Latest / Three Damned Dudes / Episode 20 - #THOTSandPRAYERS

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Episode 20 - #THOTSandPRAYERS · Three Damned Dudes

• 0:13
  The Three Damn Dudes podcast is brought to you by Rifle and
• 0:16
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• 0:19
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  But it's not just firearms. It's also automotive parts, game
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  oven. Their goal is to make you say
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  wow when it comes out of the case.
• 0:47
  All right, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to episode 20 of the
• 0:53
  Three Damn Dudes podcast. We're happy you're here.
• 0:57
  Well, Gavin's happy you're here, Jimmy's happy you're here, and
• 1:02
  Jimmy didn't even fucking show up today.
• 1:04
  Yeah, you may be noticing that we are down a damn dude.
• 1:10
  And it's not the damn dude you think.
• 1:15
  The That was going to be a funny story if Jimmy loves to tell it.
• 1:21
  Yeah, if we ever see Jimmy again, I have been told that the
• 1:25
  story is almost to die for. Too soon and let's see what
• 1:34
  happens. That joke might not age well.
• 1:38
  Yeah, maybe not. Might not be Gavin's last stand
• 1:42
  and maybe Jimmy's last stand. He left one show and I didn't
• 1:50
  leave one show. He, yeah, he left one show to
• 1:54
  join our show just to die before episode 20.
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  Fuck. Just to leave another show.
• 2:06
  Well, I just laughed out of fart.
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  This is what I'm saying. It's like the exact same fucking
• 2:13
  situation when Kyle left. We came as Romans.
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  Wow, that still hurts. I know.
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  Or when Casey left Hawthorne Heights, Erwin, Mitch left
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  suicide. Silence.
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  You want me to keep going? It's going to actually hurt here
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  pretty soon. I I was going to say I've I've
• 2:36
  got one that would probably hurt.
• 2:39
  What do you got? Like Winchester left Lincoln
• 2:42
  Park. Damn.
• 2:47
  Oh, now I'm sad. Well this is about episode 20 of
• 2:50
  the 3D News Podcast. Thanks for showing up.
• 2:54
  God damn dude. Yeah, that was my bad.
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  I started this on that. You know, there's a line in
• 3:02
  there somewhere. And apparently I'm not saying
• 3:05
  Chester is the line, but he, he is on the wrong side of that
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  line. Yeah, but I don't know where the
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  line is. Every once in a while you gotta
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  cross the line to make sure that you still have it.
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  So yeah. Just make sure it's still there,
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  like how Barrett and Ridley like to fucking do shit way too fast.
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  And make sure gravity's still turned on.
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  Yeah, I get it. So what you find, folks?
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  Go ahead. And it's just like I was telling
• 3:38
  you earlier, like when I saw that video Bear playing with the
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  chair and you're like, don't do that, you're gonna get hurt.
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  And he immediately falls and hits the chair.
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  I was like, Yep. Yeah.
• 3:53
  Laughed way too hard at that. It's funny because he's, he just
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  turned a year old and he tries to like dance to things, but he
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  doesn't dance. He basically just toddler
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  twerks. And that's like in that series
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  of videos that Jenna put up, it's him dancing, but he's got
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  his foot up on the chair. So he's like leg in the air
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  twerking. And I'm like, no, no buddy
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  buddy. We 2 step in this household.
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  And This is why parents need to be involved in their children's
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  lives. All this access to fucking
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  social media and the Internet. You got to monitor what your
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  kids doing apparently. At a year old, I mean.
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  He's not allowed to listen to to fucking Taylor Swift anymore.
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  That's not even who I was thinking of, but I.
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  Oh. My God.
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  We have our third Damn dude. Ladies and gentlemen, live from
• 4:58
  an undisclosed, soon to be disclosed location.
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  Jimmy is here. Possibly not for long.
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  Oh my God dude, the 2. It's not even that noticeable.
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  It's fine. It'll buff, yeah.
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  It'll buff right the fuck out. It'll buff yeah.
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  What's happening, boys? What's your recaps?
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  No, we haven't even gotten there yet.
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  We were talking shit about how you weren't here and made a
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  bunch of jokes about yeah, you'll, you'll see when this
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  goes live on Friday. It'll it'll be a fun little
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  teaser for you. Gotcha, gotcha.
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  So I will. Well, actually, what's up,
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  Jimmy? What are you drinking over?
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  There they didn't. Room service kind of sucks here.
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  I don't have anything to drink yet.
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  Nobody's offered me any, any bourbon or anything.
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  Just drinking spitting blood, huh?
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  Yeah, Gavin. What are you drinking, bud?
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  Good old Mother Light. Hell yeah.
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  Yep. Well, Jimmy, is this smell
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  familiar? You want to sniff.
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  For blood. Yeah, well, I'm not drinking
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  blood, I'm drinking Blanton's because I'm a classy bitch.
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  So yeah. Cheers to everybody but Jimmy
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  because he didn't bring a drink to the fucking show.
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  I I feel like we should be cheersing Jimmy though.
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  Cheers, Jimmy. Cheers, you don't got so many
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  stickers on me and stuff right now.
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  Look. At this.
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  Cheers buddy. Crazy.
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  All right into the recaps, so. I feel like we should start with
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  Jimmy real quick because we don't know how long he's going
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  to. Be there for Jimmy, why don't
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  you? Why don't you tell us where you
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  are and why you're there and what the fuck happened?
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  Well I'm currently calling in from the hospital.
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  I I had I had several weekly recaps in the docs, but I do
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  have a new one for you guys. Oh, sorry.
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  Brad, back, please. You will.
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  Hello. All right, Jimmy's still alive.
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  I will go until Jimmy comes back.
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  So my 3 year old daughter Ridley has learned how to work the
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  Alexa that we have in the kitchen.
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  Yeah. So she'll stand.
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  Uh huh. Not not like buying.
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  She doesn't know. She doesn't understand that she
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  can buy things. I've.
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  Been thinking of that. Yeah, so she's standing in her
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  stool at the end of the kitchen island and goes.
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  Alexa. Play Old MacDonald and so
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  there's like a there's like an 8 count before the words start and
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  she'll sing like old McDonald had a farm E i.e.
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  I/O and for whatever reason in her had the first animal on that
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  song that she's listened to no less than 17,000,000 times is
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  pig. That's not the first animal.
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  I was going to say I haven't listened to that in a while, but
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  that's not how I remember it. So she goes and on that farm he
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  had a pig, and here's the song say sheep.
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  And she goes, ah, darn, Alexa started over.
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  No. 3 fucking times in a row fucked up the same part of the
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  song. Time for she finally got it and
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  then fucked up on what sound a sheep makes.
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  What? Yeah, she's trying, man.
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  She's she's fucking trying. Please tell me there's some like
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  parental controls or some shit that you can.
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  Turn. I'm.
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  I'm sure there is. Yeah, Jenna's the one that she's
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  got the app on her phone and all that shit.
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  No. Y'all might need to figure that
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  out soon rather than them later. She will stand there and go
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  Alexa play Bill Murray, but it it doesn't, it doesn't do it.
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  It goes to it goes to actual Bill Murray singing the bare
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  necessities from The Jungle Book.
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  And then she'll get angry because it's not hog cranking
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  music. It's a fucking Jungle Book.
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  That's still a banger though. Like.
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  I mean, you're not wrong, but listen, there's a lot of songs
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  that are bangers, but just because it's a banger doesn't
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  mean it's the banger I'm in the mood for.
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  That's fair. And when that child wants Bill
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  Murray, she wants Bill Murray. Raising the proper little hog
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  cranker. Don't.
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  Nope, Nope, no, Nope. There's a line somewhere.
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  I think we found one of them. Well, here's the thing.
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  You got two kids right now. One of them is going to be a hog
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  cranker. That's just.
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  It's just. Like at least one of them.
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  Yeah, that's biology. Yeah.
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  He's going to discover that thing after puberty.
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  And he's never going to undiscover it.
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  Yep, yeah, you have to go into his room with a fucking hazmat
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  suit. Yeah, I'm going to ban black
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  lights when he turns 11. He's going to have to do his own
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  fucking laundry too. I'm not touching this shit.
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  Yeah, yeah. I don't know.
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  It's entirely accurate. We were.
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  We were young boys at one point. Yeah.
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  How fucking gross they can be. Yeah, which you know that would
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  that would be a funny, not a fun topic, but a funny topic.
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  And depending on if Jimmy comes back, I'm going to, I'm going to
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  hit you with a rapid fire set of questions, but we'll save that
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  for later. Yeah.
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  So Ridley and Alexa, it's it's fucking hilarious every time my
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  nose itches. Fucking bullshit.
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  So I got, I got a bunch of fucking music stuff when I was
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  in Michigan. Oh yeah, yeah.
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  So I got a 410 cabinet, like a guitar cab.
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  I'm borrowing my neighbor's orange head right now so I could
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  check the cab, and the problem with borrowing my neighbor's
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  orange head that he is passively trying to sell is that I plugged
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  it in and went Oh dear God I understand.
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  I get why everybody gets fucking rock hard about orange shit, but
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  I don't have orange money. Yeah, that's fair.
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  It's the same reason that I refuse to shoot a Matthews bow
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  at a bow shop, because I'm afraid that I'll love it and
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  then I'll want 1 and I don't need to want a Matthews, no.
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  I spent your wallet. $1400 out the door to get my fucking bow
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  tech though. Matthews start there.
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  Yeah, that. Fuck that.
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  Yeah, so I got the 410 cab and I absolutely love it with the
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  orange head on it. So I'm going to have to find a
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  way to make extra fucking money. And then I have a conversation
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  with my neighbor. I got a 25 Watt acoustic bass
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  amp and then I got a bass. That's what that is in the
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  background, sitting over your shoulder.
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  Oh fuck. That is exactly what that is.
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  So fun fact, I used to play bass in a band and I had I I had a
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  nice bass. It wasn't a super expensive bass
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  but it was nice and I loved that thing.
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  It was a Mexican made fretless 4 string Fender jazz bass and it
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  was beautiful and I fucking loved it.
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  And when I left for boot camp and stopped doing music, I gave
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  it to my little brother because he was still doing music along
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  with my 810 cab and the head for it and the rest of my fucking
• 14:34
  gear. The What happened to that?
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  It all grew legs, so Jake, feeling bad about this, replaced
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  the bass that he lost with another fretless 4 string bass.
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  But this is a Schecter and I fucking love it.
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  Hell yes, dude. Thanks.
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  Jake and Jimmy's back. Sorry that was rude of me.
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  I had to get an X-ray on my leg. Yeah, how fucking dare you bro,
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  Where do you get off? What's the Where were we at?
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  What happened? What?
• 15:17
  What who's doing my doing my recap?
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  And I'm talking about the music stuff that I acquired while in
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  Michigan. Oh, OK.
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  And moving off of the music stuff.
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  So perfect timing to come back. The last episode, episode 19,
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  episode 19 was absolutely fucking wild.
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  And for all of you that listened or stumbled across or weren't
• 15:41
  completely fucking scared off by episode 19, I'm actually a
• 15:47
  little bit sorry for what transpired in that episode.
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  I'm still scarred by it, if I'm going to be honest.
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  Yeah, it was a funny fucking episode, but it, it was, it was
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  gross. It was disgusting.
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  And everyone I told about it, I, I gave the warning that the
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  episode was not fit for human consumption.
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  And then I even titled the fucking episode that everybody
• 16:18
  has been warned. It's a rough one.
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  But it it's so fucking funny though.
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  How's that tooth there, Jimmy bothering you?
