Latest / The Layback Podcast / Matt Swilley, Professional Pitcher (Rays, Padres, Indy Ball, LMB) Ep. 81

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Matt Swilley, Professional Pitcher (Rays, Padres, Indy Ball, LMB) Ep. 81 · The Layback Podcast

• 0:00
  Hey everyone, welcome back to the Layback Podcast.
• 0:02
  Joining us today is right-handed pitcher Matt Swilley.
• 0:06
  Now, there's so much more to Matt than just calling him a
• 0:09
  right-handed pitcher. He's a father, he's a family
• 0:12
  man. He's lived a few lives in
• 0:14
  professional baseball thus far and he still has a lot more to
• 0:17
  give this game. And before I spoil anything too
• 0:21
  much, I'm just going to kick it over to him, let him cover some
• 0:25
  of the highlights and we'll get into it as always.
• 0:28
  So Matt, thanks for joining us. Congrats on, I guess the great
• 0:33
  parts to a slightly up and down season in Mexico and I'm excited
• 0:38
  to talk about everything that we have before us.
• 0:41
  Yeah, thanks man. I appreciate you having me.
• 0:43
  If I were to boil this thing down as as brief as I can, I'll
• 0:48
  start with the fact that I was drafted in 2009.
• 0:52
  It's funny I when I tell people that they kind of, you know,
• 0:55
  2009, I was a high school draft pick out of El Camino High
• 0:59
  School in Oceanside, CA. I was drafted by the Tampa Bay
• 1:03
  Rays in the first round when they used to have like 40 rounds
• 1:06
  and I was with them for almost five years, 2/2 of the years I
• 1:12
  spent getting TJ and rehabbing. TJI was released shortly after
• 1:17
  the TJ. It was kind of a rocky road even
• 1:20
  with them. I went through the yips, had TJ.
• 1:23
  You'll, you'll find a common theme that I've if, if you've
• 1:27
  struggled with it, I've probably been through it in your baseball
• 1:30
  career. So yeah, got released, spent the
• 1:33
  next year, kind of did a gap year before gap years were cool
• 1:38
  with with the pitching coach threw in like collegiate summer
• 1:42
  league Velo started to really climb at that point.
• 1:46
  And then I played Indy ball after that in the American
• 1:49
  Association with a team called the Joplin Blasters that no
• 1:53
  longer exists. I spent that winter in Australia
• 1:57
  and then came back, hurt my arm in preseason with that same
• 2:03
  Joplin team. And then after I hurt my arm,
• 2:06
  went home to rehab. It met my now quit baseball
• 2:10
  started just working, wasn't sure what I was going to do.
• 2:13
  So I was working at Starbucks waiting tables.
• 2:16
  I did that for a couple years. Then I started eventually
• 2:19
  started a business with a buddy of mine where we trained
• 2:22
  athletes around the same time, like a few years into it, he was
• 2:26
  hired by the Tigers. He's still with the Tigers as a
• 2:30
  as a coach. He's come full circle from
• 2:33
  pitching and now he's a hitting coach for the high A-Team.
• 2:35
  And then I I signed with the Padres after not playing for
• 2:38
  like like 7 years. So that was a cool experience
• 2:42
  because I was a hometown team. Ended up getting a shoulder
• 2:45
  impingement. My one year contract expired,
• 2:48
  Thought I might be done again because the shoulder wasn't
• 2:50
  bouncing back. So I started coaching again, Arm
• 2:54
  started feeling good again, made another comeback.
• 2:57
  It's hard not to keep coming back when you see triple digits
• 3:00
  on the gun. You're just like maybe one more
• 3:03
  shot. I bet I could piece it together.
• 3:05
  And then, yeah, ended up finding myself, Long story short, found
• 3:09
  myself in Mexico this year, started off with the Diablos and
• 3:12
  then finish up in Carretero with the conspirators.
• 3:16
  That's as that's as brief as I can make it.
• 3:18
  Yeah. So I'm sure we'll dive more into
• 3:21
  it though. There are so many things that we
• 3:23
  can get into. I know there's some selfish
• 3:26
  conversations that I want to have on air just with some life
• 3:30
  experiences going on. But maybe we'll we'll talk about
• 3:33
  the president, go in the past, bring it back to the future like
• 3:37
  any good movie does, talking about the present.
• 3:39
  So finishing up in Mexico, let's let's talk a bit about this
• 3:44
  season that you had. You worked super hard to be in a
• 3:47
  place where you could compete in Mexico this year.
• 3:50
  I know seeing a lot of what you were posting on social media in
• 3:53
  the offseason was looking for the right opportunity.
• 3:57
  So maybe maybe we'll even start there.
• 3:59
  How does it feel to be in a position where you can say I am
• 4:03
  looking for the right opportunity?
• 4:05
  What does that stuff mean to you and why that specific wording?
• 4:10
  Because you see so many people in baseball, they're just
• 4:12
  looking for the chance. You obviously have had chances,
• 4:16
  but now it needs to be the right situation.
• 4:18
  So what does that look like for you and how were you able to
• 4:22
  find it? Yeah.
• 4:23
  Well, I think part of it is the work that I've put in and the
• 4:27
  picture that I've kind of developed into.
• 4:29
  Probably the bigger part of looking for the right
• 4:31
  opportunity has to do with having a family.
• 4:34
  So you weigh the pros and cons and what is worth it for your
• 4:40
  family to be away from them. A lot of it, and most of it
• 4:43
  actually has has to do with is whatever opportunity I'm given
• 4:47
  worth being away from the family?
• 4:51
  Because what it comes down to, as much as he selfishly like I
• 4:54
  want to chase the dream, I feel like it's right there in terms
• 4:59
  of me becoming the pitcher that I'm capable of being.
• 5:04
  It also has to do with financially, like providing for
• 5:08
  my family, getting to spend the right amount of time with them.
• 5:11
  There's just so many factors with that.
• 5:13
  Then being able to come visit me.
• 5:16
  Does it set me up for another opportunity that's also going to
• 5:20
  benefit my family? So it's not necessarily just
• 5:23
  being single or I would probably be able to just continue to play
• 5:28
  for the sake of just continuing to play.
• 5:31
  Whereas having the family, it's like I have to be selective in
• 5:34
  the opportunities that I take and make sure that there's a
• 5:38
  future in that. And it's funny to say being 34
• 5:41
  years old, like becoming the pitcher that I'm capable of
• 5:44
  being and then also the future. But yeah, that's why I enjoy
• 5:49
  watching guys so much like Verlander, Eagles around 98 at
• 5:52
  42 years old. It makes you see, like, who's to
• 5:55
  say I can't do that? I always tell people too, and I
• 5:57
  love, I love saying it's like you got guys that peak at like
• 6:00
  20 years old and then their careers are like 20 to 30.
• 6:04
  And then you got guys that peak like in their early 30s even.
• 6:09
  Like I know he's he's a great pitcher and like physically he
• 6:11
  might not be peaking, but it all coming together.
• 6:14
  It's like the Padres having Nick Pavetta, like it's he's 32 and
• 6:18
  it's finally all starting to come together.
• 6:20
  And if who knows how long he's going to pitch for.
• 6:22
  And I think there's too much of A like, especially in the
• 6:26
  States. It's like in the downsized
• 6:28
  roster, they're like, you got to have young guys.
• 6:31
  We're moving over to a youth movement.
• 6:33
  OK? Like, I understand that, but
• 6:34
  life doesn't always work that way, where it's like in a neat
• 6:38
  little box where this guy's 18 years old and this is how he
• 6:41
  looks now. If you don't know what he's
• 6:43
  going to look like in five years, you know what I mean?
• 6:45
  So anyway, that's a little bit of a tangent, but I feel so
• 6:48
  strongly about that being, you know, 30-4 years old, feeling
• 6:51
  like I'm taking care of myself. Also the fortunate, you know,
• 6:55
  it's given me great health and things like that.
• 6:58
  But yeah, so a little bit of a tangent there, but I do, I do
• 7:01
  strongly believe in that. No, that's fair.
• 7:04
  And you mentioned the comparison of the US versus what you're
• 7:08
  seeing in some of these other leagues.
• 7:10
  You've been fortunate enough to play a bit internationally, like
• 7:13
  you said in Australia, in Mexico this past year as well as some
• 7:17
  winter ball. And you look at those rosters
• 7:19
  and you will see one or two guys every year, maybe they're
• 7:22
  surrounded by the low 20s guys or mid 20s prospect esque
• 7:27
  players. And then you have your 38 year
• 7:30
  old pitchers. That's still the best dude on
• 7:32
  the staff and dominates every single time he goes out there.
• 7:35
  It's funny, like I see guys, you get your guys that fall through
• 7:38
  the cracks in those leagues. Like there's a couple pitchers
• 7:41
  that I think right now can really help teams and in the big
• 7:45
  leagues, one that pops off first into my head is Yaka Bonus for
• 7:49
  the the Diablos. He's been in the big leagues,
• 7:52
  but you watch him right now and you're like, dude, this guy's a
• 7:54
  big league like bullpen guy right now.
• 7:57
  But like you see guys like that and then they're just so much
• 7:59
  more concerned about. I mean, they have their flaws
• 8:03
  too and how they look for guys. Like I think sometimes they get
• 8:05
  wrapped up in like names in in resumes, whereas like a little
• 8:09
  bit less of what have you done for me lately?
• 8:12
  Until like they're actually on the team, then it's what have
• 8:15
  you done for me lately? And like, super lately, yeah,
• 8:18
  yeah. What did you do for me yesterday
• 8:21
  and what can you do for me tomorrow?
• 8:23
  Yeah, exactly. But they they just want guys
• 8:27
  that are going to help them win games.
• 8:29
  Like right away. It's less of thinking down the
• 8:31
  road and then it's like down the road we'll figure itself out for
• 8:35
  the most part. I think that's a good way to
• 8:37
  live life. It's good to plan, but also
• 8:39
  there's only so far in advance you can plan and predict and
• 8:43
  there's so many question marks. So yeah, there's there's each
• 8:46
  have their pros and cons. Like I think like in Mexico,
• 8:49
  like they're a little too old school.
