, um we we have this is how prepared we are for this investigation.
• 12:39
  Matt: We have the screenplay of the Princess Bride up in front of us.
• 12:44
  Matt: And as a result, we can tell you, listeners, and this is a surprise to me.
• 12:48
  Matt: Think you know, listeners and and Eric, even though you know the answer, but listeners, think for just a second in your mind, how many times you think the word inconceivable.
• 13:00
  Eric: How many times do you fucking conceive that is set?
• 13:06
  Matt: How much inconceivable shows up?
• 13:08
  Matt: And I'm willing to bet the number you thought of was higher than five, which is the answer.
• 13:15
  Matt: It is only mentioned five times.
• 13:17
  Matt: Yeah.
• 13:18
  Matt: I would I thought it was much more before I looked this up.
• 13:21
  Matt: And two of them are in the same scene.
• 13:22
  Eric: Yeah, it it's it's it's very conceivable.
• 13:26
  Matt: It's extremely conceivable.
• 13:28
  Matt: So why don't we why don't we do this, Eric?
• 13:30
  Matt: Why don't we go scene by scene and examine the circumstances and see why uh Vizini, who is who says it each time, it's always him.
• 13:39
  Eric: Yeah, yeah.
• 13:39
  Eric: Do an analysis.
• 13:40
  Matt: Do an analysis.
• 13:41
  Matt: So the first one is when they're on the boat going across the dark waters there.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 13:46
  Matt: They're on the way to the cliffs, you know?
• 13:48
  Matt: Yeah.
• 13:49
  Matt: And what we could what you want to do this?
• 13:51
  Matt: Uh uh, do you want to be Vizini or do you want to be Inigo?
• 13:55
  Matt: Ooh.
• 13:56
  Eric: I want to be Inigo.
• 13:58
  Matt: Okay.
• 13:58
  Matt: So I'll start you off with uh, you know, uh a podcast with an actual budget might play you the clip, but instead you get us.
• 14:06
  Matt: No, yeah.
• 14:07
  Matt: Here we go.
• 14:09
  Matt: All right, so I'll read Vizini.
• 14:11
  Matt: You read Inigo.
• 14:12
  Matt: Do you also want to read uh stage directions?
• 14:14
  Matt: God, yes.
• 14:15
  Matt: You know I'm a fool for stage directions.
• 14:18
  Eric: Okay, absolutely.
• 14:20
  Eric: We'll reach the cliffs by dawn.
• 14:22
  Eric: Inigo nods, glancing back.
• 14:24
  Eric: Why are you doing that?
• 14:27
  Eric: Making sure nobody's following.
• 14:29
  Eric: How did Inigo become Russian?
• 14:31
  Eric: I'm sorry.
• 14:32
  Eric: What?
• 14:33
  Eric: I'm exploring the character.
• 14:36
  Matt: Yeah, Mandy Petinkin is exploring a lawsuit.
• 14:39
  Matt: Anyway, give why don't you give me that again?
• 14:41
  Eric: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you, I got you.
• 14:43
  Matt: Making sure nobody's following us.
• 14:46
  Matt: That would be inconceivable.
• 14:50
  unknown: Is that it?
• 14:51
  Matt: And then a couple so then just a couple lines later, I say, stop doing that.
• 14:58
  Matt: We can all relax.
• 15:00
  Matt: It's almost over.
• 15:01
  Matt: You're sure nobody's following us.
• 15:03
  Matt: As I told you, it would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways inconceivable.
• 15:09
  Matt: No one No one in Gilder.
• 15:13
  Matt: Gilder?
• 15:14
  Matt: Gilder.
• 15:14
  Matt: No one in Gilder knows what we've done, and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast.
• 15:19
  Matt: Out of curiosity, why do you ask?
• 15:22
  Eric: No reason.
• 15:22
  Eric: It's only I just happen to look behind us, and something is there.
• 15:26
  Matt: Okay, so here we are.
• 15:28
  Matt: Alright.
• 15:29
  Matt: So the subject in question that uh Vizini is saying is inconceivable is essentially someone is following.
• 15:36
  Eric: That a boat could be following another boat.
• 15:38
  Matt: That a boat could be following another boat.
• 15:41
  Matt: And so he gives the justifications, obviously.
• 15:44
  Matt: I don't know.
• 15:45
  Matt: This seems pretty straightforward that he doesn't mean he doesn't mean inconceivable, he means improbable.
• 15:52
  Matt: Yep.
• 15:53
  Matt: Right?
• 15:54
  Matt: Yeah.
• 15:54
  Matt: No, like that's because it's certainly conceivable that someone could follow us because uh uh Nigo conceived it.
• 16:01
  Eric: Yeah.
• 16:02
  Eric: It is it is as straightforward it I don't know, this is cut and dry.
• 16:07
  Eric: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:08
  Matt: I feel like all of these are gonna be very cut and dry.
• 16:11
  Matt: Well, we'll have to see.
• 16:12
  Matt: We'll have to see.
• 16:13
  Matt: This is an investigation.
• 16:15
  Matt: Uh all right, so let's let's jump to the next one, okay?
• 16:19
  Matt: So now this is just a little a couple minutes later, film time wise.
• 16:23
  Matt: They're on the the cliffs.
• 16:25
  Eric: Cut to the man in black, leaping from his ship to the rope, starting to climb.
• 16:31
  Eric: He's impossibly far behind, but the way he goes, you'd think he didn't know that because he is flying up the rope, hand over hand like lightning.
• 16:39
  Eric: Cut two Vizini and the others.
• 16:42
  Eric: He's climbing the rope and he's gaining on us.
• 16:45
  Eric: Inconceivable.
• 16:46
  Eric: He prods Fezzick, who nods, increases his pace.
• 16:50
  Eric: I don't know again, again.
• 16:54
  Eric: It feels as though perfectly conceivable situation.
• 16:58
  Matt: I mean, he's he's he's looking at it.
• 17:02
  Matt: Yeah, he's watching it happen.
• 17:03
  Matt: I don't know.
• 17:04
  Matt: I'm I'm starting to think that this is just a joke.
• 17:08
  Matt: You know, I think Hold on, hold on.
• 17:10
  Matt: Let's not jump the gun.
• 17:11
  Matt: Let's go right to the next one.
• 17:12
  Eric: Let's try another one.
• 17:13
  Eric: Let's try another one.
• 17:13
  Eric: Let's go right to the next one.
• 17:14
  Eric: Okay, surely this dynamite script.
• 17:17
  Matt: This okay, just a few minutes later.
• 17:19
  Matt: Just a few so go ahead, give it to us again.
• 17:22
  Eric: Cut to the man in black, hanging suspended hundreds of feet in the air, holding to the jagged rocks, desperately trying to cling to life.
• 17:30
  Eric: Cut to Vizini, stunned, turning to the others, looking down.
• 17:35
  Eric: He didn't fall.
• 17:36
  Matt: Inconceivable, it's conceivable, Vizini.
• 17:39
  Matt: Vizini.
• 17:41
  Matt: What it is, it's a it's a refusal to you know what?
• 17:44
  Matt: Let's go.
• 17:44
  Matt: There's only one more.
• 17:45
  Matt: Surely this next one will will be what we need.
• 17:49
  Eric: Yeah, and Matt, I I'd almost be remiss.
• 17:52
  Eric: This is also the line to which Inigo responds, you keep using that word.
• 17:57
  Eric: I do not think it means what you think it means.
