Latest / Salt of the Earth / Ep 107: The Unbreakable Farmer _ Part B

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Ep 107: The Unbreakable Farmer _ Part B · Salt of the Earth

0:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay, if you can allocate 40 minutes and 23 seconds to yourself, can't then walk into your bathroom and have a good hard look at yourself in the mirror because you're the most important person.
0:20
SPEAKER_01: We're back with Warren Davies for Pat Banny.
0:24
SPEAKER_01: In this episode, we talk about the grieving process after disaster and the reality that for many rural communities, the next disaster is often sitting somewhere in the back of people's minds.
0:38
SPEAKER_01: We talk resilience, capacity, adverse circumstances, and we also check in on Warren himself.
0:46
SPEAKER_01: There's some really practical advice in this episode too.
0:49
SPEAKER_01: Warren says he'll challenge anyone who can't find just 1% of their day to help themselves.
0:57
SPEAKER_01: And we also talk about ways we can better look out for the people around us.
1:01
SPEAKER_01: This one's about building capacity and building hope.
1:06
SPEAKER_01: Here's part B with Warren Davies.
1:12
SPEAKER_00: Everyone's situation's a little bit different, and so recovery is not just because everything looks a little bit normal, but it still doesn't.
1:21
SPEAKER_00: You can rest assured that.
1:22
SPEAKER_00: But just to make people aware that, yeah, just because the road's open again doesn't mean it's over.
1:27
SPEAKER_00: It's this is a long-term thing, and these communities then need supporting longer term, and so it's not a short-term thing.
1:35
SPEAKER_00: And I think making people aware in the cities that this is what's happening and how multiple disasters across a wide uh expanse of Australia can impact then their food food security or you know the security of you know of the nation, basically, they've got to be aware of that.
1:53
SPEAKER_00: But because it's not in the news cycle, you know, well, there's something else going on more interesting overseas, this is still happening just up the road from you.
2:02
SPEAKER_00: And you need to be aware of this because these people are struggling.
2:06
SPEAKER_00: They'll need support longer term.
2:08
SPEAKER_00: By that stage, by the time they're at the end of their recovery, you know, getting some sort of way down the path of recovery, the next disaster will have already hit.
2:17
SPEAKER_00: And that's a reality of living in rural Australia these days.
2:22
SPEAKER_01: Is there one conversation from the road that stayed with you lately?
2:28
SPEAKER_00: There's probably there's a number of them.
2:31
SPEAKER_00: But particularly sitting with that that lady that first day after really tragic circumstances and I don't know who uh what stuck with me was just her I don't know I and I'll use that word, but it's not the right word, but the her resil her resilience, but her capacity to be able to hold her shit together, basically, in adver in the face of adverse circumstances really just blew me away.
3:03
SPEAKER_00: But knowing that that was part of the process, and eventually there'll be somewhere down the track where that'll all fall apart because that's just the progression of these things.
3:12
SPEAKER_00: But that really stuck with me.
3:14
SPEAKER_00: I'm thinking, well, there's not too many other problems in the world.
3:18
SPEAKER_00: Like if you know, you need to I suppose then it makes you reflect on yourself of how you handle situations and you need to make sure that you're a bit calmer or a bit here or there when you're doing it after watching her, like she's modelled behaviour that you just go, I don't know where you got where you got that from.
3:36
SPEAKER_00: Like that's just amazing.
3:37
SPEAKER_00: And and that's multiple times when you're you know, you're walking up and you're seeing people standing just staring at a pile of mangled iron and you're thinking, geez, I don't know how you what's going through your head and how, well then what can I do?
3:53
SPEAKER_00: And there's not much I can do except, you know, as I said, hold space and have that conversation.
3:58
SPEAKER_01: But that that lady you're talking about, she's someone we've got to keep checking on, isn't she?
4:02
SPEAKER_00: Yes, definitely.
4:03
SPEAKER_00: And and this is where, you know, I now have a phone full of phone numbers and text messages get fired out at random times during the day, just checking in on people that I've worked with back in 2018 in droughts in southern Queensland.
4:19
SPEAKER_01: That would go a mile if they get a message from you.
4:21
SPEAKER_00: You just you just all of a sudden, or one lady the other day who said, Why'd you check in on me?
4:26
SPEAKER_00: I said, Because, well, you know, you've been, you know, she was one of the ladies that stood up one of these community hubs, and I said, Because I just was you just popped into my head and I thought I'd reach out and just say, G'day.
4:38
SPEAKER_00: How are you going?
4:38
SPEAKER_00: Like, because I know you've taken on a lot and you're also dealing with your own stuff at the same time.
4:44
SPEAKER_01: Like, which brings me to this.
4:46
SPEAKER_01: I was speaking to one of our listeners during the week.
4:49
SPEAKER_01: He's a big fan of yours, mate.
4:50
SPEAKER_01: He firstly said to ask you, how are you going?
4:53
SPEAKER_00: How am I going?
4:55
SPEAKER_01: It's about time we asked you, mate.
4:56
SPEAKER_00: It's very interesting because I've received three of those text messages just today from people.
5:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, how are you going?
