Latest / Black Girl Interrupted Podcast / Suicide.....The purposeful act of taking one's life

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Suicide.....The purposeful act of taking one's life · Black Girl Interrupted Podcast

0:36
Speaker 1: What's up, what's up, what's up? Hey everybody, y'all already
0:39
know who it is. It's your favorite girl from the
0:42
504 bringing you another episode of Black Girl Interrupted Podcast.
0:48
Happy Wednesday. Excuse me. I hope everyone is having an
0:54
amazing day. I hope everyone is having an amazing week
0:58
thus far. Yes, it's only Wednesday. It is hump day,
1:01
but we're two days away from the weekend, so Y'all
1:05
know I have to check in with my people. Make
1:07
sure y'all good over here. Let me first apologize. Let
1:11
me start off by apologizing by not doing a show
1:16
last week. So just to kind of give y'all a
1:21
little bit about what's going on. So I will be
1:26
on a internet radio station. Um, so I've been having
1:31
to do things for the internet radio station and unfortunately
1:35
it is conflicting with the times, um, that I'm going
1:39
to do my podcast. So, um, just to make it
1:42
fair for y'all as well as for me, um, I
1:47
may just do only on Wednesdays, um, unless there's something big, um,
1:53
major that I need to jump on on Tuesday. So
1:56
I think I'm just going to scale back. to maybe
1:59
just doing one day a week until we get everything finalized,
2:02
excuse me, with the internet radio station, which is launching
2:07
January 1st of 2027. And I'm so excited. So I
2:12
can't wait for you guys to get the final product
2:16
and hopefully y'all are tuning in and support your girl
2:19
that's going to be on this internet radio station. But again,
2:23
happy Wednesday. I hope everyone is having an amazing day.
2:27
For those that are new to Black Girl, Interrupted Podcast,
2:31
excuse me, I love to do mental health check-ins. Hence,
2:36
September is National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. But anyone that
2:40
is familiar with the show, you guys know that I
2:43
do mental health check-ins at the start of every show.
2:46
And again, I do this because I need to make
2:48
sure y'all are good. I want to make sure that
2:50
you're okay. I want to check in with you mentally.
2:52
I want to check in with you emotionally. and make
2:56
sure you're good because the way that the suicide rate
3:02
is increasing in the Black community, it is imperative that
3:05
we check in with our people, check in with our
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strong friends, and make sure everyone is good. So before
3:11
we get started, again, I always love to play something
3:14
that's inspirational, something motivational, something to keep you encouraged when,
3:20
you know, the times and the days get a little
3:22
low or a little heavy for you. So Before we
3:25
jump into tonight's conversation, here we go. And then we'll
3:28
pick back up right after this.
3:33
Speaker 2: When you feel like giving up, don't. When you thinking
3:39
about giving up, don't. When it look like you ain't
3:45
gonna make it, keep going. When they tell you you can't,
3:51
come on, man.
3:52
Speaker 3: Who are they? When they tell you you're not going
3:57
to make it, don't believe them, man. Don't believe them.
4:01
You got to be relentless.
4:05
Speaker 2: Don't give up.
4:07
Speaker 4: Don't give up.
4:09
Speaker 2: Stay in it.
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Speaker 5: Stay focused.
4:13
Speaker 3: Quitting guarantees the failure. Once you quit, it rules out
4:19
any chance of succeeding. The mere... Waking up every day
4:24
putting the next foot in front of the next foot
4:27
at least keeps you in the game.
4:30
Speaker 6: But you can choose in the midst of all of
4:32
this that's going on to be happy and spite.
4:37
Speaker 7: Of life's challenges.
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Speaker 6: See, a lot of us because of our limited vision
4:41
of ourselves, a lot of us who begin to focus
4:43
on problems and enable them to overwhelm us, we begin
4:46
to think that we have no options. We begin to
4:48
believe that there's no way out.
4:51
Speaker 1: Well, guess what?
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Speaker 6: There's always a way. Where there's a will, there's a way.
4:56
We have two primary choices in life. We can either
4:59
accept conditions as they exist, or we can take the
5:03
responsibility to change them. See, a lot of people want
5:06
to exempt themselves from taking responsibility. All they want to
5:10
do is talk about the problem. Every time you see them,
5:13
they'll tell you their story over and over and over
5:16
and over again.
5:18
Speaker 1: No, no.
5:19
Speaker 6: You wanna take responsibility for your life. I got me here,
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I can get me out of this. And I'm getting out.
5:27
I'm not gonna be a volunteer victim. I'm unstoppable.
5:33
Speaker 8: This will not get me down.
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Speaker 6: You've got to make those kind of declarations to yourself.
5:38
Speaker 5: I have never met anybody who became incredibly successful in
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any area of their life until they had suffered and
5:46
sweated and sacrificed and kept their focus and fought through
5:51
tears and trials and tests. And if you have a
5:54
dream and you commit to it, it will come to pass.
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Speaker 6: You must have patience and engage in consistent action. We
6:06
live in a world, ladies and gentlemen, where people want
6:07
instant gratification.
6:09
Speaker 4: They want it right now. No, it's simple, but it's
6:12
not easy.
6:12
Speaker 6: It's a system that.
6:13
Speaker 8: If you work the system, it works if you work it.
6:16
Speaker 1: But make no mistake about it.
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Speaker 4: It's hard. You are the determining factor.
6:21
Speaker 6: The people that make it in this world look around
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for the circumstances that they want and if they can't
6:25
find them, they create them.
6:27
Speaker 4: It's you that you must take personal responsibility to make
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it happen. It's hard. No easy is not an option. However,
6:33
ladies and gentlemen, what you will discover is that it's
6:37
worth it. write down five reasons.
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Speaker 7: Of why it is worth it for you to become
6:44
a diamond to experience that level of achievement what is
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it that will give you the drive what is it
6:49
that will ignite the courage in you to get up
6:52
and come back again and again and again how is
6:56
it that you would be able what reasons that can
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tap in to that deep down feeling that goes to
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your gut that no matter how many times you get
7:05
knocked down that you're coming back.