• 18:00
  Matt: And it's almost as if I that that that is the whole joke.
• 18:06
  Matt: But now, Eric, if that's the punchline, if the others are a pun if the others are a setup, and that's the punchline, there's still an additional mention.
• 18:17
  Matt: Let's take a look.
• 18:18
  Matt: Let's take a look.
• 18:19
  Matt: Let's investigate.
• 18:20
  Matt: So this is on this is the sword fight.
• 18:22
  Matt: Uh at the end of the sword fight when Wesley defeats uh Inigo.
• 18:26
  Matt: So Eric, uh lead us in.
• 18:28
  Matt: Cut to!
• 18:29
  Eric: The six-fingered sword sent flying from Inigo's grip.
• 18:32
  Eric: He stands helpless only a moment, then he drops to his knees, bows his head, shuts his eyes.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: Kill me quickly.
• 18:39
  Matt: I would as soon destroy a stained glass window as an artist like yourself.
• 18:44
  Matt: However, since I can't have you following me either.
• 18:48
  Eric: And he dunks Inigo's head with his heavy sword handle.
• 18:51
  Eric: Inigo pitches forward unconscious.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_06: Please understand, I hold you in the highest respect.
• 18:57
  Eric: He grabs his scabbard and takes off after the princess, and we cut to close up.
• 19:02
  Eric: Vizini.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_10: INCONCEIL! Vizini, please see me.
• 19:11
  Matt: I think we can close the investigation.
• 19:12
  Eric: I think the investigation's done.
• 19:14
  Eric: Quakest investigation.
• 19:15
  Eric: Five out of five, all perfectly conceivable.
• 19:18
  Matt: The the question in hand was, is there anything in the Princess Bide that is truly inconceivable?
• 19:23
  Matt: And the answer is No.
• 19:30
  Matt: Well, that was an easy question.
• 19:32
  Matt: Uh, you know, that was uh hey, that was pretty cut and dry, right?
• 19:35
  Matt: We're good.
• 19:35
  Matt: We're good.
• 19:36
  Matt: Yeah.
• 19:37
  unknown: Yeah.
• 19:38
  Matt: What?
• 19:38
  Matt: What's just I'm You seem like puzzled.
• 19:42
  Eric: I'm using my I already played the music.
• 19:45
  Eric: I'm using the ancient ability of reading the question a second time.
• 19:49
  Matt: Uh-huh.
• 19:50
  Matt: Uh yeah.
• 19:51
  Matt: Okay.
• 19:51
  Eric: Why?
• 19:52
  Eric: And it's a and I think it's a the question is, is there anything in the Princess Bride that is truly inconceivable?
• 20:00
  Eric: What I think our boy Aaron is asking is if there is anything in the entire movie that is actually inconceivable.
• 20:08
  Eric: Not just like those, like those things.
• 20:11
  Eric: Yeah.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_06: Huh.
• 20:14
  Eric: Huh.
• 20:19
  Matt: Okay, so we're back in it.
• 20:20
  Matt: We're back in it.
• 20:20
  Matt: We're back fucking.
• 20:22
  Matt: Let's think of it.
• 20:23
  Matt: Gang.
• 20:23
  Matt: Okay, so here's what we know.
• 20:24
  Matt: Here are the facts.
• 20:26
  Matt: Everything involving the Zini saying it's inconceivable, just a joke.
• 20:30
  Matt: Totally conceivable.
• 20:31
  Eric: Red herring.
• 20:32
  Matt: What a joke.
• 20:33
  Matt: A plus job, Wallaceon, American track.
• 20:36
  Eric: Wallishawn gift, gift, gift to his country.
• 20:38
  Matt: I have to say, I think everything I mean, if you use the definition of inconceivable, I mean, we're literally watching everything unfold.
• 20:47
  Matt: It's all conceivable.
• 20:48
  Matt: It's all conceivable.
• 20:50
  Matt: But oh, you know what?
• 20:53
  Matt: I think I just thought of something that could be an answer.
• 20:56
  Matt: What do you got?
• 20:57
  Matt: It might be it might be a little too quick.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 21:01
  Matt: But the pain that is inflicted upon Wesley.
• 21:06
  Matt: Oh.
• 21:06
  Matt: We can't we can't know exactly what he's feeling.
• 21:10
  Matt: We can't conceive of.
• 21:13
  Eric: Oh shit.
• 21:15
  Eric: Look, that's good.
• 21:16
  Matt: So there's something.
• 21:17
  Eric: That's it.
• 21:18
  Eric: No, yeah, no, that is a thing.
• 21:19
  Eric: That is totally inconceivable.
• 21:21
  Eric: Only Carrie Ilwis knows the Carrie Ilwis can possibly know the pain of having a year of his life.
• 21:29
  Eric: Only Carrie Ilwis whose last name has scourged my life.
• 21:35
  Eric: What's that?
• 21:36
  Eric: His last name has scourged my life because I have never felt correct saying it.
• 21:41
  Eric: No, I think it's Elwise.
• 21:42
  Eric: Elwise?
• 21:44
  Eric: I think, but I don't know, and no one else does either.
• 21:46
  Eric: We can't conceive of it! We can't conceive of Carrie Elwise.
• 21:51
  Eric: We can't that it I will absolutely count that.
• 21:53
  Eric: It's in The Prince's Bride.
• 21:54
  Eric: His name is showing up in the credits, and I cannot conceive of how to pronounce it.
• 21:58
  Matt: We can't conceive of Ellie.
• 22:00
  Matt: Carrie Elwise.
• 22:01
  Matt: Can't can't conceive of Carrie Elise.
• 22:03
  Matt: Oh man.
• 22:04
  Matt: So with apologies to Carrie Elvis.
• 22:06
  Eric: Yeah, with deepest, deepest respect to Carrie.
• 22:10
  Matt: Apologies.
• 22:12
  Eric: Apologies Chelwiz.
• 22:15
  Eric: His name is inconceivable.
• 22:16
  Eric: Apologies too.
• 22:18
  Eric: It's like a fucking Eldritch.
• 22:19
  Eric: It's the name of an Eldritch God.
• 22:21
  Eric: I just was not meant to be uttered by human human mouth organs.
• 22:25
  Matt: It's not meant to be said.
• 22:27
  Matt: It's not meant to be experienced.
• 22:29
  Matt: It's not meant to be conceived.
• 22:30
  Matt: Fuck.
• 22:31
  Matt: Okay, so we have carry o was we have the pain of getting a uh a year of your life sucked away from you.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 22:40
  Matt: Um what what else?
• 22:42
  Matt: What else is beyond our own spectrum?
• 22:46
  Matt: Um perhaps.
• 22:49
  Matt: No, I was gonna say, perhaps we can't conceive of Inigo's, you know, blood rage that lives inside him, but I think we can.
• 23:00
  Eric: We can we can.
• 23:01
  Matt: I feel like one who has experienced a great loss, I think, can conceive of that.
• 23:07
  Matt: Yeah, there's a deal.
• 23:09
  Eric: I absolutely respect the loss, the pain of like losing a cherished father who made swords.
• 23:17
  Eric: But then there's still like I feel like on the scale of conceivable to unconceivable, that is still pretty conceivable when compared to torture machine that sucks years of your life away built by Christopher Guest.
• 23:29
  Matt: All joking aside, can I tell you a true story, uh true acting story about Manty P.
• 23:35
  Matt: Tinken that you may already know about the Oh, this from your years with him?
• 23:38
  Matt: From my years with yes, my uh tutelage, uh by which I mean watching his TikToks.