5:02
SPEAKER_00: And I look, I'm going okay.
5:04
SPEAKER_00: Look, I I'll be totally honest with most people, and my wife will um definitely tell you that this is the case.
5:11
SPEAKER_00: It's been a rough journey over the last 15 or 16 weeks.
5:14
SPEAKER_00: It's I've I've taken on a lot, and but that's okay because that's what I do.
5:20
SPEAKER_00: And I've been really, really lucky.
5:21
SPEAKER_00: I've got a friend um who's in her own private practice down in Back of Smarsh, Bonnie, who we worked together a fair bit during the the floods in Rochester.
5:31
SPEAKER_00: Bonnie's been a great support, as in I can debrief with her.
5:35
SPEAKER_00: And I've also been lucky because of the I suppose the support on the ground, I was identified as one of those key supporters.
5:41
SPEAKER_00: So through the Australian Psychologist Society, they are also allocated in that initial six or seven or eight-week period uh psychologists that I could check in with.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: So I was able to download.
5:53
SPEAKER_00: But there has been, you know, I suppose that then it one of the things that becomes frustrating because how can I help, you know, how can you help these people more or how can you help them be seen?
6:04
SPEAKER_00: But then realizing that it is a process, and that's one of the things that you've got to reiterate to these to people that are that are dealing particularly in a disaster, is that it's a process, and it is, and re and probably break the news to them that it is probably at least a two-year process where that you know some people have got unreal real uh expectations that oh we'll be back in a house by Christmas, like it's not gonna happen.
6:32
SPEAKER_00: Just knowing from previous some people will be able to achieve that, but just knowing the processes and the hurdles and the the hiccups and the blocks that get put in front of you that this is not achievable, and it could be a longer term thing, so prepare yourself for that.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: And that's sometimes a psycho psychological thing barrier, like these people, then oh, well, I'm not prepared for that.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: So Laura, how can we build capacity so we can so that's where not just before crisis but during crisis, how can we build that capacity so you come out the other end and you're you're still okay.
7:08
SPEAKER_01: But we don't want you to feel isolated, mate.
7:10
SPEAKER_01: There's lots of people thinking of you.
7:12
SPEAKER_01: This particular listener said there's not a day goes by that he doesn't think of you.
7:16
SPEAKER_01: And he said to me in the same message that he has gone back and listened to our episode with you last year many, many times.
7:24
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
7:24
SPEAKER_01: And it's got him through some tough days.
7:28
SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
7:28
SPEAKER_00: No, I I I appreciate I look, I appreciate, and as I said, I'm really humble, and that's just something that I just can't get my head around because I'm just me.
7:37
SPEAKER_00: And it's just um you probably get me a bit emotional here, mate.
7:41
SPEAKER_00: I'm trying not to be.
7:43
SPEAKER_01: Um You're allowed to be, mate.
7:44
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I know, but it's just something that I do, and it's and it is a passion, and it's born out of that dark, scary place that I got to.
7:51
SPEAKER_00: And I don't want anyone else to have to endure that.
7:53
SPEAKER_00: And I know that's just like that's a fanciful goal.
7:56
SPEAKER_00: I I understand that.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: But like if I can just help someone, and it's really hard to articulate why it drives me so much, but it just does.
8:05
SPEAKER_00: And I think it's just knowing that people like that are out there, and I do know they're out there.
8:11
SPEAKER_01: But you need to be reminded of that something.
8:13
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, sometimes you do, but uh, but it's not why you do it.
8:15
SPEAKER_00: And I think once you've done it long enough, anyway, you don't need you know, gratification or recognition or any of that because you just know I know that doesn't matter what room I speak in, whether there's 10 people or a thousand people in that room, there's gonna be at least one person that's gonna take something away.
8:33
SPEAKER_00: And if not, you know, they'll be able to take something away to help someone that they love.
8:37
SPEAKER_00: And I just know that.
8:38
SPEAKER_00: And that's not being big-headed or anything, that's just I know, you know, and if there's a room that's not, well, then that's a very lucky room.
8:44
SPEAKER_00: So there's always that.
8:45
SPEAKER_00: So, but I'm really humble about what I do, but I know there's those people out there.
8:50
SPEAKER_00: Um, I know and I know that they're there, and that's why I keep doing what I do.
8:53
SPEAKER_00: Not very often I get many likes or, and not that you do it for likes, but likes or comments or that, or on anything I put out on Facebook or on my socials, but then the lady stops me in the main street of a cafe at the cafe yesterday and just wanted to give me a hug and thank me.
9:09
SPEAKER_00: So I'll keep writing as long as I need to and putting stuff out there if it's going to help people.
9:14
SPEAKER_00: And I've heard that time and time again because I've really made an effort to articulate my stuff into words during this disaster, even I'm a buddy professional speaker, mate.
9:27
SPEAKER_00: Sitting in front of a video camera and trying to do something, the camera is the scary shit.
9:31
SPEAKER_00: Um, and but I'm getting encouraged to do more of that, so I write it instead.
9:35
SPEAKER_00: And people have people go, it's like you're it's like you're sitting at my kitchen table and you've read my my brain.
