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Design the Life You Want · Death Before Decay

• speaker-1: welcome to the Death Before Decay podcast, the podcast by a dentist, but not always about dentistry. I'm Doctor Elliott Hummiston and this is my co host John Erline. Hello. How you doing, John? Elliot Humiston: welcome to the Death Before Decay podcast, the podcast by a dentist, but not always about dentistry. I'm Dr. Elliot Humestin, and this is my co-host John Erline. Hello. How are you doing, John? Doing great. Thanks for having me again. Thanks for letting me show up. speaker-2: Doing great. Thanks for having me again. Thanks for letting me show up. speaker-1: Yeah, you bet, buddy. You bet. and today we're here with my friend Corey. there are a handful of people in my life that I Elliot Humiston: Yeah, you bet, buddy. You bet. and today we're here with my friend Corey. there are a handful of people in my life that I speaker-1: call when I need a decision challenged and questioned. And Corey's one of those people. she spent her years helping build healthier teams, stronger cultures, and better businesses. But what I've always appreciated about you most is that you see Elliot Humiston: call when I need a decision challenged and questioned and Corey's one of those people. she's spent her years helping build healthier teams, stronger cultures and better businesses. But what I've always appreciated about you most is that you see people before you see problems. So I welcome to the show, Corey. speaker-1: People before you see problems. So I welcome to the show, Corey. speaker-0: Thank you. I'm excited to be here. Thank you, John. Elliot Humiston: Thank you. I'm to be here. Thank you, Jenna. So Corey, this isn't your first podcast. It is not. But go ahead. So you were just telling us your first story. I actually was looking. I think I think I've done about twenty five over the last five or six years. And popular girl. speaker-1: So Corey, this isn't your first podcast. But go ahead. So you were just telling us your story. speaker-0: It is not I actually was looking. I think I think I've done about twenty five over the last five or six years and speaker-2: Popular girl. speaker-0: No, it just I think people really enjoy podcasts and I think it's always fun to have that opportunity to share a little bit about you know, how you can help somebody. So the very first podcast I did was in two thousand seventeen and I did no preparation, Elliot Humiston: No, it just I think people really enjoy podcasts and I think it's always fun to have that opportunity to share a little bit about you know, how you can help somebody. So the very first podcast I did was in two thousand seventeen and I did no preparation. speaker-0: not sure what to really expect. I thought the person was just gonna interview me. I had just started my third dental business, so I thought he was gonna wanna talk to me about my my my business. And it was it ended up being a really fun time because he did talk to me about Elliot Humiston: Not sure what to really expect. I thought the person was just gonna interview me. I had just started my third dental business, so I thought he was gonna want to talk to me about my business. And it was it ended up being a really fun time because he did talk to me about speaker-0: About my business, but he was really sassy, and I just wasn't really sure what to do. So I tried to match the sass with it. And then when we were done with the podcast, I was like, I don't know what to do. And he goes, That was the best ever. We so much fun. But selfishly, it Elliot Humiston: my business, but he was really sassy, and I just wasn't really sure what to do, so I tried to match the sass with it. And then when we were done with the podcast, I was like, I don't know what to do. And he goes, That was the best ever. It was so much fun. But selfishly, it it was amazing because it really launched my business. We had so there was so he had such a great following that it really my phone rang off the hook six months into business so it was for me a marketing speaker-0: it was amazing because it really launched my business. We had so there was so he had such a great following that it really my phone rang off the hook six months into business. So it was for me a marketing. Elliot Humiston: like amazement. It was so much fun. But after that I've been trying to be a little bit more prepared for podcasts so I know what to expect if if what tone I'm supposed to go with. I speaker-0: Like amazement. It was so much fun. But after that I've been trying to be a little bit more prepared for podcasts. So I know what to expect if if what tone I'm supposed to go with. speaker-1: I mean it yeah, we've we always have our little like email that we send out but and we have our outlines but we usually end up like we never make Elliot Humiston: mean yeah we've we always have our little like email that we send out but and we have our outlines but we usually end up like we never make It to the third or fourth page, which is which is a John always gets excited when the pages go down. I do. Yeah. I'm a fan of organic conversation, and I think this crew right here can do some good stuff. But we knew do need a starting off point. Right. Right? So, like that's always good. Yeah. Okay, okay. So speaker-1: it to the third or fourth page, which is which is a John always gets excited when the pages go down. speaker-2: Do. I'm a fan of organic conversation and I think this crew right here can do some good stuff. But we knew do need a starting off point. Right. Right? So like that's always good. Yeah. For Elliot Humiston: well, let's start off kind of at the end and the beginning here. Like one of the things that I've always admired about you is you had a plan of what's your success. speaker-1: Well, let's start off kind of at the end and the beginning here. Like one of the things that I've always admired about you is you had a plan of what's your success looked like. And our like theme of this first season of the podcast is the journey. So it's kind of interesting talking to someone who's at the end of one journey and at the beginning of another. So I think you told me fifty one or fifty-two you wanted to be retired by when I first Elliot Humiston: looked like and our like theme of this first season of the podcast is the journey. So it's kind of interesting talking to someone who's at the end of one journey and at the beginning of another. So I think you told me 51 or 52 you wanted to be retired by when speaker-0: Mr. Elliot, I wanted to be fifty. I just turned fifty we're not fifty one yet. Not anywhere close. Not anywhere close. Elliot Humiston: I first turned 50. We're not 51 yet. I apologize. Not anywhere close. Not anywhere clothes. Not anywhere close rebellishing the 50. For those speaker-1: I apologize. Any more closer. speaker-2: For those Elliot Humiston: who think you can't see the expressions on people's faces. speaker-2: listening you can't see the expressions on people's faces or speaker-1: Ha ha ha. speaker-0: Yes. Don't age me yet. Elliot Humiston: Yes. Don't age me yet. You wanted to s you wanted to reti you had a very specific age in mind and I remember you being close to it and I went speaker-1: You wanted to s you wanted to retire you had a very specific age in mind and I remember you being close to it and I went, She doesn't seem to be slowing down at all. Elliot Humiston: She doesn't seem to be slowing down at all. Yeah. speaker-0: Yeah. So I I really think it's important and I and to your point, I really think it's important to design the life you want. Elliot Humiston: So I I really think it's important and I and to your point, I really think it's important to design the life you want. speaker-0: And you know that if you've ever had conversations with me about that, I feel very strongly about it and I practice what I preach. Design the life you want. Cool. And that means getting really organic and really granular with what time and what day and what are you doing. And then sticking to that plan the best that you can. Obviously there are times where life happens and Elliot Humiston: And you know that if you've ever had conversations with me about that, I feel very strongly about it. I practice what I preach. Design the life you want. Cool. And that means getting really organic and really granular with what time and what day and what are you doing. And then sticking to that plan the best that you can. Obviously there are times where life happens. Sure. speaker-0: things we can't control happen and maybe our plan goes off course and that journey might change a little bit. But if you stick with the plan, Elliot Humiston: Things we can't control happen, and maybe our plan goes off course, and that journey might change a little bit. But if you stick with the plan, speaker-0: you know, trust the process, it'll work. Elliot Humiston: you know, trust the process, it'll work. speaker-0: So to your point, years ago, I mean I had an entrepreneurial bug since I was a child. I've always had a business. That's always been my shtick, I guess. And Elliot Humiston: So to your point, years ago, I mean I had an entrepreneurial bug since I was a child. I've always had a business. That's always been my shtick, I guess. And years ago I thought, well, I'm gonna retire when I turn 50. That sounded like a pretty old age at the time. And so I was like, okay, this is what I'm going to do. And so a couple years ago I started that process of being like, Okay, you know, we're getting three or four years out of fifty. What's my speaker-0: Years ago I thought, well, I'm gonna retire when I turn fifty. That sounded like a pretty old age at the time. And so I was like, okay, this is what I'm going to do. And so a couple years ago, I started that process of being like, okay, you know, we're getting three or four years out of fifty. What's my speaker-1: Ha ha. speaker-0: exit plan? Because at that, my last company that I owned was a practice management company for dental offices, private practice dental offices. Elliot Humiston: Exit plan because at that my last company that I owned was a practice management company for dental offices, private practice dental offices. And so who was going to be my potential buyer? And so journeying down that path, and that path went a few different ways with a couple different potential buyers that didn't work out, and I didn't know what was going to happen. Was I going to meet that deadline of 50 years old and I was going to be out or not? And the truth of the matter was I wasn't looking to speaker-0: And so who was going to be my potential buyer? And so jo journeying down that path and that path went a few different ways with a couple of different potential buyers that didn't work out and I didn't know what was going to happen. Was I going to meet that deadline of fifty years old and I was gonna be out or not? And the truth of the matter was I wasn't looking to Elliot Humiston: To leave because I was miserable or burnt out. I really enjoy enjoyed my offices very, very much. But again, it was a design to s speaker-0: leave because I was miserable or burnt out. I really enjoy enjoyed my offices very, very much. But again, it was a design to Elliot Humiston: to create something different. And then out of the blue, a buyer came to say that she was interested in purchasing, and the process was 90 days and we closed rather quickly. It was really fast. It was really fast. But it was fast. And speaker-0: to create something different. And then out of the blue, a buyer came to say that she was interested in purchasing and the process was ninety days and we closed rather quickly. It