Latest / Stuck No More Voices / 347-Karin Thompson: They Counted Coffee Granules to Keep Him Calm

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347-Karin Thompson: They Counted Coffee Granules to Keep Him Calm · Stuck No More Voices

• 0:00
  Speaker: What if the worst thing that happened to you does not get the last word?
• 0:04
  Speaker: Today at the table is a woman who found out it does not.
• 0:08
  Speaker: So welcome back to the Stuck No More Voices podcast.
• 0:11
  Speaker: I'm Theresa Croft.
• 0:12
  Speaker: I'm a visibility strategist who helps Christian women tie their calling to their story that becomes a solution and attracts their ideal audience.
• 0:23
  Speaker: Hey, before we get i- into this too far, be sure to subscribe on YouTube, and if you're listening on a podcast, why don't you share it with someone?
• 0:32
  Speaker: This is how the right women end up in this room.
• 0:35
  Speaker: So this episode, by the way, is a special feature with the Stuck No More Voices podcast.
• 0:40
  Speaker: It's called the Calling Table Sessions.
• 0:43
  Speaker: It's a seat I keep for Christian women whose story deserves to be handled with care and whose voice is ready to be heard.
• 0:51
  Speaker: So pull up a chair and please help me welcome to the table Karen Thompson.
• 0:57
  Speaker: Karen, welcome.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: Hi.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: Hi.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: It's such a pleasure.
• 1:02
  Speaker: Oh, yeah.
• 1:03
  Speaker: So Karen, you write books, you have a newsletter, you do a blog, and you do reels.
• 1:08
  Speaker: I love that.
• 1:09
  Speaker: And you talk about- Jesus and how good He is.
• 1:12
  Speaker: Oh, th- let's just all settle into that.
• 1:14
  Speaker: That is so good.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: And what, what else is there to talk
• 1:16
  Speaker: about other, other- I tell you what, girl.
• 1:19
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 1:19
  Speaker: I mean, to be able to have social media and talk about Jesus is pretty, pretty awesome.
• 1:23
  Speaker: So you come, your story is a, is a painful one, so why don't you- Lead us down that road of coming from an abusive past with your father.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was born into a, a A family where my father, um, he was in the Second World War in, in, uh, Holland.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: Um- Okay they had a lot to do with, with Hitler and because, you know, Germany and Holland are so close together.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: He had a lot of PTSD problems.
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: Um, although at the time I did not know that, but now being older and being open to more information, you s- you sort of can see what was wrong with him, you know.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Um, he, he...
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: I don't know if he had a degree of autism, but he was just not a normal person.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: And he would explode at a, at a, oh, anything.
• 2:11
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: The coffee was too weak, the coffee was too strong, not enough sugar.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: I mean, there was nothing you could do to try and preempt,"Okay, look, you know, don't do this." I mean, we got to the stage, we had a, I had a coffee in South Africa, um, red coffee, where there were granules, and we used to count them out.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: Okay, 20 he seemed happy.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: 21, don't do.
• 2:31
  Speaker: Wow.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: 21 and a half, maybe.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: Because when he erupted, he, he was, it was horrendous.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: He short of killing you.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: He would beat the life out of you.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: It was just so-
• 2:41
  Speaker: Mm
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: so you sort of walked around on tiptoes all the time trying to avoid this.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: Trying to preempt what would make him explode.
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: But then, you know, knowing now, you know a person with PTSD w- and all these type of problems, there's nothing you can do.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: It's, it's a- Yeah it's all in their mind.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: It's the view that's all not working.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: So, so no matter what you right one day, the next day it's not right.
• 3:01
  Speaker: Wow.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: And it was very hard growing up like that.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: Um, I lived in shadows.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: I, I never became a person.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I never, I, I mean, I never had a childhood.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: I grew up as an adult.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: I had to learn how to defend mas- defend myself.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: I had to learn how to, uh, look after myself.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: Um, the whole family was in such tension.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: I have three sisters.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: Um-
• 3:21
  Speaker: Okay
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: no one got on.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: Because everybody ticked him off, and so you were annoyed with everybody,'cause when one person ticked him off, he, we all got it.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: So we all learned to dis- you know, not like each other because,"It's all your fault," you know?
