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Boundaries CTF School of Ministry #3 · Mental Health and the Mission of the Church

• 0:30
  SPEAKER_02: Can I get two volunteers to come up and pray for Chip?
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_02: Anna?
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_02: Come on.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_02: Somebody else.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_02: Tulia.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_02: You want to come pray?
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, I'll pray.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, Father, we just thank you for for what Chip carries and the message that you've placed in his heart, God.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: Father, would you just come and just bring an increase to that, Father?
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_02: He's not done yet, Lord.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_02: You have so much more for him, so many more places you want to take him, and just so many more levels that you want to bring him to, God.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_02: Would you just continue to pour into him, God, and to just lead him in that destiny that you have for him?
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: Hallelujah.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Jesus, thank you so much for Chip.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: Shua Senior.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, thank you, Father, for his words.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Lord, that um yeah, the power of life and death is in the tongue and you bring so much life.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Father.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: He's gonna um just see lots of things falling off today.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: Wrong ideas, false beliefs.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah, and and people just emerging uh stronger and working ahead into destiny.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you so much, Father, for his message.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for his life, which is his message, and we just pray blessing on him and his wife, and their family in Jesus' name.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: Lord, we just thank you so much for chip and Father, we just ask that you would have our hearts be receptive to the words that he's speaking, that we would be open to what you're speaking through him, Holy Spirit.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: God, we just ask that you would flow through him today, and we thank you so much for sending your representative to speak to us.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: In your name we pray, amen.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_02: Thanks, guys.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_03: Over to you, Chip.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_03: How y'all doing this morning?
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_03: Can I make an observation for you?
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_03: Is that all right?
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_03: If I meddle a little bit?
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um, like when he says, Will a couple of volunteers come pray?
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_03: Let me use that as a little example of what happens.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_03: You hear a voice inside of you saying, I want to do that, but then you look around to see how it's gonna land on everybody.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_03: In other words, listen to me now, this is really, really important.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to decide which voice, which opinion is gonna matter the most to you, the one inside you or the ones outside of you.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_03: You understand what I'm saying?
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_03: Because in that moment, you have to decide how, because here's what you're doing.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_03: You're deciding whether how everyone else is gonna perceive you is more important than what you hear that little voice inside of you saying.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_03: Say yes, if that makes sense.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_03: You're sort of managing other people's opinion of you instead of managing your own opinion of you.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like here's a thought I had last night.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know where I get these weird thoughts.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_03: Well, yeah, I probably do if they're good ones.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_03: Listen to this simple thought.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_03: You need to quit listening to yourself and start talking to yourself.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_03: That sounds kind of weird, but it's a very, very important thought.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_03: You need to stop listening to yourself.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_03: That's passive and robotic.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_03: You need to start talking to yourself.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_03: That's aggressive or assertive and proactive.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_03: What most of us do is we, whatever's in there, we just kind of listen to it and let it steer us.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_03: And a lot of the stuff that's in there, you don't want to go where it's gonna take you.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_03: So you've got to stop listening to what's there and start talking to what's there.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_03: Because if you James chapter 3 talks about the tongue being like the bit in a horse's mouth and like the rudder of a ship, what does that mean?
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_03: What a crazy thing for God to say.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_03: That your tongue steers your life.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_03: It's really, really important that you think about the words that you allow to run in your head.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: And what one of the things you could learn to do while you're up here is how to monitor it, in other words, be aware of it, and then manage it.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I don't like where those words are taking me.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_03: I don't like where they've taken me in the past.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm gonna exchange them and I'm gonna choose other words.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna say other words.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_03: So stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_03: Now I had another thought I want to share with you.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_03: Um I we talked about this yesterday, and um you know, one of the reasons I love to come up here, one of the reasons it is absolutely one of my favorite places on earth and one of my favorite weeks of the year, other than the fact that my wife's not with me.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_03: But one of the things I love is I get people in counseling settings when they're 30, 40, 50 years old.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you know their life's already on a track that has a lot of moving parts?
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_03: They're already married, they already have kids, they've already committed to life, career choices, and all that kind of stuff.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_03: One of the things I love and I pray and I'm I'm passionate about when I come up here to be with you guys is what do you think I see when I look at you guys?
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: It begins with a P.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_03: Potential.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_03: Whoever said that, very smart, very quick.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_03: Potential.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_03: You know what potential is?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_03: Potential is this programmed piece of passion and purpose.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_03: It's programmed, it has everything inside of it to produce this amazing life of passion and purpose.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_03: Everything's there waiting.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_03: But whether you like it or not, whether you think it's fair or not, whether you would like it to be some other way or not, here's the deal: nobody can turn the on switch but you.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody can flip it but you.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_03: God Himself won't flip that switch to say, I want that.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_03: Remember yesterday we read about blind Bartimaeus, and he pitched a fit, stop Jesus.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_03: And Jesus said, bring him over here, stood in front of him, and Jesus, the wisest man that ever walked earth, God in the flesh, looked at a blind beggar.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_03: Do you remember what he said?
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_03: What do you want?
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_03: What do you want me to do for you?
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_03: I play with words.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_03: I'm a word freak.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_03: I can preach out of the dictionary.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_03: I just love words.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_03: Because words are pregnant with potential when used properly.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: You're pregnant, fellas, you two, you're pregnant with potential.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_03: The seed of the destiny of God.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_03: And it contains your marriage, it contains your purpose, it contains your career, it contains your children and how you parent them.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_03: It contains this amazing journey called life.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_03: But one of the things you've got to do is you've got to have courage.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_03: And you know what?
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_03: One of the first things you've got to have the courage to do is admit to yourself I want something.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to, how many of you know it takes courage to do that?
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_03: Because how many of you know until you admit you want it, you sort of subconsciously think you won't be disappointed if you don't get it.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_03: But once you go on record, I want that, now you can be hurt.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_03: Now you can be disappointed.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_03: I beg you guys, I beg you guys with everything that's in me.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_03: Wrestle through your fears to where you can say to yourself and God, if nobody else, I want X, Y, Z.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_03: I want whatever.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to find that.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to be able to say, I want an amazing marriage.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_03: If you're a guy, I want an amazing wife.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_03: I want to be an amazing husband.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_03: I want to be if I'm a lady, I want an amazing husband.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_03: I want an amazing, I want to be an amazing wife.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: You gotta want, I want an amazing relationship with God.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_03: I want to be healed from all the things that hold me back.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_03: You gotta be able to say, I want stuff.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_03: Because it awakens something in you.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_03: Do you know there's a part of your brain, one of my little hobbies right now is to study the brain, because I think it's one of the last frontiers in this process of change.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_03: Sometimes people say, Well, you know, what what what how would you quickly describe your ministry?
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_03: I would say this to you I'm a metamorphologist.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_03: What is metamorphosis?
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_03: The process of change or transformation.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_03: What is anologist?
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_03: Someone who studies.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_03: I am a student of change.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_03: I've spent 35 years of my life, maybe even longer, I don't know.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_03: And what I study, pray about, read about, go to scripture, notice in stories, I'm just I just think about how can I help a person change.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_03: Forgive me if I spit on you.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_03: How can I help a person change?
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_03: Now, here's as I progress, I've I've started to study the brain, because the brain's part of what makes it harder for us to change.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_03: But there's a part of your brain, not to impress you, it's called the reticular activating system.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_03: The RAS, if you ever catch that.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_03: The reticular activating system.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_03: Well, guess what it does?
