Latest / The Everyday Awesome Project / 108: Commitment to Yourself: Stop Waiting for Motivation and Start Showing Up

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108: Commitment to Yourself: Stop Waiting for Motivation and Start Showing Up · The Everyday Awesome Project

• 0:27
  Polly Mertens: Hey superstars, welcome back.
• 0:28
  Polly Mertens: Polly here and Sam Pruitt.
• 0:30
  Samantha Pruitt: What's up, beautiful humans?
• 0:32
  Samantha Pruitt: Firstly, it's so great to have you back on the episodes.
• 0:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Thank you, my dear.
• 0:37
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 0:38
  Samantha Pruitt: Good to be back.
• 0:40
  Samantha Pruitt: Good to be back.
• 0:41
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 0:42
  Polly Mertens: And what a fun topic.
• 0:43
  Polly Mertens: Commitment to self-time.
• 0:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Exactly.
• 0:46
  Samantha Pruitt: We're still in January.
• 0:48
  Samantha Pruitt: So we thought uh this topic is timely because you and I don't do New Year's resolutions.
• 0:58
  Samantha Pruitt: We do revolutions if we do anything.
• 1:00
  Samantha Pruitt: We don't do resolutions.
• 1:01
  Samantha Pruitt: But this isn't really about that.
• 1:03
  Samantha Pruitt: It's about really owning your life.
• 1:06
  Polly Mertens: Mmm.
• 1:07
  Polly Mertens: You know, I think some people have a fear of that word commitment, whether you put it in relationship or, you know, committing to hard things or whatever.
• 1:16
  Polly Mertens: Um, and I really want us to dispel what they think, you know, like why would you be afraid of this, right?
• 1:23
  Polly Mertens: Like, I think there's so many benefits of quote committed life or committed to your things, right?
• 1:30
  Polly Mertens: And what what what is the full title?
• 1:32
  Polly Mertens: Commitment to joy, self.
• 1:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Commitment to self, right?
• 1:36
  Samantha Pruitt: So it's your dreams, your joy, your life.
• 1:40
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 1:41
  Samantha Pruitt: That's a full commitment to myself, making all of that happen, right?
• 1:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Having complete agency over all of those things.
• 1:49
  Samantha Pruitt: Mm-hmm.
• 1:50
  Polly Mertens: Mm-hmm.
• 1:50
  Polly Mertens: Because what what the alternative is we give it over to somebody else or like like hope for it or whatever.
• 1:55
  Polly Mertens: Like this is like I'm committed to having these things in my life.
• 1:58
  Polly Mertens: My joy, you know, I'm I'm choosing that, right?
• 2:01
  Polly Mertens: And that's part of it, like deciding, choosing it.
• 2:04
  Polly Mertens: So I love this topic.
• 2:06
  Polly Mertens: I'm so glad you, you know, we came up with this.
• 2:08
  Polly Mertens: And yeah, like you said, January, if you're whenever you're listening to this, it's always a good topic, but you know, January, especially, because I think people like kind of come out of that New Year's slumber, ah, what do I want to do?
• 2:19
  Polly Mertens: And, you know, have wavering commitment to that.
• 2:22
  Polly Mertens: And I'll talk about some of the places where I've been out of my you know integrity with my commitments and you know, like how that happens and you know, some of that.
• 2:29
  Samantha Pruitt: So well, yeah, and this isn't like um a lot of you know, New Year's revolutions, resolutions are really people sort of beating themselves into submission over things they don't like about themselves.
• 2:40
  Samantha Pruitt: This is also the polar opposite of that.
• 2:42
  Samantha Pruitt: It's like, who the hell am I?
• 2:44
  Samantha Pruitt: What do I stand for?
• 2:46
  Samantha Pruitt: What am I about?
• 2:46
  Samantha Pruitt: And then how can I get up to that to build my dream life, you know?
• 2:51
  Samantha Pruitt: And that takes a different uh level of awareness, which we'll get into what it is, why it is, and how to do it.
• 2:58
  Samantha Pruitt: But like that's where the real value is, the real joy, the total bliss is like in that place, not like how can I make this part of my life look better, be better, produce more, whatever, whatever, however, you deem success, right?
• 3:15
  Samantha Pruitt: This is about you, real, just real ownership over being your best self.
• 3:19
  Samantha Pruitt: All right, let's do it.
• 3:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Let's do it.
• 3:22
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, so what does it mean to commit to oneself?
• 3:24
  Samantha Pruitt: What does it mean?
• 3:26
  Samantha Pruitt: First of all, so many people are scared, like you said, to even do this.
• 3:31
  Samantha Pruitt: It's about building agency over your life, right?
• 3:34
  Samantha Pruitt: So agency is not needing external approval or permission to be who you are, like having a sense of ownership, like we just discussed earlier about what do you stand for?
• 3:45
  Samantha Pruitt: What are your beliefs?
• 3:46
  Samantha Pruitt: What are your values?
• 3:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Who the hell are you anyway?
• 3:49
  Samantha Pruitt: And that's some deep, heavy work that many people maybe haven't done.
• 3:55
  Samantha Pruitt: Should they be afraid of doing that work and exploring that, Polly?
• 4:00
  Samantha Pruitt: Yes, probably yes, yes, you know, um, in a good way.
• 4:04
  Polly Mertens: And it's worth it, you know.
• 4:06
  Polly Mertens: You should, yeah, yeah, you probably because um you're gonna well, the number one thing, you know, just as a mindset coach, you know, I can't help but think about you're gonna bump up against the boundaries of your mindset, right?
• 4:18
  Polly Mertens: So should should you be afraid of it?
• 4:21
  Polly Mertens: It's like, yeah, because your mind is gonna tell you no, your mind is gonna want to keep you the same.
• 4:26
  Polly Mertens: Your mind is gonna say, not that.
• 4:28
  Polly Mertens: Oh my god, we can't do that or be that or whatever, right?
• 4:31
  Polly Mertens: So yeah, it's going to take this um level of commitment to yourself that, like, when I bump up against a boundary, a limitation, a self-imposed limiting belief or whatnot, right?
• 4:42
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, that that's probably gonna be some little bit of lifting, right?
• 4:46
  Polly Mertens: Because the mind's got all uncomfortable.
• 4:48
  Polly Mertens: The brain has an amazing way of throwing all kinds of shit at you that like to get you to not change, right?
• 4:54
  Polly Mertens: You're like, wait, are we on the same team here?
• 4:56
  Polly Mertens: Nope, not on the same team.
• 4:57
  Polly Mertens: Nope.
• 4:58
  Polly Mertens: You being your best self isn't always what the brain is up to.
• 5:01
  Polly Mertens: It's used to sameness, non, you know, minimizing energy, all that stuff.
• 5:05
  Polly Mertens: So yeah, but is but on the other side, right?
• 5:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Mm-hmm.
• 5:09
  Samantha Pruitt: And people who are famous for procrastinating or for looking for outside external forces, uh, family members, friends, society, coworkers, or whatever to validate those things are generally the ones who are most afraid of doing that work.
• 5:26
  Samantha Pruitt: And I would say at the core of that work is a sense of value for myself, self-worth.
• 5:33
  Samantha Pruitt: And so if I'm lacking in that, that is going to be difficult for me.
• 5:38
  Samantha Pruitt: And I will procrastinate and I will look to others to direct my life or to validate my success or my worth or all of those things.
• 5:45
  Samantha Pruitt: So, really, you have to be willing to look in the mirror and say, hey, my value isn't innate in just me being born, in me just showing the hell up and standing here tall in all of my imperfect glory and be willing to just like show up for my life.
• 6:03
  Samantha Pruitt: And nobody else needs to provide that for you.
• 6:06
  Samantha Pruitt: That has to come from yourself.
• 6:08
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, it's like intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation, right?
• 6:12
  Polly Mertens: You know, there's a lot of willpower and motivation.
• 6:16
  Polly Mertens: I had somebody text me yesterday and they're like, could you send me some motivating videos and this and that?
• 6:20
  Polly Mertens: And I was all Okay, yes, sure.
• 6:25
  Polly Mertens: You know, like you want some candy too to go with that, you know, just to like it's like fast food.
• 6:31
  Polly Mertens: It's like that that's not gonna nurture nourish you, it's not gonna nourish what you're actually seeking, right?
• 6:39
  Polly Mertens: Is getting up to something, being authentic with yourself, not you know, whatever you're pussyfooting around, like, okay, that whatever that is that you're avoiding, like you said, procrastinating and stuff.
• 6:51
  Polly Mertens: It's time to step it up.
• 6:53
  Polly Mertens: You don't need a motivational video when you have a compelling why, right?
• 6:56
  Polly Mertens: Like when you have like a I'm I'm doing this thing, I'm committed to this thing.
• 6:59
  Polly Mertens: Like it, I was telling somebody the other day, like they they were saying, and I believe and I love it, they said that their year word for the year, because I've been you know working with a lot of people on their word for the year and theme as part of the return of the light, and I was like, ignite.
• 7:11
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, that's great.
• 7:13
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, you know, and like it reminded me of push motivation, let's call it, you know, like from behind, like you know, you got somebody like what cracking a whip on you, kind of like ignite something.
• 7:24
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, that lasts for a time, and but pull motivation, you know, when it's something that you've created and you've put out into your future and it pulls you towards it, is it's like like a slow, long burn of something that you can just endure because it's like, yes, yes, it's not that fast flame die out, right?
• 7:45
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, ignite is great, right?
• 7:47
  Samantha Pruitt: It started, but again, is it gonna sustain the fire?
• 7:51
  Samantha Pruitt: No, sustaining the fire will be continuous logs and oxygen coming from you into the fire.
• 7:58
  Samantha Pruitt: I don't expect Polly to come over with cords of wood every week, and I don't expect, you know, my neighbor or my husband or whatever to be blowing on the fire to keeping it going.
