Latest / Sex Advice for Seniors Podcast / Pelvic Floor Health After 50: Stop Bladder Leaks & Improve Sexual Wellness | MaryEllen Reider

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Pelvic Floor Health After 50: Stop Bladder Leaks & Improve Sexual Wellness | MaryEllen Reider · Sex Advice for Seniors Podcast

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  [music]
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  SPEAKER_01: And a quick note from our friends at Oh My Bod,
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_01: because sexual wellness deserves attention at every age.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: Explore their elegant, connected designs at ohmybod.com.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's O-H-M-I-B-O-D dot com.
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  [music]
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  SPEAKER_01: Hi, this is Suzanne, and you are listening to Sex Advice for Seniors.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: And I am delighted to be back with somebody who...
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: I recorded with,
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: I think it was in Vietnam or something,
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: and then it all went really, hey, it just didn't work out.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: So I decided we needed to do that all over again,
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  SPEAKER_01: specifically because what we're talking about is something that I know impacts
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  SPEAKER_01: so many women,
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  SPEAKER_01: especially,
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  SPEAKER_01: which is urinary incontinence and pelvic floor issues and all of that sort
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: of fun stuff that we often experience sometimes.
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  SPEAKER_01: In later life,
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  SPEAKER_01: after childbirth,
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  SPEAKER_01: you know,
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  SPEAKER_01: different stages of our life where we find ourselves suddenly feeling uncomfortable
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  SPEAKER_01: and ashamed about issues that, frankly, are not really pleasant.
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  SPEAKER_01: And Mary Ellen Readers,
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  SPEAKER_01: the co-director of Yarlap,
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  SPEAKER_01: Which is an FDA-cleared wellness device designed to treat urinary incontinence
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  SPEAKER_01: and enhance feminine performance,
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  SPEAKER_01: which means better orgasms,
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  SPEAKER_01: ladies, and experience improved pelvic floor muscle control.
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  SPEAKER_01: And she's based in Ohio.
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  SPEAKER_01: So welcome to the world of Sex Advice for Seniors.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for having me again.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm so glad that we could finally get the timing on this right and everything.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: And you know what?
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  SPEAKER_01: I think some people especially,
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: they hear pelvic floor and they kind of vaguely know what it means.
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  SPEAKER_01: I must admit, until somebody told me the area that was involved, I had no clue what it was.
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  SPEAKER_01: So what exactly is it and why is it so important?
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  SPEAKER_00: First thing I think I want to say is everybody has.
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  SPEAKER_00: When it doesn't matter man or female, like man or woman, you have a pelvic floor.
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  SPEAKER_00: A lot of the times a common question that we get at Yarlap is like, do I have one?
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  SPEAKER_00: Yes, you do.
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  SPEAKER_00: It is a group of muscles that are based at your pubic bone connecting to your spine.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if you're a visual learner like I am, imagine a hammock.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's basically that.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's a group of muscles that holds a lot of important things into natural position.
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  SPEAKER_00: In yoga, it's considered the root or the base of everything.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And again,
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  SPEAKER_00: group of muscles for women,
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  SPEAKER_00: they hold your uterus and your bladder and those visceral organs into place.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so you want to make sure that that pelvic floor muscle group is really toned.
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  SPEAKER_00: The issue with that is that it's very isolated.
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  SPEAKER_00: There's no way to see it externally.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so the exercises we're told to do are often really,
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  SPEAKER_00: really difficult to do with the correct protocol.
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  SPEAKER_00: That's what it is.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's a group of muscles that support organs into their natural position.
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  SPEAKER_01: As you said, men have them as well.
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  SPEAKER_01: And often,
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's after prostate surgery,
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  SPEAKER_01: stuff like that,
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  SPEAKER_01: often that's the first thing they're told is,
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  SPEAKER_01: you know,
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  SPEAKER_01: you need to get your pelvic floor muscles really toned because that can lead
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  SPEAKER_01: to all sorts of other issues as well.
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  SPEAKER_01: So it's not just a female problem,
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  SPEAKER_01: but the way that men deal with it is different, of course, than the way women.
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  SPEAKER_01: So many people.
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  SPEAKER_01: So here in the United States, it's one in three, I believe now.
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  SPEAKER_01: It used to be one in four.
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  SPEAKER_01: Now it's one in three.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: Women in the United States will suffer from some form of urinary incontinence.