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_03: The reticular activating system waits for you to give it instructions.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_03: And once you give it instructions, it takes off to follow your instructions.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_03: For instance, when you tell it what you want, it sets itself from that point forward till you tell it differently.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: It goes about figuring out how to get you what you want.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_03: And it starts watching its environment, noticing that will help.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_03: That will hurt.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_03: That will help.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_03: But if you listen now, if you don't tell it what you want, it doesn't know what to look for.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_03: But if you tell it what you want, this is this is a part of your brain that functions subconsciously.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_03: Below the conscious line of thought.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_03: Once you tell it what you want, it just slowly but surely stays on task trying to get you what you want.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_03: Now, most of us have default settings, and we're going to talk about that in just a second.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_03: And it says things like this I want to be safe.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_03: I don't want to be hurt.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: I don't want to be rejected.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_03: And so your reticular activating system goes around and makes sure you're safe and protected.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_03: And guess what?
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_03: You get nothing but the scraps from the table of life.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_03: But if you can wrestle through, get with God and figure out what do you want, and say it out loud.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: Write it in your journal.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_03: Listen, the pastor I got saved under 35 years ago said something I'll never forget.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so grateful to him for so many things, but this is one of them.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_03: He said this you say the truth until you believe it.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_03: Then you say it because you believe it.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_03: Faith comes by hearing.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_03: You say the truth until you believe it.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_03: Then you say it because you believe it.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_03: So how do you start out wanting something?
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_03: How do you get to where you believe it?
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_03: But what if I have resistance?
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_03: But what if it doesn't feel right?
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_03: But what if I don't even believe it yet?
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_03: Because faith comes.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_03: Faith comes.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_03: It wasn't there.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_03: Now it is there.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_03: Faith comes by hearing.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_03: Whose words do you hear more than anybody else's?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but when I say it, it just doesn't feel real.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_03: Say it.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_03: Do me a favor.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_03: Put your pen in your opposite hand.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_03: And say, I mean, right, I'm sorry.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_03: Change feels funny.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_03: Does it or not?
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_03: Now, what did you just do?
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_03: Change feels funny.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_03: What you just experienced is what happens when you go against your programming.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_03: What you just experience is what it feels like when you go against your programming.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_03: So listen to me.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_03: When you start admitting to yourself, I want to live an amazing life, your programming might be you're not amazing.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_03: You're not even ordinary.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_03: You're sub whatever.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_03: And then you start saying, I'm an extraordinary person.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_03: I'm unique.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_03: I'm wonderful.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_03: I'm awesome.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_03: Why am I that way?
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_03: Because God said so.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_03: When you do that, what's it going to feel like?
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_03: It's going to feel like writing with the wrong hand.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_03: Until you start believing it.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_03: But at first, it's going to feel awkward.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_03: Let me give you a little play on words here.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_03: Saying the truth before you believe it is not pretending.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_03: It's practicing.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_03: Saying the truth before you believe it is not pretending, it's practicing.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_03: How do you get good at anything?
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_03: Practice.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_03: How are you going to get good at being nice to yourself?
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_03: Practice.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_03: And you've got to do it before it feels right.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_03: It just feels awkward to be nice to myself.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_03: Because you don't deserve it?
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_03: Because you're just not accustomed to it.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_03: You're not used to it.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_03: So you got to practice at it.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_03: I encourage you guys, I beg you guys, use these months you're up here.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_03: By the time you leave here, your journal should be full of amazing encounters with God and amazing encounters with yourself.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_03: Where you've learned to say things to yourself you never thought would come easily.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_03: We'll talk more about this as we get into boundaries.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_03: I do want to flitter around a minute here before we get into that.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_03: I love this simple thought.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_03: I picked it up from a book.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_03: Every revolution is built around a core set of ideas.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_03: Every revolution is built around a core set of ideas.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I travel around the church, and by the grace of God, I'm so grateful for this.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_03: I get into lots of different environments.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_03: I go to churches that are wide open to the things of God.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_03: I go to churches that you know would run you out if they even knew you were from here.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_03: I go into all kinds of churches.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_03: And here's the good news, bad news, whatever you want to call it.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_03: There are things you're learning up here that are not common in the church.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, if that makes sense.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_03: Believe it or not, something as simple as journaling, simple as the way you're learning to journal.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_03: Mark Verkler came right.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_03: He's a good friend of mine from Buffalo, like I was.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_03: But the things you're learning are not common out there.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_03: They're very important.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_03: The father's love.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_03: Healing life's hurts.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_03: What's the fourth one?
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_03: Prophetic activation, I guess they used to call it.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_03: All of that stuff is not common.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_03: My point is, every revolution is built around a core set of ideas.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_03: You have an opportunity to allow God to work in your core, a set of ideas that you're going to have to learn to defend.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_03: Not defend in an aggressive, argumentative way, but defend in the sense that I want to protect them and keep them vital and alive.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: By God's mercy and grace, of course, I pastored my own church, so I infused these things into our culture.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_03: So I protected my walk in this way by making it a part of our culture.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_03: The majority of you guys sitting here, you're not going to have the privilege of doing that.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_03: You're not going to have the privilege of establishing the culture.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_03: You're going to have to go back to a culture that probably doesn't have these values.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_03: So you're going to have to learn to protect them.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_03: And you've got to get them all that you can get them inside of you and working and strong.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_03: So just to kind of make you think a little bit, say think one time.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_03: I love to get you to think.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_03: We tried to raise our kids to think for themselves.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_03: A lot of people are afraid of people who think for themselves.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_03: Because people who think tend to be troublemakers.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you want to be a troublemaker?
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_03: I do.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_03: I want to be a troublemaker.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_03: I want to be an upsetter, a provoker.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_03: I'd rather make you mad, glad, or sad than leave you unfazed.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_03: Rather cause a reaction.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_03: Any of you ever do any boating, you know, out in the water boating?
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_03: You go through some areas and they have a little sign and it says no-wake zone.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_03: Boats at the dock, and we don't want you to cause any waves.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_03: I beg you guys, don't live your life in a no-wake zone.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_03: Live your life in a no-wake zone.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_03: Don't you want to leave some boats rocking behind you after you've passed?
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_03: Don't you want to be upsetting, unsettling?
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_03: Don't you want your life and the way you live it to make other people kind of go, hmm?
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_03: Never really thought of it that way.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_03: Wouldn't that be cool?
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_03: Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_03: What I've learned about this cool stuff that you guys are experiencing, kind of sort of a teeny bit of good news, bad news again.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_03: I don't care how many experiences you have in the presence of God and God doing cool things to you.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_03: This is my opinion.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_03: Throw it out if you don't like it.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_03: But here's what I believe, no matter how many amazing, like you know, uh phenomenal experiences you have with God.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_03: You feel stuff, you cry, you laugh, whatever.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_03: You fall down, flop around, whatever.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_03: I've done it all.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the thing I've learned.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_03: Until you can put into words what God has done for you, you will not retain it.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_03: Until you can put into words what God has done for you, you will not retain it.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_03: Words, containers, shapers, formers, framers.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_03: Words are amazingly powerful.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_03: So when you have an encounter with God, journal about it.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_03: What was that?
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: What were you saying to me?
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_03: What were you doing to me?
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_03: What were you dealing with in my heart?
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_03: Because when you can put it into words, when you can put it into your Words, you own it.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_03: It belongs to you.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was teaching on journaling at my church, I don't know, sometime last year, I can't remember now.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_03: And just to make a point, I just went, I I didn't, I don't have my journal with me down here, but uh I I I'm just into journals.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_03: I like cool ones, you know.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: I can, you know, whatever.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_03: I my wife's like, dude, don't buy any more journals.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_03: I got like a whole drawer full of journals.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just kind of weird.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_03: But what I do is every year or whenever I need to, I start a new one.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_03: But even if I'm not finished with it, I start a new one the next year.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_03: And I was teaching on journaling at my church, so I brought my like 2000 to 2010 journals.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_03: And I just showed them and read a little bit.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_03: And it was amazing as I revisited it to watch the places in my journey where God had just infused new chunks of reality into my life.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_03: And I realized that just the act of penning it onto paper made it more real to me.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_03: And it made it something that I could revisit and rehearse and respeak.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_03: I even go back sometimes, I'll take a journal, like last year maybe I took a journal and I'll take a highlighter, and I'll just slowly kind of read through my journal.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I remember days that just weren't that big a deal, so I don't have to read every word.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_03: But I'll go back and I'll highlight key words or phrases.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_03: And that just makes them more real and alive in my soul.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_03: And I've been doing this for almost 25 years.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_03: I'm telling you, you guys are learning some amazingly cool stuff.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_03: Now, to get you to think a little bit, we're gonna jump into boundaries here in just a second, but I just want to get you to think a little bit.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_03: Remember what I said a minute ago?