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Speaker 8: Listen to me. This is how you do it first
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over six, seven years ago with no money, no human resources,
7:14
no building, no funding, no support. The first thing we
7:18
did was we dreamed. We wrote the dream down. We
7:21
rehearsed the dream. We looked at the dream. We talked
7:24
about the dream. We slept with the dream. We woke
7:27
up to the dream. We wore the dream.
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Speaker 5: And now, boom.
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Speaker 1: It's our reality.
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Speaker 8: And for some of you, you stop dreaming. You dream
7:34
for a week and you stop because things around you
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don't look good. You dream for a month and when
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you get hit in the mouth, you quit and you
7:40
give up. You dream for a while and when people
7:42
tell you crazy, when people tell you stupid, when people
7:45
tell you you can never get done, you stop dreaming
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and you go back to knowledge. And I dare you
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to use your imagination. I dare you when you broke
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to use your imagination. I dare you when you rich
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to use your imagination. I dare you under every single
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circumstance Keep dreaming. Keep looking at your dream. Keep focusing
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on your dream. Keep going after the dream because that's where.
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Speaker 5: True success is.
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Speaker 1: Man, when I tell you, a lot of times when
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I play these videos, a lot of times I feel like,
8:41
you know, I think I'm talking to myself. Those are
8:44
ways that I keep myself encouraged. Excuse me. Those are
8:48
ways that I help to keep others encouraged, even on
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the days that are heavy. Again, this is National Suicide
8:56
Prevention Awareness Month. And anyone that is that is familiar
9:01
with Black Girl Interrupted podcast. You guys know that I
9:05
do these mental health check-ins. A lot of y'all know
9:08
my story. You know, I've attempted suicide seven times, with
9:14
my most recent being just a little over a year.
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And when I tell you, in those moments, you have
9:28
to push through. You have to push through. You have
9:33
to know that you still have purpose. You still have
9:39
to know that I know life gets heavy. And I
9:44
know it feels like the walls are closing in or
9:47
you feel like people don't understand you or you feel
9:50
like people don't hear you. I get it. Oh, I
9:54
got something on my eye. But I just want you
9:58
to know that I see you. I hear you. I understand.
10:02
And most importantly, you're loved and you're needed and you're wanted.
10:08
So I'm not going to take up too much time tonight.
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Your girl is, I am drained, y'all. But I just
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wanted to step in and speak on Suicide, which is
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the purposeful act of taking one's own life. Tonight, I
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really just want to, I don't want my women to
10:37
feel like I don't care because I do. But I
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want to just kind of talk to my fellas a
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little bit tonight, particularly my black men, because suicide is
10:48
on the rise. in our community regarding our Black men.
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And it's not just the older generation. I mean, I'm
10:59
so sorry, the younger generation, but it's the older generation.
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Speaker 9: At 70, 60, 80 years old, 60, 70, 80 years old,
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we have Black men that are committing suicide.
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Speaker 1: Let that sink in for a moment. Again, we have
11:28
our Black men with suicide being the third leading cause
11:33
of death in Black men. And we don't talk about it.
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We don't have these conversations like we're supposed to. We
11:42
don't have these conversations until it's knocking at your door.
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But I advocate and I push And push and push
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and push. And I encourage us to build better. Let
11:58
me say this. To build safer spaces. For us to
12:03
be able to talk in without the judgment. I'm going
12:06
to keep pushing and keep fighting to remove the stigma
12:10
around mental health. Because just because you go to therapy,
12:13
it doesn't mean you're crazy. It just means you need
12:16
someone to assist you in navigating your emotions. I could
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speak to that because it's been 15 months since my
12:35
last suicide attempt. And I can tell you in that moment,
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nothing mattered. No one mattered. I didn't feel like anyone
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could hear me. I didn't feel like anyone could see me.
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I felt like Life would be better if I wasn't
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in it. But to my men, I get it. I
13:06
understand you. I hear you. And I know the world
13:15
doesn't appreciate you. I know the world makes you feel
13:18
like you're less than. I know the world makes you
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feel as if you're nothing. But I want you to
13:25
know that you are something, that you do have purpose here.
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You understand? You are loved.
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Speaker 5: You're heard.
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Speaker 1: I see you. And we're going to walk on this
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journey together. You're not going to be alone. I'm not
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going to leave you by yourself because I've been down
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that road seven times. And I know people say, well, Ashley,
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you know, why do you talk about it? Why do
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you talk about it so much? Because the suicide rate
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is increasing. I don't think y'all understand it has doubled
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since 2024. We're just rounding out the end of 2026
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and the suicide rate is increasing and no one wants
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to have these conversations. No one wants to sit down.
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Nobody wants to talk about it because people are afraid
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because the world has made mental health a stigma in
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the black community. It is, it's made people feel as
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if I can't go talk to anybody because if I do,
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then they're going to think I'm crazy. No, you're not.
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And I'm going to keep saying that. You're not crazy.
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You just need someone to help you navigate your emotions.
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You just need someone to give you the tools to
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make it through. You understand? If you can make it
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through five minutes, you've done amazing. If you can make
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it through 30 minutes, if you can make it through
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an hour, you have done amazing. So don't let people
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out here in this world tell you that you can't
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do this, you can't do that. Yes, you can. I
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want y'all to know you're human first. So humans have emotions.
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So you're entitled to fit what you need to feel.
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I know people say, oh, just suck it up. Just
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push through. It's easy to tell that to people when
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you're not walking in their shoes. Because I hear that.
15:13
I hear people tell me, oh, Ashley, it's going to
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be okay. Just push through. I have been pushing through.
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And sometimes the weight of the world gets heavy on me. So, yes,
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I thought death was the only way that I would
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have some type of peace. And I know people that
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think like that. I've sat down and I've had conversations,
15:37
excuse me, with suicide survivors that have said life has
15:44
made them feel like they're nothing. Life has made them
15:46
feel like they're worthless. Life is life for them. You understand?
15:50
They tried going to therapy and it didn't work. But
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therapy doesn't work unless you put the work into it.
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You understand? The pain, the trauma, whatever has caused you
16:02
to get into that space didn't come overnight. So your
16:05
healing is not going to come overnight. You have to
16:08
stay the course. If you are really truly dedicated to
16:11
taking care of your mental and getting better, you got
16:15
to stick with it. I thought I had it all
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figured out. I thought I could do this on my own.