• 8:51
  I see like guys bunting in really weird situations and I'm
• 8:56
  like, what are you guys doing? It's just good to have to
• 8:58
  balance to have that balance. Whereas like in the states, I
• 9:01
  think sometimes like obviously they're looking so much to the
• 9:03
  future, but guys forget the little intricacies of how to
• 9:07
  play the game or what to look for in a good picture or a
• 9:11
  prospect. Like sometimes there are things
• 9:13
  that you can't necessarily measure or there's there
• 9:16
  requires an eye, there's an eye test.
• 9:18
  I think there's a combination of the eye tests and then also what
• 9:21
  this stats, metrics and analytics say as well, like that
• 9:24
  balance. I think you set us up for
• 9:27
  probably a pretty unique question.
• 9:29
  It's the Billy Bean Moneyball question, at least from the
• 9:32
  movie, not necessarily the book, but from the movie where they
• 9:35
  say, would you have drafted yourself?
• 9:37
  So now all these things that you consider what you just talked
• 9:41
  about, taking that back to you as an 18 year old leaving high
• 9:45
  school, getting popped in the first round.
• 9:47
  What valuation now, looking back, would you have put on
• 9:51
  yourself? That's a that's a good question.
• 9:54
  Small tidbit, my scout that drafted me actually was in the
• 9:58
  movie as an extra in no way in Moneyball.
• 10:02
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, he was in Moneyball the movie.
• 10:04
  But would I have drafted myself? I think back then, yes, just
• 10:09
  because of the amount of rounds there were.
• 10:11
  So you can cut Flyers on guys because I mean, now it would be
• 10:16
  hard to, it would be hard to like draft me because I only
• 10:20
  threw, I think I only pitched like 11 or 12 innings my senior
• 10:24
  year in high school when I was drafted, I did most of my
• 10:27
  pitching and I saw most of my recognition as like a like I'd
• 10:31
  go throw in a scout ball game and it was like I'd throw 1
• 10:34
  inning in a scout ball game and then there'd be all these scouts
• 10:37
  there. So I kind of gained my
• 10:39
  recognition that way. Whereas in season, like I think
• 10:43
  I made like 2 1/2 starts. I say 1/2 start because I think
• 10:47
  I left one of them early because of course I had a back injury
• 10:50
  even in high school. But yeah, I think I had like 2
• 10:53
  1/2 starts and then that was that was it.
• 10:56
  And so I think it would be hard to say, Oh yeah, you could draft
• 10:59
  me. But I definitely could see the
• 11:00
  upside because there was a lot of athleticism there.
• 11:03
  Like I was a leadoff starting center fielder.
• 11:06
  I was really good in center field.
• 11:08
  Bold glove caliber for sure. But yeah, so I would say I
• 11:12
  probably wouldn't now, but I always talk about it too, like
• 11:15
  we didn't have all of the facilities.
• 11:18
  Man, if I had facilities back then you should have seen how
• 11:22
  awful I moved when I was in high school and I was still like
• 11:25
  anywhere from 90 to 94, which back then was absolute.
• 11:30
  Fuzz Yeah, yeah, In 2009 I. Didn't know what the heck I was
• 11:34
  doing. I was like jumping off the
• 11:35
  mound, like really slow tempo. And if you look at how far I've
• 11:40
  come, it's really cool to see all the changes that I've made
• 11:45
  from then to now. But yeah, so short answer would
• 11:48
  be I probably couldn't justify drafting myself in the 20 round
• 11:52
  draft now, but there's a lot of other factors that come into
• 11:55
  play. And I, I guess if you even
• 11:58
  remember back then, did you have a college commitment at that
• 12:00
  time that you were deciding on or was just like, yes, thank
• 12:03
  you, no more school, I'm done, let's go.
• 12:06
  No, what's funny is so I had offers.
• 12:09
  I said I said no to a lot of schools.
• 12:12
  My reasoning was I wanted to go is so silly.
• 12:16
  I wanted to go to a school that had like a football team and a
• 12:20
  lot of the teams in California like UC Irvine, no football
• 12:24
  team, Fullerton, no football team.
• 12:26
  Like I wanted to go to a big school with like a football
• 12:29
  team. So I was waiting for UCLA to
• 12:33
  make me an offer. But by the time I came onto the
• 12:35
  scene, because I was so late onto the scene, they didn't have
• 12:37
  any money left. It was all wrapped up guys, but
• 12:41
  they knew they were gonna get guys drafted.
• 12:43
  They're like, hey, once money opens up, we'll have something
• 12:45
  to offer you. So I was kind of waiting for
• 12:47
  that. Actually, when I got the phone
• 12:49
  call in the 21st round from the Rays, I said thanks, but no
• 12:54
  thanks. I think I'm going to go to
• 12:56
  college. So having the draft around the
• 12:58
  time of like the College World Series is a bad time to do it
• 13:02
  because I was like, I want to be a part of that.
• 13:04
  I want that. And I was very much like, you
• 13:07
  know, I think I want to go to college.
• 13:09
  And they ended up calling me back like a few minutes later
• 13:12
  and they're like, Congrats, we took you with our 21st
• 13:15
  selection. And I was like, but I said I
• 13:18
  said no. And they're like, yeah, we think
• 13:20
  we could work something out. And they knew something I didn't
• 13:23
  know. And because they ended up
• 13:25
  working something out, everyone always asks me, hey, do you,
• 13:28
  like, regret not going to college?
• 13:30
  And I don't regret it at all because baseball is what I
• 13:32
  wanted to do. And I think it set me up in the
• 13:36
  long run of what I wanted to do because even when I'm done
• 13:40
  playing, like I really have a passion for coaching as well.
• 13:43
  So that kind of sets me up. I, I essentially have my, my, my
• 13:48
  masters in, in baseball. You know, I didn't waste all my
• 13:51
  time with the nonsense general Ed education classes and one
• 13:56
  actually I took a few online, but other than that, you know,
• 13:59
  didn't waste much time with that.
• 14:00
  You're not giving yourself enough credit saying you have a
• 14:03
  master's you have a PhD at. This point with all the.
• 14:05
  School you've done in baseball, you, you have certainly done
• 14:08
  enough study abroads and focus groups and seminars and all that
• 14:13
  kind of stuff with everywhere you've been, everything you've
• 14:15
  seen. Now we, we won't spend too much
• 14:18
  time in the past, but given the nature of what we talked about
• 14:22
  on here, with this being such a community for Tommy John UCL
• 14:26
  medial elbow injuries, I'd love if you could at least touch on
• 14:30
  your experience with the injury a little bit, how it came about,
• 14:33
  and I guess what rehab looked like all the way back then.
• 14:37
  Yes. So I got my surgery in July.
• 14:42
  No. Yes, July of actually I think it
• 14:45
  was July 19th even. I didn't even remember the day.
• 14:47
  July 19th, 2012 is when I got the the.
• 14:51
  Surgery. So you were three years in
• 14:53
  already to pro ball at that point?
• 14:55
  So it happened to Yeah 5. And a half, yeah.
• 14:59
  I'm really late in 2009, but yes, it was after like my most
• 15:03
  innings pitch I had and then in the offseason is actually when
• 15:07
  it happened. And I looking back on it, I
• 15:10
  think it had a lot to do with because even back then the
• 15:14
  throwing programs and the build up, I think it was just I went
• 15:18
  full intent before I prepped my arm enough and I think that's
• 15:22
  when I initially injured it. But in terms of like the rehab
• 15:26
  back then, I think I mean, it was super cookie cutter.
• 15:30
  That being said, like whatever, I mean the surgeon did a great
• 15:34
  job because I haven't had any issues with my elbow since, you
• 15:39
  know, I got the surgery in 2012. Any issues that I have had have
• 15:43
  been a little bit like shoulder impingements or things like that
• 15:47
  or even maybe a little bit of tricep, but no elbow stuff.
• 15:50
  So I guess looking from it from a long term perspective, they
• 15:53
  did a great job. How much of it was due to like
• 15:56
  the, the rehab process? I don't know.
• 15:59
  Like that being said, I looking back on it because as a coach,
• 16:03
  like I've worked with some guys coming back from TJ and I think
• 16:08
  monitoring workload is obviously like a really big thing coming
• 16:12
  back from it. One of the big, the biggest
• 16:15
  things I see is it used to be, and I, I see more and more
• 16:19
  people talking about it as well. I, the rehabs were like, hey,
• 16:23
  like we're going to start from 45 feet and then we're going to
• 16:27
  go to 60 feet. And so we would work our way
• 16:30
  back distance wise, but there was no like radar gun on us.
• 16:34
  So I could put air under it and be the same effort from 20 feet
• 16:40
  as I could be from like 60 feet. I was putting no more stress on
• 16:44
  the ligament. And it's funny, I'm just
• 16:47
  rehabbing. I even remember rehabbing my
• 16:49
  shoulder impingement. I didn't have a radar gun
• 16:53
  accessible for a while, so I was just playing catch.
• 16:56
  And I was like, man, I'm starting to feel good.
• 16:58
  Like, you know, let's get in front of a radar gun.
• 17:01
  And I remember throwing and like I thought I was putting a little
• 17:04
  something on it and I was throwing like 70 something miles
• 17:07
  an hour and I was like, holy cow.
• 17:08
  Like I got to start throwing in front of a radar gun because I
• 17:12
  thought I was starting to feel good.
• 17:14
  And I'm still like way farther away than I thought.
• 17:17
  So I think that was probably the biggest eye opening thing in
• 17:21
  terms of like rehab is when I was rehabbing with guys coming
• 17:25
  back from TJ, we monitored workload using the, I'm blanking
• 17:30
  on the the chip that you put on your elbow, the pulse, the
• 17:33
  pulse, it wasn't called pulse back then, but.
• 17:35
  MODIS. You had MODIS back then?
• 17:37
  Yeah, yeah. We we used MODIS, we used radar
• 17:41
  gun and we used to monitor workload pretty precisely just
• 17:46
  to make sure like guys weren't doing too much.
• 17:48
  But I think being able to have like tools like that super
• 17:52
  useful in terms of coming back from the rehab.
• 17:55
  But yeah, for sure, yeah. Well, I appreciate you taking a
• 17:59
  quick stop on that train. We we just had to cover it
• 18:02
  because that was so much of what we talk about here.