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_03: Every revolution is built around a core set of ideas.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you would agree with this thought?
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_03: The church isn't necessarily doing the greatest job imaginable.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_03: Raise your hand if you agree with that.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I don't mean that critically.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_03: I'm a pastor of a church, etc., etc.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_03: But how many of you think 2,000 years post-Calvary, we just don't really seem sometimes like we've made as much progress as we should have?
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_03: Is that a fair way to put it?
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I believe God's a God of progression and you know, little by little, and incrementalism, I like to use that word.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_03: But sometimes we've got to we've got to back up and rethink some stuff.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_03: So a while back, I don't know, sometime last year, I was probably getting ready to speak somewhere, and I just wanted to, okay, God, help me help me say this in a fresh way.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_03: And I felt like God dropped this kind of, but actually, I remember now, it was a book.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_03: Uh the book was called A Community Called Atonement.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_03: Really good book.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_03: Not an easy read, but worth the read.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_03: Very good book.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_03: A community called Atonement.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_03: I cannot remember the guy's name.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_03: Might be Andy Crouch.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_03: Might not be.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_03: That doesn't sound right.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um that's gonna bother me now, but whatever.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the thing he said in his book.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_03: He said, How you define a problem shapes your solution to the problem.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_03: How you define a problem shapes your solution.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_03: And then here's what he went on to say.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_03: How you define sin shapes your solution to sin.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_03: How you define a problem shapes your solution.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_03: How you define sin shapes your solution to sin.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_03: And then he said this how you define sin shapes the gospel you preach.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_03: And then the gospel you preach shapes the church that you build.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_03: Now that's a fascinating string of logic.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_03: How you define the problem shapes your solution.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_03: How you shape your solution determines the way you preach the gospel, and then the gospel you preach shapes the churches that we build.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_03: Now, why did I say all that?
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_03: Because I think if you start wrong, you can't help but be off track the whole way.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_03: And I think we're a bit off track.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I just want to throw some thoughts at you.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you would agree that Easter was a big deal?
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_03: Was Easter a pretty big deal?
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_03: What was Easter about?
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_03: Who was it about?
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_03: It's about Jesus.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_03: Pretty big deal.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_03: Now, here's just a way God took me through some thinking.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_03: What problem did Easter solve?
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you agree Easter solved a problem?
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_03: So what problem did it solve?
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_03: Alright, sin sounds good, but that's too general.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_03: Let me, to not take too much time, let me take you where I went.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_03: And if you want to, go there.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_03: Genesis chapter 3.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_03: The problem God was trying to solve, not trying, the problem God did solve was Genesis chapter 3.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_03: So if you look in Genesis 3, what you find is the fall.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: That's where the serpent came, tempted Eve, and off we go.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_03: And we'll talk more about that in the boundaries teaching.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: But here's where I want to get to.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_03: We were disconnected from God.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_03: God said, if you eat of the tree, you shall surely what?
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_03: Die.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_03: Did they fall over dead?
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_03: So I don't believe we died in the sense of our physical being, but we died where?
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_03: In our spirits, and I believe a key thought is we were disconnected from God.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_03: Very important thought.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_03: Because what that produced in us is a very important word.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: Independence.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_03: Independence.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_03: So now here we are, disconnected from God, but we still have the same needs that we had before.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_03: We still need love.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_03: We still need encouragement.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_03: We still need affection.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_03: We still need all these other things.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_03: But guess what?
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_03: We can't get them from God anymore.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_03: So what are we going to do?
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_03: We're going to look to other sources.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_03: Instead of looking inside, we begin to look outside.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_03: And we're disconnected from God.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_03: So we're disconnected, we're independent, and we're derailed, if you will, and that's kind of a real weird word, but we're derailed from our assignment.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you know back there in Genesis, God gave us an assignment?
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_03: He said, Be fruitful, multiply, replenish the earth, and subdue it.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_03: So all the way back there in Genesis, we were disconnected from God.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_03: We now have to figure out how to get our needs met on our own, and we are derailed from our assignment.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_03: Is that a big deal?
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, because in my opinion, Genesis 3 is what Easter's trying to fix.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I believe we came out of Genesis 3 with what I call a new set of default settings.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_03: What does default mean?
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_03: Without any effort put forth, this is where we land.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_03: This is our natural place we land.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_03: And if you look at Genesis 3, verse 10, to a guy like me, a counselor type guy, Genesis 3.10 is possibly the most important verse in the entire Bible.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_03: If you haven't ever looked at it, turn there if you would.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_03: Because I want you to see it and hopefully become very, very, very, very familiar with it.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_03: What problem was Easter solving?
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_03: I believe it was solving Genesis 3.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_03: And what happened in Genesis 3?
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_03: We were profoundly shaken from our source, and it produced three default settings.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_03: Genesis 3.10 says this.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_03: Remember somewhere about verse 8, God came looking for them to go on their nice little afternoon walk in the cool of the day.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_03: And they were hiding.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_03: And God said, Where are you?
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_03: And then Adam said, What did he say in verse 10?
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_03: What's the first part?
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_03: I heard your voice in the garden.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_03: And then he says, This I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_03: What are the new default settings?
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_03: I believe they're fear, shame, and isolation.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_03: Fear, shame, and isolation.
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_03: And why do I think that's like crazy important?
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_03: Because how you define a problem shapes your solution.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever your solution is shapes the gospel you preach.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_03: And the gospel you preach shapes the churches we build.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_03: I believe this is the problem Easter's trying to fix.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_03: Fear, shame, and isolation.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_03: What's the number one fear people have?
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_03: Public speaking, but it's really a form of another one.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_03: You're right, whoever said that.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_03: But it begins with an R.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_03: The number one fear is rejection.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_03: Everywhere on the planet.
• 32:53
  SPEAKER_03: I said at the beginning, you know, about two of you come up and pray for me.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_03: What we all deal with is that how others perceive us.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_03: And it's just an outgrowth of I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_03: I was afraid fear because I was naked.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_03: Shame is a result of a sense of not measuring up, a sense of not being attractive, a sense of not being all that we should be, which after the fall we weren't.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_03: Shame, if you want to think of it this way, shame is like self-rejection.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_03: Shame is a form of just rejecting ourselves.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_03: And then I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_03: So what we do is we isolate ourselves.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_03: We sort of, how many of you can relate to the whole turtle in the shell kind of thing?
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_03: So what we do is we live life from inside our shell, afraid to let anybody really see us, because we're afraid if they really see us, they won't like us, so we don't come out.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_03: And yet we live starving for someone to really know us and still love us.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_03: Now, why am I saying all this?
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_03: Because this is what the church is supposed to be fixing: fear, shame, and isolation.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_03: Now, we're not going to take time to do a lot with this right now, but what casts out fear?
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_03: Perfect love.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_03: 1 John 4.18.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_03: Where's the only place to get perfect love?
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_03: From the Father.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_03: So the answer to fear is the Father's love.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_03: Shame is this self-rejection, performance-driven, self-esteem, all that good stuff.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_03: So not to dwell there too long, but the answer to shame is grace.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_03: Really get a revelation of the grace of God.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_03: The unmerited, undeserved, unearned approval and pleasure of God.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_03: I love to talk about grace.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_03: Love to talk about grace.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_03: And then the answer to isolation is what I would call true community.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_03: Now here's the problem.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_03: Not a lot of places you can find that.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_03: Not a lot of places you can find that.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_03: We learned to live with our masks off.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_03: We really learned to live with our masks off.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_03: Well, then I left there and went to work for another church for one year that was extraordinarily unhealthy.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, really unhealthy.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_03: Very supernaturally powerful.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_03: If you had gone to Sunday services, the presence of God and the power of God, listen now, as strong as I've ever experienced it anywhere in my life.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_03: It was amazing.