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: And-
• 3:34
  Speaker: Yeah
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: and there was no harmony at, at- Mm at the household.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: So it was a very stressful upbringing.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: Very, very hard.
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: You know, and, and then of course when you leave, you're left with all the, the mindset that you now developed- No doubt which is not gonna help your adult life.
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: It's not gonna help your life at all.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: No.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: And so you have to learn to reprogram all that.
• 3:53
  Speaker: It's like it was a total assault on your nervous system.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: Oh, and I never realized until I was older, when I left home, um, you know, I had terrible bowel problems.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: I had terrible- Oh, bless you anxiety.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: I mean, I, I, I was so angry.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: I couldn't understand why I was like that because I was really just a, um, a quiet little girl.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: But obviously, you know, learning later, you learn that- Yeah these things trigger you, and you, you just, you know,"Why me?
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: How dare you?"
• 4:22
  Speaker: Mm.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: What gives you the right?" You know?
• 4:24
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: How could you even have kids if that's what you're gonna be like?
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: You know, all these questions come, and so you have to- Sure deal with it.
• 4:30
  Speaker: So how, what were the steps, like that you had to walk through to get some healing, to get some stability in your mind again?
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: Um, I'm very blessed that I met the Lord when I was 12.
• 4:44
  Speaker: Good.
• 4:44
  Speaker: Yes
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: I, man, I just, I hanged on to God with every fiber of my being.
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: And I've been saved now for over 50 years.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: So-
• 4:53
  Speaker: Wow
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: I, I just found him, and he was such a anchor, such a, a, um, a comfort in my life.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: So good.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: And as I developed my relationship with him, I realized something's not right.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: I'm not acting right.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: I'm not normal.
• 5:06
  Speaker: Okay.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: Um, you know, this is now in the'80s.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: We didn't have Google.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: We didn't have...
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: All we had was a set of encyclopedias.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: If you looked up- I remember anxiety in the encyclopedia, it doesn't say squat.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: No.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: There's no, um, answer for sexual abuse.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: There's no answer for anything.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: The, the encyclopedia- Right was nothing.
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: There was no information.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: So you just had to sort of work it out.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: And in those days, you know, going to a psychologist or a counselor was extremely expensive, and- Mm-hmm it was always a cliche that, you know, if you went to those kind of people, whoa, you know, you really got problems.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: So you tend to sort of try and work things out on your own.
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: And no one was ever writing books in those days about a lot of stuff.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: So I just spent a lot of time in prayer.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: And as I prayed, God would say to me,"You've got to control your temper." And I would say,"Doesn't everyone have a temper?
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: Isn't everybody angry like me?" No.
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: "I, you know, isn't it just normal?" And then he would start showing me things that I was doing- Oh, wow and saying.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: And as I read the Bible, I realized, you know, God, Jesus, when he was on Earth, was loving and compassionate and happy.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: And I was not happy.
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: I mean, there's not a happy fiber in my body, you know?
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: And slowly he revealed things to me.
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: And slowly he gave me answers.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Um, which is what I talk about in my book, how he told me to count to 10 before I exploded.
• 6:20
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: And, I mean, 10 did nothing.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: I used to have to count to about 5,000 till I calmed down.
• 6:25
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: You just count until you feel breathe, and then when you get back in your right mind, you look at the situation, you think,"What am I upset about?
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: It's nothing."
• 6:33
  Speaker: Wow.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: You know, I realized I just lived on a low snare.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: I was, I was like a little version of my father, which I detested to, to no degree, because the, I didn't want any part of him in me.
• 6:44
  Speaker: Right.
• 6:45
  Speaker: I understand.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: Yet you become the project.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: You know, you, you, you, that's all you knew.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: I lived in that house.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: That's all I knew.
