Latest / All Figured Out with Andrea Barr: Figuring Out Work, Life and Parenting / 21. Scotty Barr on figuring out how to navigate medical challenges, work and a baby on the way

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21. Scotty Barr on figuring out how to navigate medical challenges, work and a baby on the way · All Figured Out with Andrea Barr: Figuring Out Work, Life and Parenting

• 0:00
  Welcome back to the all figured out podcast.
• 0:02
  I'm your host, Andrea bar. Today, on the podcast, I am
• 0:05
  interviewing hands down the strongest person that I know
• 0:09
  Phil. I'm also incredibly lucky to get
• 0:12
  to call my husband. Scott Ivar is joining me today.
• 0:15
  Kicking off, an all figured out podcast first, as the first man
• 0:19
  to join me on the mic. Okay.
• 0:21
  I'm really, really biased here, but I honestly couldn't think of
• 0:23
  a better person to fill this role.
• 0:25
  My husband has had one, heck of a health life and career
• 0:29
  Journey. Knee.
• 0:30
  And this is actually the first time that he's sharing his story
• 0:33
  top to bottom and in such a public way.
• 0:36
  So who is this man that I've chosen to spend my life with
• 0:39
  well. Scotty Barger up in Whistler BC
• 0:41
  with a snowboard strapped to his feet and a Frisbee and hand.
• 0:44
  He was born with a congenital heart defect, which caused him
• 0:47
  to have a few cardiac-related surgeries when he was younger.
• 0:50
  But it really never slowed him down.
• 0:52
  And he lived a totally happy, very outdoorsy life throughout
• 0:56
  his 15-year marketing career. He's actually worked for some of
• 1:00
  And it has top advertising agencies.
• 1:02
  He's LED award winning campaigns across different brands, like
• 1:05
  Subaru, McDonald's and Dal and so many more and if you become
• 1:10
  friends with this guy, be warned, that you will be sent a
• 1:14
  lot of personalized. Funny content that he will send
• 1:17
  you direct via Instagram in your DMs. The best part about him is
• 1:23
  an again, I'm biased here but he is the best husband and father
• 1:27
  we have a two-year-old daughter Addy like Some of you might know
• 1:30
  if you listen to the podcast and we have one on the way currently
• 1:34
  very very pregnant sandwiching his entry into fatherhood when
• 1:38
  we had a d was a health Journey that he's going to be talking
• 1:42
  about today. That is pretty wild and it was a
• 1:46
  extremely crazy and traumatic Time.
• 1:48
  Spoiler alert were talking about eight surgeries in a year and a
• 1:52
  half, which brought him to a lifetime total of eleven.
• 1:55
  Cardiac-related surgeries. As my mom, says, everyone's got
• 1:59
  their stuff. And Scotty knows that many
• 2:01
  others have or will go through extraordinarily hard times.
• 2:05
  And so we both hope to share this episode that a big fat
• 2:09
  light is possible to find that the end of the tunnel and Scotty
• 2:12
  has some tips for you on how to survive the journey if that's
• 2:15
  you before diving in. I also want to share an extend,
• 2:18
  the offer that both Scotty and I are extremely passionate about
• 2:22
  supporting others, who are going through really hard challenging
• 2:25
  medical times from Scotty's perspectives a patient or might
• 2:28
  as a caregiver Please don't hesitate to reach out.
• 2:31
  If you're feeling alone in your own journey.
• 2:33
  I always recommend counseling for anybody, at any stage of
• 2:37
  Life at any time, but if you're craving support from someone who
• 2:41
  can say, I get it, we are here for you.
• 2:43
  So, without further Ado, my husband, Scotty bar.
• 2:48
  You're listening to the all figured out podcast, I'm your
• 2:51
  host Aundrea bar. As a career coach for parents, a
• 2:56
  mom and entrepreneur. And someone who spent ten plus
• 2:59
  years in the corporate world, I still don't have it all figured
• 3:02
  out and maybe you don't. Either this podcast, I'll share
• 3:06
  tools and strategies that I use as my clients and in the many
• 3:09
  areas where I don't have things figured out.
• 3:11
  I'll be bringing you some amazing guest experts to help us
• 3:14
  fill in the gaps. So tune in each week as we
• 3:17
  explore how to make career and life decisions that truly work
• 3:20
  for you, your family and your big goals.
• 3:24
  Let's make moves. Well today is a different
• 3:29
  episode one that I am equal parts excited and maybe a bit
• 3:34
  nervous for Welcome to the podcast.
• 3:36
  My husband, the love of my life, the apple of my eye Scotty far,
• 3:42
  thank you so much for joining me today.
• 3:44
  You know, when I agreed with you, that you need a more male
• 3:46
  representation on your podcast. This is not what I had in mind.
• 3:51
  Guess number one. I mean, who better, then my
• 3:55
  husband? So I know lots about you, but as
• 3:58
  always, I feel like whenever I interview people who I know,
• 4:01
  intimately, I always learn something new.
• 4:03
  So I'm actually very excited to see where this goes.
• 4:06
  For those who don't know, you, lots of listeners, do know you
• 4:09
  friends and family. But for those who don't know,
• 4:11
  you can you share a bit about who you are and more
• 4:14
  specifically for the theme of today's episode?
• 4:17
  Can you share what the last five years or so have looked like for
• 4:21
  you? Sure I can do that.
• 4:22
  I feel like this is a test into whether I actually was Dear
• 4:26
  episode around, how to introduce yourself.
• 4:31
  I am Scotty bar. I am a marketer by trade.
• 4:36
  I've spent the last 15 years working in, mainly the
• 4:41
  advertising World working as a client lead.
• 4:44
  That means the bridge between the agency and the client
• 4:48
  themselves. Solving the clients business
• 4:50
  problems through Creative Solutions that the agency can
• 4:53
  provide over the course of my career.
• 4:55
  I've been fortunate Went to work at some of Canada's top,
• 4:58
  creative agencies, working on some Brands and doing some
• 5:03
  award-winning work for clients like Subaru.
• 5:06
  AutoTrader McDonald's Del Technologies.
• 5:10
  The was could go on forever when I'm not at work.
• 5:13
  I am spending time with my family, which includes my lovely
• 5:18
  wife. You have to say that.
• 5:21
  Yeah. Even when you stick me in a
• 5:22
  podcast Booth, our two-year-old daughter.
• 5:26
  And our soon-to-be addition to the family, which is coming from
• 5:31
  the time of this recording and about kind of four to five
• 5:34
  weeks. They really fit this in down to
• 5:37
  the wire. Yeah.
• 5:39
  And as Andrew mentioned, I also, which will be talking about
• 5:43
  today. I guess, I've had a bit of a
• 5:45
  interesting Health Journey over the last couple years as well.
• 5:48
  I think you did listen to that episode, that was a nice intro.
• 5:50
  I really liked how you kind of pissed yourself from the
• 5:52
  marketing perspective, like a few, you know, handguns going
• 5:56
  on. Off, obviously, doing the
• 5:58
  marketing pitches a bit easier because I've been on a lot of
• 6:01
  conversations with potential clients, where you have to give
• 6:03
  yourself your background and what tends to revolve around
• 6:07
  clients? You worked on and the years and
• 6:09
  business. The stuff I need to brush up on
• 6:11
  is the outside of work and what I like to do and I wonder, I
• 6:15
  guess is probably a good Bridge into our topic for today when
• 6:18
  people ask you currently. So, how are the last couple of
• 6:21
  years for you? Knowing what I know about your
• 6:24
  last couple years? How do you respond?
• 6:26
  That maybe that can take you into telling a bit of a story
• 6:28
  about your health Journey. Last couple years has been
• 6:31
  interesting for sure that tends to be the answer that I give
• 6:35
  words honest, but leaves some things unanswered, but to give
• 6:41
  your listeners, just a bit more perspective.
• 6:43
  So, for context, I have a congenital heart defect.
• 6:46
  I had three heart-related surgeries.
• 6:49
  By the time I was 11 years old. My first one was when I was six
• 6:53
  months old, which now being a father, I I can't imagine what
• 6:57
  my parents would have gone through at six months old, when
• 7:00
  I had my first surgery and thinking about what that would
• 7:02
  be like if we had to deal with something somewhere on our end
• 7:05
  and thankfully, our daughters completely LT from our
• 7:09
  perspective. And all tests are positive.
• 7:13
  As far as our future baby coming in a few weeks.
• 7:17
  If I was bored, I've lived I would say pretty ordinary life
• 7:21
  for somebody. Who's had three art surgeries?
• 7:24
  I didn't feel like I was Were wrapped in bubble wrap or
• 7:28
  anything to that extent, when it came to Growing Up and being
• 7:33
  active and playing outside and throw myself, all over the
• 7:36
  ultimate field and living in Whistler which should give that
• 7:39
  context. This isn't just playing outside.
• 7:41
  This is playing on mountains. Yeah, spent a lot of time
• 7:46
  snowboarding and mountain biking so forth fast forward.
• 7:50
  I always knew that there was potential for additional
• 7:53
  surgeries in my lifetime. Some of those surgeries that I I
• 7:56
  had when I was young included replacement of mitral valve and
• 8:01
  they put in an artificial valve. So as you can, imagine the size
• 8:04
  that they were able to shoehorn into a three-year-old will
• 8:08
  slowly get a bit too small. So at the age of, I guess it was
• 8:15
  early. 2019 age of? 35, the doctors felt like it was
• 8:19
  time for a tune-up. What was going in?
• 8:23
  We thought was going to be one surgery, actually, Up being 3.
• 8:28
  So it was an interesting time for us and from there it just
• 8:33
  went on and kind of spiraled and over the course of about 18
• 8:38
  months, ended up being eight surgeries and total that were
• 8:42
  heart-related are complication related and those three
• 8:45
  surgeries to start out with those were even though we
• 8:49
  thought it was going to be one surgery.
• 8:50
  We knew in advance it was going to be three.
• 8:53
  Yeah it's right. Going into the meeting with the
• 8:55
  surgeon. At that time we thought it was
• 8:58
  going to be one surgery to repair my aortas.