9:43
SPEAKER_00: Whatever you've written tonight was just hit the spot, and I'm going, well, I don't know.
9:46
SPEAKER_00: It's just because what I'm seeing, trying to relate what I'm seeing and hearing it during a day and writing it down and putting it into something that will give some people some hope or inspiration or whatever that is.
9:58
SPEAKER_00: So but I thank anyone that reaches out, like it's yeah, it's pretty cool.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: I did uh overnights on the ABC with Trevor Chappell the other week, and a bloke rang from I don't know where he was, but some random place, and he's so he's listening to overnight radio at three o'clock in the morning.
10:16
SPEAKER_00: So, one mate, you've got to go and get your sleep pattern under control.
10:20
SPEAKER_00: But two, that he's he knew who I was, and I'm thinking, geez, it's like yeah, a bit scary.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: But I'm really lucky because I've got I've got that grounding force, which is my wife and my five kids.
10:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
10:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, that ain't let me get too ahead of myself, so it's all good.
10:37
SPEAKER_01: After we published our episode last year with you, I had lots of different messages, and uh there's one thing that stuck with me, mate.
10:44
SPEAKER_01: And there was a phone call from a fellow who was really struggling.
10:48
SPEAKER_01: He was a mess.
10:49
SPEAKER_01: And he got talking on the phone for half an hour to an hour.
10:53
SPEAKER_01: And I was thinking that's this one thing that Warren would have wanted this one impact he would have wanted to have on one person.
11:01
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
11:01
SPEAKER_01: And I know that you did, you made a huge difference to this fella and still meant.
11:05
SPEAKER_00: But that goes back to those key tools in your toolbox, connection and communication.
11:09
SPEAKER_00: So it's achieved that because he doesn't have to necessarily talk to me, but he's talked to you, and he's so he's made connection, he's communicated, and I can tell you pretty much he would have felt better after that conversation.
11:23
SPEAKER_00: And I that's what I know.
11:24
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, and I don't know if that's what I lacked during when I was, and I probably was, and that was mostly brought on by myself, is having that lack of connection or communicating how I was feeling.
11:37
SPEAKER_00: So for someone that takes that's a big step.
11:40
SPEAKER_00: And so that's what drives me.
11:42
SPEAKER_00: Because if you can, in a 45-minute keynote, and you can get build enough rapport with someone that they're really or a podcast and they're willing to reach out to someone, well, then you've achieved your goal.
11:52
SPEAKER_01: So do you think more people are coming out about mental health now?
11:55
SPEAKER_00: That's an another ripper question, mate.
11:58
SPEAKER_00: You've really put together some powerful ones today.
12:01
SPEAKER_00: It's a really like statistics tell us no.
12:04
SPEAKER_00: Really?
12:05
SPEAKER_00: Well, the suicide rate hasn't changed.
12:08
SPEAKER_00: You know, hospitalizations from self-harm don't they go up.
12:13
SPEAKER_00: But we do talk about it a lot more and we're a lot freer about talking about it.
12:16
SPEAKER_00: It's probably the you know, the age group that we find ourselves in, maybe a little bit younger than us and older than us, that is still that, you know, there's still that bit of stigma.
12:25
SPEAKER_00: A lot of young people are a lot more willing to talk about their mental health, which is a really good thing.
12:31
SPEAKER_00: But that doesn't mean when shit it really hits the fan that they do still talk.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: Like they're happy to talk about their feelings and all that, but there's still that those statistics still tell us that when when it comes to crunch time, they're not reaching out or asking for help.
12:47
SPEAKER_00: And I know there's all different reasons why someone might take their life as well, but at the same time, it's telling us that there's still a lot of work to be done.
12:56
SPEAKER_00: But we've we've come a long way, like definitely come a long way.
13:00
SPEAKER_00: For people to reach out or even listen to a podcast around mental health and well-being.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: Well, that's that's testament that we've come a long way.
13:08
SPEAKER_00: And be prepared to sit there and be challenged and be made vulnerable and all those sorts of things.
13:14
SPEAKER_00: So we've come a long way.
13:15
SPEAKER_00: Um, we've still got a long way to go though.
13:17
SPEAKER_01: We touched on it before, but how important is purpose during recovery?
13:23
SPEAKER_00: The whole purpose is everything.
13:24
SPEAKER_00: So that's you know, without my clear mission and purpose, I'd still be standing at the gate of my farm thinking, who are who am I?
13:33
SPEAKER_01: That still rocks me, that story.
13:34
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but who am I?
13:35
SPEAKER_00: What am I, you know, and I'm a I'm my dad and I'm a husband and I'm you know, son and brother, all those things, but who am I if I didn't have purpose and I and and a mission to be on.
13:46
SPEAKER_00: So purpose is so, and that was one of the things, so and this is you probably just opened up a can of worms.
13:52
SPEAKER_00: So one of the communities that were heavily impacted, they had a lot of elderly farmers.
13:57
SPEAKER_00: They're either living in a caravan or out of a container, or they still had their houses, but they were stepping outside looking and just going, what do I do today?
14:05
SPEAKER_00: So we tried to then get the farmers together, so work on group projects.