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  Tooth is bugging me, I'm not going to lie.
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  It feels weird. It's very sharp.
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  It's it's sensitive to hot and cold.
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  Yeah, no way it. Makes me it makes me talk funny.
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  It's I would not recommend. Is it loose?
• 16:53
  No. Oh shit.
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  Damn you. Yeah, I got a maybe go to a
• 17:00
  dentist or something. Nah, I think it'll fall out on
• 17:03
  its own. It'll just take a file to it.
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  When you get home, it'll be all right.
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  Yeah. Yeah, so I'm kind of sorry for
• 17:15
  episode 19. We're probably not going to do
• 17:19
  an episode like that again for at least 19 more episodes.
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  So you've got some time and then a call back to episode 19.
• 17:31
  Jimmy, where are we at with bourbon now?
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  I. Wish I had some.
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  Have you unsworn off of bourbon? Probably not like, I mean the
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  Blantons was good. You know which, You know, I
• 17:53
  could finally say this without Luke fucking interrupting me.
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  But Blanton's has been on my list of of bourbons that I've
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  really, really wanted to try, but could never justify spending
• 18:06
  120, a $130.00 for a bottle of it.
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  So I wasn't expecting to be able to get my hands on it when I was
• 18:13
  with you guys. So that was cool.
• 18:17
  Definitely not what I imagined it to taste like.
• 18:19
  If it was way smoother, I would really like to know what an old
• 18:23
  fashion looks like with it. So I might, I don't know, I
• 18:29
  might pick up a bottle, I might not, I don't know.
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  It's it's it was, it was nice, but it did not make me feel the
• 18:35
  way the other ones did. Well, yeah, you didn't drink a
• 18:38
  whole fucking glass of it. That's true.
• 18:42
  That's true. But that's because I had to
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  drive home, which, by the way, I didn't get home until 12:30 at
• 18:49
  night. I believe that.
• 18:51
  Damn. I was pissed.
• 18:55
  Like Luke's 4 hour story man. That we honestly could have done
• 19:05
  without. It was so good though.
• 19:12
  How else would we know that Luke's car is a fucking
• 19:15
  biohazard on wheels if not for that story?
• 19:17
  I'm not going to lie, there's only one part of Luke's story
• 19:20
  that I remember, and I'm traumatized by it.
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  Is that? His promo code?
• 19:29
  Is that his promo code? Yes, that part was funny.
• 19:32
  The promo code part was funny. What led to the promo code?
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  Not not funny. I was very traumatized by that.
• 19:40
  Yeah, no, that's fair. So that's the end of my recap.
• 19:45
  Jimmy, let's get into yours and I'll I can read off the things
• 19:48
  that you put on there if you want.
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  Well, I had a whole list of things to talk about with you
• 19:55
  guys on my weekly recap, but like I said earlier, and just
• 19:58
  leave it in, don't add it out. I got a new one as of recently.
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  So it's 8:30 PM right now. Three hours ago I was in a car
• 20:09
  accident. My car is absolutely totaled.
• 20:14
  I was pulling into a gas station and honestly, I think, I think
• 20:20
  God stepped in and he was like, there's no fucking way you're
• 20:23
  paying 499 a gallon, buddy. And.
• 20:27
  I got smoked. I got smoked by a lady who was
• 20:30
  going way too fast. It was, it was one of those
• 20:37
  situations where I was in the turn lane, turn, turn lane,
• 20:41
  making a left hand turn into the gas station and the lane to my
• 20:46
  left stopped to let me in. So they were waving me to come
• 20:50
  through. So they were letting me and so
• 20:52
  I'm looking and I'm looking through their windows the best
• 20:55
  that I can. There's no cars coming.
• 20:56
  I don't see any cars coming. And so I start creeping forward
• 21:01
  and there's still no cars coming like they're, there's, the cars
• 21:04
  are pretty far away. That's why I, I just start
• 21:07
  edging again. And that's when I realized that
• 21:08
  the car that was coming was coming way faster than she
• 21:11
  should have been, especially because there was, it was not a
• 21:15
  green light for her. She had no business.
• 21:17
  She was going over 50 miles an hour easy.
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  She smokes me so hard. My car did a 360.
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  All of my airbags deployed. I landed in a ditch right side
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  up and I got hit so hard that my car turned off and my doors were
• 21:40
  locked and I couldn't get out. And that this is kind of funny.
• 21:44
  I couldn't get out and I thought the doors were trapped and shut.
• 21:48
  They were just locked. I had to unlock them and I got
• 21:50
  out of the car. The door, the doors on my
• 21:54
  passenger side will not open. They are.
• 21:57
  They are pin shut. She hit me hard.
• 22:03
  She hit me so hard my my driver side tire exploded.
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  She didn't even hit that side of the car.
• 22:09
  Jesus. Damn.
• 22:11
  So I will post, I'll post some pictures and stuff of that, but
• 22:20
  shout out to my buddy Jake man. So I'm on the phone or that the
• 22:26
  cops come up, cops are on scene and my phone's ringing.
• 22:29
  That's my buddy Jake. I haven't talked to Jake in a
• 22:33
  year at least. And I knew Jake worked in the
• 22:38
  area. So I knew it probably had
• 22:39
  something to do with the accident because me and Jake
• 22:41
  don't talk a lot. And he happens to work at a
• 22:45
  different place in in the city that I was in, which is Wixom.
• 22:48
  And he's like, is, was that fucking you on the side of the
• 22:51
  road? Are you OK?
• 22:52
  I was like, that was me. And he was like, without even
• 22:54
  hesitating, he's like, I'm turning around.
• 22:57
  And so he turned around and he got there and they insisted that
• 23:02
  I go under the ambulance to get looked at.
• 23:04
  But I know that deal. Like I know they're going to
• 23:06
  charge me for it and it's going to probably be out of my my
• 23:08
  network. So I was like, I don't want to,
• 23:11
  they made me go in anyway to make sure I was alive.
• 23:13
  But they, they had me turn down the extra services and stuff so
• 23:16
  I wouldn't get billed. And I have a story for you boys
• 23:23
  and it is very funny. So there's probably at least 10
• 23:31
  people there, paramedics, firefighters, cop cars or cop
• 23:35
  cops. I mean, I'm in the ambulance
• 23:38
  right now and I'm with 22 paramedics and a firefighter
• 23:43
  whack walks up to my car and he goes, hey, bud, which one's your
• 23:46
  car? And I go, he goes, are you
• 23:49
  driving the truck, Traverse? And I go, yeah, man.
• 23:53
  And he goes, you got some interesting valve stems,
• 23:56
  brother. And I was like, I was like, what
• 24:01
  are you talking about? And he goes, your white valve
• 24:03
  stems. And I go, I don't have white
• 24:07
  valve stems. He's like, oh brother, He's
• 24:10
  like, I got to tell you something.
• 24:12
  Somebody got you good. He's like, you have Dicks for
• 24:17
  valve stems. And I'm like, what?
• 24:21
  And sure enough, these I walk out and these are my valve
• 24:29
  stems. I'm laughing so hard.
• 24:32
  All, all, all of those cops and paramedics and everything,
• 24:36
  they're circled around my car and I was like, bro, I didn't
• 24:39
  know these were on there. I was like, I was like, this is
• 24:42
  such a shitty situation, But I got to admit, I can't think of a
• 24:46
  funnier way for me to find this out.
• 24:49
  And they're all dying, dude, I'm dying.
• 24:52
  I'm I like I have to, I crawl down into the ditch and I get it
• 24:57
  off of my my tire like, like I had to have it.
• 25:01
  And but there's also shout out to my work though.
• 25:05
  So Jake took me to my work after work, let me borrow a truck so I
• 25:11
  have means of transportation. I drove first thing I did is I
• 25:15
  drove to the junkyard, made sure I didn't have anything important
• 25:19
  in there because junk yards will steal your shit.
• 25:23
  So I had I had about 60 rounds of 450 ammo in in there.
• 25:27
  So I had to get that and because my, my bag was still in there
• 25:33
  from when I dropped my gun off at Luke's, so I had to get my
• 25:38
  450 MO out. So I got that.
• 25:41
  I got the picture of me and Maddie that I had in there and
• 25:43
  my, my dash, I put that in my wallet.
• 25:47
  I had some gift cards in there for ice cream places that I take
• 25:50
  the kids to. I got that out of there.
• 25:52
  I got everything of value out of there that I was worried about
• 25:55
  going missing. And then I drove home, took a
• 25:58
  shower. Everybody is telling me to go to
• 26:01
  the hospital. I'm like, I'm like, I'm good.
• 26:05
  I feel fine. Everything's moving.
• 26:07
  I'm sharp as a tack. I got hit 45 minutes ago and I'm
• 26:10
  already in a new car. Like I'm on my way to go take a
• 26:13
  shower. I got all my stuff out of my old
• 26:15
  car. I was like, if I had a
• 26:16
  concussion, I wouldn't be on it like I am right now.
• 26:19
  And I got Dicks on my tires. I was like, things are good.
• 26:24
  So I drive, I drive home and take a shower and I got to blow
• 26:31
  my nose and there's blood. So I was like, that's a little.
• 26:35
  Weird. No shit.
• 26:37
  So like like a good amount of blood.
• 26:41
  So I was like, you know what, it's probably from getting
• 26:44
  busted in the face by the by the by the by the steering wheel.
• 26:48
  I'm assuming that's why I'm missing a tooth or half a tooth.
• 26:53
  I think I got busted by the steering wheel when the when the
• 26:55
  airbags deployed. That sucks because even
• 27:02
  breathing, the cold air, for me, breathing is hurting my tooth.
• 27:06
  So I get that fixed. I've got an exposed nerve.
• 27:10
  My leg hurts. I've got a limp now.
• 27:13
  Now that I've been sitting a while, when I go to get up, it's
• 27:15
  like it feels like I got a big ass Charlie horse and I can
• 27:18
  crack my sternum with my finger. It pops, it goes and I told the
• 27:24
  doctor that and he's like, yeah, we're going to get you ACT scan.
• 27:26
  I was like, that's not normal. He goes no.
• 27:29
  And I go OK, so they hooked me up to an EKG.
• 27:33
  They wanted to make sure that I didn't have any heart bruising
• 27:35
  from the sternum. This just happened today.
• 27:41
  So I'm I'm, I'm low key, even though I'm in good spirits, I'm
• 27:45
  very stressed out. I owed money on the car.
• 27:50
  I've been trying really, really hard to pay it off.
• 27:52
  I've been trying really, really hard to get my credit up.
• 27:55
  My credit's not where I want it to be right now.
• 27:58
  And this morning I had $0.26 in my bank account.
• 28:03
  Not a really good time to be in an accident and have car get
• 28:06
  told. We'll see what happens.
• 28:10
  I do have full coverage, so there's that.
• 28:15
  But yeah, we'll, we'll see what happens.
• 28:19
  But hey, Friday's payday. So when you guys are listening
• 28:23
  to this, I'll have gotten paid. So that's good.
• 28:26
  I can rest easy knowing that I got a paycheck.
• 28:29
  But man, I am low key kind of stressed right now.
• 28:34
  So and I don't have an, I don't have my documents right now to
• 28:40
  see what are the docs Apple, but I know to see what my other
• 28:43
  weekly recap is. But I had some goodies.
• 28:50
  Jesus Christ gonna say like you just calling in from fuck
• 28:54
  hospital and regaling us with that.
• 28:56
  It is. It's good enough.
• 28:58
  You've done your part. I got a video that I can send
• 29:02
  you now of the Dicks of the paramedics.