• 9:02
  The big artery that's coming out of the heart.
• 9:05
  We went in to chat to him and he said actually it's going to be
• 9:08
  more like three because we need to do some tune ups and other
• 9:12
  areas to ensure that your heart is operating at optimal capacity
• 9:18
  for us to do this surgery on your aorta.
• 9:22
  So, upfront going into those surgeries, we knew that it was
• 9:25
  going to come in. Form of three.
• 9:28
  So I guess, let's start there. So, this is pretty kids, but
• 9:31
  posts getting married starting a life in Vancouver.
• 9:34
  The world is our oyster, how did you prepare for those three
• 9:38
  surgeries? It was a different experience.
• 9:41
  Obviously being an adult when I was a kid, and I had my last
• 9:45
  surgery, you know, obviously, I don't remember for surgery at
• 9:48
  six months and the one at three, the one at 11, my parents
• 9:52
  actually didn't tell me. I was going in for surgery until
• 9:55
  the day. Before I was going in and the
• 9:57
  rationale for that was just a white me, continue being a kid
• 10:01
  and playing and not worrying about those things.
• 10:04
  So being an adult, obviously it was a different experience.
• 10:07
  I knew going in that this was going to be happening and it was
• 10:13
  on me in terms of preparing for that and what that would look
• 10:16
  like. So a couple things that come to
• 10:19
  mind various random things that I did to prepare first and
• 10:23
  foremost, I went to Spotify and I created My walk up playlist
• 10:28
  and you can imagine for any boxer, any fighter going into a
• 10:33
  big fight as they're walking into that ring?
• 10:35
  They've got that song playing. That is just going to motivate
• 10:39
  them and get them prepared for what lies ahead.
• 10:41
  So that was important to me. When it came time to drive over
• 10:46
  to have. Those surgeries andreea Took the
• 10:49
  Wheel, she drove in the car. We put that playlist on and I
• 10:53
  just sat with my thoughts and let That play and tried to get
• 10:58
  myself psyched up for what was coming.
• 11:00
  What were the thoughts that we're going through your head?
• 11:02
  At that point? I mean, obviously, there was
• 11:05
  concern over outcome was going to be a big one getting to a
• 11:09
  point in my life where I just felt so solid in terms of my
• 11:15
  wife our little family that we're looking forward to
• 11:18
  creating and I didn't want this to really prevent that from
• 11:23
  coming to fruition which kind of leads to The next thing that was
• 11:27
  helpful, during that time, I will listen to a timely podcast
• 11:31
  around that time, not knowing that it would be as helpful as
• 11:34
  it was and it was a sports psychologist, who was talking to
• 11:38
  GSP Georges st. Pierre.
• 11:40
  Who's the famous Canadian UFC fighter?
• 11:43
  And on that podcast, you talked about visualizing the upcoming
• 11:47
  fights. And for him, you said, most
• 11:50
  people it would ultimately, when you be thinking about the fight
• 11:53
  it would go, - he would start. Seeing what if I got hit really
• 11:57
  hard and knocked down? Or what if I got put in some
• 12:01
  sort of a whole their position where I was concerned?
• 12:05
  I might not be able to get out of.
• 12:06
  So he said it's natural to be thinking - when it comes to
• 12:10
  those visualizations. But his important way that he
• 12:14
  went about it is he said I never stopped the visualization in the
• 12:18
  - I will always see it through and continue it through and not
• 12:23
  ended until it ends, on a positive note.
• 12:26
  So, when he got into that holder La La Que, it's himself.
• 12:30
  How would I get out of it? How would I rise to the occasion
• 12:34
  and move forward in a positive way?
• 12:36
  And for me, that was just really helpful because ultimately
• 12:40
  thinking, about those situations and wrapping my head around what
• 12:43
  light I had, it would always tend to go - for me and so it
• 12:46
  was awful to just let myself get to that - place but know that I
• 12:51
  went and that situation there and I would just keep moving
• 12:55
  forward until it. Was and you know, I'm positive.
• 12:58
  What if I'm on the table? And I flat line or something
• 13:00
  like that, it would be the docks point out the paddles and give
• 13:03
  me a little shocked and coming back, like, easy on those shows
• 13:08
  and the line showing up on the monitor with the heart beats so
• 13:12
  things like to hide. We're helpful couple other
• 13:15
  things that come to mind. We almost some housekeeping
• 13:19
  items. We assign a comms person.
• 13:22
  So we talked about before, you know, how are we going to keep
• 13:24
  the family and friends? Updated and in a way that's not
• 13:28
  going to be inundating us and something where we're not going
• 13:31
  to have to sit on our phones and spend all day updating with my
• 13:37
  progress and also not in a dating myself when I should be
• 13:40
  focusing on getting better. So it was something that you
• 13:45
  took on and you did an interesting way where you
• 13:48
  created a Google doc where you could almost journal and create
• 13:52
  a daily update in terms of how things were progressing for me.
• 13:56
  Me, which people could look and see how things were going
• 14:00
  without having to bother us in inconvenient times.
• 14:04
  Also, a big one for me, which you'll have, but I shaved off my
• 14:08
  beard first time seeing it without a.
• 14:12
  Yeah, I grew my beard in 2011. I met Andre and 2013.
• 14:18
  She had never seen me without a beard, okay?
• 14:20
  I actually didn't know that. You had only had the beard for a
• 14:22
  couple of years. At that point, I thought you
• 14:24
  were just born with it. It was the only way that I could
• 14:27
  look older than 19 fake became part of my identity.
• 14:31
  So it is definitely a big change and that was a small thing that
• 14:36
  we could do. Judges feel like we had some
• 14:39
  control of the situation and we're doing everything that we
• 14:41
  could to support. And while a small thing things
• 14:45
  like bacteria can grab onto hairs and so to remove that was
• 14:51
  something that we could do. Even though most of this process
• 14:54
  was out of our control, went to the barber every opportunity.
• 14:58
  I could before surgery is to get a fresh cut to feel good going
• 15:03
  in. He would take down my beard,
• 15:05
  which is a very uncomfortable look and I was very excited to
• 15:09
  get back. Was it the first time that I
• 15:11
  came? Yeah, I mean, we're just talking
• 15:13
  about a beard but there was so much symbolism in that I
• 15:17
  remember coming with you and I remember feeling nervous and
• 15:19
  then Carlos your Barber, like, spins around of the chair to
• 15:23
  feel like, oh, When I don't know, you just, yeah, he looks
• 15:29
  like a totally different person. It was almost like foreshadowing
• 15:32
  for like this person that you'd have to become over this period
• 15:35
  of a time. Like he kind of had to channel
• 15:37
  this different self to get through what you end up getting
• 15:40
  through. Yeah, and then the last thing
• 15:43
  that comes to mind in terms of how I prepared for the surgeries
• 15:46
  was, my dear andreea letters that we've never really talked
• 15:50
  about what other people, but it was definitely a heavy process
• 15:54
  for me. It got But certainly easier as
• 15:58
  surgeries went on, but the first one was definitely tough.
• 16:01
  And what they were is, I decided that I wanted to provide you,
• 16:06
  with some level of comfort during that time because I knew
• 16:10
  that during the surgery. It was actually harder for you
• 16:15
  than what we for me. If you think about it, I had the
• 16:18
  easy job or I was just laying on a table asleep and the surgeons
• 16:23
  were hard at work, whereas you had to Supply and wait, and wait
• 16:28
  for the call from the surgeon. So, I decided to write you an
• 16:32
  email that I would schedule and God and stop tearing up and it's
• 16:37
  going to make me tear up. I would schedule this end and I
• 16:41
  would talk about my perspective during that surgery and try and
• 16:46
  get you. I can positively and happy as if
• 16:49
  I was awake during that time. And here's what's happening and
• 16:52
  the surgeons are busy at work doing their thing.
• 16:56
  Yeah, and I'm going to look like Captain America when he came out
• 17:00
  of the Pod after the surgery. So really trying to put a smile
• 17:04
  on your face and it was a tough thing to write.
• 17:07
  Because, you know, at the time I'm writing and know where I
• 17:10
  didn't necessarily know the outcome, but like I said, as
• 17:14
  surgeries went on, it certainly became an easier thing to write
• 17:18
  and get some positivity across to you during that time.
• 17:22
  I wasn't sure if I was going to cry, but here we are four
• 17:25
  minutes. Or whatever we're at, they were
• 17:28
  like the most special things I've ever received.
• 17:32
  For sure had me ugly crying at the same time as laughing with a
• 17:36
  little inside jokes that you peppered in and jokes about some
• 17:40
  of the funny quirky doctors that we had but they'd be up to in
• 17:43
  the or this pretty unbelievable. Thanks Google for the schedule
• 17:47
  sent ability. It's really trippy.
• 17:50
  Yeah, that cool. Then everything went out the
• 17:52
  window with subsequent surgeries.
• 17:54
  Yeah, we made it through through that point and got through these
• 17:58
  surgeries, you were walking this Stanley Park.
• 18:01
  So you all weeks later and just crushing it, you were mountain
• 18:07
  biking months later. So I guess if we were to kind of
• 18:10
  just give a bit of a time frame, three surgeries happen between
• 18:13
  September and December of that year by 1920, 19, 20, 20,
• 18:17
  pandemic hits were smug. We're like, oh, thank God.
• 18:21
  Those surgeries happened in 2019.
• 18:22
  Imagine them happening now and jokes on us.
• 18:26
  Joke's on you, then had a great summer in your mountain biking
• 18:31
  and we were actually hunkered down and kind of enjoying our
• 18:34
  time, just two of us and all of our neighbors were joking about
• 18:37
  what's it like to be in a pandemic without kids and yada
• 18:40
  yada. We got pregnant because we were
• 18:43
  like, we're through the shit and it started to kind of crumble.
• 18:48
  What happened? Yeah, the pandemic made rehab.
• 18:52
  It interesting, for sure, but things headed the right
• 18:55
  direction. It meant that I couldn't
• 18:57
  necessarily go and see paramedical services and get
• 19:02
  Physio and things that I needed given.
