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Szamanka FULL RECAP - Andrzej Zulawski 1996 review · Midnight Movie Theatre

0:19
Speaker 1: Well, welcome back to Midnight Movie Theater. Tonight we're going
0:22
Speaker 1: to be talking about an Andre Zulawski movie, uh, Zhamanka, Zhamanka,
0:28
Speaker 1: I believe is how you pronounce it. Zulawski has kind
0:31
Speaker 1: of had a resurgence in the last five, maybe 10 years.
0:35
Speaker 1: His movie Possession has, uh, gained a lot of attention
0:39
Speaker 1: in the last five to 10 years, I'd say. And
0:42
Speaker 1: I think it's kind of shining a light on some
0:44
Speaker 1: of his other work. It definitely caught my attention and
0:46
Speaker 1: made me want to check out some of his other movies.
0:49
Speaker 1: Before we get into this movie, I just want to
0:51
Speaker 1: mention that a lot of his films have been released
0:56
Speaker 1: through Mondovision. And other than that, they can be kind
1:00
Speaker 1: of hard to find. Like, Shamanco was not streaming anywhere,
1:03
Speaker 1: from what I could tell. But Mondovision was releasing a
1:08
Speaker 1: lot of his movies in these excellent-looking... Almost like box sets.
1:13
Speaker 1: This one and some of the other ones that I have,
1:15
Speaker 1: they're like textured. Like it's like felt. This one is
1:19
Speaker 1: another one. And really, oh shit, I dropped it. That's
1:23
Speaker 1: fucking $ 300 down the drain. No, I'm just kidding. Actually,
1:26
Speaker 1: I found Shemanka. I did have two copies of it
1:30
Speaker 1: because I found one for like $ 7 on eBay, the
1:33
Speaker 1: Mondovision release. And I just bought another copy of it
1:37
Speaker 1: before that. But they come with like these cool ass
1:40
Speaker 1: booklets and postcards and stuff like that. Just give you
1:43
Speaker 1: a quick peek at it. I honestly haven't gone through
1:45
Speaker 1: this one too much. Oh, fuck. I just ripped it.
1:49
Speaker 1: Son of a bitch. Fuck. Now I'm going to have
1:51
Speaker 1: to get another one. No, I just... rip the envelope
1:55
Speaker 1: I guess but yeah they come with like all this
1:56
Speaker 1: cool extra shit look at this fucking postcards of the
2:00
Speaker 1: lady that's in the movie what's her name I I
2:03
Speaker 1: wanna Petri I wanna touch uh dead mummy's tits that's
2:08
Speaker 1: her name I'm fucking dumbass god damn it anyway yeah
2:12
Speaker 1: so some like cool shit some behind the scenes stuff
2:15
Speaker 1: some extra bonus material there's like a whole ass booklet
2:18
Speaker 1: I I don't know. I'll have to look at that sometime. Shamanca,
2:21
Speaker 1: a movie I never would have heard of if Possession
2:24
Speaker 1: didn't become such a popular movie in the last few years,
2:27
Speaker 1: at least among horror fans. I just thought that was
2:30
Speaker 1: worth pointing out because I know a lot of people
2:32
Speaker 1: are really into collecting physical media right now, collecting DVDs
2:37
Speaker 1: and Blu-rays and shit like that. This is one that
2:40
Speaker 1: I don't see on a lot of people's shelves, or
2:42
Speaker 1: at least these Mondovision releases. This is the one for
2:47
Speaker 1: his movie, La Morbarak. There's one for possession like this.
2:52
Speaker 1: And they're all like different colors and they come in
2:54
Speaker 1: these big ass cool cases with all this extra shit.
2:57
Speaker 1: And the one for possession I feel like is the
2:59
Speaker 1: most expensive one. I always see that one for like
3:02
Speaker 1: around $ 80 to $ 100. But really you can kind of
3:05
Speaker 1: catch these for fairly cheap. Like I said, I bought
3:08
Speaker 1: the Shemanka one for like $ 7 or something because it
3:11
Speaker 1: was in an eBay auction. So if you're into collecting shit...
3:17
Speaker 1: physical shit and uh keep your eyes out for these
3:20
Speaker 1: motherfuckers because like this one i believe it says on
3:23
Speaker 1: the package here there is only uh yeah 2 000
3:26
Speaker 1: copies of this released and i think they were planning
3:29
Speaker 1: on doing some of his other movies like um the
3:33
Speaker 1: silver globe and the devil and um the third part
3:37
Speaker 1: of the night but for whatever reason a lot of
3:39
Speaker 1: those releases stopped this is another one that i have
3:42
Speaker 1: the la femme public i don't know what the fuck
3:44
Speaker 1: that is i have not seen this movie yet I
3:46
Speaker 1: haven't watched, I still have quite a few Zulowski movies
3:49
Speaker 1: to watch. I've seen like his earlier movies and this
3:54
Speaker 1: one now. So not really going in any particular order,
3:58
Speaker 1: but eventually I do want to watch them all. It's just,
4:01
Speaker 1: it's one of those things where like his style of
4:03
Speaker 1: movies are a lot. Once you get the tone of
4:07
Speaker 1: his movies, like after I watched Possession, I went back
4:10
Speaker 1: and watched his first few other movies and they're all
4:14
Speaker 1: pretty much set at that tone. And some of them
4:17
Speaker 1: are even more heightened than Possession is. I feel like
4:20
Speaker 1: people are like, God damn, that's a lot of yelling
4:23
Speaker 1: and screaming and running around and a lot of drama
4:26
Speaker 1: and shit like that. I feel like his other movies
4:28
Speaker 1: sometimes are even more intense than that one. So it's
4:32
Speaker 1: kind of a lot. It's kind of a lot to
4:33
Speaker 1: get into. And I feel like you have to prep
4:36
Speaker 1: your mind almost to be like, okay, this is going
4:40
Speaker 1: to be a different tone. Than just like if I'm
4:43
Speaker 1: popping in like a movie night watch or something. You
4:47
Speaker 1: know what I mean? You're probably not going to watch
4:48
Speaker 1: this one with your parents in the living room. Unless
4:51
Speaker 1: you want to watch 20 sex scenes with your mom
4:54
Speaker 1: and dad. This movie was released in 1996. It takes
4:58
Speaker 1: place in Warsaw. We follow around a student who we
5:02
Speaker 1: only know her as the Italian. And she's not Italian.
5:05
Speaker 1: I don't even think she's supposed to be Italian in
5:08
Speaker 1: the movie. But for some reason that's her nickname in
5:11
Speaker 1: the movie. I don't know. I don't know why. But
5:13
Speaker 1: she's basically we just see her right away. She's kind
5:16
Speaker 1: of like running around. She's looking at like a deli
5:19
Speaker 1: or something like that. I can't remember exactly where she is,
5:22
Speaker 1: but she's kind of like looking through like this little
5:24
Speaker 1: food market thing. And she just looks like she fucking
5:27
Speaker 1: hates all the food there. She's just making like gross
5:29
Speaker 1: faces at the food and stuff and kind of acting
5:31
Speaker 1: weird right off the bat. There's some really great shots
5:34
Speaker 1: of her going through the subway. There's a lot of
5:36
Speaker 1: cool graffiti in the background. One of the things in
5:40
Speaker 1: all of Zulawski's movies that I've seen is that there's
5:43
Speaker 1: going to be great scenery, on-site shooting and stuff like that,
5:47
Speaker 1: and some really cool camera work as far as that goes.
5:51
Speaker 1: I feel like they spend a lot of time just
5:52
Speaker 1: really putting out the vibe, if you know what I'm saying.
5:56
Speaker 1: So we just kind of follow around the Italian for
5:58
Speaker 1: a while. She is a student. She bumps into some
6:01
Speaker 1: guy who is a professor at a university. He's an
6:07
Speaker 1: what is he? He's an anthropology professor at this university.