• 23:43
  Matt: The uh no, this is the I saw this in an interview a long time ago, but his father died from can I think cancer not too long before like um the shooting of the film.
• 23:55
  Matt: And he he was uh very, very close with his father and had a very hard time dealing with the grief and all this good stuff.
• 24:02
  Matt: And so with the all this good stuff.
• 24:05
  Matt: All this good stuff.
• 24:08
  Matt: Uh so all this, you know, all this uh hoopla.
• 24:13
  Matt: Uh and so he um he used that uh as his motivation for every time he said, My name is Anigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepared to die.
• 24:26
  Matt: He used it as if he was talking to cancer.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: Manny, Manny, Manny, you're listening.
• 24:32
  Eric: Manny, when you're listening, when you're listening to this, Manny.
• 24:35
  Eric: Just know.
• 24:36
  Matt: What?
• 24:37
  Matt: Say it again.
• 24:37
  Eric: Manny.
• 24:38
  Matt: The man's name is Mandy, Petinko.
• 24:40
  Matt: Mandy.
• 24:41
  Matt: Mandy.
• 24:42
  Eric: From from here to known as Manny to me.
• 24:44
  Eric: It's a person.
• 24:44
  Eric: No, no.
• 24:45
  Matt: No, you what you've done is wrong.
• 24:47
  Matt: And quite frankly, disrespectful.
• 24:49
  Matt: And disrespectful to his father's bedroom.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 24:54
  Eric: Manny, I'm sorry.
• 24:56
  Eric: I'm sorry you had to hear that.
• 24:58
  Eric: You know Mandy's gonna listen to this.
• 25:00
  Eric: I'm gonna fucking I'm gonna I'm gonna And you will be embarrassed.
• 25:05
  Eric: But I, however, will be.
• 25:06
  Eric: My embarrassment over the per over over names in this episode right now is inconceivable to anyone.
• 25:12
  Matt: It's okay.
• 25:12
  Matt: It's it's almost it's not quite as bad as when I was listening back to the episode where you continually said Tom Hollands as opposed to Tom Holland.
• 25:21
  Matt: Oh shit.
• 25:23
  Matt: I did do that.
• 25:24
  Matt: And I was like, there's no I didn't catch it.
• 25:26
  Matt: There's no I I I can't correct it.
• 25:29
  Matt: It's too late.
• 25:30
  Matt: I just have to publish it.
• 25:32
  Matt: Anyway, the Princess Bride.
• 25:33
  Eric: Princess Bride, inconceivable things.
• 25:36
  Matt: Pain.
• 25:36
  Matt: Carrie Ooos.
• 25:38
  Matt: Carrie Ooze.
• 25:39
  Matt: Um, I don't know.
• 25:40
  Matt: I'm pretty good.
• 25:41
  Matt: I mean, it's probably inconceivable to picture being held by Andre the Giant.
• 25:47
  Eric: Yeah, I could I really at one point in time you could picture it.
• 25:50
  Eric: You could conceive.
• 25:52
  Eric: Andre the Giant never went, like, was a huge fan of opera, but never went because he was he refused to like he didn't want to like ruin anyone's opera night by sitting in front of them.
• 26:02
  Eric: I didn't know that.
• 26:03
  Eric: Never went a single time.
• 26:05
  Matt: Do you know who drove Andre the Giant to grade school?
• 26:10
  Matt: Who was it, Matt?
• 26:11
  Matt: It was Samuel Beckett.
• 26:13
  Eric: Oh, yeah, it was.
• 26:14
  Eric: I know that because you tell me this fact every five years, and I never get tired of it.
• 26:20
  Matt: And they discussed cricket.
• 26:22
  Matt: Um yes.
• 26:24
  Matt: Uh expect expect a Samuel Beckett fact every uh 37 episodes or so.
• 26:29
  Eric: Yeah, you wrote your fucking thesis on the man.
• 26:31
  Matt: Undergraduate thesis.
• 26:33
  Matt: Undergarried away.
• 26:34
  Matt: Let's not get carried away.
• 26:36
  Matt: I don't know, Eric.
• 26:37
  Matt: I think we've answered the question.
• 26:38
  Matt: I think we've answered it pretty thoroughly.
• 26:40
  Eric: Yeah, yeah.
• 26:41
  Matt: It took two, it took two goes, but can we uh got it?
• 26:44
  Eric: We got that.
• 26:44
  Matt: Can we close the investigation?
• 26:46
  Eric: Oh, absolutely.
• 26:49
  Matt: Here we go.
• 26:49
  Matt: Yeah, uh we did it this time.
• 26:54
  Matt: Oh man, I haven't seen that movie in forever.
• 26:57
  Eric: Bro, it's so good.
• 26:59
  Matt: It's so good to talk about it.
• 27:00
  Eric: It's such a wild Carrie Elwis has such a wild ride.
• 27:05
  Eric: He he does.
• 27:06
  Eric: Like he dies at one point.
• 27:08
  Matt: Yeah, that's right.
• 27:09
  Matt: He yeah, he does like halfway through.
• 27:11
  Eric: And then um Oh, oh, and then um he's he's like resurrected by Miracle Max.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 27:19
  unknown: Wait a minute.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_05: And we're back! So we're back in it.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_05: We're deep in the investigation once again.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_05: You thought it was over.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, so we got Kelly Kelly Kelly's name.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_05: Kelly, let me tell you, I'll tell you right now.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_08: Elguise is Eloise the giant Eloise is the Eloise in the plaza thing.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_05: Callie, Callie Elguist, Callie Elguist died.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_05: He died.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_05: Christ Eloise died.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_05: But he was brought back to life by the power of Billy Crystal.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_05: Power of Billy Crystal! He brings him back.
• 27:55
  Eric: That is inconceivable.
• 27:57
  Eric: I mean, truly is is resurrection not inconceivable.
• 28:01
  Eric: Like they kind of bury the lead in that a man brought a man back from death.
• 28:07
  Matt: From death.
• 28:08
  Matt: And can any of us, unless our name is Lazarus, know what that feels like?
• 28:14
  Matt: No, we can't.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_10: No we can't.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_10: You cannot conceive.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_10: That Wallaceon is inconceivable.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_10: The Elois rests.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_10: The Elvis rest, Your Honor.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_10: All right, let's close the book on.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_10: It's done.
• 28:41
  Matt: Alright, well, that was our our first investigation in quite some time and uh a messy one.
• 28:47
  Matt: But we got there.
• 28:48
  Matt: We got there.
• 28:48
  Matt: We always get our man.
• 28:50
  Matt: It is conceivable that there are other things that are inconceivable.
• 28:52
  Matt: Is there?
• 28:53
  Matt: Is there?
• 28:54
  Matt: Let's not open that candle.
• 28:56
  Eric: I'll fucking die.
• 28:57
  Matt: We can't go in a fourth time.
• 28:58
  Matt: We can't go in a fourth time.
• 28:59
  Matt: No, no.
• 29:00
  Matt: Uh so our next question, Eric.
• 29:02
  Matt: Ooh, I just saw it and it ignited the flame within me again.
• 29:06
  Matt: It's here's the question.
• 29:08
  Matt: I'm just gonna say it.
• 29:09
  Matt: I'm gonna say it.
• 29:10
  Matt: You know what?
• 29:10
  Matt: I can't say it, Eric.
• 29:11
  Matt: You say it to me.
• 29:12
  Eric: Oh, okay.