• 19:04
  I really got through those surgeries and was in a state
• 19:08
  where I could get those services around February and then,
• 19:11
  depending make it a grand jury mentioned, was mountain biking,
• 19:14
  doing all those things and we were ready to start a family.
• 19:18
  We had put that on hold during those surgeries and things were
• 19:23
  looking positive and going the right way and so I decided to
• 19:26
  start trying, speaking of biking, it was back-to-back
• 19:30
  weekends, where we decided to go for a bike ride.
• 19:33
  We went on this same Trail and the first weekend was great and
• 19:37
  we're having such a good time and the second weekend you were
• 19:40
  just dogging at you're so slow. I thought it was going so fast.
• 19:45
  What is wrong with? You are just huffing and puffing
• 19:48
  and then you thought it was because I was Ryan on a
• 19:51
  different bike and I was going faster and turned out.
• 19:55
  I was the weekend that we found. Found out we were pregnant soon
• 19:58
  as great things were falling into place.
• 20:00
  We overcome those surgeries the hardships that we had dealt
• 20:03
  with. We were starting our family and
• 20:06
  looking forward to what was coming in the future, fast
• 20:09
  forward to, this is September of 2020 and I remember it.
• 20:13
  So clearly I hopped on my mountain bike and was going to
• 20:17
  go for a ride and I was Ryan up pretty small incline behind her
• 20:21
  house and I don't know where my legs just completely.
• 20:26
  Seized up on me and it was something that I never felt
• 20:29
  before, it felt like I had just done a thousand squats out of
• 20:33
  nowhere. I stopped and I could barely get
• 20:37
  off my bike. I couldn't even swing my leg
• 20:39
  over. My see, it was such a weird day.
• 20:42
  I remember. So clearly sitting on the side
• 20:44
  trying to stretch out my legs and understand what is going on.
• 20:48
  Meanwhile, I see these two teenagers riding their bikes
• 20:53
  hands-free with their slushies, having just a great time.
• 20:57
  I guess just before school and started that year and where's
• 21:01
  the girl lose the control of her bike hits the curb and goes
• 21:05
  flying into the bush. She was completely fine, but
• 21:07
  obviously super embarrassed slushy everywhere and the boy
• 21:12
  turning to look at what happened, he also crashes, his
• 21:15
  by quizzes smoothie, all over the concrete and I was just
• 21:18
  thinking like what is going on right now.
• 21:21
  So you're on the curb, these two kids are on the ground, slushies
• 21:25
  everywhere. Did you guys give each other
• 21:27
  like a knowing nod? Like no, they just screw it away
• 21:30
  there. So embarrassed, I was going on
• 21:33
  slushy, all over them but I just decided it was a bit of an omen
• 21:36
  to call it a day here. Dark on my bike ride.
• 21:39
  So I went home and things are starting to deteriorate.
• 21:42
  I got a fever, I didn't actually throw up but kind of that urgent
• 21:48
  sort of dry heaving. So we spent the night on a merge
• 21:50
  and they eventually came to the conclusion that I had some sort
• 21:53
  of virus at the time, which which we thought was incredibly
• 21:57
  weird given pandemic. We were super lock down on our
• 22:01
  and we didn't want to risk catching anything that would
• 22:05
  harm the work that we had done and everything.
• 22:08
  Do we gone through and we don't want to go backwards.
• 22:10
  So it seemed a little weird that they were saying.
• 22:13
  You must have some sort of virus, so we continued to go
• 22:16
  through our due diligence. This is, you know, weeks and
• 22:20
  turning into months. But following up with my
• 22:23
  cardiologist, making sure everything was good at the time.
• 22:26
  They also said yeah it's probably just some weird virus
• 22:29
  your legs. We understand that there are
• 22:31
  still not 100% after that episode but you know I'm sure
• 22:35
  they'll get better over time. But why don't we just do an MRI
• 22:39
  just to be sure that Mr. I took you know another waiting period
• 22:42
  And so a couple months later do they MRI and quickly get a
• 22:47
  callback for emergency CAT scan, CT, scan, and it revealed that
• 22:53
  there was a clot in the repair that they had done to my aorta,
• 22:58
  all those months prior and I was shortly after that and made it
• 23:02
  to the hospital and shortly after that went in for
• 23:06
  subsequent surgeries, tell the story of the MRI that morning.
• 23:11
  I mean I actually tried to track down the technician because I
• 23:14
  owe him a lot of. Thanks and appreciation.
• 23:17
  I slept in, I didn't set a proper calendar notification
• 23:22
  which is very unlike you to not be organized.
• 23:26
  Prepared for something like that.
• 23:27
  I'm not being funny. Like, he's like, one of the most
• 23:29
  organized dialed people, I know. So I get this call.
• 23:33
  I'm still in bed and it's the MRI technician.
• 23:36
  Saying, hi, you were actually supposed to be in an MRI machine
• 23:40
  right now. Are you on your way?
• 23:43
  What's going on? And I was shocked that I had
• 23:46
  completely missed that and felt terrible and said, I'm so
• 23:50
  apologetic. I'm so sorry for missing this
• 23:53
  said, you know what? I think I can fit you in a
• 23:55
  little later. Or which I'm sure wasn't an easy
• 23:57
  task, because it was like a two-hour session.
• 24:00
  He said, come by the hospital to st.
• 24:03
  Paul's downtown will try and fit you in.
• 24:05
  So, I Rush downtown waited for a couple hours, then.
• 24:09
  He was able to squeeze me in, get me in for that MRI, which is
• 24:13
  ultimately the test that revealed, this quote, that have
• 24:17
  formed in my aorta. So, without him out of the
• 24:20
  goodness of his heart, making time for me to come in that day,
• 24:24
  we really could have been in Much worse off position that we
• 24:28
  ended up being will find a Monday.
• 24:30
  Will tell them the story will send in this episode.
• 24:32
  Yeah, go dedicate this episode to hatcheries listener.
• 24:37
  That's a legend. He's like, wait, that was me.
• 24:40
  My gosh. If it's you please send me a
• 24:42
  note. We'd love to see them.
• 24:44
  Give you a kiss, a fruit basket, a million dollars something.
• 24:49
  Oh my goodness. Okay.
• 24:50
  So this is the end of 2020 December.
• 24:56
  And you have to go in for a really, really big scary surgery
• 25:01
  that how do we even put it? They were basically making it
• 25:05
  up. Yeah, for context of a surgery
• 25:07
  that never been done before and it was my aorta, which is what
• 25:12
  God repaired when I was six months old because of the time
• 25:15
  it was too narrow so they had wind it and just over the course
• 25:19
  of me growing up and blood flowing through that area.
• 25:22
  It it enlarged which often happens to that Area post
• 25:27
  surgery and it was an aneurysm, so it had gotten quite large to
• 25:32
  the point where there was concern over a rupture.
• 25:34
  So that was what all those surgeries were Four and Twenty
• 25:37
  nineteen was to repair that area and they put in a graft, which
• 25:41
  is artificial. It was actually, we always
• 25:44
  laughed about it is material. I think called Dacron, which is
• 25:48
  essentially like Gore-Tex that they had put in to replace that
• 25:51
  area in my aorta. So anything that is artificial
• 25:56
  All in your body doesn't tend to agree well with infections.
• 26:01
  So I had formed that quad and at the time it was a bit perplexing
• 26:05
  to the doctors because I'm on all these blood thinners and
• 26:08
  things that you prevent me from having any sort of quat, so they
• 26:12
  can understand why this had formed.
• 26:14
  It took some time to properly, diagnose.
• 26:17
  I was thankful to my surgeon who is just a dog on a bone, in
• 26:21
  terms of trying to fully understand what was going on.
• 26:25
  They finally did a biopsy. See which revealed it was a
• 26:28
  fungal infection that had grown in that area.
• 26:31
  They really didn't know where it come from, it was kind of a
• 26:34
  one-in-a-million situation. Could have been something from
• 26:37
  the previous surgeries and infection and got in at the
• 26:40
  time, we don't really know so they had to replace that area.
• 26:45
  But it wasn't as simple as just taking out the piece of Dacron
• 26:49
  and replacing it with a new one, they had to fully redo that
• 26:52
  surgery, but they couldn't put another piece of artificial.
• 26:56
  Ariel. And so they instead had to build
• 26:59
  that portion of my aorta using veins or whatever magic that
• 27:04
  they do from my thighs. So it ended up being all up
• 27:10
  about a 16 hour surgery. It was not a fun rehab and it
• 27:16
  certainly took a lot out of me but it was a big hurdle and big
• 27:19
  thing to go through after we had just been through the three
• 27:24
  surgeries and we felt like that was all before.
• 27:26
  Behind us. So as much as it was a physical
• 27:28
  hurdle, it was certainly a mental hurdle for us and we were
• 27:32
  pregnant at the time so it was the time where I was excited to
• 27:37
  be focused on you. My wife who was pregnant after
• 27:43
  you being that rock through all my surgeries and taking on so
• 27:47
  much of that load and caring for me, I was excited to be able to
• 27:53
  give that back to you which didn't end up being the case.
• 27:56
  It was you were seven eight months pregnant and having to
• 27:59
  visit me in a hospital bed. Then it's just we could always
• 28:03
  talk about like the expectation versus reality.
• 28:05
  Like we just had these expectations and it says, if we
• 28:08
  thought like Universe owed us, something it's not how we
• 28:11
  actually, like go about life and by any means, but we were like,
• 28:14
  okay, scary stuff is done. Now, it's time to make a baby.
• 28:17
  This is going to be a magical experience, butterflies and
• 28:20
  rainbows and whatever and then boom.
• 28:22
  You know, you're spending this incredible amount of time to
• 28:26
  Solid months in the hospital that first month, you kind of
• 28:29
  glossed over it. But I think back on that time
• 28:31
  that one month as probably one of the worst months of my life,
• 28:34
  I imagine yours like there was so much not knowing there was so
• 28:39
  much stuff that happened in that time to with your liver.
