Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #141 WE HAVE BIG NEWS

Transcript

#141 WE HAVE BIG NEWS · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You've just done something.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: I've done something which I was going to bring this
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: up in private, but then I thought we are running late,
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: need to record this episode.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: Of course, what better time than now. There's no better time.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: You've pissed on the floor.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: I didn't. You did? I definitely did not.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Yes, you're a floor piss up.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: I did not. I have great control.
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: You went to the toilet. How do you know?
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: I don't sit.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know how you do it, but you've managed
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: to get w wiz on the floor.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: I didn't.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: I stand by one of us, producer Jess, went to
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: the bathroom, came out and said him over there has
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: pissed on the floor.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Dare I did not. I did not. I see what
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: I WII.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Must have had a boner or something.
• 0:42
  Speaker 4: I don't know what you're doing in that guilty Welcome.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: Back to two my own webs.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to do the intro.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Bro. Sorry, you're not doing this, so I didn't.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: They Welcome back to two Doting Dads. I am Addie
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: Jay and this is a podcast all about parenting. It
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: is the good, it is the bad, and the relatable.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: And we don't give advice ever at all.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Except don't piss on the floor in Maddy's house because
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: you'll find out.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: It's just I feel like most people would have a
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: decent amount of respect to not piss on someone else's property.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Got to get back at you somehow. I don't want to.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: I honestly didn't know I did that. That's right.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: We are on holidays as a family. We've gone down
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: to the house and the house was looking great. You know, Tom,
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I builder, who is just amazing. Kids, there's little fingerprints
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: fucking everywhere, sticky, so sticky.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Bro, you give them something that's not even sticky, and
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: all of a sudden they've got fucking sticky. It's what
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: are they doing? I think, what are they doing? Science?
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, don't touch that, put that down, putting
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: their feet up on the wall, like feet and also
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: like coloring in. Just everything they do is just making
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: a mess. And I get it. They're young and they're
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: living their lives, living their best lives.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: If a child draws on a wall in your house,
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: what's the course of action in terms of discipline.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: I will beat them to a pulp.
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: I would expect nothing less.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: That is the fear that's been inflicted on them. I'm
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: yet to do it, Thank heavens for anyone wondering I did.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: Not my children, not yet. But there's a lot of
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: yelling right now. As far as the holidays go, it's
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: been it's been like a yellow minute.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: We offer talk about school holidays and how or just
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: holidays with your family in general, and it's like it's
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: meant to be like really fun, but it just ends
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: up being fucking nightmarees it's a nightmare.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: I mean Marley, she didn't realize she thought holidays, we're
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: just weekends. Like she didn't realize that.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Oh bless.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: I was like, you're on holidays, and she's like, sweet weekends.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: And then on Monday she was like, uh, school and
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: I was like, no, you're on holidays. She's never had
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: like she's always been a daycare, so she's never had holidays.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: Never had an Oscar thinks the word yesterday means anytime
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: any day that happened prior.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: I love that.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: So he'll be like, we'll go somewhere that we were
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: at like a year ago. He'd be like, we were
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: here yesterday. I was like, what are you talking about.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to live with this anxiety that you know,
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: obviously house is it going to get lived in? Right?
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: It's not museums, I know, but I just everything looks
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: nice that without kids in it.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: Off for sure, Like a brand new car and you
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: put a kid in it. Oh, they just ruin everything.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: It's like they're carrying a constant bag of rubbish with them.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh, come in the car, don't let me
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: just get my bag of rubbish.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: It's the worst. So I'm so glad. I agonized of
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: every nook and cranny of that house just to let
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: my kids destroy it.
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: The moment they moved in, they're like, is this eggshell white?
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: Not anymore?
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: And then I come back, booker white?
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: What's the come back here? And you're pissing on the
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: fucking toilet floor seat. Jesus, can't you know? Just everywhere
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: I turned, there's.
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: No concrete evidence that it was me.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: Producer Jazz has photos. She's untrustworthy. You're right, you're right,
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: just photo? Are you taking photos of my piss?
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: She just threw me a shaker.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: That means yes, I'm into it. That's cool, very good,
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: very good.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: I saw a guy on the drive down here by
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: the way up here. He was in the back of
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: the car and had his head out the window like
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: a dog on the highway, just like head out, like
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: mouth open. Maybe he ate something really spicy. I was like,
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: I've never seen that before.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: Maybe he's fueled by wind, very gassy, very it would
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: be so very good. Do you know what I saw?