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I don't need a therapist. Who's going to tell me
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But then when I sat down and I had to
16:28
have those real life conversations, I was like, okay, well, yeah,
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maybe I do need a therapist. You know, maybe I
16:34
do need someone to help me navigate because I see
16:37
that I've been trying to do this and it hasn't
16:41
been working for me. So I advocate and I'm going
16:44
to forever advocate for mental health in the black community. Hey,
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baby brother. Oh, T, I love you, baby. I love
16:53
you so much. I do, I do, I do. And
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I hope you are doing amazing. I hope the family
16:59
is amazing. But I just want people to know that,
17:08
particularly my men, you don't have to carry the weight
17:17
of the world on your shoulders. You don't have to.
17:21
I don't care what society says. I don't care what
17:25
women say. I don't care. But you fellas are human.
17:30
You understand? And you are entitled to feel the way
17:33
that you need to feel. Just because you see a
17:35
man cry doesn't make him soft. It doesn't make him sassy.
17:38
And I've heard that. I've heard that. When are we
17:46
going to stop placing these stigmas Around mental health in
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the black community. Why is it still so taboo? Why
17:55
can't we have these conversations? White people sit around all day.
18:01
In groups. And they talk about. Their mental health. But
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we don't. I get on here. And I see. I
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get on TikTok. Instagram. Facebook. And it's like. It's disgusting
18:22
to me sometimes. Because if I'm telling you that the
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suicide rate has doubled in two years, why are we
18:35
not further having more conversations to figure out what we
18:37
can do to curtail and bring down the suicide rate?
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Because if you could get on here, you could share
18:46
fight videos, you could share this, you could share that.
18:49
Let's have conversations about something that's very pertinent to our community.
18:54
And mental health is one. We don't talk about it enough.
18:58
We don't advocate for it enough. We don't push for
19:00
it enough until it's knocking at the door. And then
19:03
now all of a sudden, you want the love and
19:05
you want the support. We need to have those conversations.
19:10
I know y'all don't want to hear that, but you
19:13
have to. Because you could be sitting next to somebody
19:16
right now that's struggling mentally. And don't have anybody to
19:20
talk to. Like I tell y'all, every time I get
19:25
in front of this camera, it takes 30 seconds for
19:28
you to send a text to somebody to say, hey,
19:30
I'm just thinking about you. I hope you're having an
19:32
amazing day. 30 seconds. You don't know what that does
19:39
to a person. You don't know where they are in
19:42
that moment. That text could change and affect their whole mood.
19:47
It can make them say, okay, Well, somebody's thinking. about
19:50
me today. Somebody's loving on me today. And we need that.
19:54
With everything that's going on in the world, the last
19:57
thing we need is drama. We need peace. So again, please, please, please, please, please, please, please.
20:11
I'm begging you, please take care of your mental health.
20:14
My fellas, my ladies, my young men, my young women,
20:18
my little boys, my little girls, because we're seeing this
20:22
happen far too often and they're getting younger and younger
20:25
by the day. You understand? Seven-year-olds committing suicide, 80-year-olds committing suicide, 45, 52,
20:35
all ages committing suicide because they feel They've done all
20:41
that they can. They feel like they have no help
20:43
out here in the world. So I'm going to keep pushing.
20:48
I'm going to keep advocating. I'm going to keep letting
20:52
my fellas know. It's okay to not be okay. I'm
20:55
going to keep letting my ladies know. Ladies, it's okay
20:58
to not be okay. It's okay to disconnect from the world.
21:01
It's okay to take care of you. Stop apologizing to
21:04
people because you decided to step away and take care
21:07
of yourself. I'm no longer apologizing to people. You understand?
21:11
If I'm going through something and I need a moment,
21:14
I'm going to take a step back. I don't owe
21:16
anybody an explanation. You understand? So that's what I... Stop
21:20
explaining stuff to people. People that really truly love you
21:23
and genuinely care about you, they're going to know, okay,
21:26
he or she is having a moment. Let me give
21:29
them a little bit of breathing room. And then I'm
21:34
going to reach out. Let me let them, you know,
21:37
collectively get their feelings and their emotions together. And then
21:40
I'm going to reach out. Even if I have to
21:41
go over there and I have to sit with you.
21:43
Because I say this all the time. I would rather
21:47
sit on the phone with you while you cry to
21:49
me than for me to be sitting and crying at
21:51
your funeral. You understand? Because a lot of people hold
21:58
stuff in because they don't trust people. Because they've seen
22:02
what people have done to them on Mad Day. So
22:05
people hold this in. And it's like it balls up,
22:08
it balls up, it balls up, it balls up, and
22:10
then it builds, it builds, it builds. And then when
22:12
they finally explode, it's almost kind of like, where did
22:17
that come from? Because this is something that this person
22:21
has been holding in. They've been trying to talk to
22:24
you or they've been trying to talk to people and
22:27
nobody's willing to listen. But we've always been the dumping
22:31
ground for other people. I want y'all to know Stop
22:38
being the dumping ground for others. Stop allowing people to
22:41
drain you till you're on E. Because then what do
22:45
you have left to give to yourself? Nothing. Because you're drained.
22:51
You're exhausted. You have no energy. Because you consistently pour
22:54
it into everybody else, but no one's turned around to
22:57
pour it into you. Now your tank is on E.
23:02
You're running on fumes. You don't know if you're coming
23:06
or going some days. And then you feel defeated. Because
23:12
then you say, well, I've been there for everybody else,
23:14
but no one's showing up for me. This is what
23:19
I mean when I say we have to have more
23:20
safe spaces. We have to have more spaces where we
23:23
sit and we hold time for people. You understand? Because
23:28
if people have held time for you, why can't that
23:31
be reciprocated? Like I tell y'all and I've told y'all
23:40
Anybody that knows me, I'm going to listen to you.
23:45
And I'm going to offer you solutions. Because I want
23:48
you here. I want you to stay here. You still
23:51
have purpose here. Whether you see the purpose in yourself,
23:55
I see it in you. I don't want you sitting
23:58
in a hospital room on a 24-hour guard like I was.
24:04
Because it's not a really good feeling. Because you're stuck
24:06
in a room. They're watching everything that you do. You
24:10
go to the bathroom. They're sitting outside the door. They're
24:13
sitting outside your room door in the hospital. And these
24:18
people determine whether or not you get to go home.