• 29:06
  OK, hang on one second. OK, I'm podcasting, so I'm.
• 29:15
  But yeah, we are. Yeah, follow three damn dudes on
• 29:22
  Facebook and Instagram. And I'm not Instagram, but soon
• 29:26
  Instagram. YouTube.
• 29:28
  Apple Podcast. Yeah, follow Rifle, Rifle and
• 29:32
  Ratchet if you like dog cum, but.
• 29:42
  Mike just spit his burp and everywhere.
• 29:44
  I know it's expensive bourbon, buddy.
• 29:46
  I almost did. That's funny, but yeah.
• 29:57
  Hey, do you want to tell us about your Morel hunting
• 29:59
  escapade? Did you get those videos
• 30:03
  clipped? No, not yet.
• 30:05
  Dude, I sent you gold man. Yeah, I'm, I'm going to stitch
• 30:09
  all those together and put them on our YouTube channel.
• 30:14
  So I've never been Morel hunting I've always wanted to.
• 30:20
  I'm seeing posts everywhere that people are finding them.
• 30:24
  So me and Maddie had a kid free weekend so we were going to go
• 30:31
  mellow up Morel hunting over the weekend.
• 30:34
  But it dawned on me I was like I don't even know how to look for
• 30:37
  these things. I was like, I should probably go
• 30:41
  and see if I can't figure that out because she's at school.
• 30:45
  I don't have any kids because, you know, she, my son's with his
• 30:49
  mom and I had free time. Like Maddie wasn't coming over.
• 30:55
  We didn't have the podcast. I forget what day it was, but I
• 30:58
  was like, you know what, I'm just going to go hit one of the
• 31:00
  recreational areas and I put like 4 miles into the woods for
• 31:04
  4.3 miles and I went everywhere. I went down into the swamps.
• 31:11
  I was looking for trees, which by the way, they tell you that
• 31:16
  when you're looking for morale mushrooms, you want to, you want
• 31:19
  to look for like a dying Elm tree.
• 31:21
  So the thing about Elm trees is that you can tell that you're
• 31:27
  looking at an Elm tree by the way that it is, and that's all I
• 31:31
  can tell you because all the fucking trees look the same to
• 31:34
  me. And I can't figure out what the
• 31:37
  hell an Elm tree is. So I'm looking under every
• 31:39
  goddamn tree that I can find, and if it's dead, Hell yeah.
• 31:43
  But I looked everywhere and I didn't see a freaking thing.
• 31:48
  I found seven types of animal shit, and I found no Morel
• 31:53
  mushrooms. I caught 2 snakes.
• 31:55
  I saw three bumblebees in the woods.
• 31:58
  No Morel mushrooms. I found a red Stripe bottle that
• 32:03
  had its label taken off. No Morel mushrooms.
• 32:07
  And I we ended up going again on Sunday to a place that we knew
• 32:14
  somebody had found some. Still didn't find any.
• 32:18
  I have no. Idea what I'm doing.
• 32:19
  Found him. He he sent us a map with a
• 32:22
  circle on it. So we went to that map and I
• 32:26
  still didn't find him. So The thing is though is about
• 32:32
  about Morel mushrooms, is that it's still technically a little
• 32:35
  early. They're small right now.
• 32:38
  They are growing, people are fighting them, but they are,
• 32:44
  they're not. It's not peak season right now.
• 32:47
  Like from what I'm being told, Mother's Day is going to be
• 32:51
  peak. So right now you're going to
• 32:53
  find them. When it gets warm enough, Once
• 32:55
  the ground hits 55°, it's game on.
• 32:59
  So the ground is a 55° in some areas where the sun is
• 33:02
  constantly on them, but everywhere else is just not
• 33:05
  there yet. So they're not growing yet.
• 33:07
  But I tried, ended up putting a lot of miles into the woods.
• 33:12
  I was happy with that. I was, you know, it was, it was
• 33:16
  good to get the exercise, but yeah, so.
• 33:23
  I've got something to to tack on to your morale escapade.
• 33:28
  What's that? So I like I I know of Morel
• 33:33
  mushrooms and they're they're kind of a big deal if you can
• 33:35
  find them and you can find them consistently because they're of
• 33:38
  the of the mushrooms, like they're not an easy one to find.
• 33:42
  Yeah. And then I looked up what a
• 33:45
  picture of these look like, so I realize I had no fucking idea.
• 33:49
  Right. And then I realized that when I
• 33:52
  cut my grass last weekend, I fucking ran over Morel
• 33:57
  mushrooms. That's hilarious.
• 34:01
  So remember where you cut them down because you'll probably
• 34:04
  find more in that area. Yeah, I went looking right after
• 34:09
  you sent those videos because I I did all of those things pretty
• 34:13
  quick and I have no idea where that was, but I know I have them
• 34:18
  somewhere in my yard. Yeah, people say they start
• 34:25
  growing like crazy after a rain too, so keep an eye out.
• 34:30
  They'll be back. Yeah, so you've also got pot
• 34:34
  roast and grilling and sous video and something about Steve.
• 34:41
  Steve. Yeah.
• 34:43
  All right, so I got a sous video, so I, I'm experimenting
• 34:49
  with that. You guys are going to be getting
• 34:51
  some cooking content. I've decided you guys are, you
• 34:56
  guys are going to, you guys are going to kind of go on this
• 34:59
  voyage with me and figuring out the sous video.
• 35:03
  I bought a really, really cheap chunk of meat.
• 35:06
  It was a rump roast bottom round.
• 35:08
  It was a bottom round, which is a super, super tough cut of meat
• 35:13
  and it was like 2 point something pounds.
• 35:17
  I put it in the sous video for 24 hours at 131° and it could
• 35:25
  made it so tender. I could pull it apart with my
• 35:27
  fingers like it would do the, it would do the fold test that you
• 35:31
  would put on a brisket and stuff like that.
• 35:33
  I and then I, I seared it after I pulled it out of the sous
• 35:35
  video. It was really good.
• 35:37
  Highly recommended sous video. So I'm going to be using that
• 35:41
  on, on things like venison and stuff like that on back strap
• 35:45
  and stuff like that. Like you guys are going to see
• 35:47
  you guys are going to see some content coming for that.
• 35:51
  As far as grilling goes, I used to grill a lot like I used to.
• 35:58
  It used to be like my favorite thing to do.
• 36:00
  And I made, I finally pulled the grill out and I made chicken and
• 36:07
  it was funny. I made it for Maddie.
• 36:09
  And she looks at me and she goes, this is really, really
• 36:12
  fucking good. And I go, thank you.
• 36:15
  I was like, yeah, your, your boyfriend used to use a grill a
• 36:18
  lot. She's like, my boyfriend's going
• 36:20
  to continue to use a really hard to use the grill a lot because
• 36:24
  these are really good. So I'm going to start grilling
• 36:28
  again too, which means you guys are going to get some grilling
• 36:30
  content. So you guys are you guys are
• 36:33
  going to get a lot of cooking content coming.
• 36:37
  We're just going to have to edit some stuff and but I'll get the
• 36:40
  footage and we'll do like a how to.
• 36:42
  As for the pot roast, I made the best pot roast I have ever had
• 36:50
  and I know what I haven't written it down yet, but I know
• 36:53
  the recipe. Basically I bought a big ass
• 36:58
  Chuck roast and I browned it on both sides and I seasoned it
• 37:02
  with Montreal steak seasoning and garlic pepper.
• 37:06
  And in my slow cooker that I have, I have it's, it's
• 37:11
  basically like like an insta pot, only you put it in the
• 37:17
  oven. It's literally the same shot,
• 37:18
  same shape as like as a slow cooker, but you put it in the
• 37:22
  oven. So it's basically like Dutch
• 37:24
  oven meat slow cooker. So you could use a Dutch oven or
• 37:27
  you could use a slow cooker. But what I did is I put three
• 37:33
  pieces of bacon at the bottom and then I seasoned, I put, I
• 37:37
  put the same seasonings on it, Montreal steak seasoning and
• 37:41
  garlic pepper. And then I put the meat in
• 37:43
  there, which I had already seasoned and everything.
• 37:47
  And then I poured in one packet of beefy onion soup mix and one
• 37:53
  packet of brown gravy mix. And then I put like a cup of
• 38:04
  chicken broth. Not beef broth, but chicken
• 38:07
  broth. And then I didn't have cream of
• 38:09
  mushroom soup. I had cream of chicken soup.
• 38:11
  So I put two big can. Well, I put one big can of cream
• 38:15
  of chicken soup on top and then I cooked it for a couple hours.
• 38:23
  I let it, I let it cook and then I threw the potato.
• 38:26
  I threw a bag of baby potatoes in and then a whole onion that I
• 38:31
  sliced up to the sizes that I wanted.
• 38:34
  And then on top of that, I poured another can of that big
• 38:37
  creamy chicken, cream of chicken on.
• 38:40
  And I just cooked it for another hour or two.
• 38:46
  And my God, dude, that bacon flavor and the beefy onion and
• 38:51
  the chicken flavor, it all came together.
• 38:54
  Dude, it was so good. It was amazing.
• 38:57
  Like I'll never make it another way.
• 39:00
  Like I figured out like a really good recipe just on an accident
• 39:04
  because I didn't have the right shit.
• 39:07
  And so I'm going to write it down.
• 39:09
  I'm going to do it again. I'm going to get in the video of
• 39:11
  it to show you guys how to do it and I'll get it written down so
• 39:18
  everybody can have it. But you guys got when I do get
• 39:20
  it written, written down, you guys got to try it.
• 39:22
  It was amazing. Stay tuned for a Three Damn
• 39:25
  Dudes cookbook. Hell yeah.
• 39:28
  Hell yeah. Which I still have all of my old
• 39:31
  recipes from the other thing so. Hell yeah, dude, yeah.
• 39:38
  So we can use those because those were good as fuck too.
• 39:43
  And then the Steve one. So Steve was my buddy at work
• 39:56
  and. Yeah, he's got a great ass.
• 39:59
  Yeah, he does. And.
• 40:01
  We have a lot of cool guys. We have a lot of cool guys at
• 40:04
  work. And there's been a couple times
• 40:07
  while I've been talking to Steve and we have a labor foreman who
• 40:14
  works there. His name is Sean.
• 40:16
  And Sean has the tendency to walk by if like when I'm talking
• 40:22
  to Steve. And he seems to always overhear
• 40:25
  the weirdest shit. Like it just happens.
• 40:28
  Like he's like it. Like you could see, like he goes
• 40:31
  and gives a double take and stuff.
• 40:32
  So now I've made a game out of it.
• 40:34
  I decided today and I did it today for the first time, where
• 40:37
  every time he walks by, it doesn't matter what I'm talking
• 40:40
  about with Steve, I will say something out of pocket and just
• 40:44
  make it sound like I'm, I'm, that's what I'm talking about.
• 40:48
  Like, so I'm sitting with Santa with Steve and I see Sean coming
• 40:53
  and as soon as Sean gets in with a with an ear distance, I go.
• 40:57
  No, like seriously Steve. It was a nice sizable girthy
• 41:01
  cock to which Sean obviously made a face, left chuckled,
• 41:12
  wanted nothing to do with it and kept going.
• 41:14
  And that's going to be my new bit from now on every time Sean
• 41:22
  walks by. Because it was funny.
• 41:25
  You need to do it one time where you're just staring at the wall
• 41:28
  talking to not Steve when Sean walks by.
• 41:33
  Talking about my talking about my new valve, my new valve
• 41:38
  stems, Yeah, which I can't wait to find out who did that to me.
• 41:43
  So I text Luke. He said it was not him.
