Latest / Constellations and all that... / 78. Nature, Women's Wisdom & Family Constellations with Cushla Sheridan

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78. Nature, Women's Wisdom & Family Constellations with Cushla Sheridan · Constellations and all that...

• 0:00
  Tracy: Kia ora, and welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:03
  Tracy: I'm your host, Tracey Cartwright, and together we will be exploring the world of family constellations with facilitators from, and clients from around the world, looking at different perspectives and experiences in the work, having a cup of tea and just chatting with some friends around their experiences in constellations.
• 0:23
  Tracy: We'd love for you to join us.
• 0:25
  Tracy: I hope that you enjoy this series as much as I have loved making it.
• 0:34
  Tracy: Kia ora, everyone.
• 0:35
  Tracy: Welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:38
  Tracy: Today on this beautiful, sunny, crisp morning here in Aotearoa, I have the pleasure of chatting with my friend, Cushla Sheridan.
• 0:46
  Tracy: Hey, Cushla.
• 0:47
  Tracy: How are you doing?
• 0:48
  Cushla: Hi, Tracy.
• 0:49
  Cushla: How are you?
• 0:49
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 0:50
  Cushla: Lovely to be on, and so looking forward to this conversation.
• 0:54
  Cushla: Oh,
• 0:54
  Tracy: I'm so glad that you said yes to coming on, coming on.
• 0:58
  Tracy: It's beautiful.
• 0:59
  Tracy: Um, so I'm gonna invite you to share a little bit, just a brief introduction of yourself, whatever that is sitting there for you.
• 1:06
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 1:06
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 1:07
  Cushla: So I guess for your listeners, they can probably tell already that I have an accent.
• 1:14
  Cushla: Um, so I'm originally from Ireland, but I've been living in beautiful Aotearoa now for 15 years.
• 1:21
  Cushla: So I met, um, a Kiwi guy when I was working in Crete at a yoga center, and, um, yeah, we decided to come back to the Bay of Islands, um, up north, uh, in the North Island of New Zealand.
• 1:35
  Cushla: And we, um, set up a beautiful retreat here, which is coastal and also has about 40 acres of land.
• 1:44
  Cushla: So it's very lovely being on this precious piece of, of beauty really.
• 1:50
  Cushla: And, uh, yeah, we, we, um, came back here, and it was mostly pasture, like farming land.
• 1:56
  Cushla: So we planted 120,000 trees over five years and really, um, you know, regenerated the land, and then the birds came back and, um, yeah, it's, it's just a beautiful spot up here.
• 2:08
  Cushla: I have two children.
• 2:10
  Cushla: I guess, um, probably good to say that I'm not a family constellation facilitator from the onset.
• 2:18
  Cushla: But I think probably you and your listeners will understand when I say that through all the modalities I do, that I work in the field, in the field of consciousness.
• 2:28
  Cushla: So I'm a yoga teacher, energy healer, Reiki, chakra, and Irish healing as well.
• 2:35
  Cushla: Um, it was the last one that I found, and, um, which is kind of funny as well.
• 2:40
  Cushla: Um, I also do a little bit of sound healing with the drum.
• 2:45
  Cushla: I made my beautiful drum with you, which was very special, special day.
• 2:50
  Cushla: And I guess probably what overrides all of the work that I do is a focus or a, a, um, an attention to or re- reclamation of the womb, the feminine, and the earth.
• 3:06
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 3:07
  Cushla: So all of those three things together kind of, you know, pervades all of my work.
• 3:13
  Cushla: And at the moment, I am having focused a lot on the maiden and the mother womb when my daughter was younger.
• 3:22
  Cushla: Um, and now I'm nearly 50.
• 3:24
  Cushla: Um, I'm kind of delving into the menopausal womb, yeah, which is a whole different energy, which I'm really keen to explore and to help other women with that.
• 3:37
  Cushla: So that's a little bit about me.
• 3:39
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 3:40
  Tracy: And I've been a, I've been privileged to experience, um, a bit of your work, and, and we did the maiden, the mother.
• 3:48
  Cushla: The rites of passage.
• 3:49
  Cushla: The rites of passage.
• 3:50
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 3:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 3:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 3:51
  Cushla: They were beautiful.
• 3:51
  Cushla: And it was,
• 3:51
  Tracy: it was stunning.
• 3:52
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 3:52
  Tracy: And just the shifts.
• 3:55
  Tracy: For me and my journey, 'cause it was quite a tumultuous journey for me through my life.
• 3:59
  Tracy: It can
• 3:59
  Cushla: be bumpy.
• 3:59
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 4:00
  Cushla: It
• 4:00
  Tracy: really helped, and there was just some moments of complete, like those a-ha moments that were like, poof, the earth just moved underneath my feet- Mm … recognizing stuff.
• 4:10
  Tracy: So I can attest to, um, to your beautiful gifts that you bring through and the work that you, that you share, so very grateful.
• 4:19
  Tracy: Um-
• 4:20
  Cushla: And likewise for you.
• 4:21
  Cushla: I mean, I was, um, very privileged to have done family constellations with you on and off for five years.
• 4:28
  Cushla: Well, I think I probably went to every one that you put on for five years.
• 4:32
  Cushla: Mm. And that was deeply healing for me, for my family, um, my original family, and also for my kids.
• 4:39
  Cushla: You know, you could just, the, you'd literally come back from the workshop with you, and I could just see the change in my kids already.
• 4:46
  Cushla: Like, it really spiraled outwards and downwards, and that flow through of energy as things get freed up in the past is really… So I, it's a mutual, mutual appreciation society today, Tracey.