24:25
I remember sitting in that room last year. And they said,
24:30
you have to change clothes. No, ma'am, I don't. I'm
24:32
going home. I'm going home. But Ashley, you I know.
24:41
But I'm going home. And I went home. And I've
24:48
been in therapy consistently ever since. Has it helped me? Absolutely.
24:56
But I've also had to put in the work too.
24:58
Because I don't like those intrusive thoughts. I've learned that
25:04
when things get a little too heavy for me, it's
25:06
okay for me to pull back. It's okay for me
25:08
to go outside. It's okay for me to be by
25:11
myself or self-isolate. It's okay. And I'm not being apologetic.
25:15
I'm not apologizing for that because I'm going to do
25:18
whatever it takes to protect my mental and my peace.
25:23
So as I don't encounter those intrusive thoughts again, because
25:30
if God has spared me seven times, who's to say
25:32
he'll spare me an eight? So I want to encourage
25:43
my fellows, my women, my boys, my girls. I love you.
25:57
I do. And I know what that feels like. I
26:03
get it. To feel alone. To feel like you don't
26:09
have anybody to talk to or you don't have anybody
26:11
to turn to. I get it. I understand. But I
26:19
want you to get up and I want you to
26:21
keep fighting. I want you to push through. I want
26:24
you to know. I want you to dig deep and
26:26
I want you to find purpose. I want you to
26:31
know you're loved. I want you to know you're wanted.
26:33
I want you to know that you're needed. I want
26:35
you to know this. I want you to feel this.
26:38
I want you to understand this. That everything that you're
26:43
going through, you can get through. I don't want you
26:46
to end your life. I don't want you to. Because
26:50
I know you got fighting you. I know you're strong.
26:54
I know you have strength. Excuse me. I know you
26:59
got it in you. If I could fight through the dark,
27:05
I want you to fight too. Even if I got
27:08
to push you into the light. I want you to
27:11
be here. I don't want you to go. I don't
27:13
want you to feel like suicide is the only way out.
27:16
It's not. Stay with me. Let's figure this out together.
27:25
Let's work through this together. Let's cry through this together.
27:29
Let's do whatever it is we got to do to
27:31
make it to the other side. You understand? Because again,
27:34
I don't want you to feel like suicide is the answer.
27:40
I know you want the pain to stop. I know
27:43
you do. I know it hurts. I know it bothers you.
27:48
I know it's heavy. But I want you to talk
27:53
to somebody. I want you to grab somebody. I want
27:56
you to find a safe space, even if that means
27:59
you grabbing a journal and you write down, even if
28:03
it don't, let me tell you something, even if it
28:05
don't make sense to nobody else, as long as it
28:07
makes sense to you. Don't worry about that. Write down
28:10
what you're feeling in the moment. If right now you
28:13
feel like it's dark for you, write, hey, I feel
28:15
like it's dark. Why? Why do you feel like it's
28:17
dark for you? These are things I want you to
28:24
go outside. Come out of your house. Go take a walk.
28:31
Find a place in your mind that's safe. You know,
28:34
I tell this to my daughter. My daughter deals with anxiety.
28:38
And so she has anxiety attacks and I tell her
28:41
all the time, when you get overwhelmed, I need you
28:44
to find a safe space in your mind and go there.
28:51
Only you know what a safe space is. Only you
28:53
know where in your mind is safe for you. I
28:56
need you to go there. But I don't want you
29:02
to leave me. I want you to stay. Don't go.
29:10
I want you to keep fighting. I want you to
29:14
know you bring so much joy to my life. I
29:22
have fun with you. We laugh together. I need you here.
29:31
Who else am I going to argue with? Who else
29:33
am I going to talk noise to? Who else am
29:35
I going to do this and that and the third?
29:37
So I need you here. You understand the way that
29:41
you pushed and you've encouraged me? I'm going to turn
29:43
around and I'm going to push and I'm going to
29:45
encourage you because I want you in the light with me.
29:47
You understand? I want you in a safe space with me.
29:50
I want you at the table with me. I want
29:53
you here with me. I want you to do this
29:54
with me. I want you to do that with me.
29:57
I'm not concerned with what nobody else have to say.
29:59
You understand? Because nobody understands our relationship. No, I'm not
30:06
talking about a specific person. I'm speaking overall in general.
30:09
I'm talking to anybody that's listening. I'm talking to anyone
30:12
that's watching. You bring joy to my life. You understand?
30:16
And how can I continue to have fun if you're gone?
30:25
Let's go sit down and let's go have lunch. Let's
30:28
go brunch. Let's go have dinner. I want to hear you.
30:33
I want to know what can I do to help
30:35
you through the dark. I want to know what can
30:37
I do to help you navigate through this. You understand?
30:40
So yes, I'm going to fight with you. We're going
30:45
to make it through this together. We're going to overcome this.
30:50
We're going to beat this. We're going to beat this.
30:55
You strong. I know you don't feel like you are,
30:59
but baby, you are. You're strong. You know? And like
31:06
I said, let me pull this back up. Looking at
31:09
these statistics. You have. Give me a moment. I want
31:17
to try to move this out of the way so
31:19
y'all could see. These statistics. So you have a crisis
31:30
we can't ignore. You have 53, Black Americans faced a
31:38
53% increase in suicide deaths between 2014 and 2024. I
31:47
just wanted to kind of move so y'all could see
31:51
the screen. A rate that is 10 times more than
31:59
what white Americans are seeing. And twice the rise among
32:04
Latino and Native American groups. And this is from the CDC.
32:15
You have the toll on black men. Let me make
32:20
this a little bigger so y'all can see. There we are.
32:25
I hope y'all can see. So it says the toll
32:28
on black boys and young men is devastating. You have
32:33
those age 16 to 29 are now dying by suicide
32:39
at rates higher than their white peers. While white men
32:47
have nearly, still have nearly doubled the suicide rate overall.
