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209.From the Sidelines to Success: How Inner Excellence Can Transform Your Workplace · The Kathie Owen Perspective Podcast

• 0:00
  Hello.
• 0:00
  Hello and welcome today.
• 0:02
  We are going to talk about a new book that I just found.
• 0:07
  It's called inner excellence.
• 0:10
  This book was found randomly because as I was watching professional football over the weekend, I saw that the camera turned to AIJ brown and he was actually reading this book on the sidelines and it caused quite a stir.
• 0:28
  In fact, it went viral on Twitter and.
• 0:33
  That's how I found it.
• 0:34
  I was like, well, this is so cool because.
• 0:38
  This book is all about.
• 0:40
  Mental performance and building a team and an individual with inner excellence because that's where it comes from.
• 0:50
  It comes from here.
• 0:52
  Not here.
• 0:54
  So today I'm going to talk about some mindset shifts that he discusses at the very beginning of the book.
• 1:01
  I just started reading this book.
• 1:03
  And a lot of what they're talking about is what I coach in sports psychology in building healthy cultures.
• 1:11
  And I can't wait to dive into this because some of these topics I've already learned about, and that's what I'm going to touch on.
• 1:19
  You're listening to Kathie's coaching podcast.
• 1:21
  I'm your host, Kathie Owen, if you're new here.
• 1:24
  Yes.
• 1:25
  My name is Kathy Owen and.
• 1:28
  I am a corporate wellness consultant and coach, I have been a personal trainer for 20 plus years, and also a life coach.
• 1:37
  So today we're talking about.
• 1:40
  Inner excellence and how actually the mindset that we need to succeed in life in general.
• 1:49
  And let me add this to succeed easily.
• 1:53
  Ready?
• 1:54
  Let's get into it.
• 1:55
  So inside the very beginning of this book, and I'm going to read it to you.
• 2:00
  He has some prepositions that will help you form the basis of the mindset of inner excellent.
• 2:07
  Oh my God.
• 2:08
  These are so good.
• 2:10
  So I'm gonna read them to you.
• 2:11
  And then from there, we're going to discuss it a little bit.
• 2:15
  Number one.
• 2:16
  Every circumstance and every person you encounter is here to teach you and help you.
• 2:22
  And it's all working for your good.
• 2:26
  You were created for glory, infinite, inherent worth.
• 2:31
  The life you've been given is meant to develop your character and prepare you for glory.
• 2:38
  Oh, wow.
• 2:39
  Every person you meet is actually here to teach you something.
• 2:44
  This is true.
• 2:46
  I can tell you.
• 2:47
  I'm as old as the Superbowl I've been around this earth for a long time.
• 2:51
  And so I really believe in this.
• 2:55
  And one thing he says right here, that is the important shift to listen to.
• 3:01
  It's all working for your good.
• 3:04
  It's all working for your good, when you have this mindset shift.
• 3:09
  Holy it just works out.
• 3:13
  Everything works to your advantage.
• 3:15
  And here are two books that I have learned this from in previous years, A Course in Miracles definitely points to this.
• 3:24
  And almost every lesson that it has.
• 3:27
  And Reality Transurfing, how everything is working to your favor.
• 3:32
  Even the traffic jam that you just got stuck in, or that you're stuck in while you're listening to this.
• 3:39
  Because it's working to your advantage and it's here to teach you something.
• 3:44
  I really liked this mindset and it will help you find advantage in everything.
• 3:51
  Let's get to the next point.
• 3:52
  There's 10 of them.
• 3:54
  We got to go over 10 of them.
• 3:56
  So here is the next point.
• 3:57
  Your life is a reflection of your beliefs.
• 4:01
  The foundation for extraordinary performance, joy and confidence, and the primary skill to learn.
• 4:08
  Is how to believe.
• 4:11
  Beliefs are the control panel of your life.
• 4:15
  A subconscious thermostat, keeping your life in line with your comfort levels to improve performance and your life in a consistent, powerful way.
• 4:26
  You must change your beliefs about who you are and what is possible.
• 4:33
  I recently did an episode with my manifestation coach, Cintia and I have to tell you that some of her work has given me.