• 18:05
  But obviously, or I don't want to say obviously because I know
• 18:08
  you said it was kind of a long rehab to an extent.
• 18:12
  I don't know if it was tumultuous.
• 18:14
  You said you you've felt good ever since, but ultimately you
• 18:17
  got released after your return, correct?
• 18:20
  So how much time did you even have after being cleared and
• 18:24
  healthy and back in games? From TJ with the race, I think I
• 18:28
  threw in like 3, maybe 4 rehab outings.
• 18:32
  I think what scared them partially was I had the yips
• 18:36
  before that and then I kind of got over it.
• 18:38
  Had a really Goodyear was my first time moving into the
• 18:42
  bullpen because I, I was a starter, moved to the bullpen.
• 18:45
  They're like, I went on the Phantom because I had the yips,
• 18:48
  came back, was in the bullpen. Yeah, I had a really Goodyear.
• 18:51
  Then I hurt my arm and then after hurting my arm as I was
• 18:56
  rehabbing it started to act up again, the yips and I think that
• 19:00
  kind of freaked him out a little bit.
• 19:02
  I already kind of fell behind with the the TJ and everything
• 19:06
  because I was still super young and even in my rehab outings, I
• 19:09
  was 9495 maybe touching 6 like as like a 20, 2 year old, like
• 19:17
  coming back from TJ. So, you know, there was a lot to
• 19:20
  like, but I think that probably scared them away.
• 19:23
  But yeah, it was, it definitely lasted.
• 19:27
  I had a couple setbacks here and there, but yeah, I think I got,
• 19:31
  I had three outings and then I was released and then I took
• 19:34
  that, that gap year that I talked about earlier, but that
• 19:37
  was pretty much it. If you can reflect on it, how do
• 19:41
  you think the yips kind of took over for you?
• 19:45
  I know it's funky for a lot of people to talk about, but I I
• 19:48
  have to imagine at your level now as a 34 year old and
• 19:52
  significantly greater problems in this world, IE raising a
• 19:55
  family while pursuing a professional career, Talking
• 19:58
  about where you're throwing the ball is probably like now,
• 20:01
  whatever, that's fine. That's much easier to talk about
• 20:04
  than politics. Like how did it like?
• 20:07
  Encroach on your life. I'm just so fascinated about the
• 20:11
  mental side, the mechanical side of it, and then how you feel you
• 20:15
  remedied the situation. Yes.
• 20:17
  So how I remedied it, I mean, I'll get to that, but it's
• 20:21
  funny, I probably couldn't exactly pinpoint it how it began
• 20:26
  and looking back on it in hindsight, I think it's really
• 20:29
  just like anxiety. I think it's the like
• 20:33
  uncertainty. It's like something happens
• 20:36
  where your trust just breaks down.
• 20:39
  I remember exactly how it happened.
• 20:42
  It sounds like a ridiculous story, but I'll I'll share it
• 20:45
  because it was so long ago and I was so young.
• 20:49
  But I remember I worked out really hard upper body like
• 20:53
  right before like catch play bullpen right before we were
• 20:56
  breaking extended spring training to go to our our
• 21:00
  affiliates. You ever have that pump feeling
• 21:02
  where you could barely grip anything?
• 21:04
  Yes, I had that feeling and I was holding on to a like a
• 21:09
  baseball and I was like, Dang, I could like I have no feel right
• 21:13
  now. I'm playing catch with my
• 21:14
  partner and it is not going well.
• 21:17
  And all the whole time I have like probably the most
• 21:19
  intimidating pitching coach in the whole organization.
• 21:23
  Like this guy's got the resume. Like he's not afraid.
• 21:25
  He's the only coach I've ever just had chew me out.
• 21:29
  Like that being said, like I ended up like really
• 21:32
  appreciating him in the long run.
• 21:34
  Loved him as a as a coach and he had a crazy resume, but he ended
• 21:39
  up he was watching me and he ended up just like chewing me
• 21:44
  out like for my catch play. And of course I had a bullpen
• 21:48
  after that and I just had no feel for where the ball is
• 21:52
  going. It got to the point he was so
• 21:54
  frustrated. He just like called it like cut
• 21:57
  my bullpen short. And it's funny, I didn't think
• 22:00
  about it for days because we had to travel over to our affiliate,
• 22:04
  didn't think about it for days. And then all of a sudden, it's
• 22:07
  like first day of catch, change of scenery, I pick up the ball
• 22:11
  to go play catch with somebody. And it's like all my trust in my
• 22:16
  years and years of playing catch and throwing just out the
• 22:19
  window. And I could not like, play catch
• 22:22
  with my partner. And it's funny, like I had like
• 22:26
  maybe two or three starts that way.
• 22:28
  And somehow I grinded my way through it with the help of that
• 22:31
  same coach. He was my affiliate, like
• 22:34
  pitching coach at that time. His name was Marty Demerit, by
• 22:37
  the way. We called him Dog.
• 22:38
  He was, I'm so thankful for him as a pitching coach.
• 22:41
  But yeah, like I remember I would like, strike out eight,
• 22:45
  like walk six guys in in like 4 innings.
• 22:49
  And it's funny, like it was a matter of just time and trust in
• 22:54
  rebuilding that trust of, of playing catch.
• 22:57
  And when I threw it, it was going to go where I wanted it
• 22:59
  to. And I had a pitching coach here
• 23:01
  that worked with me through it. And he was just like, hey, just
• 23:05
  let it go. Like I don't care where it goes.
• 23:07
  And having that safe environment, I think.
• 23:10
  And then I also realized like, hey, like I also kind of have
• 23:14
  anxiety issues off the field. So helping with the overall like
• 23:18
  chemical balance, getting on the right medication in general, I
• 23:21
  think just kind of helped me on the field as well as realizing,
• 23:25
  hey, I got some, I got some stuff off the field that I
• 23:27
  didn't even realize I had until I started boiling it down and
• 23:31
  talking about it. So definitely an interesting
• 23:34
  situation and I've dealt with a lot of other guys.
• 23:37
  I feel like guys go through it. Everybody has like some form of
• 23:41
  it maybe like once in their career.
• 23:43
  Like if you talk to guys, they're like, Oh yeah, I've been
• 23:45
  through, you know, I had, you know, one form of it or another
• 23:49
  like throughout my career. It's pretty crazy.
• 23:52
  That's quite the vehicle though, for you to figure out that
• 23:55
  something like Yips within the game was somewhat linked
• 24:00
  possibly to other things going on in life outside in the real
• 24:04
  world. And I mean, props to you for
• 24:07
  going, getting it taken care of. Whether it's talking to someone
• 24:10
  about it or medication, the first step is admitting it.
• 24:14
  So I mean, that's, that's huge. Yeah, it was easy to admit it.
• 24:17
  It kind of hit me in the face, but.
• 24:19
  When you saw it, Yeah. Well, it hit me in the face and
• 24:23
  then it got to a point where it was like, I all right, I need to
• 24:25
  address this. So I think life kind of forced
• 24:28
  my hand on that. But yeah, no, it was.
• 24:32
  It's definitely been a thorn in my side, but has also taught me
• 24:35
  a lot, I think over the years. And then being able to
• 24:39
  prioritize things and like you said, like having the family now
• 24:43
  and then talking about the yips. That being said, like when
• 24:46
  you're in a season and like you're so engulfed in it that it
• 24:51
  is easy to get lost in perspective of things in the
• 24:55
  moment of when you're in season. And then realizing, hey, like
• 25:00
  the priority of me even being here isn't, you know, for the
• 25:04
  sake of playing. It's like, you know, I have
• 25:06
  other priorities like my family and my faith that take priority
• 25:10
  over this. And being able to prioritize
• 25:13
  that helps put into perspective like it's just a game.
• 25:16
  It's easy to say, hard to do. I've learned that for sure.
• 25:19
  Assessing magnitudes of situations are incredibly
• 25:22
  difficult when you are in the situation.
• 25:25
  Of course you can sit on your couch now, two weeks or whatever
• 25:29
  removed from the LMB season in evaluate what was important,
• 25:34
  what wasn't, what actually impacted you and what didn't.
• 25:38
  Versus if you were on the bus right now to the stadium, the
• 25:42
  music being turned up too loud could impact your day or
• 25:46
  something like that. It's crazy to think how simple
• 25:48
  of things can weigh so heavy when you are in it.
• 25:53
  Yeah, it is. It is crazy.
• 25:55
  There's a man, I'm, I'm about to butcher this.
• 25:57
  So you might, this might be one of those editing parts, but
• 26:00
  we'll see. No, I mean, it's so everyone's
• 26:03
  probably heard of them. It's like a story of like a book
• 26:06
  by CS Lewis called Mere Christianity.
• 26:08
  He talks about like good people, like bad people don't realize
• 26:13
  that they're bad. It's like good people realize
• 26:16
  how bad they are because they're trying to be good the same way
• 26:20
  like a drunk person doesn't realize how drunk they are while
• 26:24
  they're drunk. It's kind of like, like that
• 26:25
  same thing. It's like when you're in it, you
• 26:27
  don't realize like that, that you're in it like, or, or
• 26:32
  you're, you're unable to put a correct perspective on it when
• 26:36
  you're in it, cuz you're so like, this is your life right
• 26:38
  now, you know, so it's really easy to get lost and things like
• 26:42
  that. And, and, and it's really
• 26:44
  important to think like long in situations like that.
• 26:48
  It's important to reflect on the past, be like, all right, I've
• 26:51
  gotten through similar things like this and then to look to
• 26:54
  the future and be like, hey, like there's a lot more
• 26:58
  important things. This is what goals I have in
• 27:01
  life. It's not like these little silly
• 27:04
  things that I got going on right now, if that makes.
• 27:07
  Sense, Yeah, yeah. So what are ways that you step
• 27:10
  away or reset or take those moments like how, how do you
• 27:14
  enter that place where you can take the time of reflection?