• 41:46
  Text your dad. Not yet.
• 41:50
  I doubt it was your dad. Though yeah, I I also doubt it.
• 41:56
  It had to have been somebody at work to which I can't wait to
• 42:00
  ask and then tell them what happened and then show them the
• 42:05
  videos of the car accident and how I figured out that they were
• 42:08
  there. Because that is so funny.
• 42:10
  I could not think of a more comical way for me to find out
• 42:14
  about the valve stems. Dude like.
• 42:18
  Plot list it was Sean and that was payback for all of the out
• 42:21
  of. Pocket.
• 42:23
  That would be so funny, but at the same time, if it if they got
• 42:27
  put on today, they might be cursed.
• 42:30
  Somebody might have put hexed cocks on my tires.
• 42:35
  You know, like these are the thoughts that I have as I'm
• 42:41
  sitting in the CT scan. I'm like, do I have a cursed
• 42:45
  cock in my? Pocket.
• 42:49
  I guess we'll have to wait to see what your results say.
• 42:53
  Yeah. But oh, I think I covered
• 43:01
  everything in my dock. My document, yeah.
• 43:05
  Yeah, that's all I got. For weekly recap.
• 43:08
  That's fair. And you even went above and
• 43:11
  beyond. You talked about shit that's not
• 43:13
  even in your recap on the dock. Did I are?
• 43:19
  You fucking stupid, how do you do your head?
• 43:23
  Why? What did I talk about?
• 43:25
  I talked about the Sue Reed. Uh huh.
• 43:29
  The pot roast. And yeah, Shawn's counting.
• 43:33
  Yeah, we're all grilling. What else did?
• 43:36
  You talk about Jimmy. The cursed cock.
• 43:41
  What's the whole story surrounding the cursed cock?
• 43:45
  Oh well, that's a whole that that's part of my weekly recap.
• 43:49
  Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That happened this week.
• 43:55
  I thought you guys were talk. I thought you guys were saying
• 43:57
  that. I went off off off topic.
• 44:01
  No, no, you added to your recap. So I said you went above and
• 44:04
  beyond because you hit shit that wasn't even in the dock.
• 44:08
  I apologize. I'm blowing bleed for I'm
• 44:12
  blowing bleed from my face. I'm I've got blood in my snot.
• 44:19
  Jimmy, I hate to break deep, buddy.
• 44:21
  I think you're running off of adrenaline for most of that.
• 44:24
  Probably did end up with fucking concussion.
• 44:29
  I don't, I don't know. I don't feel like it, my eyes.
• 44:33
  So like I kind of gave myself the check, like when I got home,
• 44:38
  I took a flashlight to my eyes in the mirror to make sure that
• 44:41
  my pupils were dilate and everything like that.
• 44:43
  They were responding like they should.
• 44:47
  I was. I was really, really cognitive.
• 44:49
  And honestly, I was killing it. Like I had everybody laughing
• 44:54
  hysterically in a time of crisis.
• 45:00
  I feel like if I was concussed, I wouldn't have been so sharp.
• 45:03
  Like I feel like I was at my best and like I need, I need to
• 45:08
  get more adrenaline dude because I was on one.
• 45:13
  All right, your final, your final concussion test.
• 45:16
  Did you tell the cops, the firefighters, and the EMTs to
• 45:19
  listen to the Three Damn Dudes podcast?
• 45:21
  Thought about it. You didn't.
• 45:23
  I did think about it. Concussion, yeah, all right.
• 45:27
  Percent impaired decision making.
• 45:31
  That's a I've been. Oh.
• 45:32
  I got this too. You got an elbow?
• 45:35
  Oh. Damn.
• 45:37
  Yeah, so I've been thinking about telling a lot of people
• 45:42
  about the podcast, but here's the problem.
• 45:46
  The most recent episode we did was fucking terrible.
• 45:51
  I can't want to subject anybody to that.
• 45:56
  We just talked about dog cum for 35 minutes.
• 46:00
  Dude. Disgusting.
• 46:04
  And This is why Gavin doesn't listen to the episodes that he's
• 46:06
  not a part of. Oh, I do have.
• 46:08
  I do have another. I do have kind of another thing
• 46:12
  that involves rifle and ratchet. Oh.
• 46:17
  I am going to work on making my own decal for my gun.
• 46:24
  I, I, so I've decided that I'm going to name my 450 Bushmaster
• 46:31
  the Wendigo and I'm going to do a whole Wendigo themed engraving
• 46:37
  on the whole rifle. Like it's going to be sick.
• 46:42
  So I already talked to Luke. He's already, we're kind of
• 46:47
  already in talks of him showing me what I need to him showing me
• 46:50
  some videos he took of how to use the, the software to make
• 46:55
  the designs and stuff like that. And and so I'm going to have a
• 46:59
  pretty bad ass looking rifle. But you're worried about cursed
• 47:03
  cock valve stem coverage. You're about to walk into the
• 47:05
  woods where wendigos live with the Wendigo on your fucking
• 47:08
  rifle. I could name it the cursed cock.
• 47:13
  You're going to get cursed cock in the woods.
• 47:18
  But it'll be sweet. Swear God the window had the
• 47:25
  biggest, girthiest cock I've ever seen.
• 47:32
  Jimmy bent over his fucking tree stand ladder just thinking.
• 47:34
  I got to tell Steve about this. It wasn't so much the the length
• 47:41
  that that took me off guard, it was the width.
• 47:44
  Dude was packing an absolute cheese wheel of a unit.
• 47:49
  It's all the splinters in my colon I got to deal with now.
• 47:52
  Guys, my tooth feels so fucking weird.
• 47:55
  I bet half of it's fucking gone. Jimmy, stop touching it.
• 48:02
  You're you're literally doing a David after dentist bit right
• 48:06
  now. Quit touching it.
• 48:08
  I'm. Sorry, you know if you had cast
• 48:12
  up. On a dentist.
• 48:13
  Over the past couple of years, it probably wouldn't have
• 48:15
  happened. Maybe you might be on to
• 48:20
  something there. Yeah, folks, go to the dentist.
• 48:24
  That's how you don't get in car accidents.
• 48:27
  Yeah, because that was the message.
• 48:34
  Speaking of the dentist, I got to make an appointment to get
• 48:37
  some cavities filled. We just got a shame everybody on
• 48:44
  this fucking podcast about going to the dentist.
• 48:48
  Yeah, don't bully me, I'll come. Damn.
• 48:56
  Oh boy. Sorry guys, I can't talk right
• 49:01
  now. I'm making come.
• 49:08
  That'll just happened to Jimmy. You know, it's like quality just
• 49:12
  improved. By like 100% what the fuck?
• 49:15
  His concussions wearing off. I feel concussed.
• 49:20
  Oh, the lady that hit me is here somewhere.
• 49:30
  I saw her when I got wheeled. I saw her when I got wheeled in.
• 49:34
  The lady was like the lady's the lady pushing my bed as she's
• 49:39
  pushing me to to to go get looked at.
• 49:42
  She was like, So what happened? I was like I was in a car
• 49:45
  accident and then she's pushing me past the ladies room.
• 49:47
  I go, holy shit. I was like, that's the lady that
• 49:50
  hit me. And she goes, really?
• 49:51
  I go, I swear to God, that's hilarious.
• 49:53
  And she goes kind of awkward. I was like kinda.
• 49:56
  I was like, but there she is. I was like, go ask her what
• 49:59
  happened to me. Is every 35 minutes at the call
• 50:04
  button and go I need to go on a field trip just go past her
• 50:07
  room? Hi friend.
• 50:09
  Just what sucks? Getting wheeled past just.
• 50:13
  So what sucks about the whole thing, and it really does suck,
• 50:18
  is that even though she was flying, I was the one making the
• 50:25
  left hand turn, so I was the one without the right of way.
• 50:31
  I got the ticket so it was my fault.
• 50:36
  Didn't you have a red light? See that?
• 50:38
  It's kind of what I figured when you were telling the story.
• 50:41
  I just didn't want to bring it up.
• 50:43
  Yeah, yeah, I knew, I knew. I knew as soon.
• 50:48
  Like honestly it was the first thing I thought of.
• 50:50
  Like literally as her car was slamming into my car, it was the
• 50:55
  first thing I was thinking about is fuck this one's on me like.
• 50:59
  Fuck, my insurance is going to skyrocket.
• 51:01
  Like I swear to you, she was going way faster than she was
• 51:05
  supposed to be. Like she was hauling ass, but
• 51:09
  because I was making a left hand turn, it's on me.
• 51:14
  So it's. Honestly fuck those guys that
• 51:18
  were waving you through if they didn't fucking see her flying
• 51:22
  up. Yeah, I mean, it is what it is.
• 51:28
  I mean, I get it. Like I cuz I like listen, I'm
• 51:33
  the type of guy and I'm not trying to put this, I'm not
• 51:35
  saying this to put this on her because like I made the left
• 51:40
  hand turn. So like, I understand why it's
• 51:42
  my fault and I told the cop that too, but I'm the type of person
• 51:47
  that when somebody's pulling in somewhere, if the lane next to
• 51:51
  me is stop letting that person in, I also stop to let that
• 51:55
  person in because it's pretty rare that everybody comes
• 51:58
  together to like let somebody in.
• 52:03
  And like I said, it's not like her light was green.
• 52:07
  She had no, she had nowhere to go.
• 52:11
  She like she like stopping would have costed her nothing like the
• 52:16
  only thing she did by driving that fucking fast was just going
• 52:21
  to get her to the red lights, red white red light quicker but
• 52:27
  and ended up just making her car a part of my car and my car in
• 52:30
  the ditch with cocks all over it.
• 52:35
  So. Well, hashtag thoughts and
• 52:38
  prayers for a speedy recovery for both of you, yeah?
• 52:42
  Yeah, yeah. She looked all right.
• 52:49
  The first. Yeah, it was, it was, it was a
• 52:51
  whole, it was a whole weird thing.
• 52:56
  Like the first thing I did is I asked her if she was OK.
• 53:02
  She said she didn't know. And then immediately started
• 53:07
  like blaming me. And I was like, I know what
• 53:10
  happened. I was like, I'm, I was like, I
• 53:13
  just want to make sure you're OK.
• 53:15
  I was like, I was like, was anybody else in the car?
• 53:19
  And she like at that point just started ignoring me and making
• 53:23
  phone calls. Like she wasn't even calling
• 53:24
  911. She didn't give a fuck if I was
• 53:27
  OK. She didn't give a fuck about
• 53:29
  anything but herself. Like it was just, you know, like
• 53:35
  it was just kind of wild. And I, and I told her I was
• 53:39
  like, it's I was like, this is really my first car accident.
• 53:42
  I, you know, I, I didn't see you like I'd like you kind of came
• 53:47
  out of nowhere. Like I didn't say it that way to
• 53:49
  put the blame on her, but I was just trying to explain to her
• 53:52
  like, I don't know, it's not like I'm just pulling in front
• 53:55
  of people all the time. Like I'm, I've never caused a
• 53:57
  car accident before and I'm, I've got so much driving
• 54:03
  experience. Like I drove professionally for
• 54:06
  years, like as a job, and but like, it was, it was just a
• 54:11
  weird thing, dude. It was a weird.
• 54:14
  It was, it was weird. I don't know how else to put it.
• 54:18
  Yeah, especially if she's going to be a cunt about it after the
• 54:20
  fact. No, fuck her speedy recovery.
• 54:23
  I'm curious to see if she curious to see if she tries to
• 54:27
  sue me. Police report.