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: When something didn't go right, you threw things.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: You know, you screamed and shout.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: You know, that's all I knew.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:56
  Speaker: That's an intense story.
• 6:58
  Speaker: I love, though- Yeah how, I so love how y- you stayed with the Lord and, you know, day in, day out, month in, month out, he answered questions.
• 7:08
  Speaker: And, you know, um, I was in a abusive relationship, a marriage, for 26 years, and if I didn't have my time with God, I don't know how I would have survived it.
• 7:17
  Speaker: So I can totally, I can feel what you said, that you had, y- you know, there wasn't anything for you, but you stayed with Jesus.
• 7:25
  Speaker: You stayed with God.
• 7:26
  Speaker: Mm.
• 7:27
  Speaker: That's a testimony in itself.
• 7:29
  Speaker: Mm.
• 7:29
  Speaker: So you have a book.
• 7:30
  Speaker: My, it's My Journey To Enjoying My Life.
• 7:34
  Speaker: Is that the name of the book?
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: That's the name of the book, yes.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: It's my testimony.
• 7:37
  Speaker: I will link it in the show notes, but is this- Pretty much the journey of overcoming abuse that you share in the book
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: Um, excuse me.
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it is.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: Um You know, a lot of people tell you about the abuse, and they tell you how hard it was and how horrible it was, and they, you know.
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: But h- how do we get out of it?
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: That's so- How do I become normal?
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: Good job.
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: And how am I- Yeah.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: I mean, how am I going to get from ooh to- Yeah you know what I mean?
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: H- you know, you, you need to know how to do this.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: And this is what the book is about.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: I have 12 steps- Oh in there.
• 8:12
  Speaker: Nice
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: And to this day- I like that I still do these 12 steps.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: Wonderful How to work out Because when I, when I, when all the lights sort of tried to come on-
• 8:21
  Speaker: Yeah
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: I did not know what a, a, a woman was.
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: I did not know what a mother was.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: I did not know what a wife was.
• 8:28
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 8:29
  Speaker: I
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: just knew how to survive.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: I didn't know- Yeah I mean, there were so many things my mother never taught me.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: Oh, I'm sorry.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: You know, hygiene things and- Yeah how a woman acts and how a wife should be and, and, and what a mother should do for her child.
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: I had no role models.
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: You know, my father kept us really secluded.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: There was just us five and no more.
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:50
  Speaker: Wow.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: We didn't mix.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: We didn't have friends over.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: We didn't socialize.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: That's so hard.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: So you think, excuse me, you think that your world is perfect because you've got nothing else to compare it to.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: And of course, you don't discuss what's going on in your world.
• 9:04
  Speaker: So
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: you- Because what my dad used to say,"Don't tell anyone what's going on in our home."
• 9:08
  Speaker: Your mom- Because- was frozen.
• 9:10
  Speaker: That's why.
• 9:11
  Speaker: She was, like, frozen.
• 9:12
  Speaker: Terrible.
• 9:12
  Speaker: That's why she couldn't, uh It sounds like that's why she couldn't really-
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah you
• 9:17
  Speaker: know,
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: minister to you.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: She was too fearful, just like we did.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: We all- Yeah lived in fear.
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: So- Wow it was, it was just that normal.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: But then, um, in my book, I write about how the lights came on.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: Okay, so here I am.
• 9:30
  Speaker: Uh-huh.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: I want to be a godly woman.
• 9:33
  Speaker: Okay.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: What do I have to do- Mm to become a godly woman?
• 9:37
  Speaker: So good.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: Here's the wife.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: How do I become a godly wife?
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: So good.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: Here's the mother.
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: How do I become And so I take my view, the readers through each step that I did.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: I give prayers.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: I give practical advice.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: I give scriptures that I used.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: It's a very much a to-do book.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: But in saying that, Teresa, it's a very in your face book.
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, right.