was really fast. And speaker-1: Really fast. speaker-2: Yeah. Elliot Humiston: I remember my staff was like shocked. And I was like, I kind of like I mean she kind of speaker-1: I remember my staff was like shocked. And I was like, I kind of like I mean, she kept Elliot Humiston: telling me she wanted to retire by fifty. I just didn't know if I quite believed her, but it's Corey, so I I wasn't shocked. I like read it and I was like, alright, she did it. Yeah, yeah. It happened really quick. But I will say it was not a smooth transition. And so speaker-1: telling me she wanted to retire by fifty. I just didn't know if I quite believed her, but it's Corey, so I I wasn't shocked. I like read it and I was like, all right, she did it. speaker-0: Yeah, yeah. It happened really quick. But I will say, it was not a smooth transition. And so there are great so fast. It's so fast. But then to also just note for anyone looking to to look at transitions to make sure you're psychologically prepared too. Because I had been prepared, yes, I'm fifty and this is what I want to do. But Elliot Humiston: There are great so fast. It's so fast. But then to also just note for anyone looking to to look at transitions to make sure you're psychologically prepared too. Because I had been prepared, yes, I'm fifty and this is what I want to do, but speaker-0: you know, to look at something you've created and f put your blood, sweat and tears into and sell it to someone. And again, I've sold this is my third business, so I've done this before. This was different and it wasn't smooth. And a communications coach would have been ideal in our situation for sure. So I do want to always let people know that you can have a healthy business transition with the right systems in place, just like anything. And Elliot Humiston: you know, to look at something you've created and put your blood, sweat, and tears into and sell it to someone. And again, I've sold this is my third business, so I've done this before. This was different and it wasn't smooth. And a communications coach would have been ideal in our situation for sure. So I do want to always let people know that you can have a healthy business transition with the right systems in place, just like anything. And I thought we were gonna be going down that path. speaker-0: I thought we were gonna be going down that path. But as we know in humanity, you're only in control of yourself. Right. We can't control others. We can't control other people that have a different idea. So you know, now here we are basically what, seven or eight months after the fact and just kind of regrouping a little bit and taking some time to Elliot Humiston: But as we know in humanity, you're only in control of yourself. Right. We can't control others. We can't control other people that have a different idea. So you know, now here we are basically what seven or eight months after the fact and just kind of regrouping a little bit and taking some time to figure speaker-1: Yeah. Elliot Humiston: out. speaker-0: I well, I'm also somebody who believes in having many revenues of income. Sure. So this was one business I sold. I Elliot Humiston: I well I'm also somebody who believes in having many revenues of income. Sure. So this was one business I sold. I speaker-0: still have an incorporation, of course. Right. So I'm I'm not completely like retired specifically. I'm definitely not sure I'm done working. I'm still coaching clients on a very minimal basis. And then also I do have a two other revenue streams as well. So Elliot Humiston: still have an incorporation of course. Right. So I'm I'm not completely like retired specifically. I'm definitely not sure I'm done working. I'm still coaching clients on a very minimal basis. And then also, I do have a two other revenue streams as well, so that's speaker-1: That's Elliot Humiston: that's cool. And I I liked what you said about it there being a psychological component too. And someone who went through a pretty crazy transition myself with me and my father. speaker-1: that's cool. And I I liked what you said about a there being a psychological component too. And someone who went through a pretty crazy transition myself with me and my father. that Elliot Humiston: That speaker-1: was like his one of the big problems is my father wasn't psychologically ready and it honestly, there was nothing gonna get him prepared for that because he just wasn't he wasn't willing to to deal with that. Elliot Humiston: was like his one of the big problems is my father wasn't psychologically ready And it honestly there was nothing gonna get him prepared for that because he just wasn't he wasn't willing to to deal with that. speaker-1: and then also talking to friends who are buying practices. We talked about this on the podcast that it's coming out in a week or two here about like I have a few friends who are buying a practice and they're calling me and they're like, What about this? What about that? I'm like giving them advice like, What if I screw it up? And I'm Elliot Humiston: And then also talking to friends who are buying practices. We talked about this on the podcast that's coming out in a week or two here about like I have a few friends who are buying a practice and they're calling me and they're like, what about this? What about that? And like giving them advice like what if I screw it up and speaker-1: like, Well, you will. Elliot Humiston: Like well you will. speaker-0: Yes, it's not going to be smooth. Elliot Humiston: Yes, it's not going to be smooth. Failure happens, right, John? speaker-1: Failure happens, right? speaker-2: Failure always happens. You gotta lean into it. That's how you learn. Yeah. You know? I'm going through right now with lots of other things, not like in this case, but you know, that's Elliot Humiston: Failure always happens. You gotta lean into it. That's how you learn. Yeah. You know? I'm going through right now with lots of other things, not like in this case, but you know speaker-2: how you learn. Elliot Humiston: How you learn. Yeah. speaker-2: So I I left the corporate world in twenty twenty four and went into business for myself. so and as you were saying before about like, you know, I'm just kind of taking a step back and I'm recalculating. So I I left my corporate job. I thought I wanted to Elliot Humiston: So I I left the corporate world in twenty twenty four and went into business for myself. so and as you were saying before about like, you know, I'm just kind of taking a step back and I'm recalculating. So I I left my corporate job. I thought I wanted to speaker-2: like go all in on like my business, but then like I found myself really missing the work, you know. Elliot Humiston: like go all in on like my business. But then like I found myself really missing the work, you know? And then an opportunity came along and here I am back in the corporate world. speaker-2: And then an opportunity came along and here I am back in the corporate world doing Elliot Humiston: Doing that. But that recalculation time is what I needed. I just I feel like I got a lot of juice left. Mm-hmm. You know, and I wanna I wanna pull the levers that I need to to to make a difference in apparently the flooring industry now. speaker-2: that. But that recalculation time is what I needed. I just I feel like I got a lot of juice left. You know, and I wanna I wanna pull the levers that I need to to to make a difference in apparently the flooring industry now. speaker-1: Ha ha ha ha. Elliot Humiston: Not just any flooring industry, right? The black flooring. The flat flooring industry. speaker-0: Not just any fluorine, speaker-1: Right. speaker-2: Flat flooring industry. Elliot Humiston: industry speaker-0: But that's cool that you say that because that means that's something you feel really strongly about and you want to put your all into that. And that's when when someone does take that recalibration time, you can take that break and come back even better. That's what's really cool about having like I'm I'm calling my time time right now more of a sabbatical than a retirement because yeah, I am f I am fifty and years ago that felt really old. Elliot Humiston: But that's cool that you say that because that means that's something you feel really strongly about and you want to put your all into that. And that's when when someone does take that recalibration time, you can take that break and come back even better. That's what's really cool about having like I'm I'm calling my tame time right now more of a sabbatical than a retirement because yeah, I am f I am fifty and years ago that felt really old. It's not. But you don't feel that way. But I don't feel that way. Right. And I I'm still living speaker-0: It's not but I don't feel that way. Right. And I I'm still lit speaker-1: But you don't feel Elliot Humiston: up by many cool things and I've had a lot of really neat opportunities that keep coming my way and I just keep saying, I'm taking a year. I'm not making any decisions for a year. You know, and so when you can do that, step back and come back, then it's like, wait, this was a cool thing to wait for. Or this was a neat job opportunity. speaker-0: up by many cool things and I've had a lot of really neat opportunities that keep coming my way and I just keep saying, I'm taking a year. I'm not making any decisions for a year. You know, and so when you can do that step back and come back, then it's like wait, this was a cool thing to wait for or this was a neat job opportunity. Elliot Humiston: It it really, it really was. And everything you said, and yes, yes, and yes, no for real. And I think it what it really did was it prepared me for how speaker-2: It it really it really was and everything you said and yes, yes, and yes, no for real. And I think it what it really did was it prepared me for how I was focusing on a lot of things of my old job that I should not have and it was holding me back from being where I wanted to be. Absolutely a hundred percent. Hundred percent. Elliot Humiston: I was focusing on a lot of things in my old job that I should not have, and it was holding me back from being where I wanted to be. You grew as a leader just in taking Absolutely. Hundred percent. Hundred percent. speaker-1: You grew as a leader just in taking Elliot Humiston: I think something that's always interesting to me when we're talking about these journeys and how we like got to how did we become who we became. speaker-1: I think something that's always interesting to me when we're talking about these journeys of how we like got to how did we become who we became. like there's always like turning point opportunities. And I know you said you've always been kind of had that entrepreneurial bug, but you're also you're a you're a you're a hygienist. You have a hygiene license. Elliot Humiston: Like there's always like turning point opportunities. And I know you said you've always been kind of had that entrepreneurial bug. But you're also you're a you're a you're a hygienist. You have a hygiene license. I have not worked clinically for a long time. Yes. But I like where was the turning point then? Yes. you know what it is? It's so interesting. because even it when I reflect on who I am as an entrepreneur. speaker-0: I have not worked clinically for a long time. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: you know what it is? It's so interesting. because even it when I reflect on who I am as an entrepreneur, Elliot Humiston: You know, I look back to the very early days of like babysitting, where like literally, so I grew up right across the street from a church, and I could use their church basement, and I would have like a hundred kids in there, and I'd charge families, you know, like twenty to forty bucks. And I I mean I'd come out with like a thousand dollars and I like money. This is how you know you want to be in business for yourself. I like money. speaker-0: you know, I look back to the very early days of like babysitting where like literally so I grew up right across the street from a church and I could use their church basement and I would have like a hundred kids in there and I'd charge families, you know, like twenty to forty bucks. And I r I mean I'd come out with like a thousand dollars and I like money. Like this is how you know you want to be in business for yourself. I like speaker-1: Mm. speaker-0: But it was like so impressed upon us as children that we needed an education, right? Sure. And so it wasn't like, okay, Corey's a hustler, she likes to make money, Elliot Humiston: But it was like so impressed upon us as children that we needed an education, right? Sure. And so it wasn't like okay, Corey's a hustler, she likes to make money. speaker-0: she's gonna babysit and even I paid for Marquette as a party planner, my own business, again, party planning. But it was like you need to get a degree. And so when I got introduced to dentistry at the very young age of nineteen, I w came became a dental assistant and I I still feel so blessed to say this to this day. Elliot Humiston: She's gonna babysit and even I paid for Marquette as a party planner, my own business again, party planning. But it was like you need to get a degree. And so when I got introduced to dentistry at the very young age of 19, I came became a dental assistant, and I I still feel so blessed to say this to this day. I, you know, 30 years later, I love dentistry still. And it even though we may change, right? Just industries may change, even John, you know, now you're in Florida. speaker-0: I you know, thirty years later, I love dentistry stuff. Yeah. And it even though we may change, right? Just industries may change, even John, you know, now you're in flooring. Yeah. We can change our industries, but I'm and still that's totally fine, but for some of us weird people, and it's usually those of us in dentistry of dentistry. And we are a breed. It's a very weird breed. They are great. And I I did start Elliot Humiston: we can change our industries, but I'm and still that's totally fine, but for some of us weird people and it's usually those of us in dentistry. Weird people. We love dentistry. And we are a breed. It's a very weird breed. Teeth are great. They are greed and give you lot of credit. I I did start speaker-2: Yeah. speaker-1: We will speaker-2: Give you a lot of credit. speaker-0: Well, it I know, my I've always tried to talk my kids into dentistry and none of them are like, We don't wanna be in anyone's mouth Elliot Humiston: Well, it I know, my I've always tried to talk my kids into dentistry, none of them like, We don't want to be in anyone's mouth. speaker-2: You know, after starting to work with Dr. Elliot, like, you know, over these last couple of years, like there's been a few times where I've like tried to put myself in your shoes because like empathy is like a one of my things. So like I'm like the thought of like looking in these mouths Elliot Humiston: You know, after starting to work with Doctor Elliott, like, you know, over these last couple of years, like there's been a few times where I've like tried to put myself in your shoes 'cause like empathy is like a one of the things. So like I'm like the thought of like looking in these mouths speaker-2: and the pictures I've seen. That's not for me. You know, and it's like that's cool. Elliot Humiston: in the pictures I've seen. That's not for me. You know? And it's like, that's cool. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: There's nothing wrong with you guys. Elliot Humiston: There's nothing wrong with you guys. For real. speaker-1: Some of my before and afters might be burned into your retinas a little bit. Elliot Humiston: Pretty much. But I mean he speaker-2: Pretty much. But I mean he does fantastic work. So I mean, like, you know, if there's a problem, he'll solve it. Elliot Humiston: does fantastic work. So I mean, like, you know, if there's a problem, he'll solve it. speaker-0: Well, Elliot Humiston: Well, l I mean, not to get statistical, but dental decay is still the number one disease worldwide. And so that is a really that's a significant problem. You heard it here first. I know I mean yesterday, I to Dr. Elliot's point, I do have a dental hygiene license. I don't see patients, but yesterday I saw children. speaker-0: l I mean not to get statistical, but dental decay is still the number one disease worldwide. And so that is a really that's a significant problem. speaker-2: You heard it here first. speaker-1: Ha ha ha. speaker-0: I know I mean yesterday I to Dr. Elliott's point, I do have a dental hygiene license. I don't see patients, but yesterday I saw children Elliot Humiston: at from the Boys and Girls Club, we did exams and profies, and some of these children had never seen a dentist before. And the oldest child I had that had not been to the dentist was 13 years old. Wow. I had a 33-year-old last week. Hasn't been to the dentist yet. Yeah. So yeah. So speaker-0: at from the Boys and Girls Club. We did exams and profies and some of these children had never seen a dentist before. And the oldest child I had that had not been to the dentist was thirteen years old. Wow. speaker-1: I had a thirty three year old last week, hasn't been to the dentist yet. So yeah. speaker-0: it's it's it's odd you would think in today's society that would not be a thing, but it is and I I really enjoyed it, but it did not make me want to go back to hygiene. I can tell you that. Even with the even with the wages being as they are. But if Elliot Humiston: it's it's it's odd you would think in today's society that would not be a thing, but it is. And I really enjoyed it, but it did not make me want to go back to hygiene. I can tell you that. Even with the wages, even with the wages. But if you speaker-0: you ever I could probably be talked into it 'cause I am actually in negotiations right now to do some hygiene for a doctor who's a third generation dentist. I worked for his his grandpa and his dad. really? And I it w it's me who says, Can I come and do Elliot Humiston: Ever I could probably be talked into it because I am actually in negotiations right now to do some hygiene for a doctor who's a third generation dentist. I worked for his his grandpa and his dad. really? And I it was it's me who says, Can I come and do some hygiene for you? He's like, Yeah. And I said, I'm gonna need four patients. And then that's on my bucket list. I've done th three generations. That's pretty cool. That's really awesome. So I I just told him I said I'm I'm really rusty, but if you give me four patients that are really easy. speaker-0: Some hygiene for you? He's like, Yeah. And I said, I'm gonna need four patients. And then that's on my bucket list. I've done thir three generations. That's pretty cool. Cool. So and I just told him, I said, I'm I'm really rusty, but if you give me four patients that are really easy, then speaker-1: That's really awesome. Elliot Humiston: And I can lock it off my fifty year old bucket list that I've done four or three generations of h of hygiene checks with you guys, that would that would be speaker-0: I can lock it off my fifty year old bucket list that I've done four or three generations of of hygiene checks with you guys, that would that would be Elliot Humiston: cool. That'd be really cool. So you keep kind of referencing the bucket list. Sure. And as being as like motivated and I can tell you're very strong and I love it. I feel the energy. So like the list, there's a list that you have and it seems like it's very important. speaker-2: keep kind of referencing the bucket list. Sure. And as being as like motivated and I can tell you're very strong and I love it. I feel the energy. So like the list there is a list that you have and it seems like it's very important. speaker-0: Yeah, I would say it is. I think again, going back to designing your life, Elliot Humiston: Yeah, I would say it is. I think again, going back to designing your life speaker-0: it's really important to me and I find working with people, it's very important to have some sort of Elliot Humiston: It's really important to me and I find working with people, it's very important to have some sort of goal, or maybe goal is a strong word for some, but some sort of flow to what you've got one life. We've only been creating for one life, in my opinion. What are you going to do with your time and what are you gonna do with that? There's so so oftentimes I hear people just say, I wish I could do that. Well then go freaking do it. Mm-hmm. Like what's What are you doing about it? Yeah, what's preventing you from doing it? Do you need to save the money? speaker-0: Goal or maybe goal is a strong word for some, but some sort of flow to what you've got one life. We've only been created for one life, in my opinion. What are you going to do with your time and what are you gonna do with that? There's so so often times I hear people just say, I wish I could do that. Well then go freaking do it. Like Yeah, what's preventing you from doing it? Do you need to save the money speaker-2: Mm-hmm. Elliot Humiston: to do that activity? Do you need to, you know, speaker-0: to do that activity? Do you need to, you know Elliot Humiston: if you really want to do something, you're gonna do it. Right. And so that's that's really where this bucket list kind of comes from is, you know, if I want to do something, I'm gonna just do it. And sometimes that means sacrificing something else or saving money or saving time or waiting. You don't get everything right now. You know, there's different seasons in life where now I can do this because And that's about waiting what the opportunity is in front of you, whether speaker-0: If you really want to do something, you're gonna do it. Right. And so that's that's really where this bucket list kind of comes from is you know, if I wanna do something, I'm gonna just do it. And sometimes that means sacrificing something else or saving money or saving time or waiting. Not you don't get everything right now. You know, there's different seasons in life where now I can do this because speaker-1: That's about weighing what the opportunity is in front of you, whether Elliot Humiston: H I think every opportunity is probably worth investigating. But I think something that a lot of entrepreneurs, including myself, to like a pretty big degree, is we're always chasing the next thing sometimes and we lose focus on what we're working on right then. But I think it's important that we tap out when we're like, hey, this is not the right opportunity rather than forcing one. speaker-1: I think every opportunity is probably worth investigating. But I think something that a lot of entrepreneurs, including myself, to like a pretty big degree, is we're always chasing the next thing sometimes and we lose focus on what we're working on right then. But I think it's important that we tap out when we're like, hey, this is not the right opportunity rather than forcing one. speaker-0: Mm-hmm. That for me came with age. Mm-hmm. Cause honestly people keep asking me Elliot Humiston: That for me came with age. Okay. Because honestly people keep asking me speaker-1: Okay. speaker-0: what's next, what's next. I literally don't have an answer. Elliot Humiston: What's next? What's next? I literally don't have an answer. Has has it like