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Speaking about something pit seat speaking about seeing things while driving.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: I don't know if I've ever told you is one
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: time I was driving out of my grandmother's house, who
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: lives in Western Sydney. And we know Western Sydney. No offense, chess,
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: it's pretty dicey, you know.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: No, Actually I love Western Sydney.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: Whoa heyjeuz I didn't say I didn't like that.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: I'd love to know what portion of our listener is
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: from Western Sydney. If you are listening and you do
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: reside in the West of Sydney, please let us know.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: Well, this might be you.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: If you're listening listening in the car.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: Perhaps I was at the lights on the way out
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: west I look over to someone in their car and
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: they were smoking an ice pipe. What suburb is this,
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: Gilford Classic Guildford. Yeah, So if you are listening, enjoy
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: that math then phetamine.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, meth and ice the same thing. Yeah, it is, Yep,
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: it is great, great spoke, much spoken, like a true addict.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: Anyway, I look over and he's blazing up. Just couldn't
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: wait to get home. I don't know, maybe he just
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: likes to live life on the edge, or maybe you're addicted.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: It's a certain like there's a line, isn't it when
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: you're a meth head, but you do it in private,
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: But when you're a meth head you do it in public.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: You're like you've crossed the line.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: That myth must have been moorish You getting back for seconds?
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: Okay, what do I go for? What do I go for? Hey?
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Speaking of substances? Good segue, seg, thank you. As you know,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: obviously goes to primary school much like Marley and primary
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: schools schools in general, they have a lot of outside
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: of school our activities, like he just went off the
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: top of my head, like pizza and puzzle night okay,
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: which is usually like Father's Day, right, and I know
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: that puzzle. Yeah, it's like it's like after hours, right,
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: so it's like four o'clock sounds sexual, pizza and penises, pizza,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: pizza and dad's penis. Yeah, Okay, let me get back
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: on track. Outside of school now, A lot of these
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: things are alcohol free zones, as you can imagine, because what.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: What no, just imagining you rocking up. Did Pizza and
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: Puzzle night with the case of beer?
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah? I thought it was pizza puzzle and case of
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: pizza puzzle.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: No?
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: No, no, very funny. I just know. Sorry, I know.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: You. You're like you sound like annoyed and surprised.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: I tried to take my meth pipe with me again.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: You know they're but they also do events that are
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: like parents only, like for fundraiser. I'm not going to
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: get through these fucking hell.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: Only ones.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: Let me come to those on three keys and anyway,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: so the adults only nine yeah, ah, fucking hell.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: God.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Anyway, we went to what they call a mingle. This
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: story sounds terrible. This sounds like a horrible Sorry what
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: hap is it only mingles?
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: No?
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: This was this was the kids. This was a there
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: were kids. There were kids on this mingles.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: Actually bring one kid.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: Anyway, All these events are alcohol free, and it begs
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: the question why, Okay, outside of school hours, this parent
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: mingle was for I can't get I can't look at you,
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: I look at the floor. Look at the floor. I
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: questioned why there's no alcohol? And I found out that
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: there used to be alcohol at these after school events
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: like the fundraising shit, the parents' nights or whatever there
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: used to be until trivia night last year. Apparently all
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: the parents got really lit and they ended up finding
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: alcohol like bottles around the school.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: What is wrong with people?
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: I think it's really funny.
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: What's wrong with people? Come on, this is just for the kids.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: Well they ruined it for all of us. Anyway, we
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: went to the mingle. How drunk were they getting? Apparently
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: they were lit like list. It was a fundraising trivia
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: end of years.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: And you talk about Western Sydney being bad, the northern
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: beaches of Sydney a bunch of.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: His heads, Yeah yeah, but nothing else to do sink
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: piers at schools, at the school mingles, at the school mingle.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: So we went to the Kindi Mingle, which was not
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: run by the school all right, it's run by some
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: volunteers and whatever. And it was like the P and
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: C whatever it might be.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: And I was like, it would be Friday, whatever it
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: may be. It's the Peens, it's a Friday afternoon.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: It's the P and C. Okay. The event was, Ah,
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: why are you going to.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: Argue me on the pens?
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I don't care about the p and C. I've never
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: heard of them. Well, the school has a p and C.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: The P and C organized a KINDI parent mingle, so
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: you meet the other parents because obviously now we've been
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: grouped into classes and now I'm forced to be friends
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: with people that don't want to be friends with. Also,
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: all the parents out there that go to my kids school,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: I love you. I have some friends that we all
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: their kids go to this, to the same school, and
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: I thought, I don't want to go to an alcohol
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: for event on a Friday, so I took a six pack.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: But the difference is with the six pack is I
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: wrapped all the beers in and in a nappy like
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: a cool No.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: Don't you just look like a fucking weird like a
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: weirdo sniffing nappies.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: I don't sniff my beers, bro, I chuggle them.
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: Are you hiding a beer in a nappy?
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: Like that looks weird. Like you're better off just going
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: to the toilet.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: That's way creepy because the people think I'm doing some
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: illicit drugs in there.
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: Don't look any better walking around with like four nappies
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: in your hand.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: A nappy guy, how do you assume I only had four?
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: No one would be able to suspect it.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: What do we got?
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: That is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen. Well,
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: the jokes on you because I got away with it.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: When we were in the cool corner, people were coming
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: over again, what's going on over here? I'm like, nappy
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: beer can?
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: I make a suggestion. You're better off getting a coke
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: can and getting a tolley and pouring a tolly into
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: the coke can.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: Too much work. You just look weird that you're holding
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: a dirty nappy.