• 36:21
  SPEAKER_03: But when I'd go into the office on Monday morning, it was like working for the devil himself.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_03: The guy was so insecure, controlling.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_03: It was awful.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_03: No true community at all.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_03: But a year later, I started our church, wounded badly from this church, so I didn't start well.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_03: But around three to four years into our church, my displeasure with the way I built my church, because I built it on the model of the last one, because I wanted all that supernatural stuff, but my DNA started to come out, and I realized that I was starving for that relational stuff.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_03: And so we transitioned our culture, and for the last 20 plus years, we've had a culture with really, really true community where our leaders spend lots of time together and we've learned to live life with our masks off.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_03: Say yes if that makes sense.
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_03: My point is you guys have the potential to be part of a revolution.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_03: You really do.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_03: But you've got to, you don't have to think my way or accept my thoughts, but somehow we've got to help the church deal with this stuff.
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_03: Because I'm telling you, there's something beyond description that shifts in us when we get victory over fear, when we get victory over shame, and when we learn to live in true community.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_03: And we're going to talk about that as we get into this whole boundaries concept.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_03: But I just wanted to throw that at you because while you're up here, you realize you have an opportunity to work on all three of those.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, what better place to learn to receive and rest in the Father's love than here?
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_03: And if you ask me what is the most important thing you've learned in the last 20 years, without hesitation, number one thing I've learned in the last 20 years is how to receive and rest in the Father's love.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_03: How to live loved, like we talked about yesterday.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_03: Number one thing I've learned.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_03: The number two, if you ask me, tell me the two or three key things you've learned.
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_03: The second thing I would tell you is what we're about to talk about boundaries.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_03: This whole understanding of boundaries has saved my life.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_03: Just the ability to define and defend my personal space.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_03: It affects your marriage, it affects your friendships, it affects your career, it affects your parenting, it affects everything.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_03: The third thing I've learned is how to monitor and manage what goes on between my ears.
• 39:17
  SPEAKER_03: How to monitor and manage what goes on between my ears.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_03: I just figured out that I'm the Lord of the manor.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_03: You understand what I'm saying?
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_03: I'm the boss of the house, and I decide what radio channel I'm tuned to.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_03: I decide who holds the microphone inside my brain.
• 39:39
  SPEAKER_03: And as I've learned to do these things, it's helped me just live this much more just anchored, rooted, stable.
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_03: Just, I'm just having a blast, to be honest with you.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_03: I'm having a blast.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_03: And I get to sit with some really powerful leaders that are doing some amazing stuff.
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_03: I remember the first time I sat at a table alone in a room with a guy who pastors 12,000 people.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_03: And he would talk for five, six, seven minutes.
• 40:09
  SPEAKER_03: And then he stopped.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_03: And he looked at me.
• 40:14
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm not kidding you, this is how weird it was.
• 40:17
  SPEAKER_03: I said, What?
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_03: He said, What do you think?
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_03: I said, You want to know what I think?
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_03: Pastors 12,000 people, one of the best-known pastors in America.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_03: And this dude was asking me what I think.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_03: I said, God, this is sick.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_03: There's just something wrong with this.
• 40:36
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the thing: there were things about the way he was doing life, not church.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_03: I can't help him with church, but there were things about the way he was doing life that he needed help with.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_03: Now I'd never have been in that room.
• 40:53
  SPEAKER_03: Never could have walked in the room if God hadn't helped me with these kinds of things.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_03: You have no idea what your journey might be like.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_03: You have no idea.
• 41:05
  SPEAKER_03: You have no idea where God might take you.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the deal: the way you get where you want to go is manage the inside.
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_03: Manage the inside.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_03: And the outside will take care of itself.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_03: Manage the inside.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_03: And the outside will take care of itself.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_03: You learn to walk free of these three things.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_03: I promise you.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_03: You learn to walk free of those three things, you'll be astounded at where God takes you.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_03: You know why I can say that with such confidence?
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_03: This is rare.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_03: This is rare for you to learn to walk free of this stuff.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_03: Some of you from different cultures.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_03: Imagine taking that back into your culture.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_03: Imagine taking freedom from fear, freedom from shame, freedom from that isolating, separating, jockeying first position.
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_03: Imagine taking back into your culture this expression of the kingdom that's revolutionary.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's just cool stuff.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_03: It's fun stuff.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's cool to watch God mess with all of this stuff.
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_03: Alright, any questions before we switch gears and start talking about boundaries?
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_03: Any questions about anything?
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you, Lord.
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_03: Is God good or what?
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_03: You're a good bunch.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_03: Would somebody jump up here and erase that for me real quick?
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_03: I just want to keep running my mouth here.
• 42:56
  SPEAKER_03: Run over to Matthew 12 real quick.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think I've talked to you about my friend in Matthew 12.
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_03: Turn your Bibles to Matthew 12 real quick.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_03: This is not quite getting into boundaries, but it's like a setup for boundaries.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_03: You know, if you taught on evangelism, you'd be drawn to certain scriptures.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_03: If you taught on finances, you'd be drawn to certain scriptures.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_03: If you taught on marriage, you'd be drawn to certain scriptures.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_03: Well, when you're a metamorphologist, when you're wired like God wired me, there's just different scriptures that you're drawn to, different places that your heart takes you.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_03: So I remember years ago, I would read a few verses in Matthew 12, and they just perplexed me.
• 43:45
  SPEAKER_03: Matthew 12, 43 to 45.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_03: And it talks about an unclean spirit goes out of a man.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_03: Now, what I want to do is take a little pastoral prerogative here, and I want to stretch that to any time you have an encounter with God that produces some sort of a breakthrough.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_03: Anytime you have, it could be emotional, it could be whatever, but anytime you have a breakthrough with God, the dynamic we're about to look at is at stake, you might say.
• 44:17
  SPEAKER_03: So here's this guy in Matthew 12, 43 to 45.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_03: An unclean spirit goes out of a man and he seeks, or I better read it.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_03: Let me borrow your Bible.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 44:33
  SPEAKER_03: When an unclean spirit goes out of a man, he goes through dry places.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_03: Who is he?
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_03: The spirit.
• 44:40
  SPEAKER_03: Just, you know, playing with it.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_03: He goes through kind of places seeking rest and he finds none.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_03: Then he says, Who's he again?
• 44:48
  SPEAKER_03: The spirit, the issue, the problem.
• 44:51
  SPEAKER_03: He says, I will return to my house.
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_03: What was his house?
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_03: This person's life.
• 44:59
  SPEAKER_03: This person's body.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_03: This person's thoughts.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_03: This person's emotions.
• 45:04
  SPEAKER_03: Now think about this for a moment.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_03: If you live in a house with somebody for a long time, you have a say in how it's decorated.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_03: You have a say in where the rooms, what colors they're painted.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_03: In other words, you have a say in how the room's set up.
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_03: I've got your Bible, is that okay?
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_03: So then he, the unclean spirit, says, I'm going to return to my house from which I came.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_03: And when he comes, he finds it empty, swept, and put in order.
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_03: Then he, the unclean spirit, goes and takes with him seven other spirits more wicked than himself.
• 45:36
  SPEAKER_03: And I believe it's one of the saddest phrases in the entire Bible.
• 45:40
  SPEAKER_03: They enter and dwell there, and the last state of that man is worse than the first.
• 45:46
  SPEAKER_03: Now here's the deal.
• 45:48
  SPEAKER_03: This person came to the school of ministry, and they encountered God in countless ways.