• 27:19
  Yeah. I mean, for me personally, at
• 27:20
  the risk of turning your podcast into a sermon, I mean, I pray
• 27:24
  and I, you know, read. I get into the word and it helps
• 27:29
  me put things into perspective and things that are really
• 27:33
  important. And then when I talk about like
• 27:35
  thinking about the future, like putting perspective, like of
• 27:39
  life in eternal perspective as opposed to the 70 or 80 years
• 27:44
  that I have here really helps me put these 70 to 80 years, God
• 27:50
  willing, that I have in this life.
• 27:53
  Thinking about that eternal perspective helps me, you know,
• 27:57
  really put into perspective and boil down what's important to do
• 28:01
  right here, right now, because most of those things aren't
• 28:04
  going to matter in 500 years or whatever, however you think
• 28:09
  about it, if that makes sense. I guess where I'm headed with
• 28:12
  this question. So yeah, of course, of course I
• 28:15
  want you to share everything that's important to you.
• 28:17
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I guess it's like, when are
• 28:20
  you doing this? Is it as simple as like you're
• 28:23
  getting ready for the shower? Is it like every night before
• 28:27
  you, you go to bed? Cuz like I, I am a huge
• 28:32
  proponent of anybody should do anything that they believe in
• 28:36
  wholeheartedly. And I know how entrenched you
• 28:40
  are in your faith and how much it means to you.
• 28:43
  But then obviously you need to make time for these things.
• 28:46
  So it's not just saying like, I pray.
• 28:48
  So like when, when are you able to do these things?
• 28:52
  When you also have to think about facing Robinson Cano.
• 28:56
  Yeah. So I would say when I do that,
• 29:00
  well, the beauty of it is I kind of do it just through throughout
• 29:04
  the day when I'm going well. So when I'm getting caught up in
• 29:08
  things that are aren't important in life and I'm not going well,
• 29:14
  I would say I do it less and I could go a whole day.
• 29:18
  And then I lay down at night and I'm like, man, you know, I don't
• 29:23
  think I talked to God once today or I didn't pray.
• 29:27
  And it's like when I'm going, well, it's just throughout my
• 29:29
  day, you hear about, like people say, oh, you know, like you're
• 29:33
  able to walk through this life with God.
• 29:36
  And, and I think that's kind of how I do it.
• 29:39
  Like I, he's always in my mind, in my thoughts when I'm in a
• 29:43
  good spot. And I really noticed the
• 29:45
  difference about the peace and the perspective and then how I'm
• 29:49
  able to have relationships and speak to others, care for them,
• 29:53
  not try to, you know, see what I can get from other people, but
• 29:58
  really care about them first and foremost.
• 30:00
  I'm able to be loving towards others when I realize how much,
• 30:04
  you know, God loved me first. And I would say, yeah, it's,
• 30:08
  it's no one specific time when I'm going well, it's just
• 30:11
  throughout my day. It's even, you know, at times on
• 30:15
  the mound, you know, quick reflections or, you know, quick
• 30:19
  prayers. And when I'm not going well,
• 30:21
  like I'm trying to do things on my own.
• 30:23
  And I've done that throughout my life plenty of times.
• 30:26
  And things don't go very well for me when I'm trying to do
• 30:29
  things on my own. I have a track, a good track
• 30:32
  record of not doing things very well when I choose to do them my
• 30:36
  way. So yeah, I would say the the
• 30:38
  short answer would be just, you know, more frequently when I'm
• 30:41
  going well and not very often when I'm not going well, if that
• 30:45
  makes sense. I appreciate you opening up on
• 30:47
  that. Yeah, everyone has their own
• 30:50
  process and I do think that's valuable to at least understand
• 30:53
  your insight and how how it guides you through your life for
• 30:56
  sure. And now kind of like re
• 30:59
  anchoring to this timeline that we're working through as well.
• 31:02
  I want to go back now to this period without baseball, I
• 31:07
  guess, or I mean, before we even get to that.
• 31:09
  We had your gap year. We had the battles through Indy
• 31:12
  ball going and playing in Joplin.
• 31:14
  I'm assuming Joplin, MO. Joplin, MO.
• 31:17
  Okay, yeah, so playing in Joplin, MO, was that the
• 31:20
  American Association at the time?
• 31:22
  It was the American Association. All right.
• 31:25
  And I mean great league when it comes to the Indy ball side of
• 31:28
  things in the States. I mean, that's that's basically
• 31:31
  as high as you can get it for American Indy ball.
• 31:34
  And how were you playing at the time?
• 31:36
  How did you feel about your game taking that gap year per SE?
• 31:40
  Training with someone, playing in some like low pressure
• 31:43
  outings and then moving into pro ball again?
• 31:48
  Yeah, I mean, it's funny you say low pressure outings because I
• 31:51
  didn't feel that way when I was in it.
• 31:53
  It's like one of those things like you think, you know, I'm an
• 31:55
  indie ball, like I could take a step back, but pressure is
• 31:58
  always like what you put on yourself, and I've always done a
• 32:01
  good job of being able to put a lot of pressure.
• 32:04
  On myself. Well, then let me clarify real
• 32:06
  quick. I, I by no means mean that the
• 32:08
  American Association is low pressure.
• 32:11
  I'm more mean when you said you threw in some of those college
• 32:13
  summer ball outings. That's what I tried to say was
• 32:16
  low pressure. If you think that was high
• 32:18
  pressure, then maybe we should re anchor this anxiety
• 32:21
  discussion after you like made it up to high A or AA or
• 32:26
  whatever as a 22 year old. But hopefully those were low
• 32:29
  pressure. But the American Association on
• 32:31
  the other hand, no, that's high pressure.
• 32:33
  Yeah, no. So the gap year, gap year was
• 32:36
  awesome and it was cool because I was able to throw in like
• 32:40
  these collegiate summer league games and work on stuff.
• 32:44
  Whereas like now you see guys taking gap years and they're in
• 32:47
  a facility, we're going through our Velo phase and whatnot.
• 32:50
  So it was cool to be able to compete.
• 32:52
  And then I was feeling really good about myself during that
• 32:55
  time because that's when I kind of had my biggest leap in terms
• 33:00
  of like velocity during the gap year.
• 33:02
  It was the first time I was like 95 to 98 and I was like, dude,
• 33:07
  like, why am I not getting signed?
• 33:09
  I'm still young. And then I got to the point
• 33:13
  where it's like, all right, I just got to go play somewhere.
• 33:15
  And then that's when I went to Joplin.
• 33:17
  And when I was in Joplin was, you know, I was, I was the, I
• 33:21
  was the rookie and I was like, dude, I just spent like five
• 33:25
  years in extended spring training.
• 33:27
  Like I felt like I paid my dues. And now I'm just like a rookie
• 33:30
  again, Like, holy cow. Like, granted, there are a lot
• 33:33
  of older guys on the team. We had former big leaguers and
• 33:36
  stuff. So looking back on it, it's
• 33:38
  like, yeah, I was a rookie, but I was still stuck in between
• 33:42
  that like starter reliever role, which was like really
• 33:46
  frustrating. It's really difficult to go back
• 33:48
  and forth, back and forth. But I mean, that was the first
• 33:52
  time I was up to 100, like 99100.
• 33:57
  But during that time you could still get lost in the shuffle
• 34:01
  and indie ball because you didn't have, you know, track man
• 34:04
  data for guys to go look at. Like they had to be there to see
• 34:08
  you or have the word amount. And then they look at the stats
• 34:11
  and it would be like the the ERA or whatever back then they cared
• 34:15
  about ERA. The ERA looks good.
• 34:17
  You know, strikeouts are good, but you know, the the walks are
• 34:21
  a little high. And it's like I would always
• 34:22
  have stints during my starts where I a blow up game and it's
• 34:26
  like I'd walk the house and then my walks would blow up.
• 34:29
  So it was a little frustrating, but it was it was only three
• 34:32
  guys in Joplin that made it start to finish.
• 34:35
  And it was me, our setup guy and our closer.
• 34:38
  Everybody else got either released or hurt.
• 34:42
  The amount of like transactions were insane.
• 34:46
  The only guys, I should rephrase that, all the only pictures that
• 34:49
  made it from start to finish. So that was an accomplishment in
• 34:52
  itself. And then I was, I did have a lot
• 34:54
  of interest and then when I went to go play winter ball in
• 34:57
  Australia, it was actually through the interests of a
• 35:01
  Rangers scout because the manager of the team was a coach
• 35:05
  in the Rangers organization. So I went to go play for them
• 35:08
  and then when I came back to Joplin, the manager and the
• 35:13
  owners, like I've had a lot of teams, like reaching out about
• 35:15
  you. We think you have a couple good
• 35:17
  outings and you're out of here. So I was super encouraged at the
• 35:20
  time. And then of course, the day
• 35:22
  before opening day, my shoulder had been bothering me.
• 35:25
  Like it got to the point it's like I got to say something
• 35:27
  because I was going to pitch that night.
• 35:29
  I don't think I could pitch. And then that's when I ended up
• 35:32
  going home and then going home to rehab.
• 35:36
  And like I said, that's when I met my wife and kind of just put
• 35:40
  baseball on hold. To sum up that kind of that gap
• 35:43
  here in that indie ball year, I guess that that be the best way
• 35:46
  to do it. Okay and now we may have entered
• 35:50
  the time of the conversation where I get really selfish Yes,
• 35:54
  that is for the audience. The reason for this.
• 35:57
  I think most of you who have stuck with us through the
• 36:00
  process and are consistent listeners know that I have a
• 36:04
  baby on the way At the time of this interview we are 10 days
• 36:07
  prior to due date but she could come at any time.
• 36:11
  Now I'm having a baby girl Swilly here is girl dad himself
• 36:15
  times a couple. He's surrounded by females in
• 36:19
  his household and a lot of what I wanted to talk to him about
• 36:23
  besides him telling his story and his illustrious career in
• 36:27
  baseball thus far. Hoping that there's a movie
• 36:30
  about it soon enough when when he gets that show call one day.
• 36:33
  But is how he is managed life as well as his pursuits for his
• 36:39
  passion. He obviously went home.
• 36:42
  We got to this point and this is what I really wanted to get
• 36:45
  into. He separated from, but as far as
• 36:49
  I can see on the outside, without living it.
• 36:52
  He made this separation from baseball and really started to
• 36:56
  pursue other things in life, development of his family,
• 36:59
  meeting his wife, having kids. So now I'm so interested in what
• 37:06
  happens from here. What was the shift?
