Latest / Women at Work: Career, Leadership & Modern Work / Why Women Are Overmentored and Undersponsored
Transcript
- Lucas: Luna, I want to talk about something that sounds like good news but actually isn't: women are more likely to have mentors than men, yet they're still far less likely to make it to the C-suite. Luna: Right — because mentorship alone doesn't get you promoted. You need someone who's actually in the room when the decisions are made. Lucas: Exactly. And there's a name for that kind of advocacy: sponsorship. The 2025 Women in the Workplace report from LeanIn.Org and McKinsey found that women are 24 percent more likely than men to report having a mentor — but 30 percent less likely to have a sponsor. Luna: Thirty percent — that's a massive gap. And it's probably one of the biggest reasons we still see so few women in CEO roles. Lucas: It is. Because a mentor gives you advice. A sponsor gives you a seat at the table — or rather, they pull you up to the table. They use their political capital to recommend you for the stretch assignment, the promotion, the visibility project. Luna: And I think many women don't realize the difference until it's too late. They spend years collecting mentors who tell them 'you should work on your executive presence' or 'you need to take more risks' — but no one is actually nominating them for the role. Lucas: That's a really good point. There's a term for that — being 'overmentored and undersponsored.' It's like you get all the coaching but none of the leverage. And the data backs it up: the same report shows that women who have a sponsor are 18 percent more likely to ask for a promotion and 22 percent more likely to get one. Luna: Wow — so sponsorship is actually a better predictor of advancement than performance ratings, in some cases. Lucas: It can be. Because performance is table stakes. Sponsorship is what gets you considered for roles where you're not the obvious candidate. And this is especially critical for women of color, who face an even bigger sponsorship gap. Luna: Let's talk about why the gap exists in the first place. Is it that women don't ask for sponsors, or that men are more likely to sponsor other men? Lucas: A bit of both. Research shows that sponsors tend to choose protégés who remind them of their younger selves — it's a kind of affinity bias. So if the senior leadership is predominantly white men, they naturally gravitate toward younger men who share their background and style. Luna: But women also sometimes hesitate to ask for sponsorship because they're afraid of seeming entitled or because they don't realize it's something you can request. Lucas: That's a big one. Many women are socialized to believe that hard work alone will be recognized. And when it isn't, they assume they just need to work harder. Meanwhile, men are more likely to ask for — and expect — active advocacy. Luna: So what's the fix? How do you convert a mentor into a sponsor? Lucas: It starts with being explicit about what you need. Instead of asking 'Can you give me feedback on my presentation?' you say 'I'm interested in the VP role when it opens. Would you be willing to advocate for me in the succession planning meeting?' Luna: That's a very different ask. It's direct and it's specific. And it gives the person a clear way to help. Lucas: Right. And if they say yes, you've essentially turned them into a sponsor. If they say no or hesitate, you know where you stand — and you can find someone else. Luna: There's also the question of visibility. You can't be sponsored if the senior leaders don't know who you are. So women need to be strategic about getting in front of the right people. Lucas: Absolutely. And that's where the earlier episodes on the visibility paradox and the ambition penalty come in — there's a fine line between being visible and being seen as self-promoting. But sponsors can help navigate that, too. Luna: I want to bring in a concrete example. There's a story from a few years ago about a woman at a large tech company who was consistently rated as a top performer but never got the VP promotion. She had three mentors — all senior men who gave her great advice. But none of them ever mentioned her name in the promotion committee. Lucas: Classic overmentored and undersponsored. So what did she do? Luna: She finally asked one of them directly: 'Are you willing to speak up for me when my name comes up?' He said he'd try — but he didn't. That's when she realized she needed a different approach. Lucas: And she found a sponsor — maybe not one of her mentors, but someone else who had influence and believed in her. Luna: Exactly. She started volunteering for cross-functional projects led by a senior vice president. She delivered results, and then she asked him: 'Do you see a path for me to VP? If so, I'd appreciate your support.' He became her sponsor, and she got the promotion the next cycle. Lucas: That's the formula: deliver results, build visibility with the right person, and make the explicit ask. But it's also about organizational structure. Some companies have formal sponsorship programs — like pairing high-potential women with executives who are measured on their advancement. Luna: And that makes a difference. When sponsorship is built into the performance review or the succession planning process, it takes the burden off the individual to ask. Lucas: But until every company does that, women need to be proactive. And I think one of the best pieces of advice comes from a book called 'For Her Own Good' — no, actually it's from a Harvard Business Review article: 'Ask for air cover, not advice.' Luna: I love that. 'Air cover' — it's a military term for protection from above. You want someone who will shield you from organizational flak and clear a path forward. Lucas: Exactly. And that's what sponsorship really is. It's not about having coffee chats — it's about someone putting their reputation on the line for you. Luna: And this is exactly the kind of conversation we love to have on this show. If we've helped you think through a career move or decision, we want you to know that we keep this podcast ad-free by choice. We think the content should speak for itself. Lucas: Yeah, no ads, no sponsors pushing a message. The way we keep it going is through listener support. If you find value in what we do, the link to contribute is buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. Luna: And it genuinely makes a difference — every contribution helps us keep the episodes coming and the conversations honest. Lucas: So back to sponsorship. I think one of the reasons the gap persists is that many senior leaders don't realize they're not sponsoring women. They think they're being equally supportive, but when you look at the data, they're spending more time mentoring women than men — and more time sponsoring men. Luna: So there's an awareness problem. Leaders need to ask themselves: 'Who am I actively advocating for? And is there a pattern?' Lucas: Right. And women can help by making the ask concrete. Not 'Could you be my mentor?' but 'I'm targeting this role. Can you champion me?' Luna: That shift in language changes the relationship. It's no longer about advice — it's about action. Lucas: And if the person says no or is vague, that's information too. You know they're not a sponsor, and you can invest your energy elsewhere. Luna: So the big takeaway for today: mentorship is valuable, but sponsorship is what moves the needle on promotions. Women need both — but they should prioritize finding sponsors. Lucas: And organizations need to build sponsorship into their systems, not just mentorship programs. Because the data is clear: when women have sponsors, they advance. When they only have mentors, they stay in place. Luna: I think that's a great note to end on. Lucas, thank you for this. Lucas: Always a pleasure, Luna. Thanks for the great conversation.