• 29:12
  Eric: Okay, okay.
• 29:13
  Matt: You say it to me.
• 29:13
  Eric: I can't say it.
• 29:14
  Eric: Okay, no, we we knew we talked about this.
• 29:16
  Eric: We knew this time would come.
• 29:17
  Eric: Like we'd eventually have to deal with something fucking heavy.
• 29:20
  Matt: Yeah, I mean, we we'd we'd have to deal with a a serious question at some point in time.
• 29:26
  Matt: You can't all be funny games.
• 29:27
  Matt: It can't all be funny games.
• 29:28
  Eric: So the question is: what's the difference between a sketch and a skit?
• 29:35
  Matt: Eric, I don't like to think of myself as a pretentious man.
• 29:38
  Matt: That makes one of us.
• 29:43
  Matt: It doesn't matter whether or not that's true.
• 29:45
  Matt: But in this regard, Eric, I have a zero tolerance policy.
• 29:52
  Matt: For there are few things.
• 29:54
  Matt: Coming in hot.
• 29:55
  Matt: There are there are few things.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_08: Look, I'm gathering the air around me to make a point.
• 30:00
  Eric: Hold on.
• 30:00
  Eric: I just I'm gonna start preemptively deleting some social media accounts because you're probably gonna say something off the channel.
• 30:07
  Eric: You're gonna get a boat canceled.
• 30:12
  Matt: Get my blood pressure going.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_10: Which you cannot afford, Mr.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_10: Digit right now.
• 30:18
  Matt: I cannot afford.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_08: It'll burst through this rap.
• 30:22
  Matt: That get me going more than when someone say refers to a a scene on Saturday Night Live as a skit.
• 30:36
  Matt: I lose my shit.
• 30:40
  Matt: Like if you do it and it, you know, we're in public.
• 30:43
  Matt: I have gotten to the point in my life where I am mature enough to just let it wash over me, let the cloud form, let the let the deluge come down and say to myself internally, Matt's gonna be okay.
• 30:58
  Matt: You don't have to correct them.
• 31:00
  Matt: You don't have to explain.
• 31:02
  Matt: You don't have to explain the writing staff of Saturday Night Live.
• 31:08
  Eric: The best part is like, there's no part of me that doubts you are 100% sincere right now.
• 31:14
  Eric: Like I this is like the best, like you, I, I, I know at even as you tell me this, that you die inside anytime someone calls it a skit.
• 31:22
  Matt: And I'm able to come out the other side by saying, Yeah, yeah, sure, I saw it.
• 31:27
  Matt: I saw it, yeah, absolutely.
• 31:29
  Matt: Even though what you just referred to as a skit is a comedy sketch meticulously created by an ensemble of writers, a director and an acting troupe.
• 31:42
  Matt: A skit, Eric.
• 31:44
  Matt: I'm sure we can look up a definition.
• 31:45
  Matt: I've already got Wikipedia up.
• 31:47
  Matt: I haven't referenced it yet.
• 31:48
  Matt: I don't need it because I know in my heart of hearts, a skit is something you do at summer camp.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_10: You do with your with your with your just fucking fucking around with all your little Eagle Scout friends.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_10: Fuck you.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_10: Skits around a campfire.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_10: How dare you think you can sneak in and attack on the Eagle Scouts.
• 32:11
  Eric: Yeah, like a skit.
• 32:13
  Eric: A skit is something you and your idiot buddies thought up in like two seconds.
• 32:18
  Eric: TikTok is a skit.
• 32:20
  Matt: A TikTok is a skit, I would say.
• 32:22
  Matt: I think it's possible for there to be a TikTok sketch.
• 32:24
  Matt: Oh, yeah.
• 32:25
  Matt: But I think for the most part, it's TikTok skits.
• 32:28
  Matt: Now, I mentioned the literal definition, and I did pull up sketch comedy because it does say on the on the top of Wikipedia, donate today, sketch comedians routinely differentiate their work from a skit, maintaining that a skit is a single dramatized joke or a bit.
• 32:49
  Eric: Yep.
• 32:50
  Matt: While a sketch is a comedic exploration of a concept, a character, or situation.
• 32:56
  Matt: Now, I have not personally heard people refer to bits as skits.
• 33:01
  Eric: Oh, well, I think it's a square rectangle.
• 33:03
  Eric: I think bit you know, skits are bits, but not all bits are skits.
• 33:07
  Matt: I I I agree with that.
• 33:09
  Matt: Skits are bits, but not all bits are skits.
• 33:11
  Matt: Exactly.
• 33:12
  Matt: Because there is there is a length involved in a skit.
• 33:16
  Matt: A single joke, I don't think, makes no no does not a skit make.
• 33:22
  Eric: No, I think it's a skit.
• 33:23
  Eric: A skit does work from a premise, but like a bit Well, they both work from premise, but you know what I mean?
• 33:30
  Eric: Like there in a skit, there's a there's a begin there is still a beginning, middle, and end.
• 33:35
  Matt: But it's loose.
• 33:36
  Matt: It's not loose.
• 33:37
  Matt: It's loose, it's small.
• 33:40
  Matt: There might be an arc, but the arc is small.
• 33:43
  Matt: There's no arc de triomphe.
• 33:45
  Matt: No, no, there is no prestige.
• 33:48
  Matt: No, that is that belongs to a sketch.
• 33:50
  Matt: You mean to tell me you are gonna sit here and tell me that Monty Python made skits?
• 33:58
  Matt: Go fuck yourself.
• 33:59
  Matt: Bastards.
• 34:00
  Matt: Go fuck yourself.
• 34:02
  Matt: They made sketches.
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_05: You can go fuck.
• 34:04
  Matt: They can go fuck.
• 34:06
  Matt: And you know what?
• 34:07
  Matt: If this makes me pretentious, fine.
• 34:11
  Matt: I'm fine with it.
• 34:12
  Matt: I was so waiting.
• 34:14
  Eric: If this makes me pretentious, hmm.
• 34:19
  Matt: Then then as I look down my nose at you, I say fine.
• 34:24
  Matt: If you know what?
• 34:26
  Matt: That's just fine if you riff raff choose to say to me that I am pretentious.
• 34:35
  Eric: Someone, someone is listening to this podcast right now going, and this white boy wonders why he's got anxiety.
• 34:43
  Matt: Yeah, I d you know, I d I don't though.
• 34:45
  Matt: I don't, because there are people out here calling skits, sketches, and sketches bits.
• 34:50
  Matt: Call bits skits.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_04: I'm fucking Skits, Skattles, Skittles like fucking sour skittles.
• 35:00
  Matt: Listen, I had on a on an accidental related note, I had sour skittles just the other day.
• 35:06
  Matt: And man, they are I haven't had them in probably a decade, and damn, they are they are potent.
• 35:12
  Eric: Uh bruh, have you had freeze-dried Skittles?
• 35:14
  Eric: Because Sam and I had them recently.
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_05: Excuse me?
• 35:17
  Eric: Oh, Bish, get on, get on Amazon yesterday, order or order a bag of freeze-dried, because what they are, they're freeze-dried Skittles that they then like.
• 35:28
  Eric: I don't know how they make them, but essentially the Skittles pop like popcorn.
• 35:33
  Eric: So like the insides are all exploded out, but the shells are still on there.
• 35:37
  Eric: Like they look like the popcorn version, and you go to eat them, and they're like crunchy, and the flavor is all like concentrated.
• 35:44
  Eric: It is amazing.