leaving your company, like selling your company that you built for a very long time, you were to the point where you could say no to certain clients. I remember you telling me that. Like, no, I don't need you. Correct. We're not gonna work well together, so we're not gonna do it. I'm not gonna force it. Correct. speaker-1: Has has it like leaving your company, like selling your company that you built for a very long time? You were to the point where you could say no to certain clients. I remember you telling me that, like, no, I don't need you. We're not gonna work well together, so we're not gonna do it. I'm not gonna force it. Correct. did you have any identity shift or like moment? Yeah, for sure. Elliot Humiston: Did you have any identity shift or like moment or Yeah, I'm actually still working through it Yeah, for sure. speaker-0: I'm actually still working through it. Elliot Humiston: I'm I have a coach as well. Like I don't believe in in you know I mean you could do some self coaching too, but I have a coach as well and I'm working through some different questions because when you are an entrepreneur, your identity is so wrapped up speaker-0: I have a coach as well. Like I don't believe in in, you know, I mean you can do some self coaching too, but I have a coach as well and I'm working through some different questions because when you are an entrepreneur, your identity is so wrapped up in your business. So even yesterday I was working in an ex in the x ray department and with with this doctor, and he was like, you're Corey. Custom dental solutions, Corey. I had never met him before. Elliot Humiston: In your business. So even yesterday I was working in an ex in the x-ray department and with with this doctor, and he was like, you're Corey. Custom dental solutions Corey. I had never met him before. speaker-0: And I was like I know right away it hit me though. It hit in the gut and it was like, yeah. Elliot Humiston: And I was like, right away it hit me though. Hit in the gut, and it was like, yeah. speaker-0: And then I said, and after I got to know who he was, I said, that's right. You you bought your your practice about three years ago. We had a conversation, he moved ahead with a different consulting firm. Uh-huh. You know? Yeah. He didn't pick me to be his person. And it was weird because probably if I would have owned custom, I probably would have been like still Elliot Humiston: And then I said, and after I got to know who he was, I said, that's right, you you bought your your practice about three years ago. We had a conversation. He moved ahead with a different consulting firm. you know. Yeah. He didn't pick me to be his person. And it was weird because probably if I would have owned custom, I probably would have been like still trying a little bit. speaker-1: Haslana Love. speaker-0: I would have been pissed he didn't pick us and This is what you missed. And yet yesterday I was just like I could really care less. It's not my company anymore. Elliot Humiston: I would have been pissed he didn't pick us. And I would have been this is what you missed. And yet yesterday I was just like I could really care less. It's not my company anymore. speaker-1: Ha ha ha. my gosh, that must Elliot Humiston: my gosh, that must speaker-1: give you such a big like feeling of freedom. Elliot Humiston: give you such a big like feeling of freedom. It speaker-0: It is. It is a good f it is a nice fe freedom feeling for sure. Elliot Humiston: is. It is a good it is a nice fe freedom feeling for sure. speaker-0: but I also I kinda I had to watch myself 'cause I wanted to talk transition. I wanted to talk I know stuff about his team. Like I know stuff. And it's like, no, that's not your space anymore. Right. That's not your place. That season's over. You're here on a charity event. He's here in a charity event. You're checking x rays together. No. Right. So there is a huge identity shift. Elliot Humiston: But I also I kinda I had to watch myself 'cause I wanted to talk transition. I wanted to talk I know stuff about his team. Like I know stuff. It's like, no, that's not your space anymore. Right. That's not your place. That season's over. You're here in a charity event. He's here in a charity event. You're checking x-rays together. Yeah. That's not the time or the place. No, right. So there is a huge identity shift. and then with people, what do they do when you meet them? What do you do for work? What are you supposed to say? I'm retired. speaker-0: and then when people what do they do when you meet them? What do you do for work? What are you supposed to say? I'm retired. Elliot Humiston: what do you get? Married to someone really rich? Yeah. Mm-hmm. Like, it's weird. speaker-0: what are you married to someone really rich? Yeah. Mm-hmm. Like it's weird. Elliot Humiston: Wow, that sucks that you like go down that path. Have you experienced that much? For sure. my god, that's disgusting. For sure. No. I actually hate asking people what they do. speaker-2: Wow, that sucks that you like go down that path. Have you experienced that much? Sure. my God, that's disgusting. I actually hate asking people what they do. speaker-0: Four sure. No speaker-2: it's just so hard to kind of like do it in a cool way where it's like gonna spark the positive energy or good engaging conversation. Cause like, yeah, to your point, like, hey, w if you asked me what I did when I was twenty one, I'd be like Elliot Humiston: It's just so hard to kind of like do it in a cool way where it's like gonna spark the positive energy or good engaging conversation. 'Cause like, yeah, to your point, like, hey, w if you asked me what I did when I was twenty one, I'd be like, I work at Kohler Company in the factory. And your response would be of course. speaker-2: I work at Kohler Company in the factory. And your response would be: cool. Cool. Nice to meet you. Bye. Elliot Humiston: Cool. Nice to meet you, bye. speaker-1: I I take it as a challenge though. I actually love asking people what they do because I have to s I have to spark a conversation in the dental chair when people are feeling awkward. So I like somebody tells me they work in the foundry at Kohler and the brass polishing do they got AC yet? Like that's the things I'm asking. You know, it's it's really hot this time of year in that. Elliot Humiston: I I take it as a challenge though. I actually love asking people what they do because I have to s I have to spark a conversation in the dental chair when people are sure and awkward. So I like somebody tells me they work in the foundry at Kohler and the brass polishing. Do they got AC yet? Like that's the things I'm asking. You don't have AC yet. Yeah. You know, it's it's really hot this time of year in the past. That's you know what that's true though. There's curiosity in that speaker-2: Yeah. Like that. speaker-0: True though. There's curiosity in that question. Elliot Humiston: question. Yeah. But there's also judgment in that question. Right. So where is it coming from? Is it coming from a heart of judgment? And I automatically assume, they're sizing me up. They want to know what I do for work. speaker-0: Yeah. But there's also judgment in that question. Right. So where is it coming from? Is it coming from a heart of judgment? And I automatically assume, they're sizing me up. They want to know what I do for work. And maybe it is out of curiosity. I've never thought about it. Because sometimes I'm just looking to see who somebody is. Like for me, of course, it's like what kind of personality are they attracted to a certain type of work or something along those lines as well. Elliot Humiston: And maybe it is out of curiosity. I've never thought about it. Because sometimes I'm just looking to see who somebody is. Like for me, of course, it's like what kind of personality are they attracted to a certain type of work or something along those lines as well. speaker-0: But no, we want to know who is this person and what do they do and am I gonna connect with them at all? Like do I have anything in common with someone who works at Kohler? I don't know. I see your fixtures all over the country. Tell me more about You know, like a curious question versus, you work Elliot Humiston: But no, we want to know who is this person and what do they do? And am I gonna connect with them at all? Like, do I have anything in common with someone who works at Kohler? I don't know. I see your fixtures all over the country. Tell me more about them. You know, like a curious question versus you were in the factory there well I'm a dentist we have nothing in common yeah that's an interesting point speaker-0: in the factory there? Well, I'm a dentist. We have nothing in common. Yeah, that's an interesting point. speaker-1: for me it's usually work is where I can sometimes find my way into a conversation to relate with a person. Like I find hobbies harder to be like involved with. Like for somebody's like like I really like fishing and I'm like, I've gone fishing. Elliot Humiston: for me it's usually work is where I can sometimes find my way into a conversation to relate with a person. Like I find hobbies harder to be like involved with like for somebody's like like I really like fishing and I'm like I've gone fishing speaker-1: That's what I got. Elliot Humiston: That's what I got. speaker-2: All the years I worked at Mercury I never caught a fish. Only seaweed. For real. Elliot Humiston: All the years I worked at Mercury, I never caught a fish. Only seaweed. For real. speaker-1: That Elliot Humiston: That is so funny. But but you know what I'm saying? everyone's got a job usually. Like you work at a gas station. Man, tell me about some of like the crazy people that walk in gl like at night or things like that. speaker-1: is so funny. But but do you know what I'm saying? everyone's got a job usually. Like you work at a gas station. Man, tell me about some of like the crazy people that walk in clo like at night or things like that. So speaker-2: for sure. I would totally lean into that. Right. Like, okay, tell me your like Elliot Humiston: for sure. I would totally lean into that, right? Like, okay, tell me you're like speaker-2: most obscene story that you've dealt with. Go. I'm sitting. I'm waiting. Like, cause I'm sure there's just some wild stuff that like would have happened, right? Like, yeah, there's totally ways to like bring in the energy, right? And be like, come on, give me something good. Elliot Humiston: most obscene story that you've dealt with. Go, I'm sitting, I'm waiting. Like, because I'm sure there's just some wild stuff that like would have happened, right? Like yeah, there's totally ways to like bring in the energy, right? Be like, come on, give me something good. speaker-0: So as Dr. Elliot knows I do a lot I did a lot of communications work, right? And so one of the sessions that I went to, the one of the questions you're supposed to ask s someone instead of like, Hey, I'm Corey and whatever, what do you do for work or whatever? You're supposed to say, What do you want me to know about you? Elliot Humiston: So as Dr. Elliott knows, I do a lot I did a lot of communications work, right? And so one of the sessions that I went to, the one of the questions you're supposed to ask some someone instead of like, Hey, I'm Corey and whatever, what do you do for work or whatever? You're supposed to say, What do you want me to know about you? Just get to the point. What do you want me to know about speaker-2: Just get to the point. What do you want me to know about you? Elliot Humiston: you? I feel so awkward about that conversation. Like I feel like it's too deep right away, don't you? Yeah, yeah, I