• 37:09
  Was there an identity thing for you?
• 37:11
  Or. What ultimately was the reason
• 37:14
  that you took the step away to focus on family at that time?
• 37:19
  Yeah. Well, first of all, big
• 37:21
  Congrats, brother. I didn't.
• 37:22
  I didn't realize. 10 days away. Oh, yeah, we're right here.
• 37:25
  Let's go, man. Thank you.
• 37:26
  Super exciting. All right, Yeah.
• 37:28
  So this is a good time for this interview, then hopefully I can
• 37:32
  give you some wisdom. I could definitely tell you a
• 37:34
  lot of things not to do. That's good.
• 37:36
  That's good as well. Yeah, I paid a lot of, I like to
• 37:39
  call it dumb tax for you, so hopefully you don't have to pay
• 37:43
  it. I figured out a lot of things
• 37:45
  not to do. Still figuring out a lot of
• 37:47
  things to do, doing my best through it.
• 37:50
  You're never ready for it. I just think that.
• 37:53
  So like like I said, I went home and and that's when I met my
• 37:56
  wife and you have a lot of downtime rehabbing.
• 37:59
  I spent obviously I told you about the time rehabbing the TJ,
• 38:03
  then I, when I went home to rehab the shoulder.
• 38:06
  You have a lot of downtime and it's kind of a lot of alone time
• 38:09
  too. And you have a lot of time to
• 38:11
  reflect as well as like you're an athlete, you're not playing
• 38:15
  what you've done your whole life.
• 38:16
  So it can be a little depressing at times.
• 38:19
  And then you start to really reflect on like what's important
• 38:22
  to you. And when I met my wife, like it
• 38:25
  was sparks right away, mainly for her and I'm just kidding,
• 38:31
  for both of us. That's.
• 38:32
  Staying in, Yeah. Yeah, it was going to be, do I
• 38:37
  leave? I think at the time I was
• 38:39
  262526. And it's like what's important
• 38:43
  to me, I always just assumed that I wanted a family.
• 38:47
  Before I met my wife, I didn't even have a girlfriend.
• 38:50
  And it's like, I want a family, but when is this going to
• 38:53
  happen? We were just together and and I
• 38:55
  got to a point where I was just like, I chose to pursue the
• 39:00
  relationship instead of baseball.
• 39:03
  And the people always ask me, oh, do you regret that?
• 39:06
  And I always joke with my wife, I'm like, you know, I'd probably
• 39:08
  be in the big leagues right now. Like, if it wasn't, she goes
• 39:12
  don't say that Like you think so.
• 39:13
  I was like, yeah, probably. And now she goes to therapy for
• 39:18
  that. Right.
• 39:22
  But yeah, it's funny because it ended up being both the best
• 39:26
  thing in terms of enjoyment, but also in terms of probably just
• 39:30
  growth. I don't know how I would be or
• 39:32
  who I would be had I just stayed in baseball because it's a very
• 39:36
  like it's less so an indie ball, but it's still a very like
• 39:40
  sheltered lifestyle. And I and I talked to guys now
• 39:44
  who are in their 30s and or even almost 40.
• 39:47
  All it all they've done is baseball their whole lives.
• 39:50
  And there's a lot like having that life experience outside of
• 39:55
  baseball. It helped me develop different
• 39:58
  skills and perspective on things.
• 40:01
  I think that I'm really truly grateful for.
• 40:04
  Even when I was waiting tables, like holy cow, like be nice to
• 40:08
  your waiters and your baristas at Starbucks because I did both
• 40:11
  of those things. And people can be brutal and
• 40:14
  just learning the life skills that came along with that.
• 40:17
  But I think having that perspective.
• 40:20
  Of outside of baseball and then diving back into baseball, it's
• 40:25
  funny because before it was a very selfish mindset, especially
• 40:29
  when you're first thrusted into pro ball.
• 40:31
  It's like, all right, what can I do to advance my career?
• 40:33
  The career and yourself is primarily all you think about,
• 40:37
  which probably not, probably. It's definitely not the best way
• 40:41
  to think about things. And it probably led to a lot of
• 40:44
  the anxiety that I had in a lot of the issues that I had playing
• 40:48
  wise with the yips and whatnot, because I made baseball more
• 40:52
  than what it was. But yeah, now, yes, the identity
• 40:55
  shift, it's like now when I go anywhere, it's like it's always
• 40:58
  in the back of my head. It's like I'm a father and I'm a
• 41:01
  husband first and foremost. And it's like I represent my
• 41:04
  family whenever I come into contact with anybody, teammates,
• 41:08
  how I carry myself on the field. Like it's like I'm I represent
• 41:12
  my family. And yeah, those are, are big
• 41:14
  things in terms of like an identity shift, I guess.
• 41:17
  And then in terms of how to manage that, that I would say
• 41:21
  the biggest thing in terms of being able to manage the family
• 41:25
  life and having to be away and pursuing your dreams is to have
• 41:31
  a very supportive life because she's doing a lot of the heavy
• 41:35
  lifting when you're not there. And it makes you appreciate and
• 41:39
  treasure the, the moments that you do and the time that you do
• 41:43
  have with your family. So whether that be, you know,
• 41:45
  scheduling the FaceTime calls, thank God for FaceTime.
• 41:49
  And just always whenever you are in contact with your kids and
• 41:53
  whenever they're seeing you do certain things to make sure that
• 41:56
  you're, you're setting those good examples because the kids
• 41:59
  imitate everything and anything that you do.
• 42:02
  I always tell people this because it was the best advice
• 42:05
  that I ever heard to be a good father to your kids.
• 42:09
  The best way that you can go about doing that is to be a good
• 42:13
  husband, like putting your wife first.
• 42:15
  Like you're never going to, you know, later on in life, your
• 42:18
  kids are always going to reflect on the fact of how well you
• 42:21
  treated your wife. And they're also going, it's
• 42:24
  going to impact them and affect them in so many ways down the
• 42:27
  road that you don't even realize.
• 42:29
  But that's probably the most and you don't think about it
• 42:33
  because, and a lot of people tend to put their kids first and
• 42:36
  it's not the right way to do it, especially in our culture today,
• 42:39
  for whatever reason, like we put our kids first and then a lot of
• 42:42
  parents or husbands, husbands and wives get lost in being
• 42:45
  parents 1st and then they kind of like lose the relationship
• 42:49
  aspect. And it's really important to
• 42:51
  nurture that first. And then the kids like as much
• 42:54
  as you love them, but the kids are second, like on the totem
• 42:57
  pole, it goes spouse and then kids.
• 42:59
  And it's best for them because the relationship that you have
• 43:04
  with your kids obviously is for the rest of your life.
• 43:06
  But the relationship that you have with your spouses, you guys
• 43:10
  are bound together for, you know, for the rest of your lives
• 43:13
  and you know, the kids, eventually you're going to go
• 43:15
  off. But that relationship that you
• 43:17
  have with your spouse is first and foremost, like most
• 43:20
  important and it's most important in your kids life.
• 43:23
  So yeah, when I'm when I'm home, I definitely, it's funny, I
• 43:26
  always go through like a honeymoon phase when I'm first
• 43:29
  home and it's like I just treasure everything.
• 43:32
  And then it's like a week passes and then the whining starts to
• 43:36
  creep in with like the I got toddlers now and like they start
• 43:40
  whining and it's like, all right, like you guys whine kind
• 43:42
  of a lot. Like we got to work on that.
• 43:46
  But yeah, no, I think perspective, like identity
• 43:51
  perspective and how that impacts like baseball and stuff like all
• 43:55
  of that, like really ties together for there's, there's
• 43:59
  definitely a lot to tackle in that for sure.
• 44:01
  And it's something if there's things that I'm passionate about
• 44:04
  and long winded about, it's my faith and my family and
• 44:09
  baseball, like there's three things that I can go on and on
• 44:12
  about. It's it's probably those three
• 44:14
  things. I don't have too many hobbies
• 44:16
  outside of those. You don't have time for hobbies
• 44:19
  at this point. Yeah, honestly, I don't.
• 44:22
  I don't wish I'm for hobbies. Also in this process, you
• 44:26
  mentioned it way earlier, you were starting the business with
• 44:29
  your buddy. I know we highlighted it
• 44:30
  quickly, but coming off of this hiatus from pro ball, how long
• 44:36
  did it take you to start to get that itch to start training guys
• 44:40
  or coaching? And maybe how long were you back
• 44:43
  home as well? Yeah, so it's funny, I did like
• 44:46
  little lessons here and there with some younger kids and I
• 44:49
  just did and like a lot, a lot of people do.
• 44:51
  I just did what like my pitching coach did with me.
• 44:54
  This is what how I was taught. This is how I taught.
• 44:57
  And then I met actually first I went to I went to driveline.
• 45:01
  I finally, I didn't, I went to driveline because I was super
• 45:05
  interested in like motion capture because I when I was
• 45:08
  younger, I would like think about like mechanics a lot and
• 45:11
  how it affected like velocity and like the throw and control.
• 45:15
  And it's like, I want to get a motion capture because I feel
• 45:18
  like I'm throwing darts to a dartboard and I at least swat
• 45:21
  let dart board not to be so big. Like I want to narrow things
• 45:25
  down a little bit. And I went pretty much primarily
• 45:28
  for the the motion capture. Oh yeah, I forgot to, I left
• 45:31
  this part out. This was like after I threw in
• 45:33
  like a men's league game. OK, But yes, like I'm gonna pick
• 45:37
  up a baseball again and we're gonna see where we're at.
• 45:40
  My buddies talked me into playing men's league.
• 45:42
  I was like shortstop super. It was super fun and they're
• 45:46
  like, hey, like, can you pitch? And I was like, like, I'll throw
• 45:49
  an inning, like I'll close if you need to.
• 45:52
  Picked up a baseball was still like 9495 after 0 struggling in
• 45:57
  like 9:00 AM like men's league game.
• 46:00
  I was like, dude, like maybe you know, there's something to this.