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: It's a, it's a, if you are ready to do this journey- Yeah and get over the past and move on and do something about it- Mm.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: Wow it's the book for you.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: But if you want- Like- to say,"I'm so sorry, and- a journey to take I know I'm one of those," it's not that book.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: I gotcha.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: I understand your heart.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: No.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: I understand it's a jou- a journey.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: It's- But I want you to get to the other side.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: And so my whole goal in this book is to be in your face and get you to the other side.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: I love
• 10:23
  Speaker: that.
• 10:23
  Speaker: And that's- Yeah what's needed today, in 2026.
• 10:27
  Speaker: It's still needed.
• 10:28
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 10:29
  Speaker: So you also write a newsletter, is that correct?
• 10:32
  Speaker: And you're very bold, getting bolder, uh, of doing reels and stuff on Facebook, but is that one way Does the newsletter go to a blog or to a website or something like that?
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: So if you go to my website, correnthomson.au- Um, a pop-up will come up.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: If you subscribe to that, you'll go on my newsletter.
• 10:53
  Speaker: Okay.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: I do it three times a month.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: Um, I do, uh, encouragement.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Whatever God lays on my heart, you know, uh,'cause I've got some followers that have been following me for a number of years now, so- Sure.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah I like to speak into their lives.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: I do a bit of promotions for my books.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: Um, and I do the blog posts, which is also whatever's on my heart.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: I just share- That's so good little nuggets, you know.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: Just short- Yeah and sweet, not long pages and-
• 11:16
  Speaker: Yeah
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: just, just something that you can meditate on and think,"Okay, you know, this is, this is
• 11:21
  Speaker: it." You, you, you blessed me with that strategy because all through the, the, uh, abuse and such, I would never throw up online.
• 11:28
  Speaker: I never throw up in my newsletters, but I wrote a newsletter every Sunday night.
• 11:32
  Speaker: And like I said, I wasn't telling them what was happening, but I was learning so much from God in the midst of it that I would pour from the overflow of that well.
• 11:43
  Speaker: And I love that that you do that because in some ways I feel like th- that's a lost art.
• 11:47
  Speaker: I, I, I don't do newsletters anymore, but I just think that's, that's an art.
• 11:52
  Speaker: That's a heart that really takes care of your subscribers, and it's just beautiful.
• 11:57
  Speaker: So, I, I am so glad.
• 11:59
  Speaker: So what are, what are some of the problems the people that you see, the women you serve, what she's usually walking through?
• 12:06
  Speaker: Some of the same, or trauma, or abuse?
• 12:09
  Speaker: Or what, what do, what do you find is the common
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: thing?
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: I think a lot of it is shame.
• 12:13
  Speaker: Mm.
• 12:13
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: Um, because a lot that is stolen from you is not returnable physically.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Um, rejection.
• 12:21
  Speaker: Mm.
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: Abandonment.
• 12:23
  Speaker: Okay.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: Um, you just don't f- because the abuser tends to take away your identity.
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: He takes away your self-worth.
• 12:30
  Speaker: Yes.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: You have to find that, and the only fi- way you can find that is in Christ.
• 12:35
  Speaker: Yes.
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: We have to take on God's identity.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: We have to become God's children.
• 12:40
  Speaker: Right.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: I'm not my father's child.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: I'm God's child.
• 12:43
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: And my Father in heaven thinks I'm the best thing since sliced bread.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: My Father in heaven loves me.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: Come on.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: He cares about me.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: He, he's so good to me.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: I'm his favorite.
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: I'm his favorite.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: Me too.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: Me too.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: And he is so good to me.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: Um, and when I saw that, when I looked at myself through God's eyes-
• 13:01
  Speaker: Yes
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: it changes my image.
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: And I allow that image to per- pen- penetrate right in me- Sure and clean the hurt.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: Good.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: Clean the rejection.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: So good.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: Clean the, the, uh, the lost-ness, the little girl that's crying.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: "Daddy, why couldn't you love me?
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: Mommy, why couldn't you take care of me?" Yeah.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Those questions may never have answers.