• 28:42
  And there was like, literally, every type of doctor that you
• 28:45
  never even knew existed was visiting, you on the regular and
• 28:48
  remember this one nurse, she didn't realize the impact of her
• 28:50
  words, I don't think, but she was like, man, every time I come
• 28:53
  on to my shift, it's something new with you.
• 28:55
  I don't know. The intention of it like she was
• 28:57
  probably like joking or whatever, but it was like that's
• 29:00
  how it feels and thinks for like, pointing that out.
• 29:03
  Yeah. When I don't know what their
• 29:05
  position, those social workers /.
• 29:07
  Pastor spiritual person? Yeah, comes to visit you and
• 29:12
  frequently check in on you, you know, at that point should seen
• 29:16
  the fan and they're talking about and trying to figure out
• 29:19
  how to do surgeries. They've never been done before.
• 29:21
  That's when she gets real scary because having a A wife and a
• 29:27
  child on the way that you want to meet and see grow up.
• 29:33
  It was a heavy time for sure. If you are to do it all over
• 29:36
  knowing what you know. Now would you wave a magic wand
• 29:39
  and change anything in terms of us being pregnant?
• 29:43
  Yeah, that's a good one change. The timing of it.
• 29:45
  Would you change the timing of all that?
• 29:47
  Do you think that we should have waited a five-year buffer before
• 29:49
  we started having kids to make sure everything was okay?
• 29:51
  Or what do you think? I guess I would preface this by
• 29:54
  saying, I wouldn't ask This early Advocate if you're going
• 29:58
  in for a major surgery but that would be a good time to try
• 30:02
  having a baby. Probably not what you want to be
• 30:07
  doing. That's sad I certainly wouldn't
• 30:10
  change anything. Obviously it was a huge extra
• 30:13
  load on. You not only were you carrying
• 30:15
  for me but then once we had a d, you were also managing both a
• 30:21
  newborn and me still going through my health Journey but it
• 30:26
  Just ended up being such to quote, my mother-in-law a
• 30:29
  blessing. It was a time that having her
• 30:33
  around just allowed us to focus on something other than the
• 30:39
  depressing Health crap, that we were going through, it allowed
• 30:43
  us to just get excited about our daughter and everything.
• 30:48
  You know, obviously is a new parent.
• 30:50
  Every little thing is just so magical and so fun that it just
• 30:55
  oh wow. Add me to have just incredible
• 30:58
  destruction. So yeah, I definitely wouldn't
• 31:00
  change it. I wouldn't change the timing or
• 31:05
  anything but yes I wouldn't Advocate try that Big takeaway
• 31:10
  here is not to make a baby If You're Going Through Hell stuff.
• 31:14
  Got it. Yeah.
• 31:15
  So that one surgery, I went back for ended up being there was a
• 31:19
  subsequent surgery, so that clot they repaired it.
• 31:24
  I was ready to go home. They just want to do a CT scan
• 31:27
  to clear to make sure everything was good.
• 31:30
  It revealed that the clotted actually moved lower down and my
• 31:34
  aorta and was now in my abdomen, whether it's left off during the
• 31:39
  biopsy or surgery or what. So that meant another large
• 31:43
  surgery that they were concerned about.
• 31:45
  That was quite the time. Thankfully though, we got out
• 31:48
  nine days before he was born. So was able to be there, I lost
• 31:55
  probably over. 30 pounds which for people that don't know me.
• 31:59
  I don't have that amount of weight to lose.
• 32:02
  I'm like 150 soaking wet, right? Or walking around andreea,
• 32:06
  definitely way more than me her pregnancy and I continue to tell
• 32:11
  you. But yeah, we got out at that
• 32:14
  point, nine days before he was born.
• 32:16
  So I got to be there for that stick then, but got to win this,
• 32:19
  that I guess I was just thinking about.
• 32:21
  We haven't actually talked about the people that we met on our
• 32:24
  journey and that could be its own.
• 32:26
  Episode for sure but not that we wanted to forge such meaningful
• 32:30
  relationships. But when you're in that
• 32:31
  situation so many times, with the same cast of characters of
• 32:34
  nurses, ICU, nurses, doctors surgeons Specialists.
• 32:38
  We did, I think it's worth mentioning that we had an
• 32:41
  incredible team surrounding us. And I say us because you know,
• 32:46
  maybe half that time, you were asleep and I was just sitting
• 32:48
  there it's cracked up he had there were some funny things
• 32:52
  that you said was pretty incredible to form those
• 32:55
  meaningful. Actions and get to know the
• 32:56
  people behind the face masks and Shields and all that, who cared
• 33:01
  so deeply, who were calling, you know, we would joke about her
• 33:04
  surgery ends in some, of the quirky behavior is.
• 33:06
  However, these people are getting on the line with like
• 33:09
  they're University buddies, who now work out of Texas, and
• 33:13
  they're collaborating with them. And spending time for sure off
• 33:16
  the clock, trying to figure out what's going on, sending samples
• 33:19
  getting grants from the government, or four, or whatever
• 33:21
  it was like, they were having to get, like, special permission
• 33:23
  from the government to be sending infections.
• 33:25
  Balls down to Ohio like it was just crazy stuff was happening
• 33:30
  in the background and I'm sure there's so much more stuff that
• 33:32
  we don't even know about that they were doing on our behalf
• 33:34
  and just being an ear Patty. Shout out to you.
• 33:37
  You know, we love you totally so much.
• 33:39
  She was the nurse practitioner on the cardiac surgery floor,
• 33:43
  who we got to know very, very well and she is a true Angel but
• 33:48
  I don't say that lightly. She was just sitting there
• 33:51
  listening to us. She'd say, do you have any
• 33:52
  questions? I don't think we would often ask
• 33:54
  her questions. We would just be crying.
• 33:55
  Hi to her, and she would just sit and listen when often she
• 33:59
  would be that conduit for us as well, because like you
• 34:02
  mentioned, surgeons are quirky Bunch.
• 34:05
  They are incredibly good at their jobs case in point me, but
• 34:09
  they aren't always the best communicators.
• 34:11
  And Patty was somebody where she knew that we often had a million
• 34:16
  questions and wouldn't necessarily know how to make
• 34:20
  sure that we got enough of the surgeons time or translated
• 34:24
  everything in the right way. And she was The do that.
• 34:26
  So for all the things but that was one thing that was so
• 34:29
  helpful that she made sure that she was able to be that bridge
• 34:33
  to hold up. The surgeon to ask more
• 34:36
  questions of them or be able to translate what they had said
• 34:40
  which we appreciate very much given when I was the only person
• 34:43
  allowed in the hospital to visit you and we couldn't have our own
• 34:46
  Mother's like we couldn't have your mom.
• 34:48
  We couldn't have my mom in their height of covid.
• 34:50
  Patty was like our mom who was mom's kind of get in there.
• 34:55
  And they, like they really stick with you and help you get the
• 34:58
  answers that you need. Okay, so we have a baby and I
• 35:03
  should ask about that. This is a parenting podcast.
• 35:05
  What was it like to go through a blood?
• 35:08
  And to be now off, work on medical leave.
• 35:10
  And to have this new little human, I know you said it was
• 35:13
  great. Something to focus on someone
• 35:15
  else to focus on. Get us out of this weird cycle
• 35:18
  that we were in. What was the journey into
• 35:20
  Parenthood? Like for you?
• 35:21
  Yeah, obviously we had all this additional stuff going on with
• 35:25
  the house. Journey, which unfortunately
• 35:27
  didn't and when Daddy was born, there was three subsequent
• 35:30
  surgeries. So for anybody, who's keeping
• 35:32
  track, that was eight surgeries and a year and a half over 100
• 35:36
  days in the hospital. At this point in time, we're at
• 35:37
  five. Yeah, we're probably at 5:05
• 35:40
  that point. I mean, if we count the
• 35:42
  surgeries when I was before a live in were at ate already.
• 35:46
  So, yeah, it was definitely a different journey into
• 35:49
  Parenthood, you know, walking down the Halls, when you're
• 35:51
  seven eight months pregnant to come visit me.
• 35:54
  It was I Think about once between my own rehab, journey
• 35:59
  and parenting. And I think the one thing that
• 36:04
  we were really grateful of as crappy as that situation, was
• 36:08
  that at that point, I ended up wasn't clear to go back to work
• 36:12
  for about 10 months. And so it meant that we were
• 36:15
  both together during that time because you are on mat leave.
• 36:20
  I was on medical leave and it was the two of us being able to
• 36:25
  navigate. Parenthood journey together
• 36:28
  through it. All it wasn't either, I'm going
• 36:31
  back to work or you're going back to work.
• 36:33
  And one of us with the child, it allowed us to fully take team
• 36:37
  everything, which was cool to be able to be around for all the
• 36:40
  experiences and as well. Just being able to collaborate
• 36:45
  on everything and problem solve, everything that comes up
• 36:48
  together which you do a lot as a new parent.
• 36:51
  So it was great during my rehab like I said to be able to focus
• 36:55
  on On a Diaz. Something to take my mind away
• 36:58
  from things and also just grateful that we were almost as
• 37:02
  consolation for that Journey we went through, we were able to
• 37:07
  spend that extra time together as a family so I loved it.
• 37:12
  So unique to give it was covid. We had so much help that could
• 37:17
  have been available. Like we have incredible
• 37:19
  families, incredible friends, who also another shout-out would
• 37:23
  be like the support that we got from our friends and family
• 37:25
  through it. With the messages in the field
• 37:27
  and that just unbelievable. Kindness.
• 37:30
  That continued to when we had a baby but you can only do so much
• 37:33
  in a pandemic. Like I think there's probably a
• 37:34
  lot of pandemic parents listening who think back and
• 37:38
  maybe there's a bit of, maybe a bit of trauma around that or a
• 37:40
  bit of just, whoa, that was a hard time because we had to do
• 37:44
  it all on her own. I think for us, it actually
• 37:46
  allowed us this space and I'm thinking of, like meditation,
• 37:50
  when you kind of just are able to go quiet and just reset.