6:10
Speaker 1: And they just like run into each other. And he's
6:13
Speaker 1: just like, hey, I've got a room for rent. And
6:16
Speaker 1: she's like, that's cool. I need to rent a room.
6:19
Speaker 1: I don't know. As far as I could tell, there
6:22
Speaker 1: wasn't any prior arrangement to them meeting. They just kind
6:25
Speaker 1: of bump into each other. We also see that his
6:27
Speaker 1: brother is a priest, just because. She's like, yeah, I
6:32
Speaker 1: need a place to stay. And he's like, sweet, I
6:34
Speaker 1: got a place to rent. Would you like to come
6:36
Speaker 1: check it out? And she's like, yeah, I guess so.
6:39
Speaker 1: He's like, all right, cool. Come with me to this place.
6:42
Speaker 1: We can check it out. There's an old lady that
6:45
Speaker 1: lives there. I think she's like fucking blind or something.
6:48
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think she's, I don't know if
6:50
Speaker 1: she's a tenant. I don't know if he like owns
6:52
Speaker 1: the apartment. I honestly didn't know what the situation was.
6:55
Speaker 1: I thought he was renting out his flat to her
6:58
Speaker 1: that he was renting from this blind lady. But I
7:02
Speaker 1: feel like when I go to Wikipedia and start reading
7:04
Speaker 1: about it, it doesn't really say that. So I don't know.
7:07
Speaker 1: I'm just going to do my best here. I'm going
7:09
Speaker 1: to do my best just trying to remember what the
7:11
Speaker 1: hell was going on in this movie because it is...
7:14
Speaker 1: It's a lot to take in, and there's a lot
7:16
Speaker 1: of distracting imagery going on in this thing that'll just, like,
7:19
Speaker 1: pull you right out of the fucker. So anyway, he's
7:22
Speaker 1: just like, uh, he's like, here's the apartment, what do
7:24
Speaker 1: you think about it and shit? And she's just like,
7:27
Speaker 1: looks good, looks like an apartment, I think I could
7:29
Speaker 1: live here. And he just, like, gets up in her
7:31
Speaker 1: fucking face right away and just starts rubbing her lipstick
7:34
Speaker 1: off and just, like, ripping her clothes off and shit. Like,
7:37
Speaker 1: I don't think there was any dialogue, he's just like...
7:39
Speaker 1: Get this fucking lipstick off your fucking face. And she's
7:42
Speaker 1: just kind of like, what? She almost looks like she
7:45
Speaker 1: goes catatonic while this is happening. Like she's just like, oh, damn,
7:49
Speaker 1: this guy's going to rape me now or something. And
7:51
Speaker 1: she just kind of like, you know, lays down. I
7:54
Speaker 1: thought he did rape her because then they they bang
7:57
Speaker 1: it out right here in the middle of this brand
7:59
Speaker 1: new apartment. And I was like, damn, that's crazy. You know,
8:03
Speaker 1: the movie just kicks off with this young lady getting
8:06
Speaker 1: raped by this, you know, middle-aged man. That's the other
8:10
Speaker 1: thing is like right off the bat, you're like, oh, damn.
8:12
Speaker 1: I think the actress in real life was like 19
8:14
Speaker 1: or 20 or something like that, like really young. And
8:17
Speaker 1: the guy is clearly about 50, I'd say. So I
8:22
Speaker 1: don't know. So right away, I was just kind of like, oh,
8:24
Speaker 1: this is kind of fucking icky, but whatever. What are
8:29
Speaker 1: we doing here, B? I'm just going to start reviewing
8:32
Speaker 1: Avengers movies after this because I don't want to talk
8:35
Speaker 1: about this shit anymore. But then after they nut or
8:40
Speaker 1: he busts, I guess I started maybe realizing, oh, I
8:45
Speaker 1: think maybe he didn't rape her. I don't know. I mean, obviously,
8:50
Speaker 1: it's a movie. This is a pretty understated movie, I
8:54
Speaker 1: feel like, as far as they don't really explain anything
8:57
Speaker 1: out loud, which I appreciate, you know, they kind of
8:59
Speaker 1: just let you figure it out, let the viewer decide.
9:02
Speaker 1: And afterwards I was like, I think she's into it.
9:05
Speaker 1: It's either that or like, she's so like broken that
9:09
Speaker 1: she's just kind of like, I don't give a fuck.
9:11
Speaker 1: I'm just going to go along with it. But they
9:13
Speaker 1: do end up like in a relationship. I don't know.
9:16
Speaker 1: Not that that makes it any better if that's what
9:18
Speaker 1: just happened. Anyway, it's a movie. We're just going to
9:21
Speaker 1: get right to that. And so, yeah, like I said,
9:24
Speaker 1: he's a teacher. His brother's a priest. Also, we've got
9:28
Speaker 1: some cats living in this apartment. Quite a few cats
9:30
Speaker 1: live in here. So the anthropology or archaeology teacher, whatever
9:34
Speaker 1: the fuck this guy's teaching at school, he digs up
9:37
Speaker 1: an old ass mummy and he's just like obsessed with it.
9:40
Speaker 1: And he's just and the mummy looks awesome. Like the
9:43
Speaker 1: the effects in this movie are top notch. I was
9:46
Speaker 1: I was pretty blown away. Like this mummy clearly just
9:49
Speaker 1: looks like a guy laying there with like a bunch
9:51
Speaker 1: of makeup on while they're pulling him out of the
9:53
Speaker 1: dirt and with like prosthetics on his face and stuff
9:57
Speaker 1: like that. Just looked fantastic. It didn't look like a reptile.
10:00
Speaker 1: dummy or anything like that or some like bullshit, you know,
10:03
Speaker 1: fake ass mummy. It looked really good. Then I don't
10:06
Speaker 1: remember the teacher's name. Oh, the teacher's name is Michael.
10:08
Speaker 1: So Michael is instantly like super infatuated with this mummy.
10:14
Speaker 1: Of course he would be, I guess, because this is
10:16
Speaker 1: like his fucking job. And he probably just found something that's,
10:20
Speaker 1: you know, really interesting. I guess if you find a
10:22
Speaker 1: mummy and you're like a fucking archaeology teacher or whatever,
10:26
Speaker 1: or fucking, what is this guy? Dirt digger. If you're
10:29
Speaker 1: like a dirt digger teacher, then you're probably just like,
10:31
Speaker 1: hell yeah, dude, I just hit the fucking jackpot. I'm
10:34
Speaker 1: going to fucking quit my stupid teaching job and fucking
10:37
Speaker 1: write a book or something and go on tour. You know,
10:41
Speaker 1: he's probably going to go on tour with the mummy
10:43
Speaker 1: and fucking do drugs with it and stuff like that.
10:46
Speaker 1: Cause he does find that the mummy has like a
10:48
Speaker 1: bunch of drugs with them. And he's like, Oh, this
10:51
Speaker 1: isn't just a regular ass mummy. This is a shaman.
10:54
Speaker 1: And so then he, he's like obsessed with this fucking
10:56
Speaker 1: thing after that. But after that, we spend some more
10:59
Speaker 1: time with the Italian. And one thing that we see
11:02
Speaker 1: throughout the movie is that she's just kind of running
11:05
Speaker 1: into people. Like her, all of her movements are very chaotic. She's, like,
11:09
Speaker 1: in public, always just, like, crashing into people, but also
11:12
Speaker 1: just constantly being sexually harassed. Like, anytime she gets into, like,
11:16
Speaker 1: public transit or something like that, there's always some guy just, like, doing, like,
11:20
Speaker 1: the pussy-eating sign at her, and, like, guys are just, like,
11:23
Speaker 1: grabbing her butt all the time and stuff like that,
11:25
Speaker 1: and she's, you know, pretty freaked out by it, I guess,
11:27
Speaker 1: but she just, like, looks mad. I don't... I don't know.
