Latest / Narcisist Psychology / He Came for the Flowers: How a Grief Visitor Stole Her Life
Transcript
- 0:03Speaker 1: On the morning of October tenth, two thousand seventeen, a
- 0:07Speaker 1: surveyor named Terry Boyd was walking a vacant parcel behind
- 0:11Speaker 1: Fenwick Road when he found a pair of tortoise shell
- 0:13Speaker 1: reading glasses lying open in the grass, lens up impossibly clean.
- 0:18Speaker 1: They belonged to a woman whose obituary had already run
- 0:21Speaker 1: in the local paper, a woman who, according to that obituary,
- 0:25Speaker 1: had been dead for more than two weeks. The glasses
- 0:29Speaker 1: should not have been there, neither should the obituary, because
- 0:33Speaker 1: when investigators later pulled the records, there was no death
- 0:37Speaker 1: certificate on file for any date in September of two
- 0:40Speaker 1: thousand seventeen. That single contradiction, a clean pair of glasses
- 0:44Speaker 1: in an empty field, a death announced before it was documented,
- 0:48Speaker 1: became the crack that split the case open. What investigators
- 0:52Speaker 1: found inside changed how they understood everything that had happened
- 0:56Speaker 1: over the preceding two years. Not a sudden tragedy, a slow,
- 1:01Speaker 1: methodical dismantling of one woman's entire world. Constant Sawyer every
- 1:07Speaker 1: one called her. Connie was fifty two years old in
- 1:11Speaker 1: the spring of two thousand fifteen, when her husband Paul
- 1:14Speaker 1: died of a cardiac event, sudden and without warning. They
- 1:18Speaker 1: had lived for years on Calloway Street in Delworth, a
- 1:22Speaker 1: small city in Harwick County. Paul's death was the kind
- 1:26Speaker 1: that leaves no time to prepare. One morning, he was there,
- 1:30Speaker 1: by afternoon he was not. Connie had worked for decades
- 1:34Speaker 1: as an insurance claims processor, methodical, detail oriented, the kind
- 1:38Speaker 1: of person who kept records and returned calls the same
- 1:42Speaker 1: day she received them. She had recently retired the plan
- 1:46Speaker 1: hers and Paul's had been more time at home a garden.
- 1:51Speaker 1: After Paul died, Connie bought a ranch style house on
- 1:55Speaker 1: Fenwick Road. She started preparing the soil. Her daughter, Melissa,
- 1:59Speaker 1: lived in Portland, Oregon. They spoke every Thursday, not most Thursdays,
- 2:05Speaker 1: every Thursday, without exception. Melissa would later tell investigators that
- 2:10Speaker 1: she could not recall a single week in recent memory
- 2:14Speaker 1: when her mother had missed that call. Not for illness,
- 2:17Speaker 1: not for travel, not for anything. Connie's closest friend was
- 2:22Speaker 1: Janet Pugh, who had known her for years and remained
- 2:25Speaker 1: one of the fixed points of her daily life. And
- 2:28Speaker 1: then there was the food shelf. Every Wednesday morning for
- 2:31Speaker 1: seven years, Connie Sawyer showed up to volunteer at the
- 2:35Speaker 1: Dalworth Food Shelf. Dug Fitch, the coordinator, would later describe
- 2:40Speaker 1: her attendant's record as perfect, not nearly perfect, perfect seven years,
- 2:47Speaker 1: zero absences. She sordied donations, she knew the regulars by name.
- 2:53Speaker 1: She stayed until the work was done. It was the
- 2:56Speaker 1: kind of consistency that goes unnoticed until it stops. That
- 3:00Speaker 1: is the woman Gordon Hayes found in a death notice.
- 3:03Speaker 1: Approximately six weeks after Paul Sawyer died, a man appeared
- 3:07Speaker 1: at Connie's door on Calloway Street. He wore a lanyard
- 3:11Speaker 1: from an organization called Millbridge Comfort Care and he carried
- 3:15Speaker 1: a sympathy card. He introduced himself as a grief support facilitator.