• 5:01
  Cushla: Well, I really appreciate your work too.
• 5:03
  Tracy: Thank you.
• 5:03
  Tracy: And, and I, I always giggle when we talk about the, your beautiful retreat center because do you remember the story I told you about, um… And I think it was maybe be- before you purchased the property, that there had been… And I, correct me if I'm wrong.
• 5:18
  Tracy: The pro- the house had been started by someone else, the base of the house.
• 5:23
  Cushla: Yeah, maybe.
• 5:25
  Tracy: And, um, I had been on, um, with my husband and our little, our little boy, and my daughters and his, some of his family were out on their boat for the day.
• 5:36
  Tracy: And I'm not big on the wa- going on the water.
• 5:39
  Tracy: Anyway, we drove into, we drove, yeah, well, maybe we did drive our little boat into this little cove, and I could see the beach.
• 5:46
  Tracy: And I was just like, "I really wanna go over there and onto the beach." So I got off the boat and swam over.
• 5:52
  Tracy: And it turned out to be the cove, the beautiful secluded cove where your house is.
• 5:57
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 5:58
  Cushla: Actually, I do remember you telling me that now.
• 6:00
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 6:00
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 6:00
  Cushla: So funny.
• 6:01
  Cushla: Spent a little
• 6:01
  Tracy: bit of time there and thought,"Ooh." I felt a little bit cheeky'cause I could see that there was some s- construction underway.
• 6:07
  Tracy: Um, but I was like, "Oh, I'm sure they won't mind. I'm not gonna do any harm." Yeah.
• 6:11
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 6:11
  Cushla: And then when I
• 6:12
  Tracy: got to come to your place and be there, and I was like-"Oh, I've been here before.
• 6:15
  Tracy: This is amazing." So yeah.
• 6:19
  Tracy: Trusting.
• 6:20
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 6:20
  Tracy: Beautiful.
• 6:21
  Tracy: So your, um, retreat center is in Russell.
• 6:25
  Cushla: Yeah, Kororaeka Russell.
• 6:27
  Cushla: It's, um, a beautiful little village.
• 6:29
  Cushla: Mm. And, um, so my husband's parents were already living here, and we would come and visit them.
• 6:35
  Cushla: And we just went, "Oh, wouldn't this be just idyllic for, to bring up children?" And so we moved back here, um, maybe 15 years ago now.
• 6:44
  Cushla: And so the kids spent all their childhood here, and it's just such a lovely community to, to be in.
• 6:50
  Cushla: Um, yeah, it's very gorgeous.
• 6:54
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 6:55
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 6:55
  Tracy: Now, I know that, as you just shared, you've done quite a bit of constellation work with me.
• 7:00
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 7:01
  Tracy: How did you f- what, how did you first meet constellations?
• 7:04
  Tracy: Was it through me or through some other-
• 7:06
  Cushla: Yeah, it was, it was through you.
• 7:07
  Cushla: I think I'd come back from Ireland on a trip, and there was issues around a property or a house, um, within my family.
• 7:15
  Cushla: And, and I just had some kind of recollection of, "Gosh, this story sounds familiar. I'm sure somebody's told me this happened in the past before." And I seen an ad for family constellations just on the, you know, Facebook, whatever, and whatever it was that you'd written, I went, "Okay. I don't know what that is, but I think that's what I need." Um, and so yeah, it's, it's interesting as well, the energy that, that properties and land holds.
• 7:45
  Cushla: And, and- Mm … a lot of the first kind of constellations, um, we did together was around that, and how the energy around that house played out between two people in my family.
• 7:58
  Cushla: Didn't get sorted, and then it played out again with the- Mm … one of the initial people, and then two others.
• 8:05
  Cushla: So same dynamics, brother, sister each time, and then got played out again.
• 8:10
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 8:11
  Cushla: Interesting.
• 8:12
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 8:13
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 8:13
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 8:13
  Tracy: The, those r- repeating patterns.
• 8:15
  Tracy: I'm l- I'm, as we're talking, I'm sitting here with a book by Angwin St.
• 8:19
  Tracy: Just, and she talks about- Time, space, and fractals.
• 8:23
  Tracy: And a lot of, a lot of what she talks about is, um, how things repeat on in places, like the land holding the energy as well.
• 8:32
  Tracy: And how, um, not only can the same situation evolve through the families, but also, um, things can happen on that land again and again, again, again.
• 8:42
  Cushla: So- Yes.
• 8:43
  Cushla: Yeah, until somebody does some work around the land- Yeah … to clear it.
• 8:47
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 8:47
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 8:47
  Cushla: For sure.
• 8:49
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 8:50
  Tracy: Hey, tell me about this Irish healing.
• 8:52
  Tracy: That sounds really interesting.
• 8:54
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 8:54
  Cushla: And, and you know, it cracks me… I love life.
• 8:56
  Cushla: Life cracks me up, you know.
• 8:58
  Cushla: First of all, like very early in my 20s, I found Reiki, um, the Japanese, you know, healing.
• 9:05
  Cushla: And then was chakra healing, the Indian kind of lineage.
• 9:09
  Cushla: And it wasn't until maybe, um, I'd say maybe six or seven years ago that I found out, um, a little bit more about Irish healing and trained in that, um, with some beautiful practitioners in Ireland.
• 9:22
  Cushla: And, um, I'd known a little bit about them and really admired their work.
• 9:26
  Cushla: And then COVID came, and they went online.
• 9:30
  Cushla: And so it was perfect timing that I could- Mm … didn't have to go back to Ireland for their training.
