Latest / Stuff Mom Never Told You / Happy Hour #178: Speaking Out About Public Speaking

Transcript

Happy Hour #178: Speaking Out About Public Speaking · Stuff Mom Never Told You

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Anny and Samantha. Welcome to stuff.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I never told your production I heard you, and welcome
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: at to another edition of Happy Hour. If you choose
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: to drink or whatever you're doing, please do so responsibly.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: Are you sipping on anything, Samantha?
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: So this morning I had to go to an appointment
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: for my physical therapist. Yes, ye, all, it has happened.
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: And so there's a coffee shop near there that I like,
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: a local coffee shop that does now doing Ube latees
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: and I'm a fan. So I've picked up an Ube
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: late iced to ube oat milk laate and I'm now
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: being fancy. Yes, yes, And it's also early morning, so
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: coffee is needed, not early, but earlier than our typical
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: recording done.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Yes, that it is.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'm still on coffee. We are endeavoring to
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: take vacation. So we were recording a lot of stuff
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: and all kinds of hours, and I think it's going
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: to happen. We're in the final stretch.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're done pretty well. Yeah, this is exciting.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: But today I wanted to talk about Okay, first, I'm
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: a shameless plug. Okay, I will be speaking at the
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: PRX Podcast Creator Summit in Atlanta. Oh, and it will
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: be a panel about food. It's gonna be really fun.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: We've already talked about some of the arguments we're going
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: to start about food.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Limon pepper wet or limmon pepper.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: Dry, assuming pie and cake, hot dog being a sandwich.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Oh no, I don't know about that, but just a
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: way to get people engaged.
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: We had a meeting about it yesterday with the other
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: Fabular speakers and the moderator. So it's the panel is
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: called Feeding the Culture, Telling Atlanta's Food Stories. It will
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: be July thirtieth, seven to nine pm is when I'm speaking,
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: and it's at a Plywood.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: Which is where Beer where you used to live West
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: Side Cute. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: It's free. They do ask that you register, but you
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: don't have to. It's more so they can kind of
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: know what the capacity is going to be fun, but yeah,
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: if you are here and interested, they have a bunch
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: of other content too. It's over several days. It's all free.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: A lot of it is geared towards local talent, speaking
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: about how to get into podcasting and some other kind
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: of media stuff. So yeah, come on, if you happen
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: to be around come on down. They're also it's going
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: to be interesting because everyone on the panel has different backgrounds.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: And one of the things we're going to talk about is,
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: for a while, it was believed no food podcast could
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: work because food do such a visual thing or like
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: a taste based thing.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: So how do you deal with that?
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: But all of that being said, plug done. We've talked
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: about this before, Samantha and I.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: I'm nervous.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: I'm all nervous. I've never done one later in the
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: day like that, And I don't know if that's better
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: or worse because now I'll have all day to kind
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: of like be worried about it.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: Right, But if it.
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: Was in the morning, then I wouldn't sleep, So I
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: guess it's whatever.
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: Not done one in the evening, I thought, or afternoon.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Maybe we did one.
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: I think it was in Atlanta that one we went to.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: I think was in the afternoon. Also, you've done.
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: A panel with the dragon Con really late in the evening.
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I might have had a little liquid courage for
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: that one. Yes, Yeah, it was like seven p on
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: a Sunday, So yeah, and for those listening Sundays, the
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: last night of dragon Con. So that's why yes anyway,
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: Uh yeah, I don't know. And we've talked before about
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: how we react to when we get nervous or anxious
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: doing these things. And now sometimes it's like a blackout situation,
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: like you don't remember what just happened. For me, I
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: am rationally not nervous, but the I just have these
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: physical reactions, so I get like really shaky hands, and
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: it's frustrating because the more you think about it, the
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: worse the shake gets. I've had this my entire life.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: It runs in my family. Uh and so everyone thinks
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: you're nervous and then that makes you like more nervous.
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: So that's that's one thing I would I'm worried about.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: But another so I was looking into, you know, women
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: in public speaking, is there what's going on here? What
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: is the internet going to tell me? And no surprise,
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: most of it I found a little annoying. The advice
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: I found kind of patronizing because it was essentially be
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: more like a man in your presentation style, like lower
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: your voice, pitch it like a certain way, very like