• 45:55
  SPEAKER_03: And they had amazing interaction with God.
• 45:59
  SPEAKER_03: But when they went back to life as usual, all the stuff that you worked on while you're here tries to come back.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you realize when you have a breakthrough in an area, the devil might back off for just a little bit, but he doesn't leave you.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 46:20
  SPEAKER_03: You want to see it in the scripture?
• 46:22
  SPEAKER_03: Let me give you another good verse.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_03: Luke 4.
• 46:25
  SPEAKER_03: Go to Luke 4 real quick.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_03: Luke 4 is where Jesus, and I'm still talking about Matthew 12, but I want you to connect it to this verse.
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_03: Because these are the kind of things you've got to protect yourself against.
• 46:39
  SPEAKER_03: In Luke 4, Jesus is led into the wilderness by the Holy Spirit.
• 46:45
  SPEAKER_03: And he faces the enemy and defeats him three times.
• 46:50
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 46:52
  SPEAKER_03: And then it says he comes out of the wilderness in power.
• 46:55
  SPEAKER_03: But look at verse 13.
• 46:57
  SPEAKER_03: Luke 4, verse 13.
• 47:03
  SPEAKER_03: The devil departed to never return.
• 47:07
  SPEAKER_03: Is that what it says?
• 47:09
  SPEAKER_03: What does it say?
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_03: He departed until an opportune time.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_03: What's another translation?
• 47:19
  SPEAKER_03: Until the next opportunity came.
• 47:20
  SPEAKER_03: Here's the deal, folks.
• 47:22
  SPEAKER_03: When you have a breakthrough in God, the enemy, here's my little picture of it.
• 47:26
  SPEAKER_03: It's like the enemy moves away just enough for you to kind of forget he's there.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_03: He moves just outside of the circle of light.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_03: If you can imagine yourself in like a spotlight.
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_03: When you have a breakthrough, he moves away just enough that you kind of forget he's there.
• 47:45
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 47:45
  SPEAKER_03: Because he wants you to lower your defenses.
• 47:48
  SPEAKER_03: And what he does is he just waits and watches.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_03: And then when you get tired, when you get distracted, when you get hurt, when you get busy, when you get caught up in other things, he begins to try to sneak his way back in.
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_03: Now here's a really, really, really, really important question.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_03: Does he come in a whole new way that you've never seen before?
• 48:15
  SPEAKER_03: Guess how he comes?
• 48:17
  SPEAKER_03: The same way you used to be oppressed.
• 48:21
  unknown: Sometimes he just oppressed it.
• 48:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he might change clothes, but here's the thing you got to think about.
• 48:28
  SPEAKER_03: If you deal with self-image issues, and while you're up here, you really make progress.
• 48:35
  SPEAKER_03: When you go back out there, the opportunity for him to sneak around is going to come.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_03: And that's where he's going to come back into.
• 48:44
  SPEAKER_03: Here's my word for Luke 4.13.
• 48:47
  SPEAKER_03: It's what I call lurking, L-U-R-K-I-N-G, lurking familiar spirits.
• 48:55
  SPEAKER_03: Lurking familiar spirits.
• 48:57
  SPEAKER_03: What do I mean?
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_03: The enemy just kind of lurks around your life, and he's looking for ways to come back into you and into your emotions, your thinking in very familiar ways.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_03: Another way to say it is this lurking familial, familial spirits.
• 49:20
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 49:23
  SPEAKER_03: They're assigned to your family.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you know families have patterns?
• 49:29
  SPEAKER_03: Anger issues, depression issues, emotional passivity issues.
• 49:37
  SPEAKER_03: And what happens is, I believe the enemy studies you, knows you.
• 49:43
  SPEAKER_03: I believe there's spirits that have been studying your family for generations.
• 49:48
  SPEAKER_03: And they know how to set you up.
• 49:52
  SPEAKER_03: Am I trying to scare you?
• 49:53
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not trying to scare you.
• 49:54
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just trying to tell you, you can get free, you can walk free, you can stay free.
• 49:59
  SPEAKER_03: But it takes effort.
• 50:02
  SPEAKER_03: It takes effort for the rest of your life.
• 50:05
  SPEAKER_03: To keep pressing into God, pressing into freedom.
• 50:09
  SPEAKER_03: But God can help you.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_03: All right, back to Matthew 12.
• 50:13
  SPEAKER_03: Here's this guy who has an encounter with the power of God, and the spirits leave, and then they come back and they find it empty, swept, and put in order.
• 50:25
  SPEAKER_03: And he goes and gets seven friends worse than himself, and they come back and they live there.
• 50:30
  SPEAKER_03: And the last state of that man is worse than the first.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_03: Here's the sad news.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_03: I pastored my church.
• 50:36
  SPEAKER_03: I was the senior pastor for 24 years.
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_03: We came up to Toronto in the mid-90s when it was all just brand new and going crazy.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_03: We've brought people into our church over the years.
• 50:55
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the observation of a guy who's lived there and lived with these people for 24 years.
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_03: That verse, Matthew 12, 43 to 45, is way too often the truth.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_03: Some of you get up in a revival meeting, and the presence of God's been thick and strong, and cool stuff has happened, and they get up, take the microphone.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_03: I'll never be the same in Jesus' name.
• 51:18
  SPEAKER_03: I've been set free from XYZ.
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_03: And I live there.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't hit there and leave.
• 51:25
  SPEAKER_03: I live there.
• 51:26
  SPEAKER_03: You know what the sad truth is?
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_03: Three to six months later, not only are they not the same, they're what?
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_03: They're worse.
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_03: Now, I used to read this passage and it used to drive me crazy.
• 51:42
  SPEAKER_03: What did this poor?
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_03: This is what I used to think.
• 51:44
  SPEAKER_03: What did this poor guy do?
• 51:47
  SPEAKER_03: God, why is this verse in here?
• 51:48
  SPEAKER_03: What are you trying to tell us?
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I told you earlier I'm a word freak.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_03: I love words.
• 51:53
  SPEAKER_03: I love to play with words, study words, think about words.
• 51:57
  SPEAKER_03: And so I took that passage and I looked up every single word in my strong's concordance.
• 52:04
  SPEAKER_03: And I found some really cool stuff.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_03: And it all boils down to those three words: empty, swept.
• 52:12
  SPEAKER_03: King James says garnished or put in order.
• 52:16
  SPEAKER_03: Empty, swept, or put in order.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_03: The messages I had always heard were, well, the problem was empty, and this guy didn't get full of the Holy Ghost.
• 52:27
  SPEAKER_03: And I heard sermons, not many, but I heard a few sermons using this passage and talked about how important it was to be full of the Holy Spirit.
• 52:34
  SPEAKER_03: Well, unfortunately, I knew lots of folks who were full of the Spirit that were still ending up worse than they started.
• 52:41
  SPEAKER_03: So I wasn't satisfied.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_03: So I looked up the word empty, and guess what I found it meant?
• 52:49
  SPEAKER_03: The word empty meant to go on vacation.
• 52:56
  SPEAKER_03: It meant the house was empty because the family had gone to the lake.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_03: It also meant to loiter.
• 53:07
  SPEAKER_03: What does it mean to loiter?
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_03: It means to stand around doing nothing.
• 53:15
  SPEAKER_03: It means to lean against the wall doing nothing.
• 53:20
  SPEAKER_03: Now, what in the world are you trying to say, dude?
• 53:23
  SPEAKER_03: I believe the reason this guy ended worse than he started is he had a breakthrough in God, and afterwards he leaned back in his chair, put his feet up on his desk, and chilled.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_03: Remember, I stressed, whose house was it?
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_03: I'm going to return to my house?
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_03: Who said that?
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_03: The spirit, the issue, the problem, right?
• 53:51
  SPEAKER_03: Well, if it if the spirit could say it was my house, then the spirit had some say in how the house was designed and how it operated.