33:05
Then you have the crisis is most severe for black
33:07
men aged 20 to 24. With a suicide rate of 31.9
33:18
per 100,000, the highest among all age groups. This is
33:25
what you see. And then we have our mental professionals
33:30
that are sounding the alarm. They point to a growing
33:34
crisis driven by unresolved trauma, social pressures, and a lack
33:40
of mental health support. That's sad. I want to repeat
33:49
that one more time. Mental health professionals are now sounding
33:54
the alarm. They're pointing to a growing crisis that is
34:00
driven by unresolved trauma, social pressures, and a lack of
34:05
mental health support. This is what we're seeing. This is
34:17
what we're seeing. We're seeing more and more of our
34:25
young men take their lives. More and more. Now I
34:38
ask you, what can we do? We can talk about it.
34:45
Support each other. We have to prioritize our mental health.
34:49
And that's what I tell you guys. Prioritize. And we
34:56
have to build access to care. So when I say
35:01
we need to start having more conversations regarding mental health
35:06
in the black community, that's what we need to do.
35:12
Because we don't support each other. Why not? Why are
35:24
we not sticking together? Why are we not supporting each other?
35:27
Why are we not.
35:30
Creating safe spaces? Why are we not providing resources to
35:36
people in our community that look just like me to
35:38
get access to mental health? I'm not understanding that. The
35:48
funding has been cut for mental health. Why are we
35:54
not encouraging our fellows to get help for that unresolved trauma.
36:06
Why are we not doing that? Why are we not
36:10
encouraging our black men to heal? Why are we not
36:13
encouraging our black boys to heal? Why are we forcing
36:18
these black men and these black boys to carry this weight?
36:22
Why are they not allowed to be human? Why are
36:24
they considered sassy? When they cry. Or when they open up.
36:31
Or when they share. I'm not understanding. We say we
36:41
love the black man. But what are we doing to
36:45
support the black man. Mentally. Oh that's right. Because we're
36:51
too busy telling them. Oh suck it up. You'll be okay.
36:55
Men ain't supposed to cry. Yes they are. They're human.
37:03
Why are those same spaces afforded to women, not afforded
37:07
to men? Why? And then you wonder why they're taking
37:15
themselves out of here. Why are we not doing this?
37:24
Why are we not taking care of one another? Why
37:26
are we not looking... And supporting one another in the
37:30
community when it comes to the mental health. We're losing
37:37
our men at alarming rates. To suicide. Due to the
37:45
lack of resources, due to the lack of support. We
37:54
have to be willing to stand in the gap. I
37:58
get it. I understand. Y'all say black men ain't this
38:02
and black men ain't that. I don't care what y'all say.
38:04
Black men are everything to me. Their mental means everything
38:08
to me. I want to see my brothers heal. I
38:12
want to see my brothers go on and be successful.
38:15
My young men. I look at my own son. He's
38:23
the next generation, you know. I tell my son all
38:28
the time, you don't have to hold everything in. It's
38:33
okay to cry. If you feel some kind of way,
38:37
it's okay to feel what you need to feel. But
38:42
suicide overall, what can we do to help bring those
38:48
numbers down because they're steadily increasing. If they've doubled within
38:56
a 10-year time frame What can we do to curtail that?
39:04
Can we build safer spaces for them? Can we do that?
39:10
Can we listen to them? Can we stop using what
39:13
they tell us against them on mad day? Because this
39:17
is part of the reason why black men don't talk.
39:22
This is part of the reason why they don't say
39:23
things to us. Because we don't make spaces safe for them.
39:27
Because we don't do this for them. We don't do
39:29
that for them. Again, there's a plethora of things out
39:32
here for black women. But what about our men? You understand?
39:36
Our black boys. At 15 years old. At 7 years old.
39:44
At 24 years old. At 32 years old. At 40
39:46
years old. At 45. I've seen it. We've seen it.
39:55
There was a black man, a young man that just
39:58
committed suicide a couple of weeks ago. And the comments, hey, beautiful. Hey, sis.
40:05
I love you, baby. That's my beautiful sister Tawana. But
40:12
I saw a young man, a football player. And the comments.
40:20
That people were making. No he may not have been
40:21
a good person. In life. But how dare y'all sit
40:27
up there and say. You're glad he took his life.
40:33
Let me tell you something. I don't care what this
40:34
man did. In life. Because he's got to deal with
40:38
that in the afterlife. You can't. And it's always. These Christians.
40:46
God says. Judge ye lest ye be judged. You understand.
40:48
You understand. So whatever this man did in life, who
40:53
are we to judge? Because he may have hurt people,
40:59
but he left the family to grieve. You understand? Maybe
41:04
his children, his mother, his father, siblings. You still have
41:08
a family that's grieving. You understand? Still. So I saw
41:14
some of the comments and then I saw some of
41:15
the black men in the comments that said, this is
41:17
one of the reasons why we don't talk. This is
41:20
one of the reasons why we don't say anything because
41:23
this is what we're met with. Stop it. Y'all want
41:31
to sit up here and perpetuate like y'all are just
41:34
these Christians and this, that, and the third. Again, judge
41:37
ye lest ye be judged. Because you may have some
41:43
skeletons in your closet. So again, regardless of what this
41:46
man did, You still have a family that's left grieving.
41:54
You still have a family that's left grieving. And that's
41:56
one of the things that a lot of times we
41:59
don't take into consideration when it comes to suicide. Is
42:03
that there's a family left grieving. You understand? Regardless of
42:07
what kind of monster they were, that's up to God
42:11
to handle that. But it devastated me when I saw
42:17
these black men in these comments that were saying, you know, yeah,
42:22
we know he may have been a bad guy. But
42:25
he still has a family left that's grieving behind him.
42:27
You understand? Again. That's one of the causes of black
42:35
men to commit suicide is unresolved trauma because we don't
42:39
encourage it because we've taught our black men to just
42:42
suppress it and just hold on to it. And then
42:45
the weight of the world gets too heavy for them.
42:47
And guess what? They feel like death is the only
42:49
way out. So they go and they do it. And
42:52
then I hear people say, oh, well, he should have
42:54
reached out. He did. Or she did. You just didn't
42:59
have time. You just didn't have the space. You understand?
43:06
But this person made space for you when you were
43:09
going through your issues. So this is why I tell people.