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  SPEAKER_00: So like urinary incontinence is the involuntary leakage of urine.
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  SPEAKER_00: So if you accidentally pee when you like laugh, sneeze,
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  SPEAKER_00: cough when you're working out,
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  SPEAKER_00: jumping on a trampoline,
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  SPEAKER_00: running after your toddler,
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  SPEAKER_00: something like that,
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  SPEAKER_00: and you accidentally pee yourself, that's what we're kind of talking about.
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  SPEAKER_00: And the University of Michigan and AARP,
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  SPEAKER_00: I believe – A few years ago did a study and it's like one in two women over the age
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  SPEAKER_00: of 50 I believe or maybe 60 suffer from this.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you know somebody who has it and either you know that they have it
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  SPEAKER_00: or they aren't telling you but you know somebody who is suffering from this.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's a very common issue and a lot of people,
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  SPEAKER_00: like you said,
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  SPEAKER_00: believe it's just a chapter of their health or it's just something that they have
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  SPEAKER_00: to live with.
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  SPEAKER_00: For me, I was told when I was pregnant and after I had kids,
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  SPEAKER_00: it's like, this is part of being a mom.
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  SPEAKER_00: That's not true
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  SPEAKER_01: at all.
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  SPEAKER_00: This is a total myth.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's about the tone of your pelvic floor and you really want to make sure
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  SPEAKER_00: that those muscles are in shape because,
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  SPEAKER_00: again, like we were talking about, It is the root.
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  SPEAKER_00: It is the base.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's the foundation that holds your bladder, your uterus, and those organs all together.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you really want to make sure that those muscles are correctly toned,
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  SPEAKER_00: that they're strong,
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  SPEAKER_00: that And that they're doing what they're supposed to be doing because that can lead
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  SPEAKER_00: to a lot of things like unexplained knee pain,
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  SPEAKER_00: unexplained back pain, bladder leakage, that kind of stuff.
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  SPEAKER_00: So these muscles are really, really important.
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  SPEAKER_00: And just because bladder leakage is common does not mean that it's normal
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  SPEAKER_00: and it doesn't mean that this is just something you have to live with.
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  SPEAKER_00: There are solutions.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so power is kind of knowledge in that.
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  SPEAKER_01: But as I've heard you say, the consequence of it is things that I didn't know.
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  SPEAKER_01: For instance,
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  SPEAKER_01: knee pains or spinal problems,
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  SPEAKER_01: which I suspect lots of people do have and maybe don't associate with
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  SPEAKER_01: that being actually related to their pelvic floor.
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  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: I say our president.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's actually my dad.
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  SPEAKER_00: So affectionately,
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  SPEAKER_00: my dad has written articles about the structure of The pelvic floor within
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  SPEAKER_00: the female body and why it's so important.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's been published in the Journal of Women's Health, Care and Issues.
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  SPEAKER_00: And we have had people who report to us like you have unexplained back
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  SPEAKER_00: and muscle pain like in your knees and your back.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's because if you think, again,
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  SPEAKER_00: visual learner,
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  SPEAKER_00: if you think about your structure from your pelvic floor down to your knees,
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  SPEAKER_00: down to your ankles as kind of a gothic arch,
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  SPEAKER_00: When the top collapses because it's not toned and it's not strong,
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  SPEAKER_00: your back starts to compensate for that pressure and it tries to hold it up.
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  SPEAKER_00: But your back is not designed for that pressure and for that design, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: So it can only last so long.
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  SPEAKER_00: And then that gives out because it's so tired.
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  SPEAKER_00: And then where does it go?
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  SPEAKER_00: It goes down the arch towards the knees.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so we have reports of women who have like unexplained back and knee pain.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it's because those are the body parts.
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  SPEAKER_00: Those are the parts of the arch that are giving out because they're not designed
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  SPEAKER_00: to take on what your pelvic floor is originally designed for, but it's weak.
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  SPEAKER_00: Or it's atrophied, it's not toned properly, and it gets out.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you have all of these things that are happening because your pelvic floor isn't toned.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it goes off into like a sexual world as well.
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  SPEAKER_00: We have women who report like very lackluster orgasms,
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  SPEAKER_00: or you can't orgasm, or you don't feel it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And that's where, again, like the Yarlap can help.
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  SPEAKER_01: So you started this company with your dad.