• 53:58
  SPEAKER_03: Here's my key thought: you increase or maintain your victimization by your resistance to change.
• 54:07
  SPEAKER_03: After God touches your life, you've got to change in that area that he touched.
• 54:14
  SPEAKER_03: If you don't change the house, the problem's coming back.
• 54:22
  SPEAKER_03: You increase or maintain your victimization by your resistance to change.
• 54:30
  SPEAKER_03: God touches you in the area of his love.
• 54:32
  SPEAKER_03: And you have this amazing moment where you feel his love.
• 54:39
  SPEAKER_03: But he wants you to take that and then start looking at how that affects the way you see yourself, how it affects your pursuit of a spouse, how it affects your feelings toward your parents, how it affects your feeling toward your calling.
• 54:53
  SPEAKER_03: He wants you to take that new moment of love.
• 54:57
  SPEAKER_03: And he wants you to let it just start filtering its way through your soul.
• 55:03
  SPEAKER_03: But you just kind of bask in it.
• 55:05
  SPEAKER_03: You just kind of go on vacation with it.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_03: And if you do, you're not remodeling the house.
• 55:15
  SPEAKER_03: And unfortunately, you're leaving it vulnerable for the enemy to come back.
• 55:22
  SPEAKER_03: I can't even begin to tell you how much my wife and my our lives have changed in ways we never imagined.
• 55:31
  SPEAKER_03: I could chase all kinds of our thoughts about money.
• 55:35
  SPEAKER_03: What do you mean?
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_03: I used to have what I think would be called a poverty spirit.
• 55:41
  SPEAKER_03: A poverty spirit is when you just kind of subconsciously believe that all you can really hope for is just enough to get by.
• 55:50
  SPEAKER_03: A poverty spirit is, you know what, if I can just pay my bills, I'm doing good.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_03: Now here's the deal.
• 55:57
  SPEAKER_03: I believe we serve a God of abundance.
• 56:01
  SPEAKER_03: The best definition I know for abundance is really quite simple.
• 56:05
  SPEAKER_03: More than enough.
• 56:09
  SPEAKER_03: More than enough.
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_03: So I believe we serve a God of abundance.
• 56:13
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_03: God wants to bless you, me, all of us, with more than enough.
• 56:21
  SPEAKER_03: What is enough?
• 56:23
  SPEAKER_03: Enough.
• 56:25
  SPEAKER_03: He wants you to have more than enough.
• 56:28
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_03: Because it's more blessed to give than to receive.
• 56:34
  SPEAKER_03: And if all you ever have is enough, you can't enter into this, the life of giving.
• 56:40
  SPEAKER_03: One reason, although I don't think that's even the most important.
• 56:44
  SPEAKER_03: The most important is God just likes to give.
• 56:47
  SPEAKER_03: And we rob him of the privilege.
• 56:49
  SPEAKER_03: So the point is, I wasn't even a focus of mine.
• 56:53
  SPEAKER_03: I wasn't like focused on the issue of money.
• 56:57
  SPEAKER_03: I was working to understand what was keeping me from receiving God's love and blah, blah, blah.
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_03: The point is, as I started and learn to receive and rest in it, as I would experience and then hold it longer, if that makes sense.
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_03: Lots of things happened.
• 57:12
  SPEAKER_03: I remember one time going to my wife and saying, darling, I got a weird question.
• 57:17
  SPEAKER_03: Is it right to feel this good for this long?
• 57:23
  SPEAKER_03: I just couldn't imagine.
• 57:25
  SPEAKER_03: I just started to feel good for longer and longer periods.
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_03: And I remember going to my wife saying, Is there something wrong with me?
• 57:34
  SPEAKER_03: I feel good all the time.
• 57:38
  SPEAKER_03: Wouldn't it be nice to feel good all the time?
• 57:44
  SPEAKER_03: Can I take a sidebar here for just a second?
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_03: One time, and I'm taking a sidebar.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_03: Help me remember to get back to that about money.
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_03: Somebody remember money.
• 57:54
  SPEAKER_03: One time, this is a sidebar, but I saw a look on a few faces, so I want to do this.
• 57:59
  SPEAKER_03: One time I was preaching at home.
• 58:01
  SPEAKER_03: I'm a recovering word of faith guy.
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_03: That only makes sense to you if you've been word of faith.
• 58:07
  SPEAKER_03: I am a word of faith guy.
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_03: What does that mean?
• 58:09
  SPEAKER_03: I believe covenant theology, I believe healing and all that kind of stuff.
• 58:12
  SPEAKER_03: But in the word of faith, we we just didn't do relationships very well.
• 58:16
  SPEAKER_03: It was a it was it was unhealthy for me.
• 58:19
  SPEAKER_03: Let me just put it that way.
• 58:21
  SPEAKER_03: So I used to preach on, I mean, I feel stupid now telling you this, but I used to get really stirred up when I preached.
• 58:30
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I would throw chairs.
• 58:32
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not kidding you.
• 58:33
  SPEAKER_03: I would, a friend of mine and I danced across the altar rails, and I mean, we just did crazy stuff.
• 58:39
  SPEAKER_03: Forgive me.
• 58:41
  SPEAKER_03: Went nuts.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_03: My kids were like, Dad, what is wrong with you?
• 58:46
  SPEAKER_03: The anointing just whatever.
• 58:48
  SPEAKER_03: But one time I preached and I just went crazy, and I preached on the authority of the believer and how we have authority over the devil.
• 58:56
  SPEAKER_03: And I just, I mean, I preached all how many of you know what I mean when I say I preached myself happy.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I used to do drugs.
• 59:03
  SPEAKER_03: I'm telling you what, the anointing beats any drug I ever took.
• 59:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I just flat preached myself happy, and I was just like, ah.
• 59:11
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I left church that day, and I just I felt this like weird little gray cloud.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I was just kind of like, I was thinking to myself, man, church was good, boy, that was good preaching.
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I just thought all that kind of stuff.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_03: But I had this weird little, it was like the sky was blue, but there's this one little gray cloud.
• 59:34
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, what is bothering me?
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I, you know, I can kind of tell the difference between God and the devil.
• 59:42
  SPEAKER_03: And I thought, that's not the devil.
• 59:47
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, God, what what what did I do?
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_03: All Sunday afternoon into the evening, I was like, God, what did I do that offended you?
• 59:58
  SPEAKER_03: Did is what I'm teaching wrong?
• 1:00:00
  SPEAKER_03: I go to bed that night, get up Monday morning, and there it was.
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_03: It's a little gray cloud.
• 1:00:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, Father, I'm so sorry.
• 1:00:09
  SPEAKER_03: What did I do?
• 1:00:10
  SPEAKER_03: Did I misrepresent you?
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_03: Did I pervert the scripture?
• 1:00:14
  SPEAKER_03: Did I, what did I do all day Monday?
• 1:00:18
  SPEAKER_03: Just wouldn't go away, and I'm just like all day, I'm like, God, what is it?
• 1:00:24
  SPEAKER_03: I get up Tuesday morning, there it is again.
• 1:00:28
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, God, please, sir, please forgive me.
• 1:00:32
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever it is.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_03: I don't even know.
• 1:00:37
  SPEAKER_03: And then very gently, I heard this little voice say, what you preached was the truth.
• 1:00:45
  SPEAKER_03: But don't ever make it look so easy again.
• 1:00:51
  SPEAKER_03: You shame my people when you make it look easy.
• 1:00:58
  SPEAKER_03: Are you listening to me?
• 1:01:00
  SPEAKER_03: I've been walking this stuff for 35 years.
• 1:01:06
  SPEAKER_03: I throw stuff at you because I want to I want to entice you.
• 1:01:10
  SPEAKER_03: I want to bait you.
• 1:01:11
  SPEAKER_03: I want to motivate you.
• 1:01:14
  SPEAKER_03: But I beg you guys, don't let me make it look easy.