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: when conversations come up around vocal fry stuff like that.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: It was a lot of control your voice, stand confidently
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: or sit confidently, which I guess is good advice. I
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: mean it is, But it was stuff like that that
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: I yeah, yeah, okay, but that's what most of what
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: I found was, even from some places. I was kind
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: of surprised too. And there were some articles that dissected
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: why certain women are such good speakers, and they had
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: some good points. I'm not going to reach that before
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: this event, and I don't think that's really what I
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: need to accomplish.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: But they did have some good points.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: It was mostly about like pausing and making sure your
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: point is getting home and like making sure the emotion
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: is connecting or something with your audience. And I think
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: when I'm in my zone, I can do that and
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: I can make people laugh, so.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: It'll be fine. But I did look into how to
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: do this.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: I've done that too, which is how I went to
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: my anti anxiety events.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Yes, right, it does do better.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, I'm always nervous to take a medication I've
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: never taken for so i'd have to test.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: It before I do this. I did find a study.
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: There are a couple studies on this, actually, but I
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: found a recent one called do Women Shy away from
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: Public Speaking?
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: A field experiment?
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: By Maria Da Paula Rosetta, Lombardo Valeria Pupo, and Vincenzo Scopa.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: And it was a pretty detailed study, so if you
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: want to check it out, we could come back and
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: probably do a whole episode on women in public speaking.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: But here were some of their main takeaways that I
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: thought were interesting. Women are more willing to present face
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: to face, but they are considerably less likely to give
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: a public presentation. Female aversion to public speaking does not
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: depend on differences inability, risk aversion, self confidence, and self esteem,
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: which is the popularly held belief. The aversion to public
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: speaking greatly reduces for daughters of working women, which seems
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: to suggest that if they see.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Women doing it, it's not as bad.
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: But it was really interesting because it also found that
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: the men in the study showed no difference between face
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: to face in public and it not surprisingly to me
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: said that women, a lot of women were really worried
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: about public scrutiny around their appearance or how they speak,
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: all these things we have been taught you will be
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: judged for right, so that makes sense. That wasn't a surprise,
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: but it was interesting to have this whole kind of
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: scientific study of it, and we've also talked about that too,
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: because I gained a lot of weight during the pandemic,
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: and so I'm more nervous about how people perceive me
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: in these public spaces, which is not I have been
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: taught that, but also I can recognize that that's not
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: really what's happening usually. So I just got to get
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: out of my head and talk about food and start
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: some food fights.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: That's that's it. Perfect.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: They're gonna, yeah, well they're gonna there's food and drinks
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: after I forgot to mention, so I think there are
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: going to be wings and pizza, which are two of
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: the topics.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: Well, I don't know. I don't know, but.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: It should be it should be fun and I would
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: love to meet anyone. A co host Lauren Vogelbaum of
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: Saver the other show I do, which I should have mentioned,
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: is why I got asked talk about the food on
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: this panel will be there a couple of other cool,
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: really cool people, So come.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: On down and you know I will.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: Maybe your presence will help with my nerves, because you've
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: all been so kind and ask great questions when we
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: have done this in the past, as s Minty, So yes,
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: all right. Well, I hope to see some of you there,
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: but in the meantime, listeners, we hope all of you
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: are well and perhaps you're getting to take some kind
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: of vacation. If you have any thoughts or tips on
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: public speaking, please let us know. You can email us
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: a hello at Stuffhenever Told You dot com. You can
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: find us on Blue Sky and also podcasts or on
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: Instagram and TikTok at stuff I Never Told You for
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: us on YouTube, and we have a book.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: You can get wherever you get your books.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: Thanks as always too, our super disguistine, our executive puer
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: my antik tribber Joey, thank you and thanks to you
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: for listening. Stuff When Never Told You production by Heart Radio.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: More podcasts from my heart Radio. You can check out
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: the heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: to your favorite shows.