• 8:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Like that fire is mine to tend.
• 8:11
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, exactly, exactly.
• 8:13
  Polly Mertens: And I think that's where committed is like even when I don't have the fire, that thing is a pulling me, like I'm so committed to it and do what it takes.
• 8:25
  Polly Mertens: And even when it's waxing and waning, but I don't need electric off-the-chart energy towards it to keep my commitment to it and to pursue it.
• 8:33
  Polly Mertens: And actually, you know, one of the things I find is um consistency is more valuable than motivation, right?
• 8:40
  Polly Mertens: Like even when you're not motivated, like consistency, like you do it just because I said I was gonna do it.
• 8:45
  Polly Mertens: I do it because you know, it's that long term.
• 8:48
  Samantha Pruitt: Consistency is my word and mantra for ultra running or ultra endurance.
• 8:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Anytime I have to be, I choose to be doing some extraordinary feat of many, many miles, hours, or whatever days it's gonna be or something.
• 9:02
  Samantha Pruitt: That literally is my go-to word.
• 9:05
  Samantha Pruitt: Just be consistent.
• 9:07
  Samantha Pruitt: I expect nothing else from myself except the consistency.
• 9:11
  Samantha Pruitt: And I know A, I'm capable of that because I trained that.
• 9:14
  Samantha Pruitt: I trained my mind and body to be consistent by continuously showing up, making the investment.
• 9:21
  Samantha Pruitt: And then when I have to, you know, do the work, like make shit happen, that I can fall back on with comfort because it's like, whoa, that's a muscle I have.
• 9:32
  Samantha Pruitt: That consistency muscle is my thing.
• 9:35
  Polly Mertens: I would need great comfort.
• 9:36
  Polly Mertens: I would take consistency over ignition or like a powerful, whatever.
• 9:41
  Polly Mertens: Like, yeah, to get it started.
• 9:44
  Polly Mertens: So maybe it's like ignite consistency, like like tie those two together, don't just have one or the other, right?
• 9:51
  Polly Mertens: Like, because you may not have, you know, if you need something, because there is definitely um I'm trying to remember what the word is in neuroscience about what's that?
• 10:00
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, the resistance.
• 10:01
  Polly Mertens: It's like you know, it's basically physics, the body in motion tends to stay in motion.
• 10:06
  Polly Mertens: A body at rest tends to stay at rest.
• 10:08
  Polly Mertens: And with your mind and your goals and all this things that you're up to, they all tend to stay flat and not happening if you let them sit, right?
• 10:17
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 10:17
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, totally, totally.
• 10:20
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, another thing I want to just mention at the gate about like what does it mean to commit to oneself?
• 10:24
  Samantha Pruitt: It does mean to be willing to explore and unearth these things within yourself.
• 10:31
  Samantha Pruitt: So that might require some time and some space, right, to allow that to happen.
• 10:36
  Samantha Pruitt: It's not necessarily something that needs to happen overnight.
• 10:39
  Samantha Pruitt: It can be something that you curate over days or weeks or whatever, as we get into kind of the how, the nuts and bolts of it.
• 10:45
  Samantha Pruitt: But you do need to open that place up within yourself.
• 10:50
  Samantha Pruitt: And one of the biggest gifts that will come out of that is self-knowing and self-trust.
• 10:56
  Samantha Pruitt: Those are gold nuggets, okay?
• 11:01
  Samantha Pruitt: The more you know yourself, the more you can live to your full potential, the more you trust yourself, the more you can take risks, totally leaps of faith, whatever you want to call it.
• 11:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Just try new shit, just be willing to show the hell up.
• 11:16
  Samantha Pruitt: And extraordinary things will happen with those two things.
• 11:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Like they're just giant gold coins in your pocket that you can just walk around life and be like, you know, talk about being rich.
• 11:28
  Samantha Pruitt: That's rich.
• 11:30
  Polly Mertens: I am putting, I am picking up what you're putting down, or it's like I as you were saying that, what was firing in the back of my mind.
• 11:37
  Polly Mertens: The second one is like, um, I believe in myself, right?
• 11:41
  Polly Mertens: Self-trust is like, no matter what comes, I fucking believe in myself.
• 11:45
  Polly Mertens: I I got this.
• 11:46
  Polly Mertens: However, the shit hits the fan, whatever, I'll be okay, right?
• 11:49
  Polly Mertens: And then know thyself, right?
• 11:51
  Polly Mertens: I really love adding that, like, like a component of that is like I really know, like, and trust myself, right?
• 11:58
  Polly Mertens: All of those things.
• 11:59
  Polly Mertens: So good.
• 12:00
  Polly Mertens: So good.
• 12:01
  Polly Mertens: But you're right, you know.
• 12:02
  Samantha Pruitt: Grand adventure, dude.
• 12:03
  Samantha Pruitt: It's a grand adventure called your freaking life.
• 12:05
  Polly Mertens: Well, and I think you pointed it.
• 12:07
  Polly Mertens: So, one of the best, I've been asking people for feedback from the return to light, and the best feedback.
• 12:11
  Polly Mertens: So, I did this massive undertaking, created this giant workbook, not giant, but like a, you know, a decent workbook.
• 12:17
  Polly Mertens: And it's got all these pages of questions and questions, you know, and and giving them time to do the work and then like come up the next week.
• 12:23
  Polly Mertens: And and the feedback I kept getting was like, wow, I really enjoyed all these questions, this time to be with myself and like, you know, some of the beauty of like looking at their magical moments for the year and celebration, you know, and and what where they grew, you know, and not giving that to ourselves, like not doing an inquiry, not finding out what we really want, where we are, all you know, like people just blipping along, like life by default, like okay, last year looked the same, let's just have more of that in the new year.
• 12:50
  Polly Mertens: But it's an opportunity, like you said, do that work.
• 12:53
  Polly Mertens: Like, what matters most to you, you know?
• 12:56
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and in and and as it evolves, right?
• 12:59
  Polly Mertens: Because like your values from you know, 10 years ago may not be your values right now, your priorities right now may not be what they were even 90 days ago, right?
• 13:08
  Samantha Pruitt: I hope they're not, or else you're standing still.
• 13:11
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, what the hell have you been asleep?
• 13:14
  Polly Mertens: How is it possible?
• 13:16
  Polly Mertens: Well, we're talking about commitment and consistency, so there'd be some that you know, but yeah, but things will indeed change.
• 13:23
  Polly Mertens: So it's like adjusting in moment by moment as well.
• 13:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, and the other um gold coin is like it turns ideas, just thoughts, ideas into action and actual results.
• 13:37
  Samantha Pruitt: So like change will occur because you're not asleep, you know, you're not standing still.
• 13:42
  Samantha Pruitt: You are now actually taking action and therefore all circumstances in your life will change.
• 13:52
  Samantha Pruitt: By the way, they do anyway, like in Buddhist terms, we call it everything is impermanent.
• 13:56
  Samantha Pruitt: But you don't, if you don't already have that sort of wrapped around yourself, it this is a good way to be like, hey, I can impact change, I do have the power, and all of these little things are gonna amount to big, big, big changes.
• 14:10
  Samantha Pruitt: You won't recognize yourself at the end of it.
• 14:13
  Samantha Pruitt: That's how it should be.
• 14:14
  Polly Mertens: That's the goal.
• 14:14
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 14:16
  Polly Mertens: Because it it should be an identity shift.
• 14:19
  Polly Mertens: We talk a little bit about that, but we'll come back.
• 14:21
  Polly Mertens: So, okay.
• 14:22
  Samantha Pruitt: So, why is it important?
• 14:23
  Samantha Pruitt: Because this is how you build success in your life.
• 14:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Last time I checked, a lot of people care about that.
• 14:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, happiness, again, people seem to be seeking kind of important, yeah.
• 14:33
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, happiness and choice, kind of a thing, right?
• 14:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, a deep sense of purpose and meaning to your life.
• 14:40
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, you know, living a fulfilling, meaningful life.
• 14:44
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, yeah.
• 14:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Gotta do that work.
• 14:47
  Samantha Pruitt: And then your connection to yourself and others.
• 14:51
  Polly Mertens: I'm so stuck.
• 14:52
  Polly Mertens: You just said purpose and meaning, and I've been doing a lot of study in both those two words.
• 14:57
  Polly Mertens: And I think we're gonna do an episode in the future.
• 14:59
  Polly Mertens: I'm just already hearing it, like separating those purpose and meaning.
• 15:03
  Polly Mertens: Meaning, I think is exactly what you double-clicked on.
• 15:06
  Polly Mertens: It's like, is it meaningful to you?
• 15:08
  Polly Mertens: Having a meaningful life, right?
• 15:10
  Polly Mertens: You know, and by knowing what you want, committing to what you want, you're actually living the life you fucking say you want, right?
• 15:19
  Polly Mertens: Like you're you're like, oh shit, look at this.
• 15:22
  Polly Mertens: I can have and do and be what I want in life.
• 15:25
  Polly Mertens: Starts with getting clear, like, know who you are, what what's important to you, and then get about it, like these commitments.
• 15:32
  Polly Mertens: Like it's not struggle, suffering, whatever.
• 15:35
  Polly Mertens: It's actually leading you to the life that you say you want.
• 15:39
  Samantha Pruitt: I love it.
• 15:39
  Samantha Pruitt: And that might scare some people when they realize how much power they have.
• 15:43
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, what?
• 15:44
  Samantha Pruitt: I thought I was powerless, you know, and that is not the case.
• 15:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Sure, many people are in circumstances that they cannot influence outside of themselves.
• 15:52
  Samantha Pruitt: And those influences, of course, we deeply respect will influence what they can and cannot access and resource and opportunity and things like that.
• 16:01
  Samantha Pruitt: But this innate sense of freedom that comes with committing to yourself, a relevant of those external things, is really what we're getting at today, right?