• 1:01:21
  SPEAKER_03: I have died a thousand deaths getting here.
• 1:01:25
  SPEAKER_03: I have cried buckets of tears.
• 1:01:30
  SPEAKER_03: Buckets of tears.
• 1:01:33
  SPEAKER_03: I remember when I was getting this revelation, I remember after I'd been up here, probably, I don't know.
• 1:01:39
  SPEAKER_03: I remember, I literally remember crawling on my hands and knees in my sanctuary, crying and laughing at the same time.
• 1:01:51
  SPEAKER_03: As I was caught between the sadness of my soul and the joy of God's love.
• 1:01:58
  SPEAKER_03: And God was just, God was processing me through all my stuff.
• 1:02:03
  SPEAKER_03: I had to work through my dad's stuff, I had to work through my mom's stuff, I had to work through my own stuff.
• 1:02:11
  SPEAKER_03: Please don't let me make this look easy.
• 1:02:14
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 1:02:16
  SPEAKER_03: But don't you dare let anybody else make it look so hard you can't get it.
• 1:02:23
  SPEAKER_03: You can get this stuff, but it's gonna take what?
• 1:02:28
  SPEAKER_03: It begins with a T.
• 1:02:31
  SPEAKER_03: T-I-M-E.
• 1:02:35
  SPEAKER_03: It's gonna take some time.
• 1:02:38
  SPEAKER_03: One time I was teaching this stuff, and somebody asked me, dude, from the time you started to get this stuff, how long was it before you really felt like it was working?
• 1:02:51
  SPEAKER_03: Is that a good question?
• 1:02:54
  SPEAKER_03: From the time I started to get an idea of how important the Father's love was.
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_03: In other words, from the time I was like, this is really, really big.
• 1:03:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I consciously, deliberately started to go after it.
• 1:03:10
  SPEAKER_03: From that time to when it was, listen now, a fairly consistent working part of my life.
• 1:03:19
  SPEAKER_03: Anybody want to guess?
• 1:03:23
  SPEAKER_03: Didn't mean I didn't visit it often, but before it was a really fairly consistent part of my life.
• 1:03:31
  SPEAKER_03: How long do you think it was?
• 1:03:33
  SPEAKER_03: From the time I saw how important it was and went after it, till it became a fairly consistent part.
• 1:03:40
  SPEAKER_03: What do you think?
• 1:03:42
  SPEAKER_03: Five years?
• 1:03:44
  SPEAKER_03: Ten years?
• 1:03:46
  SPEAKER_03: Seven?
• 1:03:50
  SPEAKER_03: My answer would be three years.
• 1:03:56
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 1:03:56
  SPEAKER_03: I'm pastoring full time, got lots of time to be in the word, lots of time to be in prayer.
• 1:04:03
  SPEAKER_03: I'm a counselor, so I think layers, process.
• 1:04:10
  SPEAKER_03: So quite honestly, I probably cheated a little.
• 1:04:16
  SPEAKER_03: But here's the deal.
• 1:04:18
  SPEAKER_03: What if it took you three years?
• 1:04:23
  SPEAKER_03: Now some of you might be thinking, oh dude, you're stupid and slow, I'll get it in six months.
• 1:04:27
  SPEAKER_03: Have at it.
• 1:04:29
  SPEAKER_03: Get it.
• 1:04:31
  SPEAKER_03: But let me ask you again, what if it took you three years?
• 1:04:38
  SPEAKER_03: And what if the rest of your life would be lived in a place and from a place that few people ever touch?
• 1:04:53
  SPEAKER_03: Would it be worth it?
• 1:04:57
  SPEAKER_03: What if it took you the next three years of your life?
• 1:05:01
  SPEAKER_03: Think about that for a minute.
• 1:05:03
  SPEAKER_03: What if locking on to it?
• 1:05:06
  SPEAKER_03: What if it took you three years?
• 1:05:10
  SPEAKER_03: But what if you could live the rest of your natural life in and out of the Father's love?
• 1:05:23
  SPEAKER_03: Like I love this statement.
• 1:05:24
  SPEAKER_03: Listen to this statement.
• 1:05:26
  SPEAKER_03: You were created to live from fullness, not for fullness.
• 1:05:35
  SPEAKER_03: You were created to live from a place of fullness.
• 1:05:43
  SPEAKER_03: You can walk into every moment, every situation, every relationship, every challenge, every responsibility.
• 1:05:49
  SPEAKER_03: You can walk into that thing already full, requiring nothing.
• 1:05:57
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I love about this?
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_03: I stand before you yesterday morning as we met for the first time today, and every day we'll ever meet.
• 1:06:05
  SPEAKER_03: Here's the deal: I want you to like me.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_03: And I hope you like me.
• 1:06:12
  SPEAKER_03: I hope when I'm gone you say nice things about me.
• 1:06:16
  SPEAKER_03: But I don't need you to like me for me to be okay.
• 1:06:22
  SPEAKER_03: You follow me?
• 1:06:24
  SPEAKER_03: I want you to like me.
• 1:06:27
  SPEAKER_03: But I don't need you to like me.
• 1:06:33
  SPEAKER_03: You know what my test of good theology is?
• 1:06:37
  SPEAKER_03: My test of good theology?
• 1:06:39
  SPEAKER_03: How does it live?
• 1:06:42
  SPEAKER_03: This lives good.
• 1:06:45
  SPEAKER_03: This lives really good.
• 1:06:50
  SPEAKER_03: How'd you like to get to a place where it's very hard for people to manipulate you?
• 1:06:56
  SPEAKER_03: You know how people manipulate you?
• 1:06:58
  SPEAKER_03: Because you perceive they have something you need.
• 1:07:02
  SPEAKER_03: If they don't have anything you need, they can't manipulate you.
• 1:07:06
  SPEAKER_03: But if you need their approval, if you need their affection, if you need whatever it is that they have, then you are susceptible to manipulation and control.
• 1:07:17
  SPEAKER_03: But if they don't have anything you need, you're pretty hard to manipulate.
• 1:07:24
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 1:07:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's a really cool place to learn to live.
• 1:07:31
  SPEAKER_03: It's really cool.
• 1:07:34
  SPEAKER_03: Met a pastor and his wife, and they, whatever, I taught kind of like this, and they came to me afterwards and said, hey, we want you to come to the church.
• 1:07:45
  SPEAKER_03: So we met for lunch.
• 1:07:46
  SPEAKER_03: And later, after I'd been to their church the first time, we were talking, and they said to my wife and I, they said, you know what happened the first time we ever met you and we went to lunch?
• 1:07:58
  SPEAKER_03: You know what our you know what our reactor, our first initial response to you was?
• 1:08:03
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, No, I'm curious.
• 1:08:06
  SPEAKER_03: And they said, as soon as we sat down to lunch, we could tell you didn't care if we liked you.
• 1:08:13
  SPEAKER_03: So we've never we've never had that happen before.
• 1:08:18
  SPEAKER_03: We we sat down with you and we could tell you didn't care if we liked you or invited you to our church.
• 1:08:25
  SPEAKER_03: You didn't care.
• 1:08:27
  SPEAKER_03: And she said, not in a bad way, but in this really weirdly healthy way, we could tell you didn't even care.
• 1:08:37
  SPEAKER_03: Now do you understand what I'm trying to say?
• 1:08:39
  SPEAKER_03: I would like to go to their church, to be honest with you, that's how I make my living, and it's my passion to help people get this stuff.
• 1:08:47
  SPEAKER_03: But I don't need their money.
• 1:08:49
  SPEAKER_03: Why don't I need their money?
• 1:08:51
  SPEAKER_03: Who's my source?
• 1:08:53
  SPEAKER_03: Or listen to me carefully.
• 1:08:55
  SPEAKER_03: You'll worship your source.
• 1:08:59
  SPEAKER_03: You'll be able to manage resource.