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: Um, like I said, I found out my dad was not a, like, a well man.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: He could never have taken care of me.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: In fact, my dad should never have got married and had three kids, and then- Right.
• 13:28
  Speaker: Right
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: um, my mom, she was a nice woman until my dad got hold of her.
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: Um- But he, he beat the life out of her.
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: He beat all the- Oh the happiness out of her, all the individuality.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: That's so tough.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: We all had to dress like he wanted to dress.
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: She had to do her hair like he, she had to- Yeah uh, but everything was controlled.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: How, how, when we bathed was controlled.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Everything was controlled in our lives.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: What we ate, how much we ate.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: Uh.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: It was incredible.
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: It was just incredible, uh, uh, uh, the m- the, the thing that he did.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: So I found my identity in Christ.
• 14:01
  Speaker: Amen.
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: And in Christ is freedom.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: In Ch- you know, words like shame and not good enough and rejection, these are not words in God's vocabulary.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: These are man-made words.
• 14:11
  Speaker: Yes.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: God's vocabulary says,"You're the apple of my eye.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: You are precious.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: You are loved." Yeah.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: "You are cared for.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: You are, you are everything to..." God has a whole different mindset about you.
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: I mean, he, he loved you before the beginning of the earth be- Yeah and Jesus died for you before you were even a thought- Right of conception.
• 14:29
  Speaker: I, I-
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: That's how much he wanted you in his family
• 14:31
  Speaker: I just see you comforting so many women.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: Oh, praise God.
• 14:35
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 14:35
  Speaker: Praise
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: God.
• 14:35
  Speaker: I,
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: I just- Yeah, there's a lot of hurting people out there.
• 14:38
  Speaker: So many are hurting.
• 14:39
  Speaker: Oh, yeah.
• 14:39
  Speaker: And there's just
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: not
• 14:40
  Speaker: the li- the, the finding the answers is not, uh, easy and- Yeah uh, forgive me for saying this, but even sometimes Christian counseling isn't the answer if they don't.
• 14:50
  Speaker: Mm-hmm.
• 14:51
  Speaker: Mm-hmm.
• 14:51
  Speaker: I, you know, I went to Christian counseling, and I stopped'cause they told me,"Oh, you're good," and I wasn't good, and I happened- Mm to find a neurocycle strategist, neurocyc- of Dr.
• 15:02
  Speaker: Caroline Leaf's, and it took- Oh, she's
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: brilliant.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: She's brilliant it took years of rewiring- Oh deconstructing the lies.
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: You
• 15:05
  Speaker: know what the lie I dealt with?
• 15:10
  Speaker: Maybe you can relate to this.
• 15:11
  Speaker: I'm not good enough.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: That's a demon.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: I still deal with that.
• 15:15
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: I always say to myself,"Who do you think you are putting reels out?
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: Who's going to listen to you?" And next thing, I get 1,000 views, and I think-
• 15:23
  Speaker: I'm giving you a high five for that
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: "See, the Lord heard us."
• 15:24
  Speaker: You know?
• 15:24
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 15:24
  Speaker: And- But
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: it, but it's the lies of the devil because he knows that you have overcome.
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: You've got victory.
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: You've got answers, and he doesn't want you to share them with anyone else- Right'cause he doesn't want them to get any victory in their life.
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 15:35
  Speaker: You know?
• 15:35
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 15:35
  Speaker: I think there's hope for a woman who's maybe in the middle of this because- Oh God doesn't g- God doesn't give up on you, and sometimes- Yeah the chapter that you're walking in is the chapter of resilience, of abiding in Christ and staying.
• 15:51
  Speaker: Then you look back and think,"Wow, that was a story for God's glory if there ever was one." Yeah.
• 15:57
  Speaker: So- Yeah I mean, what would you just say to someone who's kind of in the middle of it?
• 16:01
  Speaker: They're not quite seeing the light at the end of their trauma tunnel.