• 9:34
  Cushla: I mean, the, it, it, sometimes they call it Irish shamanic healing, but, you know, uh, that sense of the indigenous in Ireland is often, um, they're termed druids.
• 9:47
  Cushla: And so I kind of like that, that terminology as well.
• 9:51
  Cushla: I'm still playing a little bit about the terminology- Mm … 'cause some people don't know that here.
• 9:55
  Cushla: But yeah, so it's a beautiful system that sets up around nature, so it's not connected to any religion.
• 10:05
  Cushla: Um, I guess probably a term pagan might be, um, one that some people might- Um, and of no, which basically means of the land.
• 10:17
  Cushla: Um, so i- it sets up, um, like a paradigm, a spiritual paradigm around, you know, the, the, the, um, the wind.
• 10:29
  Cushla: Um, and s- if you want, you can bring in some of the mythology, some of the, the Tuatha Dé Danann, the gods and goddesses of, um, old Ireland, if you want.
• 10:40
  Cushla: Um, and so I work mostly with, um, the energy of a river, um, Boann, um- Mm which is a mythological river, a myth- mythological goddess, Boann, and an actual river in Ireland.
• 10:54
  Cushla: And in the mythology, she was said to have, um, walked around a well the wrong way, um, reclaimed something that was only, uh, meant for men, um, which I guess, it, before patriarchy, the, the wells were, um, always tended to by the women.
• 11:17
  Cushla: Um, but, uh, in, in this story, the, her husband and the men were tending to the well.
• 11:23
  Cushla: So there's a lot of like, you know, that, that shift in cultural consciousness and timeframes- Yeah … coming into it.
• 11:31
  Cushla: Um, and, and perfect for now as we see the feminine come back into alignment with a masculine that is healthy and sacred.
• 11:42
  Cushla: So she walked around the well the wrong way, and the well ro- water rose up and dismembered her, and she became the River Boann, the River Boyne in Ireland, which brought healing to all of Ireland and to all of the land.
• 11:57
  Cushla: So, and in that healing is, is, um, a terminology called imbas forosnai, divine illumination.
• 12:05
  Cushla: And so that's what I work with, um, that lineage when I do, um, energy healing now.
• 12:12
  Cushla: So it, it feels very grounded healing, so it's, it's a different- Yeah … it's a different sense from some of the kind of galactic, you know, um, out- outer Healing Yeah You know, do you know what I mean?
• 12:28
  Cushla: Yeah Um, and it, and it works really well with women's bodies in that they can
• 12:34
  Tracy: take it- Absolutely, with that flow
• 12:36
  Cushla: they can take it in and it integrates very easily.
• 12:41
  Cushla: Mm. Like, you know, it's not this kind of spacious out of body.
• 12:45
  Cushla: It's very much an embodied, um, sensory kind of experience.
• 12:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 12:52
  Cushla: So I really- Mm … love working.
• 12:53
  Cushla: And I mean, you know, it's like everything when you're working in the field, it depends where you laser beam your focus.
• 13:00
  Cushla: And so mine has been with the womb, with nature, with the earth.
• 13:04
  Cushla: And so you can move towards or away from any of those things.
• 13:09
  Cushla: And so most of the things- Mm … in the Earth's energy are sacredness and life, and can bring that to your, to your way of being.
• 13:21
  Cushla: You know, I just did, um, a beautiful, um, work with the bees and the consciousness of unity.
• 13:28
  Cushla: Um- Yes … as we become a little bit more fragmented in our culture, I find that that was what was needed.
• 13:35
  Cushla: Um-
• 13:36
  Tracy: Love that.
• 13:36
  Tracy: We've been talking about bees and Ansje, our, um, constellation team as well.
• 13:42
  Tracy: So- Mm … do you, do you wanna share a little bit more about that?
• 13:45
  Tracy: Like, the, the how the bees-
• 13:47
  Cushla: The bees- … have shown up the bees have, have been in my life for a long time because, um, one of my other places that I love is Crete.
• 13:56
  Cushla: It's like my home away from home.
• 13:57
  Cushla: And the Melissa there are the, the bee priestesses, the goddesses of the womb.
• 14:03
  Cushla: And so they've come in a lot to do the womb work, but recently they've come in in the last sort of three or four years to do with that unity consciousness where, um, you know, in, in the hive, the, all the bees have different jobs, but they're all working towards one singular goal.
• 14:23
  Cushla: Mm. And if you s- if you've ever seen, I have had the amazing experience of seeing, um, a swarm.
• 14:30
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 14:30
  Cushla: And they, they move as one.
• 14:33
  Cushla: You know, they're so unified
• 14:35
  Tracy: That's it, morphogenic, isn't it?
• 14:37
  Cushla: Yes
• 14:38
  Tracy: Morphogenic field, it's like.
• 14:39
  Cushla: And when you're in that field, you know, if we take it down to the personal level then, which the bees can help you with, it's like, well, how can I hate you when we are one and the same, you know?
• 14:53
  Cushla: And so it brings in that sense of deep love, and even if you don't understand someone's behavior or you don't like it, at least you can see the trails of where it's come from, and that perhaps there was woundings there and, you know, so you're not going to hit on that person.
• 15:12
  Cushla: You're actually going to give them even more love, even if you're not- Such a constellation,
• 15:16
  Tracy: isn't
• 15:17
  Cushla: it?
• 15:17
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 15:17
  Cushla: Even if you're not in, in, you know, physicali- physicality, you don't wanna be in the space with them.
• 15:23
  Cushla: Yeah You could send them love from your heart to help with their healing.