• 35:45
  Eric: It's one of the Sam ordered us like a massive sampler of freeze-dried candies.
• 35:49
  Matt: I'm gonna have to get one of these bad boys, and you know, Lindsay's just gonna have to deal with yet another Amazon package I bought on a whim arriving.
• 35:58
  Matt: I just bought Guess Who, you know, the children's games.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: You bought Guess Who?
• 36:04
  Matt: I bought Guess Who because I've been seeing this trend on TikTok of people playing uh subjective guess who.
• 36:10
  Matt: And I want to I want to play it.
• 36:12
  Eric: Like I also want to come over and thrash you at Guess Who.
• 36:16
  Matt: I want we should play Subjective Guess Who.
• 36:18
  Eric: We should play Subjective Guess Who.
• 36:19
  Eric: You know what?
• 36:20
  Matt: Have you seen this on TikTok?
• 36:21
  Matt: Like people saying like I've heard of the concept, but I have not played it.
• 36:24
  Matt: All right, picture picture well here, I'll give you a practice.
• 36:27
  Matt: Picture yourself playing Guess Who or playing Guess Who right now, okay?
• 36:30
  Matt: And and you know, normally the questions are like, is your person in green?
• 36:35
  Matt: Does your person have a hat on or whatever?
• 36:37
  Matt: Okay.
• 36:38
  Matt: This would be questions like Eric.
• 36:40
  SPEAKER_08: Yeah.
• 36:41
  Matt: Uh was your person in DC on January 6th, 2021?
• 36:46
  Eric: Oh, fucking fucking one.
• 36:47
  Eric: Uh how?
• 36:53
  Eric: Oh man.
• 36:54
  Eric: Uh would you describe your person as broke or woke?
• 36:59
  Eric: It's a really good one.
• 37:00
  Eric: I'm gonna use that for sure.
• 37:02
  Eric: Please do.
• 37:03
  Matt: Is your person the kind of person that makes up a name at Starbucks?
• 37:07
  Matt: Ooh.
• 37:09
  Eric: How many MLMs has your person fallen for?
• 37:13
  Eric: Rough number.
• 37:16
  Matt: So I yeah, so I bought this game specifically uh to play Subjective Guess Who.
• 37:22
  Matt: But now that I have it, have you seen all these like because there's other like there's all these ety shops about like custom cards you can get?
• 37:31
  Matt: What?
• 37:31
  Matt: Yeah, because someone figured out you can just they're just cards, you don't you don't have to use the cards, you can just use the trait.
• 37:37
  Matt: Like there, you can play serial killer guest hoops.
• 37:39
  Matt: Oh my god.
• 37:40
  Eric: I I was thinking about that.
• 37:41
  Eric: I was like, I guarantee it's gotta be a thing someone's done.
• 37:44
  Matt: Or like, you know, like you know, Shakespeare characters or something, like whatever you fucking want.
• 37:50
  Matt: You just need the plastic trades.
• 37:51
  Matt: And I actually don't even need them, but I bought them for$10, so fuck you, and fuck you if you think a skit is a sketch.
• 37:58
  Matt: Indeed.
• 37:59
  Matt: You see how I you see how I rocketed us back on topic.
• 38:02
  Eric: Wrapped them up.
• 38:03
  Matt: Alright, so Eric, I mean, am I crazy here?
• 38:07
  Matt: No, you're not crazy.
• 38:08
  Eric: You've just got a you just got a bunch of listeners nodding and going, Yep, theater kid.
• 38:16
  Matt: No, you know what?
• 38:17
  Matt: You know, it's not a theater kid.
• 38:18
  Matt: It's not just a theater kid, because you know what?
• 38:20
  Matt: There's gonna be comedy people out there that's like, fuck you, I'm not in theater.
• 38:24
  Matt: I'm in comedy and I write sketches.
• 38:26
  Matt: You're right.
• 38:27
  Matt: They have a craft too, Eric, is what I'm trying to say.
• 38:31
  Matt: They have an art as well.
• 38:32
  Matt: They do.
• 38:33
  Matt: And it is diminishing to for I think it's diminishing to use the term that I used.
• 38:40
  Matt: Meant demeaning.
• 38:42
  Matt: Eric.
• 38:42
  Matt: Yeah.
• 38:43
  Matt: Don't don't push me.
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_08: Sorry, I'm sorry, but you're red in the face.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_08: You are Jesus.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_08: I am red in the face with righteous rage.
• 38:53
  Matt: But perhaps I'm out of line, you know?
• 38:57
  Eric: Who can say?
• 39:00
  Eric: I dare not speak for fear of retribution.
• 39:04
  Eric: But no, I agree with that.
• 39:05
  Matt: I don't, I don't, I agree with that.
• 39:06
  Matt: I don't I don't fear retribution because I think this is a fact.
• 39:09
  Matt: And we read it on Wikipedia that a skit is referred to a singular joke, or or I think it's fair to say that parts of a sketch are skits.
• 39:21
  Eric: Yes, skits can comprise a sketch.
• 39:25
  Matt: But they they they are not the same as a full-fledged written, uh directed, conceived concept piece that is a comedy sketch.
• 39:39
  SPEAKER_00: A comedy sketch.
• 39:41
  Eric: A comedy sketch.
• 39:46
  Eric: Like when you just say it sexy, a sketch.
• 39:49
  Matt: Yeah.
• 39:49
  Matt: You know, you know, sketch me like one of your French girls.
• 39:52
  Matt: I was just gonna make a Titanic joke.
• 39:54
  Matt: I was just gonna say, I was just gonna say, Jack didn't do a skit.
• 39:59
  Matt: Oh yeah, skit me like one of your French girls.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_08: No, no, no one, no one wants, no one wants a nude skit done.
• 40:09
  Eric: Oh, now let's play this game.
• 40:11
  Eric: All the inappropriate context for the word skit.
• 40:13
  Eric: Um so uh uh based on a description, we've made this skit of the murder.
• 40:20
  Eric: I was I was just gonna do this based on your description.
• 40:24
  Eric: Here's a here's skit.
• 40:26
  Eric: Now we know this might be upsetting, but we need you to is this skit accurate?
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_08: Is is this the man who killed your father?
• 40:35
  Eric: Nobody played with the it's a skit when they were a kid.
• 40:40
  Eric: You mean the the etch a skit?
• 40:44
  Eric: No, it's an etch a skit.
• 40:45
  Eric: It's it's a skit.
• 40:46
  Eric: It's a skit.
• 40:48
  Eric: It was just a it was just like a piece of fiberglass and a ch piece of chalk.
• 40:52
  Eric: But your entire your diatribe reminds me of one of my favorite theater jokes of all time.
• 40:57
  Matt: Oh god, fine.
• 40:59
  Matt: Make fun of me if you must.
• 41:01
  Eric: How many seconds does it take to screw in a light bulb?
• 41:04
  Eric: How many?
• 41:05
  Eric: Uh it's called a lamp.
• 41:09
  Eric: That's your favorite theater joke?
• 41:11
  Eric: It's one of my favorite theater jokes.
• 41:13
  Matt: Can I okay?
• 41:13
  Matt: So, since I just I I just uh went pretty hard, I'll humble myself by uh making an actor joke.
• 41:19
  Matt: It's my favorite actor joke.
• 41:20
  Matt: Okay, please.
• 41:21
  Matt: Are you ready?
• 41:22
  Matt: Yep.
• 41:22
  Matt: Um so uh an actor walks into a bar and says, Hey, can I get some glow tape on this thing?