14:11
SPEAKER_00: So we're going to Frank's today and let's work on his job together, not by ourselves together, and then tomorrow we'll go to Bill's.
14:20
SPEAKER_00: And we tried to get them together because though there were some blokes that were reasonably, you know, they were some put it bluntly, they were on a watch list, like they were really struggling.
14:30
SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, the they didn't know how they were going to move forward.
14:34
SPEAKER_00: So trying to bring those people together and give them purpose.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: So they weren't only just achieving their own stuff, they were achieving stuff for other people as well.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: So, you know, they were giving back.
14:46
SPEAKER_00: So all these fluffy feel-good stuff, and it was making them feel better.
14:50
SPEAKER_00: So it didn't change their circumstance, but changed their mood.
14:53
SPEAKER_00: So purpose is so important.
14:55
SPEAKER_00: Once you've lost your purpose, I think you're in a world of hurt.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: So trying to find what that is, and even if that's just simple stuff, you know, what's your purpose?
15:05
SPEAKER_00: I I think I wrote a post last night or the day before.
15:09
SPEAKER_00: You know, say just that ringing up and checking in with someone gives you purpose, right?
15:14
SPEAKER_00: I write for down five names today.
15:16
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna ring five people today and just check in and see.
15:19
SPEAKER_00: It gives you purpose.
15:20
SPEAKER_00: Like you might be still struggling yourself, but at least it gives you purpose for that day.
15:24
SPEAKER_00: If you can't find anything else, find something that's gonna give do something for that day.
15:30
SPEAKER_00: You know, it's really, it's really important.
15:32
SPEAKER_00: And they're what they're the scary things, like with that, you know, tagging that then with resilience is sometimes gets a little bit confused because all right, my purpose is I've got to get in and get my fences done, and you go flat stick.
15:45
SPEAKER_00: The most important asset on your on your farm or in your business or in your family is you, and be you're worried about all this other stuff, and you're not worried about you.
15:54
SPEAKER_00: So it's really important.
15:56
SPEAKER_00: You've got to focus on yourself and your own well-being, and then you know, so don't get resilience and purpose and all that confused, and just keep pushing and pushing until you hit a brick wall.
16:06
SPEAKER_00: You've got to, there are all these little intricate tools you've got to put in place, and one of them is looking after you, checking in with yourself, making sure you're doing some stuff, and something that I keep challenging people with because most people go I'm too busy.
16:20
SPEAKER_00: Can't do that.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: I said, Well, you've got to have a non-negotiable in your day.
16:24
SPEAKER_00: What is it?
16:24
SPEAKER_00: What do you what's something that you just do for yourself every day?
16:27
SPEAKER_00: Haven't got time.
16:28
SPEAKER_00: I said, All right, let's break it down.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: We'll start small.
16:31
SPEAKER_00: Make me a promise, you'll start small tomorrow.
16:33
SPEAKER_00: Allocate 1% every day.
16:36
SPEAKER_00: What's that?
16:37
SPEAKER_00: 14 minutes and 23 seconds.
16:39
SPEAKER_00: And I said, if you can't allocate 14 minutes and 23 seconds to yourself, go in, then walk into your bathroom and have a good hard look at yourself in the mirror because you're the most important person, and you've got to be able to allocate some time to yourself for your own mental health and well-being, not for anyone else, just do that for yourself, and then from there, then start building, and then all of a sudden, well, what you're doing is you're creating a habit and uh something in your day that's routine, and then you can build on it, and all of a sudden, then that non-negotiable is then an hour long in your day.
17:13
SPEAKER_00: And whether that's broken up into three 20-minute sections or whatever that is, but you've got to be able to focus some time on yourself because we get that busy now.
17:22
SPEAKER_00: To be able to fulfill anything in life in your life, you've got to be able to look after yourself first and foremost.
17:29
SPEAKER_01: So 14 minutes and 23 seconds is only one percent of your day.
17:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:33
SPEAKER_01: Where?
17:34
SPEAKER_01: What are the warning signs someone's capacity tank is empty?
17:40
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, you can you can see that, like, well, obviously some of those things, just like your mental health start to appear, anger, frustration, you know, tiredness, not sleeping, loss of motivation, loss of purpose, all those things, there, you know, loss of connection, loss of communication, all those things, you know, not reaching out, getting support, they all add up.
18:04
SPEAKER_00: You know, they might only be just little parts, but you chuck them all in together and it becomes a big problem.
18:10
SPEAKER_00: So, you know, there's all those little things that, and that's when it's really hard is so when someone says, Well, what do we look out for?
18:17
SPEAKER_00: And you go, Well, how long's a piece of string?
18:19
SPEAKER_00: Because they're all big things.
18:21
SPEAKER_00: And, you know, around mental health and well-being, I talk about, you know, the big signs sometimes are, you know, and this is not on every occasion, but are always easy to see someone's angry or they're frustrated or their, you know, behaviour's different, but it's the little things that we've got to look out for.
18:36
SPEAKER_00: They don't turn up to footy training on a Tuesday night, or they haven't come to that meeting where they're normally sitting up the front, they're the most vocal person, or you know, they've sat there and they've just all these little things we've got to pick up on.