• 16:13
  Samantha Pruitt: Uh also it derives a sense of curiosity.
• 16:16
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, because then you start thinking about the what ifs, huh?
• 16:21
  Samantha Pruitt: What if I did do that thing differently?
• 16:23
  Samantha Pruitt: What if I did go this direction?
• 16:25
  Samantha Pruitt: What if I did, you know, try something new today?
• 16:28
  Samantha Pruitt: What if I did pick up the phone and make that phone call?
• 16:31
  Samantha Pruitt: Whatever.
• 16:33
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:33
  Polly Mertens: What if?
• 16:34
  Polly Mertens: What if such a such a freaking great word?
• 16:37
  Polly Mertens: It's a great question.
• 16:38
  Polly Mertens: Yes.
• 16:39
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, it sparks and fuels drive, which is one of your things.
• 16:43
  Samantha Pruitt: You're a very driven person.
• 16:44
  Samantha Pruitt: I said to you earlier in a conversation about something different that you're literally the most driven person I know.
• 16:49
  Samantha Pruitt: And then you're like, oh, okay.
• 16:51
  Samantha Pruitt: But it is one of your superpowers.
• 16:54
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, how do you feel drive impacts your sense of commitment to yourself in your life?
• 17:02
  Polly Mertens: Say that again.
• 17:03
  Polly Mertens: How do I feel drive?
• 17:05
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, how do you use drive as a tool to like be committed to yourself?
• 17:10
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, because it is one of your superpowers, is you're driven.
• 17:14
  Polly Mertens: You know, I think it's just know thyself.
• 17:16
  Polly Mertens: It's like, yeah, I'm that.
• 17:18
  Polly Mertens: You know, it's like uh um, yeah, it feels like part of my thumbprint, if you will.
• 17:23
  Polly Mertens: Um you know, I think I just uh have this insatiable like I was just noticing at the gym this morning as I was like feeling around inside my thoughts and my body for you know our program that we're doing in February.
• 17:39
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, what are the limits of it and who do we want in it and things like that?
• 17:43
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, man, I want people who like want the best for themselves.
• 17:48
  Polly Mertens: They want the best that they can be in their expression in the world, right?
• 17:52
  Polly Mertens: And so that's what drives me is like being the best me that I can be, and in all the ways that that, you know, is an expression of me, right?
• 18:03
  Polly Mertens: Not just like nothing, I think, dims people's light and joy and happiness factor, including my own, in being half-assed, being half of what we were capable.
• 18:14
  Polly Mertens: Like I was just telling you, just you know, I was, I mean, there was a a reason for this, but over the holidays, I took a you know, vacation and just little walks on the beach and stuff.
• 18:25
  Polly Mertens: And then I was like, that just didn't feel very fulfilling, you know, like like I'm capable of more.
• 18:29
  Polly Mertens: Now I get the reason why I did it at the time, you know, looking back, I was like, that was actually I had been running a marathon, call creating a bunch of stuff.
• 18:37
  Samantha Pruitt: Totally.
• 18:38
  Polly Mertens: So that was okay.
• 18:39
  Polly Mertens: Um, and yet, like today, I'm not that was three weeks ago or whatever.
• 18:43
  Polly Mertens: When I'm at the gym, I was like, let's fucking lift some weights today.
• 18:46
  Polly Mertens: Like I was like sweating, and I did these like leg wall sits and I was like burning it, like right to the end.
• 18:53
  Polly Mertens: I was like, Yeah, you know, I walked out of there feeling fantastic, proud of myself, right?
• 18:59
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, totally.
• 19:00
  Samantha Pruitt: It's a way to explore your edges, yeah, right, is that drive.
• 19:05
  Samantha Pruitt: And I I believe that this kind of work sparks that drive in people.
• 19:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Like some people are like, I'm not motivated, right?
• 19:12
  Samantha Pruitt: There's a difference between like again waiting to get motivated to do things.
• 19:16
  Samantha Pruitt: By the way, don't hold your breath because that's a limited resource.
• 19:21
  Samantha Pruitt: So it's just gonna hit you upside the head.
• 19:23
  Samantha Pruitt: Not really a even a thing, right?
• 19:26
  Samantha Pruitt: But to be driven comes from within, and you can spark that drive at any given moment, and it can change from minute to minute.
• 19:34
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, like I'm back at the gym, rehabbing my back and getting back into my strength and all these things, right?
• 19:39
  Samantha Pruitt: And I know a lot about fitness and strength training, so it's a little bit comical to my me laughing at myself about like I'm doing a lot of really baseline, basic re-establishing my foundational strength things that I haven't done in a really long time.
• 19:55
  Samantha Pruitt: And a lot of it's very like traditional strength training and exercises, and I'm just sort of laughing out loud.
• 20:01
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm sure the people around me are like, who's the crazy lady?
• 20:03
  Samantha Pruitt: Doesn't matter, I have my headphones in.
• 20:05
  Samantha Pruitt: But like I can get to the end of that, you know, traditional rep set, a bench press or whatever, and I can do the rep set, or I can go to failure.
• 20:14
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, I can do the eight to 12 reps, or I can be like, I Still go, I'm still going, right?
• 20:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 20:21
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm gonna take to failure.
• 20:23
  Samantha Pruitt: That's my way of operating in the world.
• 20:26
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm here to build muscle, and that's not an easy task for a post-menopausal female, right?
• 20:32
  Samantha Pruitt: So this takes very specific tactics and techniques and whatever.
• 20:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Or I can just do go through the motions without the drive.
• 20:40
  Samantha Pruitt: The drive is taking it to what you're capable of.
• 20:43
  Samantha Pruitt: That's the difference to me.
• 20:45
  Samantha Pruitt: Like it's night and day difference.
• 20:47
  Polly Mertens: And it's the expression of you.
• 20:49
  Polly Mertens: Like that could be poetry, that could be being a mom, that could be and you know, marathons, whatever it is, you know, it's like to your mental edge, your physical edge, your your heart's edge, whatever.
• 21:03
  Polly Mertens: Like, like be like I could, you know, so like just like you said.
• 21:06
  Polly Mertens: So I was doing that wallset this morning, and I could feel my legs wanting to give out, you know.
• 21:10
  Polly Mertens: I was like, ah, and then I sat with that and I went, like you, like we've had enough experience.
• 21:14
  Polly Mertens: I go, yeah, that pain is the pain of growth.
• 21:17
  Polly Mertens: I'm not gonna die, you know, it's not pain like I'm broken something, or you know, whatever.
• 21:22
  Polly Mertens: Like you and I know, like that's a good thing.
• 21:25
  Polly Mertens: And I sat with it and I was like, suck it up, man.
• 21:28
  Polly Mertens: It's fucking I was like, 15 more seconds, bitch.
• 21:31
  Samantha Pruitt: No, no, I didn't say like that, but I was like, or intervals, same thing.
• 21:35
  Samantha Pruitt: I started doing the sprinter intervals again, right?
• 21:38
  Samantha Pruitt: Because like I'm on a bite, I wasn't able to run.
• 21:41
  Samantha Pruitt: So I'm like doing my cardio different.
• 21:42
  Samantha Pruitt: And I'm like, well, how many intervals?
• 21:44
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, well, I should probably do like four intervals, but I'm like, but can I do five?
• 21:48
  Samantha Pruitt: Can I squeeze out another one?
• 21:51
  Samantha Pruitt: Yes, of course I can.
• 21:53
  Samantha Pruitt: Who the hell am I kidding?
• 21:54
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, so these stories that we tell ourselves, right?
• 21:58
  Samantha Pruitt: Or can I write another page, or can I make another phone call, or can I like whatever the thing is for somebody?
• 22:04
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, like it are you capable of more?
• 22:07
  Samantha Pruitt: It's being a full fully committing to your life is being a full expression of who you are.
• 22:13
  Samantha Pruitt: So one of my commitments to myself this year is to be a full expression of myself wherever I go.
• 22:20
  Samantha Pruitt: So when I show up into a place, and that could be me and my bed, by the way, or it could be like I've just had a year of really fucking hard things, dude.
• 22:31
  Samantha Pruitt: And I've shown up to some incredibly insanely difficult places to be.
• 22:36
  Samantha Pruitt: And I'm like, can I be here and be a full expression of myself without needing to kind of like hunker down, a to either protect myself from about what's to happen or to navigate the complexities of the environment and the other people and all of their needs and nuances or whatever.
• 22:55
  Samantha Pruitt: Me just fully owning me is showing up in that full expression and not needing permission, but feeling like, hey, what I have to say, what I have to offer, who I have to be, is div is really delivering value to the world.
• 23:11
  Samantha Pruitt: And like that's that's when you own your life, you can just do that in the boardroom, in the hard conversations with the partner, the spouse, in the with your kids, wherever the hell you go.
• 23:24
  Samantha Pruitt: And I just want that for people.
• 23:26
  Polly Mertens: Wow, so good.
• 23:28
  Polly Mertens: And I I what I hear in that too is like, you know, one of my lines is like self-trust is built in small wins.
• 23:36
  Polly Mertens: Okay.
• 23:37
  Polly Mertens: And what I'm hearing what you're saying is like, in those, like, you know, we avoid challenge.
• 23:44
  Polly Mertens: We think life should be fluffy and soft and never, you know, whatever.
• 23:48
  Polly Mertens: And when challeng like, you know, the one of the biggest ripoffs that we have is we think our life shouldn't have pain and suffering and all this stuff.
• 23:56
  Polly Mertens: It's like we're fucking like, sorry, nobody's getting out of here with joke of all.
• 24:00
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 24:01
  Polly Mertens: So like accept that.
• 24:02
  Polly Mertens: Like, just you know, I mean, in Buddhism, you know, it's like, ah, we're the opponent, you know, like you, you not welcome the challenge, but because it's like when we're talking about going into the gym or you in these hard places, it's like you see who you really are in those difficult moments and what you can grow through.