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: That's funny. That's part of the joke. But like, don't
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: question me.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: It works. Sorry, it worked up until we were leaving
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: and I had to empty the bag full of beer
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: cans into the recycling being which is full of Like, so,
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: what do you do drink can? What do you do
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: with the nappies? Oh, they're in there too. I'm taking
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: a stand.
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: April is a lucky lady.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: If they're going to force me to be friends with people,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: then I'm going to be drinking. Are your events not
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: alcohol free or do you go to them.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: We haven't been to I don't know. Wow, we haven't
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: had any. Actually we had one wrap up party, not
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: wrap up party, rap up. We had one like welcome
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: party for the kindie okay, after hours on a Friday,
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: and it was kids too. Kids went. I was down
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: the coast so I wasn't there. Do you know if
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: it was our colfer it I don't know. I will
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: ask for you.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: I think if you do it look as a school okay,
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: I get it inside school hours. No, not rocking up
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: to a midday assembly, and least anyone someone would be
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: if you have. But like I think, if you're okay, hey,
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Friday afternoon, after school hours, you should have a tipple.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: You should be allowed to have a tipple. I'm not
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: saying get like hammered. I had like eight beers, but
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: that's not the point. That's I can. I can handle it.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: And then a bit of math. But I think if
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: you have to say you're joking, because people might oh shit,
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: yeah sorry, might not know that you're not being I'm
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: not a math head yet. Yeah, but I think that
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: they should be. You should be able to have a tipple.
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree with that.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: Okay, but well done.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: Well done for your ingenuity.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: I thought that was groundbreaking.
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: You are.
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: You're a very magiv. I'm the magiver of beer drinking.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, next time I'll come up with something a
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: little bit more.
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: I'll just strap it to a child. I'll be like,
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: let me have a sip. Hey, you did something before
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: I pisced on the floor.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: I get it.
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: No, not that one. You found something that you shouldn't have.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: It's a photo of ultrasound because we're having a baby. Whoa, But.
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: I kind of already knew who.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: I just tell how I tried to pour your lovely wife, Laura. Congratulations.
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: By the way, I'm holding loto of a young fetus.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: A beautiful Johnson fetus.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Is it a boy or a girl? We don't know.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: I didn't shock right now.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: I know I tried to pour Laura a drink when
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: we when you return from the jungle, and that drink
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: was denied, and I had a suspicion. I had suspicions.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: I also haven't seen Laura in a while. Also, yeah,
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: that's probably about it. And I know there's been talk
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: about it, and I just knew. Also, someone might have
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: spilled the beans who tell who. I'm not telling me
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: I know, because I will get in trouble. Just tell
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: me I forced it out of someone. Who give me
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: some ellie? Yeah?
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: Did you have her against the wall? Literally that war?
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: I have her against that wall right there?
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: Because I said to Laura, I was like, hey, I
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: brought some margaritas the can and it's look one can,
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: it's like two and a half standard drinks. Like I'm
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: trying to get lit here yet. And I was like,
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: do you want to go halves? And she was like yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: very tentative and I was and I looked over your
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: mum and she was like.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: I was like, okay, she's signaling.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: Like don't do that. She's so. Because she was so,
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I was like, do you know what I did? After that?
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: I looked at her and I was like, come here,
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: and she was like she knew a white straightaway that
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: I was going to crack this safe immediately.
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: And I was like, you better tell me right what's gone?
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: What did she say? She's a terrible liar? And she
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: was like, no, I can't. I can't tell me. That's
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: exactly what she sounds like. I could never I could
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: never tell you. And I was like, what are we
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: going to do. Is I'm going to ask you a question,
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: You're going to nod your head. And I was like,
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: is Laura pregnant?
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: And she was like yeah. I was wondering where she
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: got those bruises from. Sorry about that.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: And then I was like, I was like, fucking okay,
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: all right, I know it and I know it now.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: And she was like, oh, don't tell them. I told
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: you they beat me, so congratulations. Already knew, but congratulations,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: this is going to ruin us financially. So we got
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: give me a look at this baby. When are we okay?
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: Hang on November? No, sooner October October? Baby, I was close.
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: It's late October there, right, No, what it's.
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: In mid We were trying before I went into the jungle.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: Just in case you didn't come back.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: The plan was we said this year twenty twenty five,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: if we are going to have a third, this will
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: be the year that it happens. Because I'm conscious that
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: Marley and Lola really close together. They're about eighteen months
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: Nowlas just turned four, and I was like, if it
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: doesn't happen this year, you know, it's a big gap.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: It's a big gap.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: Also it's like accidental gap. You know. We were like, oh,
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: it must have been an accident. It's like it's a
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: bit of double edged sword.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: And that great because Marley, I guess, the older she comes,
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: the older she turns, the more capable she is as
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: a second third parent the main parent, which is great.
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: But then we're like, we don't want you with that
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: third child to still be friends with Marley and Lola.