• 15:27
  Cushla: So the bees have a lot to t- I mean, everything in, in nature has a lot to teach us, and I think, you know, there's this such a, a huge thing in the human field where we are better and more intelligent than everyone else.
• 15:42
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 15:43
  Cushla: And I come back down to them, "My God, please teach me. I've so much to learn from you," whether it be the kawakawa plant or, you know, the little pikiwaka, you know, the, the little fantail that comes into your house.
• 15:56
  Cushla: Like, what are you teaching me today, you know?
• 15:59
  Cushla: And so when we can move into a field of consciousness, whatever it is, then you can commune with anything that you want to in life.
• 16:10
  Cushla: And, you know, I would say, how do we know that kawakawa is good for X, Y, and Z?
• 16:16
  Cushla: Well, because in the past people were actually open to speaking with in some form, with plant, with animal, with ocean, with- Mm … a tree, you know?
• 16:30
  Cushla: A- and, and so we can do that again.
• 16:33
  Cushla: It's, you know, it's, it's, it's a good way to live.
• 16:38
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 16:39
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 16:40
  Tracy: So you, at your beautiful s- um, space, you do yoga.
• 16:45
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 16:45
  Tracy: But you also run retreats and have a space where people can- Can
• 16:50
  Cushla: stay as well, yeah … can stay as well.
• 16:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 16:52
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 16:52
  Cushla: So at the minute I'm, um, running Wise Woman Menopausal Retreats, which I'm really excited about.
• 16:59
  Cushla: So we're reclaiming, um, a stage in our life that has, I think, culturally become… It's great that there's so much information about it now, but I think it's been really limited to, um, to a physicality and a, a, you know, a r- what symptoms you have, which need to be addressed, absolutely, especially if they are really impacting your life.
• 17:27
  Cushla: But I think we're missing, with all the blood mysteries, with your first menarche and with the mother, you know, as if you're birthing in this lifetime, um, we're missing the spiritual, you know, and emotional and, and psychological aspects of these huge potentials for growth.
• 17:45
  Cushla: Um, and also I think, you know, like we did the rites of passage, if you don't have someone or something that is taking you from one stage to the next, it can all just blur into one big thing.
• 18:00
  Cushla: And there are aspects of being a mother that you need to say goodbye to, and perhaps there's some things that you need to show or feel some grief or sadness over.
• 18:14
  Cushla: Perhaps there's some things that you want to hold in your heart forever, you know?
• 18:19
  Cushla: And, and it's great to have just somebody as a guide to, um, help you through that space of letting go of one stage and then moving into the next, you know, or that menopausal woman, um, so that you can come into a different stage of, of power, authenticity, where your sole focus is not on supporting, nurturing, and caring for everyone else.
• 18:44
  Tracy: I was gonna say, there's so much when you begin to unpack that.
• 18:47
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 18:47
  Tracy: Yeah, yeah.
• 18:49
  Tracy: Yeah, a lot.
• 18:50
  Tracy: A- and if we think back to the generations many generations ago really, where they often didn't have the symptoms that we have today.
• 18:59
  Tracy: A lot of the symptoms are influenced by the industrial era and the- Yeah … and, and the options- And just the speed of life and the, and the s- exactly- Yeah … the speed of life.
• 19:08
  Tracy: Um, so it's like you can, we can tap into what was there, but it's also finding a new way of taking it forward, you know?
• 19:17
  Tracy: Taking some of that a- that and, and finding what's working now, how can we bring in those pauses, like the meno-pause, right?
• 19:25
  Cushla: Yes.
• 19:27
  Tracy: We want to go there.
• 19:28
  Tracy: Um, the bleeding and the pausing and the bleeding.
• 19:31
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 19:32
  Cushla: There is a lovely, um, I can't remember her name, but there is a lady in England, and she is, um, uh, what would you say?
• 19:40
  Cushla: Pro- not, protesting isn't the right word.
• 19:42
  Cushla: Um, advocating for, um, a year, just like you do after you've had a baby, so that you have a year out of work, of life, that you can, you know, truly, um, rest in that time, which is, is so often needed and yet impossible for most women who are working, have perhaps teenage children.
• 20:06
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 20:06
  Cushla: Maybe on the other end of the scale their parents are growing older and need more help, you know.
• 20:11
  Cushla: It's actually sometimes a time when there's more that you have to do than at other times.
• 20:16
  Cushla: And so, um, I, I always say, you know, if something seems impossible, start with five minutes.
• 20:23
  Cushla: What would five minutes of that thing look like?
• 20:26
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 20:26
  Cushla: So, you know, I'm going to put five minutes of rest into my day today.
• 20:31
  Tracy: Love that.
• 20:31
  Cushla: Or five minutes- Yeah … of time for me.
• 20:35
  Cushla: Five minutes of quiet.
• 20:36
  Cushla: And so there's always a possibility of something.
• 20:40
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 20:41
  Tracy: I'm as, as we speak, I'm in week two of recovery after some major surgery.
• 20:47
  Tracy: And- Mm … that pausing when I'm…'Cause my head feels really good, you know?
• 20:52
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 20:52
  Tracy: It's, it's just there's some physical things that I need to rest with for quite some time.
• 20:57
  Tracy: And, and it's that stopping, 'cause I've been on a go, go, go, you know?
• 21:03
  Tracy: And like you say, I've, I've just walked the journey with my parents and, you know, having raised children- Yeah and then walking that journey with my parents and, um, and actually pausing to give myself this time is a process.
• 21:19
  Tracy: Every day I'm, like, going through this little process of holding back.