- 3:20Speaker 1: He said he was there to help. What Connie did
- 3:22Speaker 1: not know. What she had no reason to suspect, was
- 3:26Speaker 1: that Paul had never been a Millbridge patient. The organization
- 3:30Speaker 1: had no record of the Sawyer family and had not
- 3:33Speaker 1: sent anyone to that address. Hayes held a certificate from
- 3:36Speaker 1: an online grief facilitation program. He was contracted part time
- 3:41Speaker 1: with Millbridge for intake and referrals only. He had no
- 3:45Speaker 1: clinical license. He had no authority to conduct outreach of
- 3:49Speaker 1: any kind, cold or otherwise. The director of Millbridge Comfort Care,
- 3:54Speaker 1: Anne Quill, would later confirm that the organization was entirely
- 3:58Speaker 1: unaware of his visits. Hayes had found Connie's name and
- 4:01Speaker 1: address in the death notice Paul's family had published in
- 4:05Speaker 1: the Delworth Food He stood at her door six weeks
- 4:09Speaker 1: after the worst loss of her life and told her
- 4:11Speaker 1: he was there to help, and Connie, who was grieving
- 4:15Speaker 1: and alone and trying to build something new on Fenwick Road,
- 4:19Speaker 1: let him in. What happened in the months that followed
- 4:22Speaker 1: did not look like danger. It looked from the outside
- 4:26Speaker 1: like recovery. But underneath that surface, something was being taken apart,
- 4:31Speaker 1: piece by piece, in exactly the order you would need
- 4:35Speaker 1: to dismantle it if you never wanted anyone to notice
- 4:38Speaker 1: until it was too late. Three months after that first visit,
- 4:42Speaker 1: Hayes was driving Connie to her appointments. Six months after that,
- 4:47Speaker 1: Connie introduced him to Janet Pugh. A year after he
- 4:51Speaker 1: appeared at her door, he had moved into the Fenwick
- 4:54Speaker 1: Road house, and Connie had not yet told Melissa that
- 4:57Speaker 1: sequence matters not because of its pace, but because of
- 5:01Speaker 1: its direction. Every step moved Hayes closer to the center
- 5:05Speaker 1: of Connie's life, and every step moved everyone else. Melissa
- 5:10Speaker 1: Janet Doug Fitch at the food shelf one degree further
- 5:14Speaker 1: from the inside. By autumn of two thy sixteen, Hayes
- 5:18Speaker 1: had been added to Connie's joint savings account. By June
- 5:22Speaker 1: of twenty seventeen, he had made three withdrawals from that account,
- 5:27Speaker 1: totaling more than forty one thousand dollars. The withdrawals were
- 5:31Speaker 1: made by Hayes alone. In the same month, Connie's mail
- 5:35Speaker 1: was redirected bank statements, insurance documents, property tax notices to
- 5:40Speaker 1: a post office box in Marfield registered in Hayes's name,
- 5:45Speaker 1: not Connie's name. Is The cutting garden she had planned
- 5:49Speaker 1: was still there, the food shelf schedules still had her
- 5:53Speaker 1: name on it, but the financial architecture of her life
- 5:56Speaker 1: was quietly being routed somewhere else, and the paper trail
- 6:00Speaker 1: that would have shown it was arriving at a box
- 6:03Speaker 1: she could not access. That is the first loop hold it.
- 6:07Speaker 1: The second loop opens. On a Wednesday morning, September twentieth,
- 6:10Speaker 1: twenty seventeen, Doug Fitch arrived at the Delworth Food Shelf
- 6:15Speaker 1: and waited. Connie Sawyer did not come. No call, no message.
- 6:20Speaker 1: He checked the roster seven years, zero absences and assumed
- 6:25Speaker 1: something minor had come up. He tried her number, no answer.
- 6:29Speaker 1: He tried again later, still nothing. Her car was in
- 6:32Speaker 1: the driveway on Fenwick Road. Her phone was not ringing.
- 6:36Speaker 1: Through the morning before September nineteenth, neighbor Pat Greer had
- 6:43Speaker 1: seen Connie outside blue Cardigan tortoisesell reading glasses, the ones
- 6:50Speaker 1: with the chip in the left lens. Greer described her
- 6:53Speaker 1: as tired, but otherwise herself. She was working in the garden.