• 17:28
  Speaker 3: And the third child always gets forgotten about it.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: Like they do, don't they You're the thing, Oh yeah,
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: like you know exactly how how I turned out. But
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: we said we're going to try, and we're kind of
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: even said, we're like, if it doesn't happen before the jungle,
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: like by the time I come back, it's going to
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: be February, you know. And they're like, you know, for
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: those who don't know, it takes nine months for a
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: baby to grow in a woman's body. Then we're like, oh,
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: that's pushing in the two thousand and twenty six.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we're kind of like, I have a summer baby,
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: like immediate, like you know, no October. It's still it's close.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: But so and I said to Laura, if I make
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: it to the end of the jungle, and I was like,
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: fucking tell me, like if if you get if you'll
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: find out you're pregnant whilst I'm away when you come
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: on the show, like tell me, right. So then obviously
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: she didn't tell me, and then I kind of didn't.
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: It wasn't like front of mine. But we came back
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: from the jungle and I was like, oh, I guess
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: you're not pregnant, and she was like nah, I was
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: thinking about it and probably like not the wisest thing
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: for us to do, right We're in a really good
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: position right now. And I was like, yeah, do you
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: know what you know? I was like, you're probably right,
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: Like what were we thinking trying to have a third mass?
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: Pretty crazy? And then and then there's a video. I'm
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: assuming by the time this comes out, this video will
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: be posted. But Laura then she goes, oh, someone gave
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: me a scratchy and you scratch it. And I was like, oh,
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: a little scratch scratchy. Sure, So I'm scratching it. And
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: it was a really bad quality scratchy, like it was
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: at a coin And as I was scratching off the
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: top layer, it would then take that first layer off
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: and then when you went to reveal like what's printed underneath,
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: it was taking the print off.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: As well, and I was like, this is.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: I was like, and I was It was one of
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: those hard ones where I was trying to figure it out,
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: like it was like match four of these icons, and
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: if you get two of this one, it means you
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: get that one on the first right, which underneath that
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: one there.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Is that how you get pregnant. Do the scratchy.
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: So I'm scratching and I'm like, this is shit, throw
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: it out and then she's like, keep on scratching, and
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: then you scratch it. It was like fifteen icons and
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: then then like a little tiny bottom right one it
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: said you're having a baby, and I was like.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Where's the money?
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: And then I was like I was very confused, and
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: also I was in the mindset of like do we
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: want to have a third Yeah?
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: You were like talking yourself out of it. We were
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: straddling both sides of the party. Nice I was now
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: I've got visuals.
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: One hand. We were like, it'll be amazing to have
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: three kids. You know, I grew up was one of five.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: Imagine when we're older having a house full of three children.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: And their partner's beautiful. But then on the other hand,
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: I'm like, we're kind of like out of the trenches now.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you like you're talking now. I don't want to
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: sound you're talking now. Back to bassin there, back.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: To we don't we don't use nappies in the house anymore,
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: We don't use the pram anymore.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my pram is covered in cobwebs. I looked at
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: it the other day and it was looking back at me.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Like shut up, yeah where now. I spoke to someone
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: who has a newborn, and I was like, what's that like? Suck?
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: It's I've forgotten. I've forgotten all those years of what
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: it's what it's.
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: Like having a third kid. I knew you would. I
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: knew it was going to happen. I just did. I
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: thought maybe next year.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: I also when when I found out in that moment
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: when we had the scratchyet, I think we were at
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: what we were maybe like twelve weeks, eleven weeks, so
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: we have it. We didn't even have like the big tests.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: So then I also was conscious of like, you know,
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: I don't want to it's very early days. I don't
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: want to celebrate it and be like, we're having a
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: kid because we've our cycle. When I say hours, Laura's
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: we've had first child was a miscarriage. Then Laura was
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: pregnant with Marley. Then after Milly was born, she got
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: pregnant again. We lost that child at around twelve weeks shit,
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: and then we had Lala. So you know, I'm kind
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: of looking at the roadmap of which we just come
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: down and I'm like, well, we're kind of due for
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: another miscarriage.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: So how many weeks are we now? So we are
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: currently because I'm equally as involved.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: In this together, Laura is currently I've lost count. She's
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: fourteen or fifteen weeks.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: So yeah, So we went and had we went and had
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: the few tests done, but there's a lot of I
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: thought there was just one test at twelve weeks.
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: I think just opt in for a few different there's.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: A few different ones, and I was kind of waiting
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: for the bad news, like for something to go wrong.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: And I was like excited at the moment, but then
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: I was like, you know, until where I don't know,
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: I guess.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: Like you're holding the baby in your hand, Yeah, exactly exactly.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: So then I was every test, I was kind of
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: waiting and they're you know, taking all the measurements and
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: like the heartbeat and everything else, just waiting for something
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: to go wrong.
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: It was very weird.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: I don't know if you recall ash when you go
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: in excuse my ignorance here ultrasound.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: Oh I got sea sick.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: That's right, you passed out. But there was a student
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: doctor who was in the room. He was very good looking,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: very good looking, and like the ultrasound. It's not that invasive,
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: you know, if anyone's well, but you have one where
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: they like, you know, you pull your pants down quite
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: a bit and your belly is exposed and they scan it.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Then they have the one that's like a big old
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: banana size like instrument, and I was in the chair
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: in the corner and it felt like is it called
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: the cock chair?