• 24:22
  Polly Mertens: I don't want to say go through, but like what you can grow through, whether it's sitting in silence when somebody's ripping you a new one, right?
• 24:29
  Polly Mertens: Or you're like being called to do more or do something that you haven't done before, and it like really pushes you to go, like, damn, I gotta show up for this thing, or for my loved ones, or this fucking person sitting in front of me, losing their life, is crushing me, and I'm willing to be there with it, you know, and like those tough moments, it's like and you got through it totally, and you got through it, yeah.
• 24:57
  Samantha Pruitt: So and you can get through it and you will get through it, and you are giving an extraordinary gift to the others in the space, because by you being that person, being willing to bravely be that person, what you do is you give everyone else permission.
• 25:15
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, yeah, to sort of also be like, oh, you know, you're not running.
• 25:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, maybe I don't need to run.
• 25:24
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, you're not backing down.
• 25:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Maybe I don't need to back down.
• 25:27
  Samantha Pruitt: Have you been in those business?
• 25:28
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm sure you have business meetings or board room meetings, you know, where it's like it is not a healthy environment.
• 25:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay.
• 25:36
  Samantha Pruitt: I've been in a bunch of these hard negotiations or whatever.
• 25:38
  Samantha Pruitt: And you're literally like, what in the hell is going on?
• 25:41
  Samantha Pruitt: Like you're almost blown your own mind about how dysfunctional it can get in these spaces.
• 25:46
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 25:47
  Samantha Pruitt: And people just go silent, right?
• 25:49
  Samantha Pruitt: Because the person who is going down in control of the room, yeah, right, the dysfunctional human in the room who's having a breakdown or whatever that's going on there is just trying to dominate all the people in the room.
• 26:04
  Samantha Pruitt: If you can just stand tall in those really hard moments like that, stand up for what you believe, what you know to be true, for what you have to offer, yeah, dude, the power that comes with that and the amount of just self-trust is like so good.
• 26:21
  Polly Mertens: So good.
• 26:21
  Polly Mertens: I wanted to say something here, just uh sort of like I'm not saying sit in that and suffer.
• 26:28
  Polly Mertens: Like we shouldn't, you know, like I'm there, there's I'm not asking you to suffer, I'm asking you to grow through it.
• 26:34
  Polly Mertens: Like go and grow through that thing, whether it was a harder workout or saying something that was hard for you to get out, or hearing something that was hard to hear or do or whatever it is.
• 26:46
  Polly Mertens: I'm not saying take it, but like no, like see how strong you really are, right?
• 26:54
  Polly Mertens: Like, see how strong you really are, because we don't know the limits of how strong we are.
• 26:58
  Polly Mertens: We've, you know, in the brain, like it's like we can't take it.
• 27:02
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, you can, yeah, you can, and be stronger for it.
• 27:06
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, you by no means need to accept these things, right?
• 27:10
  Samantha Pruitt: You can change the circumstances by just standing tall and owning your own truth.
• 27:16
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, yeah, whatever that looks like for you, you know.
• 27:20
  Polly Mertens: And one of the key things, just to reiterate, and you we've talked in the podcast here before, a lot about this with emotional resilience and intelligence is the meaning you're making in that moment, right?
• 27:31
  Polly Mertens: So you and I face, you know, you've you've you've done 10 sets on your weights and you've got more in you.
• 27:38
  Polly Mertens: You don't make it mean I'm good, check out whatever you're like.
• 27:41
  Polly Mertens: No, the meaning is I have more in me.
• 27:43
  Polly Mertens: I'm capable of more, right?
• 27:45
  Polly Mertens: Like me is like, oh, this is starting to get hard doing these wall sits.
• 27:48
  Polly Mertens: Like, okay, I can do hard, right?
• 27:50
  Polly Mertens: Like, so I didn't make it mean give up, stop, quit, whatever.
• 27:53
  Polly Mertens: Somebody's, you know, you're in an uncomfortable situation, define that however you like.
• 27:58
  Polly Mertens: What's the meaning you're assigning in that moment will have you either feel empowered, be empowered by who you're showing up as, or not, right?
• 28:07
  Polly Mertens: So choose the meaning that you're giving those moments.
• 28:10
  Polly Mertens: So much.
• 28:11
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 28:12
  Polly Mertens: We're talking about way more than commitment here.
• 28:14
  Samantha Pruitt: I love this.
• 28:14
  Samantha Pruitt: I know, but these are the reasons that commitment to self, owning one's own life are so important, is these are basically the fruits of the labor.
• 28:24
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 28:24
  Samantha Pruitt: This is all the why to do those things, right?
• 28:27
  Samantha Pruitt: So now let's talk about how to do those things.
• 28:29
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, first of all, it's not, it's it's not a you know, New Year's resolution, right?
• 28:34
  Samantha Pruitt: It's a life strategy.
• 28:36
  Samantha Pruitt: So owning one's life is an actual life strategy.
• 28:40
  Samantha Pruitt: Coming from a growth mindset, a sense of, you know, agency and ownership over how you're gonna live this one precious life and this one precious body is totally a strategy for living.
• 28:52
  Samantha Pruitt: So that's what we want to in part two, is when we talk about how to do it, to be clear this is really the only way to do it is just to make a commitment, right?
• 29:02
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, so first you've got to clarify what and why you want to get up to whatever the things are, right?
• 29:12
  Samantha Pruitt: So in order to clarify, you need to give some time, space, and actually write these things down.
• 29:17
  Samantha Pruitt: Start writing these things down.
• 29:20
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and I wanna, and maybe we're gonna talk about that, but I wanted to talk about prioritizing because part of that's number two.
• 29:26
  Polly Mertens: Okay, okay.
• 29:27
  Polly Mertens: Okay, well, go for it.
• 29:28
  Polly Mertens: So what what when you started to say that I feel like there's also a degree of uncommitting that sometimes needs to happen, right?
• 29:38
  Polly Mertens: So there may be an overcommit, like somebody, you know, with the overload, and la all the whatever they want to language their life sounds like like I can't commit to another thing.
• 29:48
  Polly Mertens: Okay, maybe the first step is where are you committed?
• 29:51
  Polly Mertens: You know, you've committed yourself, but is it really a priority?
• 29:53
  Polly Mertens: Does it line up with who you're truly committed to being or how you want your life to go, or the results that you say you want, or however you want to language that?
• 30:00
  Polly Mertens: It's like, do I let me look around and see?
• 30:03
  Polly Mertens: Because a commitment requires you prioritizing that thing, giving some energy, life force, attention, whatever.
• 30:09
  Polly Mertens: And like you said, it's a consistency thing.
• 30:11
  Polly Mertens: So we can you let's just play off this analogy of working out or something just because it's it's you know it can be universal.
• 30:18
  Polly Mertens: People have movement in their life in whatever degree.
• 30:20
  Polly Mertens: So if you had, or meditation practice or whatever, a relationship.
• 30:23
  Polly Mertens: So if you oh, sorry, if you have that, you realize like, okay, do you have room in your life for that thing, or do you need to decommit first, possibly to some other things, so that you can prioritize it and you can, because the last thing you want is like you just sort of willy-nilly commit to that thing, and then you're like, Oh shit, how how am I ever gonna get to that?
• 30:44
  Polly Mertens: And that's where people get to these not saying no to enough things and they're overcommitted in their life, feeling the burden of it, and they're just depleted, burnt out because and they feel powerless because they're not committed to the things that really matter most to them, right?
• 31:00
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, I would just say then they didn't actually do the work.
• 31:02
  Samantha Pruitt: So before they started and made all these new goals, so a commitment to your life is not setting a hundred new goals for yourself, right?
• 31:11
  Samantha Pruitt: It's like the real work is what do I stand for?
• 31:15
  Samantha Pruitt: What do I believe in?
• 31:16
  Samantha Pruitt: What is my value system?
• 31:17
  Samantha Pruitt: And where do I want to go with this one precious ride?
• 31:22
  Polly Mertens: This is it.
• 31:23
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 31:23
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 31:24
  Samantha Pruitt: So you got to do that.
• 31:26
  Samantha Pruitt: And once you do that, you'll really quickly see, even myself and you, I'm sure, like 20% of the time, and maybe for some people it's 50% of the time, they are doing a bunch of bullshit that means nothing and doesn't align with any of that.
• 31:39
  Samantha Pruitt: But it somehow has crept in.
• 31:41
  Samantha Pruitt: So no judgment, but there will have to be a cleaning of the plate, right?
• 31:45
  Samantha Pruitt: And then, okay, if I have a plate called my life, I have 24 hours in the day like everybody else, 365 days in the year, right?
• 31:53
  Samantha Pruitt: If I get another year of life, that's what I'm gonna get.
• 31:56
  Samantha Pruitt: All right, what am I gonna put on that plate?
• 31:59
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, yeah.
• 32:01
  Samantha Pruitt: Am I gonna just pile it full of french fries?
• 32:03
  Samantha Pruitt: Am I gonna pile it full of a meaningless job, a relationship that doesn't work, uh, loneliness and confusion and lack of whatever?
• 32:13
  Samantha Pruitt: Or am I gonna really, with great intention, take my limited resources called time and energy, and put the things back on the plate that care the most, that I care the most about, that I stand for, that I value the most.
• 32:26
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and I'm gonna call myself on, you know, where this showed up for me recently, and maybe this will at the end of this story may have us to go into the next one, I have a feeling, is um so I had the 75 hard, 75-day challenge, right?
• 32:39
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and had like all these things, and and then I would see myself like social posting is one of them, right?
• 32:45
  Polly Mertens: And you you you know in the background how I feel about that, right?
• 32:49
  Polly Mertens: It's like not your favorite thing.
• 32:52
  Polly Mertens: Because it feels like I'm pissing in the wind.
