Latest / Time with God with John North / Things to Look for In a Dating Relationship Pt. 2
Transcript
- 0:05Speaker 1: Good Tuesday morning. We're talking all this week about things
- 0:10Speaker 1: you should look for in a marriage partner or when
- 0:14Speaker 1: you're in a dating relationship with someone. Usually we talk
- 0:19Speaker 1: about general truths that are true for all our listeners,
- 0:21Speaker 1: but many of our listeners are young adults, and I
- 0:25Speaker 1: want to speak directly to you, as I have many
- 0:28Speaker 1: times to my own kids who are now young adults.
- 0:32Speaker 1: About these five Cs that you should be looking for
- 0:36Speaker 1: in someone that you date or are moving towards marriage with.
- 0:40Speaker 1: The first C is that they are a Christian.
- 0:44Speaker 1: You're going into a life partnership with someone and you
- 0:47Speaker 1: want to be able to share the most important thing
- 0:50Speaker 1: in your life with them. You want to build your
- 0:53Speaker 1: marriage on this foundation of your relationship with God. You want,
- 0:59Speaker 1: when you face the
- 0:59Speaker 1: struggles and challenges of marriage, you want God to be
- 1:03Speaker 1: able to work with you through those marriage conflicts, through
- 1:08Speaker 1: those crises that you face as you go through life.
- 1:12Speaker 1: So the first, most important thing you're looking for is
- 1:16Speaker 1: that this person is a Christian. Secondly,
- 1:20Speaker 1: The second most important thing you're looking for is that
- 1:23Speaker 1: they aren't just a Christian, but they are a committed Christian. Christian, 1, committed, #2.
- 1:33Speaker 1: So the Bible talks about what a relationship between a
- 1:37Speaker 1: husband and wife should be like. Here's what it says
- 1:41Speaker 1: in Ephesians chapter 5 in the Bible. Starting in verse 25.
- 1:46Speaker 1: It says, Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the
- 1:52Speaker 1: church and gave Himself up for her, that He might
- 1:56Speaker 1: sanctify her.
- 1:57Speaker 1: Having cleansed her by the washing of water with the
- 2:00Speaker 1: word so that he might present the church to himself
- 2:04Speaker 1: in splendour without spot or wrinkle or any such thing,
- 2:08Speaker 1: that she might be holy and without blemish in the
- 2:12Speaker 1: same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.
- 2:17Speaker 1: He who loves his wife loves himself.
- 2:21Speaker 1: For no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes
- 2:24Speaker 1: and cherishes it just as Christ does the church because
- 2:28Speaker 1: we are members of his body.
- 2:30Speaker 1: Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and
- 2:34Speaker 1: hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become
- 2:38Speaker 1: one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying
- 2:43Speaker 1: that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let
- 2:47Speaker 1: each one of you love his wife as himself, and
- 2:51Speaker 1: let the wife see that she respects her husband.
- 2:57Speaker 1: So here is God's plan for a relationship in marriage.
- 3:03Speaker 1: Husbands love your wives. Wives respect your husband.
- 3:09Speaker 1: And as we see this working out in marriage, it's
- 3:13Speaker 1: like what we often share with people when we're counselling
- 3:17Speaker 1: them in preparation for marriage, that
- 3:21Speaker 1: There's 3 people involved in your marriage. There's the husband,
- 3:24Speaker 1: the wife, and God.
- 3:26Speaker 1: And they're like points on a triangle.
- 3:30Speaker 1: And when the two of you move down that line
- 3:35Speaker 1: towards God, you're also moving closer to each other.
- 3:41Speaker 1: And on the other hand, when you move further away
- 3:44Speaker 1: from God, you're also causing problems in your relationship with
- 3:49Speaker 1: one another, you know, the Christian life as a whole
- 3:53Speaker 1: and including marriage, it only works the way God designed
- 3:59Speaker 1: when God is at the centre of it, not when
- 4:02Speaker 1: He's just sort of in your life off to the
- 4:04Speaker 1: edge somewhere, but you're really still living for yourself.
- 4:08Speaker 1: Not yourself at the centre, not even your spouse at
- 4:11Speaker 1: the centre, but God at the centre. That's when the
- 4:15Speaker 1: Christian life works. And this commitment to God, to putting
- 4:20Speaker 1: God first in your life, it's going to give you
- 4:24Speaker 1: the foundation you want to build on in your relationship
- 4:28Speaker 1: with the other person. It's also going to keep you
- 4:31Speaker 1: committed to your marriage.
- 4:35Speaker 1: I want to tell you, having been married for over
- 4:37Speaker 1: 30 years, that there are times in your marriage where
- 4:42Speaker 1: you're just struggling in your marriage. It's hard. It's not easy.
- 4:47Speaker 1: Maybe as you listen, you're in a marriage that's like that,
- 4:49Speaker 1: and you say, I'm, I'm struggling to hold my commitment
- 4:53Speaker 1: to this marriage.
- 4:54Speaker 1: Well, what will hold you through those times long enough
- 4:58Speaker 1: for you to start working through those issues that need
- 5:01Speaker 1: to be worked through is your commitment to God, your
- 5:04Speaker 1: commitment to scripture.
- 5:06Speaker 1: You want to be married to someone who's going to
- 5:09Speaker 1: help you raise your kids to put God first, and
- 5:13Speaker 1: that's only someone who is committed to God at the
- 5:17Speaker 1: centre of your own.
- 5:20Speaker 1: And that's only someone who's committed to God at the
- 5:23Speaker 1: centre of their own life. The most important thing you're
- 5:26Speaker 1: looking for in someone you're dating or moving towards marriage
- 5:30Speaker 1: with is that they are a Christian. The second most
- 5:33Speaker 1: important thing is that they are committed to God.
- 5:39Speaker 1: I'm John North.