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  SPEAKER_01: To create this product called the Yarlab,
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  SPEAKER_01: just explain to all of us what it is and what it does.
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  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
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  SPEAKER_00: So everybody always is surprised that I'm doing this with my dad,
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  SPEAKER_00: especially such like a taboo situation and area of the body.
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  SPEAKER_00: But the Yarlab is an FDA-cleared medical device
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  SPEAKER_00: to treat female urinary incontinence, but we're also able to prevent it.
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  SPEAKER_00: And we're also able to say that we help with sexual performance and expression.
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  SPEAKER_00: So all of that, again,
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  SPEAKER_00: just shows how integral your pelvic floor is in not just like a bladder sense,
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  SPEAKER_00: but also in a sexual wellness sense and like a gynecological sense as well,
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  SPEAKER_00: not just urology sense.
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  SPEAKER_00: So it's very whole encompassing.
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  SPEAKER_00: These muscles are very important to everything.
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  SPEAKER_00: But the Yarlap is a small little tool that you can insert like a tampon and it sends
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  SPEAKER_00: a signal to So
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  SPEAKER_00: like I said at the beginning,
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  SPEAKER_00: for females,
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  SPEAKER_00: there's no real way for us to look at what we're doing with these muscles.
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  SPEAKER_00: So like if you go to a gym and you're working out your abs or your arms
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  SPEAKER_00: or your legs, you usually look in the mirror and you can see how you're lifting.
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  SPEAKER_00: Do you have the proper form?
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  SPEAKER_00: Because if you're not doing the proper form, You're not getting the proper benefits.
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  SPEAKER_00: So with the pelvic floor, for us, it's deep and isolated.
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  SPEAKER_00: And there's no way for us to externally see
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  SPEAKER_00: if we're using those pelvic floor muscles correctly to get the benefits properly.
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  SPEAKER_00: So the Yarlap bridges that gap and does everything for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: And it sends a signal similar to the one that your brain would send
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  SPEAKER_00: to your pelvic floor,
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  SPEAKER_00: but it sends it from the device to the pelvic floor to work out the muscles for you.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: So you just sit there.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what the ER lab does.
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  SPEAKER_00: Because we found that like with women,
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: we would be given a pamphlet or very vague instructions on how to exercise
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: the pelvic floor.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: And you end up using your butt, your abs, your thighs to do it.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: Again, we just bridged that gap, that guesswork, and that anxiety.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_00: Just get rid of all of it.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yarlap does the entire workout for you.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like electrical signals that it's sending out, yeah?
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: So it's like a very gentle pulse almost.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_01: Like a tennis machine kind of thing.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of people are like, well, I have to do it along with the Yarlap.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: The Yarlap was specifically designed for the person to just sit there.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: So literally all you're doing is sitting there
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  SPEAKER_00: reading a book or watching TV
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: or doing something,
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  SPEAKER_00: but you're not doing it alone because, again, this is a really complicated exercise.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: Not because the instructions are complicated,
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: but because we can't see what's physically going on.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like a penis goes up and down if you're doing a Kegel.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: We don't have that.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: So we can't see if we're doing the exercise properly.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: Those are deep isolated muscles.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: And so the Yarlap was designed so that you just sit there and you know
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: that you're getting those exercises.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_01: And does it adapt as the muscle becomes more toned or change in any way?
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_01: Or is it just a consistent pattern and it's just a case of maintenance?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: It's both.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: So you start off working it out, right?
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: And you're doing a proper routine for it, three to five days a week.
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  SPEAKER_00: And then you no longer are having these issues.
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  SPEAKER_00: Your pelvic floor is toned.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: And then we go into maintenance.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: And then you're really only using it once a week,
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: once every other week, just to maintain that tone.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: That's how it goes.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Is it over a period of weeks,
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: you're going to get that muscle tone that you've been really, really wanting before?
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: And then we go into maintenance because just like any other muscle,
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: you got to use it or you lose it.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_01: In the circumstance where somebody's starting out with it,
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: how many weeks before they see some sort of evidence that it's working?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: We say 2 to 12, and that's a really broad window.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: And again,
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: the Yarl app,
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: we help people who are using it as a preventative measure,
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: like they've seen their mom or their grandmother or their sister going through it
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: and they're like, I don't want to do that.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: I want to make sure that I'm doing this properly.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: All the way to people who have had no tone,
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  SPEAKER_00: their muscles are so atrophied or weakened or just never used
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: that sometimes they don't even know they're using the restroom
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: until they're realizing that their pants are wet.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: So we have a broad sense of treatment.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: So it's 2 to 12 weeks, and it's because we take in everybody.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: And can we say that people who are larger generally are more prone to this
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_01: than people who are not?