• 4:44
  I profound shift in my beliefs in myself.
• 4:48
  And I found that I was actually.
• 4:51
  Beating myself up for stuff.
• 4:54
  I didn't even realize I was doing that, but her work led me to realize my mind was definitely thinking in the wrong direction and my beliefs were.
• 5:06
  Not helpful.
• 5:08
  For example.
• 5:10
  Let's say I was thinking, ah, I just had a conversation with somebody and I was beating myself up about it.
• 5:16
  I'm like, why did I say that?
• 5:17
  Why did I do this?
• 5:18
  This is not helpful.
• 5:21
  And this is a limiting belief.
• 5:24
  And beliefs need to be transmuted.
• 5:26
  We have to think of them in another way.
• 5:29
  And we have, they are our thermostat of our subconscious mind.
• 5:33
  Your subconscious mind takes everything literally.
• 5:36
  So when you cut yourself down, your subconscious mind goes, okay, that's your reality.
• 5:42
  That's what you're going to get.
• 5:44
  And when you start to empower yourself with empowering beliefs, beliefs of gratitude.
• 5:50
  Beliefs like the one we just talked about finding advantage in everything.
• 5:55
  Holy crap.
• 5:57
  Everything shifts.
• 5:58
  So does your reality.
• 6:01
  And that's what we're talking about here.
• 6:03
  Let's go to number three.
• 6:04
  Oh, this one.
• 6:07
  Self-centeredness is the root cause of fear.
• 6:12
  Going to read that again because that's powerful.
• 6:14
  Self-centeredness is the root cause of fear.
• 6:18
  It leads to, self-consciousness concerned about what others think of us.
• 6:24
  Over analysis.
• 6:26
  And ultimately self-rejection our greatest obstacle is getting in our own way through arrogance.
• 6:33
  Or self-rejection.
• 6:35
  Both of which come from self-centeredness.
• 6:39
  Self-centeredness is the root of fear.
• 6:42
  So when we think that everything is about us, we are going to come from the root of fear.
• 6:49
  Think of a root running through the ground.
• 6:52
  If that is one thing we need to get out, we need to get it out.
• 6:57
  Like I just mentioned about in.
• 7:00
  Lesson number two, I was talking bad to myself in my mind.
• 7:05
  My inner self-talk was talking bad about myself.
• 7:09
  That's self centeredness, how can I be bad when I come from the divine?
• 7:15
  Like my coach always teaches our mentor, Joseph Rodriguez.
• 7:20
  He always says we are love peace, bliss, happiness, and fulfillment.
• 7:26
  And when we really realized that we come from a place that is not so self-centered, it's not all about us.
• 7:33
  Every situation is not all about us.
• 7:36
  I want to go back to the fact that a professional athlete was actually reading this.
• 7:42
  Book during a football game.
• 7:45
  During a football game.
• 7:48
  I professional football game.
• 7:50
  I know I'm saying that a lot, and this is not even my team, my team.
• 7:56
  Is in the Houston area, always.
• 7:59
  That's where I fell in love with sports.
• 8:01
  But I geek out on sports psychology.
• 8:06
  What makes that athlete perform so well?
• 8:08
  What makes that athlete.
• 8:10
  Performed like he is doing.
• 8:12
  What he was doing was he was reading highlights from this book.
• 8:17
  Go Google it.
• 8:18
  AJ Brown of the Philadelphia Eagles, reading a book during a game.
• 8:23
  This book started trending on Google as soon as he did that, because he was reading from this book of excellence.
• 8:32
  It's not all about him.
• 8:33
  All right, let's go to point number four.
• 8:37
  We all have the same deep needs and desires.
• 8:41
  Every human heart desperately wants to be loved and accepted.
• 8:46
  Most of what we do is done in order to meet this need.
• 8:51
  Our deepest need is for unconditional love.
• 8:54
  And our greatest desire is to be fully known and fully loved.
• 8:59
  Yes, this is true, but I'm going to go back to what my mentor says.
• 9:03
  We are already love peace, bliss, happiness, and fulfillment.
• 9:08
  And when we see it that way, it shifts everything.