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you were cocked. My guy, A good looking doctor
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: inserted something into your wife.
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: They're good looking doctor did the optra sound over the belly,
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: and then they were like, we'll be back in one second.
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: And then Laura was like, I wonder if he's going
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: to do like the next part, which is like the
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: banana rocket. And I was like, hope, So I'm joking popcorn.
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I was let me get the tissues out, beautiful.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: He didn't come back. He didn't come back.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: We had the lovely older doctor female do that part.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: Laura was like, thank god it wasn't him. He was gorgeous,
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: gorgeous young doctor.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: Anyway here, So.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: We're still where we're fifteen weeks. We've had all, like
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: all the major tests done. Everything's looking good and everything's
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: tracking nicely.
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: And with the gender, you're not going to tell anyone
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: of this.
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: The big question was big question was Marley and Lola.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: We found out at birth the sex, and I was like,
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: this is great, like it's lovely. But first child, I
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: was happy with whatever. Second child, I thought everyone else
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: thought that Lola was going to be a boy, so
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: I just had it in my mind that it was
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: going to be a boy. So there was just a
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: split second. But like gender surprise where you're like, oh,
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: I wasn't expecting that. It's like you're thinking you're going
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: to get a chocolate cake and you got a sponge.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: A sponge is still great. I'll eat a sponge, no
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: questions asked. But at the same time, I just was
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: expecting a chocolate cake and mudcake do you know what
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: I'm saying. You're picking up what I'm putting down. I am,
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: and now I'm just hungry. And so I just said
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: to Laura, like, I want to go into birth because
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: it's all about me. I'd like to know. And I
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: think childbirth is beautiful enough of the moment that you
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: don't need it to be at another like added level
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: of surprise. But Laura was like, how amazing. You don't
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: get many surprises in life for what reason?
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: Like we did what's the yeah, yeah, yeah, what's the right?
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: And I was like, well, let's let's pad this out.
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: We can have a surprise now and then childbirth is
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: still great. It's not like you're not going to enjoy
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: childbirth because you know the sex of your child. You're
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: still going to enjoy it.
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: It's going to be the sexy child is going to
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: be the sexuy childs for the rest of his life.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So well, so I was like, let's find out
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: prior so a bit of debating, I won nice because
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: you know this is we are not going for a
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: fourth Yeah, I think we're you know, Laura's forty, she's
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: thirty nine, she's young and fertile, she's not, well, she's
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: a geriatric.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: She's not.
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: She's medically it's just thirty nine medically, Yeah, yeah, old
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: of those medically medical medically is like we're saying she's
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: geriatric in afford it.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: It's like imob technically called to the B and I
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: scale how old are these thinks? They're not wrong, that's mean,
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: but geriatric at forty? What for pregnancy?
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: Forgan?
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: I was going to say, when was this scientific record
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: kept from the forties. It's just when it comes to pregnancy,
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: it's very offensive. That is offensive. I'm offended for her.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: And she's thirty nine?
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: Is she she's thirty nine? Yeah, which is almost forty. Sorry,
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: what is the new thirty?
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: Anyway? Congratulations, that's amazing, Thank you very much. Like I said,
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: I knew it was coming. I didn't know it was
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: coming this early. And I also was waiting for you
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: to tell me because I knew. And also I found
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: that over there and I walked in and I said,
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: do you have something to tell me? And you gave
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: me this look like like no, and I was like,
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: oh no, embracing for the worst.
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: So I'm I'm glad. It's the best, the best result.
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: Thank you very much, and so I didn't tell you sooner.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: No that I wanted to surprise you on the pot,
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: but fucking that was harder than I thought. Because you
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: are a detective I am.
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: Do you know I lived next door to a good
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: friend of mine a while ago across the hall, and
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: I also picked twice when she was pregnant without them
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: before they told us i'd have a gift.
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: Jess is not pregnant gift. That's a gift.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: Point someone out.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: This might sound weird, but I don't have a kink
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: with pregnant women.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you don't.
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: But I find Laura at the moment, she's popping a
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: lot more than the previous pregnancies.
• 27:30
  Speaker 3: Wait normally works. She also doesn't answer my calls.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: She's been avoiding your bellies popped like I think with Marley,
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: she didn't pop right until the final trimester. Whereas now
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: that belly's out and Laura's like, oh, I just feel
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: so fat. I hate it, And I'm like, damn girl,
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: I'm like, ohoh, ring that belly, I love it.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Get the vitamin E cream out and rather it's just like,
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: because you know it helps.
• 27:58
  Speaker 5: The trench marks right, get in there, man, deep in there,
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: you know, like all over, just the belly, just a belly.
• 28:07
  Speaker 5: Feet work on the feet. Nah, that Laura has dry feet.
• 28:17
  Speaker 5: I'm not a foot guy.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: If I'm honest. The hands of the legs.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, I'm gonna I look forward to lubing Laura
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: luber ride with a vitamin E cream or some baby oil,
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: slipping slider.