• 16:04
  Speaker: What would you, uh, what would you share with them, Karen?
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: I would share that God is your answer.
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: And in God is all the answers.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: So the, the, the most important thing you can do is get close to him.
• 16:18
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: The more you hear his voice, the more you hear his direction- Yeah the more answers you will get.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: So good.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: And when God says to you,"Go left," he's going left with you.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 16:29
  Speaker: And
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: the empowerment of the Spirit of God, the empowerment of the anointing- Mm all going left.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: That's
• 16:34
  Speaker: so good.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: If you go le- right-
• 16:36
  Speaker: Mm
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: God can't go with you'cause left is the answer.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: So you have to know what does God want you.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: Does he want you to stay?
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Does he want you to go?
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: Does he want you to change this?
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: Should you do this?
• 16:47
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: We need direction.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: Abused people need direction.
• 16:51
  Speaker: Yes.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: And, you know, uh, because sometimes when you're abused, you can't think logically.
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: You don't, you don't seem to think clearly.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Your mind is so bogged down.
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: You know, it's feeling you got so many...
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: It's, it's like a, it's like a trauma tunnel.
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: I speak about this in my book, where your mind's on a loop and you just, you're so flustered.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: It's, it's to try and get still and just hear that voice of God.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: And you know what God did for me is he ga- he sent a book across my path-
• 17:15
  Speaker: Okay
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: that, um, was called, uh, by Pat Harrison, um, I don't even know if it's still in publish.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: It was called Woman, Wife and Mother.
• 17:22
  Speaker: Oh, wow.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: It covered everything I need.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: I needed to be a woman.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: What was a woman?
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: I need to be a wife.
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: I need to be a mother.
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: God sent material to me.
• 17:31
  Speaker: Wow.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: If you are hungry looking for answers, God will put a right person in your path.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: He'll put a scripture in front of you.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: He'll put a sermon in front of you.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: He'll put a book in front of you.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: You need to be open to answers, and often answers don't come in a format or the, uh, way that you might want them to come.
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: That's true.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: But if you open to answers, God is always leading you.
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: God is always speaking.
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: God is always wanting to help you.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: So open your heart to receive help, and he will an- the Bible says,"Call on me and I will show you." Yes.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: He says,"I know the things I have for you.
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: They're good plans." I
• 18:05
  Speaker: have the best for you,
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: yes.
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: We need to tap into all this.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: And so the first way to tap is to ask God,"Help me.
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: Help me." Okay.
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: And I promise you he will.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: I promise you.
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: Just
• 18:13
  Speaker: a simple,"Help me." You know- Yeah it says in the Word,"Draw near to God and He'll draw near to you." And He's- Amen.
• 18:19
  Speaker: And it also says,"He's near to the broken-hearted and saves us." Wow.
• 18:23
  Speaker: So He's not, He's not intimidated by your brokenness.
• 18:27
  Speaker: He's y- No, no and I thought, I think you, you hit it really good when you said shame.
• 18:32
  Speaker: Or, or th- this way, Karen.
• 18:34
  Speaker: Some people think they've stepped over this imaginary line in their mind that they can't come back.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 18:41
  Speaker: And I go,"I've j- done it.
• 18:42
  Speaker: I've done it all.
• 18:43
  Speaker: I can't come back." And when, when someone says that, or when I think about that, I think about the father in, of the Prodigal's son.
• 18:50
  Speaker: And think about- Mm I always have this picture of him sitting on the porch day in and day out.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: Waiting,
• 18:56
  Speaker: waiting, yeah.
• 18:57
  Speaker: Waiting and wait.
• 18:57
  Speaker: Then one son's place is, the son was finding his place of setting, he sees a figure out in the horizon.
• 19:02
  Speaker: He's like,"Is that my son?
• 19:04
  Speaker: Wait.
• 19:05
  Speaker: That walks like my son." And did he stay on the porch and say,"It's about time he came home"?
• 19:08
  Speaker: No, he ran.