• 9:12
  You don't desperately need it.
• 9:14
  It just comes.
• 9:15
  And when you become aware of what you're talking to yourself about and thinking about.
• 9:21
  You start to go, oh, wait a minute.
• 9:23
  That's a limiting belief.
• 9:25
  I cannot be the person who.
• 9:28
  Has a bad conversation because it's not about me.
• 9:31
  Number one.
• 9:32
  And number two.
• 9:34
  I'm coming from a different place.
• 9:36
  It's coming from a place of flow.
• 9:39
  And no shame and condemnation.
• 9:41
  When you do feel a bad thought about yourself, but bring it to light.
• 9:45
  Get that root pulled out.
• 9:48
  And oh, Huh.
• 9:50
  Everything shifts you watch.
• 9:53
  Number five.
• 9:54
  Everyone does the best they can with what they have in their hearts.
• 10:00
  In their hearts.
• 10:02
  That is according to their background, their understandings, their beliefs, their fears, their wounds, and their voids.
• 10:12
  Whenever someone, including yourself, acts in a way that is painful or hurtful, it is because they lack resources such as love.
• 10:23
  Joy.
• 10:24
  and peace.
• 10:26
  Looking through a self-centered lens of fear and or pain.
• 10:33
  That relates to the, the one right before it, but we're all doing the best we can.
• 10:40
  With what we have and what we know.
• 10:42
  This makes it so easy to forgive others for what they're doing that may appear to be about you.
• 10:49
  But it's not okay.
• 10:50
  We remember that.
• 10:52
  But if something's going on out there, it's not about you.
• 10:57
  But it's also coming from a place of their understanding.
• 11:01
  Take, for example, when you get cut off in traffic, are you going to get mad at that person?
• 11:05
  Did they do it to you on purpose?
• 11:08
  No.
• 11:09
  They are doing the best they can with what they have.
• 11:12
  Maybe they don't understand traffic etiquette.
• 11:14
  That's what I always say to myself here in the Houston area.
• 11:18
  Sorry, rusty.
• 11:19
  Rusty just had to give his input.
• 11:21
  But when we understand that everyone's doing the best they can with what they have or what they're dealing with.
• 11:28
  It makes you have a little bit more empathy and a little bit more understanding.
• 11:33
  Number six, the map is not the territory.
• 11:37
  The world you see and interact with is not reality.
• 11:41
  I talk about this in Reality Transurfing, by the way.
• 11:43
  It's the one your mind created.
• 11:47
  Based on the way you've interpreted and processed the events in your life so far..
• 11:54
  There is a picture of a pipe it's at the beginning of the chapter..
• 11:59
  Like my grandpa used to smoke and he says this right here.
• 12:02
  He said, the pipe you saw at the beginning of these presuppositions is not actually a pipe.
• 12:09
  It's a picture of a pipe.
• 12:11
  That may seem like a silly distinction, but actually it's quite important.
• 12:16
  Here's the thing.
• 12:18
  Your reality is what you imagine it to be.
• 12:21
  You can imagine it to be lovely and great and beneficial.
• 12:25
  For example, look outside, it's kind of rainy today.
• 12:28
  It's kind of dreary.
• 12:29
  Most people will be like, oh, this is Drury day.
• 12:31
  It's terrible weather, blah, blah, blah.
• 12:34
  That's their reality.
• 12:36
  But when you shift your reality to wait, you want to envision it.
• 12:41
  It's a pretty day.
• 12:42
  It's a beautiful day.
• 12:44
  The way you picture your reality and the way you picture your reality in your mind.
• 12:50
  Is what changes everything.
• 12:54
  Number seven.
• 12:55
  You are not your mind.
• 12:58
  Your mind is a part of you.
• 13:00
  That you need to train.
• 13:02
  You can learn to direct and control your thoughts, just like you learn to control your body.
• 13:08
  The greatest freedom you have is where to place your thoughts.
• 13:12
  As you realize that you are not your mind.
• 13:16
  You will be less attached to the useless, negative thoughts that come every day and direct your mind towards empowering ones.
• 13:27
  You are not your mind.
• 13:30
  This is taught in meditation.