43:15
I'm always a phone call or a message away if
43:18
you're going through something. Because I'm going to say this
43:20
again and I'm going to keep saying it and keep
43:22
saying it over and over and over and over and
43:23
over again. I would rather sit on the phone with
43:26
you and let's cry together than for me to be
43:28
sitting front row at your funeral as they close the
43:31
lid on your casket. Because I know how heavy life
43:36
can get. I know what that feels like. I know
43:39
what it's like to be in those dark spaces. Again,
43:42
I've attempted suicide seven times. You understand? Seven. Again, my
43:46
most recent was in June of last year. So can't
43:51
nobody sit up here and say, Ashley, you're not even
43:53
qualified to speak about it. Yes, I am. I get
43:58
up here and I advocate. I get up and I
44:00
push the envelope.
44:02
Speaker 8: I push.
44:03
Speaker 1: for us to have these conversations because guess what? Suicide
44:06
could be knocking at your door tomorrow. But we don't
44:12
look at that. We don't look at the fact that
44:15
there are people really truly out here suffering. There are
44:17
people out here that don't have access to the resources
44:20
to get help. But y'all get up here on social
44:26
media and y'all love to drag people and you don't
44:31
know what that person is going through. So I'm learning
44:35
to be mindful of the things that I say to
44:39
people or the way that I interact with people. You understand?
44:41
Because a laugh, a smile, a hug could change anyone's day.
44:46
You understand? It could change their mood. I was in
44:51
Walmart earlier today and this lady walked past me. I say, smile.
44:54
I say, girl, you're too pretty not to smile. And
44:57
she just kind of gave me like a little fake smile.
44:58
I say, I know, girl. I had them days like that, too.
45:04
So I wanted her to feel heard. I wanted her
45:06
to feel seen. I wanted her to know, baby, I understand.
45:10
I get it. I understand. I don't think y'all understood
45:18
what life was like when I was going through when
45:21
my husband was battling cancer and here I am dealing
45:24
with my own health issues and I'm working two jobs.
45:28
It got dark for me. But I had to find
45:34
purpose in that pain. You understand? I had to find,
45:37
you know, I had to understand, you know what? I
45:39
have to be present not only for me, but for
45:41
my husband. I have to not only be present for me,
45:44
but I have to be present for our children. Not
45:46
only do I have to be present for me, but
45:48
I have to be present for our grandchildren. I have
45:53
to be present for my sister circle. You understand? That's
45:57
who I have to be present for. But I also
46:01
sat and took time for Ashley. You understand? You understand?
46:03
That's why I get up here on this podcast and
46:06
I tell y'all what goes on in my life because
46:08
you know what? Someone's going through exactly what I'm going
46:10
through and they are afraid to talk about it. They're
46:14
afraid to have that conversation because you know what y'all do?
46:17
Because on Mad Day, you love throwing that in front of,
46:20
you love throwing that to people. You love throwing that
46:22
up in people's faces, what you've done for them. So
46:27
anybody that has to keep count of what you've done
46:29
for me, baby, I don't even want you in my life.
46:31
You understand? Because, see, me, I love genuinely. I love wholeheartedly.
46:37
I support you a thousand percent because, you know, I've
46:41
been where you are. I'm battling my own health issues
46:46
right now. But you know what? I'm still present for
46:49
the people that need me the most. But don't get
46:53
it twisted, baby, because I do still put Ashley first.
46:57
I do still do that. Because, again, I don't want
47:00
to be sitting in that room again. I don't want
47:04
to be in that space anymore. I don't want to
47:08
be there. Because that was a deep, dark place for me.
47:13
A place that I never thought that I would ever
47:15
be able to get out of. Without the prayer and
47:19
my therapist. Baby, I probably wouldn't be sitting up here
47:24
right now. My sister says we need to let our
47:28
children know. that it's okay for them to open up
47:32
to us. I always tell my boys that they could
47:33
come to me about anything. Absolutely. Because safe spaces is
47:40
what is needed right now. With everything that's going on
47:44
in the world, baby, the last thing we need to
47:46
be worried about is some drama. Because again, suicide is
47:54
on the rise in our community. And I'm going to
47:57
keep doing whatever it is that I could do To
48:00
save one person. If I could provide you the resources.
48:06
To a therapist. Or help you find. I'm going to
48:09
continue to do just that. Because I know what it
48:13
feels like. To feel alone. To feel like you don't
48:18
have anybody. I know. This is why I get up
48:22
here and I do what I do. I don't do
48:25
this because I want to be famous. I don't do
48:27
this because. For likes and views. I do this because
48:31
I want my story to help somebody. You understand? That's
48:36
why I do what I do. I have these conversations
48:42
because I hope to encourage somebody. I hope somebody takes
48:45
something from one of my shows and says, man, Ashley,
48:48
thank you so much for sharing your story. I didn't
48:51
even know your story was my story. You understand? Thank
48:54
you for encouraging me to go seek help. That's the
48:58
reason I do this. I don't do this for likes
49:03
and because I want a million people to follow me.
49:05
I don't care about that. My concern is the health
49:09
and the well-being of the black community and their mental.
49:16
Because we're suffering. Mentally. we're seeing these rates steadily increase
49:29
and y'all want to get on here and tussle about
49:31
political views I don't care your mental matters to me
49:36
I don't care who you voted for Period. Y'all get
49:45
up here and y'all want to tussle about stuff that
49:47
makes zero sense. But you could be sitting right next
49:50
to a person that's one pill away, one drink away,
49:54
one bullet away, one car drive away from ending their life.
50:01
Why you think y'all don't see me post like I
50:03
used to? But I'm always get up here. And I'm
50:13
always push and I'm always advocate for mental health in
50:18
the black community. I'm always speak about my depression. I'm
50:21
always speak about my anxiety. I'm always speak about my
50:24
suicide attempts because again, my story could be helping somebody.
50:32
And that's all I'm in. That's all I'm here to
50:34
do is to help is to encourage is the point
50:37
of somebody is to love on somebody. So to my people,
50:44
if no one has told you today, I love you.
50:47
To my ladies, I think you're beautiful, sweetheart. Hold your
50:52
head up. To my black men, I know it, brother.
50:59
I know they talk about you. I know they try
51:02
to pit us against each other. I know they try
51:04
to say y'all ain't this and y'all ain't that. But
51:07
I say this all the time, baby, y'all black men
51:09
are everything to me. I love everything about y'all. Do
51:15
y'all have some horrible treats? Yeah, y'all do. But so
51:18
do us women. But that will never change my love
51:23
for you. To my women, come on, girl. Get up.
