Latest / Funny Comedy | Laugh Out Loud / S6 Ep9: Guess How Much? Jimmy O. Yang's Sugar Baby Saga 🤣

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S6 Ep9: Guess How Much? Jimmy O. Yang's Sugar Baby Saga 🤣 · Funny Comedy | Laugh Out Loud

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_01: I love her very much, man.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_01: She's an amazing person.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_01: She's very successful.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_01: My girlfriend's a venture capitalist.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, fucking jackpot, right?
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_01: You know?
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: It's great, it's great.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, for you guys that don't know what a venture capital means, uh, it means that I'm the poorest person she knows.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_01: And what that really means is I'm her sugar baby.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_01: So it's great.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Gender equality! That's what I'm talking about.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's time for men to get taken care of.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: See that brother high-fiving his girl, appreciate you, man.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: Fellow sugar baby.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_01: Come on.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: I love her, man.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: I'm trying to, I'm trying to be a better boyfriend.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_01: I'm new to this like boyfriend stuff, right?
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: I used to take everything so personally.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_01: Like every time we'll get into a fight, I'm like, babe, why are you why are you mad at me?
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm the perfect boyfriend.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: Wrong answer.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: Fellas, fellas.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: If your girl's mad at you, you can't take that shit personally.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: Because it's not even about you.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: She doesn't even know what she's mad about.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: You just happen to be there, you know what I mean?
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_01: You're a victim of circumstance, man.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: So it's not your job to engage in an argument, it's your job to diffuse the situation.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta jujitsu that shit until you get to the bottom of the real prom.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like the other week, she was mad at me about something.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, babe, I feel like we don't even like go on date nights anymore.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, okay.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: I hear you.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: But what's really going on?
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: And she was like, well, sometimes I feel like you like hanging out with your buddies more than you like hanging out with me.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, okay, I hear you.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: But what's really going on?
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: And then she takes a deep breath.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: And she was like, remember last week of my birthday?
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_01: Heather brought a cousin and she didn't even know my name.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, see, that's your problem right there.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Heather cousins a bitch, you know.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck her, man.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: Let's focus our energy on her.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: I'm trying to be a better communicator, man.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_01: My girl always wants me to talk about my feelings.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_01: She's like, babe, I wish you'd talk about your feelings more.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I feel fine.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_01: What more do you want me to say?
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not that emotionally involved.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know what else.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm fine.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_01: But don't keep asking me that.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: Because the fifth time you asked me that, I might not be fine.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_01: The fifth time you ask me that shit, some dark shit is gonna come out.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, babe, how are you feeling?
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know, I'm angry all the time.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: Because my dad yelled at me after ping pong practice.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_01: See, guys and girls were just different, man.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: Girls are so emotionally evolved.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we even hang out different.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_01: One night I came home early, my girl was having a girls' night at the house.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: I've never seen anything like that.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: The TV was off.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_01: Seven girls sitting in a circle, making direct eye contact with each other.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: Every candle in the house was lit.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I walked by, I'm like, what is this witchcraft?
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: And I just backed into my own room.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_01: Fellas, we hang out different.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_01: Guys, when we hang out, we sit in a straight line.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_01: TV on full blast, zero eye contact with each other.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_01: My girl came home early.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: She was so confused.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, babe, you guys didn't talk for like six hours.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, yeah, isn't that fucking awesome?
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: That's us.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: That's guys.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_01: But in a relationship, it's important to speak the same language.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: My girl asked me, she was like, babe, what's your love language?
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, what?
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: She's like, you know, your love language.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_01: Like, how do you convey love to your partners and loved ones?
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like, for example, a love language could be words of affirmation.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like, words of affirmation?
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: I was raised by Asian parents.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: I've never heard one word of affirmation in my life.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody ever told me, Jimmy, you're so great, you can do it.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: They're like, don't fuck it up.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_01: Their love language was verbal abuse.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: Trying to figure out my love languages.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: Physical touch, right?
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_01: It's another love language.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody touched me until I was 22.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not familiar with that.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: What are some other love languages?
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_01: Act of service.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: What I like, I like every woman just screaming out at their partner.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: Act of service! Gift giving!
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: I think gift giving is a good one, okay?
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_01: I love giving gifts to my girl, she loves giving gifts to me.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: We love that, right?
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like, for example, I love buying my girl shoes.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: She loves shoes, and we wear the same shoe size.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: The perfect gift for the whole family.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: These are her shoes tonight, you know.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_01: It's me perfect.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: And in return, I let her wear all of my Jordans.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, guys, you guys know that's love.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: Because Jordans, to guys, that's our most prized possession.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: If we let you slip into our Jordans, that's like you letting us slip in to you.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: You know?
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: Same thing.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: But sometimes, sometimes I get a little nervous because her feet's a little dirty, okay?