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_06: Oh man.
• 41:33
  Matt: Because we're dumb.
• 41:34
  Matt: Yeah.
• 41:36
  Matt: Box of fucking rocks.
• 41:38
  Matt: Ah, God.
• 41:39
  Matt: Okay, so um, well, uh I think we answered the question.
• 41:44
  Eric: Yeah, oh, uh I fucking, I dare say.
• 41:47
  Matt: If you are um if you're unclear about it, just rewind a little bit.
• 41:52
  Matt: You know, earlier you fast forwarded, but I can't keep yelling or my bandage will pop off.
• 41:58
  Eric: Yeah, he's gonna I'm watching my friend die in front of my eyes.
• 42:02
  Matt: You know, I'm fine.
• 42:02
  Matt: It's fine.
• 42:03
  Matt: He's fine.
• 42:03
  Matt: He'll be fine.
• 42:04
  Matt: It's it's we're all fine here.
• 42:06
  Matt: Just call it what it is, which is a sketch.
• 42:09
  Matt: And I'll be able to move on, okay?
• 42:12
  Matt: And if that makes you call me uh uh opinionated or you know, pretentious or whatever, if that makes you call me pretentious or opinionated, that's fine because I'll say the same thing I told.
• 42:33
  Matt: I'll say the same thing that I told a girl that I once had a crush on who told me that she says, has anyone ever told you that you're opinionated?
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_08: And I said, you know, I hate that word because everybody's opinionated.
• 42:52
  SPEAKER_08: Uh it's true though.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_08: That's a meaningless word.
• 42:55
  Eric: It doesn't matter.
• 42:55
  Eric: I've got opinions.
• 42:58
  Eric: So you've got to show me someone without opinions.
• 43:01
  Eric: That would be truly inconceivable.
• 43:04
  Matt: And I'll show you a green dog.
• 43:08
  Matt: It didn't work out with her.
• 43:09
  Eric: So uh I was so ready for you to bust out, and I married that guy.
• 43:15
  Eric: I married.
• 43:18
  Matt: No, no.
• 43:18
  Matt: It um not.
• 43:20
  Matt: I guess I blew it.
• 43:21
  Matt: No, you met someone just as opinionated as you are.
• 43:27
  Matt: Yes, no, no, we uh we're equally matched.
• 43:31
  Matt: Yeah.
• 43:31
  Matt: Uh the most beautiful thing.
• 43:33
  Matt: Uh yes, truly uh a perfect union.
• 43:36
  Matt: Um we we do have another question here, but I I don't know though.
• 43:41
  Matt: I don't think we're gonna get to it.
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_08: I don't think oh no, we're approaching the hour mark.
• 43:46
  Matt: I think I think we've done what we've we haven't done it in a little while, but I think we have uh we're at a two question for this episode.
• 43:56
  Matt: So we'll have to hold the questions.
• 43:58
  Matt: Obviously, submit.
• 44:00
  Matt: Yours to us.
• 44:01
  Matt: Um uh and uh the you know all the ways.
• 44:05
  Matt: Uh I'll go over them again.
• 44:06
  Matt: You you can email them to us at udnaskforthis at gmail.com.
• 44:10
  Matt: Uh you can uh submit them on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, the letter U, didn't ask pod, or you can leave us a voicemail on the thought line.
• 44:20
  Matt: Uh and that number is 410-929-5329.
• 44:24
  Matt: But Eric.
• 44:25
  Matt: But Matthew.
• 44:26
  Matt: That's stuff for the that's stuff I say at the end of the episode, but we're not quite there yet, because I think we have time for local legends.
• 44:35
  Matt: Is that the local legend theme song?
• 44:38
  Eric: It was like an exotic growl.
• 44:40
  Matt: We don't really have a theme song for the closing bits, do we?
• 44:43
  Eric: No.
• 44:44
  Matt: No.
• 44:45
  Matt: Should we?
• 44:46
  Eric: Maybe like just like a very shitty, like a like a very I cannot I stress this enough.
• 44:52
  Eric: A very shitty um.
• 44:58
  Matt: Okay, I think that's just duel banjos, but um, we'll take it.
• 45:01
  Matt: Yeah.
• 45:01
  Matt: We'll take it.
• 45:02
  Matt: You know what?
• 45:02
  Matt: Workshop it for the next time.
• 45:03
  Matt: How about that?
• 45:04
  Matt: Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_03: Eric, uh, would you like to uh um rate us a tale about a local legend?
• 45:11
  Eric: I would love to.
• 45:12
  Eric: So this is great.
• 45:17
  Eric: You know it's gonna be good when you have to preface it with this is gonna be great.
• 45:20
  Eric: Yeah, almost like you have to convince yourself of it.
• 45:23
  Eric: Let me tell you of the vegetable lamb of Tartary.
• 45:28
  Eric: Okay.
• 45:29
  Eric: I I this is like my favorite shit on earth is finding the vegetable lamb of Tartary.
• 45:37
  Eric: Okay.
• 45:38
  Eric: So uh Latin Agnes Sythicus or Planta Tataria Baromets.
• 45:45
  Eric: Okay.
• 45:46
  Eric: Is a legendary zoophite of Central Asia once believed to grow sheep as its fruit.
• 45:55
  Eric: Okay.
• 45:56
  Eric: It was believed the sheep was connected to the plant by an umbilical cord and grazed the land around the plant.
• 46:03
  Eric: When all accessible foliage was gone, both the plant and the sheep died.
• 46:07
  Eric: I wish I need I'm gonna like blow this period.
• 46:09
  Eric: I just want you to see it's literally like just it's it's a sheep growing out of growing out of the ground.
• 46:17
  Eric: And it doesn't it doesn't look like a sheep.
• 46:20
  Matt: It looks like a coyote on a pistol.
• 46:22
  Eric: Well, it's old, it's old art.
• 46:23
  Eric: You gotta forget it.
• 46:24
  Eric: Uh characteristics.
• 46:27
  Eric: In Ephraim Chambers Cyclopadia, Agnes Scythecus was described as a kind of zoophyte said to grow in Tartary, resembling the figure and structure of a lamb.
• 46:41
  Eric: It was also called Agnes Vegetabilis, uh-huh, Agnes Tartaricus, and bore the reported endonyms of Boromets, Boromets, or Boranets.
• 46:55
  SPEAKER_10: Interesting.
• 46:57
  Eric: Um, so in his book, The Vegetable Land with Tartary, Henry Lee describes the legendary lamb as believed to be both a true animal and a living plant.
• 47:09
  Eric: Okay.
• 47:10
  Eric: However, he states that some writers believe the lamb to be the fruit of a plant sprouting forward from a melon-like seeds.
• 47:18
  Eric: Others, however, believed the lamb to be a living member of the planet that, once separated from it, would perish.
• 47:25
  Eric: The vegetable lamb was believed to have blood, bones, and flesh like that of a normal lamb.
• 47:30
  Eric: It was connected to the earth by a stem similar to an umbilical cord that propped the lamb up above ground.
• 47:37
  Eric: Uh so yeah, it was basically like leashed to the ground and would walk around eating, eating grass.
• 47:42
  Eric: That, like, I feel like this is a testament to how bored some people can get when they come up with like bitchin' folklore, like they're all sitting around the fire, like, let's come up with a cool ass piece of folklore.
• 47:53
  SPEAKER_10: Yeah.
• 47:54
  SPEAKER_10: We're folk, let's come up with some lore.