11:32
Speaker 1: She just, like, is always just fucking running around like crazy, dude. I...
11:38
Speaker 1: And after that, she like runs over by a lake
11:42
Speaker 1: and I was, it doesn't really say what she's doing.
11:44
Speaker 1: It kind of looks like she might be like squatting
11:46
Speaker 1: down to take a shit or something. I don't really
11:48
Speaker 1: get that part either. But then she runs into her
11:51
Speaker 1: boyfriend's job. So even though she's having sex with this
11:54
Speaker 1: teacher guy now, she has a boyfriend. His name is
11:57
Speaker 1: Martin and he works at like a fucking school for
12:00
Speaker 1: like mentally handicapped people or whatever. Like there's just like,
12:04
Speaker 1: and every scene is chaotic. They go into this school
12:07
Speaker 1: and there's just like kids running around, like bumping into
12:10
Speaker 1: each other and fucking slamming beds into the wall and
12:12
Speaker 1: stuff like that. And like, crashing toy airplanes into each
12:15
Speaker 1: other and shit and just yelling the whole time but
12:17
Speaker 1: while that's going on they're also like having dialogue back
12:21
Speaker 1: and forth and shit and it's just kind of like
12:23
Speaker 1: dude i don't know this is like i'm getting my
12:25
Speaker 1: senses are being overloaded right now kind of as the
12:28
Speaker 1: movie goes on you just learn that every character in
12:31
Speaker 1: this movie fucking sucks like the italian sucks The teacher sucks.
12:35
Speaker 1: Her boyfriend sucks. She's kind of like giving him shit
12:38
Speaker 1: because he works with mentally handicapped kids. And he's just like, yeah,
12:42
Speaker 1: I don't give a fuck about him. You know, and
12:44
Speaker 1: he's like, I don't give a fuck about these kids.
12:48
Speaker 1: Let's go to the back and bang. And she's just like,
12:51
Speaker 1: I honestly don't care. Do whatever, you know, bang me.
12:55
Speaker 1: Don't bang me. Whatever, Martin. And so Martin does decide
13:00
Speaker 1: to bang her and he puts her on like a
13:03
Speaker 1: wheelie table, like almost like a hospital table or something.
13:07
Speaker 1: And he so stupid, dude. He just like he pushes
13:12
Speaker 1: it up against one wall so that like his feet
13:14
Speaker 1: are touching the wall, you know. And then he puts
13:17
Speaker 1: his wiener in, and then he kicks off that wall
13:21
Speaker 1: and slams into the other wall with his wiener in her.
13:24
Speaker 1: And he's just, like, staring at her, like, you know,
13:27
Speaker 1: humping her and shit. And she just looks pissed. She just, like,
13:31
Speaker 1: has a straight face. straight face on, just staring at him,
13:34
Speaker 1: just super blank. And he's just like, oh, he's like,
13:38
Speaker 1: you know, do you like this? And she just says, no.
13:40
Speaker 1: It's like, well, you did just do like a table
13:44
Speaker 1: ladder chair move on her while your wiener was in her.
13:47
Speaker 1: I don't know if anybody would like that. I don't know.
13:51
Speaker 1: Just fucking slammed her into the wall with your little
13:54
Speaker 1: prick inside her. So that is An interesting choice there, Martin.
13:59
Speaker 1: So yeah, so she's like, this shit sucks. Dick game week.
14:04
Speaker 1: And then we find out that her mom is also
14:06
Speaker 1: super mean to her. And you kind of get a
14:08
Speaker 1: little background of her home life after that, where like
14:12
Speaker 1: you see her mom just fucking hates her. And apparently
14:14
Speaker 1: she kind of like left home without really explaining what
14:18
Speaker 1: she was up to. And now she shows back up
14:21
Speaker 1: or something. And her mom's like, oh, get the fuck
14:23
Speaker 1: out of here. I hate you and stuff like that.
14:25
Speaker 1: And she's like, I hate you too, mom. And there's
14:28
Speaker 1: like a little kid there, too. I think it's like
14:30
Speaker 1: her sister's kid or something. And her mom's like, oh,
14:32
Speaker 1: run off to fucking college and get pregnant so I
14:35
Speaker 1: can take care of your kid, too, you stupid bitch.
14:38
Speaker 1: And she's just kind of like, all right. And so
14:41
Speaker 1: she steals a bunch of money from her mom and
14:43
Speaker 1: leaves and like trashes the place, too. It's just kind
14:46
Speaker 1: of like, all right. There is a really cool shot
14:49
Speaker 1: during this where like her mom's out back fucking folding
14:52
Speaker 1: laundry or something, you know. And the Italian is in, like,
14:57
Speaker 1: one of the bedrooms just, like, trashing it. And there's, like,
14:59
Speaker 1: a little toddler sitting in the crate just watching her.
15:03
Speaker 1: And you're watching it from the toddler's POV. So it
15:06
Speaker 1: was just kind of neat. A lot of good close-up shots, too,
15:11
Speaker 1: that are just really uncomfortable. Like, they're just basically framing...
15:15
Speaker 1: only the face. And it's it builds the tension even more,
15:18
Speaker 1: I feel like. So after that, she goes over to
15:21
Speaker 1: the the teacher's work. He's like giving a lecture or
15:25
Speaker 1: something on the mummy that he just found. And she
15:28
Speaker 1: goes into the middle of it. And, you know, there's
15:30
Speaker 1: all these like display cases and stuff in glass. It
15:33
Speaker 1: looks like a museum, basically. She goes in there and
15:35
Speaker 1: just starts licking the fuck out of the glass. And
15:38
Speaker 1: then he's just basically like, OK, class dismissed, I guess.
15:43
Speaker 1: My freaky ass new girlfriend's in here just licking everything. Fantastic.
15:48
Speaker 1: They start banging after that. Pretty much any scene where
15:52
Speaker 1: they like bump into each other is going to end
15:54
Speaker 1: with them banging. But this is like... So the last
15:56
Speaker 1: time she's like catatonic when they're banging. This time she's
16:00
Speaker 1: like stemming out. Basically her whole character is like be frantic,
16:06
Speaker 1: stem out, be a spaz, and yell at everyone and
16:10
Speaker 1: stuff like that. And you know... It's pretty much a
16:13
Speaker 1: requirement for most female characters in a Zulasky movie, at
16:18
Speaker 1: least most of them that I've seen anyway. I think
16:20
Speaker 1: he has some more like subtle movies that are just
16:23
Speaker 1: like straight dramas. But for some reason, I just keep
16:25
Speaker 1: landing on the ones where people are just fucking going
16:28
Speaker 1: nuts the whole time. After they get done banging, he
16:30
Speaker 1: like takes her to a dinner with some of his friends,
16:33
Speaker 1: his like intellectual friends, I guess, his college friends, you know.
16:37
Speaker 1: And they're all just like sitting around like talking about
16:39
Speaker 1: smart shit, talking about fucking books they read and fucking
16:42
Speaker 1: shit like that and math problems and stuff, you know,
16:45
Speaker 1: just really dorking out all over the fucking place. And
16:49
Speaker 1: they start kind of like giving her shit about how
16:51
Speaker 1: she's not smart. They're like, oh, yeah, what have you read?