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: So for the Yar Lab, it doesn't matter.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: For women,
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_00: I feel personally,
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: it is almost easier to list reasons how you wouldn't have urinary incontinence
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: than it would.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: You do.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: Because, I mean, you have weight.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: Age, menopause, perimenopause, pregnancy, pre-pregnancy.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: If you are an athlete,
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_00: if you're not an athlete,
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: we're almost set up basically to have some form of it because it's such
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: an integral part to your health, but nobody talks about it.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: So then nobody's using these muscles.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody's toning these muscles.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so over time, we're getting this issue.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's really, really important is, yeah, weight could be a factor.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: It could be six other things.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's just genuinely like an unlucky draw.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, like you said, it's so widespread that it could be for any number of reasons.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_01: And obviously,
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: you know,
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: one of the biggest issues I would suspect,
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: especially amongst older people,
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_01: is that it can really affect your confidence and it can really affect your dating.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_01: If you've recently got divorced,
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_01: if it's something that you're experiencing,
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_01: you What emotional or relational patterns do you see people coming to you
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: that have this issue?
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: So for Yarlap,
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_00: we have a lot of people who are,
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: like you just said,
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_00: they're getting back into the dating game or they're like empty nesters for a while
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: and they're finally going back out on dates with their partners
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: or they've gotten divorced and they're going back out on dates with their partners
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: or they're trying to get intimate again.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: And what they're using is Whether that's panty liners or pads,
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: diapers, whatever, just don't make them feel sexy.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: And then we have this thing with jokes, right?
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm going to laugh, I'm going to pee myself.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: And then you become the butt of the joke and you don't realize it,
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: but that slowly chips away at your confidence.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: And we do have a lot of people who suffer from depression and anxiety over it
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: or they report to us about that.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_00: You think you're the only one that has this problem.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: There's no end in sight.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's a big one is like it's just a never-ending cycle.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: And what we hope to provide is a break in that cycle and a little bit of hope
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: because,
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: again, it's the lack of awareness about these muscles and about toning them.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so we have people who use it for like the sexual reason, one of my favorites.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: We had a woman who had bladder leaks and she got the R-Lap and she called into us
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: because she was slowly getting the sensation for an orgasm back.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: And she said that her husband wanted to buy a Yarlap for every room in the house
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: because all of a sudden it was like they were teenagers again.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, we did it in the back of the car in the grocery store parking lot.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, I love the story.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: I love the confidence it's instilled back in you.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that's so wonderful.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: And she was like 70 or something like that.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: And it was just rejuvenation of her confidence.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that we are part of that.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: When you bring back sensation in your vagina, right?
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_01: And you've not really experienced that before because,
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: as you said,
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: that your muscles may be so weak that orgasms just don't feel like anything.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: And I have to admit that when I've used similar devices in the past, right?
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I've definitely noticed the difference in orgasms.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_01: I think that was probably the first thing I noticed actually was just,
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_01: they just seemed a lot more powerful.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_01: And the contractions seem to be much stronger just generally.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I noticed that I love it.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_01: I think a lot of us imagine that one of the consequences of aging,
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: and we're told this, let's face it, we're
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_01: I've been told this by healthcare professionals.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_01: You're an older woman.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's not going to be the same.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: It's going to take longer.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's not going to feel as intense.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_01: It's all negative, right?
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: It's all negative.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_01: And then you do this and you're like, wow, that was amazing.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_01: So it's inaccurate.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: You want to have the correct tools and resources.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: And there is, again, that huge gap because...