do. I'm like that's like I'm not sure I would really somebody I just met like speaker-1: I feel so awkward about that conversation. Like Yeah, I do. I'm like that speaker-0: feel like it's too deep right away, don't you? I'm not sure I would really somebody I just met, like I just met you, John, I don't think I still would feel comfortable saying, hey, tell me what I need to know about you instead of hey, what do you do for work? Elliot Humiston: I just met you, John. I don't think I still would feel comfortable saying, hey, tell me what I need to know about you, instead of, hey, what do you do for work? So speaker-2: So it's interesting. So me being a market me being a marketing guy, you know, I'm just kinda like, That's my job. Right? Like, how can I present you with the clearest and most digestible information as fast as possible? Elliot Humiston: it's interesting. So me being a marketing guy, you know, I'm just kinda like, that's my job. Right? Like how can I present you with the clearest and most digestible information as fast as possible? speaker-1: I might yeah. Elliot Humiston: I might yeah. Because like speaker-2: Like I'm on the other end of the spectrum of of your question because I also agree with your stance on it. Sure. Elliot Humiston: I'm on the other end of the spectrum of of your question because I also agree with your stance on it. Sure. You know? speaker-0: No but don't you think it seems like in a job interview kinda like, Well what do you want me to know about you? I don't know. Like I'm a happy Elliot Humiston: But don't you think it seems like a a job interview kind of like, well what do you want me to know about you? I don't know. Like I'm happy speaker-0: person. I really enjoy it is. Elliot Humiston: I really enjoyed question speaker-2: A loaded question. speaker-1: Is is like the is the like maybe the step below that, like tell me about yourself. Like could we go so go with that? But then Yeah, that's man. Elliot Humiston: whatever. It is. Tell me about yourself. Like, could we go so go with that? But that's loaded. Yeah, that's It speaker-2: Loaded? speaker-0: It is, then they're gonna they're then they're they're gonna tell you what their identity is. Elliot Humiston: is. Then they're gonna they're then they're they're gonna tell you what their identity is. Yeah, now speaker-2: Now we get to the weather today. Right? Right. You know, and then you you squeeze in the weather and it's like, okay, that one didn't work. Elliot Humiston: we get to the weather today. Yeah. Right? Right. You know, and then you you squeeze in the weather and it's like, okay, that one didn't work. when it comes to like communication one thing that you've worked really hard on was speaker-1: when it comes to like communication one thing that you've worked really hard on was Elliot Humiston: understanding group dynamics and team dynamics. using disk and then just a a ton of experience. speaker-1: understanding group dynamics and team dynamics using disk and then just a a ton of experience. speaker-2: I love this topic. Keep going. Do you? Yes, I do. Keep going. And I'm very can I tell I'm sorry. I'm so I'm so sorry. I've been very excited about this. Right. Okay. And full disclosure, he knows that like he'll send me the the deck like the documents before and I know you know when I open 'cause you get like a notification. Yeah, yeah, I'm not dumb. Okay. So Elliot Humiston: I love this topic. Keep going. Do you? Yes, I do. Keep going. And I'm very can tell I'm sorry, I'm so I'm so sorry. I've been very excited about this. right. Okay, and full disclosure, he knows that like he'll send me the the deck like the documents before and I know you know when I open 'cause you get like a notification. Yeah, yeah, I'm not done. Okay. So So like but this one I was I like not that the other people weren't, it was just like that's organic for me, but this I really wanted to understand more about you. Yeah and speaker-2: like but this one I was I like not that the other people weren't. It was just like that's organic for me. But this I really wanted to understand more about you. And Elliot Humiston: I'm really excited for this part of the podcast. So we may go over on time. speaker-2: I'm really excited for this part of the podcast. And we may go over on time. Elliot Humiston: But that's okay, so disc is something that I knew about before I met you. I later found out that the person who introduced me to disc was introduced to disc by you. yeah. That's cool. speaker-1: That's okay. so disc is something that I knew about before I met you. I later found out that the person who introduced me to disc was introduced to disc by you. Yeah. That's cool. just talking about disc and like group dynamics. Elliot Humiston: just talking about disk and like group dynamics. speaker-1: what was the point that made you like investigate, like, hey, I want to use personality assessments, which is what disc is? Yeah. Was there like you just had like a really awful time working with someone and you're like, I need to understand it like I feel like there's gotta be a Elliot Humiston: was the point that made you like investigate? Like, hey, I want to use personality assessments, which is what disc is. Yeah. Was there like you just had like a really awful time working with someone and you're like, I need to understand it? Yeah. I feel like there's gotta be a story. speaker-0: Yeah. There's Elliot Humiston: There's always a story, right? There's something always really cool. So this is the story, and you guys are gonna be the first ones to hear it. Alright, we're all gonna have stories, you go first. I know. So it's not even work related, it's personal. Okay. speaker-0: always a story, right? There's something always really cool. So this is the story and you guys are gonna be the first ones to hear it. First. I know. So it's not even work related, it's personal. Okay. speaker-2: All we're all gonna have stories. By the way, the lady keeps saying she's fifty and looks thirty five is gonna go first. Okay, for real, you look fantastic. Elliot Humiston: By the way, the lady that keeps saying she's fifty and looks thirty-five deciding. Thanks, John. so I will go first and I'll try to keep it as as possible. Details in You want the you want the details, then then it's gonna be juicy. So I grew up in a house that was really like celebratory towards your own opinion and being very dynamic and being very dominant and loud and emotionally unregulated, like Bravo Corey, stand up for yourself and give your opinion. speaker-0: Thanks, John. so I will go first and I'll try to keep it as as you want the details, then it's gonna be juicy. So I grew up in a house that was really like celebratory towards your own opinion and being very dynamic and being very dominant and loud and emotionally unregulated. Like, Bravo, Corey, stand up for yourself and give your opinion. speaker-2: No, no, no details. speaker-1: Ha ha. Whatever. speaker-0: And Elliot Humiston: And so, but let's all be real, that's not accepted in the real world, right? So you know, kind of going out into the real world and and realizing that you need to keep your mouth shut at times, or you know, not everybody works at speaker-0: so but let's all be real, that's not accepted in the real world, right? So you know, kinda going out into the real world and and realizing that you need to keep your mouth shut at times. Or, you know, not everybody works at Elliot Humiston: the same pace that you do, right? Like I'm running a hundred miles an hour, but the person behind me is running at 30 miles an hour. That does not mean they're bad and I'm good, or vice versa. So it really grew from that. And then to get really juicy, I speaker-0: the same pace that you do, right? Like I'm running a hundred miles an hour, but the person behind me is running at thirty miles an hour. That does not mean they're bad and I'm good or vice versa. So it really grew from that. And then to get really juicy, I Elliot Humiston: I was divorced at 30 years old, 31, and I started dating at 34. speaker-0: was divorced at thirty years old, thirty-one, and I started dating at thirty four. And I really liked this guy. I thought he was really, really smart. looking back he really wasn't even that attractive, but he Elliot Humiston: And I really liked this guy. I thought he was really, really smart. looking back, he really wasn't even that attractive, but he was speaker-2: A lot of past tense words being used right now, just so we're clear, reading the cues. Elliot Humiston: a lot of past tense words in you right now, so we're clear. Right, he's really smart. I know he was a business owner, and I just I was really honestly more attracted to him because I thought he was brilliant. Anyway. speaker-0: Right. He's really smart. I know he was a business owner and I just I was really honestly more attracted to him because I thought he was brilliant. Anyway, he I think had some problems with my emotional dysregulation. And he was one who kind of started talking about personality assessments and things with me. And at the time I owned a dental staffing company, so I wasn't involved with practices like I w was re more recently. And the long and the short of it is the guy broke my heart. And Elliot Humiston: He I think had some problems with my emotional dysregulation. And he was one who kind of started talking about personality assessments and things with me. And at the time I owned a dental staffing company, so I wasn't involved with practices like I w was re more recently. And the long and the short of it is the guy broke my heart. And it was because I took his personality assessment and I wasn't what he was looking for. speaker-0: It was because I took his personality assessment and I wasn't what he was looking for. Elliot Humiston: my goodness. Dude. Do you guys want to know if I've seen him since I have? And yeah, I'm doing way better than he is. speaker-0: Do you guys want to know if I've seen him since I have and yeah, I'm doing way better than he is. Elliot Humiston: I love that. Yeah, because that's always like the danger. Like I give a personal I give somebody a disc assessment, they think I'm gonna judge them on it. I'm like, look, look. speaker-1: I love that. Yeah, because that's always like the danger. Like I give a personal I give somebody a disc assessment and they think I'm gonna judge them on it. And I'm like, look, like you've already become like if I've if I'm paying for you to take this assessment, it means that Yeah, I either speaker-0: You've already passed this step. speaker-1: want you on my team or I don't, and it's not gonna be the deciding factor. I just need to know if I can communicate with speaker-0: That's exactly right. And that's exactly how it needs to be presented. Yeah. Is that this is a tool for best communication. This isn't I'm having you take this assessment because I don't think you're the right girl for me. Like that's super cool. No, it's not. speaker-2: That's not And I and I think I I'm just gonna go on record, recorded. That's horrible. It's horri speaker-1: Holy cow take, John. it a disc assessment you took? speaker-0: Okay. I think so. Okay. I don't I I don't remember at the time, he never showed me the results. And so then of course I become obsessed with what the heck was this? And then I knew that other people in industry were utilizing assessments more for team building and things. But that's why, and you know this about me too. You and you get my canned email, what does it say? There's no right or wrong. There's no good or bad. Please, this is not a label. This is a this is simply a tool. And that stems from that personal