• 47:56
  SPEAKER_10: And so it's like folk?
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_10: We're folk?
• 47:59
  Eric: Let's lore, let's lore this shit up, dog.
• 48:03
  Eric: Uh there is uh this is from Wikipedia, donate today.
• 48:08
  Eric: There is references to this animal in poetry.
• 48:11
  Eric: Uh, so I give to you now.
• 48:13
  Eric: This is from Dr.
• 48:15
  Eric: Erasmus Darwin's work, The Botanic Garden, which sounds like a Victorian villain.
• 48:23
  Eric: Um Yes, yes.
• 48:25
  Eric: It sounds like he chases orphans.
• 48:28
  Eric: Yes, like with the express purpose of stealing their life force via tears.
• 48:34
  Eric: Here's his poem.
• 48:35
  Eric: I'm round the pollen the flames of love aspire, and icy bosoms feel the secret fire, cradled in snow and fanned by Arctic air, shines gentle boromets, thy golden hair, rooted in earth each cloven foot descends, and round and round her flexible neck she bends, crops the grey coral moss and hoary time, or laps with rosy tongue the melting rhyme, eyes with mute tenderness her distant dam, and seems to bleat a vegetable lamb.
• 49:13
  Matt: So this lamb just it just it just poops it out like a like like a like a apple.
• 49:19
  Eric: Apparently, according to some legend, it's just it it grows up, it it's it grows up like a watermelon, and uh and there it is.
• 49:28
  Eric: And but then other ones is just a lamb chilling around that can't walk too far away, or else its little umbilical cord snaps and it dies.
• 49:34
  Matt: And so what this this is from where was it again from A like Asia?
• 49:39
  Eric: It yeah, uh uh uh believed to be native to Tartary, which I believe is in A.
• 49:44
  Eric: Let me look that that sounds like such an old time.
• 49:46
  Eric: Let me make sure I'm not saying like a super racist word.
• 49:50
  Eric: Like I you know what I mean?
• 49:52
  Eric: Like it's one of those I'm like, oh yes, it's I do.
• 49:55
  Eric: Let's see.
• 49:56
  Eric: Tartary, uh tartary, but was a blanket term used in Western Europe literature and cartography for the vast part of Asia bounded by the Caspian Sea, the Oral Mountains, the Pacific Ocean, and the northern borders of China, India, and Persia.
• 50:12
  Eric: Okay, so that's back when like they they just referred to an entire fucking continent as like the Far East.
• 50:19
  Matt: Yes, so it's uh so if I'm hearing you correctly, it's something the West made up to describe something we don't know.
• 50:26
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 50:27
  Matt: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
• 50:29
  Matt: That scans.
• 50:29
  Matt: That scans.
• 50:30
  Matt: We're good at that.
• 50:31
  Matt: We're very good at that.
• 50:32
  SPEAKER_10: Oh, we're very good at that.
• 50:34
  Matt: And now so once again, Eric, you have brought us a legend, a beast from from overseas.
• 50:41
  Matt: Uh I bring to you but a man.
• 50:46
  Matt: The deadliest folk beast.
• 50:49
  Matt: Well, is it a man or is it a duck?
• 50:52
  Eric: Oh shit.
• 50:54
  Matt: Eric, today I'm going to present you with uh the local legend from uh also from from uh from our country to us.
• 51:03
  Matt: Yes, uh, but it's from uh our neighbors to the north in Canada.
• 51:07
  Matt: Oh Hamilton, Canada, to be to be exact.
• 51:10
  Matt: We are going to be discussing Lewis Mallard.
• 51:14
  Eric: Lewis Mallard.
• 51:16
  Matt: Yes, Eric, meet Lewis Mallard, the six-foot-tall duck who has been quacking up Hamiltonians with his antics.
• 51:26
  Matt: Uh this is an article from the CBC, uh, written by Chris Hampton.
• 51:32
  Matt: I am going to read some uh excerpts from you said the CBC?
• 51:37
  Matt: The CBC.
• 51:38
  Eric: Okay, for a second I thought you said the C D C.
• 51:40
  Eric: I was like, oh wow, he must be really fucking shit up there.
• 51:43
  Matt: No, no, no, no.
• 51:44
  Matt: Uh so Lewis Mallard is a six-foot-tall duck.
• 51:48
  Matt: He can be spotted three or four times a week roaming Hamilton's lower city.
• 51:53
  Matt: His adventures have garnered a cult following on Instagram.
• 51:57
  Matt: At the beginning of the pandemic, he delivered homemade masks.
• 52:01
  Matt: He's held outdoor art exhibitions around the city's downtown and given away his paintings via a treasure map.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_00: Holy shit.
• 52:12
  Matt: And earlier this month he organized a quote, good old-fashioned duck egg hunt.
• 52:18
  unknown: What the fuck?
• 52:19
  Matt: There are numerous rumors about the bird's identity.
• 52:22
  Matt: Some say Lewis is a woman employed by the city to promote public health.
• 52:26
  Matt: Others say he's a space alien impersonating a duck.
• 52:30
  Matt: At least one of these yarns must have been started by Mallard himself.
• 52:34
  Matt: But beneath the costumeric, Lewis Mallard is the alter ego of a local artist who's found that as a duck, he can be something, a big silly goofball, that as a rather shy and quiet human being, he could never be.
• 52:51
  Matt: The way he sees it, Lewis Mallard saves him from himself.
• 52:57
  Matt: Is that not the words of an artist if ever I've heard one?
• 53:00
  Eric: He's either a trickster god or a serial killer.
• 53:04
  Matt: Lewis came to the artist during a magic mushroom trip.
• 53:09
  Eric: Fuck.
• 53:09
  Eric: Okay, nope, never mind, take it back.
• 53:11
  Eric: He's alright.
• 53:13
  Matt: On a sunny afternoon, lounging near the Rose Garden in Gage Park, hope I said that right, he saw the nearby bandstand as a gigantic eye half submerged, like there was this sleeping giant underground that needed to be woken up.
• 53:32
  Matt: It was his job to free that giant.
• 53:36
  Matt: And when he sketched the character, this cosmic entity assumed an avian shape because the artist's mother had always told him he was an odd duck.
• 53:49
  Eric: Oh, there it is.
• 53:51
  Matt: Mallard built his first costume from paper mache and chicken wire.
• 53:55
  Matt: He debuted the character during the 2019 Supercrawl, which is a multi-day art festival that draws hundreds of thousands to Hamilton's James Street North.
• 54:06
  Matt: People were delighted and confused, he said.
• 54:08
  Matt: And truly, Eric, is there anything we better you can hope for from art than to be delighted and confused?
• 54:16
  Matt: But the biggest thing that happened was totally unexpected.
• 54:19
  Matt: People were looking at me differently.
• 54:21
  Matt: To have someone look at you completely differently than anyone has ever looked at you in your entire life.
• 54:26
  Matt: It was a strange feeling and it was powerful.
• 54:29
  Matt: He felt like he wasn't in his own skin anymore.
• 54:33
  Matt: It's refreshing experience, he says, and one he still looks forward to.
• 54:39
  Matt: Still, the artist says, Lewis is just learning how to fly.
• 54:43
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 54:44
  Matt: He is exploring what he can do with the character.
• 54:47
  Matt: In March, a Lewis Mallard decoy, a bulletin board dressed as Mallard, popped up from across City Hall like a piece of uncommissioned public art.
• 54:58
  Matt: A dark Lewis, with all its colors inverted, has been spotted walking around the city.