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: Especially for like female, like sexual health and wellness, there's been a huge boom.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: And there are tools and devices,
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: lubricants and all kinds of things now that are available that can have
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_00: a really good positive impact.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: You just have to know where you are and where you stand.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_00: And so for when it comes to pelvic floor muscles,
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: the stronger response to the orgasm,
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_00: I love that you said that because the clitoris runs right along
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_00: the pelvic floor muscle.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_01: And your clitoris,
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure your listeners know,
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: but in case you don't, it's basically an iceberg.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: So you only see a tiny bit of it, but it's really vast internally.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_00: And it runs along the pelvic floor.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: And when you have an orgasm and you have a pulsing feeling,
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_00: a pulsing sensation, that's your pelvic floor.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_00: There are different theories of thoughts,
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: but one of the theories of thought is that for women,
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_00: your orgasm is a maintenance tool to make sure that your pelvic floor stays toned.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: Because again,
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: when you're having an orgasm,
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: you're having that pulsating feeling, that's your pelvic floor muscle reacting.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so if you have a toned pelvic floor muscle that has a strong response
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_00: When you're in this moment of euphoric orgasm,
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: your body knows what it's doing and goes, hold on, I can do this.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm very good at it.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm very strong when it happens.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so you have a stronger response to the orgasm
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: because your pelvic floor secondhand knows exactly what to do.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_00: And because, again, it lies along that clitoris, you have this really intense orgasm.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: And so it works all together, right?
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_00: The female body is amazing that it's not compartmentalized.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_00: Everything kind of bleeds into itself.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: So your pelvic floor is a structural foundation that holds, yeah,
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_00: the bladder and the uterus and everything,
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: but it also lies right along that clitoris.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: And so it also works within your response to the orgasm.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_01: There's just been some research that I've been reading about the clitoris,
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_01: about female orgasm, because so much of this was just completely unresearched.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_01: Like, nobody really knew how any of us worked, frankly.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_01: There's been...
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_01: Blood flow.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, respiration of those muscles.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: So a lot of people,
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: when they think about pelvic floor training,
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: they think about Kegel exercises only and very good,
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_00: but it's not for everybody and it's not necessarily an all encompassing exercise.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_00: So the actual definition for a toned pelvic floor is the ability to clench,
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: Kegel, and relax on command.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: And it's very important that you have that whole thing in the Yarlap.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_00: Shameless plug, the Yarlap does give you that.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, It does.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: But relaxation is just as important because it helps with that blood flow.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: And like you said,
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: with those nerve endings and everything like that,
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: you really want to make sure that you have proper respiration,
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: you have proper oxygenation and everything like that down there
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: to make it fully kind of awakened, if you want to think of it that way.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_00: Fully awake, fully alert, fully sensationalized.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_00: And in The relaxation really helps bring in that blood flow.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: And that's really, really important, especially in pelvic floor rehabilitation.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: Not just clenching,
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: that's great,
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_00: but also making sure that you're able to respirate and breathe and bring in all
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: that blood flow.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: Super important to those muscles.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_01: And is there anything people need to be aware of when
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: using the Uralap?
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: The big thing is that you can't use it if you have a pacemaker.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_00: But other than that, you're fine.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: A big key,
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: just like anything else,
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_00: is that you want to make sure where you are on the spectrum of pelvic floor tone.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_00: So a lot of people,
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: like I said, they think that the Kegel exercises are like a one size fits all.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's all encompassing.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's the golden standard for everything.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_00: And in reality,
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: it's just like the most popular one because it's the one that everybody kind
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: of highlights when it comes to the orgasm.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not diminishing its importance.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: It's incredibly important.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: However, there are some people who have a hypertoned pelvic floor, which is too tight.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: And you don't want to clench an already tight muscle.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: You want to relax those pelvic floor muscles.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: And that's just as important in the tone.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: Again, and the Yarlop can do either one of those,
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: but just make sure that like you're not clenching an already clenched muscle.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_00: You're using it for the relaxation purposes and you're using it for the relaxation programs.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_00: You're teaching it kind of how to – it's not clenched all the time because
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_00: if you're clenched all the time – That is so much pressure and so much effort that
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: over time it weakens those pelvic floor muscles.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so you don't want to be clenched all the time.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: And you shouldn't be clenched all the time.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_00: You should be relaxed.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: That pelvic floor muscle should just be a happy medium between the two of them.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: And so we have the ability to...
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: Do the Kegel clenching and then also the relaxation programs as well.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: So I would say like if you're using it,
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_00: just be vigilant about where you are on that pelvic floor spectrum.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: If you're super clenched, use relaxation programs, right?
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_01: It sort of meets the needs of people on both ends of the spectrum.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_01: The people that are super tight, right?