16:54
Speaker 1: You know, fucking bullshit, fucking like they make fun of
16:58
Speaker 1: her or something where they're like, oh, yeah, I bet
17:00
Speaker 1: you've read a lot of Madonna or something like that. Like,
17:03
Speaker 1: I bet you just listen to music like dumb music,
17:06
Speaker 1: stupid ass. shit and so she she just kind of
17:09
Speaker 1: leans into it she gets up and starts like just
17:11
Speaker 1: sticking her tongue out and yelling and knocking all the
17:14
Speaker 1: shit off the dinner table and they're just like hey
17:17
Speaker 1: you're get the fuck at it you know she runs
17:19
Speaker 1: off and they're just like what the hell's her problem
17:21
Speaker 1: and he he catches up with her and he's just
17:23
Speaker 1: like you're a fucking moron bitch fuck you it's like
17:26
Speaker 1: okay the hell's going on here she goes home after
17:29
Speaker 1: that and just starts eating cat food like straight out
17:32
Speaker 1: of the bowl like she just you know drops down
17:34
Speaker 1: on all fours and starts eating the cat food So
17:37
Speaker 1: whatever the she's like, I'll have what he's having. And
17:39
Speaker 1: she just dips down there. So eating that shit. So
17:43
Speaker 1: she got the cat food in her tummy and ice
17:46
Speaker 1: cubes all over her face, which is good. It's probably good.
17:51
Speaker 1: Then we see her go to one of her college classes.
17:54
Speaker 1: I think she's going for like engineering. And she, of course,
17:57
Speaker 1: has a creepy classmate who instantly falls in love with her.
18:00
Speaker 1: And he's just like, hey, I'm going to follow you
18:03
Speaker 1: around and shit. And he does. And that's pretty much
18:05
Speaker 1: his whole. The whole point of him in the movie
18:08
Speaker 1: is just to be a creepy fucking guy who likes
18:11
Speaker 1: to watch her and follow her around on a scooter.
18:14
Speaker 1: After class, her uncle catches up with her and he's
18:17
Speaker 1: just like, listen up, motherfucker. I know that you stole
18:20
Speaker 1: that money from your mom. Now you're going to have
18:22
Speaker 1: to work at the meat factory. And so he takes
18:24
Speaker 1: her to the meat factory and just makes her like
18:27
Speaker 1: chop up, like grind up chickens and stuff like that.
18:30
Speaker 1: You just see like chickens running around. And then you
18:33
Speaker 1: just see like this huge machine in the middle and
18:35
Speaker 1: they're just like fucking stuffing them in there and fucking
18:37
Speaker 1: blood and shit shooting out of the backside. And she's
18:40
Speaker 1: just kind of like, damn, that's not good. That's not
18:42
Speaker 1: something I'd like to do for my job. I want
18:45
Speaker 1: to be an engineer. And it just is like even
18:48
Speaker 1: more jarring because I feel like she's just kind of
18:51
Speaker 1: in like glam makeup the whole time, like super bright
18:54
Speaker 1: red lipstick. And, you know, she just kind of looks
18:57
Speaker 1: out of place because she looks like a like a
19:00
Speaker 1: model or something, basically. And I think that's probably why
19:03
Speaker 1: she was picked for this movie. She wasn't an actor
19:06
Speaker 1: before this. I guess Zulowski just happened to bump into
19:09
Speaker 1: her somewhere, and he was just like, you look like
19:12
Speaker 1: you should be in one of my movies. And so
19:14
Speaker 1: she did. The thing is, though, after that, she never
19:19
Speaker 1: did another movie. I guess she had a really bad
19:21
Speaker 1: time with this movie. And I haven't, I know I've said,
19:24
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot of banging in this. She
19:27
Speaker 1: is naked in most of the movie, like, and not
19:32
Speaker 1: in a super flattering way. You know what I like?
19:35
Speaker 1: Like I said, during the sex scenes, I feel like
19:37
Speaker 1: she's just like stemming out and making like crazy faces
19:40
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. And a lot of times she's
19:42
Speaker 1: just like soaking wet, like covered in slime and sweat
19:45
Speaker 1: and stuff. And she'll just be like fucking doing the
19:48
Speaker 1: craziest shit. And it's just kind of like yeah okay
19:52
Speaker 1: okay then that's how you like the buck i see
19:55
Speaker 1: just like to get fucking completely covered in slime and
19:58
Speaker 1: fucking start spazzing out start spurging out over here shit
20:03
Speaker 1: so yeah i feel like explaining what happens in this
20:06
Speaker 1: movie isn't going to make much sense Because after this,
20:10
Speaker 1: she just goes home. The teacher is like waiting for
20:13
Speaker 1: her at her apartment. And for some reason, she's holding
20:16
Speaker 1: a like a chicken body, but it has a baby
20:18
Speaker 1: doll head shoved into the body like the chicken has
20:21
Speaker 1: a baby doll head. Now, the props for this movie
20:24
Speaker 1: are something that would be in Freddy Got Fingered or
20:28
Speaker 1: something like that. Like you would expect this to be
20:30
Speaker 1: like Tom Green shit, but it's just in like a
20:33
Speaker 1: serious drama erotic thriller, erotic drama slash like horror movie
20:39
Speaker 1: kind of. It's kind of got some horror stuff going
20:41
Speaker 1: on here, especially as we go on. So I've already
20:44
Speaker 1: said she had or has a boyfriend or whatever, Martin.
20:47
Speaker 1: The teacher has a fiance. He is like steady, ready
20:51
Speaker 1: to get married to this other lady who's like a
20:54
Speaker 1: really successful like business lady or something like that. And
20:58
Speaker 1: it's kind of like, yeah, of course this guy's probably
21:00
Speaker 1: getting married. He's 50 years old. He should not be...
21:05
Speaker 1: Spending all of his time banging this 19 year old girl.
21:08
Speaker 1: He needs to be getting fucking married, dude. He should
21:11
Speaker 1: have been married already. What's this fucking guy thinking? Fucking asshole. Fucking, uh,
21:16
Speaker 1: what's his name? Michael. Fucking dipshit. God damn. Definitely don't
21:22
Speaker 1: be banging the 19 year old that comes home with
21:24
Speaker 1: a chicken body and a baby doll head sticking out
21:27
Speaker 1: of the fucking chicken head or chicken body like it's
21:30
Speaker 1: got a baby doll head for a head. If you're 50,
21:34
Speaker 1: you should know better, okay? I don't feel bad for
21:37
Speaker 1: this guy at all. He's a fucking idiot. So anyway,
21:39
Speaker 1: he's like, hey, you know what would be like the
21:41
Speaker 1: next step in our relationship, our secret thing that we
21:45
Speaker 1: got going on here? Why don't you come to my
21:47
Speaker 1: wife's birthday party for some fucking reason? And she's just like,
21:53
Speaker 1: I honestly will do anything because I'm a crazy bitch.
21:56
Speaker 1: And so she goes, she puts her food on the
21:59
Speaker 1: floor at the party. for some reason, and just starts
22:03
Speaker 1: like dancing fucking crazy in front of some guy, this
22:06
Speaker 1: guy who's like a, uh, I thought this guy was
22:08
Speaker 1: just going to be a random guy in the movie
22:10
Speaker 1: because he kind of seems like it. He's friends with
22:12
Speaker 1: Michael or whatever. Later on, we'll find out this guy
22:14
Speaker 1: has some sort of like mob connection that will come
22:17
Speaker 1: into play. Um, yeah, yeah, I don't know. We'll get
22:20
Speaker 1: into that soon enough, I guess. So she just starts,
22:23
Speaker 1: you know, she's she's she's stemming out again on the
22:26
Speaker 1: dance floor. And everybody's just kind of like, damn, who
22:29
Speaker 1: the fuck is that? You know, everyone there is like
22:32
Speaker 1: middle aged and she's just like fucking tweaking out bad.