• 46:03
  And then that kind of led into the going to driveline, checking
• 46:08
  out the motion capture, seeing like kind of where I can take it
• 46:12
  when I was out there with the motion capture, they're like,
• 46:14
  what team do you play for? Like what organization are you
• 46:17
  with? I was like, I'm not with an
• 46:18
  organization, but like men's league.
• 46:21
  And they they're just like really, they're like you could
• 46:23
  throw in our pro day. And I was like, there's a pro
• 46:25
  day. Like sure, I'll throw in your
• 46:27
  pro day. What year was this by the?
• 46:29
  Way 2019. So I threw.
• 46:32
  It was January 2020. And you threw in the pro day.
• 46:36
  Wonderful, yes, When I threw in the pro day and I was starting
• 46:40
  to make that comeback. And then, of course, right
• 46:43
  around that time, Kovid hit after and then baseball got shut
• 46:47
  down and I was like, all right, I guess I'm done again.
• 46:49
  Back to the lab, Yeah. Yeah, like at that point I was
• 46:52
  like, no ones playing. I gave it a go, Kovid hit.
• 46:56
  So I'm probably pretty much done.
• 46:57
  And then that's when I came home and I met my buddy.
• 47:02
  There was somebody out there at Driveline and I was talking to
• 47:06
  him. He's from my area.
• 47:07
  And I was like, hey, like, where can I go to like continue like
• 47:10
  some of the stuff that we do here, Like I don't know of any
• 47:13
  places back home in the San Diego area.
• 47:16
  And he was just like my my high school coach.
• 47:19
  And I was like, your high school coach like he's like, yeah, just
• 47:22
  just hit him up. So it's funny.
• 47:23
  I hit him up when I got back and I read I was like you got you
• 47:28
  have like radar gun LED board. He's like, yeah, just just come.
• 47:31
  I got everything. So it's funny, like I go there,
• 47:34
  it was out of height is the high school field and I start
• 47:37
  throwing. He's got like a suite set up.
• 47:39
  He's got the plyo walls. This is way before all of this
• 47:42
  stuff got really, really big. Now there's a ton of places in
• 47:45
  this area, but he had all the plyo walls.
• 47:48
  Just anything you could think of.
• 47:50
  I started throwing my bullpen dudes flying a drone over my
• 47:54
  head, like getting like footage from overhead.
• 47:56
  I was like, who is this guy? But yeah, like I kept going
• 48:00
  there. He kept training, getting ready
• 48:02
  for the pro day when I got home from driveline.
• 48:05
  And we just ended up kind of becoming friends.
• 48:08
  And then once I stopped throwing because of COVID, we kind of
• 48:12
  around this time during COVID. So he he was hired by the Royals
• 48:16
  as like in between guy for the analytics and the coaching side.
• 48:20
  He was kind of like the mediator.
• 48:22
  It was a new position. Like the original player
• 48:25
  development roles. Yes, exactly.
• 48:28
  It was a new role at the time. And then when COVID hit, because
• 48:31
  he was a new hire, first guys to go were were those guys.
• 48:35
  So he came, he was coming back home and he was like, dude, you
• 48:38
  want to get started on something.
• 48:40
  And that's kind of how the ball got rolling with the training
• 48:43
  guys. He had somewhat of a clientele
• 48:46
  already because he was a high school coach before that in the
• 48:49
  area and two of them actually are in pro ball now and we're
• 48:55
  very high draft picks. That's how it kind of started
• 48:57
  when we started training guys and we did that.
• 49:00
  We bounced around spots for a couple years.
• 49:03
  We rented space out of like this gym where the other half of the
• 49:07
  gym was like just badminton courts, like those batten and
• 49:11
  then us and like a gym. We rented that out for a while.
• 49:15
  Then we went to another spot, which was like a kids batting
• 49:18
  cage, but we rented out space there.
• 49:20
  And then eventually we went to, we kind of just started working
• 49:24
  out of the high school because we had access and he was
• 49:26
  coaching and we were able to. And right around that time is
• 49:30
  when I started throwing again. And then he got that other job
• 49:34
  offer from the the Tigers, which he's still with the Tigers.
• 49:39
  So but yeah, that's kind of how that went about between the me
• 49:44
  trying to make a comeback. It's funny though, the what gave
• 49:47
  me the itch to start throwing again was actually due to my old
• 49:51
  scout that signed me when I was out of high school.
• 49:54
  We still keep in touch. Great guy, I just consider him a
• 49:58
  friend now. We keep in touch when we can,
• 50:00
  but he reached out to me after the pro day with the driveline
• 50:05
  because he was there and he was like, hey, man, I've been
• 50:08
  thinking about you a lot, had meetings with the scouting
• 50:11
  department and player development.
• 50:12
  And you keep popping into my head because you definitely fit
• 50:16
  the mold of the type of pictures that they're talking about and
• 50:20
  we're looking for. Are you still throwing?
• 50:22
  And at the time, it was funny. It was on my like during my 30th
• 50:26
  birthday, I was in quarantine for COVID while he's texting me.
• 50:31
  And I was like, well, I'm not, but I can throw again.
• 50:34
  And because I had access to everything, you know, because we
• 50:38
  were in a facility at that, we were at that badminton facility
• 50:40
  at that time. And that's when I just slowly
• 50:43
  started to incorporate the things that I had learned and
• 50:47
  start my own throwing program and started to build back up
• 50:51
  again. And then I just kept them
• 50:53
  updated throughout the process of when I was throwing.
• 50:56
  And eventually, like I got to a point where I was feeling really
• 50:59
  good. I was in bullpens.
• 51:00
  I was consistently like 9697. And then I was like, all right,
• 51:05
  like let's get into a game. Got into a game and nobody was
• 51:09
  supposed to be there. It was in Palm Springs, it's
• 51:12
  like 2 hours away from me. Went to a game in Palm Springs,
• 51:15
  collegiate summer league game, no one's supposed to be there.
• 51:18
  There ended up being a Ranger scout there to scout and the
• 51:21
  starting pitcher for that team. I was, I ended up, I threw one
• 51:24
  inning, I was 97 to 99, struck out the side and after the game
• 51:30
  the Rangers guys like who are you?
• 51:32
  Like reached out to me. That's kind of when the ball
• 51:34
  started rolling for me getting looks in terms of signing again.
• 51:39
  And I just threw bullpen after bullpen.
• 51:41
  The Rangers flew me out to throw in their pre draft showcase
• 51:45
  where I was throwing with a bunch of college and high school
• 51:48
  kids and they're calling me the rookie.
• 51:50
  And then a few months down the road during the offseason is
• 51:54
  actually when I signed with the the Padres and actually How I
• 51:58
  Met you so. Yeah, right, Yeah, yeah.
• 52:00
  So we we got to the Padres point of the podcast and that really
• 52:05
  just had to be so cool. Such a surreal moment to get a
• 52:09
  contract from the local team. I'm sure that's who you were a
• 52:13
  fan of growing up, knowing you're a San Diego guy.
• 52:16
  What did that feel like? Forget about baseball for a
• 52:18
  moment on the human side. What was that like?
• 52:21
  I was just really excited. It seemed like at the time,
• 52:24
  having been separated from baseball for so long and being
• 52:27
  so close and not signing with so many teams during that time, it
• 52:32
  seemed it was like pretty surreal and it felt like, wow,
• 52:34
  this happened. Like anything could happen
• 52:36
  originally. Like talked about being assigned
• 52:39
  to AA. It's like if I pitch good there
• 52:41
  a couple months down the road, who knows, Like I could be in
• 52:43
  the big leagues. And I just remember all these
• 52:45
  thoughts going through my head, maybe got a little too ahead of
• 52:48
  myself. But it was it was super cool
• 52:50
  because during that time away from playing baseball, I kind of
• 52:54
  regained a little bit of my fandom with watching baseball
• 52:57
  again because when you're playing, you don't watch as
• 52:59
  much. But I started to regain that
• 53:01
  fandom and that appreciation again and then to also dive back
• 53:06
  into playing again while being a fan.
• 53:08
  Like it was just super cool. And I've kind of, I try to
• 53:12
  nurture and like keep as much as that fandom still as I can in
• 53:16
  terms of like watching baseball and just enjoying it, you know,
• 53:20
  because you kind of become like a little bit jaded about it and
• 53:24
  the business side of things and the politics of it all, like
• 53:28
  when you're playing. But just to kind of keep that
• 53:30
  perspective is a cool perspective.
• 53:32
  But it was unreal and definitely a surreal moment, like when I
• 53:35
  signed with the Padres. For sure.
• 53:36
  And you were eventually assigned to Lake Elsinore, so not die,
• 53:41
  but you were a little bit down the road.
• 53:43
  Were you able to live at home or commute, or what did that look
• 53:47
  like for you? So I commute at home as much as
• 53:50
  I could. There was off days every Monday,
• 53:53
  so after Sunday games I would go home and then spend the night,
• 53:58
  come back on Tuesdays, come home like random days when I could.
• 54:02
  It was still a little ways away and it was a long commute, like
• 54:05
  if I wanted to come all the way home.
• 54:07
  It was funny. Our manager at the time lived
• 54:09
  really close to where I live and he he made the commute every day
• 54:14
  and I was like dude, I don't know how you do that.
• 54:16
  You had jungle, right? Yeah.
• 54:18
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where days, yeah.
• 54:20
  Days that he wasn't sleeping in the office, he'd go home.
• 54:23
  But yeah. So I would make that commute as
• 54:25
  much as I could. And that was actually one of the
• 54:26
  things we talked about because I remember it's crazy the process
• 54:30
  of how they, like, tell you where you're going at the end of
• 54:32
  spring training. I remember just seeing like,
• 54:34
  first I looked at the AA roster and I was like, like, no, at
• 54:37
  first I looked at the AAA roster roster knew I probably wasn't
• 54:39
  going to be there. I'm like, all right.
• 54:41
  Then I looked at the AA roster. Just post it on the wall in the
• 54:44
  locker room like you like you're in high school if you made the
• 54:47
  varsity. I look at the AA and and I go, I
• 54:50
  couldn't find my name. And I was like, really?
• 54:52
  And I was like, like, I guess I must be going to Fort Wayne like
• 54:56
  Hyatt. And I looked and it wasn't
• 54:58
  there. And I almost didn't even look
• 55:00
  like at the I was like, maybe they forgot my name.