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_01: And super clenched and the ones who need help with more support,
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_01: more muscle tone, just better strength in the pelvic floor area.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people are like, well, how do I know?
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_00: Well, first of all, talk to your doctor.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a licensed healthcare professional, so I can't diagnose.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_00: But a big report that we have, insertion is so painful.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: Penetrative sex is excruciating.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's uncomfortable.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Some people say it feels like stabbing.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: Or if you're getting like your normal gynecological pap,
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: that insertion is very difficult and it hurts and you're just like clenched
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: the entire time.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: Then you would just talk to your doctor and be like, where is the tone?
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: That's the question I want to ask is, what's the tone of my pelvic floor?
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_00: Where do I stand right now?
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_00: What do I need to do?
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_00: And a lot of people,
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_00: if you're like me,
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: you get to the doctor's office and they ask you how you're doing
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_00: and you automatically say, great, thanks, bye.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_00: And then it's over.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: In reality, just go in there with the question of like, Can you check my pelvic floor?
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: Where am I?
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: And then be on your merry way.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: And can your primary care physician assess that?
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, they should be able to.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, if not, maybe look at a different doctor.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, you should.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: They should be able to do that.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_01: I must admit, it's never a question that I've even considered asking a doctor.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I'd be curious to know if I did ask my doctor what they would say,
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_01: if they would be able to look at it and give me any indication or
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_01: whether they'd send me off to a gynecologist or a specialist for that.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_01: Because it's probably a question that considering the vast number
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_01: of Women especially that suffer from weak pelvic floor,
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_01: it's one of those questions that you think,
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_01: oh, that's probably a good question to ask the doctor, actually.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's just like, can you check the tone of my pelvic floor and tell me where I am?
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_00: And they should be able to do that if they're uncomfortable or they don't want
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_00: to do it or they want to send you off to a specialist,
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: then they send you to a gynecologist.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_00: That's fine.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: They'll definitely be able to do it.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: There's no problem in you asking any of your doctors what's going on with your body.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: And if they ever make you feel shamed or embarrassed or stupid for asking, that's a red flag.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_00: Most of the clinicians that we work with at Yarlap are so wonderful and they're
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: so excited that somebody is asking about this,
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_00: asking about the – that they're like aware that their pelvic floor exists.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_00: And that's how I think most clinicians are.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_00: Most doctors are just – And so if you ask that question –
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: Do it with full confidence because you're taking control of your health.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: How awesome is that?
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: And your doctor should respond to that in like.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_01: Even though we're talking about older people on Sex Advice for Seniors,
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_01: it seems to me that because this issue impacts women of all ages,
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_01: but I guess primarily starting with women who have had children, I'm
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_01: Is there an age that you recommend that women start working out their pelvic floor
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_01: so that they don't end up,
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_01: as so many people do,
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_01: with weak pelvic floor muscles with urinary incontinence and everything that comes
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_01: with it?
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: Start now.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_00: Do it now.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_00: My biggest thing is, again,
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_00: like when we were talking about that myth of like,
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_00: it's just a common part of being a woman.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's about the tone of your pelvic floor.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_00: And there's no age limit on that.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: You start whenever you are able to.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: There is no, I'm too old for this.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, no, no.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's just getting the right tools and the right resources and the right information.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: And that can start at any time at any age.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: For us, we notice it kind of in every age group.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of like a gamble on all of it.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: When you know about it, look into it and see if it's something that resonates with you.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_00: But your pelvic floor does need love and upkeep.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: So whenever you have time to kind of dive into it and give it that love and affection, do it.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_00: But never let anybody tell you it's too late.
• 28:21
  There's just absolutely no shame in it.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: I think a lot of people are like, well, I'm just too old.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_00: There's no point.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_00: That's so false.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_00: I want to just scream it and be like, that's so false.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's just a lack of information, awareness and resources.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: But now that you have that or you've like listened to this or anything like that, like...
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's about getting the proper tools and the resources and the information.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_00: And it's never, ever, ever too late to know what's going on with your body.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_01: 150%.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_01: Mary Ellen,
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_01: thank you so much for coming on Sex Advice for Seniors and educating me about
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: the pelvic floor.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you so much for having me.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_01: Just a quick nudge,
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: if you haven't visited sexadviceforseniors.com yet, what are you waiting for?
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's the place where curiosity, experience, and a little mischief all meet.