• 54:29
  See if her name's Karen. I I'm curious to see if she
• 54:35
  tries to sue me or something. We'll see how.
• 54:37
  We'll see how this goes. Joke's on her, I got $0.26 in
• 54:41
  the bank so but. You know, but next week the
• 54:49
  three damn dudes under new ownership.
• 54:57
  Just start a new name and buy a new $40 fucking podcast.
• 55:01
  Boxes or plays? For three days she'll buy us the
• 55:06
  good shit. I am curious why my leg?
• 55:13
  Hurts the fucking podcast. It's just going to be how to
• 55:15
  prevent car accidents. Yeah, don't turn left.
• 55:23
  Yeah, no left turns. Unless you're Derek Zoolander,
• 55:27
  in which case you can only turn left.
• 55:28
  It's not an Ampy Turner. What's the black lung pup?
• 55:41
  That's Zoolander, right? Yeah, you can derelict my balls,
• 55:46
  Hansel. All right, Gavin, what do you
• 55:51
  got for your recap? It's not nearly as fucking
• 55:58
  eventful as Jimmy as it was. That's that's hard act to
• 56:04
  follow. God damn me.
• 56:07
  Give me 30 minutes. Hold on, I'll be back.
• 56:12
  Kevin's going to call in from a hospital in Arkansas, so I got
• 56:17
  in an accident. Yeah, no, just the life's being
• 56:25
  fucking spicy again. Shit sucks.
• 56:28
  Picked up. We're all fucking smoking habit
• 56:30
  again after quitting for. It's been a while.
• 56:36
  Been like a year or so now. Yeah.
• 56:42
  So I had to fucking start that back up because fucking why not?
• 56:48
  And the the biggest fun thing just starting therapy again it
• 56:56
  that today actually, and I forgot how fucking excruciating
• 57:02
  it is to do with the VA. What's therapy from the VA?
• 57:08
  Yeah. Am I frozen for you?
• 57:11
  Yep. Yeah, a little bit.
• 57:13
  Are you frozen on your end? Yeah, it'll buff.
• 57:18
  Yeah, it'll be fun. Well, the yeah, it's a couple of
• 57:26
  spicy parts in there and it was just kind of fucking funny going
• 57:34
  through everything and even just like more so not gonna get too
• 57:41
  deep in it like the end of it because it was mainly just the
• 57:44
  intake. You know what's bothering you,
• 57:47
  What do you want to get out of it, blah, blah, blah.
• 57:50
  And I stopped say about a year, a year and a half ago, stopped
• 57:56
  going therapy. And a lot has changed in it now
• 58:02
  to where when I was going, it was kind of like open-ended.
• 58:07
  It was like, as long as you got problems, like, you know, we'll
• 58:11
  kind of work through things. It wasn't really like a set like
• 58:13
  end date for any of it. But going through it all now the
• 58:18
  VA is switching to kind of more like focused approaches.
• 58:23
  So think of like like acceptance and commitment therapy, fucking
• 58:29
  CPT, things like that, that they can put an end date on where
• 58:35
  it's like, OK, cool, we'll help you through 12 sessions, 16.
• 58:39
  And then like you gotta get out because there's so many fuck
• 58:43
  people going for these services and only a handful of fuck
• 58:48
  providers. So they're really trying to
• 58:50
  crack down on like getting people out the door is a bad way
• 58:55
  to put it, but kind of like capping limits and not letting
• 58:59
  it just be so open-ended anymore.
• 59:05
  And we're going through that. And she kind of like went to try
• 59:10
  to make a point because I fucking, she was kind of dancing
• 59:14
  around it. And I was like, so is this kind
• 59:17
  kind of be the bullshit where it's like you get 12 or 16
• 59:19
  sessions and then you get kicked out?
• 59:21
  And she was like kind of where it's not.
• 59:26
  It's like if you have things that we're still working
• 59:29
  through, like, yeah, we're not just going to kick you out.
• 59:32
  However, if we can help you in like this shorter amount of
• 59:37
  time, what we're going to try and do.
• 59:42
  So there was that and then it's the same kind of fucking like
• 59:50
  bullshit running around where it's like I waited I think four
• 59:54
  months to get this appointment. Was there doing it, talking on
• 1:00:00
  the back end of like, it's like, yeah, I know we hit a couple of
• 1:00:04
  heavy things today, kind of like established baseline, but
• 1:00:07
  there's going to be a bit of a weight before I see you again.
• 1:00:11
  And I was like, yeah, no, kind of fucking figured.
• 1:00:13
  Like figured this is just intake, you know, going through
• 1:00:17
  all that and then we'll set up multiple appointments.
• 1:00:21
  She was like, alright, cool. How does 29th of July sound?
• 1:00:25
  I was like, Oh my fucking God. I was like, OK, cool.
• 1:00:34
  So yeah, fucking 03 goddamn months.
• 1:00:39
  But I was able to schedule. Therapy sessions.
• 1:00:42
  What? Hey, you get quarterly therapy?
• 1:00:45
  Sessions exactly, but it was at least at that point where you're
• 1:00:52
  allowed to like set up multiple. So I've got like 5 or 6 lined
• 1:00:56
  up. So it's not, hey, we're going to
• 1:00:58
  fucking get you in On this date and then won't be able to get
• 1:01:01
  scheduled again for three or four months, which is cool.
• 1:01:05
  I mean, that's fine. And then we got to the end and
• 1:01:12
  she was like, hey, we talked about some of the like some of
• 1:01:14
  the spicy stuff. You brought a few things up.
• 1:01:18
  So we know just got to go through the questionnaire on the
• 1:01:22
  back end, see if we need to fucking throw you in patient or
• 1:01:25
  if you're allowed to leave. You know, everybody knows what
• 1:01:30
  I'm talking about That's been through therapy, although
• 1:01:32
  fucking like risk assessment questionnaires and everything
• 1:01:35
  like that. And apparently they've changed.
• 1:01:42
  So I mean, I'm just going to be fucking out about it because my
• 1:01:47
  shit, it was just the standard like fucking like mental illness
• 1:01:51
  and suicide questionnaire, right?
• 1:01:54
  Say, have you ever had these thoughts?
• 1:01:56
  How often you have these thoughts?
• 1:01:57
  XY and Z And the standard format for it is like, have you ever
• 1:02:05
  had these thoughts? Have you ever had or like any
• 1:02:10
  like no, it's like, have you ever had these thoughts?
• 1:02:17
  How many times in like the past month have you had these
• 1:02:20
  thoughts? Have you ever had a plan intent,
• 1:02:23
  XY and Z and they all break out into like different questions
• 1:02:27
  based off your responses. The first two questions are the
• 1:02:32
  same fucking question where it's have you ever had thoughts about
• 1:02:35
  this? Have you ever had thoughts about
• 1:02:38
  this? And I was like, what?
• 1:02:39
  Wayne? And she was like, oh, this one
• 1:02:41
  is like, like, do you have planned?
• 1:02:44
  Do you have intent XY and Z? And I'm like, why are these the
• 1:02:48
  same fucking question? Usually it's they're separate
• 1:02:53
  questions. So you can like kind of identify
• 1:02:55
  those things. But she was like, I don't know.
• 1:02:59
  She said that she'd worked there for a while and this was like
• 1:03:02
  the fourth version of this form that they've had.
• 1:03:06
  And because I asked her back because I've been in the clinic
• 1:03:11
  before. So I'd gone through like, you're
• 1:03:14
  able to check in, you wait, go and see somebody.
• 1:03:17
  And then there was a period where every time you checked it,
• 1:03:21
  you were given like, how bad is depression bothering you have
• 1:03:24
  bad as anxiety, suicide, suicide, like the forms that you
• 1:03:28
  didn't give your therapist and they were super strict on it.
• 1:03:32
  Everybody that came in, doesn't matter what you were there for,
• 1:03:35
  everybody had to fill one out for like 2 months and then they
• 1:03:37
  never brought it up again. And she was like, yeah, no,
• 1:03:42
  they. You're supposed to get them.
• 1:03:46
  Sometimes I do, sometimes they don't.
• 1:03:48
  I was like, you seem like you're more fed up with this than I am.
• 1:03:51
  Just kind of like, roll their eyes.
• 1:03:53
  And I was like, yeah, OK, cool. BA Healthcare got a little bit.
• 1:03:57
  This is why vets set themselves on fire in the parking lots.
• 1:04:00
  Like, whatever. Yeah, no, it was weird.
• 1:04:10
  Little spicy getting back into it, but it's not the worst thing
• 1:04:15
  in the world. Men done it before, probably
• 1:04:17
  have to do it again in the future.
• 1:04:19
  So yeah. Yeah, well, hi buddy.
• 1:04:24
  I'm proud of you for for doing it again.
• 1:04:27
  OK, thanks. I'm not.
• 1:04:31
  Now you should be. Cheers to brain ninjas.
• 1:04:34
  Cheers. The screen is still frozen, but
• 1:04:36
  I've also got nothing to train but cheers.
• 1:04:42
  I meant to ask Jimmy, are you I'm hooked up to anything you
• 1:04:45
  cruising right now or you just raw dog and everything I'm.
• 1:04:51
  Bareback in this shit. That's fucked up.
• 1:04:55
  Hell, they didn't even ask. Yeah, hey, can I get some
• 1:05:00
  ketamine in this bitch? Like what the fuck's going on?
• 1:05:03
  The service here sucks. Fucking give me some of that.
• 1:05:07
  One star on Yelp. Leave him a Google review.
• 1:05:15
  It was seated off for four hours before they came to get my drink
• 1:05:18
  order. But their bathrooms aren't on
• 1:05:20
  another level. Did we ever talk about that on
• 1:05:25
  the podcast? I don't remember.
• 1:05:27
  We did not. No, not yet.
• 1:05:30
  Well, buckle up, we're fucking about to so I forgot about this.
• 1:05:35
  This was a couple of weeks ago. Went to a new It's like a
• 1:05:41
  brewery brew house that opened up in town.
• 1:05:46
  Hang on, I'm going to leave and join back here and hang on all.
• 1:05:50
  Right, hold on, I'll wait for Jimmy.
• 1:05:52
  Technical Disabilities one be a Three Damn Dudes episode without
• 1:05:58
  it. Yeah, if everything worked then
• 1:06:01
  it just it wouldn't be a show. There it is.
• 1:06:07
  But anyways, me and my dad been at this place for a while.
• 1:06:14
  We've gotten some food and this is a fucking caveat of this
• 1:06:20
  story, but I invited him out so we could just go hang out and
• 1:06:23
  see him in a while. We sit down and work.
• 1:06:26
  We're looking through the fucking menu, the drinks and
• 1:06:31
  everything like that. And I'm like, you know what, I
• 1:06:34
  think I'm think I'm going to get a flight because they had an
• 1:06:37
  option for a single flight or a double flight, so either 4 or 8.
• 1:06:43
  And he was like, yeah, that sounds like a good idea.
• 1:06:45
  They got a lot of different things to try.
• 1:06:47
  They had like 30 different beers.
• 1:06:50
  Waitress comes up and he's like, Oh yeah, I'm going to do, I'm
• 1:06:53
  going to do a double flight. I kind of looked at him.
• 1:06:57
  I was like, OK, I was just going to do a single flight.
• 1:07:01
  But you know, price difference is like, fuck $20 between the
• 1:07:04
  two. And I was like, I know I invited
• 1:07:07
  you out, but he was like, Oh no, I'm paying for me.