18:48
SPEAKER_00: There are the signs that people are just running out of capacity to be able to move forward to the next step because they've completely depleted.
18:58
SPEAKER_00: So we've got to be able to build build those toolboxes back up.
19:01
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
19:02
SPEAKER_00: And it and it is a process.
19:04
SPEAKER_00: And for me, it's been a it's a long when I look back, it's some of it's been a really long process, but you just got to keep aiming each day to try and well, but what can I do to try and navigate tomorrow better than I did today?
19:18
SPEAKER_01: Have you seen communities recovering really well?
19:21
SPEAKER_00: Yep.
19:22
SPEAKER_00: So I think the communities that are that recover really well are those ones that, or we use that word community-led recovery, but it's really community-enabled recovery.
19:33
SPEAKER_00: If I use the the Ruffie model, where you know they clearly work out what they want, you know, and how they're going to recover.
19:42
SPEAKER_00: And regardless of the outside influences, this is how we want to recover.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: As a community.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: As a community.
19:48
SPEAKER_00: Um, and then that flows back to individuals as well through.
19:52
SPEAKER_00: But I think at their uh having some of these tools, so well connected, well, you know, communities are always, you know, are always going to recover better.
20:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, that doesn't mean that they don't fracture when stress hits, but well-connected communities.
20:06
SPEAKER_00: And I go back to say the floods back in 2022 in Rochester, you know, if you were connected to the footy club, that was a big head start in your recovery because there was your community.
20:17
SPEAKER_00: You were already hooked in, people had each other's back.
20:21
SPEAKER_00: If you're on the fringe of those, of the footy club or whatever, or you've never been involved when they tried to invite you in, so they were offering free memberships and that just to get everyone like together.
20:31
SPEAKER_00: So communities that have got capacity or in their toolbox always recover a lot more quicker.
20:37
SPEAKER_00: But that doesn't mean that they don't have their ups and downs as well and face their challenges.
20:41
SPEAKER_00: But so I think that's why it's important why I sat down back in December is building that capacity before crisis.
20:48
SPEAKER_00: So when crisis does hit, you've got, you know, that toolbox, or in the community sense, you've got that trailer parked in a shed somewhere that you can just pull out and unfold, and there it is with all the tools that you need.
21:01
SPEAKER_00: It's about building capacity before crisis, is the is the, I suppose, the key.
21:06
SPEAKER_00: But obviously, with what's happened, there's also those opportunities during and after to build those tools and strategies as well.
21:14
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, communities that are well connected, they communicate, they've got, you know, clear goals, they're led by, you know, not just a handful of people, but the whole community gets involved.
21:26
SPEAKER_00: Um, they're the ones that really thrive, I think.
21:29
SPEAKER_00: But having said that, it's, you know, every every community of them faces its challenges in their recovery.
21:35
SPEAKER_01: And mate, if someone's listening to this and they're feeling a bit overwhelmed, what's one small thing they could do perhaps this week or even today?
21:44
SPEAKER_00: Well, one of the things that I like I do is I talk about having, you know, knowing you your positive triggers, your negative triggers, your stresses and your challenges.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: You've got to identify them.
21:55
SPEAKER_00: You can't just say, well, I'm really stressed.
21:57
SPEAKER_00: Well, what are you really stressed about?
21:59
SPEAKER_00: What's your challenge?
22:00
SPEAKER_00: But have them articulated somehow, like whether it's on your phone or you've got a list or journal them.
22:06
SPEAKER_00: Or, you know, one of the things I was thinking about talking about facing the camera is maybe journaling some of what I do face to camera.
22:15
SPEAKER_00: So and then making, you know, being able to share that with people.
22:19
SPEAKER_00: So however you do that, kind of yeah, get an idea of, you know, your your stresses, your challenges, your negative triggers, and your positive triggers.
22:28
SPEAKER_00: But that's where your positive triggers list comes really important.
22:31
SPEAKER_00: So what what are the things that light you up that you could do?
22:35
SPEAKER_00: So if you're having a really bad day, you're totally overwhelmed.
22:38
SPEAKER_00: What are some of the things that you can do that light you up that could change your mood?
22:43
SPEAKER_00: Like at a click of a finger, or might not be a click of a finger, but generally, and maybe that's going for a walk, or listening to a song, or listening to some comedy, or playing with the grandkids, or taking your dog for a walk, whatever it is, just know what those things are so you can implement one of those tools to be able to change your day.
23:05
SPEAKER_00: And there's obviously breathing and all that sort of stuff, and you know, sit quietly and you know take some time.
23:11
SPEAKER_00: One of the things is just walk away.
23:15
SPEAKER_00: You know, take some time.
23:16
SPEAKER_00: If something's really you keep hitting your head against a brick wall, or step back, walk around, take a few deep breaths, and when you come back to that brick wall, you might be able to walk straight through it too.
23:27
SPEAKER_00: Like it's just, but while you're there belting your head against it, it's just continually, continually.
23:31
SPEAKER_00: So step away, take a new perspective on it, and then have a go again.