• 1:09:02
  SPEAKER_03: So what I do is God's my source.
• 1:09:04
  SPEAKER_03: Anybody who writes me a check is just a resource.
• 1:09:08
  SPEAKER_03: You're gonna worship your source.
• 1:09:10
  SPEAKER_03: Whoever, whatever you look to as your source, you're gonna worship.
• 1:09:19
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to always keep straight who your source is.
• 1:09:22
  SPEAKER_03: What am I supposed to get back to?
• 1:09:23
  SPEAKER_03: Anyone remember?
• 1:09:24
  unknown: Money.
• 1:09:25
  SPEAKER_03: Money.
• 1:09:27
  SPEAKER_03: So what happened?
• 1:09:27
  SPEAKER_03: Here I am cooking along, just trying to get a revelation of the father's love.
• 1:09:31
  SPEAKER_03: And I always had this problem with finances.
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_03: I always had this issue of, remember the, I think I shared yesterday that the soul the phrase steered in my soul from my father was, you're lazy and you never amount to anything.
• 1:09:43
  SPEAKER_03: So I had this weird self-sabotaging issue.
• 1:09:47
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't believe I deserved to succeed because I didn't believe I worked hard enough.
• 1:09:52
  SPEAKER_03: Well, God began to show me his love, God began to talk to me about that he made me the way I am and all that cool stuff.
• 1:09:59
  SPEAKER_03: And like I said, I wasn't focusing on money.
• 1:10:03
  SPEAKER_03: But down the road a bit, as I learned to receive and rest in his love more consistently, you know what I started noticing?
• 1:10:11
  SPEAKER_03: I wasn't sabotaging myself.
• 1:10:14
  SPEAKER_03: I was actually starting to experience success and not blow it up.
• 1:10:20
  SPEAKER_03: And you know what I started to notice?
• 1:10:24
  SPEAKER_03: I was making more money.
• 1:10:26
  SPEAKER_03: And about 10 years prior to this, this point I'm talking about, I had set a figure.
• 1:10:32
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, God, if I could just make that much money a year, wow, that would be amazing.
• 1:10:40
  SPEAKER_03: And you know what I realized?
• 1:10:42
  SPEAKER_03: The year God was showing me this about money, after I'd kind of learned to walk in his love more consistently, that year I made that amount of money.
• 1:10:54
  SPEAKER_03: It was a pretty good amount of money.
• 1:10:55
  SPEAKER_03: You could make a pretty decent living there.
• 1:10:58
  SPEAKER_03: And to my shock and amazement, God has continued.
• 1:11:03
  SPEAKER_03: I turned my church over another guy.
• 1:11:05
  SPEAKER_03: I stepped out and do this stuff all the time on the road.
• 1:11:09
  SPEAKER_03: And it is through the through the economy and the craziness of these last few years, lots of my friends will call and say, dude, how you doing?
• 1:11:15
  SPEAKER_03: It's gotta be hard being a traveling ministry with the economy like it is.
• 1:11:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, you know, I almost feel embarrassed.
• 1:11:22
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, well, not really.
• 1:11:23
  SPEAKER_03: I'm doing great.
• 1:11:26
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 1:11:26
  SPEAKER_03: I think because I'm cheap, for one thing.
• 1:11:30
  SPEAKER_03: Means I don't cost a whole lot.
• 1:11:31
  SPEAKER_03: And number two, most of what I do is very relationally driven.
• 1:11:37
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm kind of this weird little niche, and people call me in when they're in trouble.
• 1:11:42
  SPEAKER_03: Well, when you're in trouble, you're gonna spend money.
• 1:11:45
  SPEAKER_03: So for some reason, I've just stayed really, really busy.
• 1:11:49
  SPEAKER_03: But my point to you is learning to receive and rest the Father's love had lots of side effects that I didn't really think about.
• 1:12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Does that make sense?
• 1:12:01
  SPEAKER_03: You guys have gotta zero in on this stuff and go for it.
• 1:12:07
  SPEAKER_03: Any questions before we take our break?
• 1:12:11
  SPEAKER_03: Y'all alright?
• 1:12:13
  SPEAKER_03: I appreciate your attention, by the way.
• 1:12:16
  SPEAKER_03: I've learned attention is one of the greatest gifts we can give someone.
• 1:12:21
  SPEAKER_03: One of the things I worry about in our cultures as we become more technology driven, is we're losing the capacity to pay attention.
• 1:12:31
  SPEAKER_03: Now think about that for a moment.
• 1:12:33
  SPEAKER_03: We're losing the capacity to genuinely be with someone and engage their soul.
• 1:12:43
  SPEAKER_03: Think about that some.
• 1:12:45
  SPEAKER_03: I was counseling a young guy, about 30, sharp guy from the UK, great guy.
• 1:12:51
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, one of my best friends now, great guy.
• 1:12:54
  SPEAKER_03: And I'd been to his church two, three times at this point.
• 1:12:57
  SPEAKER_03: And there was always something I was trying to put my finger on, and I couldn't put my finger on it.
• 1:13:02
  SPEAKER_03: And then this third visit or so, we were out having coffee, and I said, you know what, dude?
• 1:13:07
  SPEAKER_03: I finally figured out something I've been trying to figure out.
• 1:13:10
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, you know what it is?
• 1:13:12
  SPEAKER_03: You never give your full attention to anyone, including your wife.
• 1:13:19
  SPEAKER_03: You're always multitasking.
• 1:13:23
  SPEAKER_03: And he instantly knew what I meant.
• 1:13:25
  SPEAKER_03: You always have something else rotating in the background.
• 1:13:30
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, dude, I really believe one of the key things God wants you to focus on, learn, and break through, is you've got to learn how to be present.
• 1:13:39
  SPEAKER_03: You've got to learn how to be with whomever you're with.
• 1:13:45
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you know it's an art to really be with whoever's in front of you and shut out all the other moments and things pulling and poking and pushing on you and really be present.
• 1:14:01
  SPEAKER_03: It's a cool thing to learn.
• 1:14:03
  SPEAKER_03: Isn't it a cool gift to give someone?
• 1:14:05
  SPEAKER_03: To really be present with them?
• 1:14:09
  SPEAKER_03: One of my prayers that I've prayed for years is I want someone.
• 1:14:16
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you have you ever thought about what it would have been like to be in Jesus' presence?
• 1:14:21
  SPEAKER_03: In journaling, I've been in his presence.
• 1:14:24
  SPEAKER_03: I've been in his presence through journaling.
• 1:14:28
  SPEAKER_03: And you know what?
• 1:14:30
  SPEAKER_03: Jesus knew how to be present.
• 1:14:34
  SPEAKER_03: I believe Jesus had an ability.
• 1:14:37
  SPEAKER_03: If there were thousands thronging him, he had an ability to make you feel like you're the only person he's talking to.
• 1:14:45
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you agree that if you feel valued when someone pays attention to you?
• 1:14:52
  SPEAKER_03: Raise your hand if you agree with that.
• 1:14:55
  SPEAKER_03: How many of you know you reap what you so guess what?
• 1:15:00
  SPEAKER_03: If you want to feel the value of someone else's attention, what can you do?
• 1:15:06
  SPEAKER_03: Give your attention.
• 1:15:08
  SPEAKER_03: Practice giving your attention to people.
• 1:15:12
  SPEAKER_03: How many at a time?
• 1:15:14
  SPEAKER_03: One.
• 1:15:16
  SPEAKER_03: One at a time.
• 1:15:20
  SPEAKER_03: I love the eye contact y'all make, by the way.
• 1:15:23
  SPEAKER_03: Y'all have really good eye contact.
• 1:15:26
  SPEAKER_03: That's not always the case.
• 1:15:34
  SPEAKER_03: Ready for a break?
• 1:15:36
  SPEAKER_03: You guys are awesome.
• 1:15:39
  SPEAKER_03: Bless you guys.