22:35
Speaker 1: Like who brought the fucking meth head, dude? She can
22:37
Speaker 1: bust and move. So she runs off because, you know,
22:41
Speaker 1: she's like, damn it. You know, I'm at my I'm
22:45
Speaker 1: at my secret lover's wife's birthday party tonight. I guess
22:49
Speaker 1: I'm just going to explore the house and smear cake
22:52
Speaker 1: all over the place. She like starts shoving cake everywhere
22:55
Speaker 1: and fucking making a mess. And, um, and then she
22:59
Speaker 1: starts stealing shit. It's just like, what, Michael, what the
23:02
Speaker 1: hell are you thinking? Big dog. You're just bringing a
23:05
Speaker 1: crazy unstable stranger into your wife's house to just like run,
23:10
Speaker 1: run a fucking muck or whatever. So abruptly after that,
23:13
Speaker 1: we just find out that the teacher's brother, the priest, uh,
23:17
Speaker 1: hangs himself. So, um, he's like, damn, I gotta go.
23:21
Speaker 1: I got, I know you just fucking smeared cake all
23:23
Speaker 1: over my wife's house or, you know, one of our
23:25
Speaker 1: houses or whatever, but I got to go check on
23:27
Speaker 1: my fucking dead brother. And she's just like, yeah, I'm
23:32
Speaker 1: going to come with you. She, I don't know if
23:33
Speaker 1: she says much throughout the movie. Now that I'm thinking
23:36
Speaker 1: about it, I think she just kind of goes with him. And, um,
23:39
Speaker 1: so maybe, maybe the only sympathetic character is Michael's fiance
23:44
Speaker 1: because she seems pretty cool. She seems pretty normal. and
23:48
Speaker 1: really just has her life ruined because Michael's a piece
23:52
Speaker 1: of shit. This lady's fucking nuts. After this scene, they're
23:57
Speaker 1: doing something. They're going on this trip together. She just
24:00
Speaker 1: runs over to this guy that doesn't have any legs
24:03
Speaker 1: and flips him out of his chair. I can't remember.
24:06
Speaker 1: I think it's unprovoked, if I remember. I might be
24:09
Speaker 1: wrong about that. I guess I probably should watch this
24:12
Speaker 1: movie again at some point. There's so much going on
24:15
Speaker 1: that I just can't process it all. It's just like,
24:19
Speaker 1: why did that happen? No reason. Just keep going. Keep
24:22
Speaker 1: the movie going. But I think that's kind of the
24:23
Speaker 1: point of the movie. It's one of those movies that's
24:25
Speaker 1: just like, it's a weird one. And so after the
24:28
Speaker 1: teacher sees that act of kindness, where she just basically,
24:33
Speaker 1: where she just 360 flipped this guy with no legs
24:37
Speaker 1: out of a chair, the teacher decides, you know what?
24:39
Speaker 1: I think she might be the one. I'm just going
24:42
Speaker 1: to move in with her. That seems like the obvious
24:45
Speaker 1: next step. You know, I have a fiancee. why don't
24:49
Speaker 1: I just move in with this crazy bitch that has
24:52
Speaker 1: a headless chicken at her house and flips, you know,
24:55
Speaker 1: disabled people out of their chairs and shit. Makes sense
24:59
Speaker 1: to me. After that, they bang again. And then he
25:02
Speaker 1: does like, he starts doing drugs. So because Michael is
25:05
Speaker 1: becoming more and more obsessed with the shaman character that
25:09
Speaker 1: he finds, he's also is just like, You know what
25:12
Speaker 1: else would probably be good for my middle-aged life right now?
25:15
Speaker 1: Doing fucking drugs. So he's just getting fucked up all
25:18
Speaker 1: the time on like mushrooms and who knows what else.
25:21
Speaker 1: Any kind of drugs he can get his hand on,
25:23
Speaker 1: pretty much. Because this time when they're banging, he does
25:26
Speaker 1: a bunch of drugs and he just starts like pouring
25:28
Speaker 1: ink all over her butt. And then he puts a
25:32
Speaker 1: notebook in between her butt cheeks. I don't even remember
25:35
Speaker 1: watching this stuff. I feel like fucking shit was just
25:39
Speaker 1: not not clicking. Like, what am I watching? What is
25:42
Speaker 1: this a symbol of? Because I feel like all of
25:44
Speaker 1: this is probably supposed to be like symbolic. And he's like,
25:47
Speaker 1: you know, your butt's the ink and the notebook is
25:50
Speaker 1: the paper. Your your your butt cheeks tell a story.
25:54
Speaker 1: What is this like a fucking Taylor Swift song or something?
25:57
Speaker 1: But on, you know, ayahuasca. It's like if you listen
26:01
Speaker 1: to Taylor Swift while you're on an ayahuasca trip, it's
26:03
Speaker 1: just like your butt's the page, my cheeks are the ink.
26:07
Speaker 1: Maybe if she like farted really hard on it, it
26:09
Speaker 1: would be like one of those litmus tests or whatever
26:12
Speaker 1: where you're supposed to see pictures. Like, what do you
26:15
Speaker 1: see now? Oh, I see a fucking shit stain. Anyway, fuck.
26:19
Speaker 1: What happens if she has to take a shit and
26:21
Speaker 1: she's got all that ink on her butt cheeks, brother?
26:23
Speaker 1: Do you think about that? You're going to mess up
26:25
Speaker 1: her whole fucking vibe in her house. You know, her
26:27
Speaker 1: cool house that she has with the fucking dead chickens
26:31
Speaker 1: and the fucking cat food everywhere. Oh, I don't think
26:33
Speaker 1: I've even gotten to the refrigerator part yet, but there's
26:36
Speaker 1: like some weird stuff going on with the refrigerator too later, so...
26:40
Speaker 1: You know, a lot of cool stuff. There's a lot
26:42
Speaker 1: of phallic symbols, I feel like, that we get throughout
26:45
Speaker 1: this scene as well. There's a shot we cut right
26:49
Speaker 1: after that to a shot of her just doing her
26:51
Speaker 1: meat job again. So we go straight from inky butt cheeks,
26:55
Speaker 1: notebook butthole or whatever, to her just like grinding up
26:59
Speaker 1: raw meat into a big fucking grinder and fucking guts
27:03
Speaker 1: going out everywhere. She's just standing next to a pile
27:05
Speaker 1: of guts. Teacher guy, Michael, he just starts doing a
27:08
Speaker 1: bunch more drugs. He's just like, hell yeah. I need to,
27:12
Speaker 1: you know what? I need to get on the same
27:14
Speaker 1: level of this damn shaman. I need to see what
27:16
Speaker 1: kind of doses he was doing. And if I do them,
27:19
Speaker 1: then maybe I'll understand what the shaman was trying to understand.
27:23
Speaker 1: And it's like, what the fuck are you talking about?
27:26
Speaker 1: Is that, that's what he's thinking. That's what this fucking
27:28
Speaker 1: dumb ass guy, this fucking guy, he's thinking like, yeah,
27:32
Speaker 1: if I do a bunch of drugs, I'll be a shaman.
27:35
Speaker 1: You know, maybe I'll just fake it till I make it, dude.
27:38
Speaker 1: It's like, why would you even want to be a shaman, dumbass?
27:41
Speaker 1: You're a fucking college teacher and shit. Shut up. Shut
27:45
Speaker 1: up and do your fucking job, you little dumbass. Shut
27:48
Speaker 1: up and teach the kids how to be anthropologists, you
27:51
Speaker 1: stupid fucking dumbass. Shut up and teach the kids, dumbass.
27:56
Speaker 1: You don't need to do drugs. You don't need to
27:58
Speaker 1: pretend that you're a shaman. You're not. You're just some
28:01
Speaker 1: little idiot who's running around. banging this crazy lady. Throughout
28:07
Speaker 1: this whole thing, we'll learn more and more about the
28:09
Speaker 1: shaman as well. Like this is a very important part
28:12
Speaker 1: of the story. It's almost like one of the main focuses,
28:15
Speaker 1: I feel like. But the shaman's head is like bashed
28:19
Speaker 1: in on the back. So he's like, hmm, someone murdered
28:21
Speaker 1: the shaman. And then we found him in like a
28:24
Speaker 1: like an old swamp or something like that. And for
28:27
Speaker 1: some reason, he's just like really interested in this fucking guy.