23:36
SPEAKER_00: So just simple little strategies like that are really important, you know, in being able to reframe your day if you're having a crap day.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: Now, having said that, I've got to practice some of the stuff that I preach too because some days become very overwhelming for me.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: And I've I've got better over the years of identifying that and then being able to do that.
24:00
SPEAKER_00: But some when things are really stressful, and it is hard, and that's the thing why we've got to continually practice all this stuff.
24:08
SPEAKER_00: Because it's not easy.
24:10
SPEAKER_00: It's not easy to have conversations around how you're feeling, be vulnerable with people that you might not know, you know, put it all out there on the table.
24:19
SPEAKER_00: It's not easy, it's bloody hard.
24:21
SPEAKER_00: But we've got to keep practicing it, and keep the more practice you get, the better you get at it, and being able to have conversations or identifying if you're struggling, what tools can I implement and just keep practicing, practicing, practicing, and it gets with practice, you get better.
24:35
SPEAKER_00: You know, after a while, those overwhelming situations kind of dissipate a little bit because you've got some stuff in place, and and it's really hard because that when you talk about that, it sounds like you're belittling someone who's really struggling, and I know what that's like, but it is, it's just little simple things, and whether that's picking up the phone and having a talk or just walking outside and walking down the street and then surround yourself with some people, just all little things, they're just little things that could change.
25:05
SPEAKER_01: That walking away bit, I think is pretty powerful because sometimes you don't know what's niggling at you deep down, yeah.
25:11
SPEAKER_01: And and it just step away, have a look back, yeah.
25:15
SPEAKER_01: And you go, oh, that's it.
25:16
SPEAKER_01: Now I can work on that.
25:17
SPEAKER_01: And it might be something that you can't talk to anyone about.
25:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
25:20
SPEAKER_01: It might be someone's confided in you about something and you're you're bottling this up.
25:24
SPEAKER_01: But if you can go for a walk, do something a little bit different, have some purpose, then come back and think about it and go, right, what do we need to do?
25:35
SPEAKER_00: But it's like in my unbreakable wheel of well-being, there's one of the spokes is your environment.
25:39
SPEAKER_00: And it's like you might be sitting somewhere, like I know when I'm not on the road, I'm in my home office, and you can get really bong down, and then all of a sudden, instead of smashing out emails, you're going from one screen to the other, and nothing's getting done.
25:53
SPEAKER_00: Well, picking yourself up and maybe folding the laptop up and going sitting in the park or out in the sun or something, all of a sudden, then you realise in 10 minutes you've smashed out, you know, 10 emails because you've just changed your environment, giving you a different out like you've got a bit of sun on your face or whatever.
26:08
SPEAKER_00: It's just simple little things that we need to just so get a gain a new perspective.
26:14
SPEAKER_00: You know, you can't just keep sitting there going bang, bang, bang, bang, and expect something different.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: You've got to be able to implement something and stepping back, breathing, taking some time away, go make yourself a cup of tea, whatever it is, and just then go back and go, right, I'll take a fresh look at this and go again.
26:33
SPEAKER_01: Perhaps they could listen to a podcast.
26:35
SPEAKER_00: Maybe there's a couple of good ones going around.
26:38
SPEAKER_01: Well, mate, I've recently had a really good podcast with you on it.
26:41
SPEAKER_01: That was with the life of Brian, Brian Taylor and Harrison Taylor.
26:44
SPEAKER_01: Awesome, mate.
26:45
SPEAKER_01: Well done.
26:46
SPEAKER_01: How was that?
26:46
SPEAKER_00: That was pretty, yeah, that was pretty surreal because as a kid growing up in Melbourne, like I'm a Richmond supporter, and you know, it was yeah, having having a chat with BT was pretty surreal.
26:58
SPEAKER_00: It was uh still I I I hate all these things in my life because you look back and go, geez, that was big, but you when you're in it, you just got to do it.
27:07
SPEAKER_00: Now I look back and I think, geez, that was pretty cool.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: Like that's you know, and you don't want to big note yourself, but that's pretty cool.
27:13
SPEAKER_00: Like sit there and talk with BT and you know, and I I had blokes message me after that, you know, didn't know that part of my story, I didn't know I played footy there or whatever, and you go, and just a different audience heard what I would talk about, but that was pretty cool.
27:28
SPEAKER_00: Like it was it was um a bit of a surreal experience, so a bit of a fanboy, so yeah.
27:34
SPEAKER_01: That was a a great chat, and Harrison, you know, asked some really good questions as well.
27:38
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, he's pretty good.
27:39
SPEAKER_00: Harrison's good at what he does, and um he did ask some good questions, and and obviously there has been some good feedback from that, so which is and and that's probably just tapping into a different audience as well.
27:50
SPEAKER_00: So it's been pretty cool.
27:51
SPEAKER_01: Well, I've got some good questions for you now, mate.
27:53
SPEAKER_01: It's the off the wall questions.
27:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, are you ready?
27:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you better better fire them at me.
27:58
SPEAKER_01: What's the strangest thing you've eaten on the road lately?
28:02
SPEAKER_00: Strangest thing.
28:04
SPEAKER_00: Or best thing?
