Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / We allow others to make us feel bad

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We allow others to make us feel bad · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the good morning from the chicken coop, podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and master mindset.
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  Coach filled with inspiration, distinctions, perspectives and
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  possibilities. We help you to cultivate a
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  mindset that leads you to create the best version of yourself.
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  You could ever imagine join Kim. Every morning from one of her.
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  Favorite happy places her chicken coop, along with all her
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  chickens. Hey everybody.
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  Good morning from the chicken coop.
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  Eleanor Roosevelt is famous for saying, no one can make you feel
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  inferior without your consent. I mean, think about that for a
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  second. Again, it falls back into our
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  whole, emotional well-being, emotional awareness.
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  And the thought of being aware that nobody has the right to
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  take up, residency in your brain unless you allow them to get
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  into your head and take up residency.
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  And for me I think that, you know, so many of us Us find ways
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  to be critical of ourselves non-stop all day long.
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  I just finished up you know looking through my notes this
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  morning getting ready for speaking to people and for the
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  day and one of the things that I'm going to be dealing with
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  with a few clients coming up. This week is the fact that they
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  are constantly feeling inferior in their workplace.
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  They're feeling like other people look down on them.
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  They feel like when they go in that other people think that
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  They are less than don't give them opportunities.
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  Don't don't look to them for their knowledge but they look to
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  them and criticize them and even silently, which is worse, you
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  know, ignore them or say things about them behind their back,
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  which to me, is just mean, and that's like, mean girls stuff,
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  like just unacceptable as far as I'm concerned, it's
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  unacceptable. And it is never kind to be that
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  person. It is never okay, to be that
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  person. And From a from a very you know
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  fundamental standpoint about allowing someone in your head to
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  pick on you you have to acknowledge that you're actually
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  picking on yourself. What's the reason that you allow
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  this to take place in your head? What's the reason that you have
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  this focus on yourself and being critical of this yourself?
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  What's the outcome that you think you're going to gain by
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  being harsh with yourself? Because in my purse?
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  All you know, reference for that as I've never seen.
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  Somebody do a really great job long-term by beating themselves
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  up. It doesn't work.
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  The beatings will continue until morale.
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  Improves does not work. It didn't work overtime you know
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  Empires were overthrown because of things like that and in your
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  mind it's the same think. I mean can you kick your own ass
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  here and there to get yourself moving?
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  Yes. Okay.
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  But it's not long term. It's a quick.
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  It's a quick thing. It's like a in and out.
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  Like, oh yeah. Aggravated myself, an okay, then
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  I'm able to move on. But when you read a literally
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  abuse yourself that is not okay. It's not going to help you, it's
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  not going to help you move forward.
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  It's not going to get you to where you want to go.
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  And I can promise you that it does more damage than good
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  inside your psyche. When you are abusing yourself,
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  you know, it's been said in the past that if you talk to
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  yourself, like you would talk to a child, you would be a lot
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  Kinder. And I think that While the
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  intent of that common is, is good.
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  I think it's also like, well I don't I'm not a child and I'm
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  not going to talk to myself that, you know, in as I would
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  talk to a child, therefore, I can abuse myself so we can get
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  our work our way around that. But if you do pause and you
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  think to yourself, okay, what's the way?
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  I like someone to treat me. What's the way that lifts me up?
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  What's the way that makes me feel?
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  Like I'm lifted through the process as opposed to beaten up
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  by the process. You will all of sudden.
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  Nuys that you do have ways to influence yourself, you do have
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  ways to make yourself behave the kinder to yourself.
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  You do have ways that make you focus on that piece of yourself
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  that says I'm going to not abuse myself and I'm not going to
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  allow others to abuse me because you can't stop someone else from
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  doing it. When you are doing it.
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  You set the tone. If you allow yourself to abuse
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  yourself, mentally, and talk to yourself in such down, And ways
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  then guess what's going to happen?
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  You're going to allow other people to do it.
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  So if you want your external world to be better, we have to
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  start with ourselves first. And we have to speak, uplifting
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  thoughts to ourselves. We have to speak into the place.
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  We want to be, not into the place that we are, because
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  that's just doesn't work. So, if you can do this with
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  yourself first, your external world starts to change but it
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  requires really requires. Is that you do that work?
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  It really requires that. You say, okay, I am going to
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  focus myself on this without question.
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  I am going to make sure that I no longer abuse myself.
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  Therefore no one else is allowed to do it either.
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  Once you've set the standard, you can live into it.
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  So I want you to really think about this and focus on it
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  because that's how it how you get better.
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  All these little things that we talk about every day.
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  All these little pieces of the puzzle, add up and and make for
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  something. When they're all put together
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  and they're layered on top of each other.
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  So work on this, be kind to yourself and remember the Kinder
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  you are mentally to yourself and the more you ask, the questions
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  that are lifting you up as opposed to putting you down, the
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  better. The external world will because
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  you won't allow anyone else to treat you poorly either.
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  Okay. My friends.
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  I will see you tomorrow. Be kind to yourself by