• 1:07:10
  I was like, OK, cool. Like I just want to fucking make
• 1:07:14
  sure. Before I had to drop $60.00 on
• 1:07:16
  your ass and I was just expecting like fucking $30
• 1:07:20
  lunch. But caveat, drank a lot of
• 1:07:24
  different beers and it was cool. And then naturally, as one does
• 1:07:31
  after you're drinking a bunch, you got to go to the bathroom,
• 1:07:33
  right? So they go up to the front, find
• 1:07:39
  where they have the bathrooms at because they're kind of in the
• 1:07:41
  back down this hallway secluded. And I walk in and I go, this
• 1:07:47
  fucking looks weird because it's a standard bathroom.
• 1:07:50
  All right, yeah, Sink fucking mirror toilet.
• 1:07:54
  And they're they're single bathroom so won't have time.
• 1:08:00
  This toilet is like 2 feet off the fucking ground.
• 1:08:06
  It was fucking insanely high. I don't know why.
• 1:08:11
  So I'm like, you know what? I'm a fucking pop squad on this
• 1:08:14
  and see what it looks like. I'm average height.
• 1:08:19
  I'm like 5859 somewhere in there.
• 1:08:22
  My feet couldn't touch the ground when I sat on this
• 1:08:26
  fucking toilet. So naturally the first thing I
• 1:08:31
  did was pull out my fucking phone and recorded a video of me
• 1:08:36
  swinging my legs on the toilet and fucking sent it to the guys.
• 1:08:42
  And these are absolute fucking degenerates.
• 1:08:46
  It's. So funny watching you watching
• 1:08:50
  you swing your leg, kick your legs back and forth from a
• 1:08:53
  toilet seat. I'm thinking of like what the
• 1:08:57
  fuck? The Kevin Hart Experience.
• 1:09:04
  This is fucking degenerates. They saw it and they were like,
• 1:09:07
  hey, what the fuck is the name of this place?
• 1:09:09
  So I tell them and then they asked for the address and I send
• 1:09:14
  it to him and they're like, Jimmy sends me a fucking
• 1:09:20
  screenshot of their Google page where he left the review.
• 1:09:26
  It said something along the lines of came for the beer,
• 1:09:29
  stayed for the toilets. Seriously.
• 1:09:34
  Another level. Seriously.
• 1:09:36
  Next level. In similar fashion did the same
• 1:09:40
  thing and this is still a new enough and small enough place.
• 1:09:44
  It's family owned and operated, so they respond to every fucking
• 1:09:49
  Google review and I never check to see if they ever responded to
• 1:09:55
  you guys. I think I saw that they
• 1:09:56
  responded to Jimmy's and they were like, oh this is great, I'm
• 1:10:01
  glad they were up to your standards, blah blah.
• 1:10:02
  I was like, these motherfuckers have no idea.
• 1:10:05
  I should fucking go into the reviews and post the video and
• 1:10:10
  be like yeah toilets are great. So I tried. 3.
• 1:10:16
  I tried to have, I have another group chat that I'm part of
• 1:10:20
  where everybody is living. Everybody except for me lives in
• 1:10:23
  North Carolina. I tried so hard to get all of
• 1:10:27
  them to also leave reviews on that place.
• 1:10:30
  And unfortunately, their humor was not up to par and they
• 1:10:34
  didn't do it. But.
• 1:10:36
  Leave that fucking group chat, you don't need that in your
• 1:10:38
  life. But we were obviously, I was
• 1:10:41
  hoping to have reviews from all over the country about this
• 1:10:46
  place's bathroom. I would have been so funny.
• 1:10:51
  I will love to be the fly in the room during that if they're just
• 1:10:55
  getting did not even review bomb because they're really fucking
• 1:10:59
  five stars of just these fucking little mom and pops looking at
• 1:11:05
  their fucking Google reviews going what the fuck is up?
• 1:11:08
  Why does everybody love the bathrooms?
• 1:11:10
  They. Have 3005 star reviews.
• 1:11:18
  Dude toilet stools is a vibe. It's stools.
• 1:11:23
  What? The fuck?
• 1:11:27
  I've never heard of a toilet that sat that high.
• 1:11:31
  It was fucking ridiculous and it was just like watching the video
• 1:11:38
  back after I recorded it, like it was still the funniest shit
• 1:11:41
  to me. It's what's what's funny is that
• 1:11:45
  all three of us are the same height.
• 1:11:48
  All three of us would have had the same dangling leg situation
• 1:11:51
  on that toilet because I am also 58.
• 1:11:55
  Like I would have done the same exact thing.
• 1:11:58
  I would be like what the fuck? And I would have filmed it as
• 1:12:00
  well. Anytime you don't want to come
• 1:12:03
  down to Arkansas and visit, I'll take you guys to this place.
• 1:12:06
  Kind of want to go down just for that.
• 1:12:09
  Yeah. Yeah, all right, I got you guys.
• 1:12:12
  Next time you're in town, fucking take through.
• 1:12:17
  We'll tell them that we talk about their stuff all the time
• 1:12:20
  on our podcast. Specifically, episode 19.
• 1:12:24
  We talked all about them in episode 19.
• 1:12:26
  Yeah. Listen to 19.
• 1:12:30
  Maybe should I? Go into the settings.
• 1:12:31
  On Spotify and make that the recommended start .0.
• 1:12:36
  My God. No, no.
• 1:12:39
  It's the recommended quit point. Yeah, that that one might guess.
• 1:12:43
  Cancer by PETA. I just wish, I just wish that
• 1:12:51
  these people would come, let me go home.
• 1:12:56
  I'm so tired of being here, boys.
• 1:12:58
  Just take a nap. Yeah, from life, don't.
• 1:13:02
  Think I'm dead? Take a forever nap.
• 1:13:05
  Just unhook, clip all your monitors.
• 1:13:09
  There's like pass out in the bed while it's fucking like.
• 1:13:12
  Like this thing look at this the fuck do I need that for?
• 1:13:16
  Don't haven't done shit in like 3 hours.
• 1:13:20
  You know, like they never use this thing.
• 1:13:27
  Like, why'd they even, oh, hang on, why'd they even put that in
• 1:13:31
  there? Dude, do you know why they put
• 1:13:34
  that in? Why?
• 1:13:38
  They're worried about you fucking sternum in your heart,
• 1:13:41
  so if you immediately go into like fucking cardiac arrest or
• 1:13:44
  some shit because something actually happened, they need
• 1:13:48
  access to your fucking bloodstream to push meds in
• 1:13:51
  super fucking quick. I'm about to pull it out.
• 1:13:53
  It hurts just sitting there. Like this motherfucker's man
• 1:14:02
  died of stupidity in a hospital. Like I don't know what I fuck
• 1:14:06
  tell you. If I knew where the if I knew
• 1:14:09
  where the band aids were, I would pull it out, you know?
• 1:14:17
  For the audio listeners, for the audio listeners who have no idea
• 1:14:23
  where we're talking about pulling out and putting back in
• 1:14:25
  and the painful thing, we're talking about Dicks, obviously.
• 1:14:36
  Should probably preface well, can't preface because it already
• 1:14:38
  happened. If you guys are you watching the
• 1:14:43
  video format of this video? You guys will get to have seen
• 1:14:46
  my valve stem that I was talking about.
• 1:14:51
  Yeah, I'm sure there'll be a picture of that on Facebook and
• 1:14:54
  it'll violate community guidelines.
• 1:14:57
  So. Weird boys.
• 1:15:05
  You mean what's left of your tooth?
• 1:15:08
  Yeah. Hey, no balls, you won't RIP one
• 1:15:13
  of those off. Don't fuck it, don't do that.
• 1:15:20
  Fucking God. Oh, Gary, don't worry, I'll put
• 1:15:30
  it back on. They just like the fucking
• 1:15:37
  doctors, nurses probably just standing outside of your room
• 1:15:40
  listening to you say all this dumb shit.
• 1:15:43
  Bro I think these cables are for my EKG like I don't even think
• 1:15:48
  like I need them on anymore like.
• 1:15:51
  I'm not hit the call button and ask.
• 1:15:53
  Probably do. I already ran my E kg, I don't
• 1:15:57
  think they're going to run another one.
• 1:15:59
  It depends on the results of that EKG.
• 1:16:01
  That's fair, but I think those already came back.
• 1:16:03
  That was funny because like the first thing they did, like when
• 1:16:10
  they check you in as they take your blood pressure and he was
• 1:16:14
  like, all right, we're just going to take your blood
• 1:16:16
  pressure real quick. I was like, all right, we'll
• 1:16:18
  just so you know, it's probably going to be really high.
• 1:16:20
  I was like, I was just in a car accident.
• 1:16:25
  So they did it and they're like, yes, it is very high.
• 1:16:27
  And I was like, yeah, it didn't surprise me.
• 1:16:30
  It was like 149 / 98 or some shit.
• 1:16:34
  It was up there. I don't know how the numbers.
• 1:16:38
  Were just for blood pressure. Normal is like 120 / 80.
• 1:16:44
  Yeah, yeah. I was going to say though that
• 1:16:48
  was a rookie numbers. That's why I was in the military
• 1:16:52
  with all the fucking stress. I actually had to have like go
• 1:16:57
  in fucking daily to the clinic to do like a blood pressure log
• 1:17:02
  because anytime I would go in for a normal checkup, they're
• 1:17:05
  like your blood pressure is like 172 over fucking 98 one O 1.
• 1:17:11
  That's a lot better. And I'm like, yeah, I'm fucking
• 1:17:14
  I know they're like, you feel OK.
• 1:17:17
  I was like, oh, I feel like shit, but I felt like shit for
• 1:17:19
  the past 10 years. So there's not really a good
• 1:17:23
  baseline there. Yeah, Jimmy, what the fuck is
• 1:17:33
  the deal with the shit you put in the topics section?
• 1:17:37
  Yeah. So if you ever guys, if you guys
• 1:17:47
  ever had that fart shut, you let out.
• 1:17:52
  And like depending on your positioning, you can feel the
• 1:17:57
  fart move through your butt crack or if you're sitting
• 1:18:03
  right, you can feel it go through the crack of your leg
• 1:18:06
  and, and through your through your balls and your thigh.
• 1:18:11
  Like you know what I'm talking about?
• 1:18:14
  Like it just feels like a Yeah. Like it feels like a.
• 1:18:18
  Bubble fucking rolls. Yeah, like what's that about?
• 1:18:22
  You know, like. It was like from this from
• 1:18:25
  swallowing your chewing gum as a child because.
• 1:18:28
  Like. That one my ass is sticky.
• 1:18:33
  Unrelated because like when I think of like a bubble.
• 1:18:37
  Like I think of water like you're, you're blowing a bubble
• 1:18:40
  underwater. Like you can see the bubble,
• 1:18:41
  right? There's no water, you know.
• 1:18:44
  So like, is there enough moisture to wear like, like
• 1:18:47
  'cause like you think that air or gas or whatever you want to
• 1:18:50
  call it would just flow through freely, but there's a bubble of
• 1:18:54
  it moving around. You can feel it.
• 1:18:56
  And if you and like, if you're really lucky and maybe this is
• 1:18:59
  autism, but sometimes, sometimes the bubble will get stuck at the
• 1:19:09
  tip of your butt cheeks. And if you pinch them together
• 1:19:13
  hard enough, it'll make a little sound as it pops out like I
• 1:19:18
  don't know if you guys have done that.
• 1:19:19
  Fuck. OK.
• 1:19:21
  So that is that just me or is that something you guys have
• 1:19:23
  done did? I see you think buddy.
• 1:19:30
  Did I just admit to doing something weird?
• 1:19:31
  I feel like Mike would do something like that.
• 1:19:41
  So you have me in the first half and then I don't know what the
• 1:19:46
  fuck just happened. I've never.