28:31
Speaker 1: But after he does more drugs, he, so the guy
28:34
Speaker 1: that she was dancing with at the party that I
28:36
Speaker 1: was like, this guy is connected to the mob. He
28:39
Speaker 1: tries to sell her to that guy for some reason. Like,
28:43
Speaker 1: I don't know if he's just like, If you give
28:45
Speaker 1: me some more drugs, I'll let you bang this lady
28:49
Speaker 1: because this guy is like connections, you know? And she's
28:51
Speaker 1: just like, no, I'm not going to bang this fucking guy.
28:54
Speaker 1: Are you joking me? She's like, listen up, Michael. Between
28:58
Speaker 1: being in engineering school and working at the chicken guts factory,
29:03
Speaker 1: I'm too busy to also be a drug prostitute. Don't
29:07
Speaker 1: you understand that? And that, you know, this movie is
29:10
Speaker 1: actually starting to have more in common with Freddy Got
29:14
Speaker 1: Finger than I realized, because in that, he can't work
29:16
Speaker 1: at the cheese sandwich factory because he wants to chase
29:19
Speaker 1: his dream of being an illustrator. And in this, she
29:23
Speaker 1: doesn't want to work at the guts factory because she
29:25
Speaker 1: wants to chase her dream of being an engineer. But
29:30
Speaker 1: I also don't think she really wants to be an engineer.
29:33
Speaker 1: I think she's just kind of doing it. It feels
29:35
Speaker 1: like her character is supposed to be really unsure about
29:39
Speaker 1: what she wants to do in school. And like she's
29:41
Speaker 1: just kind of doing this because she thinks it'll give
29:44
Speaker 1: her a lot of credibility. Like if she can just
29:46
Speaker 1: go around being like, I'm an engineering student. I feel
29:49
Speaker 1: like she does that a lot to kind of just
29:51
Speaker 1: like shut people down when they're like, Who's this fucking
29:53
Speaker 1: youngster right here who doesn't know what the fuck they
29:56
Speaker 1: want to do with their life? And she's just like, actually,
29:58
Speaker 1: I'm an engineer student, dumbass. Actually, I have a fucking
30:01
Speaker 1: chicken head baby doll in my house, so why don't
30:04
Speaker 1: you fucking scoot along there, you stupid fuck? And they're
30:07
Speaker 1: just like, oh, shit, sorry. Actually, I'm dating a 50-year-old
30:10
Speaker 1: that does mushrooms, so get the fuck out of my face.
30:13
Speaker 1: Why don't you look at your life, you know, before
30:16
Speaker 1: you judge me? My cool life with my stupid apartment
30:20
Speaker 1: where I just eat cat food out of the fucking bowl.
30:23
Speaker 1: God damn it. So anyway, she's like, no, not getting
30:26
Speaker 1: banged for drugs or whatever. We see her at engineering
30:30
Speaker 1: school a little bit. Um, There's a few shots of
30:33
Speaker 1: her here. Like they're actually in like this big refinery
30:37
Speaker 1: or something where there's a lot of machinery working. They
30:39
Speaker 1: always have to wear hard hats and ear protection and
30:42
Speaker 1: shit like that. You know, eye protection, PPE. But this
30:45
Speaker 1: time when we see her there, one of the students
30:48
Speaker 1: gets his fucking arm ripped off. And there's just like,
30:51
Speaker 1: you know, an alarm going off. Everyone's running. They're like,
30:53
Speaker 1: holy shit, something happened over there. They all like kind
30:56
Speaker 1: of run over to see it. And she just stares
30:59
Speaker 1: at it like unfazed. She doesn't... Everyone else is, like,
31:02
Speaker 1: freaking out. They're like, get the fucking ambulance, you know?
31:05
Speaker 1: And this guy's arm is, like, ripped off from the shoulder.
31:08
Speaker 1: This is another really good-looking effect. And he's just on
31:11
Speaker 1: the ground, like, seizing out and shit. I don't know
31:13
Speaker 1: if her kind of little... little emotion or lack of
31:18
Speaker 1: reaction that she has in this movie. I don't know
31:21
Speaker 1: what this is all trying to, like, signal to, and
31:24
Speaker 1: just the weird, like, sex and stuff like that. I
31:26
Speaker 1: don't know what it's supposed to mean. I don't know what, like,
31:28
Speaker 1: type of mental state she's supposed to be in. I
31:31
Speaker 1: don't know if it's just supposed to be, like, trauma
31:33
Speaker 1: from her childhood, because it sounds like she had a
31:35
Speaker 1: fucked up childhood, or if there's, like, that plus. What
31:38
Speaker 1: is she, like, got BPD or something? Or is she, uh, what,
31:41
Speaker 1: a fucking sociopath or something like that? Or I don't know.
31:45
Speaker 1: They don't really ever... you know, like I said, shit
31:48
Speaker 1: just kind of happens. I don't, I don't know what
31:50
Speaker 1: the thought is behind that. This funny enough. I mean, well,
31:54
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is funny or what, but
31:56
Speaker 1: like this movie was written by a woman named Manuela Gritkowska,
32:02
Speaker 1: or it's at least adapted from her screenplay. And this
32:06
Speaker 1: lady is like a, apparently like an extreme, I don't
32:09
Speaker 1: know if I'd say extreme, but she's like a very
32:11
Speaker 1: prominent feminist figure, uh, in the, the founder of the
32:15
Speaker 1: Feminist Initiative Party. Maybe I need to read the book
32:19
Speaker 1: that came with the movie, but I feel like there's
32:21
Speaker 1: gotta be more behind all of these things that are happening.
32:25
Speaker 1: There's gotta be a deeper message. I would say one
32:28
Speaker 1: of the more obvious feminist messages here is that this
32:31
Speaker 1: lady is pretty much just treated like a nobody. She's
32:35
Speaker 1: just kind of treated like The only thing she's there
32:37
Speaker 1: for is to have sex with or to be like
32:39
Speaker 1: ogled at. That's mostly how every man in the movie
32:44
Speaker 1: kind of interacts with her, especially when they first run
32:47
Speaker 1: into her. They're just kind of like, damn, look at
32:48
Speaker 1: those honkers. Oh, hubba hubba. Let me see them juggies.
32:54
Speaker 1: I'm cutting that out. I gotta cut that. Hubba hubba!
32:57
Speaker 1: Let me hump your butt! Let me put a notebook
32:59
Speaker 1: in your butt! This is like the notebook before the notebook, but,
33:04
Speaker 1: you know, they kind of missed the mark on this one,
33:06
Speaker 1: because he's like, do you want me to jam this
33:08
Speaker 1: in your ass, crack? Or should we be like, be
33:11
Speaker 1: seniors and have dimension and love each other? I don't know.
33:15
Speaker 1: They went this way, the other notebook went that way,
33:17
Speaker 1: and we found out which one made lots of money,
33:20
Speaker 1: and I don't think this movie made that much money.
33:24
Speaker 1: This movie was kind of shunned when it came out,
33:27
Speaker 1: I think, in Poland. I think they were kind of like,
33:30
Speaker 1: you good, bud? How you doing there, Zulowski? You've been
33:34
Speaker 1: kicked out of Poland like twice now, motherfucker, for making
33:37
Speaker 1: movies like this. You're just going to keep it going.