• 37:53
  You were healing, we were all here.
• 37:55
  Feeling emotionally from unbelievable experience.
• 37:59
  I had a C-section. I guess I was recovering from a
• 38:02
  surgery. Myself, we were just like
• 38:03
  surgery, family, and Addie was just the cutest.
• 38:06
  Smallest, little sweetie who we were able to pour our love and
• 38:10
  energy into, which was pretty fun.
• 38:12
  So much light and dark. I feel like we talked about that
• 38:14
  a lot over the last couple of years about how awful things can
• 38:18
  be. But how I think we got through,
• 38:20
  I don't know. I think I got through by always
• 38:21
  seeing like what was the light of that and like you just
• 38:25
  articulated I did that. So well water cool experience to
• 38:28
  get to raise our daughter and that first year completely
• 38:32
  together as a little unit, it's pretty fun.
• 38:35
  Okay. So I think we'd be remiss if we
• 38:37
  didn't close out the story with the what happened next?
• 38:41
  And we've got a whole to shave every March, April, 1 week old,
• 38:45
  and things are too kind of go a bit awry.
• 38:48
  Tell us what happened next. Yeah, it went awry.
• 38:55
  This This kind of Journey that were on Now is all just various
• 38:59
  complications as a result of some of these major surgeries
• 39:03
  and they're things that you wouldn't even think would
• 39:06
  necessarily be a complication. When you're going in for a
• 39:09
  cardiac surgery on your heart, you think of complications about
• 39:13
  things not working out from our perspective?
• 39:16
  You don't think of things where where they're operating is
• 39:19
  around your vocal nerve and sometimes that can get nicked.
• 39:23
  During that process sometimes, See you lose your voice,
• 39:26
  sometimes you lose your voice, that was actually something that
• 39:30
  happened coming through my first set of three surgeries back in
• 39:33
  2019 and I came out with one of my vocal cords paralyzed and it
• 39:38
  took some time for it to come back and thankfully it did and
• 39:42
  it was a period we're talking wasn't the easiest I had low
• 39:47
  voice I'm saying that it with voice that's all turn out as
• 39:51
  well. But so coming out of these
• 39:53
  surgery is now We've got our daughter gone through those
• 39:57
  major ones and these other complications are popping up.
• 40:01
  We were going for walks at with our daughter and you know as
• 40:05
  part of her nap time and me rehabbing and I was just having
• 40:10
  a tough time breathing and it wasn't until I had had a
• 40:14
  subsequent follow-up with my ENT or nose throat stock where they
• 40:20
  had realized that during these last surgeries both my vocal
• 40:25
  cords. Had become paralyzed in a fixed
• 40:28
  position. Basically closed, essentially
• 40:31
  closed. So talking was all right,
• 40:35
  swallowing was all right, but breathing not so easy and it
• 40:42
  just seemed to be progressing and getting worse.
• 40:45
  And so, as I tried to rehab and stuff, it was actually getting
• 40:49
  harder and harder to breathe. So, they initially performed a
• 40:53
  surgery where they literally put in a balloon.
• 40:55
  And they blow up the balloon to just just wide in that area that
• 40:59
  unfortunately didn't work. It didn't do a single thing,
• 41:02
  didn't do a single thing. So weeks later, it was quite
• 41:05
  terrible to the point where I could hardly move Addie would be
• 41:10
  upset on the floor and Andre was away, she'd be upstairs or one
• 41:14
  night and I felt like, I couldn't even generate the
• 41:17
  strength to be able to go and comfort her just because I just
• 41:21
  literally was being strangled by my own throat.
• 41:25
  So at that point, there was other steps that could be taken
• 41:29
  the ear nose and throat surgeon said at this point, the only
• 41:34
  thing that she could see that would properly fix things.
• 41:38
  I guess it hasn't been to fold, but the main thing was putting
• 41:41
  in a tracheostomy for those who are familiar with it, it's
• 41:46
  essentially a tube that gets inserted directly into your
• 41:49
  throat, which remains in your throat and allows you to Breathe
• 41:54
  In and Out directly. Only through your throat by
• 41:57
  passing your mouth at that time. They also did a procedure called
• 42:02
  a chordata me where they shaved off a portion of my vocal cords
• 42:06
  to try and just in large, open up that space to give me more
• 42:10
  room to breathe. They obviously, don't want to
• 42:12
  mess around with that too much, because if they enlarge it too
• 42:15
  much, then when may not close enough when you're swallowing,
• 42:18
  which could lead to you swallowing water and going
• 42:21
  directly into your lungs. And I mean, the risk that they
• 42:24
  were talking about going into that.
• 42:25
  Was your voice will be altered forever and oh yeah, your voice
• 42:30
  will probably be a whisper for the rest of your life which was
• 42:33
  real icing on the cake. Yeah.
• 42:35
  That one you talked about through all the surgeries what
• 42:39
  was the point where you hit rock bottom?
• 42:40
  I definitely think it was when they handed me that brochure
• 42:44
  that said how to live with your tracheostomy that point just
• 42:48
  absolutely sucked. At that point, they were
• 42:51
  managing my expectations and telling me that this was a
• 42:54
  situation that I was going to have to Live with, for the rest
• 42:56
  of my life. I was going to have a
• 42:58
  tracheostomy, my vocal cords through the surgeries and
• 43:03
  impact, and the chordata me was going to be impacted to a point
• 43:06
  where I wasn't going to have much of a voice.
• 43:09
  Obviously, what you're hearing through the mic.
• 43:10
  Now, this isn't my natural pre-surgery voice.
• 43:13
  It's obviously been altered as a result of those surgeries.
• 43:17
  Thankfully, it projects pretty well.
• 43:19
  I don't need aren't good. I don't do well in loud
• 43:22
  situations. So noisy restaurant stuff like
• 43:24
  that. I get Ground out pretty quickly.
• 43:27
  But ultimately, you know, it is functioning the trach though,
• 43:31
  that was shit. It's again, one of those
• 43:34
  complications that you don't think would happen going for
• 43:36
  your heart surgery. All of a sudden you're breathing
• 43:38
  through tube in your throat. It's something that required
• 43:42
  constant maintenance, changing it, it's completely changed
• 43:47
  things. In terms of going about daily
• 43:49
  life, I can properly have a shower because you can't get a
• 43:53
  wet and you can't have water going.
• 43:55
  In there because it's a direct line into your lungs which meant
• 44:00
  I could no longer swim for us every vacation that we go on
• 44:04
  everything that we do revolves around water that wasn't an easy
• 44:07
  pill to swallow and knowing that there was a good chance that I
• 44:10
  was going to have that for my life was definitely a tough pill
• 44:13
  to swallow a few times. I think I saw you cry, I don't
• 44:16
  know how there was only a few handful but during all this
• 44:20
  stuff the second the surgeon very roughly four ladies.
• 44:25
  Information that no, you will never swim again in your life go
• 44:28
  underwater. I'll never forget the look on
• 44:30
  your face. Like that was unbelievable and
• 44:33
  we expressed wow that's really hard to hear.
• 44:35
  And I think what her response we didn't have a great relationship
• 44:38
  with a surgeon. Let's just say that her response
• 44:41
  was like well at least you're not a fisherman.
• 44:42
  Like the last guy I worked with and we're like that doesn't make
• 44:45
  us feel better. And now we just feel really bad
• 44:47
  for the fishermen. So thanks not gonna call her
• 44:50
  out. Yeah.
• 44:51
  I mean like we've said we had amazing Health practitioners.
• 44:55
  She was the one Lip. Yeah, there was a couple in
• 44:57
  there. There's mod nurses but other
• 44:59
  than that. Yeah, we were very fortunate to
• 45:02
  have such a great crew working with us but yeah, not that one.
• 45:05
  No, not that one. Okay, I want to ask you for.
• 45:08
  There's a couple funny stories that came up in all this and
• 45:12
  then of course before we end, I want to hear how obviously
• 45:15
  you're going to tell the story of how you are today and how
• 45:19
  things are looking. But there's one story with the
• 45:21
  trach, the trach was not a fun experience but there was one
• 45:25
  experience And so you had that we still laugh about stay share
• 45:28
  that story. Yeah.
• 45:30
  So starting to return to work. It was like, I had mentioned
• 45:34
  after 10 months of being off work and it was a slow
• 45:38
  progression, it was didn't want to rush it with my vocal cords.
• 45:42
  They weren't at the range that they're at today and breathing
• 45:47
  through a drake isn't easy because it's a direct line
• 45:50
  through your lungs. You don't have the filtration
• 45:53
  that you have through your mouth and Throat.
• 45:56
  So are that is Dusty and stuff. That's going straight down your
• 46:00
  lungs. Air that is dry isn't great.
• 46:04
  So it's nice to be moist and all those things can be very
• 46:08
  irritating, so I haven't been talking a lot but now I'm
• 46:13
  getting into a work setting where I'm starting to talk to
• 46:15
  people and I've got what's called a speaking valve, which
• 46:19
  is a little plastic knob that goes on the end of the trach
• 46:23
  that allows you to inhale through The tracheostomy.
• 46:26
  But exhale, the valve closes and it pushes air through your vocal
• 46:31
  cords, which allows you to talk and make noise.
• 46:33
  And so, I had this, stick it on the end of my trach and I was on
• 46:37
  a video call and meeting somebody for the first time and
• 46:40
  was chatting to her. And inevitably things were gain
• 46:44
  irritated with in my throat and I had to cough.
• 46:46
  And so I turned to cough, I put myself on mute so it wasn't
• 46:51
  going to cough in her ears and a cough and I cough so hard.
• 46:55
  And it was like a spit ball through the straw or whatever.
• 46:58
  But basically there was enough force that my speaking valve
• 47:02
  shot across the room, it just flew across which the person I
• 47:08
  was speaking. Do didn't know where understand
• 47:10
  what was going on. So here I am scrambling to find
• 47:13
  the speaking valve around the room to stick it back on so that
• 47:18
  I can return to the call and try and not be super-awkward on it.