• 19:09
  Speaker: He r- Oh threw a robe around him and had a party.
• 19:13
  Speaker: How much more- Yeah I think Karen is saying will God do for that you as you just come to Him, return to Him.
• 19:21
  Speaker: Repent- Oh and return to Him.
• 19:23
  Speaker: So I, I just think, I just got fired up on that because look at your life and look where you are now.
• 19:30
  Speaker: Teaching- Wow and speaking hope.
• 19:32
  Speaker: You're using your story for God's glory.
• 19:35
  Speaker: Thank you.
• 19:36
  Speaker: I mean, sometimes I just feel like- I can't thank you I gotta say thank you to these brave women who- Yeah walked through lots of stuff, so.
• 19:44
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 19:45
  Speaker: And I love, I mean, in a way I see myself in you with the newsletters and st- I mean, maybe you're younger.
• 19:53
  Speaker: No.
• 19:53
  Speaker: I, you know, can I tell you how g- I sa- my, I wanted to share this with you'cause I think you'll be blessed.
• 19:58
  Speaker: 'Cause I think this is your survival.
• 20:01
  Speaker: Well, how you survived.
• 20:02
  Speaker: I said,"God, how, how did I, how did I fight for my voice in the midst of that cacophony?" And He said two things, Theresa.
• 20:11
  Speaker: He said,"One, you stayed in my presence.
• 20:14
  Speaker: And two, you-" You created the way I created.
• 20:21
  Speaker: So back then, I would write, God would just, I couldn't conjure him up.
• 20:25
  Speaker: God would just swoosh by, and I'd, I have listened to the Vinedresser, and I'd write out what he said and started to share some, and, and then ended up putting three books on Amazon.
• 20:35
  Speaker: I took them down because I need to repurpose them.
• 20:38
  Speaker: I was playing the good wife too much, and it wasn't true.
• 20:40
  Speaker: But, but I think from a very young age, and then as you grew in your relationship, you were, you're, today you're creating the way God creates.
• 20:51
  Speaker: Mm.
• 20:52
  Speaker: In your newsletter, in your book.
• 20:54
  Speaker: I mean, that is so exciting.
• 20:55
  Speaker: To me, that gives hope.
• 20:56
  Speaker: 'Cause when I look at the, the s- the stuff you went through, and I hear a lot of different stories, I say,"God, only you."
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: Only, o- only God.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I mean, if I was left to my own devices, I probably would have killed myself.
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: I, I- Yeah'cause I, when I got into my teens, I was, it was hopeless.
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: I just- Yeah didn't see a way out.
• 21:14
  Speaker: Wow.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: I didn't know what I was gonna do with my life.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: Um- I just, it just got so...
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: I, I mean, by the time I got to my, uh, 16, 17-
• 21:24
  Speaker: Yeah
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: I was so bad traumatized that I would be somewhere and just pass out.
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: Oh, bless you.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: On the street, in the bus, anywhere.
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: No kidding.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: I just, my mind just blocked.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: I couldn't cope.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: I was, I was really in a bad way.
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: And, um, there was no help.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: There's no doctor.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: You know, when you don't have your parents taking care of you, you don't know what to do.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: Mm.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 21:43
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: So it was very, very...
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: And, and then, um, God sent my husband to me.
• 21:48
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: That's great.
• 21:50
  Speaker: He's amazing.
• 21:50
  Speaker: That's
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: so good.
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: Just
• 21:51
  Speaker: amazing.
• 21:51
  Speaker: I
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: love that.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: Sent my husband to...
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: And I'm married to him for 49 years.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: It's just amazing.
• 21:55
  Speaker: Oh, God bless you.
• 21:56
  Speaker: Thank you.
• 21:56
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 21:56
  Speaker: Let's, let's celebrate that.
• 21:57
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 21:57
  Speaker: That's awesome.
• 21:58
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 21:58
  Speaker: I love to hear.
• 21:59
  Speaker: Thank
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: you, Jesus.