28:05
SPEAKER_00: The best thing.
28:06
SPEAKER_00: Uh the other day I just had a hankering for a Chico roll.
28:10
SPEAKER_00: So that that was that was that was yeah, that was pretty fulfilling.
28:14
SPEAKER_00: It's a bit of a trap when you're driving around in a car with a boot full of shortbread as well.
28:19
SPEAKER_00: That's not that's not that's not good, mate.
28:21
SPEAKER_01: Well, tell me about my gift here, mate.
28:23
SPEAKER_01: I love it.
28:23
SPEAKER_01: We've got a box of shortbread.
28:25
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so the um the shortbread will, and as I said, it is dangerous because especially on a long trip, you need a bit of sugar, and all of a sudden back to Wadonga.
28:34
SPEAKER_00: That's how I'm sure they'll be gone by the time you get to Wadonga, mate.
28:38
SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, so yeah, Bill Quayley owns um the Yarrow Valley shortbread company, also owns Byron Bay Cookies and um a number of other companies that are all, you know, they but they do pasta and all sorts of things.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: Anyway, you come up to me after an event and said, uh, look, I love what you do.
28:57
SPEAKER_00: I haven't got money, but I've got a lot of shortbread.
28:59
SPEAKER_00: Um, and I'd love to give you able to give you some.
29:02
SPEAKER_00: And I then turn that gen.
29:04
SPEAKER_00: I had a really good think about it and thought, oh, this is something that's never happened to me before.
29:09
SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, no one's ever offered me stuff like this, and I think I've got to turn this into something.
29:15
SPEAKER_00: So I turned his generosity into a project, which is my unbreakable conversation project, and use these shortbreads as an icebreaker to conversation.
29:24
SPEAKER_00: You know, if you haven't caught up, I give them as a gift to people at my talks or when I'm driving up driveways.
29:31
SPEAKER_00: If you haven't caught up with someone or you need to have a chat with someone, or if you just want to catch up and you need a reason, there it is.
29:38
SPEAKER_00: Just drive up the driveway and say, I've got the short bread, put the kettle on and let's have a cupper.
29:43
SPEAKER_00: Fantastic.
29:44
SPEAKER_00: So it's pretty cool.
29:45
SPEAKER_01: And that's better than you know walking in with perhaps a stubby hole or a pen or something like that.
29:49
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
29:49
SPEAKER_01: It gives you purpose then to sit down, have a yarn.
29:52
SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
29:52
SPEAKER_00: Or if they don't want to sit down, they can take it to their neighbour or whoever and then have a yeah, have a cupper and a chat.
29:59
SPEAKER_01: You a coffee drinker?
30:01
SPEAKER_00: I I have coffee or tea, so what country town makes the best coffee?
30:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's a good one.
30:07
SPEAKER_00: Well, I I can't go, I can't go to a country town, but it is kind of a country town.
30:12
SPEAKER_00: So in Darwin, there's a coffee shop in Parap called the Lame, it's called Laneway.
30:18
SPEAKER_00: It's a la it's called Lameway, I think, Laneway Cafe, and it's one of the busiest cafes in Darwin.
30:24
SPEAKER_00: Everyone goes there for Brecky.
30:25
SPEAKER_00: They make a really good coffee there.
30:28
SPEAKER_01: I've got fond memories of shenanigans in Mitchell Street.
30:32
SPEAKER_00: Different sort of good.
30:33
SPEAKER_00: I did have a good chat.
30:34
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, David, I'm sure you would have had a good time at shenanigans.
30:36
SPEAKER_00: We actually took my grandson to Darwin to watch the grand final because my son plays footy up in Darwin and lives up there.
30:42
SPEAKER_00: We took my grandson up there, and um and his dad used to um he's at the so this is my younger son.
30:50
SPEAKER_00: My older son used to live in Darwin as well and frequent shenanigans.
30:54
SPEAKER_00: And so I took a picture of of my grandson out the front just for good old time's sake.
31:01
SPEAKER_01: What's your ultimate road trip snack?
31:04
SPEAKER_00: Ultimate road.
31:06
SPEAKER_01: Shortbread.
31:06
SPEAKER_00: Shortbread is obviously I better say that, Bill.
31:09
SPEAKER_00: If you hopefully you're listening, shortbread is that'll do.
31:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
31:13
SPEAKER_00: What song gets the most airplay in the car?
31:15
SPEAKER_00: Uh depends on my day.
31:17
SPEAKER_00: So your mood?
31:18
SPEAKER_00: It depends on my mood.
31:19
SPEAKER_00: So that can change anything from Willie Nelson to bushwhackers to foo fighters to a little bit at the moment.
31:26
SPEAKER_00: I'm a bit obsessed with the Cat Empire.
31:28
SPEAKER_00: I've seen them at up at Wononga, but I've seen them a couple of times.
31:32
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, a bit of Cat Empire.
31:34
SPEAKER_00: But a lot of podcasts as well, I'll yeah, run out.
31:37
SPEAKER_00: I I often message Harrison or Trent Cotchin or these people and say, Or salt of the earth.
31:43
SPEAKER_00: Or salt of the earth, you need to bit more content because I do a lot of K, so chew through them.
