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Innocent Dating Mistakes That Repel Healthy Love · Mindful Success Path

• 0:32
  In this video, we're gonna be talking about some innocent dating mistakes that women make that will absolutely repel a good man and maybe keep you attached to a bad one.
• 0:42
  Hi, my name is Amanda.
• 0:43
  Welcome to this channel where we talk about how to manifest what you want in life without all the extra stress, chaos, and drama that most people are accustomed to.
• 0:50
  Lately, we've been talking a lot about nervous system regulation.
• 0:54
  We've been talking about polarity in relationships.
• 0:56
  We've been talking about how to become a more magnetic and attractive woman.
• 1:00
  This is based on my 15 years of experience coaching women in different areas of their lives, and also my own transformation where I went from being hyper-independent, hypervigilant, stressed out all the time, thyroid problems, nonexistent relationships for over a decade, to in 18 months meeting my provider, protector husband, living out a lifelong dream of moving abroad, and now making money in ways that are more feminine, more easy, and more creative and more passive.
• 1:29
  So if you're interested in those kinds of subjects, make sure to subscribe so you don't miss a single video that we have coming out on this channel.
• 1:36
  And whether you are new or returning, I have a gift for you that's going to help you get more context on where you might be in your own dating life.
• 1:46
  I have put together a free quiz called the Divine Feminine Energy Stages Quiz, and this is based on the four stages of divine feminine energy that I teach.
• 1:56
  These are four stages of healing that a woman goes through, and as she goes further up on those stages, then she is more likely to attract healthier men.
• 2:06
  If you have not taken the quiz yet, make sure to do so.
• 2:09
  Just go to mindfulsuccesspath.com/quiz because it will let you know, which of the four archetypes is most dominant for you, and then it'll let you know how that archetype is showing up in your relationships, how it's showing up with your money, how it's showing up in your body, and how you generally see the world based on your archetype.
• 2:29
  And in addition to that, it'll teach you what your next steps are moving forward in order to get to a healthier place.
• 2:36
  So let's get into the innocent mistakes that women make.
• 2:40
  Now, if you've ever taken my Feminine Magnetism Mastery training, Which if you haven't, you can grab it below, or you can join my membership, The Temple, where you get access to every single class that I have ever taught and all the classes I'm gonna be teaching moving forward, right now, we're releasing one to two new classes a month.
• 2:57
  You can learn more about it below.
• 2:59
  But if you've got Feminine Magnetism Mastery, then you know that in there I talk about this idea that a lot of the ways that women repel men is because women think that they're being a nice person, or they're being a good person, or they're showing interest, and then they don't realize that what they're doing is actually repelling healthy men.
• 3:20
  So let me set the stage and just say some of the innocent mistakes that women make.
• 3:25
  Mistake number one, girl, you're doing too much too soon, okay?
• 3:28
  What do I mean by that, right?
• 3:30
  You're cooking, you're cleaning, you're managing him.
• 3:34
  A lot of times y'all are doing this for men who literally have not claimed you yet.
• 3:38
  Sometimes you are in a relationship in your head, but he is not in a relationship with you.
• 3:43
  But let's give the benefit of the doubt and say that you are seeing this man, and you're in the early stages of dating, and you're already offering to cook for him.
• 3:51
  You're already going to his place and you're cooking.
• 3:52
  You're already going to his place and you're cleaning it.
• 3:55
  One of the biggest mistakes that women make, whether they're dating or married, is that they become way too convenient to men.
• 4:02
  And what women don't understand is that men need challenge in order to actually bond with you.
• 4:08
  And if you're being too convenient to him, and you're making things way too easy for him, then two things happen.
• 4:16
  So like number one, there's literally no reason for him to commit when you are in the dating stages, because a lot of the things that were reserved for after someone is married now is happening just while people are casually dating.
• 4:30
  So that's number one.
• 4:31
  And then num- the number two thing that happens is, let's say you are married, even though this was for dating, but let's say you are married, over time he's gonna end up becoming more passive, and then you might feel like you are more in a roommate situation, or you might feel like you're the mom and he's the child, right?
• 4:46
  So we have to be very mindful of not over-functioning.
• 4:50
  Now why do women do this?
• 4:51
  Women do this because they feel like if they do things for men, then the man is actually going to choose them and be like,"She makes such a good wife." The only thing you're doing at that point is you're auditioning for a man, because the way that he actually bonds to you is by doing things for you, right?
• 5:08
  That's how this actually works.
• 5:10
  And again, if you want deeper of the psychology of that, check out Feminine Magnetism Mastery, or you can join, The Temple and you get all access to all the classes I've ever done.
• 5:20
  The second mistake that a lot of women make, which is very innocent, is taking the leadership in the relationship.
• 5:27
  So you start planning all the dates.
• 5:29
  You start managing all the things.
• 5:31
  Now, the reason why women do this is because they're like,"Oh, well, if I do that, then it's showing him interest.
• 5:37
  He knows that I actually like him." But that's not what's happening internally.