• 32:54
  Polly Mertens: That's so where where I wanted to go with this is like, do you do you believe it's gonna get you closer to the result that you're after, right?
• 33:01
  Polly Mertens: And so I committed to it, and I wasn't like like the energy it was taking for me to do it is because I was out of alignment, mind, body, spirit, intuition, whatever you want to call it, like head, heart, and in and gut were not a hell yes for that thing.
• 33:16
  Polly Mertens: It was like, you know, because for me, time is like the most precious thing ever, right?
• 33:22
  Polly Mertens: Relationships, time, whatever.
• 33:24
  Polly Mertens: And so if I'm committing time, like you said, like minutes, hours, whatever, social media, it ain't just like 15 minutes.
• 33:30
  Polly Mertens: People are like, oh, you can just post something in 15 minutes.
• 33:32
  Polly Mertens: And I like have asked a lot of people in my own life, it's like I'll hear them say hours.
• 33:38
  Polly Mertens: And I'm like, if I can be doing that, if that's what I'm getting up to for hours, do I think I'm gonna get the result I'm after?
• 33:43
  Polly Mertens: And this could be just a bullshit test.
• 33:45
  Polly Mertens: Like, you know, uh, some people choose whatever they choose for a fitness goal, a creativity goal, a travel goal, whatever, like for money goal, you know, like, oh, I'm gonna save $50 a month or whatever it is.
• 34:00
  Polly Mertens: Like, is it is that thing, do you believe in it?
• 34:03
  Polly Mertens: It's gonna get you where you want to go.
• 34:05
  Polly Mertens: Because if you don't, and I've just saying for myself, like I was sabotaging.
• 34:10
  Polly Mertens: I was like, eh, because I I committed, but then I didn't believe in it taking me where I wanted to go.
• 34:15
  Polly Mertens: So that could be just something to look for.
• 34:18
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, well, that's very common in health and fitness, right?
• 34:21
  Samantha Pruitt: People do all kinds of shenanigans.
• 34:23
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, I have seen and heard the most bizarre things ever in my whole lifetime of being in the health and fitness space, but like it's like going to, I'm gonna commit to go to the gym, but I'm going to the gym and I'm doing what what am I doing at the gym?
• 34:38
  Samantha Pruitt: Right.
• 34:38
  Samantha Pruitt: There's no if you're gonna put an ounce of sweat, time, energy, financial resources also into these this building of your life, this building of your life, right?
• 34:52
  Samantha Pruitt: And your life goals, aspirations, then you should absolutely know that a your strategy is sound, right?
• 35:01
  Samantha Pruitt: And this is part of the how to do it.
• 35:03
  Samantha Pruitt: Actually get clear on what you're trying to achieve, and then get a sound strategy with a timeline on how you're going to get there.
• 35:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Right.
• 35:12
  Samantha Pruitt: And it doesn't mean it's automatically going to happen because we don't have a magic wand, but you're at least knowing, fully knowing that, hey, I if I take these steps over this timeline, there's a high probability I will achieve that goal.
• 35:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 35:27
  Samantha Pruitt: You might not actually know what that means.
• 35:29
  Samantha Pruitt: You might need to get outside resources, coaches or help, or do some research or read or take a class or whatever to know what the right path is, the actual strategy forward and the steps forward.
• 35:41
  Samantha Pruitt: But that's part of this work, is like figure that out.
• 35:45
  Samantha Pruitt: So if I decide that my top five values are this, and I'm gonna achieve these things by owning my life, and I'm gonna work on these five things that I say I value so much.
• 35:55
  Samantha Pruitt: What are the actual steps?
• 35:57
  Polly Mertens: Exactly.
• 35:58
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, how am I gonna get there?
• 36:00
  Samantha Pruitt: And by the way, for me to get there is not gonna be what it takes Polly to get there or any other person.
• 36:05
  Samantha Pruitt: My path is unique, yeah.
• 36:07
  Samantha Pruitt: And it doesn't mean someone can't help you create that path and hold you accountable to that path and give you some support and tools around it.
• 36:14
  Samantha Pruitt: For sure, you know, people like us exist, but like you need your unique path, and then you need to believe in it 1000%.
• 36:23
  Samantha Pruitt: That's commitment.
• 36:27
  Polly Mertens: Definitely, yeah.
• 36:27
  Polly Mertens: Well, and that's where that's where the you know, so it starts with a moment of decision, commitment, right?
• 36:34
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and where the rubber meets the road is you like have a plan for this.
• 36:38
  Polly Mertens: Like, how's this gonna happen?
• 36:39
  Polly Mertens: Right.
• 36:40
  Polly Mertens: And then the final is like, well, there's phases of this, let's say, right?
• 36:44
  Polly Mertens: When that's not what this is all about, but it's like then you you know look at what do I need to do, how much is it gonna cost, take time, whatever.
• 36:52
  Polly Mertens: I line that out, and then you put it into your calendar, and then you get up to doing it, you know, like all of all that's the downwind of you know, downstream um implementation.
• 37:03
  Polly Mertens: But the commitment is where we're focusing on is like I've got to commit to that thing and then commit to the things doing the things that it says that I say that I want for that thing, right?
• 37:13
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, totally, and then be ready for the shit to go terribly wrong.
• 37:18
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, change, change is I call, you know, it's it's challenging in the beginning, it's messy in the middle, and it's beautiful in the end, right?
• 37:25
  Polly Mertens: Like anything you get up to, it's totally yeah, yeah.
• 37:28
  Polly Mertens: So expect it to so you know, a dear friend of mine, you know, it's like in the world of habits, you know, you can miss a day, right?
• 37:35
  Polly Mertens: But don't miss more than two, because then you start to like have all sorts of excuse, whatever, right?
• 37:39
  Polly Mertens: So never, you know, just look into habits around like the committing and and how to implement that.
• 37:44
  Polly Mertens: But don't expect a perfect path.
• 37:47
  Polly Mertens: Perfect, you know, exactly.
• 37:48
  Polly Mertens: Don't expect perfect, and don't expect it to be easy either.
• 37:51
  Polly Mertens: Like, nope, it might not, especially in the beginning, you gotta you're reorienting your life, you're reorienting your mind, you're shifting some things that we're going in a different direction, in a new direction.
• 38:02
  Polly Mertens: You know, there's there's gonna be some bumpiness, whatever that looks like.
• 38:05
  Polly Mertens: Some short term, some a little bit longer, you know.
• 38:08
  Samantha Pruitt: I love that um visual of reorienting, right?
• 38:12
  Samantha Pruitt: It's like the compass of your life and reorienting the direction you're gonna go.
• 38:16
  Samantha Pruitt: And you know, you mentioned your mind.
• 38:19
  Samantha Pruitt: Your mind is really going to run the freaking show.
• 38:23
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, like it's hilarious the shit that your mind will tell you.
• 38:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Totally.
• 38:29
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay.
• 38:29
  Samantha Pruitt: I always say I have the evil twin and then the good twin, right?
• 38:32
  Samantha Pruitt: Like, and the evil twin is gonna tell me all kinds of craziness, dude, based on the 56 years of my life journey and even whatever ancestral stuff I happen to bring along in my DNA package.
• 38:45
  Samantha Pruitt: So there is a lot of stuff there that are these stories that my evil twin wants to tell me is happening and will be happening.
• 38:53
  Samantha Pruitt: And, you know, generally it's you know, fear-based or lack or penny penny, the sky's falling, or the undeservingness.
• 39:01
  Samantha Pruitt: It's generally pretty negative shit.
• 39:04
  Samantha Pruitt: Totally.
• 39:04
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, totally.
• 39:05
  Samantha Pruitt: But I can see her for what she is when she waltzes on into the room uninvited, and you know, take her to task and redirect myself.
• 39:14
  Samantha Pruitt: But that is because we have built the mental muscles, the mindset for a life of agency and commitment and growth and all of the things that we love to do.
• 39:27
  Samantha Pruitt: We don't expect it to be perfect, but we're like we're we're understanding that the stories we tell ourselves will therefore impact the thoughts and the feelings that will drive the actions.
• 39:40
  Samantha Pruitt: And if my thoughts and feelings are misaligned, my actions will also be misaligned.
• 39:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Right?
• 39:48
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, the metaphor that was coming to me that I've often used in habit change, you know, some people think that they're zipping along the ocean in a speedboat, and they go, Oh, I want to go in that new direction, and the speedboat just turns on a dime.
• 39:59
  Polly Mertens: And I go, You're actually more like in a and depending on what it is in your life, and I'm just using it as a metaphor, you're actually more likely in a cruise ship.
• 40:08
  Polly Mertens: And those things don't turn very on a dime, right?
• 40:11
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm glad you didn't say the Titanic.
• 40:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Uh-huh.
• 40:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay.
• 40:13
  Samantha Pruitt: No.
• 40:14
  Polly Mertens: You're you're you're the captain of a cruise ship, you're in a carnival cruise ship.
• 40:18
  Polly Mertens: You're on a cruise.
• 40:18
  Polly Mertens: Christing through life, like doo-doo doo, like this is the direction of your life, and you say, Oh, let's suddenly head to the Bahamas, right?
• 40:26
  Polly Mertens: And said, And it's like a cruise ship takes a little something to get going in a new direction.
• 40:30
  Polly Mertens: It will, but it's not a speedboat.
• 40:32
  Polly Mertens: It's not just like you make a sharp right.
• 40:34
  Polly Mertens: You know, it's very uncomfortable for the contents of a cruise ship if they take a hard write.
• 40:39
  Polly Mertens: So no, we won't be doing that, but that's you know, often what it looks like in the course of a life is more like a cruise ship, a gentle right instead of a sharp right.
• 40:50
  Samantha Pruitt: So this is where it can be helpful in your strategy building, your steps to uhwards achieving, you know, your step, your committed steps towards achieving the goals.