33:41
Speaker 1: But you know, respect to him. The guy's a lot
33:43
Speaker 1: braver than I am. I feel like if I got
33:45
Speaker 1: kicked out of the fucking country twice for making movies
33:49
Speaker 1: like this, I'd be like, Maybe we'll just do like,
33:52
Speaker 1: what do we got here? What can we make here?
33:54
Speaker 1: How about Spider-Man? Can we do like maybe a Spider-Man
33:59
Speaker 1: movie or something? Or maybe a Batman movie? Or maybe
34:04
Speaker 1: we could do like the Polish version of Ferris Bueller's
34:07
Speaker 1: Day Off or something like that, you know? Maybe play
34:10
Speaker 1: it safe here instead of making a weird sex shaman
34:14
Speaker 1: movie with some really confusing imagery and hidden meanings, I guess, probably. Anyway,
34:21
Speaker 1: back to it. Let's get back to it. Where was I? Yeah,
34:24
Speaker 1: the guy gets his arm ripped off. So we go
34:27
Speaker 1: straight from this guy getting his arm ripped off to
34:30
Speaker 1: the teacher explaining that he discovered that the shaman has
34:35
Speaker 1: semen in the mummy's butt. So the teacher says, I
34:40
Speaker 1: just found semen in the mummy's butt. And so now
34:43
Speaker 1: he's obsessed with butts. So maybe that's what the whole
34:46
Speaker 1: point of the notebook shit was. Maybe he's like semen
34:49
Speaker 1: plus butts equals shaman. So I think we know where
34:53
Speaker 1: he's going from here. He's like shaman does the drugs.
34:56
Speaker 1: I got to do the drugs. Shaman got semen in
34:58
Speaker 1: his butt. I got to get semen in my butt.
35:01
Speaker 1: So old teach is about to have himself a brand
35:04
Speaker 1: new experience here. Unless he's, you know, been doing butt
35:07
Speaker 1: stuff already. They don't they don't ever mention that. And
35:11
Speaker 1: for some reason, you know, of course, you go from
35:14
Speaker 1: a scene where he's like, my God, there's semen in
35:17
Speaker 1: the mummy's butt to him just like teaching her how
35:19
Speaker 1: to eat properly. He's like, you put your forks here
35:23
Speaker 1: and your spoons here and you, you know, fucking don't
35:26
Speaker 1: put your elbows on the table and shit and use
35:28
Speaker 1: your put your fucking fold your napkin up like this.
35:32
Speaker 1: And anyway, have you ever wanted to shove semen in
35:35
Speaker 1: my butt? so I can be a shaman or whatever.
35:38
Speaker 1: Maybe you could do that with your forks. After this,
35:41
Speaker 1: after he teaches her how to eat proper, he bays
35:44
Speaker 1: the mummy in some like goulay jammers or something. He
35:47
Speaker 1: gets the green juice out and puts the mummy in
35:51
Speaker 1: the juice. It's green juice or whatever, and they're doing
35:54
Speaker 1: all the mummy's drugs. They're like, it's time. We're gonna
35:57
Speaker 1: fucking resurrect this mummy. The guy, the The mob guy
36:01
Speaker 1: shows up on rollerblades and just starts like roller skating
36:04
Speaker 1: around the fucking office or whatever, this museum looking place.
36:08
Speaker 1: And this is when we get the mafia stuff. So
36:11
Speaker 1: they're basically this guy. He shows up and he's just
36:15
Speaker 1: like got a box and he's like, hey, the mobs
36:18
Speaker 1: after me stole some uranium or something from them. Like
36:22
Speaker 1: this is back to the future or something. He's like,
36:24
Speaker 1: he's basically like, I got a little nuke in here
36:28
Speaker 1: and now they're going to kill me. And it's like, yeah, probably.
36:31
Speaker 1: Why did you do that? Why didn't you just do
36:33
Speaker 1: what you're supposed to do? Usually if you don't do
36:36
Speaker 1: what the mob has you doing, if you steal their shit,
36:39
Speaker 1: they're probably going to fucking kill you, you dumb idiot.
36:42
Speaker 1: But he steals like a little bomb or something. While
36:47
Speaker 1: the teacher's getting all jacked off to the mummy and
36:50
Speaker 1: this green ooze or whatever, the Italian, she goes over
36:55
Speaker 1: to the stalker student's house, her her peer in class,
37:01
Speaker 1: she goes over there and just sucks him off for
37:04
Speaker 1: some reason. And he's like, oh, she busts in there
37:08
Speaker 1: and just throws his roommates out and is like, I'm
37:11
Speaker 1: going to suck off your friend. Get out of here.
37:13
Speaker 1: And they're just kind of like, what? And he's just
37:15
Speaker 1: telling her, I'm a virgin. I love you. I want
37:19
Speaker 1: to get married to you. I don't want to just
37:21
Speaker 1: be fucking you and stuff like that. And she's like,
37:23
Speaker 1: I don't care. And she just sucks his dick. And
37:25
Speaker 1: it's like, And so at some point after that, she
37:29
Speaker 1: leaves after she sucks him. And he sees that she
37:33
Speaker 1: went right back to the teacher. Like he was thinking like,
37:36
Speaker 1: hell yeah, she sucked my dick. We're going to get married.
37:38
Speaker 1: And once he realizes that's not how this is going
37:41
Speaker 1: to play out for him, he crashes his scooter into
37:44
Speaker 1: a truck and kills himself. And so he's dead. But
37:47
Speaker 1: back over with the teacher when he's got the fucking
37:50
Speaker 1: mummy in the green Hawaiian punch. The mummy just starts
37:54
Speaker 1: talking to him and he's just like, yeah, I was
37:56
Speaker 1: fucking married to a shaman and I loved her and
38:00
Speaker 1: stuff like that. And I think the mummy tells him that, yeah,
38:04
Speaker 1: she wanted to steal my magic powers. So she got
38:08
Speaker 1: me raped by somebody and that's why there's semen in
38:11
Speaker 1: my butt. And then she... Killed me by crushing my
38:14
Speaker 1: head or something like that. And he's just kind of like, damn,
38:17
Speaker 1: thanks for telling me that. Thanks for telling me that, mummy.
38:22
Speaker 1: I'm fully enlightened now, is the way the teacher's feeling.
38:26
Speaker 1: So they meet back up. Teach and the Italian, they
38:29
Speaker 1: meet back up. And she, like, fucks him in the ass,
38:32
Speaker 1: I guess. Because he's like, you know what you gotta do?
38:35
Speaker 1: If you want me to be a fucking full, fully
38:37
Speaker 1: powered super shaman, you gotta fuck me in the ass.
38:41
Speaker 1: And so she does. We see that the teacher's fiance
38:46
Speaker 1: has killed herself at this point because he's just fully
38:49
Speaker 1: told her like, yeah, I'm fucking this crazy bitch. She's
38:52
Speaker 1: got like dead animals at her house and she eats
38:54
Speaker 1: cat food off the ground. So she's like, I'm going
38:56
Speaker 1: to fucking kill myself now. And she does. But we
38:58
Speaker 1: get more mafia stuff. The... The guy is just getting
39:02
Speaker 1: chased around by the mob and he's like all fucking
39:04
Speaker 1: beat up and bloody and stuff like that. And for
39:07
Speaker 1: some reason, after all this fucking shit happens, the teacher
39:11
Speaker 1: is just like cleaning train windows. He's like sponging down
39:15
Speaker 1: train windows with soap. I think for free. I don't
39:17
Speaker 1: even think this is like his like he's like, I'm
39:20
Speaker 1: going to get a new job now. But I think
39:22
Speaker 1: it's part of him being like enlightened. You know, he's like,
39:24
Speaker 1: I don't need all this fancy shit. I don't need
39:26
Speaker 1: to be a teacher. I need to fucking wash windows. windows.