• 5:42
  What's happening internally is that you are taking his position as a man.
• 5:46
  You are taking his position as the leader, and then over time, he actually ends up being less attracted to you, A healthy man will end up being less attracted to you, or you're gonna end up in a dynamic with a man who expects you to be his mother.
• 6:01
  So that's one of the things to be mindful of as well.
• 6:04
  A lot of times women will do this, number one, because again, they, they think that they're showing interest when they do that.
• 6:10
  Or the other thing that happens is they, they feel like,"I have to move this relationship forward." Like, a woman will feel anxiety internally because she, she wants to be in a relationship, so she'll start taking control of where the relationship is going.
• 6:25
  A controlling woman is not an attractive woman to a healthy, masculine man.
• 6:30
  She's just not.
• 6:31
  And to be honest, a controlling woman is not attractive to anyone, man or woman.
• 6:37
  So you have to learn to slow down your anxiety, and I'm gonna let you know something.
• 6:41
  A man who wants you, a man who is devoted to you, a man who wants to commit to you, he's not gonna leave you in the dark about where you stand.
• 6:49
  He may be thoughtful, especially if you're, like, on date one or two.
• 6:52
  Like, he's gonna be thoughtful in how he moves.
• 6:55
  He's not gonna rush you.
• 6:57
  However, he's gonna let you know where you stand.
• 7:01
  The men who leave you confused are men who were never planning on committing to you to begin with.
• 7:07
  Number three, she's too available.
• 7:09
  Again, a lot of women do this because they think that if she's always available and always there, then the man is going to see that as,"Oh, she likes me.
• 7:18
  She's interested in me." Here's the funny thing, right?
• 7:22
  In order for there to be some attraction in the relationship, there needs to be some space in between the two of you.
• 7:29
  Sometimes if you are too available to a man, in the early dating stages, if you're too available, he reads that as you got nothing else going on.
• 7:37
  He reads that as you're going to put him on a pedestal.
• 7:40
  He reads that as he's going to be the prize, and men who think that they are the prize are feminine men.
• 7:45
  So the only men who are even going to allow you to do that and stick around are feminine men.
• 7:50
  Meanwhile, a masculine man, he needs to wonder about you.
• 7:54
  He need, he needs to wonder where you are.
• 7:56
  Even when you're married, right?
• 7:57
  A lot of women will make the mistake of making their entire lives their kids and their husband, and then they're, like, absolutely drained, and they feel like they're not nourishing themselves.
• 8:07
  They're not giving to themselves.
• 8:08
  They're arguing with their spouse all the time.
• 8:10
  Even the married women, I'm like,"Go get a hobby.
• 8:12
  Go do something," right?
• 8:13
  "Go entertain yourself somehow," especially once the kids get older, right?
• 8:17
  "Go entertain yourself somehow.
• 8:18
  Go do something.
• 8:19
  Go have your own interests.
• 8:21
  Go be your own person." So in the, in the very beginning dating stages, it just shows a man that you've got nothing else going on, and I teach you how to build a high-value life from the inside out in the High Value Woman Transformation.
• 8:35
  You can find the link to that below as well, or like I said, you could just join our Temple membership, and you'll get access to every class I've ever done, the entire library.
• 8:43
  I think we're up to, like, 30-plus classes at this point, plus any new classes that I'm going to have coming out moving forward to help you in dating and relationships and feminine energy.
• 8:55
  The next mistake that women make, I'm just calling y'all out on it, right, is you don't have any boundaries.
• 9:00
  You continue giving access to men who have not proven that they are good men, who have not proven that they're committed to you, who have not proven that you're on the same page, who have not proven anything to you, and you guys give way too much access, and even worse, some of you continue giving access to men who treat you terribly.
• 9:21
  They'll breadcrumb you.
• 9:22
  They'll disappear.
• 9:23
  They'll leave you in a state of confusion, and you continue giving these men access, right?
• 9:29
  Or for example, let's say you want monogamy, and he doesn't, right?
• 9:32
  Like, you wanna be committed, but he wants to continue playing the field.
• 9:36
  And then you think that twisting yourself into a pretzel and again be giving him access or being available...
• 9:42
  A lot of women sometimes think,"Well, if I'm the one who's available, and I'm the one who gives him access, then he's gonna leave tho-" other women alone.
• 9:50
  No, he's gonna be messing around with all of you is what he's going to do.
• 9:55
  But you know what he's going to do?
• 9:56
  He'll fall in love with the woman who doesn't play those games.
• 9:58
  He'll fall in love with the woman who's not even interested in him because he plays those games.
• 10:03
  And I've heard men say this, like, when women don't have standards, what ends up happening is that healthy men are not attracted to women without standards.
• 10:12
  And the other thing that happens is men will get flexible, right?
• 10:18
  Like, if you allow men to color outside the lines, let's put it that way, they're, they're gonna find a way to color outside the lines.
• 10:27
  It's just the way that they are.
• 10:28
  I've had men admit this to me constantly.