• 28:33
  Speaker 3: I find a horse, what what do you mean?
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: Gymnastics and there's that thing they get get all handsy
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: and they they fling their legs around. That's a I'm
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: going to ride Laura like a pommel horse.
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: You're ready, She's going to be the apparatus.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: I hope she's ready. She would be ready.
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: There is no other moment when I find Laura more
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: attractive than when she's pregnant.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: You've got to kink my guy. I mean, get my
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: list of pregnant women up here. I've got a folder.
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: I just I don't know, it's beautiful. Keep my hands
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: off that.
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: I can't wait for my for you page to just
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: be pregnant.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we're also, I haven't celebrated it. Really. I have
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: moments where I'm like, oh, wow, you know, what's it
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: gonna try to envision having a newborn baby in the house,
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: and I'm trying to imagine it. But at the same time,
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: every time I start to imagine it, I put the
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: handbreak up because I'm like, I know, I don't wanna.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: Is it because of you put your handbreak up because
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: you don't want to celebrate in case something happened? Is
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: that what I'm picking up?
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because we've been down that road a number of times,
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: and especially like the the first time Laura was pregnant,
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: which is obviously each pregnancy is special, but the very
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: first time, Like, there is no greater change in your
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: life as an adult from when you go from no
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: kids to having kids, and so that first one is
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: the biggest moment of all, I think, And that first
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: one is you know, you, that's when I don't know
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: what you were like, but I was, you know, I
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: was spending every second imagining like, oh my god, what
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: is it going to be like being a parent, Like
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: this is actually going to happen. And then when that's
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: taken away from you, you know, there's no greater emotional
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: whiplash than having a miscarriage.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I haven't, thankfully, I haven't had to experience that,
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: but also I think like what we do on this
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: pot is we do practice, We do preach a little
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: bit is like don't don't go through all that stuff alone,
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: like don't feel that you can't celebrate your wins.
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think I think as as we get closer,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: because in my mind, we're still like at the beginning
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: of the of the pregnancy and even like when Laura
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: was pregnant with Mali and pregnant with Lola, there was
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: there was lots of times throughout where we were super
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: anxious because we're just waiting for something to go wrong,
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: and you have little moments where baby doesn't move that much,
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: and you might have one or two day period where
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: previously baby was really active and now it's not, and
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: so you just you know, like you're just waiting for
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: those signs that something might be going wrong. And it's
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: so hard because you know, when you do experience a miscarriage,
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: like wasn't as if Laura did anything wrong. You know,
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: it's not as if she like behaves in a certain
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: way which encouraged a miscarriage to happen. It's just unfortunately,
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: just part of life. It wasn't meant to be just happened,
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: and so you just you just got to be this
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: passenger on the journey and just hope and pray that
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: you know it's going to turn out all right.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: Fortunately I haven't had to experience that feeling of a miscarriage,
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: but when it does happen, what sort of feelings come
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: to the surface.
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: I think the first time it happened, we were overseas
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: and Laura experienced a little bit of bleeding, and that
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: bleeding progress, it got a little bit heavier, and I
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: remember her saying to me, like, oh, like, there's a
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: lot of blood here, and you know, you instantly you
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: realize it's not a good sign, and there's not a
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: whole lot you can do, Like you just have to
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: like a you're kind of hoping that the bleeding stops,
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: and then you go to the doctors, you get scans done,
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: and you know, you're kind of just hoping, hoping that
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: you get good news. And I think I I think
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: I was preparing myself for the bad news. There was
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: so much bleeding over a longer period of time, so
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: I kind of thought to myself, like my intuition was
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: that this is really.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: Not good and do they give you a reason, there's
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: no reason.
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: So we found out we had scans done, there was
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: no longer a heartbeat, so we knew that we had
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: lost the baby. And there's not the hardest thing is
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: there's not like a specific reason. You know, it's not
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: like they say, because you did X, we lost the baby,
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: you know, which almost would be easier to stomach because.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: You know what to do not to do next time.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it exactly if it was that, but it's
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: not because you know, I remember for Laura, her biggest
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: thought was why I've done something to make this pregnancy.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: When she hasn't, not at all.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and like that the biggest bit of communication was
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: to Laura that this is not your fault, Like you
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: haven't caused this, you know, there's nothing wrong with you
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: because obviously you're carrying the baby. And she's like, well,
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: maybe I'm not a good carrier. Yeah, maybe there's something
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: wrong with my body that means that I'm not going
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: to be able to carry a baby. And like Laura
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: was so worried that it was something that she had
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: done her there's something that was wrong with her. So
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: you're trying to like trying to communicate and reassure her
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: that like, she hasn't done anything wrong here. The best
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: way that I could digest the situation is that you
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: kind of think like it was always going to happen
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: this way, and they they can test for level of
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: hormones and sometimes like the more hormones you have is
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: a good sign. But my mum told me this. She
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: just said that sometimes the body just has to do
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: a test run and there's no like medical backing for this.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: I think it was just an easy way of my body.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: It was an easy way for me to kind of
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: see the situation from the point of view that it
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: was just body making sure that everything was where it
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: needed to be to prepare for the one that was
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: going to be the one and so but yeah, and afterwards,
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: you kind of think, from my perspective, you know, I
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: was obviously upset because that baby that I was imagining
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: was gone. It was you know, it was never going
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: to be. And then you can't help it think like
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: what could have been, Like what could have been that
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: little baby if it had made it, And you can't
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: help it think about that outcome. But then as well,
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: for law, she's dealing with the emotional distress of a miscarriage,
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: but in the physical side as well, you know, it's
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: really uncomfortable. You know, it's I'm lucky that for a guy,
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: you know, I could go for a run and try
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: and get my mind off things, whereas doorphins and totally
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: do something to distract myself. But for a woman, you know,
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: they're dealing with it like every second of the day.