31:48
SPEAKER_00: So but it just depends where where I am and what I'm doing.
31:52
SPEAKER_00: And and if it's a long trip, like I went to Dubbo last Saturday, so 15 hours of driving, you chew through a bit of music and podcasts, so some random stuff starts getting played then, which is which is good because I love I love music, got a very eclectic taste to music, so I can listen to anything.
32:09
SPEAKER_01: Like it.
32:10
SPEAKER_01: What's the funniest thing that's happened while traveling lately?
32:13
SPEAKER_00: Funniest thing.
32:14
SPEAKER_00: Oh, it's probably the funniest thing is probably just taking the wrong turn and realise you're heading in the wrong direction.
32:21
SPEAKER_00: That's pretty pretty awesome when you probably really can't afford to lose that 20 minutes of time and you realise you're heading down the wrong road.
32:29
SPEAKER_00: It's a big fear of mine as well, like you're heading to a speaking gig and you're always cutting it fine, and then you really just you keep checking maps to make sure that you're heading in the right direction.
32:38
SPEAKER_01: So you are using Google Maps, not pharma instinct?
32:42
SPEAKER_00: Uh depends.
32:43
SPEAKER_00: Most a lot of roads I know.
32:44
SPEAKER_00: I've travelled a fair bit over the last 10 years, so kind of know my way to most places, and I've got a good sense of direction, so I generally know I'm heading in the right direction.
32:55
SPEAKER_01: Well, if you can magically fix one thing in rural Australia right now, what would it be?
33:01
SPEAKER_01: Geez.
33:04
SPEAKER_00: I suppose this depends what state you're driving in.
33:06
SPEAKER_00: But in Victoria, it's obviously the potholes.
33:10
SPEAKER_00: Sorry about that.
33:11
SPEAKER_00: But I just had to put that in.
33:12
SPEAKER_00: But that's I think most people would say that's a loaded question, mate.
33:16
SPEAKER_00: That's just capacity?
33:18
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, look, just giving people, I suppose, giving people more hope to know that there is a future.
33:24
SPEAKER_00: Like there's a lot of, you know, kids my a my kids' age, you know, the uncertainty of not knowing that they'll ever own a house and stuff like that.
33:32
SPEAKER_00: I think so.
33:33
SPEAKER_00: Building capacity and and hope within our nation that that you know there is a future.
33:41
SPEAKER_00: That uncertainty is really plays a big part, I think, at the moment for everybody, regardless of age.
33:47
SPEAKER_01: That was a real interesting point there before uncertainty.
33:50
SPEAKER_01: What's one thing rural Australians are generally world class at?
33:54
SPEAKER_00: World class.
33:55
SPEAKER_00: Hospitality, making you feel welcome.
33:58
SPEAKER_00: I rock into a town and I feel like I've lived there forever.
34:02
SPEAKER_00: You know, people make you feel welcome.
34:04
SPEAKER_00: You know, everyone's you know, interested in what you do or where you come from and why you're there if they don't already know.
34:12
SPEAKER_00: If they haven't read the flyer or what the event they're at at, you know, they're always interested.
34:16
SPEAKER_00: And then after you've done your talk, they're always even a bit more interested because they've learned a bit more about you, so they ask even more questions.
34:23
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, hospitalities, especially those CWA ladies, they do a great job.
34:29
SPEAKER_01: Well, mate, um, thank you once again.
34:31
SPEAKER_01: You're doing incredible work.
34:33
SPEAKER_01: Pleasure, mate.
34:34
SPEAKER_01: As I said before, I know from our last conversation we had how much of a difference you're making in people's lives.
34:40
SPEAKER_01: As I said, I've personally had phone calls, messages, and seen the impact you've had.
34:46
SPEAKER_01: It's not an easy space you work in, but the way you show up for rural communities, quietly, honestly, and consistently, it really matters.
34:56
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for the kilometres, the conversations had, and the support you continue to give so many people around Australia.
35:03
SPEAKER_00: Oh, mate.
35:04
SPEAKER_00: That's um thank you.
35:06
SPEAKER_00: I really appreciate those kind words, and it's been great having a chat again, mate.
35:10
SPEAKER_00: This is um this is good.
35:11
SPEAKER_00: It's the first time I've ever been on a podcast by, so this is pretty cool.
35:16
SPEAKER_00: So thanks, mate.
35:17
SPEAKER_01: I really appreciate it.
35:18
SPEAKER_01: You're welcome back here anytime.
35:19
SPEAKER_01: Good on you.
35:22
SPEAKER_01: Well, that was part B with Warren David, the unbreakable farmer.
35:26
SPEAKER_01: I really appreciate Warren taking the time to share his insights, experience, and encouragement with us once again.
35:34
SPEAKER_01: If you've got something from this conversation, feel free to share it with someone else who might need it too.
35:42
SPEAKER_01: And again, if this episode raises anything for you personally, please reach out for support.
35:48
SPEAKER_01: Lifeline is available on 13, 11, 14.
35:54
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for listening.
35:55
SPEAKER_01: And please follow us on your podcast app at the end of social media.