• 47:24
  That was your way to speak. Like, without that you had to
• 47:27
  let's call it. A collude the words that we know
• 47:29
  now is just makes it sound so fancy but he'd have to cover the
• 47:32
  trach on the exhale in order to speak and make sound speaking.
• 47:38
  Valve was vital. Oh my gosh.
• 47:39
  Okay, I don't even know if we have time for like there's so
• 47:41
  many other stories that include you know.
• 47:43
  Funny roommates, sweet sweet nurses and roommates that you
• 47:48
  had and sandwiches and all that maybe will say that for a
• 47:51
  funnies episode. But so that this doesn't become
• 47:53
  a three-hour episode. How How are you today and how
• 47:57
  did everything unfold? I think people probably can
• 48:01
  guess that you don't have a tracheostomy anymore.
• 48:03
  So what happened? Yeah, that was definitely
• 48:07
  amazing moment where after being told that I was going to have
• 48:10
  the tracheostomy for the rest of my life at the same time, the
• 48:15
  vocal cords have this interesting way of healing over
• 48:19
  a long period and up to a year, you can see Improvement the
• 48:23
  Nerf, right? The nerve yeah and everything
• 48:27
  and obviously we were doing with all kinds of swelling and
• 48:31
  inflammation and stuff as well so it was almost pretty well a
• 48:34
  year to the surgeries and I was kind of a woken in my sleep and
• 48:40
  really felt just my Airway opening up and we were very
• 48:45
  cautiously optimistic and took some frequent check-ins with the
• 48:49
  ENT who was a different ENT at that point and managed to be
• 48:55
  able to Remove the tracheostomy after having it for about a year
• 48:58
  which was an incredible experience that along with
• 49:03
  rehabbing my body and other ways and there's obviously still a
• 49:07
  long way for me to go in terms of getting back to Baseline.
• 49:10
  But I'm making big strides as far as regaining the body that I
• 49:15
  had and building myself back up. So yeah from a health
• 49:18
  perspective things are good I haven't been for a surgery in.
• 49:25
  Yeah. Since June of twenty, twenty
• 49:27
  one. So that's been a nice experience
• 49:31
  on a nice change, things are gone.
• 49:32
  Well, I don't think you told me right away when your Airway kind
• 49:36
  of opened up miraculously, and I think you forgot one piece, was
• 49:40
  that we were on some exceptionally expensive.
• 49:43
  We won't say the price, but the drugs that you were on to get
• 49:46
  rid of the fungal infection. Where, astronomically expensive.
• 49:51
  Where was in the prize? I don't know.
• 49:53
  You can say it is 5 grand a month.
• 49:55
  Month, the meds. I was on thankfully, we had
• 49:58
  really good through your workplace at the time, really
• 50:01
  good coverage. So we paid a small fraction of
• 50:04
  that, thankfully, but it was quite an investment to get me
• 50:09
  where I am today and then it was like, your Airway opened up your
• 50:13
  off, the antifungals, and then talk to me about your recovery
• 50:17
  Journey from there. So like you're recovering in and
• 50:19
  out of all these different surgeries and all that sort of
• 50:21
  thing, you hit that Rock Bottom. How did you find the motivation
• 50:24
  and what did you do? To come back from that versus
• 50:28
  the people who are like I deserve to just sit on the couch
• 50:30
  and just be an asshole. You mean, I'm not on our winter
• 50:36
  happen overnight. It was certainly, after being
• 50:38
  through everything that we had went through and where every
• 50:41
  little thing that came up ended up being the old thing of like,
• 50:45
  don't make a mountain out of a molehill.
• 50:47
  Literally everything that we came across ended up being a
• 50:49
  mountain, so there was a lot to get through and it definitely
• 50:53
  took its toll on me both physically like we Talked about,
• 50:55
  but also mentally it wasn't easy.
• 50:59
  I had a tough time with relationships outside of my
• 51:02
  immediate family, in terms of. How do I talk about things and
• 51:06
  just articulate what I went through without having to live
• 51:09
  through everything and there's quite a few even really close
• 51:13
  friends of mine that I still, haven't explained to this detail
• 51:16
  in terms of what I went through and so, it took some time, but I
• 51:20
  think when things started turning, is when I finally
• 51:23
  started being able to be physically, Active again for me,
• 51:27
  that's always been something that has been pretty critical
• 51:30
  for my mental. Health is staying active and
• 51:33
  being healthy and being able to do that.
• 51:36
  And it was kind of those Perfect Storm where I was clear to start
• 51:39
  being active. And at the same time, we were at
• 51:43
  a point with your work benefits that you had where it was kind
• 51:48
  of a use it or lose it situation.
• 51:50
  And we only had a month left of the benefits which I hadn't used
• 51:54
  any of them. I was just crushing massages,
• 51:58
  physio Osteo within that month. I was going, you know, basically
• 52:03
  just something every day and starting to work with a trainer
• 52:06
  and getting that slow progression and seeing the
• 52:09
  difference. And the trainer that I work
• 52:11
  with, they had this in body machine, that would kind of
• 52:14
  measure total body fat and weight, and all these metrics
• 52:19
  and spit it out. And it was pretty cool to be
• 52:21
  able to do that month-over-month and actually see in the As well
• 52:26
  and have that as an indicator of certainly, I'm starting to feel
• 52:29
  good, but these numbers are starting to look pretty great.
• 52:32
  And I'm putting weight back on and I Healthcare Providers are
• 52:35
  telling me to eat everything in sight, which was a pretty fun
• 52:38
  period where there's literally nothing that was off limits, in
• 52:41
  terms of eat as much as you can, we all got to enjoy that
• 52:44
  benefit, I had to support you in that.
• 52:49
  That was really the turning point for me to be able to start
• 52:52
  moving the right direction for things.
• 52:55
  Before even getting the trachea water that happen with the
• 52:58
  trach, still in. And then when I was able to
• 53:01
  remove the trach, it obviously got me to take the next Leap.
• 53:06
  Forward in terms of being able to continue my Improvement and
• 53:10
  start to get my body back over. Some of the biggest takeaways.
• 53:13
  You know, you go through these exceptional, times, people write
• 53:16
  books about stuff like this, like here's the obstacle I
• 53:18
  overcame, here's what I'm taking away.
• 53:21
  What are some of the takeaways that you feel like have changed?
• 53:24
  You changed your life. Four things that, you know,
• 53:26
  think about differently as a result of going through such a
• 53:29
  wild ride and you don't even like roller coasters.
• 53:32
  So yeah, interesting question, I don't know if I would have any
• 53:38
  silver bullets, you kind of expect the like I just went
• 53:42
  through hell and I'm going to be a completely changed person.
• 53:46
  I think that I'm just kind of returning mostly hopefully to
• 53:51
  the person I was Prior and moving past it, I think.
• 53:55
  There were some small things along the way, like
• 53:57
  understanding, how to communicate with somebody who's
• 54:00
  going through something, like what we went through and I
• 54:04
  didn't really know how to be a proper wedding guests.
• 54:08
  Until I had a wedding. And I think the same goes for
• 54:12
  people that go through, pretty, crazy experiences when it comes
• 54:15
  to surgeries and stuff like that and medical stuff that it's hard
• 54:21
  communicating with people that have gone through that sort of
• 54:24
  stuff, I You know, as much as I will preface this, by saying
• 54:27
  that everybody who reached out friends and family and whatnot,
• 54:31
  I knew it was from a place of love and I appreciated that it
• 54:35
  was just tough in the moment. Something as simple as somebody
• 54:39
  asking, hey, how are you doing? Oh my God, I was such a loaded
• 54:43
  question for somebody going through an ordeal, like we went
• 54:46
  through it. Well, you know what, I was
• 54:49
  feeling pretty shitty yesterday, I'm feeling pretty shitty today
• 54:52
  and good chance, I'm gonna feel pretty shitty tomorrow and I
• 54:55
  might have to live with the trick for the rest of my life,
• 54:57
  how are you? Yeah, totally.
• 54:59
  Aw, that's not an easy thing and there was some that cut through
• 55:04
  and just stuck with me. I have a very good friend, Casey
• 55:07
  Archibald, shout out to you, who didn't ask any questions of me.
• 55:13
  He wasn't trying to see what could he do or anything like
• 55:17
  that. He literally just sent
• 55:19
  ridiculously stupid, dad jokes, and, you know, that may not work
• 55:23
  for everybody. But in that time, Time frame.
• 55:26
  It was just such a breath of fresh air that he wasn't asking
• 55:29
  for information about how I'm doing, which makes me have to
• 55:32
  relive that situation. He wasn't asking what he could
• 55:35
  do, which then puts almost additional burden on that person
• 55:39
  to now have two tasks, somebody with doing something to make
• 55:43
  them feel better, about helping you out and things like that.
• 55:46
  It was just very simple and straight to the point.
• 55:48
  And like I said, now that I've gone through it, it's not an
• 55:51
  easy situation to communicate and navigate with people going
• 55:54
  through those situations. Nations.
• 55:55
  But I definitely think twice about how I approach those
• 55:58
  situations and always have a good dad joke on the ready for
• 56:02
  people that may need it. Yeah, it's such a hard one.
• 56:06
  We've even had friends who have gone through stuff recently and
• 56:08
  I've said, you know, I wish that I don't know.
• 56:10
  It's like we've learned so much through this experience and then
• 56:13
  you get back onto the other side of it where you're not on the
• 56:15
  receiving end, you are reminded how hard it is to navigate, what
• 56:19
  that person might need in the moment.
• 56:20
  Like what you needed was different from what I needed.
• 56:23
  Like, I had my roster of girlfriends Call and just cry
• 56:26
  too. And they knew that what I needed
• 56:28
  was just to listen and for me to sometimes just be irrational and
• 56:31
  complain and for them to not have time, give advice or
• 56:35
  anything like that, and maybe it's asking like, maybe it's
• 56:37
  asking somebody not pay. What errand can I run for you
• 56:41
  or, like, what are you craving in the moment?
• 56:43
  And like, the person could be, like silence.
• 56:46
  Like, I actually don't want to talk to anybody.