• 22:00
  Speaker: When I hear good stories like that, I think, yeah, men
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: can-
• 22:03
  Speaker: Oh be kind.
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, so can he.
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: Todd, he's so good to me.
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: Oh, that's so- Um- Yeah and we still, we still love each other so much.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: And, you know, he's a traumatized man.
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: He was in the war, and he's also had family issues.
• 22:16
  Speaker: Okay.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: The chances of two of us even- Ah living, having a marriage of a year would be a miracle.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: The 49.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: And the fact that both of us love Jesus.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: He's healed both of us.
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: It's just- Mm.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: You know, there are answers in God.
• 22:28
  Speaker: Yes.
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: I'm not saying the journey is a piece of cake.
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: I'm not saying- No"Yay, lay hands on your head." Yeah.
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: "Brush under, son, and you're all healed." It's a journey.
• 22:36
  Speaker: Yes.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: But if you want results, if you want answers, they are there for you.
• 22:40
  Speaker: Wow.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: And anything worth doing is hard.
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: You wanna, you wanna- That's right a fit body?
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: You're gonna have to You're gonna have to work for it.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: You wanna, you wanna ha- be healthy?
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: You're gonna have to cut down the ice cream and cut down the sugar.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: You know, you, you want certain things, there are principles that you have to apply.
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: It's not a easy,"Oh, hello.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: It's all there." It's not like that.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: No.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: It's work.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: It's effort.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: It's work.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: But the rewards- But it's so worth it are amazing.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: The rewards are amazing.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: So- I would not change my life.
• 23:07
  Speaker: The, the rewards are shown in your eyes and your smile.
• 23:10
  Speaker: Yeah.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Jesus.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: It's so good.
• 23:12
  Speaker: So, listen, I...
• 23:14
  Speaker: So you, are you f- this, it's Karin, K-I, K-A-R-I-N.
• 23:19
  Speaker: But I see you're on Instagram at karin.thomson_author.
• 23:25
  Speaker: What are you on in, at Facebook?
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: I said karenthompson.author-
• 23:31
  Speaker: Okay
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: also on Facebook, yeah
• 23:32
  Speaker: And I will link your book, My Journey to Enjoying My fi- Enjoying My Life.
• 23:37
  Speaker: That will definitely be in the show notes.
• 23:40
  Speaker: And I just gotta say thank you because you've stood strong.
• 23:44
  Speaker: Oh.
• 23:45
  Speaker: Because you've st- you're learning to use your voice like never before, whether it's writing or on a reel.
• 23:50
  Speaker: I just see that God has, um He's just saying,"I'm proud of you, Karen."
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Oh, thank you, Teresa.
• 23:56
  Speaker: That's amazing.
• 23:56
  Speaker: Like a father-
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: Thank you
• 23:58
  Speaker: I think He's saying,"I'm proud of you," and, uh, you still have dreams on your heart, and God knows that.
• 24:04
  Speaker: I think He knows and hears.
• 24:05
  Speaker: Right.
• 24:06
  Speaker: So look out.
• 24:07
  Speaker: Look out for the suddenly.
• 24:08
  Speaker: You never know.
• 24:09
  Speaker: So- Yeah,
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: that's right.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 24:11
  Speaker: Thank you.
• 24:11
  Speaker: Life is
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: never dull following the Lord, is it?
• 24:14
  Speaker: Amen.
• 24:15
  Speaker: Well, Karen, thank you so much.
• 24:16
  Speaker: And that is today's calling session with Karen Thompson.
• 24:21
  Speaker: If her story moved you, do two things.
• 24:24
  Speaker: Go follow her.
• 24:25
  Speaker: Go buy her book.
• 24:26
  Speaker: I'll have the links in the show notes.
• 24:28
  Speaker: And share this episode with the woman who came to mind while you were listening to it.
• 24:34
  Speaker: Some stories are not for scrolling past.
• 24:39
  Speaker: I'm theresa Croft with the Stuck No More Voices podcast.