• 55:05
  Matt: What the fuck?
• 55:05
  Matt: And in London, Ontario, there's supposedly a man-sized goose by the name of Brian Gosling whose antics aren't terribly dissimilar from Mallard's.
• 55:23
  Matt: Coincidentally, the artist partner attends a school in London.
• 55:27
  Matt: Coincidence.
• 55:29
  Eric: The number of times this article has lost and then instantly regained me.
• 55:35
  Matt: Coming up, Lewis Mallard promises more scavenger hunts, more costumes, and as soon as he can, find the right space.
• 55:44
  Matt: An exhibition.
• 55:45
  Matt: The Duck's only mission is to get weird and have fun.
• 55:48
  Matt: And things are only going to get weirder and more fun.
• 55:55
  Matt: He's gonna murder people.
• 55:57
  Matt: Can I show you Lewis Mallard?
• 55:59
  Eric: Please do.
• 56:00
  Eric: This will be what cinches it for me.
• 56:02
  Eric: It like my judgment.
• 56:04
  Matt: Yes, because I have to tell you, people, whatever you think Lewis Mallard looks like, you are incorrect.
• 56:11
  Matt: And of course, we will put this on our Instagram, but Lewis Mallard, he looks a little like I first.
• 56:20
  Matt: And then I'll describe it for the listeners.
• 56:22
  Matt: So here he is, Eric.
• 56:25
  Matt: He looks like he looks like look at him.
• 56:31
  Matt: He looks like Porygon from Pokemon.
• 56:34
  Eric: He looks like a duck rendered on an N64.
• 56:36
  Matt: Yes, that's he looks like uh like a duck hunt duck brought to life.
• 56:40
  Matt: Okay, but just up top.
• 56:43
  Matt: Then it's just his legs and tights.
• 56:45
  Matt: Yeah, no, this is fine.
• 56:46
  Matt: He's amazing, he's beautiful.
• 56:49
  Matt: All he does is bring joy, and so there's an alternate version of the uh Oh my god.
• 56:55
  Eric: This is okay.
• 56:56
  Eric: Yeah, this is good.
• 56:57
  Matt: This is what pop this is the Lewis Mallard that popped up from City Hall.
• 57:01
  Matt: So here's his Instagram.
• 57:03
  Matt: He is at Lewis underscore mallard on he's got all the stuff, he's got fan art.
• 57:11
  Matt: People make eggs of him apparently.
• 57:13
  Matt: He's wholesome as fuck in the grocery store.
• 57:15
  Matt: Oh, look at wearing a little ghost costume.
• 57:17
  Matt: This is where him wearing a ghost costume following.
• 57:20
  Matt: And so I found this because I started looking up local legends on Reddit.
• 57:25
  Matt: I can't believe I didn't turn to Reddit for this kind of fodder beforehand.
• 57:30
  Matt: And I I saw someone talk about how their daughter got to meet Lewis Mallard in real life and was like over the moon about it.
• 57:40
  Eric: Oh, holy shit.
• 57:41
  Eric: Yeah, no, this is delightful.
• 57:42
  Eric: This this is boldful.
• 57:45
  Eric: I was so terrified that I was going to see some sort of Howard the Duck fucking Cronenberg monstrosity.
• 57:55
  Eric: And then it's just cute little duck.
• 57:57
  Matt: Um, so yeah, that's Lewis Mallard.
• 58:00
  Matt: Uh, he brings me great joy and he brings the good people of Hamilton Gods.
• 58:05
  SPEAKER_10: Godspeed, Lewis Mallard.
• 58:07
  Matt: Godspeed to him indeed.
• 58:09
  Matt: Uh, I like a local legend who's only out here trying to bring joy.
• 58:14
  Matt: Bring in the joy.
• 58:15
  Matt: Because we all could use a little bit of joy.
• 58:17
  Matt: Couldn't we, Eric?
• 58:18
  Matt: We could.
• 58:19
  Matt: We could.
• 58:20
  Matt: We could.
• 58:21
  Matt: And on that note, Eric, I think that'll do it for this episode.
• 58:24
  Eric: Oh, that'll done did it.
• 58:25
  Matt: Of you didn't ask for this.
• 58:27
  Matt: As always, please submit those questions.
• 58:29
  Matt: I already gave you the rundown, but just to hit the highlights, it's you didn't ask for this at gmail.com or at you didn't ask pod.
• 58:38
  Matt: That's the letter you didn't ask pod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
• 58:42
  Matt: And the number for the hotline.
• 58:43
  Matt: I'm sorry, the thought line.
• 58:45
  Eric: The thought line.
• 58:46
  Matt: It's the thought line.
• 58:47
  Eric: It's the thought.
• 58:47
  Eric: That's what I'm saying.
• 58:48
  Matt: The thought line.
• 58:49
  Matt: You did say, I don't think you meant to, but you did say thought.
• 58:52
  Eric: Yeah, thought line.
• 58:54
  Matt: No, there, now you said thought.
• 58:55
  Matt: Now you said thought again.
• 58:56
  Matt: Why am I getting it?
• 58:57
  Matt: I'm getting worked up.
• 58:58
  Matt: It's 410-929-5329.
• 59:02
  Matt: Give us your thoughts.
• 59:04
  Matt: You know, just if you want to just tell us how much you like us, we'll play that.
• 59:07
  Matt: God will play that.
• 59:09
  Matt: Absolutely.
• 59:10
  Matt: Is there any other business that I'm missing, Eric, other than they should do that?
• 59:13
  Matt: They should leave us a review, and they should, for the love of God, recruit a friend.
• 59:16
  Matt: Recruit a friend.
• 59:18
  SPEAKER_10: Get them hooked.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_10: First taste is free.
• 59:21
  Matt: Next time you get that aux cable and somebody was like, oh yeah, lay down the beat.
• 59:26
  Matt: Play this.
• 59:27
  Matt: Just play us.
• 59:28
  Matt: Just just do that.
• 59:29
  Matt: Maybe skip the cold open on this one.
• 59:32
  Matt: But you know, I'm sure that's what they're looking for.
• 59:35
  Matt: Everyone, everyone loves someone who gets the aux cable and plays a podcast.
• 59:41
  Matt: Yeah.
• 59:43
  Matt: Oh man.
• 59:46
  Matt: Shall we wrap this thing up?
• 59:48
  Matt: Let's do it.
• 59:48
  Matt: All right.
• 59:49
  Matt: From all of us here at You Didn't Ask for This.
• 59:51
  Matt: My name's Matt Shay.
• 59:53
  Eric: My name's Eric Poach.
• 59:54
  Matt: And listen, you didn't ask.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_00: But I would do anything for sketches.
• 1:00:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I would do anything for sketches.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_00: I would do anything for sketches.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_00: But I won't do skits.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_00: Skits.
• 1:00:18
  Matt: You're you're gonna stop right there?
• 1:00:20
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, yeah.
• 1:00:20
  SPEAKER_00: You're not gonna go with but I won't do skits.
• 1:00:28
  Eric: Uh oh, we gotta give it like the little the little play out.
• 1:00:30
  Eric: Yeah.
• 1:00:30
  Eric: That's good.
• 1:00:31
  Eric: We can we can splice that in.
• 1:00:34
  Eric: We can splice that in.
• 1:00:36
  Eric: Splice that in fix that in post.
• 1:00:37
  Matt: How do we work the theme music into that?
• 1:00:40
  Eric: And now we're gonna be able to do that.