• 56:47
  There's definitely moments where we had that surgery is one
• 56:49
  through three. We were like, I had that
• 56:52
  document. We were updating people.
• 56:54
  We are like running, and Gutting.
• 56:55
  It was like this well-oiled machine.
• 56:57
  By the following year were eight months pregnant.
• 57:01
  We don't know what the hell's going on.
• 57:04
  People are asking what is he getting out of the hospital?
• 57:05
  We don't even know why he's in the hospital.
• 57:07
  So really don't know. And by that point everything
• 57:10
  went out the window, the needs changed and that's a big
• 57:13
  takeaway for me is also just if you're the one experience it in
• 57:16
  the moment to know that the blog post or what another person is
• 57:21
  telling you you should do to survive that moment, it could
• 57:25
  work. Day, it might not work the next
• 57:26
  and like, you know, the Google Doc worked for that one set of
• 57:29
  surgeries, it didn't work the next time.
• 57:30
  And what we needed was just to be quiet and we shut the world
• 57:34
  out and that's what we needed. And I have no regrets about
• 57:36
  that. It might have made a few people
• 57:38
  upset, or whatever, but it wasn't about other people at
• 57:40
  that point. It was about us.
• 57:42
  And how are we going to survive this situation?
• 57:44
  And we've come back to those friendships and those
• 57:46
  relationships when we have the capacity to breathe and
• 57:50
  communicate and record a podcast on it, there was a certain
• 57:55
  Initiative that was taken that we noticed that worked well in
• 57:58
  our case and you know less of reach out and be like hey how
• 58:01
  can we help? What can we do?
• 58:03
  It's hey I've got this frozen lasagna, I'm gonna drop off your
• 58:06
  house. Say no if you don't want it
• 58:08
  otherwise it's going to be here at X time or whatever.
• 58:11
  I think that the move I think that we appreciate some of the
• 58:14
  height and just not having to organize and coordinate any
• 58:19
  support and just have that kind of more TurnKey aspect of
• 58:22
  things. And I think that we've tried to
• 58:24
  implement Some of that in our lives when friends have a baby
• 58:29
  or something like that, we try and just do something about it
• 58:32
  versus tiptoeing around. Like that was what to do, what
• 58:35
  can we do? Which can be burdensome for that
• 58:38
  person. Totally!
• 58:40
  Okay. I want to switch gears now, it's
• 58:43
  so interesting to hear your perspective on the whole
• 58:45
  situation. And might, I say, you're a great
• 58:48
  Storyteller, you're welcome on the podcast again, but I want to
• 58:51
  just touch on work for a bit and that is Thing, that was coming
• 58:56
  and going constantly with surgeries and can you share a
• 58:59
  bit about what that work. Journey looked like, throughout
• 59:02
  all of this other stuff here of navigating and juggling.
• 59:05
  Totally, I was in a situation where I had moved into an new
• 59:12
  company at and a 20-18 going into 2019 and I was in a new
• 59:19
  role it was a leadership role. I was Reina Department, I had
• 59:24
  people reporting into me. I was accountable for a lot of
• 59:26
  stuff, and I found out that I was going to be going in for
• 59:30
  surgery is in February. So, I had been in the position
• 59:34
  for 23 months. People are still like, who are
• 59:37
  you? Yeah, totally.
• 59:39
  What's your name? I don't like.
• 59:41
  Oh, PS. I'm going in for these major
• 59:42
  surgeries coming up. So I wouldn't say that.
• 59:45
  I really know the exact way to navigate things, I can share my
• 59:51
  experience and what I found going through it.
• 59:53
  I don't know what the perfect answer is.
• 59:55
  Is you mean navigating things from like if you're going
• 59:57
  through health challenges, navigating work family whatever.
• 1:00:01
  Yeah. Navigating the work situation
• 1:00:04
  when you find out that you're going to be going through these
• 1:00:07
  words, I all challenges that may take you away from work for a
• 1:00:11
  period of time. For me, I told work right away
• 1:00:16
  when I found out that I was going to be going in for
• 1:00:19
  surgery, I told them February basically, right after I found
• 1:00:23
  out, it was a new job and So I wanted to be a front open
• 1:00:27
  transfer, even if it wasn't a new job, that's just the way I
• 1:00:30
  roll and the way I operate in hindsight, I don't know what the
• 1:00:33
  best way to go about that is in Canada.
• 1:00:36
  Our Healthcare System can take a bit to gain momentum and also in
• 1:00:41
  my situation there was further tests that were required and
• 1:00:45
  they need to line things up and is much as it was a major
• 1:00:49
  surgery. It wasn't desperate surgery, it
• 1:00:52
  was something that I had been living and It was kind of like,
• 1:00:56
  I seem to be operating in fine, but they need to go in and fix
• 1:00:59
  the plumbing and just do some tuning up.
• 1:01:03
  So, it was a surgery that didn't actually happen until September.
• 1:01:06
  And I told the organization in February that it was gonna
• 1:01:10
  happen. So it was this kind of weird,
• 1:01:12
  sort of limbo, where we went through these months, where I
• 1:01:15
  didn't know when I was going to get the call and when that was
• 1:01:17
  gonna happen, so we weren't in a position where we're really able
• 1:01:21
  to prepare that far ahead. And I found out I was going in
• 1:01:25
  for surgery. All of I don't know, maybe ten
• 1:01:28
  days before surgery which then ended up, even though I told the
• 1:01:31
  organization months I had it was a Mad Dash in a scramble to get
• 1:01:36
  everything organized before I went off.
• 1:01:38
  I think another thing in hindsight navigating that work
• 1:01:41
  relationship that I figured out after the first set of surgeries
• 1:01:45
  and I kind of learned from that experience is you should really
• 1:01:49
  figure out what your workplace, what your medical leave plan
• 1:01:53
  looks like up front. And figure out.
• 1:01:57
  Am I going to stay on salary? Am I gonna go oniy?
• 1:02:00
  I how do I apply for? He, I, what's my expected.
• 1:02:04
  Return date, in my case, given it was such a short Runway.
• 1:02:09
  Before I went in for surgery, my employers trying to help me
• 1:02:14
  navigate that they said, well, let's just figure it out.
• 1:02:16
  After you go in, you focus on your health, you get your
• 1:02:20
  surgeries done, we'll talk about it after which for me.
• 1:02:24
  Now And through it I realized that I should have really kind
• 1:02:28
  of push to figure out what exactly that was going to look
• 1:02:30
  like what we found out after the first set of surgery is you
• 1:02:34
  can't necessarily apply for EI retroactively, my company
• 1:02:38
  decided to leave me on salary but basically I had to pay back
• 1:02:44
  for some of that period that I was off, which meant that we
• 1:02:47
  finally decided and agreed on. We were just going to wipe out
• 1:02:51
  all my remaining vacation for that previous year and all All
• 1:02:55
  my vacation going forward for that next year seemed like an
• 1:02:59
  okay plan at the time, but jumping right back into work and
• 1:03:03
  going through that year without a single day off.
• 1:03:05
  After that experience, it was something that definitely didn't
• 1:03:10
  land me back in the hospital but it definitely wait on me.
• 1:03:13
  In terms of not being able to fully balance work and rehab and
• 1:03:19
  taking care of myself to jump right back into things without
• 1:03:23
  having any days off and looking. Back at how much time you ended
• 1:03:27
  up having to take off like that year, basically, when Addie was
• 1:03:30
  little that you ended up taking off thinking about those first
• 1:03:33
  three surgeries were major heart surgeries.
• 1:03:35
  And then taking after that last third surgery, which was really
• 1:03:38
  big and it was a really hard recovery, you were off for like
• 1:03:41
  a month or something. Yeah, I mean, those three
• 1:03:44
  surgeries happen over the course of a couple months.
• 1:03:46
  And so I was in and out of work, I would be off for a few weeks
• 1:03:49
  and then I'll be back and then I go in for another surgery and
• 1:03:52
  I'd be all for a week. And then back, I think the
• 1:03:54
  largest period I was awful. Was maybe six weeks.
• 1:03:57
  The doctors had recommended about three months given I would
• 1:04:00
  remained on salary with the organization.
• 1:04:03
  I just felt the pull to go back to work and get back to work as
• 1:04:07
  quickly as possible. So I brush it back and I
• 1:04:10
  remember being back at the first day of work and working on this
• 1:04:14
  big presentation for Dell technologies that I was at work
• 1:04:17
  in the office pre-pandemic till after 8.
• 1:04:21
  P.m. literally my first day, back in the office, coming back
• 1:04:25
  from These major surgeries and given we had the fact that we
• 1:04:29
  had more surgeries down the road in the do-over.
• 1:04:32
  We approach things very differently the next time around
• 1:04:34
  where it was like no I'm gonna go any eyes so I don't feel the
• 1:04:38
  pull to get back to work. I'm going to take the time that
• 1:04:41
  I need. I'm going to go along with
• 1:04:43
  exactly what the doctor recommends which ended up due to
• 1:04:46
  my vocal cords and whatnot was all of ten months being off.
• 1:04:49
  When I go back, I'm gonna go back in a graduate at format and
• 1:04:53
  not get slapped in the face. As with it a p.m. working on a
• 1:04:57
  presentation, the first time back.
• 1:04:59
  How did you make that bridge and that decision to get into the
• 1:05:02
  work that you're doing now? Maybe you can explain.
• 1:05:04
  So I think this is interesting. I think there's a lot of sorry
• 1:05:06
  before I go into like my actual question, I think there's some
• 1:05:09
  interesting parallels with perhaps the audience here where
• 1:05:12
  people might be coming or going from a maternity leave and they
• 1:05:15
  might actually resonate with a bit of the story around that
• 1:05:18
  feeling of like oh I should be going back, putting the word
• 1:05:21
  should in front of anything. So you're going back to work
• 1:05:24
  after. All is said and done.
• 1:05:26
  Eight surgeries and work. Looks a little different for
• 1:05:29
  you. Can you share a bit more about
• 1:05:31
  that in the decision-making process that went into all that?