51:31
My fellas, get up. Pick your stuff up. Fight. dig
51:40
deep and find out what it is within yourself that
51:44
will give you purpose to stay. Cause I could probably
51:48
give you 10 of them. Maybe I could. Maybe I could. Again,
52:04
this was not going to be a long show. Y'all
52:05
girl is exhausted, baby. I am so tired. Um, I
52:16
just need to, I just feel like my whole body
52:18
is about to shut down, but that's okay. That's because
52:21
I don't sleep at night because my body hurts so bad.
52:25
But hey, I won't complain because I have breath in
52:28
my body. You understand? So I won't complain. I just
52:32
want these pains to go away. That's it. That's it.
52:37
That's all I want to do. But as we bring
52:41
this to a close, like I said, I wasn't going
52:43
to do a long show tonight. Um, But my final thoughts. Suicide.
52:58
Is that a selfish person's way out? We let life win.
53:14
We let life win. We let the pains of 10
53:20
years ago win. We just want the pain to go away.
53:34
But what can we do as a community, as a people,
53:42
to help bring those numbers down? got to start checking
53:48
in with our people. We have to start being more
53:52
supportive of our people. You understand? We have to encourage
54:00
them to get help, to heal whatever ails them on
54:09
the inside and inside their mind. Because no one wants
54:17
to sit in the front row at your funeral saying,
54:23
cut a shit or water. We don't want to do that.
54:26
We want to help you on this side before it
54:29
gets to that point. Anyone that knows me, you know
54:37
I'm only a phone call or a message away. Call
54:43
me or I'll call you. You want to go sit
54:46
down for lunch? Fine. You need me just to listen
54:50
to you? Okay. You don't want me to say anything?
54:53
No problem. You need to unpack? Okay. You need to yell?
54:59
You need to scream? Okay. I'll just listen. And if
55:08
you got to do it again tomorrow, let's do it
55:10
again tomorrow. I want us to continue to do whatever
55:14
it takes. to get you over the hump. But I'm
55:21
also going to offer you solutions because what I don't
55:24
want you to do is sit and cry about it
55:26
every day. We got to work through it. We got
55:33
to push through it. We got to know we're bigger
55:36
than our depression. We're bigger than our anxiety. We're bigger
55:40
than our bipolar. We're bigger than our schizophrenia. We're bigger
55:43
than our PTSD. We're bigger than our postpartum. We're bigger
55:47
than that. We won't make it through. I just don't
55:57
want you to give up. All right, y'all. So just
56:07
a little, I'm going to start. So thank you to
56:09
everyone that came. So let me say this. Thank you
56:11
to everyone that came out. And supported your girl Saturday
56:14
at our Eat and Shop pop-up shop at the Four
56:19
Point Sheraton West over at Alpha Clay Road. I appreciate
56:23
y'all so much for coming and showing your girls some love.
56:26
Now that I've gotten the editing done, I will upload
56:29
the interviews with some of the local vendors that I
56:34
got to meet. I will upload their interviews. I will
56:38
post their information. So if you ever want to connect
56:40
with them, I will list that. I do want to
56:45
say thank y'all again so much for all the love
56:47
and the support. Again, be on the lookout January 1st
56:51
for Grown Folks Radio. That will be the internet radio
56:55
station that I will be on now. And that will
56:58
be launching January 1st of 2027. I'm so excited about that.
57:05
So I do apologize again from the bottom of my
57:07
heart for not doing it. I don't I think I
57:11
did any shows last week and doing anything yesterday. Again,
57:15
I am now in the process of learning the ins
57:20
and outs of internet radio. So that way, when we
57:23
launch January 1st, it will be smooth. So I'm absolutely,
57:28
absolutely ecstatic about that. It's so many beautiful things that
57:32
are coming into fruition for Black Girl Interrupted podcast. I hope,
57:39
the way y'all support me over here, y'all will support
57:41
me on our new internet radio station. Um, it's a beautiful,
57:51
she says, Hey, Javer says, Hey sis, I hope I'm
57:53
not too late. No, I'm just, uh, kind of wrapping
57:56
up a little bit. Um, just talking about, um, the
58:00
launch of our new internet radio station, um, that will
58:03
be launched in January 1st. Um, I myself will be
58:07
a part of that. It is again called Grown Folks Radio.
58:10
I am so looking forward to it. I cannot wait.
58:16
So we've been kind of fast tracking the training so
58:19
that way I can get familiar with the ins and
58:21
outs of how to record my shows on the days
58:25
that I'm not able to go live. Because again, I
58:27
am still trying to do Black Girl Interrupted podcast as
58:31
well as do Grown Folks Radio and then still work
58:34
my full time job. So It's all about time management
58:37
and I'm going to figure it out. I'm going to
58:39
balance it out because I do want y'all to know
58:41
Black Girl Interrupted is and will always be my baby,
58:45
will always be y'all's baby. But it is time for
58:48
me to elevate. Thank you, beautiful. She says, oh, congratulations. Yes.
58:53
So I'm very excited about it. You know, again, I
58:58
will still be doing the podcast. So that's not going away.
59:01
It's okay. Let me let y'all know that that's not
59:03
going away. It's just I'm venturing out into different opportunities
59:08
that are now presenting themselves. to me. This is something
59:12
that I've been waiting on for a very, very, very
59:15
long time. And now God just feels like it's my
59:18
time to do just that. But we are still going
59:22
to have our conversations over here on Black Girl Interrupted. Baby,
59:25
don't worry about that. It's not going nowhere. I promise you.