connection of of never moving forward in my relationship. But I ended up meeting the best man ever less than a year later, and we are married now, 13 years. Congrats. So speaker-2: Yeah. speaker-0: and he is the opposite of my disc assessment. Yes. And I would not have thought that would be who I should marry because you'd think that would be frustrating, right? Somebody who's at a different level, but it's actually so awesome. Yeah. speaker-2: Paula Abdul. Did she not say it? Opposites attract. speaker-0: That's right. speaker-2: I learned in nineteen eighty eight. speaker-0: Got old Paula. speaker-1: It was the year before I was born. speaker-2: Okay, I don't feel old enough. speaker-0: Right. speaker-2: Now that's happening to me. speaker-0: So now that we've obviously established nothing is good, bad, right or wrong, there's not like I have a better disc than somebody else or you know, those types of things. If we know how to communicate with our team members and we have better understanding of who we're working with, and I always use my husband as an example because there's you know, if we understand disk, I'm really fast paced and he's more moderately to slow pace, that can be extremely frustrating. speaker-2: yes. speaker-0: But I know that and I'm aware of it. And it's like, where are we gonna meet? And so we've designed our own questions as a couple of I I'm I'm feeling really frustrated and you need to either meet my pace or we need to talk or there's gonna be an an issue. So That's really helpful in relationships, communication. I mean, I don't wanna say we don't fight 'cause we really don't. Mm-hmm. And we don't have issues because it's literally calling out like our communication styles are very different. Our value system is a little bit different with a few things. Let's talk, let's make it work. And and it's really a nice balance too. So speaker-1: just briefly, I don't think we've actually defined disc. Disc is a personality assessment. It also tests motivators and emotional intelligence. and my wife and I have both taken it. I took mine way before hers, so she knew everything about she was able to read it about me. but by the time she took her test, I had been educated enough on disc that I had already kind of figured it out. but I don't I like bullet points and a handful of deal details on how to make my decision and then I wanna but Desiree wants to talk through everything and and so we have to find that happy medium because w one of us is gonna get stressed out either way. So that's where the c that's like a really good example of the communication of how the communication has to happen and being aware that We're gonna think about this differently and we're just gonna have to find the happy middle ground is important because we are literally on the opposite side of the spectrum on that on that area. speaker-0: But you're capable of meeting in the middle too. And that's where again that healthiness of nothing's right, wrong, good or bad, it's let's meet in the middle if we can. speaker-2: And speaker-0: It's the effort. And again, that does require both people being willing. Of course, again, you can't control anyone el other than yourself. But even if you're a leader of a team and you know everyone's personality styles and you know how to talk to them, you know someone's gonna want to give you more details. Or you're gonna know this person also likes bullet points, or this person's gonna be slower paced or more emotional connected, or they're gonna wanna sit and talk to me about every detail about their trip and I'm gonna have to sit here and be like, I only have ten minutes. speaker-1: I get so excited when I get to write an email to another D personality because I know I can only all I need is five bullet points in a few sentences and the whole email will make sense to them. speaker-0: Yes, exactly. speaker-2: I wanna like kind of speaker-1: So yeah. speaker-2: prove the theory here that so I use a personality test. I've done a lot of them, right? But the one that has stood out to me was called authentic confidence. And when I was still working at Mercury, they brought in an individual, Brian, to facilitate it amongst my boss's leadership team. Okay. So so we all got to do it, and that is where I learned. about the communication style. Like I had never factored it into why I had issues working with certain individuals or anything like that. So the example is so like I tested out and you're not gonna believe this. I'm a friend maker. speaker-0: Ha ha ha ha. speaker-1: Whoa, shocking. speaker-2: So and this reactor. Right. So like this is why like the personality tests, and this is a narrow minded opinion because it's mine, but like every time I've done one, I've really tried to self-reflect on the information that came and like it's helped me be more self aware and more confident in like how I approach things. So with this exercise with authentic confidence. I'm a friend maker. There was another coworker who ended up being an inquisitor. And my God, did I just get so annoyed with her every time I had to work because like it was 20 freaking questions every time? So then like I learned through that process, she's inquisitive. She's got a lot of questions. I wasn't prepared when I was meeting with her. She so, in order to make it work, right, I needed to be more prepared. I started to make the change. We improved our working relationship. That's awesome story. speaker-0: Start. speaker-2: I mean, it r it really is. And I believe in it. And then there were other people like they, you know, you kind of go up and down the scale of like what it is, but like, you know, it also kind of taught me to lean into my superpower of empathy. Like it is like I scored off the charts in it. And like it was so like self reassuring that like that's not a problem that I have, it's a strength. And I need to lean into it. Putting myself in the shoes of other people in my career field is how I get to where I need to. Mm-hmm. It really is. 'Cause like it's all human or user experience. speaker-1: I was trying to find your disc assessment quickly but I couldn't 'cause I was gonna say it was reflected there too and I was gonna pull a few bullet points that of John, but John? Yeah. speaker-0: So what style likes clarity? speaker-1: man, you're putting me on the spot. A speaker-2: Corey knows. speaker-1: C that's right. Okay. speaker-0: a D style. 'Cause John's style was a D style and he also had a higher S. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: So that's where maybe you might, you know, he w he is gonna see speaker-1: I would o but I would expect him to have a higher eye because I wants to be around people and talking to them. speaker-0: Remember S is like people too. That's true. Okay. So speaker-2: You know what? I'll take this assessment. Keep going. Please and thank you. And her if for those of you that can see her shoes are super cool. speaker-0: Thank you, thank you. We're breaking in. speaker-1: Yeah, I even like thought about it before you came in. I was like, I should review my disc PowerPoint presentation because I know Corey's gonna ask me something. speaker-0: That's okay. So speaker-2: So what does this mean then for me? speaker-0: It just it so it means essentially that yes, y you really do enjoy people. My guess is even though you like to connect people, you're probably still not like out there as the light are you the life of the party kind of guy, like who's crazy and in the mosh pit? Or are you somebody who is more of a one on one, I wanna meet this person and connect them with this person? speaker-2: gosh. So I'm gonna go with the latter. But I do consider myself a hype guy. Okay. But like the one on one connection is is accurate. And and that was confirmed by my my former work husband, Brad Peck, that I worked with at Mercury. And he was like, 'Cause we 'cause I'm a photographer and like I like one on one sessions. Sure. I don't like more than one person in it. And he's like, dude, you're a one on one guy. Like you know when speaker-0: So sometimes when people like people, we think, okay, they have to be this high eye. But remember those higher eyes are in the mosh pit, talking to everybody on the planet, going a little more scattered. Do you find John to be scattered? My guess is probably not. So speaker-1: On some things, but yeah. speaker-2: I mean I'm definitely scattered on some things, but it goes back to time management. Mm-hmm. speaker-1: I think it also might be just like your attention, you hyper you're a hyperfocuser. Yeah. speaker-2: Yes. Big time. speaker-1: Yeah. So if you're if the activity that you are working on isn't part of what it you're hyperfocusing at the time, that's where you become scattered. Yes. Not necessarily that you are s scattered all the time. speaker-2: Correct. I agree with speaker-1: I think you probably have just have a hard time moving your focus to other things. speaker-2: I do, because it's like I'm fixated. Sure. Like I want a resolution. speaker-1: Yeah. Yeah. speaker-0: So that would be Yeah. close with that is also, you know, just more of that compliant personality. So I mean, again, those are again, the disc is our behavior of the how. Right. How we move in our pace and in our communication. But when we bring in motivators, you know, highly receptive. Of course he's a marketer. Right. He's off the charts with highly receptive, meaning very open minded. I'm going to guess you're probably not a very judgmental person towards others, especially if you have such a high empathy gift anyway. speaker-2: Lead it inspire always. speaker-1: Yeah, he's friends with horrible people. speaker-2: I mean speaker-1: No, I don't mean that literally, but you're you're willing to look over people's faults past people's faults a lot more than a lot of speaker-0: flip side with that, then you also need to be making aware that you're not being taken advantage of. So sometimes I see that in that yes, where it's so We're such a connector, we're such an empathetic person, we're so open minded to the troubles of others or their other of their situations that sometimes we get sucked into things that maybe really aren't serving us or are not beneficial for us. So sometimes when I see those in the assessments, I like to give someone a little note and just say, Hey, what did you do for yourself today? That was something that you advocated for you and you did for you versus somebody else. Or you got sucked into something and then at that night in bed you're laying there going like why the hell did I do that? You know, just kind of those types of things. And then sometimes we see it so extreme where those are the people that are a little bit more not only are they taken advantage of, they don't their identity starts to get lost in causes and in other things. And it's like, who are you? Like I think sometimes as humans we don't take pride in having our own thing. Like when I came in today and I said, I got distracted today. I was on the lake all day. That's what I did. Bam. You know, I don't have any guilt. Years ago I would have had guilt. I'm not ready. I'm I don't have great hair for these guys. And I who cares? I just kind of got off the water, quickly showered, threw something on and came. So like Being advocating for what you need in the moment. Today, I was by myself. I needed some alone time. I value that. That's a huge value of mine. On the water by myself. Nobody else was out yet. That was great. So what are we doing for ourselves, especially if you do enjoy people and you do enjoy the hype? Make sure you're taking time out for you too. speaker-2: Yeah, I never ask myself, what have I done for me today? Do you? speaker-1: occasionally. I've been trying to get better about it, especially with a kid coming. because my personal time's going to erode. But not erode. It's just gonna be taken up by other things. Yeah. So yeah, that's why between patients I'm usually working on personal projects because I can't business projects need my whole focus and I can't do that between patients. I've never been able to do it. So I have like hours set aside to do those things. So between The patience, I'm gonna sit down and play Mario Kart on the TV in my office or I'm going to gonna take time to edit my podcast. I started going back to martial arts, partly because I wanted I wanna make sure that my daughter is a world champion by the time she's fifteen. I love it. speaker-0: Watch her come out with ballerina papers and be like, I'm not doing that. speaker-1: she's she's gonna be a great kicker then. Like she'll be fine. I don't do it enough. I don't think I I don't think a lot of entrepreneurs, especially ones who work like dental is as a dentist, as an owner, it is an extremely demanding psychol field, physically and psychologically, because you are the CEO, the C O O the in some places your HR and you're the lead practitioner. And I remember like talking to John about this when we first started working on my brand and on my business. He's like, You can't do all these things and I remember looking like I think I told you this. I'm like, This is how everybody does this. Yes, that's true. speaker-2: And I was like, no. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Majority. speaker-2: No, but I mean like, but there's a better way. Right? And I mean, and the basis of our conversations like that were like, what do you want? Do you want to be the best dentist or do you want to be the best marketer and operations person and this and that? You know? And he's like, Well, I want to be the best dentist. It's like, so what are you doing about it? speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: Right. And it's it is hard because like that, that what are you doing about it? It's a different version of, you know, but like I got that from my brother, man. Like he's he's a very strong leader and that is a fair question to ask yourself when like something's not getting done. What are you doing about it? speaker-1: I think like just to tie this kind of all back together, like we're like the anyone who's listening to this, like just not understanding what the point like why do we need a personality assessment to talk to people? It's not about speaker-2: You're right. Thanks for bringing it back. speaker-1: Yeah, you're good. it's about creating an environment where people can communicate back and forth without judgment and through understanding. Like without like unless you're working with maybe a narcissistic sociopath, they're not gonna use a disc assessment to like manipulate people. And it would be hard to do that anyway if the other person has your disc assessment. speaker-0: Yes. And remember it's just a tool, so it's really as open and honest that you are answering the questions. Yep. I've had people, you know, a lot of times there's always like one in every crowd, like, this isn't me. Well, are you real with yourself? Do you know? Like I did speaker-1: Yeah, it's a question. speaker-0: you actually answer the questions truthfully and honestly. I can remember looking at assessments and being like, I don't like that about myself because they're very honest. There's something that I thought didn't represent me for years and then I was like, No, it's It does represent me. That is true. When under stress I do behave that way. That's not something I'm proud of, but that's something now to be aware of. speaker-2: So so then like how did the personality assessment, whatever one you've done, right, how did it impact like your leadership style? speaker-0: So it helped me when I was adding employees to my team to kind of know what we needed. So it wasn't like I was looking for a type. I would say I really do prefer. I mean, at this point in my life, I kind of prefer a certain style. I like to hang out with a certain style. Work for me has to be a lot of fun. So I also was open-minded to hiring someone that maybe didn't fit that mold. But then also just being completely direct, being prepared, that that may be a little more be a little bit more challenging for me to communicate or out of expectations. Like I know if I'm gonna hire this personality style, I'm gonna have to be a more patient leader because I like things very fast paced. Like 1% of the population is like that. So that I am not the norm. So then it's like, okay, who can I who can I hire that's gonna tolerate me then too? And then What is realistic? I expect a project to be done in an hour, but is it really realistic to say that maybe it needs to be two days? So I think from a leadership perspective, it helps you kind of fine-tune where you want to be and who is on your team and how that looks. And your team should be diverse. Your team should not all be the same. And as you know too, Dr. Ellot, you have a you diverse team, although we do say in dentistry we have certain styles that seem to be attracted to dentistry. Yeah. Because they're people, people and they love to serve. Which is great. But we do need some business-minded people and we need some direct communicators and we need to have a throw a whole bunch of different styles in there. But as a leader, utilizing the assessments when we would more in team building was such a great way for our leaders to know this is what I'm going to expect out of this person. Because it's it's pretty clear and obvious. But it challenges me then as a leader or whoever the leader is. How can I grow in my communication with them? speaker-1: I've had a few people take the disc assessment or employees and like, I really don't think this is me. Like I have one employee who insists she's not a high eye. Sure. And I'm she's like, because this other assistant's a high eye and I'm not like her. Like, okay, but they're like the the there's four categories here and these categories have a hundred you know, a hundred different types of people within them. Sure. Like and they like it's kind of interesting watching the self-reflection because I think a lot of people, especially when you're young, you misunderstand yourself. You've got you're you're biased by the expectations of your family growing up, the culture that you grew up in. speaker-0: And what you were told you were. speaker-1: Right. Yeah. So when I come and say you're a high eye, you like to be around people, you get recharged through the social nature of interaction, and she goes, but I get overwhelmed by people sometimes and this happens and this happens. And I'm like, hey, there's also mental health. There's speaker-0: Yeah, for sure. speaker-1: also like there's different degrees of this. Like, hey, yeah. speaker-0: Intensity. speaker-1: I mean, for for me, I was like, I sat the employee down. I'm like, like you you're taking this like way too personally, first of all, like it's just a sheet of paper. speaker-0: Right. speaker-1: And but second of all, like think of all the times that you love interacting with specific patients. And the speaker-0: Well remember too, the high eye their first go to is generally optimism. Yeah. Is this an optimistic person? speaker-1: times, but then she also has times where she's not optimistic. And that's where I think there's always that mental health component that can speaker-0: For sure. And the other thing too that's interesting, this this conversation actually happened this morning. My daughter is nineteen and and speaker-1: And a figure skater. speaker-0: a figure skater. Yes. speaker-2: Cool. speaker-0: she is in her sophomore year of college, she goes back to school in a month, exactly a month to the day. Not that I was counting. Anyway, she's asked me this morning, because my daughter is very versed in the communication, right? And she says, Mom. I have ADD. So how does my assessment affect me having ADD? Because I'm she's on meds and whatever. And I was like, that's such a good question. But I don't I don't know. I said, I actually really don't know. Because she was asking me some things this morning about her assessment. And I think speaker-1: They're two different things. speaker-0: I I just didn't know how to answer her. Yeah. There is a mental health component, but then if you're answering the the questionnaire I don't I would think that you would still be the same person. Yeah. speaker-2: I'm gonna challenge that because of the impact the medication has on how you process information. speaker-1: But the assessment is so based on like your gut reaction. speaker-2: To a scenario and how you process it. speaker-1: Cas speaker-2: Because it's like in this scenario, would you, you know? So speaker-1: Some of the questions are like that, yeah. speaker-2: that's where it's like I speaker-0: It's interesting. It's a great question. speaker-2: know for me it is like, you know, I have anti anxiety med medication, and like it's definitely impacts my way of thinking because I feel like I'm more patient. I feel like I'm less to react. You know, like You know, instead of going to ten, it's like maybe it's two. speaker-0: That's a really good point. That's what that was what her point was, is I think I'm less reactionary when I'm taking my meds versus when I'm not, then I'm crazy and wild. And I'm like, yeah, that's a good point. speaker-2: Yeah, me and my the way that I process a n like a negative situation now is I feel like way different than I was doing five years ago. speaker-1: When we're using disk assessments, not necessarily disk assessments, but when we're trying to build a culture, what is like like if you had to like point at one thing and how many practices have you worked with, do you think, at this point? speaker-0: probably over five hundred. speaker-1: Okay. Well how you've got a big enough sample pool here to probably come up with one or two things that happens a lot. What's one or two things that people like really screw up when building a culture in their crack? Yeah, speaker-0: this is a great question. speaker-1: 'cause I have mine. I wanna hear yours. Please. speaker-2: Hawk. speaker-0: Yeah, so speaker-1: You know what? John's building a team right now. speaker-2: Yeah, no, this is what I'm speaker-0: Just across the field with dentistry. This is in any team, in my in my opinion. Yeah. So speaker-1: Disk assessments on sports teams. speaker-0: for sure. Yeah. The biggest component for me that I've seen in all the offices I've been in and working with other industries outside of dentistry, it's the same problem across the board. It starts with the leader and it starts with how clear the leader is with the expectations. That's where it all stems from. speaker-1: Yeah, that was gonna be my pretty close to my answer because there are times where I think I do a pretty good job of putting my expectations out there. And I have like the optimism from the D personality style and always thinking the best of people and overestimating maybe what they can do and can't do and not I like being able to like I like I when I look at disc assessments, I s usually skip disc and go right to driving forces. 