• 55:03
  Look at the low way. Sure enough, Lake Elsinore,
• 55:08
  there was my name and I just I was like, dude, I'm 31 at the
• 55:12
  time. I was like, I'm going to low
• 55:14
  way. Ended up having a a talk with a
• 55:18
  couple of the guys in the org and it made complete sense.
• 55:20
  They're like, we like you. We don't want to get rid of you.
• 55:24
  We also don't know what to do with you.
• 55:26
  We don't want to we don't want to send you to Fort Wayne
• 55:29
  because I was in a weird spot, you know, I didn't play in
• 55:31
  years. They wanted me to get my innings
• 55:33
  in, get my feet wet. They're like, we don't want to
• 55:35
  send you to Fort Wayne Like we figured like we'd send you close
• 55:39
  to home. That was one of the reasons.
• 55:40
  So I appreciated that actually, I could be closer to the family.
• 55:44
  I got as many innings in there as I could, but they were a
• 55:48
  little rocky because I was dealing with a little bit of a
• 55:51
  shoulder impingement at the time, before I even ever made it
• 55:54
  out of there and made it to AA or AAA, which is what was the
• 55:58
  plan, go Lake Elsinore, throw well, you throw well, you go to
• 56:02
  AA or AAA. But got hurt.
• 56:05
  It affected how I was pitching as well.
• 56:07
  Never made get out of there. Went home to rehab the rest of
• 56:10
  the year and then contract expired.
• 56:13
  The dream didn't exactly go as planned, but not many things in
• 56:18
  life do. So you just keep keep going.
• 56:21
  I actually thought I might be done at that time, but here I am
• 56:25
  still playing. Yeah, I wasn't.
• 56:28
  But I'm assuming your family was finally at least able to see you
• 56:33
  pitch at that time. Yeah, they, they made the trip a
• 56:36
  couple times to the stadium, which was pretty cool.
• 56:40
  I think the times that they came, I didn't pitch, but they
• 56:44
  watched me. The perks of being in the
• 56:47
  bullpen, not 100% sure when you're gonna pitch.
• 56:49
  They they, they watched me like on the computer.
• 56:52
  My wife hates watching me pitch. She won't watch me.
• 56:56
  My mom will always watch me pitch.
• 56:58
  My wife will just at this point, after trying to watch me pitch,
• 57:02
  she just lets me give her the rundown, how it went after the
• 57:06
  fact. Or my mom will steal the beans
• 57:09
  beforehand and tell her how it's going or you know, whatever.
• 57:13
  So yeah, she don't like to watch me pitch, so I don't, I don't
• 57:16
  blame her. I had had some rocky outings
• 57:18
  when I first came back so it was tough for me to look back and
• 57:22
  watch, much less I could imagine for her.
• 57:24
  Now, in this time frame, what did pursuits look like because
• 57:27
  you thought you were done again, you have both daughters at this
• 57:31
  point, correct? Yes.
• 57:32
  Yeah. And they're in the fun years.
• 57:35
  From what I'm being told, Personalities are developing,
• 57:38
  and you can start to see who they are going to become.
• 57:41
  I'm assuming because they're young toddlers at that point
• 57:44
  they have a little spunk to them.
• 57:46
  Not just potatoes with arms and legs, but I want to know where
• 57:49
  your head was at. Like another dadhood check in at
• 57:53
  this point. Yeah, I, man, I'm a little more
• 57:56
  sentimental probably than most. And every time I would leave, I
• 58:00
  would get so sad. I remember I when I'd leave them
• 58:03
  and I knew I wasn't going to see them for an extended period of
• 58:07
  time. Like even though they visited me
• 58:09
  when I was in spring training, like they stayed down Airbnb for
• 58:13
  a week or whatever. And then when I ended up going
• 58:16
  to Elsinore, like, it worked out perfectly where I got to see
• 58:19
  them, like, throughout the year. But yeah, leaving them would
• 58:22
  just break my heart every single time.
• 58:25
  A few days pass, and then you start to grab yourself by the
• 58:28
  bootstraps and you're like, all right, like, we're going to get
• 58:31
  this done. And we've gotten a little bit
• 58:32
  more used to it because I'll leave.
• 58:34
  But they know that Dad's never gone for that long.
• 58:37
  And it's funny the way that it's kind of worked out even these
• 58:40
  past few years, like with Mexico City, like I signed after spring
• 58:45
  training into the season. I signed late because I told
• 58:49
  teams it's like, hey, I can't afford to go to spring training
• 58:53
  in Mexico because you don't make money.
• 58:55
  And it's like I got to make money.
• 58:57
  So it was like one of those things where my hands are tied.
• 59:00
  I had to turn down offers and invites to spring training,
• 59:03
  ended up signing late with Mexico City and then got sick
• 59:06
  and then came home for All Star Break.
• 59:08
  And then I didn't have a team after getting sick and losing my
• 59:11
  roster spot. And then for got to be home for
• 59:15
  almost 2 weeks and then signed with the conspirators.
• 59:19
  And then the second-half of the season super short.
• 59:22
  We didn't make playoffs. So I came home and wasn't gone
• 59:25
  for too long. Again, I've been fortunate
• 59:28
  enough to where we haven't gone like that.
• 59:30
  I didn't 24 I didn't go with. I went without seeing them for
• 59:36
  quite a few months, but this past year I was able to see them
• 59:39
  a little bit more which was nice.
• 59:40
  In 24, that was when you were kind of indie ball team to indie
• 59:44
  ball team, right? The American Association.
• 59:46
  Was that also your US PBL stint? Yes.
• 59:50
  Yeah, that's a crazy 1. You had to probably be the
• 59:53
  oldest player in the history of that league.
• 59:55
  I think I was, I, I was talking to a guy that's there this year
• 1:00:00
  and they get like former big leaguers all the time.
• 1:00:03
  Like they'll get like a, like there's a former big leaguer
• 1:00:06
  that they just signed and brought in just now.
• 1:00:08
  They always have like one or two like older projects just looking
• 1:00:13
  for a place. But last year was an interesting
• 1:00:16
  year because I was like, you know what?
• 1:00:18
  I don't care, like I'm just going to get innings under my
• 1:00:21
  belt. Also, I wanted to transition to
• 1:00:24
  a starter so I didn't do it the smoothest way.
• 1:00:28
  I did it mid season so I was A1 inning bullpen guy.
• 1:00:33
  I signed late again in the Frontier League because they
• 1:00:36
  were the first team to reach out to me.
• 1:00:40
  It was actually Bobby Jenks, who unfortunately just passed away,
• 1:00:45
  but he was my manager for that short stint and he was like hey,
• 1:00:50
  all off your spot right now. He loved the story.
• 1:00:53
  He's like, dude, you're throwing noise, like come on.
• 1:00:56
  So there I was, 1 inning guy and I got to the point I was just
• 1:01:00
  like, dude, I don't really like the bullpen.
• 1:01:02
  I just got to the point I was like, I want to start.
• 1:01:05
  And I remember telling him that there was one thing that was
• 1:01:08
  solid on the team. It was starting staff.
• 1:01:09
  And I was like, I don't want to mess with that.
• 1:01:11
  I'll look for another opportunity.
• 1:01:13
  Ended up going to a different team.
• 1:01:15
  They're like, hey, can you start on on on Sunday or Saturday or
• 1:01:20
  whatever it was and it was like 3 days from then.
• 1:01:22
  I was like, yeah, let's go for it.
• 1:01:24
  I'm not built up at all. I was like first inning, the
• 1:01:26
  lights out. I was like, dude, all right,
• 1:01:29
  let's go. Next inning.
• 1:01:30
  Hadn't done it up down, I don't know how long.
• 1:01:33
  Like already getting gassed in the 2nd.
• 1:01:35
  And even with me trying to pace myself, I remember like a hot
• 1:01:38
  game. First thing to go is command
• 1:01:42
  ended up like getting tired, block the house.
• 1:01:45
  I was like, Dang, it is going to be harder than I thought.
• 1:01:47
  So it was definitely a probably not the smartest way to do it.
• 1:01:51
  But at the same time, I don't regret it because I mean, now if
• 1:01:54
  you look at those stats, you go, oh, that was a rocky, rocky
• 1:01:57
  season, but I got the experience I needed.
• 1:02:00
  That was my number one goal. It's like, dude, I don't I don't
• 1:02:03
  care about any of that right now.
• 1:02:04
  I just want to get innings under my belt and I want to develop
• 1:02:08
  into a starter. And my goal was to get ready for
• 1:02:11
  winter ball because I had a winter ball opportunity in
• 1:02:14
  Puerto Rico as a starting pitcher.
• 1:02:16
  And that's kind of what transitioned for me to just get
• 1:02:19
  those kind of like non pressure innings in in the US PBL, which
• 1:02:24
  I loved by the way. It's kind of that hybrid in
• 1:02:27
  between facility training and just going to Indy ball because
• 1:02:32
  Indy ball is ruthless. You have a bad outing.
• 1:02:34
  It's like, hey, we got to get rid of you.
• 1:02:36
  And whereas like there, it's like you can get your innings
• 1:02:39
  in. They're very development
• 1:02:40
  conscious. I got innings in there and I saw
• 1:02:43
  a lot of progress. I figured a lot of things out
• 1:02:46
  and then I when I played winter ball and then that's where
• 1:02:49
  things slowly kind of started to figure themselves out.
• 1:02:52
  But yeah, it was it was an interesting.
• 1:02:55
  You look back at that that year, I think I was on three indie
• 1:02:59
  ball teams. It was I signed, then I asked
• 1:03:04
  for my release so I could be a starter and then I got traded
• 1:03:08
  and then I went to the USPBL to get innings in before winter
• 1:03:11
  ball and then I went and played winter ball.
• 1:03:14
  I was all over the place. So 5 total teams in 2024?
• 1:03:18
  Yeah, that was. That's crazy.
• 1:03:20
  Most people would say 5 teams is a career and you did it in one
• 1:03:23
  season. Yeah, it's like one of the perks
• 1:03:26
  of like having good stuff to get your foot in the door.