• 21:22
  Tracy: Mm. Holding myself back just to- Be able to receive Beautiful.
• 21:29
  Tracy: 'Cause I'm just- I love that you're doing that with- So, yeah, I've just been giving.
• 21:33
  Tracy: And then in that giving you can overlook other things too, right?
• 21:37
  Tracy: So- Mm-hmm … so I'm journaling a lot more and taking that time.
• 21:42
  Tracy: It's not a year, but it's gonna be.
• 21:44
  Tracy: Last year was so frantic, but this year it's gonna be, uh, so far.
• 21:49
  Cushla: Beautiful.
• 21:49
  Tracy: I'm learning new ways.
• 21:51
  Cushla: And when you speak of that, I go back to your earlier comment about the Industrial Revolution.
• 21:56
  Cushla: Mm. And it is that move away from, you know, the s- the, the rhythm of the land.
• 22:03
  Cushla: You know, we're made up of all the minerals and, you know, we're actually made up of earth.
• 22:10
  Cushla: Mm. And so, and, and all the food we intake.
• 22:13
  Cushla: So when we're out of misalignment with the rhythm of the land or the rhythm of the earth, then we're not healthy.
• 22:21
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 22:22
  Cushla: And so, you know, it's, was just a natural part of our daily life, um, in winter that there would be less to do, and there would be less daylight.
• 22:32
  Cushla: And so for the last 200 years or so, our, our biology is n- not, you know, it's trying to catch up almost with, you know, daylight and phones everywhere.
• 22:45
  Cushla: Like, you can work anytime, anywhere now.
• 22:49
  Tracy: Even electricity, right?
• 22:50
  Tracy: Yeah That changed so much because- Yeah … lights were able to be on.
• 22:53
  Tracy: You could see so much more than a candle.
• 22:56
  Cushla: Exactly.
• 22:57
  Cushla: So you had to do, you can do, you know, you can do your dishes right up till 12 o'clock at night or, you know, whatever.
• 23:02
  Cushla: So there's, yeah, it's, it's, it's a trick this, this life, this, this, you know, space and time that we're in.
• 23:10
  Cushla: It's, it, and, and you can get on the, a real wheel, a real hamster wheel trying to play catch up all the time, and it's really good to have then your, your practices to come back into self.
• 23:22
  Cushla: And yoga is brilliant for that.
• 23:25
  Cushla: Mm. Any- being out in nature, you know, any time, if you're really present to it, will just take you home again.
• 23:32
  Cushla: Um- Yeah … yeah, and, and those practices are particularly important during menopause.
• 23:39
  Cushla: And, you know, as we reclaim our menstrual cycle and our first blood for our daughters, hopefully, and I think it's really coming in now that we're teaching them cycle awareness so that they're having a few days when they're bleeding that they can rest a little bit more, not plan so much- And so if you're practicing that every month, you know, by the time you get to 40 and the perimenopause, then you've got a lot of practices under your belt that will come in really handy then for those times when you don't feel that good, when you feel angry or fearful or just flat.
• 24:18
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 24:18
  Cushla: You know?
• 24:20
  Cushla: Um, and I guess in that, in tho- those spaces there are things that we want to reclaim, which help us move into the next stage.
• 24:28
  Cushla: So, you know, the anger was huge for me.
• 24:31
  Cushla: I'm Irish and an Aries, so there's always fire.
• 24:36
  Cushla: Um, and so, like, I was super angry about a woman's power and a woman's spirituality.
• 24:43
  Cushla: So I, I just did something about it, and I, you know, set up the moon groups, the moon mother-moon daughter groups, and- Yeah … uh, and I f- like, there was so much energy and fuel driving that.
• 24:55
  Cushla: And instead of fighting the system, I set up a different system.
• 25:00
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 25:01
  Cushla: And I think that's where, you know, if women can, you know, get into sacred activism in that time and actually use that anger.
• 25:09
  Cushla: Like, what are you really angry about?
• 25:11
  Cushla: What are you wanting to reclaim in this stage of your life?
• 25:14
  Cushla: Um, then, then we'll see some shifts in culture and society and, and that's the beauty of that stage, you know?
• 25:22
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 25:23
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 25:24
  Tracy: And i- and in that reclaiming, part of it, this is my belief, is, is accepting what has, has been here now.
• 25:34
  Tracy: Yes.
• 25:34
  Tracy: And then you turn and you're reclaiming… With my little tool in my hand.
• 25:37
  Tracy: I was massaging myself.
• 25:39
  Tracy: You're reclaiming, um, and y- and you're going in this new system that you're creating for yourself, right?
• 25:44
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 25:45
  Tracy: You're looking for this new way of being.
• 25:47
  Tracy: So otherwise we're focused, we're busy focusing here at what didn't work.
• 25:50
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 25:51
  Tracy: What hasn't aligned for us.
• 25:54
  Tracy: All of the- Shite that we have carried for the generations or we're immersed and entangled in.
• 26:01
  Tracy: But yeah, it's acknowledge that- Yes … 'cause we can't change that, but we can change where we go now.
• 26:07
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 26:08
  Cushla: That's exactly it.
• 26:09
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 26:10
  Cushla: And I think family constellations does that beautifully as well, you know?
• 26:14
  Cushla: There's such a, a powerful positive in, in that work, you know?
• 26:19
  Cushla: Like it really-- when you're in that field of working with it, you can feel the shift- Mm … too.
• 26:26
  Cushla: Like a- and, and I feel like that's as well within our bodies, within our spirit, within our emotions, like we want to heal.