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: Like physically it hurts as well. So it's it's there's
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: a constant reminder of what they're experiencing, so they don't
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: have the ability to switch off from it.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: For your first one, what point how far along? I
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: think we're about twelve weeks, Okay, so it can happen
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: and figure my ignorance again, it can happen in different circums,
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: different times.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, it's obviously a higher risk of miscarriage earlier on. Yeah,
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: and so there's kind of that reassurance in my mind,
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: like now I'm like, okay, well, every every week that
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: we don't have any issue is a week that we're
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: kind of like, not the clear, but we're kind of
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: itching towards being in a place where we don't have
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: to worry every day about it. And as hard as well,
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: because when you're in the first twelve weeks, we've been
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: conditioned not to tell people, Yeah, for sure. And I
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: remember mates who would be like eight weeks pregnant and
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: they would tell people that. I'd be like, what are
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: you doing, Like you can't you shouldn't be telling people,
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: because I actually think now it's really stupid. I think
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: whoever said you shouldn't tell anyone before twelve.
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: We look back at that, you're like, tell everyone because
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: it's a thing as well, Like when I was saying,
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: like I was trying to find the words where it's like, yeah, okay,
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: you're not going to be celebrating because you've got this
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: fear still, which it's completely normal. But then also it's like,
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: why will suffer alone with it totally because you're already
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: I mean, for Laura in the first instance that happened,
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: You've got the physical side of it. You mentioned the
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: mental side of it, and also the self worth side
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: of it as well. But then also it's like like
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: I can only and it's going to lead me into
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: my next question. I can only really talk to Matt
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: about this, But my next question is if we're all
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: out here talking about it as someone who's close to
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: Laura other than you, how do you think that they
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: could have supported.
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: It's hard because you know, if someone is in the
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: early stages of pregnancy, unless you're ash Wicks, where you're
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: very dialed into being able to guess it, no one's
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: going to know. And so it's it's a really heavy
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: topic to bring up with someone who doesn't know what
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: you're going through. You know, if in that moment after
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: it had happened, and someone asked me a question of hey, Matt,
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: how are you, if you respond and go, well, we
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: just found out we lost a baby, You're like, first
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: of all, shit, you didn't know your Laura was pregnant
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: and then you've lost it. Like, it's it's such.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: A big it's a big, heavy subject, heavy subject, you know,
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: and obviously there's a few people who are that close
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: to you where you can bring it up.
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: Like obviously my family, they like we could talk about it,
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: but because we didn't tell anyone that we would trying,
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: We didn't tell anyone that Laura was pregnant when we
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: lost the baby. Yeah, we were just it was just
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: something that we internalized and so I didn't I didn't
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: bring it up with anybody as well, and I was
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: I didn't want to bring it up and draw attention
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: to something that I don't know if Laura wanted people
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: to know about. But I think the biggest surprise is
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: it is so so common. Yeah, so many people know
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: about it. Laura spoke about it on Life on Cut
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: after it happened, like a little while after, and there
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: was surprising how many people came out and said, oh,
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: we've also experienced that, because in my head, stupidly, I
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: thought it was something that was like one in twenty
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: or like you know, yeah, it's like one and two almost.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: It's wild. It's wild, how big. And before you have kids,
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: you have no idea about that stat whatsoever, Before you
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: fall pregnant, you have no idea about the stats, the complications,
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: the variations, the variables, everything involved until you're actually going
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: through it. But like, looking back, do you think that
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: if you after it happened the first time, do you
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: think if that you didn't internalize it so much then
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: and you were more vocal with it about closer to you,
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: do you think it would have helped you with your worries? Now? Oh?
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: No, I don't think it would have helped my worry
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: now I think I think if we did, like Heaven forbid, touch,
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: would we lose this baby? I know that I would
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: tell a lot more people. I would be so much
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: more vocal with it and open with it and not
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: feel like I was being such a burden in bringing
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: it up with other people in conversation.
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and do you think if you knew that back
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: then you would have been able to process about it? Oh?