• 41:00
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, having somebody maybe help you understand the nuances around this because it is different for everybody.
• 41:07
  Samantha Pruitt: And we both trained, you know, hundreds, thousands of people at this point, like some people can swing a pretty good pendulum, you know, and other people are the all or nothings.
• 41:18
  Samantha Pruitt: Like, there's just different personalities, different ways of being in the world.
• 41:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 41:21
  Samantha Pruitt: So helping them devise a plan where they can stack wins for themselves.
• 41:24
  Samantha Pruitt: And some people that's really, really slow.
• 41:27
  Samantha Pruitt: Micro moments, micro decisions of getting towards a new way of being.
• 41:33
  Samantha Pruitt: And for other people, I tend to be one of those.
• 41:36
  Samantha Pruitt: I like to break everything and start walk over.
• 41:39
  Samantha Pruitt: Like I generally am like, whoop, right?
• 41:42
  Samantha Pruitt: I like a clean slit.
• 41:43
  Samantha Pruitt: I I'm a relatively aggressive person like that.
• 41:47
  Samantha Pruitt: So just knowing who you are or having somebody help you understand, hey, I see this is where you really excel.
• 41:54
  Samantha Pruitt: Like this is a thing that works for you, you know, getting there in these baby steps or busting everything wide open, you know, whatever it might be.
• 42:02
  Samantha Pruitt: But figure that out and then figure out how to just consistently show the hell up and do it.
• 42:09
  Polly Mertens: You know, and one thing I would say is um I was talking with someone yesterday and they were talking about um how do I say this?
• 42:16
  Polly Mertens: So like the husband is stuck, not really motivated.
• 42:21
  Polly Mertens: That's where the one that sent me, hey, can you send me a motivational video like to get my husband, you know, to stop watching that's awesome videos until 3 a.m.
• 42:29
  Polly Mertens: or something like that.
• 42:29
  Polly Mertens: I was like, and then I said, Well, you know, I'm a coach, like I can help you with this too.
• 42:33
  Polly Mertens: And she's like, Oh, well, this and I go, okay, well then you're deciding to stay, you know.
• 42:37
  Polly Mertens: So, like, what do you really want?
• 42:39
  Polly Mertens: You know, like here's some like candy, or here's like a fast food item that's not, you know, good luck with watching one video and expecting that to, you know.
• 42:48
  Polly Mertens: So, like, what are you really committed to?
• 42:50
  Polly Mertens: Like, are you like, and would it serve you?
• 42:54
  Polly Mertens: You know, and and I would say a coach and support, like you're talking about, is speed, right?
• 43:00
  Polly Mertens: It's it's that reinforcement, that speed that we need, because that little you talked about that, you know, you and I have a lot of experience with the devil and angel on our shoulders, right?
• 43:09
  Polly Mertens: That mindset shifting.
• 43:11
  Polly Mertens: So we know what it's like when it shows up and how to redirect that.
• 43:15
  Polly Mertens: If you haven't faced it, or if you haven't done a great job, like pay for that ability for someone to like coach you through those pivots that uh getting myself to do the thing, right?
• 43:27
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, against that.
• 43:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Again, that's a way of people beating themselves.
• 43:31
  Samantha Pruitt: I should be able to do this, I know better.
• 43:34
  Samantha Pruitt: I this, I that, I whatever their story is.
• 43:38
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, you're a human, not helpful, just as imperfect as us, and life is fucking hard, dude.
• 43:45
  Samantha Pruitt: There's a lot of things going on, and we have a lot of responsibilities.
• 43:48
  Samantha Pruitt: And in the current time and space that we're all living in, it's pretty chaotic on a good day.
• 43:56
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay.
• 43:57
  Samantha Pruitt: So don't feel bad that you cannot like muscle this out on your own or somehow just force yourself into submission to get towards a goal.
• 44:08
  Samantha Pruitt: First of all, like you just said, maybe it's not even the right goal.
• 44:12
  Samantha Pruitt: But definitely the path or the map that we would help guide them on a map based on their own uniqueness, right?
• 44:18
  Samantha Pruitt: Where are they gonna get that map?
• 44:21
  Samantha Pruitt: If they couldn't get it for the last 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60 years, or however old they are, right?
• 44:27
  Samantha Pruitt: Like maybe they don't have the map.
• 44:29
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 44:29
  Samantha Pruitt: And once they have the map and they have clarity, they might be a crusher.
• 44:33
  Samantha Pruitt: Execution, 100%, off you go.
• 44:36
  Samantha Pruitt: It's possible.
• 44:37
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 44:38
  Polly Mertens: I noticed this.
• 44:39
  Polly Mertens: I was talking with someone about who's starting a school, like they want to start an online school, and never done anything like this before.
• 44:46
  Polly Mertens: Like, never, you know, started a business.
• 44:48
  Polly Mertens: Never, and I was just like, you know, so do you have a business plan?
• 44:51
  Polly Mertens: You know, do you have a whatever?
• 44:53
  Polly Mertens: And because I was hearing in the conversation, he was like, as he's telling me, like, well, I went to this person, they said this, and this person said that.
• 44:59
  Polly Mertens: So, like, his web guy's telling him to do this, and his marketing guy's telling him, and and he just feels like a pinball in a machine, you know.
• 45:05
  Polly Mertens: And I was like, Okay, so like, where's your business plan?
• 45:08
  Polly Mertens: You know, and do you have a marketing plan?
• 45:10
  Polly Mertens: So, like, you're the curator, you're you know, or like or you're working with a coach, somebody that's like helping you get the the strategy, get it action in place.
• 45:19
  Polly Mertens: So those people, you're directing them instead of you're just bouncing back and forth.
• 45:23
  Polly Mertens: Like, that's what I was like, you go to the marketing person, they tell you that's a priority.
• 45:26
  Polly Mertens: You go to the web guy, and he says, I need this first.
• 45:28
  Polly Mertens: And you're like, you're the one that's got the hey guys, come to my come to my symphony and I'm gonna orchestrate.
• 45:35
  Polly Mertens: Like, you guys work for me.
• 45:37
  Polly Mertens: This is what we're doing here.
• 45:38
  Polly Mertens: I'm like, I know how this music is gonna sound.
• 45:40
  Polly Mertens: Let's now let's play.
• 45:42
  Polly Mertens: Or we're building a house, you got a blueprint, right?
• 45:45
  Polly Mertens: So, like, get that.
• 45:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, yeah, no one else can be the expert in your life.
• 45:49
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, you know, again, that's so incredibly disempowering in that um scenario, like you're saying, with business, but people do it in their personal lives too, right?
• 45:57
  Samantha Pruitt: Like, my parents must know what's best for me.
• 46:00
  Samantha Pruitt: What in the hell?
• 46:03
  Samantha Pruitt: I didn't know what's best for any of my children.
• 46:05
  Samantha Pruitt: They need to figure that shit out.
• 46:07
  Samantha Pruitt: I mean, I can just be teaching them things, but I'm not determining their life course.
• 46:12
  Samantha Pruitt: That's ludicrous, or my grandchildren for that matter, right?
• 46:15
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 46:15
  Samantha Pruitt: Um, one of the tips and uh tricks that I have done that I have felt has worked for me, curious what your experience is, is the act as if.
• 46:24
  Samantha Pruitt: So I wanted to become, you know, I wasn't a triathlete or an endurance athlete, right?
• 46:31
  Samantha Pruitt: I was a personal trainer and I barely, I was a couch potato, sorry, and then I became an ex-couch potato, and then I found fitness, became a personal trainer, and then became a running coach, and then a triathlete and an endurance coach, all those things, right?
• 46:44
  Samantha Pruitt: So I went from I was none of those things, but along the path of becoming those things all the way up until today, I would just act as if, right?
• 46:55
  Samantha Pruitt: So, okay, well, how do those endurance athletes or those triathletes, what do they do?
• 47:01
  Samantha Pruitt: Where do they hang out?
• 47:02
  Samantha Pruitt: How do they eat?
• 47:03
  Samantha Pruitt: What kind of equipment do they use?
• 47:04
  Samantha Pruitt: What sort of tra like, okay, I'm gonna act as if I'm gonna start doing those things.
• 47:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Or when I went from triathlon into ultra, ultra running, right?
• 47:12
  Samantha Pruitt: Totally different world.
• 47:13
  Samantha Pruitt: These are very foreign worlds.
• 47:15
  Samantha Pruitt: You literally Mars and Saturn, you know?
• 47:19
  Samantha Pruitt: How can I become one of those people now?
• 47:21
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, I don't want to be one of these people anymore.
• 47:22
  Samantha Pruitt: I want to be one of those people.
• 47:24
  Samantha Pruitt: I start acting as if, oh, I'm an ultra runner now.
• 47:28
  Samantha Pruitt: I really just went from one day because somebody said to me, Hey, you did an Iron Man.
• 47:33
  Samantha Pruitt: I think you can run an ultra.
• 47:35
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm like, I don't think so.
• 47:36
  Samantha Pruitt: And they're like, Yeah, I'm pretty sure if you can go 140.6 miles, you probably can run this 15 miler.
• 47:42
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, sign me up.
• 47:44
  Samantha Pruitt: What do I do?
• 47:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Just start doing these things.
• 47:48
  Samantha Pruitt: Basically, just show up and acting as if.
• 47:51
  Samantha Pruitt: So I think that can be very powerful too, even in business.
• 47:54
  Samantha Pruitt: I started many businesses not knowing what the hell I was doing.
• 47:58
  Samantha Pruitt: I still don't really know what the hell I'm doing, right?
• 47:59
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm figuring it out because it's changing all the time.
• 48:01
  Samantha Pruitt: So, again, allowing myself to evolve in the process and acting as if.
• 48:07
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 48:08
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, what it reminds me of, um, I call it internalized modeling, right?
• 48:13
  Polly Mertens: Or um, so acting as if that person already, right?