• 26:33
  Cushla: You know, it's, it's, it's almost like the, the body, the whole frequency changes.
• 26:38
  Cushla: Like it's so possible, and I love that.
• 26:42
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 26:43
  Tracy: I love that.
• 26:43
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 26:43
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 26:44
  Tracy: Do you still have your labyrinth?
• 26:46
  Tracy: Yes.
• 26:47
  Tracy: Yes, I do.
• 26:48
  Tracy: 'Cause that was the first time I'd ever experienced one.
• 26:51
  Tracy: Seen many, um, you know, in images and maybe, um, at gardens some, but I'd never… And maybe I'd walked around one once, but not in the context that I did with you where you guided us through that experience.
• 27:06
  Tracy: Man, I remember that was so potent.
• 27:07
  Tracy: Mm. I think I- So powerful
• 27:10
  Cushla: I, I, my labyrinth that I set up is a womb portal space.
• 27:15
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 27:15
  Cushla: So, um, and I think that one I did was with stones or wood.
• 27:21
  Cushla: Yes.
• 27:21
  Cushla: And I have a permanent one now.
• 27:23
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 27:23
  Cushla: Um, that I, um, got my husband on board to, with his weed eater.
• 27:28
  Cushla: So it's actually made out of the grass of the land.
• 27:31
  Cushla: So we mapped it out first of all.
• 27:34
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 27:34
  Cushla: Um, and, and then now it is permanently on the land.
• 27:38
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 27:38
  Cushla: Is
• 27:39
  Tracy: it in the same place up with the donkeys?
• 27:40
  Cushla: No.
• 27:41
  Cushla: Yeah, yeah, yeah, up there on the top of the hill.
• 27:43
  Cushla: Yeah, it's beautiful.
• 27:44
  Cushla: And so I- Mm … I drum.
• 27:46
  Cushla: Um, and you know, as you know with the drum, once you bring in the drum, the spirit just rides in so powerfully on that.
• 27:54
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 27:54
  Cushla: Doesn't it?
• 27:54
  Cushla: It loves that energy, that frequency.
• 27:57
  Cushla: And so, yeah, for the menopausal womb, but also for the other womb spaces as well.
• 28:03
  Cushla: Um- Yeah … I'll drum as they walk into their womb and what they wanna let go of, and then walk back out again, what they want to, you know, bring into that next stage of their life.
• 28:12
  Cushla: Yeah, I love that.
• 28:13
  Cushla: And the land, the land here is so supportive.
• 28:16
  Cushla: Like, it really rises up to meet me, to meet the people who, who come and stay on it.
• 28:22
  Cushla: Um- It's beautiful … and even some people who, who just come for a, a treatment or a class, they, they say,"It's almost like I entered in some different space." My driveway is a m- a mi- a kilometer long, and they say,"When I come off the road, it's like I w- entered into a different time and space." Mm-hmm.
• 28:40
  Cushla: And then that kilometer coming down to, to, to the studio is just, yeah, beautiful.
• 28:46
  Cushla: So the land really supports all the work I do here, and sometimes, yeah.
• 28:51
  Cushla: The, um, um, it's called Te Hene Ruru, and I'll, I'll tell you a story about this.
• 28:57
  Cushla: So as I was setting it up, I was thinking, "What am I gonna call this, you know, retreat?" And, um, so that was floating in my mind, and I did a journey one night.
• 29:07
  Cushla: Um, and the, the owl came in really strongly for my own personal healing.
• 29:14
  Cushla: And the next day, um, I got up out of bed, and my son, he was pretty young at the time, he said, "Mum, Mum, there's something on the ground." And I went over, and it was this tiny little ruru, and we went and I, we, I gave it some, some energy healing, and then stood back, and it, it managed to fly away.
• 29:33
  Cushla: I think it had bumped into, like, a window or something.
• 29:36
  Cushla: Oh, wow.
• 29:37
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 29:37
  Cushla: And so I went, "Gosh, this is really…" And I don't know why it led me to, I just started googling, and then I find Hine Ruru.
• 29:46
  Cushla: And who is, um, a beautiful Maori goddess, um, oftentimes of the night of, um, that transitional time of death and life.
• 29:57
  Cushla: Um, and then so I spoke to some of the elders in the community, the kaumatua, and said, "You know, how would you feel if I called it this?
• 30:08
  Cushla: I'm gonna put a T at the start of it, so The Isle Woman rather than actually just Hine-Ruru, which is the goddess." And I told them what had happened, and they said, "Well, obviously, um, it was there for healing for you." And- Mm. And I said, "Oh, I feel really strongly about this. I don't know why. I don't know anything about this goddess at all." I worked a lot with Irish goddesses.
• 30:32
  Cushla: So, um, I called it Te Henua Ruru, and you know what I found out maybe four or five years later?
• 30:38
  Cushla: I had a lovely, um, Maori lady client come in, and she said, "Oh, I, we just had this guy up in, um, her marae, and, um, he said that Henua Ruru is the kaitiaki of this area of land here." Wow.
• 30:53
  Cushla: And I went, wow.
• 30:54
  Cushla: I… So she was just speaking to, I guess, whoever would listen, which was me.
• 31:00
  Cushla: Um- And, um, and, and so she comes in.
• 31:04
  Cushla: She's… You know, I've tried to do a couple of, um, workshops with her with the owl, but she never wants to be seen.
• 31:13
  Cushla: She kind of, like, sits around the background, I feel, and just makes sure that I'm doing everything okay, and, you know, like that kind of really grandma energy.