• 13:32
  You are not your thoughts.
• 13:34
  You are not your mind.
• 13:36
  But you can control that.
• 13:38
  And when you control that to stop letting that negativity bias takeover, you will find your world takes care of you and everything works to your advantage.
• 13:48
  Like we talked to number one.
• 13:50
  But you will also find that.
• 13:53
  Things start to appear that more and appearing before in your reality.
• 13:59
  So you are not your mind.
• 14:02
  You control your mind.
• 14:05
  Number eight.
• 14:06
  I love this one, by the way.
• 14:08
  The problem is not the problem.
• 14:11
  The problem is the way you are thinking about it.
• 14:15
  You're not happy or sad because of your circumstances, but rather because of what you think about your circumstances, how you feel originates almost entirely from what you think the state you enter caused by how you think about a problem is the real problem.
• 14:32
  So the problem is not the problem.
• 14:35
  The problem is the way you are thinking about it.
• 14:38
  Go back to the quote from Shakespeare.
• 14:40
  In Hamlet.
• 14:42
  Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
• 14:47
  Okay.
• 14:49
  I Always try to think this way.
• 14:52
  When I started realizing I was thinking bad thoughts about myself and my state, it was affecting my state.
• 15:02
  And then when I shifted that I started to feel more gratitude, more, love, more peace, more bliss, more happiness.
• 15:12
  Because it was the way I was thinking about the problem.
• 15:17
  I thought it was a problem, but really, and truly it wasn't a problem.
• 15:21
  It was just a lesson.
• 15:23
  Let's go to the next one.
• 15:24
  There is no failure, only feedback.
• 15:30
  You hear that?
• 15:31
  That is a sigh going, oh, that wasn't a failure.
• 15:35
  What just happened?
• 15:36
  It is just feedback yesterday.
• 15:39
  I witnessed an accident.
• 15:41
  It wasn't a major accident was actually a guy turning.
• 15:45
  To, to the right from the middle lane and he turned right, and this car hit him.
• 15:52
  That's feedback right there.
• 15:53
  Something was going on inside his mind that he was not controlling.
• 15:58
  Like we just talked about where he made the mistake or the feedback.
• 16:03
  Of.
• 16:05
  Turning from the wrong lane.
• 16:08
  And so everything is just feedback.
• 16:10
  It's not a failure.
• 16:12
  I like that.
• 16:14
  And that mindset shift will take you a long way.
• 16:17
  And number 10.
• 16:19
  The person with the most control of their inner world has the most power.
• 16:24
  Mastery of the ego is the great challenge and the greatest opponent.
• 16:30
  In every competition.
• 16:32
  Selflessness complete surrender of the attachments, concerns and fears of the self is the central component to extra ordinary performance and cornerstone to creating beliefs that lead to absolute fullness of life.
• 16:49
  The person with the most control of their inner world has the most power.
• 16:55
  All right.
• 16:56
  This is where the athlete could really benefit from learning this.
• 17:01
  Final mindset concept and the mastery of the ego is the greatest challenge and greatest opponent.
• 17:10
  Mastering the ego and trying to be on the best athlete.
• 17:14
  I talked about this in my episode with Jim Harbaugh.
• 17:18
  So Jim Harbaugh is known for creating a great team culture.
• 17:23
  And I love how he does this and what he does and how he instills this great culture.
• 17:28
  He is known for this.
• 17:30
  And I did a video on it because that applies to corporate wellness.
• 17:34
  When you have a great culture, you're going to have a great team regardless.
• 17:38
  And he saw this right there.
• 17:41
  Your competition.
• 17:43
  Could be the other team.
• 17:45
  The really, and truly, like it says right here, your competition is your ego.
• 17:50
  When you put your ego where belongs.
• 17:53
  In that box.
• 17:55
  And tell it to be quiet and tell it to that.
• 17:59
  My mind is in control, not the opponent.
• 18:02
  The ego happens to be the opponent, not the other one, because when you put that ego in the box, you're able to face the other team, which isn't really your opponent.
• 18:15
  With a humble mindset and realize, um, my power is coming from here instead of from here.