• 1:03:30
  It doesn't really mean much of anything, but like it creates
• 1:03:33
  intrigue. And that's one thing that I
• 1:03:36
  definitely had was the stuff I was like in the Frontier as A1
• 1:03:41
  inning guy. I think my average heater was 97
• 1:03:44
  plus and I was popping out like 101.
• 1:03:47
  And they're like this guy wants to try to start like, all right,
• 1:03:50
  like we'll see what it like. What does this look like as a
• 1:03:52
  starter? And so it created opportunities
• 1:03:55
  for me. But the the opportunities
• 1:03:58
  without performance and leagues like that only get you so far.
• 1:04:02
  So it's like you got to start producing at some point, which I
• 1:04:06
  finally feel like now I'm getting to the point where the
• 1:04:10
  performance and the stuff are starting to come together.
• 1:04:13
  I've I've relearned how to be a pitcher.
• 1:04:15
  Before I quit baseball and I was young, I was the greatest at
• 1:04:19
  pitching. But I'm finally starting to
• 1:04:22
  figure that out. Put it all together I guess.
• 1:04:25
  Figuring out that whole pitching thing at 34 years old, no time
• 1:04:28
  like the present. And with that, it brings us kind
• 1:04:31
  of full circle to where we started, what we covered
• 1:04:34
  initially with the first year we we finally have gotten there.
• 1:04:37
  I guess that's what happens when you try to cover what is that 16
• 1:04:41
  years to to a story, but we somehow did it to get you into
• 1:04:46
  2025. What are you looking forward to
• 1:04:50
  now, both with baseball and with where you're at in this stage of
• 1:04:55
  life as a father and a husband? Yeah.
• 1:04:57
  So in a in a perfect world, what I'm with the goal is, is to get
• 1:05:04
  a opportunity to play in a league where I can do well to
• 1:05:09
  financially support my family and then also have them
• 1:05:13
  alongside with me, whether that be in the States or overseas and
• 1:05:19
  in Asia, preferably Japan. Japan would be like making the
• 1:05:23
  big leagues for me in my opinion.
• 1:05:25
  I had interest before I had my foot injury this year in Taiwan,
• 1:05:32
  which was part of the reason I was pushing to get back so
• 1:05:35
  quickly. That on top of I really wanted
• 1:05:37
  my team to make playoffs in Mexico and we were close.
• 1:05:40
  But yeah, I think working my way over to SEAS, financially
• 1:05:44
  supporting the family and then being able to have them
• 1:05:47
  alongside me as much as I can, whether that be in a a spot
• 1:05:51
  overseas where it's like, hey, we spend a year or two or
• 1:05:55
  however many in Japan or wherever Taiwan, Korea or the
• 1:06:01
  States are like, hey, we don't care about your age because you
• 1:06:05
  pitched so well here overseas that we'll we'll sign you and,
• 1:06:09
  you know, give you a shot to break with big league camp like
• 1:06:12
  that. That would be like the dream.
• 1:06:14
  But yeah, I think that's kind of what I'm hoping for next year.
• 1:06:18
  It's nice because I feels like I have a team that wants me back
• 1:06:22
  for the first time in quite a while because I proved to them
• 1:06:25
  this guy's can be a really good commodity to our team.
• 1:06:29
  I had a couple of good, really good outings in a stint before I
• 1:06:32
  heard my foot with my last team, especially as a starter.
• 1:06:35
  So I think having that opportunity next year with them
• 1:06:39
  and then also a desire to, you know, states overseas, there's
• 1:06:44
  so many outlets now, even though the roster is downsized in the
• 1:06:47
  States, like playing internationally to me is like
• 1:06:50
  really open doors, I guess. And it's exciting because
• 1:06:54
  there's a lot of really good opportunities.
• 1:06:56
  And probably create some incredible moments having the
• 1:06:59
  family along the way, which I don't want to skip over that
• 1:07:02
  point. I, I do think that's awesome
• 1:07:05
  that you are trying to figure out ways for them to be a part
• 1:07:09
  of your journey. So maybe, maybe we'll spend a
• 1:07:12
  little bit of time on that concept.
• 1:07:15
  How how important is it for you to share your experiences with
• 1:07:21
  them or have the family share, share everything together?
• 1:07:26
  You obviously haven't had too much of that opportunity to
• 1:07:29
  date, but it sounds like that's something that you're really
• 1:07:33
  working towards. Yeah, for sure.
• 1:07:35
  When I'm putting things into perspective, like I remember
• 1:07:38
  like the primary reason I'm doing it and I have these goals
• 1:07:41
  is so like it's a duty. One of your duties as a father
• 1:07:45
  and a husband is to financially support your family.
• 1:07:48
  And if I can do this and you know, provide them a good life
• 1:07:51
  while still being able to like selfishly and unselfishly.
• 1:07:55
  Like it's important for a husband to be around as well as
• 1:07:58
  a father, obviously in their kids life, but I want to be
• 1:08:02
  around them as much as I can. So if I can financially support
• 1:08:05
  and then just be around, then my goal is just to be able to be
• 1:08:08
  around them as much as I can. Those are the 2 two most most
• 1:08:11
  important things with my career. And it helps keep in perspective
• 1:08:14
  of like this baseball thing because selfishly, you can get
• 1:08:17
  caught up in like wanting to be that picture that you know
• 1:08:20
  you're capable of and you feel like you're so close.
• 1:08:23
  You had these opportunities. And it helps prevent falling
• 1:08:26
  into a selfish mindset and being like, hey, like the whole reason
• 1:08:29
  I'm doing this first and foremost is to give a good life
• 1:08:32
  for my family. And if I can do that through the
• 1:08:35
  means of something that I've dreamt about my whole life, then
• 1:08:38
  that's awesome. Part of The thing is though,
• 1:08:41
  it's like this could be an opportunity to provide for my
• 1:08:45
  family in a way. Like I don't have any
• 1:08:48
  opportunities elsewhere because baseball can be a very lucrative
• 1:08:52
  career. Like if you make it to really
• 1:08:54
  high levels and then be able to spend a lot of time with your
• 1:08:58
  family as well as if you're able to accomplish and get to a
• 1:09:01
  certain level. So that would be the ideal goal.
• 1:09:04
  But if if not, I think the experience throughout the way
• 1:09:09
  still opens a lot of doors and it's helped me meet a lot of
• 1:09:13
  people in terms of like the next career I want to go down, which
• 1:09:16
  is, you know, coaching. So the experience regardless is,
• 1:09:20
  is beneficial. So where wherever it takes me,
• 1:09:23
  like I'm grateful. And I think it's been super
• 1:09:26
  meaningful the the experience. And I don't think that you can
• 1:09:31
  replace all of these experiences that I've had in terms of being
• 1:09:36
  a coach. It just helps me add things that
• 1:09:39
  I can pull from in the future. Like you're looking to play in
• 1:09:42
  Mexico. Yeah, I played in Mexico.
• 1:09:44
  Oh, you're you're pursuing something overseas.
• 1:09:46
  I've been there. Winter ball, you know, states.
• 1:09:49
  It's like, oh, you took time off from your playing.
• 1:09:51
  You had the yips. You had tea, but it's like
• 1:09:53
  whatever. It's like I could draw
• 1:09:55
  experiences and help other people maybe going through the
• 1:09:58
  same thing. Beautiful, Matt, that that
• 1:10:01
  really does it for me. I don't know if there's anything
• 1:10:03
  else you feel like you really want to get off your chest at
• 1:10:06
  this point. We we've obviously gone through
• 1:10:09
  a lot, but I know there's so much to the story.
• 1:10:12
  Yeah. No, nothing else to get off my
• 1:10:14
  chest, just it was really good to be able to talk to you.
• 1:10:17
  When I was going into this, it was like, I get to do a FaceTime
• 1:10:21
  and a phone call with a friend of mine that I haven't seen in a
• 1:10:24
  while. And the fact that you're going
• 1:10:26
  to have a new family coming, I hope that, you know, I know we
• 1:10:29
  spent a lot of time talking about myself, which my wife says
• 1:10:33
  I love doing. Well, I asked you too, so you
• 1:10:37
  you have a. Pass this time, yeah.
• 1:10:40
  But yeah, I hope, I hope I gave you you something, if anything.
• 1:10:44
  And and I hope that you feel comfortable enough to reach out
• 1:10:48
  if you do have any more questions about that.
• 1:10:51
  And I just want to congratulate you on that and hopefully I'll
• 1:10:55
  be praying for you, you and the family for health and everything
• 1:10:59
  goes smooth. And I'm looking forward to
• 1:11:01
  hearing more about your journey as well.
• 1:11:03
  Thank you so much man. I really appreciate that.
• 1:11:06
  And I know you are passionate about helping others, so maybe
• 1:11:09
  I'll ask one more thing of you. Are there ways that people can
• 1:11:13
  get in touch with you if they want to learn more, hear more
• 1:11:16
  about your story, or just follow along?
• 1:11:19
  Yeah, I mean, I try to be pretty active on social media.
• 1:11:23
  It's a good way to network as well, you know, get in touch
• 1:11:26
  with a lot of people in the baseball world.
• 1:11:29
  I got the the squilly pitching you could follow on Instagram.
• 1:11:33
  Yeah, there aren't too many swillies out there.
• 1:11:36
  So if you Google me or you look me up on social media, I'll
• 1:11:39
  probably easy to find. I don't even remember my handle
• 1:11:42
  name on like on X, the platform formerly known as Twitter.
• 1:11:46
  But yeah, probably social media. I try to be as active as I can.
• 1:11:50
  And then I got people reaching out and DM ING me all the time,
• 1:11:53
  and I try to be as open and connect with as many people that
• 1:11:58
  way as I can. So yeah, you just reach out to
• 1:12:01
  me that way. Perfect man, Thank you.
• 1:12:03
  Thank you for opening up today. Thank you for sharing your
• 1:12:06
  journey. This has been a great
• 1:12:08
  conversation and I'm excited to see what's to come.
• 1:12:12
  And hopefully everybody else can follow along on Twitter as we
• 1:12:15
  hope to get you signed somewhere soon.
• 1:12:18
  Sounds good my friend. Yes.
• 1:12:20
  Well, to everyone out there, thanks for laying back with us.