• 31:23
  Cushla: Mm. And one time, it, which reminded me why I was speaking about that, she, um, I was making that, that womb on the land, and two ruru, it wasn't even that dark, um, it was just on dusk, two ruru came and sat on the fence post, like at the other side of the field.
• 31:43
  Cushla: And I went, oh my God, that's just crazy.
• 31:44
  Cushla: I've never seen two ruru in my life.
• 31:48
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 31:48
  Tracy: Some people have never seen any.
• 31:49
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 31:50
  Cushla: I have seen them c- one comes and sits on our, um, on a washing line fence post, actually.
• 31:56
  Cushla: The washing line post.
• 31:57
  Cushla: She sort of sits there.
• 31:59
  Cushla: But yeah, um, just I, I feel really like that she's guiding a lot.
• 32:05
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 32:05
  Cushla: And when I was doing the, um, moon mother and moon daughter circles, I set it up as mothers and daughters coming, and I got a very, very strong message to say, "You need to bring in the third generation, the grandmother." And at that time, I didn't know the science behind that.
• 32:21
  Cushla: Only found out that later that, you know, we all sit in our grandmother's womb.
• 32:28
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 32:29
  Cushla: Um, that when we're the egg in our mother's belly.
• 32:32
  Cushla: Yeah, so really interesting stuff when you trust and believe and open yourself up to these beautiful experiences and-
• 32:43
  Tracy: Exactly.
• 32:43
  Tracy: It's magic, isn't it?
• 32:44
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 32:45
  Cushla: Really magic.
• 32:46
  Cushla: Quite magic.
• 32:46
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 32:46
  Tracy: And listening to nature and letting the, the ruru, and the bees, and the kawakawa, and the ocean all speak to you and, and whatever else is, um… I had that with, at the immersion in Rotorua just recently.
• 33:03
  Tracy: 'Cause n- normally I have my little dog, as you know, Lacey, who's part of the work that I do, and, um, obviously she wasn't there at the immersion with me.
• 33:12
  Tracy: But a cat came into the hotel- And he, I was up at, uh, like 4:00 in the morning 'cause I was preparing a space.
• 33:22
  Tracy: The field said, "Go downstairs." So I went downstairs, and this cat followed me in.
• 33:27
  Tracy: And he… And I had set up the circle for 60 people and, and, and he s- went and sat on my chair, not knowing that that was w- the space that I would be sitting in.
• 33:37
  Tracy: And 'cause it walked around follow, talking to me to start with, "Meow." And I was like- … "Just need you to hold s- some space for me.
• 33:44
  Tracy: Can it c- can… 'Cause you, I need to be able to listen." Yes.
• 33:47
  Tracy: So he wandered off and sat on my chair-
• 33:50
  Cushla: Wow… Tracy: and held the space with me.
• 33:51
  Cushla: It was so beautiful.
• 33:52
  Cushla: Mm. So just having that calling in of nature, you know.
• 33:57
  Cushla: We're in quite a corporate- Yes … environment.
• 34:00
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 34:00
  Tracy: Um, and then to have nature come into us was so beautiful.
• 34:05
  Cushla: And that kinda blows me away as well.
• 34:07
  Cushla: You know, when you think about what we as a collective, as humans, have done to nature.
• 34:12
  Cushla: Mm. And yet they're still, uh, you know, want to support us, and, like, they're very warm, open-hearted.
• 34:20
  Cushla: Like, they have a lot of love for us as a- Mm … as a species sharing this earth, you know?
• 34:25
  Cushla: I think that kind of, that always touches me that, that, you know, we can treat it so horribly, and then, and yet they still wanna come in and help us.
• 34:36
  Tracy: So much we can learn, right?
• 34:38
  Cushla: I know.
• 34:39
  Cushla: And,
• 34:39
  Tracy: and you know, Hellinger talks about it all comes back to love.
• 34:42
  Tracy: And when you look at that, what you were just saying- Mm … it all comes back to that frequency-
• 34:48
  Cushla: Of love, yeah … right,
• 34:48
  Tracy: of love.
• 34:49
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 34:49
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 34:50
  Tracy: Well, we call it love.
• 34:51
  Tracy: They, they wouldn't.
• 34:52
  Tracy: They- Have a different
• 34:53
  Cushla: name for it.
• 34:54
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 34:54
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 34:54
  Cushla: Yeah, yeah.
• 34:55
  Tracy: Oneness, whatever.
• 34:57
  Tracy: Yes.
• 34:57
  Tracy: So many different names for it, right?
• 34:59
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 35:00
  Cushla: Mm.
• 35:02
  Tracy: Beautiful.
• 35:03
  Tracy: So what have you got coming up?
• 35:04
  Tracy: Let's share a little bit about that with the listeners and the viewers.
• 35:08
  Tracy: What is, what's on your plate?
• 35:10
  Cushla: Um, uh, like I said, I'm really, really immersed in the menopausal womb and just providing a space for women to explore that.
• 35:22
  Cushla: Mm. What's, what's happened in their, in the womb space before now as it comes to, like, the end of that huge fertility, you know.
• 35:35
  Cushla: So you're coming to a big ending, and- I kind of, um, you know, if you think about the blood mysteries and those stages of life, this is your third one.
• 35:47
  Cushla: The next one is, you know, elderhood and then death.
• 35:50
  Cushla: So it's a really pivotal point for women, I think, this stage, that, you know, it's now or never really.
• 35:58
  Cushla: So holding the space for that, the change in identities.
• 36:02
  Cushla: And I have a program, um, that I'm offering over eight weeks for those who perhaps can't get to the retreat and have that time and space over a weekend for themselves, and that's one-on-one.