- 6:57Speaker 1: That was the last confirmed sighting. Any one who knew
- 7:00Speaker 1: her would report. That night, at eleven forty seven in
- 7:04Speaker 1: the evening, a cell tower near Fenwick Road registered a
- 7:08Speaker 1: ping from Gordon Hayes's phone. Hayes would later tell investigators
- 7:12Speaker 1: he had been at Carl Briggs's apartment in Marfield that night.
- 7:16Speaker 1: Marfield is not near Fenwick Road, the two locations do
- 7:20Speaker 1: not overlap. Carl Briggs initially supported Hayes's account, he recanted
- 7:25Speaker 1: after investigators confronted him with the cell data. So the
- 7:28Speaker 1: alibi for the night Connie was last seen alive did
- 7:32Speaker 1: not hold and Hayes had documentation showing he was elsewhere.
- 7:36Speaker 1: The following day signed in at three Millbridge intake locations
- 7:40Speaker 1: across a ninety mile route, with witnesses at each stop.
- 7:44Speaker 1: The alibi for September twentieth was solid. The alibi for
- 7:48Speaker 1: September nineteenth was not. Keep both of those in mind,
- 7:52Speaker 1: they are not the same problem. September twenty second, an
- 7:55Speaker 1: obituary was written, listing Connie Sawyer's death as peace five
- 8:00Speaker 1: short illness. It was submitted to the Delworth Food on
- 8:04Speaker 1: September twenty eighth, sent from a Millbridge, a count by
- 8:09Speaker 1: Gordon Hayes. He listed himself as next of kin, as
- 8:13Speaker 1: surviving partner. No death certificate was filed in September, not
- 8:19Speaker 1: on the twenty second, not on any date in September.
- 8:22Speaker 1: A death certificate is a legal document, an obituary is not.
- 8:27Speaker 1: One requires a body, a medical examiner, a signature chain.
- 8:32Speaker 1: The other requires only someone willing to file it. October third,
- 8:36Speaker 1: the obituary ran in the Food October fourth, Melissa Sawyer
- 8:42Speaker 1: in Portland, Oregon read it. That was how she learned
- 8:46Speaker 1: her mother was dead. Hayes told her Connie had gone quickly.
- 8:50Speaker 1: He told her he hadn't wanted to burden her. There
- 8:53Speaker 1: is a detail that sits outside the timeline and refuses
- 8:57Speaker 1: to fit anywhere comfortable. A October tenth, twenty seventeen, a
- 9:02Speaker 1: surveyor named Terry Boyd was walking a vacant parcel behind
- 9:07Speaker 1: the Fenwick Road properties, sixty yards from Connie's rear property line.
- 9:12Speaker 1: He almost stepped on them before he noticed tored a
- 9:15Speaker 1: shell reading glasses, open lens up in a field that
- 9:19Speaker 1: had seen rain since September nineteenth, in a field where
- 9:23Speaker 1: no one lived and no one had reason to walk.
- 9:26Speaker 1: They were impossibly clean. The chip in the left lens
- 9:30Speaker 1: matched the pair Pat Greer had seen on Connie's face
- 9:33Speaker 1: the morning of September nineteenth. Those glasses had been sitting
- 9:37Speaker 1: in that field for three weeks, three weeks of weather,
- 9:41Speaker 1: and they looked, according to Boyd's statement, as if someone
- 9:44Speaker 1: had set them down and walked away, not dropped set down.