• 48:17
  Polly Mertens: So I think what's important in that is you you have a model.
• 48:22
  Polly Mertens: You see something.
• 48:24
  Polly Mertens: Like, yeah, you can sort of like, I think we would, I mean, you could act as if you what you think they're doing or what you think of try of, you know, whatever, whoever you want to become.
• 48:36
  Polly Mertens: But I think if you can have a model, then you're acting as if what you're they're modeling for you the actions, the behaviors, the ways of being, things like that, right?
• 48:45
  Polly Mertens: When you don't have that, I think you can flounder a little bit.
• 48:48
  Polly Mertens: You know, you can act like this and act like that.
• 48:50
  Polly Mertens: Am I doing it?
• 48:50
  Polly Mertens: Am I doing it?
• 48:51
  Polly Mertens: You know, is this it?
• 48:52
  Polly Mertens: Is it how they do, you know, and it could, you know, it could be um disempowering because you don't feel like you're necessarily, you know, you're going in too many directions, you're not necessarily going in the direction, right?
• 49:02
  Polly Mertens: So internalizing the modeling, acting as if that person, like, oh yeah, you know, like people who are this, I see some traits, right?
• 49:11
  Polly Mertens: And I'm a big fan of listening to what those people say.
• 49:14
  Polly Mertens: Because it because their beliefs come out in what they speak.
• 49:17
  Polly Mertens: So you know, identifying with what they say, if you if you like them and admire them, obviously, you know, if you want to.
• 49:25
  Samantha Pruitt: Yes, please pick somebody that you admire.
• 49:26
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 49:27
  Samantha Pruitt: And also don't pick a hundred people, because then it's very confusing because a hundred people are doing it all differently.
• 49:32
  Polly Mertens: Yeah.
• 49:32
  Samantha Pruitt: Right.
• 49:32
  Samantha Pruitt: So yes.
• 49:34
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, because then their beliefs will like they filters out for, you know, like not only in the behaviors that they're doing, you can model some of the behaviors, but you can also listen to the way that they speak about themselves, the way things are.
• 49:45
  Polly Mertens: That can be a fast track for you to like beginning to identify, like, oh, they believe this, not this, you know, like people who save money versus people who overspend money.
• 49:55
  Polly Mertens: Like, what are the thoughts that they're thinking?
• 49:57
  Polly Mertens: You know, what if I adopt some of those beliefs and take on those rituals, practices, and whatnot, acting as if, as if you said, um, okay, if I mod embody that, okay.
• 50:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, I agree.
• 50:08
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah, and that comes back to what you said in the beginning is you better have a compelling vision.
• 50:13
  Samantha Pruitt: And card, that compelling vision can be like, hey, I greatly admire whatever the hell, Oprah Winfrey, for goodness sake.
• 50:19
  Samantha Pruitt: Pick something crazy that's wild, that you may never meet her, right?
• 50:23
  Samantha Pruitt: She doesn't have to be hanging out with me.
• 50:25
  Samantha Pruitt: But I could say, well, what kind of life has she led?
• 50:29
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, what is her legacy?
• 50:32
  Samantha Pruitt: What kind of legend is she?
• 50:33
  Samantha Pruitt: Like, what are all the cool things that this woman's doing in the world?
• 50:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Because I really admire that, right?
• 50:39
  Samantha Pruitt: And so they can be guideposts, light posts, light houses.
• 50:42
  Polly Mertens: My favorite question for that that I've discovered recently in some work I was doing is I was doing it about myself, you know.
• 50:49
  Polly Mertens: So I was looking at like things that I had done and was like, and what does that mean about me?
• 50:53
  Polly Mertens: Okay, because so I could interpret, like, okay, I did X, Y, Z.
• 50:57
  Polly Mertens: Let's say, you know, you know, ran a race or something like that.
• 51:00
  Polly Mertens: Oh, I did a Spartan race.
• 51:02
  Polly Mertens: Like, okay, well, what does that say about me?
• 51:03
  Polly Mertens: What does that mean about me?
• 51:04
  Polly Mertens: And I learned through that exercise of like looking at myself, I'm like, oh, I can take that for anyone.
• 51:10
  Polly Mertens: Uh that means I'm dedicated.
• 51:12
  Polly Mertens: That means I, you know, will do the whatever, like blah, blah, blah, blah, all those things.
• 51:16
  Polly Mertens: So even if you can't be around that person, I'm sure you could listen some ways, like you can't hear their beliefs, but you could internalize and interpret from the ways that they're being.
• 51:25
  Polly Mertens: We know what someone's experience in the world, what they're demonstrating, we can still interpret.
• 51:31
  Polly Mertens: So you can grab some meaning from that.
• 51:33
  Polly Mertens: That could be helpful for you.
• 51:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Totally, totally, totally.
• 51:36
  Samantha Pruitt: And hanging around people that are doing the epic shit you want to get up to is paramount.
• 51:41
  Polly Mertens: A thousand percent.
• 51:43
  Samantha Pruitt: Paramount.
• 51:43
  Samantha Pruitt: If you're gonna continue to hang out with people who are not achieving or leading a life that you are remotely interested in, guess what your life will look like.
• 51:53
  Samantha Pruitt: It's just how it works.
• 51:56
  Polly Mertens: I would have zero ultra things on my wall, you know, in my house here in my or in my office.
• 52:01
  Polly Mertens: I have the the medals from the races that you've helped me get after.
• 52:06
  Polly Mertens: Because you're like, hey, I think you could do that.
• 52:08
  Polly Mertens: Hey, there the come do this with me.
• 52:10
  Polly Mertens: Hey, you know, and I was like, I have those thanks to you because you're in my life, you know, and so that's where the people that were around either, you know, get around them, get up to it.
• 52:19
  Polly Mertens: But proximity matters, man.
• 52:22
  Samantha Pruitt: So proximity matters a hundred percent.
• 52:25
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay, and then some final things are we've talked a hundred times about stacking wins, right?
• 52:29
  Samantha Pruitt: So small wins, big wins, whatever.
• 52:32
  Samantha Pruitt: And if there's setbacks, accept it and move the hell on.
• 52:36
  Polly Mertens: Right?
• 52:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Like obviously, it's not going to be perfect, nothing is perfect.
• 52:40
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 52:41
  Polly Mertens: The space shuttle is off course like 80, 90 percent of the time it's on the way to the moon, you know.
• 52:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, that's a good one.
• 52:48
  Samantha Pruitt: It's correcting, correcting, correcting, it's off course like 90% of the time.
• 52:51
  Samantha Pruitt: They're like course, correct, you know.
• 52:55
  Samantha Pruitt: So that's a good one.
• 52:58
  Samantha Pruitt: That's a good one.
• 52:59
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, be relentless.
• 53:02
  Samantha Pruitt: Well, you're the queen of this.
• 53:04
  Samantha Pruitt: Relentless.
• 53:05
  Samantha Pruitt: Okay.
• 53:06
  Samantha Pruitt: Relentless pursuit of your life, like relentless pursuit of just owning this, fully owning this.
• 53:16
  Samantha Pruitt: You know, and sometimes for me, it's a complete disaster, absolutely complete disaster.
• 53:22
  Samantha Pruitt: I don't give a shit.
• 53:23
  Samantha Pruitt: I was relentless, I did the best of my abilities given all the circumstances.
• 53:28
  Samantha Pruitt: Yeah.
• 53:29
  Samantha Pruitt: And I come out the other side and I'm still like, yeah, I'm good.
• 53:32
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, and you know, and I would say I want to tie this to the experience that you went through recently, losing your brother, right?
• 53:39
  Polly Mertens: Like, relentless doesn't mean, you know, we can easily see where you're relentless in running, you know, trail, dah, dah, dah, dah, whatever.
• 53:47
  Polly Mertens: But like who you were being for your brother and in the human and the family and stuff like that, the relentlessness showed up in you being perfectly imperfect, having, you know, tearful days, have whatever, but like relentless in being there, like and and fully present, and whatever it took, and riding the wave of emotions, riding the wave of schedule changes, and getting up at midnight, and you know, all the things that it took, you know.
• 54:13
  Polly Mertens: So that's what it sometimes looks.
• 54:17
  Samantha Pruitt: I thought during that whole experience, just towards the end of his life, the last couple of weeks, really I felt like I'm literally in an ultra, like I'm using all of the skill sets that I have.
• 54:28
  Samantha Pruitt: A, not sleeping, you know, just being resourceful, just being all the things I know I'm capable of being, because I built all of those skills back there.
• 54:39
  Samantha Pruitt: And being relentless in the pursuit of giving 100% of everything I have available is really what we're talking about in any given circumstance, and people want to do that for people that they love, people want to do that for really important critical moments in their life and in the lives of others.
• 55:02
  Samantha Pruitt: They want to be 110% in all in.
• 55:06
  Samantha Pruitt: But if you don't build that skill set, you won't have it when it counts.
• 55:13
  Samantha Pruitt: And that is a tragedy.
• 55:15
  Polly Mertens: And I think the things we talked about earlier about uncommitting and committing, you know, prioritizing what you are committed to, because when it matters, when it's hard, when it's like you got to show up, like you you recognize whether you do it or you don't do it, is are you really committed to it?
• 55:30
  Polly Mertens: Like, are you voting for that thing?
• 55:32
  Polly Mertens: Like if that thing matters to you, it's a it's what part of your why, your whatever, it's important, it has meaning to you.
• 55:38
  Polly Mertens: You will do it even when it's hard and difficult and uh inconvenient and uncomfortable and stuff like that.
• 55:44
  Polly Mertens: It's like this means something to me, and you give it that meaning, but that's when you see, like, did you commit to the things that are meaningful to you?
• 55:52
  Polly Mertens: Right, yeah, and if you blow it off, it's like, yeah, I I'm not gonna do that.
• 55:56
  Polly Mertens: It's like doesn't mean that to you then.