• 18:25
  Or from my ego.
• 18:27
  Um, yeah.
• 18:29
  Go back to Jim Harbaugh.
• 18:30
  What he would do was he would treat the diva athlete.
• 18:33
  And the rookie the exact same, they would work out together.
• 18:37
  What ended up happening is the culture came together.
• 18:41
  He saw this power of the ego.
• 18:45
  And the non ego.
• 18:47
  And you bring them together.
• 18:49
  They teach each other something.
• 18:52
  And those build a great culture.
• 18:55
  So your ego is your greatest opponent, not the other team.
• 19:01
  And I want to go to one real clear point here in the NFL.
• 19:08
  There are 32 teams.
• 19:11
  Only one of those teams is going to win the super bowl.
• 19:16
  That does that mean that there are 31 losers?
• 19:20
  Absolutely not.
• 19:21
  And then if you think about the teams and the players.
• 19:25
  There is all this ego going on.
• 19:28
  If you're just going, oh, I'm the best team in the world.
• 19:31
  Did.
• 19:32
  Okay.
• 19:33
  You won the super bowl.
• 19:34
  Do you remember who won the 2022 Superbowl.
• 19:40
  Probably if that's your team, but most likely you don't.
• 19:45
  And I always go back to this point because that is ego.
• 19:51
  And that's your greatest opponent.
• 19:53
  We're as just this past weekend.
• 19:56
  My favorite team, the Houston Texans, surprisingly beat Jim Harbaugh's team, the chargers.
• 20:04
  And I liked Jim Harbaugh as a coach.
• 20:08
  But does it mean that my team is the best or whatever it just means they won on that day?
• 20:15
  If you're going all my team's the best.
• 20:17
  That's your ego.
• 20:18
  And let's go to Reality Transurfing, which touches on this concept.
• 20:23
  And that is the pendulum.
• 20:25
  And the pendulum here in this discussion is your ego.
• 20:29
  And it only wants your energy.
• 20:31
  So if you can sit back and observe it in process and observe this.
• 20:37
  31 teams are losers that thought is absolutely crazy because all of those athletes that are on those teams, they worked hard to get there.
• 20:47
  They did excellent performance over the year.
• 20:49
  Maybe they got injured in the game and that's not about ego.
• 20:53
  That is about heart.
• 20:56
  That is about this mental mindset.
• 20:59
  This.
• 21:00
  Inner excellent that this author talks about.
• 21:04
  And I love that this book came on my radar.
• 21:07
  You know, I geek out about sports psychology.
• 21:10
  So if anything comes up that has any kind of concept like that.
• 21:14
  When I saw that on Twitter, I was like, oh my God, that's so cute.
• 21:18
  An athlete who's in his twenties, early thirties is reading a physical book during the game that blew my mind.
• 21:28
  That caught my attention because first of all, have an avid reader, but second of all, for him to be reading a book, During a game.
• 21:37
  And the announcer was talking about him like, oh, he must feel bad because he didn't do good.
• 21:42
  Or I've seen people eating hot dogs during a game, but I have not seen any athlete reading book.
• 21:48
  Well, maybe there's a reason.
• 21:52
  Because this book will shift your mindset.
• 21:55
  And all of these things.
• 21:58
  I've learned over the years and I've learned through Reality Transurfing through the book, A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle through my mentors, like Joseph Rodriguez.
• 22:09
  They're all pointing to the same thing.
• 22:11
  They're all pointing to the same thing.
• 22:13
  And I can't tell you enough that to find true happiness.
• 22:19
  Peace bliss fulfillment.
• 22:22
  An excellence in your life.
• 22:25
  It does take inner excellence and that inner excellence can only come from you and the way you control your mind and the way you view your reality.
• 22:39
  And you don't like your reality.
• 22:41
  Then change your view of it.
• 22:44
  All right.
• 22:45
  That's my episode for today.
• 22:46
  I trust that you found it helpful.
• 22:48
  If you know somebody who could benefit from this, please share it with them.
• 22:52
  And until next time.
• 22:53
  I will see you next time.
• 22:55
  Peace out and Namaste.
• 22:58
  Bing!