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, It's like, I'm very fortunate that I haven't had
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: to deal with a huge amount of trauma in my life,
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: and that is probably one of the ones that was
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: like top of the list. The moments where you talk
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: about it makes it so much easier to make sense
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: of the whole situation. You know, It's it can be
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: a dangerous thing just having these internalized thoughts that never
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: get the chance to have a voice out in the open.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: It needs the oxygen one hundred percent, right, because, like
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: we're talking, so many people are going through the same
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: thing but doing it in silence. And then think of
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: how all those people that go through it don't try
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: again because they're too scared or haven't had a conversation
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: with someone like you who's tried again and again.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: And it's happened again, and then you're willing to.
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: Go through that again for the ultimate reward, which is parenthood.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And I think the message to anyone who has
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: experienced a miscarriage is that it's not your fault and unfortunately,
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: for whatever reason, it just wasn't meant to be. So,
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: I mean, I will as time progresses, I will start
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: to celebrate it more.
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: I hope so.
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: And there's a part of me that goes, am I
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: an idiot for having a third child?
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: Are we like the moment? Yes and no.
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: The moment we've just come to a point where we
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: finally kind of got control to a certain degree with parenting.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: We feel like we're getting the upper hand.
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: The kids understand what you're saying.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, they might not do what you've said that
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: You're at a stage now where both girls are at
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: an age where they understand if you did raise your
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: voice enough, you could get some law and order. You know.
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: I can't begin to tell you how much easier parenting
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: is when you can communicate with your child and they
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: can say I'm hungry, I'm cold, I have a saw
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: a tummy, I have a headache, I want a glass
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: of water. That is an amazing position to be in.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: And I'm like far out to get to the point
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: where I've got a little blob back to a guessing game.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: The guessing game, I'm like, ash am I an idiot?
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: No? Okay, great, No, I don't think you're an idiot. Honestly,
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: not for me. If you guys have made the decision.
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: Obstetrician was like, we came in and the first thing
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: you said was what the hell are you guys doing?
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: You're out. You're well and truly going to be outnumbered,
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: which is something that people warn you about. But you
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: just don't know. If you're looking at what my life's
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: going to be like with three and you think that's
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: what makes this family feel plea, then you haven't done the.
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: Wrong A should you know who helped me?
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: Who is Aimes?
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: On the poetic When she was like it's cool, yeah,
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: this is on you, Ames. But when she was like,
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: Ames's I guess we had on a little while ago.
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: She's got four kids, and she was like no, it
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: gets easier, and I was like, where's Laura.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: No, congratulations and thank you for sharing all of that
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: with us. Off the back of that, Matthew there's a
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: very important decision that needs to be made, and you've
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: got plenty of time to do that, and that is
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: what you were going to name this child. Now, there
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: are I'm not gonna say good and bad names, but
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: let's face it, there are names that you associate with
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: bad behave.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I think everyone grows up and names have a
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: certain image attached to it based on the kids that
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: you went to school with.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh for sure. Yeah.
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: And so there are names where like Laura and I
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: were going through potential names at the moment, and I'm like, well,
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: we can't call it that because I had one of
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: those names at my school and that were so naughty.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: So I thought we should do like our top three
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: noughty names, naughty names Matthew, Okay, all right, So my
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: first one Billy.
• 43:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we used to have a kid at school, Billy.
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: He's stunk, but also he was such a naughty kid.
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Billy's are very naughty, Yeah, very cheeky. For me,
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: it's more of a it's a J names that start
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: with jay.
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah.
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: So number three for me is gi Ji is aughty name. Yeah, Okay.
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: I never had a joy that I can recall to
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: any gys out there.
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: I apologize. I don't mean to stuff.
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: You're all evil, those parents out there being like that
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: was our name for a kid? Cross that out. Number two?
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Jake, Oh yeah, I got a couple.
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's the Jay's, dude, Jesus.
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'm going to throw a girl's name in the mix.
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: And again, if this is your name and you're very
• 44:11
  Speaker 2: well behaved, I'm sorry to offend.
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: But Evie e is it cheeky? Very close to evil?
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: Yes?
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: Right, suspiciously close. What's your number one? Number one? Which
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: I think was going to be similar? If it's a
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: boy Nathan Nathan.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: I knew and Nathan in school and he was quite nice.
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: He's my only actually there was there was one nice
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: and there's one evil. The difference my number one. Going
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: back to Jay's, it's the Jay's. You've got to be
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: worried about Jared.
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, I was going shivers down my spine.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: If your child is becoming friends with another child called Jared,
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: just be very careful, have your guard up, be warned.
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: Because that's a naughty fucking That.
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: Is a naughty and if it's not naughty, now we'll
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: be naughty in the.
• 45:06
  Speaker 3: Future that's a future criminal.
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: They cannot fight the naughtiness once they have the tag
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: of Jared. There's only one path in life that will take.
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: Jared's the new Ivan. I'm going to say it, say
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: that Jared my Latt has her into it. Actually I like.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: It so yeah, So luckily I don't have to worry
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: about Jay's for this baby. I don't have any names
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: in the mix Jessica, Jessica and am I just jess
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: It old Jeffica.
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: Jesse Bear our producer's nicknames. Bella not a fan, although
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: Bella for sure it's to be killed.
• 45:48
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  Speaker 2: in the following weeks. Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the
• 46:38
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• 46:43
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• 46:49
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