'Cause to me that's the more valuable thing. Yeah. So like understanding what drives that person, that's more valuable to me. So that but I expect people to to like do their utmost best, and when they don't, I feel like this huge amount of letdown and anger. Like that comes out really quick. But the other thing is that I for me I'm too stubborn to let go of a bad decision sometimes. Where I'm I need to just like acknowledge, hey, this was not the right hire. Hey, this wasn't the right thing to do. speaker-0: It's it really does start with the leader. That leader determines the culture of what is tolerated and what is expected and how things are going to be. And it can't be The toughest thing is in leadership is being consistent. Yes. Is being consistent. Because there are gonna be people that you like better than others. That's just reality. Yes. But you cannot favor them. You have to treat everybody on a l level playing field. You have to meet everybody's needs. That's why leadership is not for wimpies. Yes. It's really It's tough. It's really tough. speaker-1: It's so hard. If we run into this every once in a while because I have a pretty diverse team there's a handful of them that like I just vibe with better. And like I have to catch myself sometimes, like, hey, am I giving this group of people too much attention? And it's not on purpose. Like like it's I I always say like I just kind of go through a like a round robin style of like like certain people are getting more attention or Certain people are getting more speaker-0: people want that attention too. And I also have to remote that. Some people want to do their job and go home. speaker-1: They don't want praises and I'm like, I love praises. Like I always want to be told I'm but I'll be bashing like don't say it. speaker-2: My my brother and I, we talk about this a lot. We both have, you know, now the corporate jobs. I'm back in it. But like so we came up with this like be the Mike Holmgren. So if you're familiar, right? Like Mike Holmgren was, you know, very successful head coach of the Green Bay Packers, then turned general manager at for the Seahawks and the coach, but he also coached other coaches that went on to be head coaches and win Super Bowls, right? So like his leadership, right? So like between he and I with like Green Bay Packers and whatever, right? Like there's this thing. So, you know, leadership is something that it's a very important thing. And that's why I did say right off the bat, like, be direct and be clear, right? Be clear with your intentions. But you also have to coach and you have to guide and you have to meet people where they are. And I'm a big believer in meeting people where they are and I'm very open about it with people and I have like this scale. It's like called the dish the decision making scale. So like if if you can visualize like just a simple like line chart, a ninety degree, it starts with I decide at the very bottom and it works its way this way. It's like I decide, we discuss, I decide, we discuss, we decide. We discuss, you decide, then I'm here to support you. Okay. So like there are people that I've identified with like how I need to lead and coach them. So like I have people where it's like, I'm here to support you. And that's great. And those are the those are your right hand people. Right? They get it done. They know what's up. But then there is the, you know, we discuss, you decide to give them that experience. And the we discuss, we decide is like you're close, but we still gotta talk this out. Right, right. You know, and then you know, we discuss, I decide, and I decide is just you're just not ready. And that's okay. And like I explain that. speaker-1: Is that how you handle conflict? speaker-2: that's how I handle like how the decision making goes with me. speaker-1: What's like I guess is the biggest like mistake that leaders make when they're dealing with conflict within their practice is having like having favorites or or siding with someone who's just been there the longest. So speaker-2: It's not gonna help. speaker-0: Avoiding, right? It's avoiding the conflict. They don't they won't address it. Or they think that the team will work it out. And then that's where that maybe favoritism comes into where, well, we're used to this person always being this way, or this person is the leader of all the girls or all the team or whatever they however they want to phrase it, and they'll just figure it out. And again, not being involved but completely avoiding, that's the biggest mistake. I think. speaker-1: I think early on I would get involved too much. Like sometimes people just wanted to complain about something and I jumped right into fix it mode. Mm-hmm. I think that like it ended up just making everyone more confused because we'd be changing things so often to to alleviate one person's like speaker-0: So what it what what are some of the phrases that we say though? Like does this need to be said by me right now? Mm-hmm. Does this need to be said to someone else right now? You know, and kind of teaching the team that process too. Like, again, it's emotional regulation. Do I need to start something that's not worth starting? Is this something that needs to be brought to my leader's opinion, you know, his attention or her attention? Or can I deal with this one on one with someone else? And I think for me it even now, like what saves me is does this need to be said? Mm-hmm. Does it need to be said by me? And does it need to be said right now? And if you speaker-1: Now is a big part. Right. speaker-0: and that's the problem when you're working with people who are emotionally unregulated. Whether they're younger or just unregulated, and it's like you've just changed the trajectory of the day by causing a big stir, and you gotta s that's where again, avoiding it is gonna be the biggest mistake. You gotta squelch it right away. And then you know, I'm so firm that I think those are people that need to be written up. I just I do. You don't you speaker-2: F speaker-0: don't create chaos in my culture, yes, or I'm gonna write you up. This is what chaos in the culture looks like. speaker-1: And that's another good point is like you and I both look at r like quote unquote writing somebody up as a part of learning and a part of building a culture. Yeah. But it has such a negative connotation about it that people freak out sometimes. That's a good point. speaker-0: Maybe they need to freak out. Maybe they do. And this is where I'm gonna show you that I'm five I think we're a little soft. Yeah. Let's stop being a little soft. Own up. Yeah. I mean, I have three kids under my roof, twenty five to almost twenty. My first question is, what part did you play in this? When they're complaining about their work schedule or about this or that. I'm like, I don't you need to own up. speaker-1: And people who don't become toxic really quick. speaker-0: They do and then they become adults in your workforce that suck. speaker-2: I've I've I've honestly learned that like, you know, you gotta own it. You gotta you know, like you said it before, like I made the bad decision and I'm paraphrasing, but like you didn't own it. Right? I own my decisions, right? And I try to be calculated in what I do, but there are times where it's like the humility of owning it are the better optics than like continuing to look like an ass. Like that's how I feel. I'd rather just come out and be like that was the worst decision. I won't do that again. speaker-1: I yeah, that was something I struggled with. Like we like I hired a couple of different people over the last three years that ended up being toxic for my culture. And I'm not talking about any specific person. There's been a couple. I looked for excuses to keep people rather than just be like, Hey, this is just not the right fit. and then also like but we there are people who have toxic traits that can be coached out of them too. speaker-0: If they desire that for sure. Because you can train skills. We can't train attitude. That's true. That's somebody's desire to come in and like I mean, going back to when I was 19 years old and introduced to being a dental assistant, I just wanted to please that dentist so much because I was just so thrilled. He was training me on the job and showing me how to be a dental assistant. I was so excited. Like my attitude was great. My skills stunk because I didn't know what I was doing. But like my attitude was like, I'm here, I'm on time, I'm ready to work. Like, what can I do to be this? great team player, this is awesome. And you know, he he was great. I always attribute I think a lot of my work ethic to that experience as as a nineteen year old. Just it was so great. I don't know. speaker-1: I love it. Well, we're we're kind of coming up on the hour mark here. I think we could keep talking for for a long time. speaker-2: I know I could. speaker-1: Yeah. But we always try to I like find a fun positive note. Okay, so the fact that you've worked with five hundred practices, you have to have a couple of funny stories or funny interactions. speaker-2: 'Cause you're crescendo boy. speaker-1: Yeah. What was like like th just think about n maybe towards the end, like just a really fun environment that you were working with, or like just someone that you worked with that you'll never forget. speaker-0: fun story would be of course it's a Wisconsin office because Wisconsin offices were the best for sure. I loved it. It was speaker-1: Mm-hmm. speaker-0: very hospitable. speaker-2: Nice exactly. Wisconsin people are nice people. speaker-1: I'll just buy you more food. speaker-2: Wasteful. speaker-0: Yes, no. I think one of the I think it's really fun too when the whole team is excited you're there and they all work together and they believe because they know that their leader has brought them in for their best. Those are fun. and again, Wisconsin offices were almost always really, really awesome. And they would include us with their fun activities and things like that. That was something that was always really fun. but being in hundreds of offices, I have a lot of weird stories that I won't take our time on, but I can certainly write in a book some speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: I mean wish speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-2: you knew me better because I feel like I'm a little kooky. speaker-0: Well maybe you need to come over to the dental side. No? No. speaker-1: yeah. speaker-2: Yeah. speaker-1: I even told John when we he's like, You should do a podcast, and we were going back and forth. I'm like, dude, I in the end I didn't want to do one just about dentistry because dentists are either really weird, really boring, or somewhere in between. Like like I wanted to do something that appealed to a bunch of different people, entrepreneurs, people who just wanted some entertainment, and that and and that's kind of what we're doing. And so I really appreciate you coming on speaker-2: Absolutely. This has been great. speaker-1: Yes. thank you. So this has been another episode of the Deathbook for Decay podcast. Thank you, Corey, Jamison Cool, for coming on. Did I say is Cool or Keel? Keel. speaker-2: I even knew that. speaker-0: Thank you. speaker-1: I just always call you Corey Jameson. speaker-0: I go by that. CJ? Yeah, CJ sometimes people call me. I when I got married, I told my husband, I said, I'm gonna have to hyphenate because I'm known as Corey Jameson. Yeah. And he was like, That's all right, you want me to hyphenate too? And I'd be super weird. speaker-2: my gosh. That is hilarious. speaker-1: Anyway, thank you for coming on. Yes, thank you. Thank you. Yeah. speaker-2: Great having you. speaker-1: social speaker-2: So speaker-1: Do you have a do you do any social media? No, you're out? speaker-2: Well if you wanna get in touch with her, don't ask. She's on Savannah. speaker-1: Yes. Excellent. speaker-0: Until November first. speaker-1: All right. Thank you everyone. Have a great day.