39:31
Speaker 1: And it's like, okay. Okay, you're fucking crazy. Okay, this
39:35
Speaker 1: motherfucker is going stupid. Okay. He got his ass fucked,
39:42
Speaker 1: and now he's a window washer. Like, Freddy got fingers dead. Oh, yeah,
39:46
Speaker 1: he's 50 years old and he can get fucked in
39:49
Speaker 1: his ass. We can wash, oh, we can wash train
39:52
Speaker 1: windows and get fucked in his ass. He's 30 years
39:55
Speaker 1: old and he can eat a chicken sandwich. You can
39:58
Speaker 1: either eat that goddamn roast beef or you can go
40:01
Speaker 1: to bed. Yeah, that's fucking riptorn. That's what this movie needs.
40:06
Speaker 1: This movie needs a rip torn to really break up
40:09
Speaker 1: some of this goofy shit. He just pops in there. Yeah,
40:12
Speaker 1: he can do drugs with a dead mummy and get
40:15
Speaker 1: fucked in his ass. Or he can put a notebook
40:17
Speaker 1: in a girl's butt cheeks. Are you two fucking stop
40:20
Speaker 1: making so fucking much noise. I gotta go to work
40:23
Speaker 1: in the morning. It's three in the morning. Fucking Harlan
40:28
Speaker 1: Wayans in that movie, dude. Breaking his leg after that.
40:32
Speaker 1: Get him a job. Anyway, double feature idea. Watch Freddy
40:36
Speaker 1: Got Finger and Shamanca back to back. It'll be a
40:39
Speaker 1: life changer. So once the teacher's done cleaning all these windows,
40:43
Speaker 1: he realizes I have been enlightened. I'm living a new
40:47
Speaker 1: life now. I don't need a girlfriend that eats cat
40:52
Speaker 1: food off the ground. I don't think I ever mentioned this,
40:56
Speaker 1: but there's like a scene where she like Opens up
40:58
Speaker 1: her fridge and I think there's just like a bunch
41:01
Speaker 1: of meat in there or something. And she starts like
41:03
Speaker 1: jacking off to it and there's like a green light
41:05
Speaker 1: coming out of her fridge. And she has the refrigerator
41:08
Speaker 1: like moved into the middle of her living room. Like
41:11
Speaker 1: there's like no furniture. It's just a refrigerator in there. Anyway,
41:16
Speaker 1: not important, but it is. It does happen. And I
41:19
Speaker 1: forgot to write that down, I guess. So he's just like, hey,
41:21
Speaker 1: guess what? I'm breaking up with your ass. I'm going
41:24
Speaker 1: to be a priest now and live like a fucking
41:26
Speaker 1: cool life where I'm just like, you know, helping people
41:29
Speaker 1: and not doing all this dumb shit that I've been
41:31
Speaker 1: doing for the last couple of days or however long
41:34
Speaker 1: this movie has been going on for. And so she's
41:37
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, great, great idea. And she smashes the
41:41
Speaker 1: back of his head in. With a can of food,
41:44
Speaker 1: like she gets some canned food out and crushes the
41:46
Speaker 1: back of his head with it. Uh, and then, and we,
41:50
Speaker 1: you know, he like falls down on a bed and
41:53
Speaker 1: he's hanging over the bed. His eyes are still open
41:55
Speaker 1: and he's like twitching. So it's like, I guess he's
41:57
Speaker 1: not totally dead yet. And we kind of see this
42:00
Speaker 1: big wound on the back of his head and it
42:02
Speaker 1: looks just like the shaman's wound on the back of
42:04
Speaker 1: his head. She gets a spoon out and just starts
42:07
Speaker 1: eating all of the gore and brains out of the
42:10
Speaker 1: back of his head. So she's doing this the whole
42:13
Speaker 1: time this is going on. His eyes are just like
42:15
Speaker 1: open and his hand is twitching a bunch. And she's
42:19
Speaker 1: getting fucking covered in blood and brains. The roller blade guy,
42:23
Speaker 1: the mob guy, we see him getting chased again. He
42:26
Speaker 1: flips it on him and he pulls out that like
42:28
Speaker 1: bomb that he got out. It's like a mini. Excuse me.
42:33
Speaker 1: Had a big sneeze. He pulls out like a mini
42:36
Speaker 1: atomic bomb, I guess, or something. And he's just like, oh,
42:39
Speaker 1: he's like, I'm going to use it. And he just
42:41
Speaker 1: he fucking does. He just like opens it up and
42:44
Speaker 1: it explodes. I guess the whole screen, everything just gets
42:47
Speaker 1: washed out in white. And this was really cool. We
42:49
Speaker 1: see like a bunch of different scenes going on and
42:52
Speaker 1: they're all just like completely washed out with like super
42:55
Speaker 1: bright light. Like you can kind of see like the
42:56
Speaker 1: silhouette of things around it. And we see we see
43:00
Speaker 1: the Italian just covered in blood. She's washing, like, in
43:04
Speaker 1: the shower, just, like, washing herself down with all the blood.
43:07
Speaker 1: We hear some sirens in the background. The teacher's dead
43:11
Speaker 1: body is just kind of chilling on the bed. She
43:13
Speaker 1: gets dressed, like, kind of. I can't remember. Yeah, she's, like,
43:17
Speaker 1: you know, wearing some clothes at this point, at least,
43:20
Speaker 1: and goes outside. And we see her just kind of
43:22
Speaker 1: walk past the graffiti area that was in the opening
43:26
Speaker 1: part of the movie. And it's kind of a nice
43:29
Speaker 1: little cap on the movie. It's, like... Almost mirrored scenes,
43:32
Speaker 1: but she's heading in the opposite direction. You just get
43:36
Speaker 1: these long shots of her going all the way across
43:39
Speaker 1: the screen at the beginning of the movie, and at
43:41
Speaker 1: the end she's going the other way. It's kind of neat.
43:45
Speaker 1: Neat little visual they got going on there. So anyway,
43:49
Speaker 1: that's Shamanca. If you want to watch this movie, you're
43:52
Speaker 1: probably going to have to buy it on DVD or
43:54
Speaker 1: maybe illegally stream it or something. I didn't check to
43:57
Speaker 1: see if it's on YouTube. I know some of his
43:59
Speaker 1: earlier movies were on YouTube. I would give this movie
44:04
Speaker 1: a 4 out of 5. I did enjoy it a lot,
44:06
Speaker 1: even though I feel like I was just kind of
44:08
Speaker 1: confused and whatnot. It was definitely one of those movies
44:12
Speaker 1: that I had to kind of sit with after a
44:13
Speaker 1: while and think about it. At first, I was honestly
44:16
Speaker 1: pretty put off by it, just like my initial watch.
44:19
Speaker 1: I was kind of thinking, like, is this just a
44:21
Speaker 1: bunch of fucking random shit or what? But the more
44:25
Speaker 1: I thought about it, the more I was like, oh, okay,
44:27
Speaker 1: I guess I kind of get... some of the symbolism
44:29
Speaker 1: that's going on there. There's probably way more that I, uh,
44:32
Speaker 1: that went over my head, but it's, uh, you know,
44:35
Speaker 1: it's one of those movies that's very interesting that I
44:37
Speaker 1: feel like on further watches, you would probably pick up
44:40
Speaker 1: on some more things and maybe it would be worth
44:43
Speaker 1: reading about a little bit too, or something. All right.
44:46
Speaker 1: If you enjoyed the episode, be sure to, uh, Like, subscribe,
44:50
Speaker 1: follow on all the social medias, sign up on Patreon
44:53
Speaker 1: for some bonus episodes. I'm going to have some spooky
44:57
Speaker 1: book club episodes coming out on the regular series for Halloween.
45:03
Speaker 1: Me and Colton are going to have some special Halloween episodes,
45:07
Speaker 1: so be sure to check those out. Good night.