• 36:14
  Cushla: So, um, that incorporates all of my modalities, but it's really targeted rather than, you know, the retreat space is a very much a group energy.
• 36:24
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 36:24
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 36:25
  Cushla: Um, this is really targeted, so we'll, you know, spend the first, um, little bit of time, you know, identifying what's going on, what you need help with, what you need support with.
• 36:35
  Cushla: Um-
• 36:36
  Tracy: Is that online or in person, or?
• 36:37
  Cushla: Yeah, that's online and in person, so I can do it both ways.
• 36:41
  Cushla: So I've worked o- out a way to do it both ways.
• 36:44
  Cushla: And just some really easy practices for women to do at home, in the office, in the toilet, you know, wherever they can, um, just to support themselves, that, that they can carry through after the eight weeks so they have something, um- Mm-hmm … that's really valuable and supportive after that eight weeks of being with a guide and helping them through.
• 37:01
  Cushla: Um, a little bit of EFT in that as well, which is a very beautiful modality, um, around the beliefs and emotions that come up at that time of life.
• 37:18
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 37:19
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 37:19
  Cushla: And I
• 37:20
  Tracy: kind of- So you're sort of like a, a menopausal
• 37:23
  Cushla: doula.
• 37:23
  Cushla: Yeah, maybe, yeah.
• 37:24
  Cushla: I don't think we got a word yet, but that's a good a word as any for us.
• 37:29
  Cushla: Exactly,
• 37:30
  Tracy: yeah.
• 37:31
  Tracy: Fantastic.
• 37:32
  Tracy: That's so good.
• 37:33
  Tracy: So needed.
• 37:33
  Tracy: It was so
• 37:33
  Cushla: funny because when you, when you invited me on, I was like going, "Oh, I wonder," 'cause I know I love some of the family co- the constellations you've done recently online.
• 37:42
  Cushla: I mean, one was your heart's desire.
• 37:44
  Cushla: Mm-hmm.
• 37:44
  Cushla: I love that one.
• 37:46
  Cushla: And the other one was, was it, um, belonging, order, balance?
• 37:50
  Cushla: Is that what it's called?
• 37:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 37:51
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 37:52
  Cushla: And I was thinking, oh, imagine if she did a constellation for the menopausal womb.
• 37:57
  Cushla: Mm. Wouldn't that be wonderful?
• 37:58
  Cushla: Or just your womb space in general.
• 38:00
  Cushla: That would be really- Well,
• 38:01
  Tracy: I, yeah.
• 38:02
  Tracy: Well, there's, uh, there's stuff coming.
• 38:04
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 38:05
  Tracy: So you're on the right track-
• 38:06
  Cushla: Beautiful … um,
• 38:07
  Tracy: w- with the journey that I'm on at, right at this minute, and it's been leading to me to this for a very long time.
• 38:12
  Tracy: And, um, well, around all sorts of things really that's all involved in all of that sphere of things.
• 38:18
  Tracy: Mm. So yeah.
• 38:20
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 38:21
  Cushla: Watch
• 38:21
  Tracy: this space.
• 38:22
  Cushla: Yeah, sounds good.
• 38:24
  Tracy: Oh, beautiful.
• 38:25
  Tracy: So if someone wanted to find you, I know, I know that we will put the link in and we'll-
• 38:30
  Cushla: Yes… Tracy: collaborate on, in sharing this.
• 38:34
  Cushla: Yep.
• 38:34
  Tracy: Um, how would someone be able to find you if they were listening to this now and wanted to find you?
• 38:40
  Cushla: Yes, so my website is www.tehineruru.com, and Tehine Ruru is spelt T-E-H-I-N-E-R-U-R-U.
• 38:52
  Tracy: So R-U-R-U.
• 38:53
  Cushla: Yeah, sorry.
• 38:54
  Cushla: It's my
• 38:54
  Tracy: accent.
• 38:55
  Tracy: That's all right.
• 38:56
  Tracy: I was just being clear on that for myself.
• 38:58
  Cushla: Thank you.
• 38:59
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 38:59
  Cushla: Thank you for that.
• 39:00
  Cushla: Clear on it for your listeners as well.
• 39:02
  Cushla: Yeah.
• 39:03
  Tracy: Oh, it's been a pleasure.
• 39:04
  Tracy: Mm. Utmost pleasure to have this conversation with you today, Khushla.
• 39:08
  Tracy: Really lovely.
• 39:08
  Tracy: I love spending time in your, in your presence.
• 39:10
  Tracy: Mm. I think there's a definitely a kinship there, so.
• 39:14
  Tracy: Mm. Uh, so yeah, if anyone's interested in taking this beautiful journey with Khushla, I can highly recommend, um, the space that she holds and I don't… And you won't regret it.
• 39:26
  Tracy: That is, that's my recommendation, so.
• 39:29
  Cushla: Thank you, Tracey.
• 39:30
  Cushla: You're very generous.
• 39:30
  Cushla: You're welcome.
• 39:31
  Cushla: You're welcome.
• 39:32
  Tracy: Thank you.
• 39:34
  Tracy: Thank you for listening.
• 39:36
  Tracy: Head over to Instagram and tell me what's resonated for you with this episode.
• 39:40
  Tracy: You'll find me at tracey.cartwright.
• 39:44
  Tracy: That's Tracey with no E .cartwright.
• 39:47
  Tracy: And, or head over to my website traceycartwright.co.nz, and receive a free audio with a gift from your ancestors.
• 39:56
  Tracy: So until next time, be kind to yourself and have fun doing it.