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_01: And she's a white girl, so her feet extra dirty.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you know what I mean?
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't know.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: White people, I don't know what the fuck you guys do with your feet all day?
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: You guys just barefoot all the time, frolicking around like Jenny from Forrest Gump, you know?
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: White people, you guys got some strong ass feet, man.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: Just 120 degrees outside, hot cement, just like y'all got some hunter-gatherer feet.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: See, every culture we got different feet etiquette, all right?
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: White people want to get in touch with Mother Earth.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: That's great.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_01: Black people, on the other hand, I live with a black roommate for six years.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: Never saw his toes once.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_01: He came out the shower with socks on, man.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, what the you got a sock draw on there, brother?
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_01: Asian people, you guys know the rule.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: When you come into the house, you take your shoes off, right?
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_01: You're like, we all know that.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: But our but our feet actually never touch the floor.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: Because when you take your shoes off at the house, we got two pairs of house shoes ready for you.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_01: And then when you walk outside, we got two pairs of Crocs ready for you.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_01: And then when you come back in the bedroom, we got two other pairs of slippers that we stole from a hotel in Vegas.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_01: We ready?
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Our feet never touch the floor.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: We got baby soft feet.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: I think Asian people, our most natural love language is act of service, right?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: That's what our parents did to us.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_01: They might never say, I love you, but they did a lot of nice things for us.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: Every night, I don't care how busy my parents were, they'll come home and make a five-course meal.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's love right there, right?
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, give it up for them.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, give it up.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: In our culture, food is love.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_01: I love cooking for my girl.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: We love cooking together.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: Food is love.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_01: That's why I hate watching all these reality cooking shows where they make food so freaking stressful.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: Like all these guys with aggressive tattoos and they're just sweating it in the kitchen.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: They're like, yes, chef! Yes, chef! Two minutes, two minutes, it's still raw, it's still raw, and they're just making fucking scallops.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_01: There's two items on the menu, and they can't handle that shit.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_01: You go to any Chinese restaurant, there's about 485 items on the menu.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_01: And there's one dude back there in the kitchen.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_01: He's not a chef, he's somebody's uncle from Hong Kong.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_01: And he knows how to make everything in under 30 seconds.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_01: That guy's the real hero, you know what I mean?
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_01: He got a yellow wife beater that he brought from the old country.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_01: Just chilling, near the walk, cigarette in his mouth, just like that guy's a gangster, man.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: And he just cusses casually in Cantonese, just like.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_01: Any of you guys speak Cantonese here?
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: Couple of you guys.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_01: I was born in Hong Kong, that's my first language.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_01: I love that language, right?
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's the most fun language to speak, because it's the most fun language to cuss in.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: In Cantonese, you can just like low-key casually cuss.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: Like you go to Chinatown, you see like a nice old man walk by.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_01: He would just be like, ah, deal moham got.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds really nice, right?
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: But what he actually said was like, oh, fuck your mother and hope your whole family dies.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's Cantonese, man.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta love it.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta love it, man.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_01: In a relationship, I think it's important to know how you convey love, but it's just as important to know how you receive love.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_01: You gotta be vulnerable and let your partner do nice things for you.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_01: See, I'm not very good at that.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: I I'm terrible at like directly asking for things that I want.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: So instead, I just drop little hints.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's called being passive aggressive.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: Don't do that.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_01: Don't do that.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like, for example, I love watching these YouTube videos of Japanese housewives making bento boxes.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_01: It's very nice, very cute, it's like a little ASMR, you know?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's just really nice.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: This Japanese woman wakes up at 6 a.m.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_01: every day to make her working husband a bento box.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_01: But I can't ask my venture capitalist girlfriend to make me a bentho box.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not an idiot, I'm a sugar baby.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: I know my role.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_01: So instead of asking it directly, I just drop little hints.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_01: Like we'll be sitting on a couch together.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: I just pull on my phone and pretend I accidentally stumbled onto this video.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, oh, what is this?
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: Bento boxes?
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, it's so cute.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: What is that?
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_01: Like a rice ball shaped like a panda?
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: Look, look, look, look.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, so she makes this every day for him?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, she must love him so much.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I thought I was being slick until she came out to one of my shows.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_01: And she heard this joke.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: And she was really upset, man, and rightfully so.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_01: I was just up here talking shit, right?
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_01: We went home, we got into a big five.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: She was like, babe, that's bullshit, okay?
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: If you want me to do something, why don't you just ask me directly?
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: If you really want somebody to make you bento boxes, why don't you just go find a Japanese woman?
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, babe, I'm I'm I'm sorry you feel that way.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, okay, but I think you're missing the point.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to be Japanese to make bento boxes.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: So now I'm making her bento boxes every day.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_01: How I show my love.