• 1:05:34
  I was basically cleared to go back about four days of work a
• 1:05:40
  week with limited meetings. So trying to ensure that I had
• 1:05:46
  down time where I was able to reply to emails and do stuff
• 1:05:49
  like that. There would give my vocal cords
• 1:05:53
  break so I was cleared for I that that was, you know, in the
• 1:05:57
  fall kind of september/october time, period of 2021 and through
• 1:06:04
  working with the organization that I was with and coming back
• 1:06:07
  off medical leave, we had quite a bit of back and forth and I
• 1:06:11
  would say to anybody whether they're going through medical
• 1:06:14
  leave or mat leave, and they're starting those discussions up
• 1:06:18
  with an organization and they are unsure how to navigate it.
• 1:06:23
  I would say don't be afraid to Reach out for legal support
• 1:06:28
  through that. I initially had support from a
• 1:06:31
  good friend of mine. T who is a lawyer?
• 1:06:34
  And she was able to Ali's kind of give me some initial guidance
• 1:06:39
  and as we got deeper into the back and forth with
• 1:06:42
  organization, what I was going to look like my return and
• 1:06:45
  making sure that worked for me. I got to the point where I
• 1:06:47
  actually needed some additional more formal legal support.
• 1:06:51
  So reach out to an actual firm that deals in Employment law.
• 1:06:56
  And they were just very supportive and just ensured that
• 1:06:59
  I was set up for success and new what I should be negotiating or
• 1:07:04
  not in terms of my return and how to make it work for me,
• 1:07:07
  ultimately we decided what the organization that I was with.
• 1:07:11
  At that point that I wouldn't go back.
• 1:07:14
  I would part ways with our organization.
• 1:07:16
  So we amicably, parted ways, and I moved on for that
• 1:07:21
  organization, which I think mentally, I was ready to Hit the
• 1:07:25
  reset button and try something new at that point.
• 1:07:28
  Anyways from there I was kind of left with.
• 1:07:31
  Okay what do I want to do next? I've worked across a number of
• 1:07:34
  different agencies and different markets and different clients.
• 1:07:38
  What do I want to do from here? And at that point I was trying
• 1:07:42
  to figure out what I want to do and I kind of just fell into a
• 1:07:47
  couple contracts one from a good colleague of mine.
• 1:07:50
  You mentioned that they may need some marketing support with
• 1:07:54
  there. Organization.
• 1:07:56
  They're going through, a change organizationally from a branding
• 1:08:00
  identity perspective. They were going to be rolling
• 1:08:03
  out a new brand identity and they didn't necessarily know how
• 1:08:06
  to go about that. Then there is another company.
• 1:08:09
  They came about, I roll my eyes because my mother is gonna love
• 1:08:13
  that she has a shadow for this, but she was talking to the
• 1:08:16
  neighbor and they put me in touch with a colleague that
• 1:08:21
  landed me another contract. So I don't know where where I
• 1:08:24
  was This is really looking to be in the contract world.
• 1:08:28
  I kind of just fell into it and for me it was just at the time,
• 1:08:32
  just a bridge. Okay, I'm gonna work on this.
• 1:08:34
  It's going to be short term period.
• 1:08:35
  I'm going to feel it out and have an income come back to me,
• 1:08:40
  which is going to work. Well, well I figure out what
• 1:08:42
  ultimately, I want to do and then fast forward over a year
• 1:08:46
  later. I'm still working in this
• 1:08:48
  contract capacity and it's been great.
• 1:08:50
  I've never seen you happier in the workspace without like
• 1:08:54
  speaking on your behalf. A half just from my perspective
• 1:08:57
  seeing you finish up work at a very reasonable time we're
• 1:09:01
  cooking or playing with a d by 5:00, 5:30 or sitting down as a
• 1:09:05
  family to eat dinner at 6 every single night.
• 1:09:09
  Oh my gosh, it's just such a gift and to get to see you and
• 1:09:12
  just to chat about our days in this like fun positive way.
• 1:09:15
  Like, oh, this funny thing happened at work today or I can
• 1:09:18
  share like, oh this client did this really cool thing while
• 1:09:21
  protecting privacy. Of course our dinner
• 1:09:24
  conversations are just So different to, what advice would
• 1:09:27
  you give to anybody who might be considering contract work?
• 1:09:30
  As an option for shaking things up?
• 1:09:32
  When they become a parent, you know what I liked about, what
• 1:09:36
  I've been enjoying about contract work, is getting paid
• 1:09:39
  for every hour that I work, which is a complete change.
• 1:09:43
  I was always in world of advertising where I will work,
• 1:09:46
  incredibly long hours and sometimes my timesheets would
• 1:09:50
  show over a full week's worth of work and in two days of the
• 1:09:54
  week. And was Christian or going over
• 1:09:57
  the eight hour work weeks which was crazy.
• 1:10:00
  And I was always nervous to think about what if I calculated
• 1:10:03
  my hourly rate based on my salary and how much actually
• 1:10:06
  work and it was just kind of a draining thing in it and that
• 1:10:11
  was before I had kid soon-to-be. Kids said to now thinking about
• 1:10:17
  okay, how do I ensure that I had to have balance, which is really
• 1:10:20
  important for me and being able to have that game paid for Our
• 1:10:25
  means if I need to plug in after I put a tee down to bed for a
• 1:10:30
  couple hours, it just doesn't feel like this grueling
• 1:10:33
  exercise. It means I'm doing it, and for
• 1:10:37
  every hour that I'm putting in, I'm getting something out of it.
• 1:10:40
  And likewise, I don't have to feel incredibly guilty if I need
• 1:10:44
  that space and time within the typical work week to go and see
• 1:10:48
  my trainer for a session and do physical activity outside of it
• 1:10:52
  or something, comes up with the Agency for the new baby and I
• 1:10:56
  need to drive you to get checked out with your, OB, I can do that
• 1:11:01
  and feel like that's fine. I'm not getting paid for that
• 1:11:06
  time. I can make it back later or I
• 1:11:09
  cannot. So it just gives me a lot more
• 1:11:11
  control that I've preciate it during this time to work when I
• 1:11:15
  work best. And when I'm not working, that's
• 1:11:19
  okay. I'm not letting anybody down
• 1:11:21
  because I'm not charging you for that time.
• 1:11:23
  That's really cool. Scotty.
• 1:11:25
  Well, would you say you're still trying to figure out?
• 1:11:27
  Well, I would say everything, but if I was to narrow it down,
• 1:11:32
  I probably say, three buckets from a work perspective, this
• 1:11:35
  contract work has been great. I would say that contract work
• 1:11:40
  is really only as good as the pipe line of work that's coming
• 1:11:44
  in. So, I'm figuring out how to
• 1:11:47
  maintain a steady Pipeline and steady flow of work.
• 1:11:52
  So I have lots to dig into Scotty, barbaracle, Um.com,
• 1:11:56
  yeah, I'm getting. No, really, he's great.
• 1:12:03
  I would say, from a family perspective, I'm figuring out.
• 1:12:06
  Baby. Number two, that is fast
• 1:12:08
  approaching, which I'm finding seems to be a Common Thread with
• 1:12:11
  people that have more than one kids's.
• 1:12:13
  You tend to be over prepared for the first kid and drastically
• 1:12:17
  under prepared for the second. Get it.
• 1:12:19
  So we're figuring out. Where are we gonna put this
• 1:12:21
  baby? And what's that room going to
• 1:12:24
  look like and Are we going to work from home as to working
• 1:12:28
  from home adults and a house that we love.
• 1:12:32
  But we got it. Not thinking that we were both
• 1:12:35
  going to be working from home. So having two kids.
• 1:12:39
  Yeah. And then I would say lastly from
• 1:12:41
  a health perspective it's been a crazy Health Journey for me and
• 1:12:45
  I always appreciate it being active, but I am focusing even
• 1:12:50
  more attention on my body and getting that back to where It
• 1:12:55
  was and staying healthy. And so figuring out how to
• 1:12:58
  balance this work situation and family and giving my full time
• 1:13:05
  and attention to my family. Well, focusing on my help and
• 1:13:10
  continuing to push that forward. Your real life superhero.
• 1:13:13
  My Iron Man care, The Rock in our family.
• 1:13:17
  You've gone through so much for us and I guess with us and you
• 1:13:22
  inspire me a lot, it was really fun, getting to chat with you
• 1:13:24
  and Your side of the story, I've lived my own side of the story,
• 1:13:28
  but that was pretty cool and I think it's going to be super
• 1:13:30
  inspiring for anybody going through a hard time or rocky
• 1:13:33
  time know that you can go through some really crazy stuff
• 1:13:37
  and come out I think even better.
• 1:13:39
  I think you were saying you're on it to get back to Baseline, I
• 1:13:42
  think you're even better so thank you for coming on.
• 1:13:45
  I love you. Have you to thank you for
• 1:13:48
  listening. You can access all resources
• 1:13:50
  mentioned in this episode via my website andreea bar.com, /
• 1:13:54
  podcast, And let's chat on Instagram.
• 1:13:56
  I'm at andreea bar coaching and I reply to every DM, I get if
• 1:14:00
  you loved this episode, don't forget to quickly hit that
• 1:14:03
  button on your podcast app to give me a five star rating, and
• 1:14:06
  drop in a review. It would truly mean the world
• 1:14:09
  and if you're like me and love to share things that you love,
• 1:14:13
  send this episode to a friend who you think would appreciate
• 1:14:15
  this topic. Thanks again for listening, and
• 1:14:18
  I'll chat with you next week. And let's chat on Instagram.
• 1:13:56
  I'm at andreea bar coaching and I reply to every DM, I get if
• 1:14:00
  you loved this episode, don't forget to quickly hit that
• 1:14:03
  button on your podcast app to give me a five star rating, and
• 1:14:06
  drop in a review. It would truly mean the world
• 1:14:09
  and if you're like me and love to share things that you love,
• 1:14:13
  send this episode to a friend who you think would appreciate
• 1:14:15
  this topic. Thanks again for listening, and
• 1:14:18
  I'll chat with you next week.