• 55:58
  Polly Mertens: Okay, then like choose your choose your commitment, right?
• 56:02
  Samantha Pruitt: Every uh decision and action is a vote.
• 56:06
  Polly Mertens: Definitely to who you're being, yeah, yeah.
• 56:09
  Samantha Pruitt: And then my last thing is to really know your worth because at the foundation of all of this and to be able to do this most critical work of your life is to understand your innate value.
• 56:23
  Samantha Pruitt: You're just by existing, you are valuable and worthy.
• 56:27
  Samantha Pruitt: So you don't need to give yourself away or give up your dreams or sacrifice your life or sacrifice your health or do things that are not really what you want to be doing.
• 56:41
  Polly Mertens: And I would say you're valuable and it just goes back to a little bit like if you're overcommitted, you may be undervaluing yourself because you think you have to do more than you have to do to gain value.
• 56:56
  Polly Mertens: You might want to look at, are you trading something there, right?
• 57:00
  Polly Mertens: Like, is there a trade going on?
• 57:01
  Polly Mertens: Like, oh, I'm doing this for this person because they'll like me or whatever.
• 57:04
  Polly Mertens: Like when you fully value yourself, like you actually have fewer commitments, like you have ones that are really key and really critical.
• 57:11
  Polly Mertens: Like these are the people, and these are not the people, and this is the thing, and that's not the thing.
• 57:15
  Polly Mertens: You have fewer things and you're really into them, right?
• 57:20
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, exactly.
• 57:22
  Polly Mertens: You get it?
• 57:23
  Polly Mertens: Exactly.
• 57:23
  Polly Mertens: Love it, love it.
• 57:26
  Samantha Pruitt: What's your one thing?
• 57:27
  Samantha Pruitt: I'm gonna read at the end a little um statement that I was given this a long time ago.
• 57:32
  Samantha Pruitt: Jeez Louise.
• 57:33
  Samantha Pruitt: Oh, maybe 30 years ago.
• 57:37
  Polly Mertens: This is Did I say while we were recording?
• 57:39
  Polly Mertens: Because I wanted to make sure, because one of the key things I wanted to say is like being stuck or unstuck is a lack of a disorder.
• 57:45
  Polly Mertens: Did we talk about that?
• 57:45
  Polly Mertens: Or what did we talk about that before we hit record?
• 57:48
  Polly Mertens: Uh say it again.
• 57:49
  Polly Mertens: I'll so okay, so um, you know, I I talked a little bit about like having a vision.
• 57:56
  Polly Mertens: So when you have a compelling vision and then you're committed to it, right?
• 57:58
  Polly Mertens: Like that gives you that momentum.
• 57:59
  Polly Mertens: So when people are stuck, or you know, like they're not moving forward, right?
• 58:04
  Polly Mertens: They haven't made a decision and they haven't committed to it.
• 58:07
  Polly Mertens: So if you have a ah, I'm stuck, I'm not moving forward.
• 58:10
  Polly Mertens: Like if you feel like you're just sort of treading water in something or you're resisting something, you haven't made well you if you're not doing it, you're actually making a decision not to do it.
• 58:18
  Polly Mertens: But you know, there's got to be something, so like break that shit up and make a decision.
• 58:22
  Polly Mertens: So the stuckness is a lack of like either clarity, commitment, I'm doing it, not doing it, whatever.
• 58:28
  Polly Mertens: Either say you're doing it or not, and then fucking move on.
• 58:31
  Polly Mertens: Because you're just you're stuck because you're you're not fucking decided and in it.
• 58:35
  Polly Mertens: Because if you were, stuff would be moving forward.
• 58:37
  Polly Mertens: You'd be like, I'm getting up to it.
• 58:39
  Polly Mertens: So I just want to be sure that we we don't, and then guess what?
• 58:42
  Polly Mertens: Momentum and results happen.
• 58:44
  Polly Mertens: And the I think the human um animal that we are, whether it's our brain or spirit or something like that, really one of the key things, yes, key to happiness, whatever, relationships, is progress.
• 58:57
  Polly Mertens: The human, like we are growth-seeking beings, whether you agree with that or not, test it out for yourself.
• 59:04
  Polly Mertens: Growth-seeking beings enjoy progress, right?
• 59:07
  Polly Mertens: Commonplace, not moving forward.
• 59:10
  Polly Mertens: Like, you know, you go on vacation for a week, like okay, right?
• 59:14
  Polly Mertens: Like, I remember I had like I went on a 90-day whatever, and I was not, I mean, I was up to like fun stuff or whatever.
• 59:21
  Polly Mertens: And then I was like, I'm gonna get up to something, you know, like like getting up to something.
• 59:25
  Polly Mertens: And that you talk about driven it, but it was like the pursuit of something meaningful to you, creating progress along the way, is satisfying, is fulfilling to us as human spirits.
• 59:36
  Polly Mertens: So human just how we evolved.
• 59:38
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah, right.
• 59:40
  Samantha Pruitt: We didn't stay in one place, we didn't do one thing every like we were constantly just out of survival, operating that way.
• 59:47
  Samantha Pruitt: And it's also just where joy is at in the rich experiences, yeah.
• 59:53
  Samantha Pruitt: It's not in the comfort zone, people, yeah, yeah.
• 59:57
  Polly Mertens: Get outside of that.
• 59:57
  Polly Mertens: So I think that would be my one thing is like if you are feeling stuck, if you're feeling unmotivated, something's not moving in your life, you feel whatever.
• 1:00:06
  Polly Mertens: Pick something, make a decision about it, uncommit to something, maybe, and go harder in on something else.
• 1:00:11
  Polly Mertens: Like go more deeper, like so you can actually do the things that are meaningful to you, and then you'll start to feel momentum.
• 1:00:16
  Polly Mertens: And guess what?
• 1:00:17
  Polly Mertens: I bet you feel better.
• 1:00:18
  Polly Mertens: I bet you feel better.
• 1:00:19
  Polly Mertens: Better in a lot of areas.
• 1:00:20
  Polly Mertens: Oh yeah.
• 1:00:21
  Polly Mertens: All right.
• 1:00:22
  Polly Mertens: So let's hear this yummy quote you have.
• 1:00:24
  Polly Mertens: It's so good.
• 1:00:26
  Polly Mertens: Okay, you ready?
• 1:00:27
  Polly Mertens: I think I'm I'm gonna I'm I I don't know because you told me it's gonna like have me like jumping up and down.
• 1:00:32
  Polly Mertens: So I don't know.
• 1:00:34
  Samantha Pruitt: All right, let's do it.
• 1:00:35
  Samantha Pruitt: Until one is committed, there is hesitant hesitancy, the chance to draw back is always in effectiveness.
• 1:00:46
  Samantha Pruitt: Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elemental truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans.
• 1:00:59
  Samantha Pruitt: That the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves to.
• 1:01:07
  Samantha Pruitt: All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.
• 1:01:13
  Samantha Pruitt: A whole stream of events issue from that decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings, and material assistance which no man or woman could have ever dreamed would come their way.
• 1:01:31
  Samantha Pruitt: Whatever you can or dream you can, begin it now.
• 1:01:37
  Samantha Pruitt: Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.
• 1:01:43
  Samantha Pruitt: Begin it now.
• 1:01:45
  Samantha Pruitt: It's my favorite part.
• 1:01:47
  Samantha Pruitt: Boldness, boom, genius in it, magic.
• 1:01:50
  Samantha Pruitt: Dude, it's true.
• 1:01:51
  Samantha Pruitt: You and I talked about being in the flow, and we've had periods of our time lifetime and projects and things where we've been so in the flow, I mean, crushing it, and it's because everything was aligned.
• 1:02:08
  Polly Mertens: And it started, like I said, with a decision and like getting up to it.
• 1:02:11
  Polly Mertens: Like once one confidently decides, as you said, like I would say get lined up with that thing because, like I said, I had, oh, I said I'm gonna do the social media, but I wasn't lined up with it.
• 1:02:20
  Polly Mertens: And I see that that like eroded my my power, my fortitude, my willingness to do it on the daily, and put it in my calendar, and da da da da, you know, like I write it down and it's like, ah, so like pick a thing, line up with it, believe that you can do it, and then get it after it, like your life depends on it in a like an inspiring way, not like kill yourself, but like give it all you got and see how, see what the best of it can be for you, right?
• 1:02:46
  Polly Mertens: Because the universe will deliver the goods.
• 1:02:49
  Polly Mertens: It's true, yeah.
• 1:02:50
  Polly Mertens: And so will you.
• 1:02:52
  Polly Mertens: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:02:53
  Polly Mertens: And you'll feel like meaning will come because you'll you'll actually start to see yourself.
• 1:02:59
  Polly Mertens: Like, like I've had moments where like I see what I'm up to, like a third party seeing my like, check me out, you know.
• 1:03:05
  Polly Mertens: Like, wow, you like have those moments where you see sort of like the virtual reflection of yourself getting up to the thing that you said that was mattered to you, being at your bedside of somebody that matters to you, and that's all you're doing right now, or you're you know, you're just grinding away at the miles, or whatever it is you're doing, and you see yourself, you get that vision of yourself, and you're like, wow, I'm freaking doing it, you know?
• 1:03:29
  Polly Mertens: It's so empowering, so empowering.
• 1:03:31
  Polly Mertens: So, so good.
• 1:03:33
  Polly Mertens: I'm so inspired by this already.
• 1:03:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Look at me.
• 1:03:36
  Samantha Pruitt: Let's go get up to it.
• 1:03:40
  Samantha Pruitt: So good.
• 1:03:40
  Samantha Pruitt: What do you want to remind beautiful humans?
• 1:03:42
  Samantha Pruitt: Woo! How your life feels is more important than how it looks.
• 1:03:48
  Polly Mertens: And every day is your opportunity to find your awesome.