• 1:19:50
  I've never had the sphincter control to pop a fart bubble.
• 1:19:53
  It's gotten stuck between my. You don't you sorry.
• 1:19:58
  So listen, so so in the off chance that this happens to you
• 1:20:04
  guys in the near future and you remember this conversation
• 1:20:08
  sometimes depending on your position, like because you can
• 1:20:13
  feel the bubble move through the crack and stuff.
• 1:20:16
  But like, sometimes the bubble doesn't have anywhere to go, so
• 1:20:19
  it stays in there. So what you do is you just
• 1:20:22
  tighten your butt cheeks together really, really hard to
• 1:20:26
  force it out, and it makes a popping sound as it finally
• 1:20:30
  forces its way out. It's like a second fart.
• 1:20:42
  I think the best part of this whole conversation is you don't
• 1:20:45
  have headphones in and you were in a fucking hospital talking
• 1:20:49
  about this out loud. This is why the nurses haven't
• 1:20:54
  brought you any fucking water, Jimmy.
• 1:20:57
  It's like we're going to need some assistance, Susan.
• 1:21:00
  They're blowing fart. Bubbles.
• 1:21:13
  Jesus. I can't be the only one who's
• 1:21:16
  done that though, like I refuse. Fucking as of right now, you
• 1:21:22
  are. Maybe I'll find somebody and ask
• 1:21:26
  them just. Just randomly in the next car
• 1:21:31
  accident you get in, instead of asking if they're OK just go hey
• 1:21:34
  do you ever like feel the fart bubble come out of your ass and
• 1:21:37
  get stuck in your butt cheeks and then clench and pop it?
• 1:21:40
  Buddy, hopefully next time there is no car accident.
• 1:21:47
  You know what sucks and I just realized?
• 1:21:49
  About this one. I just, I just realized that I
• 1:21:52
  got 2 car seats in the car. Neither one of them are any good
• 1:21:56
  now. Yeah, because the thing about
• 1:21:58
  car seats is if you're in an accident, you cannot use them
• 1:22:01
  again. Yeah.
• 1:22:03
  So that sucks that I need a new car.
• 1:22:10
  I keep having waves of clarity. Dude.
• 1:22:14
  I, as I sit here in this hospital bed, I keep having
• 1:22:18
  moments of clarity where I just, I keep remembering that I don't
• 1:22:23
  have a car right now and I need to go get a new one.
• 1:22:28
  And I here let's look it up. Well see, here's the thing, you
• 1:22:32
  kind of fucked yourself because now you have to go and buy a
• 1:22:36
  Tesla because you said yourself that God saved you from the gas
• 1:22:41
  prices so you got to go electric.
• 1:22:44
  Now you have some a bitch. So my credit is not good.
• 1:22:53
  I my Equifax is 587 and my TransUnion is 623.
• 1:23:03
  I'm. Fucked.
• 1:23:06
  Like, I don't know what I'm going to do, boys.
• 1:23:10
  I'm pretty stressed. You know, it's pretty crazy.
• 1:23:16
  Like, don't get into car accidents if you can avoid it
• 1:23:22
  because you'll break your teeth. And that sucks.
• 1:23:29
  And like, yes, I'm sitting in this hospital, but the most
• 1:23:34
  painful part? Nope.
• 1:23:40
  Jimmy got a call and then his recording stopped.
• 1:23:44
  Hang on, let's see what happens. I'd.
• 1:23:48
  Say we just watched Jimmy disconnect from life in real
• 1:23:52
  time. Wow.
• 1:23:55
  That's morbid. Like that's alright.
• 1:24:00
  Well, that's that I've. Ever said?
• 1:24:03
  Nah Nah Nah. That's a that's a good segue
• 1:24:08
  though. Mandalorian and Grogu hits
• 1:24:10
  theaters May 22nd. I'm not excited for it.
• 1:24:14
  I'm going to be honest. It's been what, fucking three
• 1:24:19
  years since the last season? And it was ATV show?
• 1:24:25
  Yeah, it was ATV show. What the fuck are they making a
• 1:24:28
  movie like? It's stupid.
• 1:24:30
  So they can wrap. Another fucking season.
• 1:24:33
  They're not going to wrap it up, That's the thing.
• 1:24:35
  It's one of the most profitable fucking IPS right now.
• 1:24:41
  Yes, you are. Sorry, went on.
• 1:24:44
  Fucking Segway. I don't see your your dot
• 1:24:50
  though. Hang on, you're not recording.
• 1:24:54
  How is he not recording fuck all?
• 1:25:01
  Right buddy all. Right, dude, everybody.
• 1:25:13
  Fuck, that whole time he was in, he's not going to be in the
• 1:25:15
  episode. So Jimmy came back, He got a
• 1:25:17
  phone call. Yeah, he came back and
• 1:25:20
  apparently the getting a phone call killed his recording.
• 1:25:25
  So there's going to be a little bit of time there where we're
• 1:25:28
  talking about nothing and there's going to be weird
• 1:25:30
  pauses. But that's because Jimmy came
• 1:25:32
  back and it wasn't recording. And now he's is.
• 1:25:35
  Jimmy has left the chat. But like we said, hashtag
• 1:25:41
  thoughts and prayers spelled THOTS, obviously.
• 1:25:45
  Obviously to James Song. Yeah, hoping for a speedy
• 1:25:53
  recovery and hopefully not a fucking lawsuit.
• 1:25:57
  Why didn't my fucking GoPro just die?
• 1:26:00
  Oh. My God.
• 1:26:01
  Gavin, do you hear me still? I do, yes.
• 1:26:04
  That's a flattering fucking freeze frame too.
• 1:26:06
  It is, Yep. And I'm back.
• 1:26:12
  Hey, all right, I feel like this is a series of signs to wrap
• 1:26:17
  this the fuck up, but I. Was going to say like we 90% of
• 1:26:26
  this episode was talking about our fucking recap so we hadn't
• 1:26:29
  hit damn. We talked about fart bubbles.
• 1:26:34
  Aside from part. Yeah, well, let's continue down
• 1:26:37
  the The Mandalorian and Grogu movie rabbit hole and why you're
• 1:26:41
  not excited about it because it's been three years since
• 1:26:43
  they've released anything and it's ATV show and what the fuck
• 1:26:46
  are they even doing? Yeah, that's kind of my whole
• 1:26:50
  fucking thing. They're think they're just doing
• 1:26:52
  it for a task grab because they're going to do more
• 1:26:57
  Mandalorian Grogu like they're going to.
• 1:27:01
  So what are they going to do? Are they going to shift it
• 1:27:04
  strictly to a fucking movie thing where they're just
• 1:27:08
  releasing it in theaters, try and get money, or they're going
• 1:27:10
  to do this one off movie and then start putting out more
• 1:27:14
  seasons? Like what?
• 1:27:17
  It doesn't make sense. You know that wouldn't be the
• 1:27:19
  worst idea if you had a three-year break.
• 1:27:22
  Drop a movie to to reinvigorate the series and then go back into
• 1:27:27
  season 4. I don't think it's going to work
• 1:27:32
  the way they want it to because it's already.
• 1:27:35
  It's already projected to make like fucking 8485 million at the
• 1:27:42
  box office, which was lower than the Solo movie that they did.
• 1:27:47
  Like you remember fucking Han Solo's prequel movie bullshit
• 1:27:51
  didn't. Watch it.
• 1:27:52
  That was the worst performing movie that they've ever done
• 1:27:55
  with Star Wars. Yeah.
• 1:27:59
  So I, I think it's probably going to kill it in all honesty.
• 1:28:10
  Yeah, I hope not, but I think you you might not be wrong on
• 1:28:15
  that one. And I don't think I'm going to
• 1:28:20
  go see it in theaters because I know it's going to fucking drop
• 1:28:23
  on streaming in a couple of months anyways.
• 1:28:26
  So. Yeah.
• 1:28:29
  Yeah, although I know my dad's going to listen to this and he's
• 1:28:33
  going to be pissed. I don't want to go and see it
• 1:28:35
  with him. He's.
• 1:28:37
  Going to drag your ass to the theater.
• 1:28:38
  Fucking probably. So you're.
• 1:28:40
  Going to be part of that $84 million?
• 1:28:45
  Unfortunately. Yeah.
• 1:28:49
  It's funny, we were just we're just talking last weekend that
• 1:28:55
  if we're talking about like fucking cash grabs and thanks
• 1:28:58
  that marvel is re releasing end game in theaters in September
• 1:29:05
  because they're going to add an extra like they're going to be
• 1:29:10
  replacing scenes in it. They're going to add like an
• 1:29:13
  extra 30 minutes into the movie to tie the ending directly into
• 1:29:19
  Avengers doomsday. That's coming out December
• 1:29:23
  because it's been six years. That's end game, 2 marble phases
• 1:29:28
  that kind of led to nowhere. So they're like, we're going to
• 1:29:32
  do this, reshoot a bunch of stuff and tie it directly into
• 1:29:37
  Doomsday and make it super important.
• 1:29:40
  And I was like, this fucking cash grab.
• 1:29:43
  Am I going to fall for it? Fucking probably.
• 1:29:46
  But it's like it's you. Guys know this is an ambush,
• 1:29:50
  right? Are we still going to walk into
• 1:29:52
  it? I mean, yeah, but you know, this
• 1:29:54
  is a fucking ambush, yeah. Yeah, that's exactly a thing.
• 1:29:57
  So I'm I'm definitely a hypocrite, however is what it
• 1:30:02
  is. Yeah, I probably won't see it in
• 1:30:07
  theaters because I have two kids and no free time.
• 1:30:09
  And the free time I do have is eaten up by doing this podcast,
• 1:30:15
  which I am super OK with. I would.
• 1:30:20
  Love for you to drag Ridley to it so that she can get obsessed
• 1:30:27
  with the fucking Grogu and then that just invade.
• 1:30:29
  You. She already is.
• 1:30:32
  When? So Jenna will say Baby Yoda and
• 1:30:34
  Ridley will correct her. Oh God, yeah, she's, she's
• 1:30:40
  fucking all about that shit. But I mean she is at that age
• 1:30:46
  where you could start taking her to the movies and let her ruin
• 1:30:49
  the other people's movie going experience.
• 1:30:55
  Yeah, yeah, I could. You know what she fucking said
• 1:30:57
  the other day? We're down here and doing music
• 1:30:59
  stuff and she's fucking around with the MIDI controller because
• 1:31:02
  it has keys on it. Yep.
• 1:31:05
  And she looks right up there and walks over to that light switch
• 1:31:11
  right there and just fucking turns it off.
• 1:31:15
  And he goes, Dad let's lightsaber fight, talking about
• 1:31:23
  the fucking good lightsabers up there.
• 1:31:25
  And I'm like, ah fuck. That they're.
• 1:31:28
  That's great idea. But they are specifically hung
• 1:31:33
  all the way up there so she can't fuck with them.
• 1:31:37
  No, I put them all the way up there for a fucking reason, so
• 1:31:40
  that I couldn't get drunk and have an intrusive thought and
• 1:31:43
  get them down easily. I would look up there and go
• 1:31:48
  fuck, it's going to be a pain in the ass now.
• 1:31:52
  I guess I'll just beat my Dick. I'm not staying in that bedroom
• 1:31:59
  when I come and visit you. I don't do it in here.
• 1:32:06
  That was a Segway. Oh God, I don't know what you're
• 1:32:12
  talking about. We doing this?
• 1:32:15
  I don't even know what the fuck we're doing.