- 9:49Speaker 1: By October tenth, Connie Sawyer had already been dead for
- 9:52Speaker 1: three weeks, according to an obituary Gordon Hayes had filed,
- 9:56Speaker 1: but no death certificate existed, no body had been found,
- 10:00Speaker 1: and now her glasses were sitting open and clean. In
- 10:03Speaker 1: a field sixty yards from her back property line. Sharon
- 10:07Speaker 1: Larson had been working the case since mid September. Melissa
- 10:11Speaker 1: had retained her after Connie stopped returning calls in August,
- 10:15Speaker 1: before the obituary, before the food shelf absence, before any
- 10:19Speaker 1: of it became visible to anyone else. Larsen had twelve
- 10:23Speaker 1: years in domestic advocacy. She knew what slow rasure looked
- 10:27Speaker 1: like from the outside, and she had brought her findings
- 10:30Speaker 1: to Detective Art Delcot before the glasses were found. The
- 10:34Speaker 1: glasses moved the case. It is one thing to have
- 10:37Speaker 1: a missing woman whose mail has been re routed and
- 10:41Speaker 1: whose savings have been drained. It is another to have
- 10:43Speaker 1: a missing woman whose obituary exists without a death certificate,
- 10:47Speaker 1: and whose reading glasses have appeared in a field three
- 10:51Speaker 1: weeks after she was last seen wearing them. The search
- 10:54Speaker 1: for Connie's body began in Earnest. Four days later, on
- 10:59Speaker 1: October fourteenth, investigators located her in a drainage culvert behind
- 11:04Speaker 1: the Fenwick Road property. The medical examiner's findings were consistent
- 11:08Speaker 1: with asphyxiation. The time line placed her death on the
- 11:12Speaker 1: night of September nineteenth. The night. The cell tower placed
- 11:15Speaker 1: Hayes's phone at Fenwick Road at eleven forty seven. Picture
- 11:19Speaker 1: the Fenwick Road house on the night of September nineteenth.
- 11:23Speaker 1: Hayes is there, The cell data puts him there, and
- 11:26Speaker 1: his alibi witness eventually admitted it. Connie had been in
- 11:30Speaker 1: the garden that morning. By the following day, she did
- 11:33Speaker 1: not answer her phone, did not appear at the food shelf,
- 11:37Speaker 1: and was never seen again by anyone who knew her.
- 11:40Speaker 1: One version of events says the night unfolded as a confrontation.
- 11:44Speaker 1: The financial withdrawals had been made in June, the male
- 11:48Speaker 1: redirect was in place. If Connie had discovered what had
- 11:51Speaker 1: been done, the account the redirected statements the p O
- 11:55Speaker 1: box in Marfield the night of the nineteenth becomes a
- 11:58Speaker 1: crisis point. Hayes had built the whole structure on her isolation.
- 12:02Speaker 1: A single confrontation threatened to collapse it. But that version
- 12:06Speaker 1: requires something. It cannot fully prove that Connie knew. There
- 12:11Speaker 1: is no record of her contacting the bank, no call
- 12:14Speaker 1: to Melissa, no message to Janet Pew indicating she had
- 12:18Speaker 1: found out. If she had discovered the withdrawals before that night,
- 12:22Speaker 1: she left no trace of it that was recovered. The
- 12:25Speaker 1: version Hayes offered a trial, He offered no testimony, but
- 12:29Speaker 1: his partial confession to investigators carried its shape was different.
- 12:33Speaker 1: He admitted to the withdrawals, he said they were Connie's wish.
- 12:37Speaker 1: He admitted to filing the obituary. He said he was
- 12:40Speaker 1: overwhelmed with grief, that he had acted precipitously. He suggested
- 12:45Speaker 1: that Connie had experienced cognitive decline in her final months.
- 12:49Speaker 1: That last claim collapsed on contact with the record. Janet Pew,
- 12:53Speaker 1: Doug Fitch, Pat Greer, Melissa. No one who spent time
- 12:58Speaker 1: with Connie in twenty seventeen saw any sign of decline.
- 13:02Speaker 1: Her Wednesday attendance was unbroken through September thirteenth. Her last
- 13:07Speaker 1: confirmed call with Melissa was a Thursday in early September,
- 13:11Speaker 1: described as normal. The cognitive decline claim was not supported.
- 13:16Speaker 1: It was the kind of claim that works only if
- 13:19Speaker 1: the person who could contradict it is no longer present
- 13:22Speaker 1: to do so. There is a third shape to what happened,
- 13:25Speaker 1: one that recontextualizes the September twentieth alibi. Hayes spent the
- 13:30Speaker 1: following day signed in at three Millbridge locations across ninety miles.