• 10:31
  So they need a woman with boundaries, not in a way where she's controlling him, but in a way where his actions or lack of actions have actual consequences.
• 10:41
  And a lot of women out here, again, because they wanna be picked and they wanna be chosen, a man will treat her like trash, and she will continue giving him access.
• 10:49
  Her words mean nothing to him, and he will continue using the access if he is a bad man.
• 10:55
  Now, if he's a good man, he's just gonna walk away.
• 10:57
  He's not gonna be interested in you at all And the final mistake that women make in early dating is that They divulge too much too soon.
• 11:06
  So this could look like telling him too much about your childhood or your trauma or your past experiences.
• 11:13
  It could also look like sleeping with a man too soon, like giving him too much access to your body too soon.
• 11:19
  When you do this too soon, you go into a state of crazy, okay?
• 11:25
  I'm just gonna be honest'cause I coach a lot of you, you go crazy in your minds because now suddenly you feel bonded to this man.
• 11:32
  You're like,"Oh, but we're being intimate.
• 11:33
  I'm sharing all these, you know, wounded things about me and I'm, I'm s- I can be so open with him," or, or like,"The sex was so good.
• 11:42
  I feel so bonded to him." That means nothing to him as a man.
• 11:47
  It means absolutely nothing.
• 11:49
  And you wanna know why?
• 11:49
  Because that's not how men bond and fall in love.
• 11:53
  So when women have sex, their bonding hormone comes online.
• 11:57
  Man- a man's bonding hormone comes online when he has challenge.
• 12:02
  Now, that doesn't mean that he cannot bond to a woman during sex.
• 12:05
  Of course he can, but usually he's bonding to a woman he's already in love with, right?
• 12:10
  If you're not a challenge to him, uh, if you don't have boundaries, like there's no way for this man to actually bond to you, but, you know, you're convenient, so he'll use you like a convenience.
• 12:21
  And then what happens is that many of you later feel very upset, or you feel like you're being used, or you feel like he's a bad man.
• 12:29
  And sometimes he is a completely bad man and he never should have done what he did, but other times, like sweetie, you just need to understand how men operate, and you need to understand how you operate, and you need to understand that the way that you, that he bonds to you is not the same way that women bond.
• 12:44
  And what happens, and this is another inno mis- innocent mistake that women make, is women assume that men operate like women.
• 12:52
  I think it's Allison Armstrong, I think her name is,"The Queen's Code," who says women treat men like they're hairy women.
• 13:00
  Like you talk to a man like he's a woman.
• 13:03
  You, um, bond with a man or as if he's a woman, or you think he bonds the same way that women bond.
• 13:11
  Here's another example of that.
• 13:12
  Let's say a guy talks to you for six hours one night.
• 13:15
  A woman is like,"Oh my God.
• 13:16
  We're so in love.
• 13:18
  We're falling in love.
• 13:18
  We talked for six hours," because that's how women bond.
• 13:23
  It means nothing to a man.
• 13:24
  He's just like,"Whatever, I had some time to kill.""So I talked to her for six hours." And yeah, I've heard stories like that of some of y'all going out on vacation, you meet a guy when you're on vacation, you sleep with him, and then on top of that you talk to him for six hours and you're already imagining the whole white picket fence.
• 13:41
  Meanwhile, he hasn't called you because that is not how men bond and how they fall in love.
• 13:45
  It just is what it is.
• 13:47
  And I tell women all the time, like you just have to understand how men operate.
• 13:51
  And in Feminine Magnetism Mastery, I go deeper into how men operate.
• 13:55
  'Cause again, most of the mistakes that women are making are just, a lot of them are innocent, right?
• 14:00
  A lot of them are just you thinking that you're a good person, or you thinking that, uh, you're showing him that you're interested, and that's fine.
• 14:08
  Like I said, it's an innocent mistake, but if you wanna actually be committed, and you actually wanna be partnered, you have to understand how men actually operate, because they operate in a very different way than women do.
• 14:22
  And again, you can get Feminine Magnetism Mastery on its own or anything that I've mentioned on this video.
• 14:27
  I think I mentioned High Value Woman Transformation.
• 14:30
  Uh, Magnetic Commitment would also be a pretty good one for those of you who wanna dive deeper.
• 14:34
  You can buy them on their own separately, or you can join our Temple membership where you get access to all of them, plus every class I've ever taught and any class I will be teaching moving forward.
• 14:46
  You can find more information about that below.
• 14:49
  If you liked this video, go ahead and give it a thumbs up.
• 14:51
  Hit the notification bell so you don't miss a single video that we have coming out on this channel.
• 14:56
  Share this with a girlfriend, because again, these are innocent mistakes.
• 14:59
  Women are out here doing this stuff all the time, and they don't realize that they're shooting themselves in the foot.
• 15:04
  They don't realize that they're repelling healthy men, and they're behaving in ways that attract unhealthy men.
• 15:10
  They don't know that they're doing this.
• 15:11
  So share this out with a girlfriend, and thank you so much for giving me your time today, and I'll catch you on the next one.