• 1:32:19
  Are you a Are you a shower beater, a toilet beater or an in
• 1:32:23
  bed beater? I'm an in bed beater.
• 1:32:26
  I'm lazy man. I'm not going to do that shit
• 1:32:28
  standing up. Train how you fight dog.
• 1:32:37
  Elaborate, but do. Are you a lazy fuck?
• 1:32:44
  No, but the majority of the fucking I do is on the bed.
• 1:32:50
  With you standing or. Like in in the bed?
• 1:33:00
  So. Like here's the thing, I got bad
• 1:33:03
  knees. So we're doing missionary, it's
• 1:33:05
  on the fucking bed. We're doing doggy, it's still on
• 1:33:08
  the fucking bed. So I can have some cushion on my
• 1:33:10
  knees, you know, if they're faced now I'm fucking going from
• 1:33:16
  my end. Up.
• 1:33:18
  Why? I mean yes, I do stand up
• 1:33:21
  occasionally in it, but I'm not going to be standing the whole
• 1:33:27
  fucking time just having them hang off the edge of the bed.
• 1:33:29
  Like so you exclusively fuck. Just like on the edge of the bed
• 1:33:40
  standing the entire time. No, no.
• 1:33:44
  Then why are you giving me shit about it?
• 1:33:47
  Because I don't lay down and Jack my Dick into a sock.
• 1:33:51
  I don't Jack my Dick into a sock.
• 1:33:55
  That's like a teenage boy shit. No, I nut on the sheets and then
• 1:33:59
  go to bed like a man. Yeah, Yeah.
• 1:34:03
  That's gross. Yucky, there's coming here.
• 1:34:09
  No, I am a man of culture so obviously I have one of those
• 1:34:13
  turbo Dick blaster 3 thousands that has the handles on the side
• 1:34:18
  that look like fucking fence post pushers and I just sit on
• 1:34:22
  my Dick. I'm just holding on for dear
• 1:34:25
  life. Well that was a mental image I
• 1:34:39
  never fucking wanted. So for the fucking listeners,
• 1:34:44
  obviously I don't have something like that.
• 1:34:46
  I feel like that is way is that. Obvious.
• 1:34:47
  Is that obvious? I.
• 1:34:49
  Feel like that's way above and beyond when you just have your
• 1:34:53
  fucking hand. However, when I was in the
• 1:34:56
  military, I knew a guy that had one of those fucking things.
• 1:35:03
  They had like the handles and shit on the side and he showed
• 1:35:05
  it to me one time. It looked like it looked like
• 1:35:08
  something fucking futuristic, like it looked like an alien
• 1:35:11
  civilization fucking made it and dropped it down on earth in a
• 1:35:15
  fucking pod. And I was like, why alien fuck
• 1:35:18
  would you ever need something like this?
• 1:35:24
  Yeah, the aliens built that right after they built the
• 1:35:26
  fucking pyramids. Exactly.
• 1:35:29
  You guys are going to need this. I'm like 1700 years, just trust
• 1:35:34
  us. I I never handled it but it
• 1:35:37
  looked like a pain in the ass to clean.
• 1:35:40
  Also, I was like, I would never want to deal with something like
• 1:35:44
  that. Yeah, yeah, that's honestly like
• 1:35:51
  my #1 consideration for shit like that.
• 1:35:54
  And the number one reason I don't have anything like that
• 1:35:57
  because I'm like, how the fuck am I going to clean that?
• 1:36:00
  Yeah. It's like I I know what the end
• 1:36:04
  state is and what's going to be inside that thing.
• 1:36:08
  So I that's yucky. We'll say dating a girl one time
• 1:36:14
  she was really big into toys and things like that.
• 1:36:17
  So I have used something along that type of thing before, used
• 1:36:23
  it once and I was like, this is pretty fucking awful.
• 1:36:27
  Like the end state was awful, doing everything.
• 1:36:30
  I was like, I, I don't think I can like that so.
• 1:36:39
  Yeah, that's fair. Yeah, plus I feel like it's very
• 1:36:47
  stigmatized. You know, girls, they have a
• 1:36:50
  whole fucking core of shit. Got it.
• 1:36:53
  Organized and fucking sides. If a guy has a sex toy, they're
• 1:36:58
  creepy. They're weirdo.
• 1:36:59
  Like there's something wrong with them.
• 1:37:05
  Which I think it fair considering one of the like more
• 1:37:09
  popular ones right now is literally just like a fucking
• 1:37:11
  torso and then ass. I'm like, yeah, OK, that's kind
• 1:37:15
  of fucking weird. Like I get it.
• 1:37:18
  Yeah, I was going to say, I think it definitely depends on
• 1:37:22
  the sex toy. Yeah, I don't really think
• 1:37:28
  there's like a good sex story for guys.
• 1:37:31
  They're all just kind of fucking weird.
• 1:37:35
  I think the Prostate Obliterator 9000 is probably the only one.
• 1:37:43
  You can find that on www.adamandsteve.com.
• 1:37:49
  That's the one that has a Bluetooth so anybody can fucking
• 1:37:52
  sync to it and send you some shit.
• 1:37:55
  So it's actually it's Bluetooth, but it syncs to the kick drum
• 1:37:59
  when you play Lorna Shore. I don't think you're making it
• 1:38:06
  through that one, but I'm sorry. Can't you imagine that
• 1:38:15
  conversation? Yeah, Austin.
• 1:38:18
  Archie made me cum. What?
• 1:38:21
  Fucking what? Go away, Sean.
• 1:38:28
  I'm talking to Steve. You know, eventually we'll have
• 1:38:37
  an episode where we don't talk about come again.
• 1:38:40
  But clearly this was not it. Yeah, we're off.
• 1:38:43
  I'm less sorry right now. Oh, and two, I guess.
• 1:38:48
  I need to I need to have a a fucking whiteboard back there.
• 1:38:51
  Just a come calendar. Episode since we've talked about
• 1:38:55
  come, it's just always at 0. It's like the the fucking almost
• 1:39:07
  like the days since an Ari incident at my old command Bitch
• 1:39:14
  never got above like 27. No, no, no, it never does.
• 1:39:20
  That's a secret gap. Well, you got anything else for
• 1:39:28
  this shit show of episode 20, Gavin?
• 1:39:41
  No, but I'm really upset we only got through the fucking fart
• 1:39:44
  bubbles thing because I wanted to know what the hell the ups
• 1:39:47
  and downs thing. We'll save that for next week.
• 1:39:55
  No, I think, I think we've got to turn this into a proper shit
• 1:39:59
  show. So.
• 1:40:01
  Yeah, well, I mean, Jimmy literally called.
• 1:40:04
  Him from the fucking hospital. So yeah, which 100% was not
• 1:40:10
  fucking expecting because no, I knew it was going to be a bad
• 1:40:14
  idea for him to do that. That's why I said don't fucking
• 1:40:17
  do it. He did it anyways.
• 1:40:21
  He's. Talking about fart bubbles at
• 1:40:23
  the fucking. Hospital and ripping everything
• 1:40:27
  out and off of his body. You know the shit that's there
• 1:40:31
  just in case something was wrong with him after getting into a
• 1:40:36
  fucking car accident. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:40:42
  Doctors walk in, he's fucking crashing, but they can't throw
• 1:40:45
  away any fucking meds into them. Fuck, just got to hit him with a
• 1:40:51
  fast one. Now at that point you just do a
• 1:40:55
  fucking IO and he has to live with that pain.
• 1:41:00
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, All right. Well, Jimmy already had our
• 1:41:09
  fourth damn dude for this week, which was his buddy whose name I
• 1:41:14
  already fucking forgot 'cause I'm a piece of shit.
• 1:41:16
  I'm a terrible host. As I say, think of think about
• 1:41:21
  it real hard because it's the name you're familiar with,
• 1:41:25
  Francois. Think of all your musical
• 1:41:31
  equipment that grew legs. Fender I.
• 1:41:38
  Fucking. Swear to God.
• 1:41:40
  You sure you don't have a fucking concussion too?
• 1:41:43
  Buddy, I probably had at least one at some point.
• 1:41:49
  I'm going. To say I'm going to say this
• 1:41:50
  super confidently and then get fucking flamed if I'm wrong when
• 1:41:54
  the episode comes out, but I'm like 90% sure it was Jake that
• 1:41:59
  was his buddy's name. Yeah, maybe that could be.
• 1:42:05
  I don't fucking. Remember, fuck it.
• 1:42:08
  But yeah, that's our fourth damn dude of the week for being an
• 1:42:11
  absolute fucking bro. And that really highlights the
• 1:42:15
  importance of checking in on your buddies.
• 1:42:17
  Checking in on the boys, the dudes, the goons, the the fellas
• 1:42:20
  and the the ladies that you went through the suck with.
• 1:42:23
  Just from time to time make sure they're still breathing because
• 1:42:26
  you never know, you could be passing an intersection where
• 1:42:29
  they just got T boned by a lady who is now in the same hospital
• 1:42:32
  as they are. Yeah, and we're going to do a
• 1:42:35
  little special shout out and do something a little bit different
• 1:42:38
  tonight. Well, we did a fourth.
• 1:42:40
  Damn dude where you're going to do A minus?
• 1:42:44
  Damn dude has a fucking Karen that hit him.
• 1:42:48
  Fuck that bitch. Yeah, I mean, even if it's not
• 1:42:54
  your fault, if you don't have the basic human decency to make
• 1:42:56
  sure that everybody's fucking OK, go fuck yourself.
• 1:43:00
  Yeah, 100%. Especially if they're currently
• 1:43:04
  asking you if you were fucking OK.
• 1:43:07
  Yeah, I'm trying. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:43:10
  You know, your sign off is normally like, don't be an
• 1:43:12
  asshole. Yeah, yeah, just don't be a
• 1:43:14
  fucking. Asshole, don't be an asshole.
• 1:43:16
  It's really not that fucking hard.
• 1:43:19
  This is coming from a grade A asshole.
• 1:43:28
  Coming from a certified card carrying asshole.
• 1:43:30
  Don't be an asshole there's. My fucking wallet.
• 1:43:33
  Hold on one SEC. Oh fine, Gavin's offcom's going
• 1:43:40
  to get his fucking wallet and he's almost back.
• 1:43:47
  Let's see, the headphones are coming back up.
• 1:43:50
  No, now he looks confused and angry.
• 1:43:54
  Let's just Yep. Hey, welcome back.
• 1:43:59
  Hey, I am back because I'm doing it for a bit.
• 1:44:04
  That you will appreciate. Wallet in the wallet.
• 1:44:16
  Assholes live forever. I'm a card carrying member.
• 1:44:23
  Yeah, yeah. We're not going to talk about
• 1:44:25
  what set that card is a part of, and we're just going to leave it
• 1:44:31
  at that. If you know, you know.
• 1:44:32
  If you know, you know. All right, so with that, this
• 1:44:39
  has been episode fucking 20 of the Three DM Dudes podcast.
• 1:44:47
  We fucking love you guys. We appreciate you guys and
• 1:44:52
  honestly, truly from the bottom of whatever is inside of me that
• 1:44:57
  keeps me going because I don't think it's my heart anymore.
• 1:45:01
  That hurts, but true. Thanks for tuning in every week.
• 1:45:07
  Thanks for showing up. And if you've met you, if you've
• 1:45:12
  made it this far, you've stuck with us through this journey
• 1:45:16
  they can then made to episode 20.
• 1:45:19
  Don't jerk your Dick today. You deserve it.
• 1:45:23
  We appreciate you. Go crank that hog courtesy of
• 1:45:31
  the three damn dudes. Podcast out.