- 13:36Speaker 1: Witnesses confirmed his presence at each stop. That alibi is solid,
- 13:41Speaker 1: but an alibi for September twentieth only matters if September
- 13:44Speaker 1: twentieth is when investigators believe the crime occurred. The cell
- 13:48Speaker 1: tower placed Hayes at Fenwick Road on the night of
- 13:51Speaker 1: the nineteenth. The medical examiner placed Connie's death on the
- 13:54Speaker 1: night of the nineteenth. The documented September twentieth alibi was
- 13:58Speaker 1: never relevant to the question of what happened to Connie Sawyer.
- 14:02Speaker 1: It was only relevant to the question of where Hayes was.
- 14:04Speaker 1: After the jury deliberated for eight hours, Hayes declined to testify.
- 14:10Speaker 1: The fiber evidence material from his jacket linked to Connie's clothing,
- 14:15Speaker 1: the cell tower data, the recanted alibi, the financial record,
- 14:19Speaker 1: and the glasses in the field were enough. Convicted on
- 14:24Speaker 1: all counts, sentenced to life without possibility of parole. Gordon
- 14:30Speaker 1: Hayes entered prison in the winter of twenty seventeen. The
- 14:34Speaker 1: sentence was life without possibility of parole. No appeal has
- 14:38Speaker 1: changed that outcome. The conviction rested on five independent pillars.
- 14:44Speaker 1: The fiber linking his jacket to Kanie's clothing, the cell
- 14:47Speaker 1: towered data placing his phone at Fenwick Road eleven minutes
- 14:50Speaker 1: before midnight on September nineteenth, Karl Briggs's recanted alibi, three
- 14:57Speaker 1: years of financial documentation, and a pair of tortoises shell
- 15:00Speaker 1: reading glasses found in a field sixty yards from the
- 15:04Speaker 1: property line. Any single one of those might have been
- 15:08Speaker 1: explained away together, they were not. Hayes never testified. The
- 15:13Speaker 1: cases of Francis Hooper and Sandra Ought remain officially closed.
- 15:18Speaker 1: In two thousand and eight, in Carver, Francis Hooper died
- 15:21Speaker 1: after losing her home through what records describe as predatory lending.
- 15:26Speaker 1: The person who introduced her to that process was never
- 15:29Speaker 1: formally identified. A composite sketch drawn from Hooper's sister's description
- 15:35Speaker 1: matches Hayes on seven of nine descriptors, according to investigators
- 15:39Speaker 1: who later reviewed the file. In twenty eleven, Radick Parish,
- 15:43Speaker 1: Sandra Ought died of causes listed as natural. Hayes was
- 15:47Speaker 1: named in a handwritten will that post dated his arrival
- 15:50Speaker 1: in her life by approximately four months. No charges were
- 15:54Speaker 1: filed in either case. The evidence officially was thin. What
- 15:58Speaker 1: that means is that Francis uz Hooper and Sandra Aught
- 16:01Speaker 1: have no legal resolution, their families have no conviction to
- 16:05Speaker 1: point to. The deaths are listed as natural, and the
- 16:09Speaker 1: record does not say otherwise. Millbridge Comfort Care issued a
- 16:14Speaker 1: statement after Hayes's arrest confirming that his contract had been
- 16:18Speaker 1: for intake and referral work, only that he held no
- 16:21Speaker 1: clinical license, and that the organization had no knowledge of
- 16:25Speaker 1: his visits to Connie Sawyer or to any other bereaved
- 16:29Speaker 1: individual outside his defined scope. The death notice in the
- 16:33Speaker 1: Delworth Food Paul Sawyer's death notice, which Hayes read and
- 16:38Speaker 1: used to locate Connie, was a public record. It named
- 16:42Speaker 1: an address, It named a widow, It named a grief
- 16:46Speaker 1: Anne Quill. Milbridge's director said in subsequent interviews that the
- 16:50Speaker 1: organization immediately audited how contractor identifiers were used and revised
- 16:56Speaker 1: its verification protocols. Whether those revivals were sufficient is a