59:27
And I've already told them that. you know, that this
59:30
is my niche right over here. But again, expanding and
59:34
going into different avenues is beautiful because it will open
59:37
up more doors for me. I do have some things
59:42
that I am planning for 2027. Once I get everything
59:47
solidified and put down in black and white, I will
59:50
start to share those things with y'all. But I am
59:54
absolutely taking Black Girl Interrupted podcast to another level. And
59:58
I'm so excited for that. Again, this has been a
1:00:02
long time coming. And I knew if I just stayed
1:00:05
the course, those doors and windows of opportunity would open
1:00:09
up for me. So I'm ecstatic about that. Again, I
1:00:14
will give y'all details as the launch date gets closer. Again,
1:00:18
we are slated to launch January the 1st, 2027. Again,
1:00:22
it will be called Grown Folks Radio. Um, I think
1:00:25
for myself, I will probably do my mental Mondays and
1:00:28
wellness Wednesdays over there. Um, and then when I do
1:00:33
my wellness Wednesdays, I'll probably be live over there as
1:00:36
well as over here. Because again, I can't get my
1:00:39
babies over here to short end of the stick. Like
1:00:41
I want y'all to just be with your girl. Um,
1:00:45
but I do want y'all to come over there and
1:00:46
support us on grown folks radio. Um, the things that
1:00:50
we're doing is, is absolutely amazing. Again, I cannot wait
1:00:54
for y'all to see once everything comes together. Um, so yes, I, again,
1:01:00
I do apologize for not being present with y'all last night. Um,
1:01:03
but again, we are wrapping up. Like I said, we
1:01:06
are fast tracking, um, to push the launch of grown
1:01:10
folks radio again, which is slated for January the 1st, 2027. Also, um,
1:01:16
for Black Girl Interrupted. If you guys know any entrepreneurs,
1:01:22
I am still spotlighting Black business owners as well as entrepreneurs. Again,
1:01:29
I will upload my videos from the pop-up shop. I
1:01:32
will upload my interviews. I will post their information in
1:01:35
the comments. So that way, anyone that's in Houston, and
1:01:39
maybe if you're not in Houston, maybe you can still
1:01:41
send some way to support. But if you know anybody
1:01:43
that is a black business owner or an entrepreneur, um,
1:01:47
I would love to bring them on the show. Black girl,
1:01:50
let's run the podcast. Um, I actually have two guests
1:01:54
that will be coming. Uh, one is next Wednesday and
1:01:59
I got to pull up my calendar. Um, but hopefully
1:02:01
y'all tune in, come in and show some love, show
1:02:03
some support, uh, for my, my black business owners y'all.
1:02:07
And again, if you are, I don't care if you're
1:02:09
just starting out. I don't care if you've been doing
1:02:11
this five years, 10 years, 20 years, six months. I
1:02:15
want to talk to you. I want you on Black
1:02:17
Girl Interrupted Podcast because I want you to inspire others
1:02:22
and let's grow your brand. So if you know anybody,
1:02:26
tap in with your girl. The email address is, let
1:02:30
me put it over here. Give me just a moment.
1:02:34
Let me get it back up here. uh, and it
1:02:40
is black girl interrupted podcast, black girl interrupted one at gmail.com. Um,
1:02:47
I'm going to post it real quick and there it is.
1:02:51
There is the email right there. So it is black
1:02:54
girl interrupted one at gmail.com. Um, email me and let
1:02:58
me know if you want to be a guest on
1:03:00
the show. Um, we could, you know, let me know
1:03:02
what day you want to do it. Um, and then
1:03:05
we'll go from there and make it happen and we'll
1:03:07
make beautiful magic together. So That's what Black Girl Interrupted
1:03:12
has going on. So again, I have my hands in
1:03:15
a bunch of things, but I'm excited about this internet
1:03:19
radio station. And shout out to my boy LD for
1:03:22
putting my name in that conversation. Man, thank you, thank you,
1:03:26
thank you. I appreciate you so much, big brother. You
1:03:29
just don't know how much that means to me. So
1:03:34
on that note, I do want to say I love
1:03:37
you guys. I hope you had an amazing, amazing, amazing
1:03:42
week thus far. Again, it is Wednesday. We are rounding
1:03:49
out the end of 2026, rolling into 2027. So as
1:03:53
we bring everything to a close for the end of
1:03:57
the year, I'm going to make a post and I
1:04:00
want y'all to comment. Let me know what are your
1:04:02
goals for 2027? How do you plan to end 2026?
1:04:07
And what do you plan to do in 2027? On
1:04:12
that note, I love you guys. Happy Wednesday. I will
1:04:16
be back. I promise. I don't have anything for next Tuesday,
1:04:19
so I will be live. Um, I think I want
1:04:23
to do my wellness Wednesday, next Wednesday. Um, I want
1:04:27
to talk to y'all, tell y'all what's been going on
1:04:29
with me health wise and where we're going, you know, uh,
1:04:36
it's adjusting. Let me just say that life is, it,
1:04:39
life is adjusting for me. Um, but I'm here for it.
1:04:44
You know, I like my new doctor. Um, I like her. She, she's, she's,
1:04:49
she's the one. And I love the fact that she's being,
1:04:52
being very proactive. So, uh, we'll, we'll tap into, you know,
1:04:56
let's do that next Tuesday. Let's do a Tuesday. So
1:04:58
let's do a talk to me Tuesday. Um, and I'll
1:05:01
share what's been going on, uh, behind the scenes with
1:05:05
me health wise. Um, it ain't nothing bad y'all. I
1:05:10
promise it's not. It's just a lot of things that are,
1:05:13
that are life changing for me that I did not
1:05:15
expect to be, um, having to deal with, you know,
1:05:20
at my 40 plus years on this earth. Um, but
1:05:25
I'm hopeful with this new doctor. I'm, I'm really hopeful. Um,
1:05:29
but on that note, I love y'all. happy Wednesday I
1:05:32
hope you guys have an amazing rest of the week
1:05:35
I hope you have a beautiful weekend um and again
1:05:38
don't forget to like comment share and subscribe uh we'll
1:05:42
be back next Tuesday 8 p.m central time 9 p.m
1:05:44
eastern time uh we're just gonna do talk to me
1:05:48
Tuesday I haven't done that in a while so let's
1:05:50
do that let's catch up I want to know how
1:05:52
everybody you know I want to know how everybody's doing
1:05:54
I know we always get on here and we always
1:05:57
always have a topic um But I really want to
1:06:01
talk to you. I really want to mingle with y'all.
1:06:03
So bring your wine, bring your tea, your water, your coffee,
1:06:06
your coat, whatever it is. Kick your shoes off. And
1:06:09
we just we just going to do what it is
1:06:11
that we got to do. But I love y'all. Have
1:06:14
a beautiful rest of the week and I will see
1:06:15
y'all Tuesday. Holla!