- 17:01Speaker 1: question each county in which organizations like Millbridge operate will
- 17:06Speaker 1: have to answer for itself. Sharon Larson, the advocate Melissa
- 17:10Speaker 1: retained in September of twenty seventeen, has spoken publicly about
- 17:15Speaker 1: what she describes as a structural gap bereaved people are
- 17:19Speaker 1: among the most statistically vulnerable to financial exploitation, and the
- 17:24Speaker 1: systems designed to protect them rarely reached. The weeks immediately
- 17:28Speaker 1: after a death notice runs. That gap between the moment
- 17:31Speaker 1: of public grief and the moment any formal support structure
- 17:35Speaker 1: activates is where Hayes worked. It is not a gap
- 17:38Speaker 1: unique to Delworth. Connie Sawyer wanted a cutting garden. That
- 17:43Speaker 1: detail comes from the real estate notes on the Fenwick
- 17:46Speaker 1: Road property and from what Melissa remembered her mother saying
- 17:50Speaker 1: the spring after Paul died. She had looked at the
- 17:53Speaker 1: south facing lot and talked about Zenia's Dahlia's something she
- 17:58Speaker 1: could bring inside in ourmas. She never planted it. By
- 18:02Speaker 1: the time she moved in, someone else was occupying most
- 18:05Speaker 1: of her attention, and then most of her life, and
- 18:08Speaker 1: then the account she had built across thirty years of work.
- 18:11Speaker 1: Pat Greer saw her on the morning of September nineteenth,
- 18:14Speaker 1: twenty seventeen, in the garden space she never filled. She
- 18:19Speaker 1: was wearing the blue cardigan. She had the tortoise shell
- 18:22Speaker 1: glasses on the ones with the chip in the left lands.
- 18:25Speaker 1: Pat Greer said she looked tired, but otherwise herself. That
- 18:29Speaker 1: is the last confirmed image of Connie Sawyer alive. The
- 18:32Speaker 1: glasses turned up three weeks later in a field, open
- 18:36Speaker 1: and lens up impossibly clean. Terry Boyd found them while
- 18:40Speaker 1: conducting a survey of the adjacent parcel. He almost walked
- 18:44Speaker 1: past them. He stopped because something about the way they
- 18:47Speaker 1: were placed did not fit the landscape. Objects dropped in
- 18:51Speaker 1: fields do not land like that they fall. These had
- 18:55Speaker 1: been set down. Melissa Sawyer learned her mother was dead
- 18:59Speaker 1: from an abittion ctuary in a local newspaper. The obituary
- 19:03Speaker 1: listed Gordon Hayes as next of kin and surviving partner.
- 19:07Speaker 1: There was no death certificate, There was no phone call,
- 19:10Speaker 1: there was no conversation she was permitted to be part
- 19:13Speaker 1: of while her mother was still alive to have it.
- 19:16Speaker 1: What Hayes dismantled was not only a financial account or
- 19:20Speaker 1: of physical safety. He dismantled the architecture of a life,
- 19:24Speaker 1: the Wednesday routines, the Thursday calls, the friendships, the daughter's
- 19:29Speaker 1: knowledge of her own mother's days. He replaced it, piece
- 19:32Speaker 1: by piece with a version he controlled. By the time
- 19:35Speaker 1: anyone on the outside could see the shape of what
- 19:38Speaker 1: had happened, Connie Sawyer had been gone from the places
- 19:42Speaker 1: that knew her for weeks. The cutting garden at Fenwick
- 19:45Speaker 1: Road was never planted. Melissa has said in the time
- 19:49Speaker 1: since the trial that she thinks about the zinnias not
- 19:53Speaker 1: as a symbol, as a fact. Her mother had a
- 19:56Speaker 1: plan for that ground, and the plan was interrupted, and
- 19:59Speaker 1: the g is still there. That is the thing about
- 20:03Speaker 1: this case that resists easy closure. The verdict is final,
- 20:08Speaker 1: the sentence is permanent, and none of it gives Connie
- 20:10Speaker 1: Sawyer back the spring she was planning for. This show
- 20:15Speaker 1: is made by Oboe Media.