Latest / Trudge Report / Ep. 141 - Parenting in Recovery: Sobriety, Trust & Letting Kids Grow Up.

Transcript

Ep. 141 - Parenting in Recovery: Sobriety, Trust & Letting Kids Grow Up. · Trudge Report

• 0:07
  SPEAKER_01: Ladies and gentlemen, good evening and welcome to another episode of Trudge Report.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_01: This is a recovery-based podcast.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: My name is Sean, and I am your host, joined by my good friends and fellow Trudgers.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_01: Please remember to listen on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you may get your podcasts.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_01: Videos will be posted each week so you can watch episodes on YouTube and Facebook.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: But as always, please be sure to download on your listening platforms.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: Remember to like and subscribe on all social media outlets with the handle at TrudgeReport Pod.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_01: Again, that is at TrudgeReport Pod.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: This podcast is brought to you exclusively by Stella Mix Podcast Management.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: Gentlemen, good evening.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: Happy recording day.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_01: The band is back together.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um, what is going on?
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: Let's start with uh for those who will watch this.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Mr.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: GA Phillips is in some kind of graveyard and he has penises behind him over his right shoulder.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, you see that very phallic.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: Uh thank you.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: Greg, what's going on, buddy?
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_02: The ground is just as bricked up as I am.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_02: Already for a good episode.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_02: I can break the coming to you live from the front yard.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_02: Um, yeah, man.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_02: It's uh it's it's been a busy, uh, busy weekend, man.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_02: We uh we went down uh down past Dan's neck of the woods uh for a wedding this weekend.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: Um a lot of fun, a lot of good times.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: Um and uh yeah, came back home today.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_02: Got uh oh, actually, let me let me rewind.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_02: This morning we went and stopped at the only Bucky's that is in the uh great state of Ohio, and it was my first Buckey's experience.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_02: Was it been hyping me up for months about this?
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_02: Uh might actually might have been years.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_02: Uh what'd you think about this Buckeys?
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_02: A true sensory experience going down there at 11.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_02: There's a lot going on.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_02: There is so much going on, okay.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_02: Um, employees shouting uh uh about fresh brisket on the cutting board.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_02: Uh and they greet you.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Bucket, dude.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_02: Everybody's in a suit and tie.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: Well, the first thing you're greeted with is um uh a big board that shows how much they all make, and it's absolutely astounding.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_02: A general manager of this place makes 300k a year.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_02: It's wild.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, but and but you find out why as you as you explore.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_02: Man, I will say it was uh it was pretty spectacular.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_02: I've I've never seen anything quite like that at a gas station.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_02: And the gas was a buck cheaper than it is up here, which was kind of cool.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_02: But um, but yeah, the food was the food was great for for gas.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_02: I want to throw the eggs.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_02: I got a price on the eggs.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_02: I got a price on the eggs.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_03: Can you buy them singular?
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: 96 cents over here, boys.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_02: Got got uh Peyton and myself some matching uh glow-in-the-dark Bucky's Halloween t-shirts, real nice.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, I'm you know, you could you could shop in there for hours.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_02: They got I mean it was it was like kind of like half gas station, half cabela's in there.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_02: Greg, where where is it?
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_02: It's uh in Dayton.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, all right.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, all right.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_02: So um what'd you buy?
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: What kind of food did you get?
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, dude, I got a uh a triple meat sandwich.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_02: It was uh brisket, turkey, and uh sausage, and it was of it was it was breathing heavy.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_02: It's all man, it was amazing.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_02: It was amazing.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_02: Had to get some tots.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_02: Any place that has tots, I'm I'm on board for it.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_02: Most of the time the tots are all the same anywhere you go, but I I got I'm always uh I'm a connoisseur of a good tot.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: So um the beef jerky's good, they make their own beef jerky is really good.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_01: The peach cobbler, obviously, that's been well documented on the city.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_02: The peach cobbler.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_02: I I was I mean, for for gas gas station peach cobbler, which you know, um is the only gas station I've ever been to and got cobbler from.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: It was it was pretty good, it was it was decent, you know.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_02: Um just it was it just absolutely insane.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_02: We rolled up in there.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_02: The place is the size of a small Walmart.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_02: Dude, crazy.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_02: There are there are 95 fucking gas pumps at this place.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_02: Um it was just wild.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: It was it was a true experience.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_02: I'm glad I went, it was awesome.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: So you know what we've made a habit of drive up to Jersey fairly often, and we tend to do it at different seasons, and they all have they have a seasonal Bucky's blanket.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so we it's like 15 bucks.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: We try to grab one of those every season.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: We have like a Valentine's Day, a Halloween one now, fourth of July, all kinds of shit.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: That might be the most useless thing.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: The guy in the house.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, a blanket's useless, Sean.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: You ever get cold?
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: You ever get cold, Sean?
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, uh the the fourth of July one might I'm speaking from a little PSD.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: My my kids literally have like 27 blankets in their bedroom.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's ridiculous.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: So many goddamn blankets.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, what's PSD?
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_02: Forgot the tea, boy.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_02: What Corey will throw throw some tea at you.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_02: It'll it'll be fine.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_02: Um the dude in front of uh front of me had to have dropped four or five hundred bucks.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_02: He had a shopping cart full of stuff.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_02: It looked like he had about eight sandwiches in this shopping cart, uh, but all kinds of stuff.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_02: But the he had a full-size Bucky the Beaver suit, like a like a step-in and zip it up suit.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_02: He was wearing it?
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_02: No, he bought it.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_02: Oh god.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_02: That alone had to have been a hundred bucks.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_03: That's the only time he comes to town a year a year, once a year he comes to town.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_03: Consumerism at its finest.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: I've seen our I've seen our buddy Kyle drop 80 bucks on just beef jerky in there like twice.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: It can be done.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_01: It can be done.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's good jerky.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yes indeed.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: Good stuff.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: Danny P, what's going on, buddy?
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_03: Oh man, what is what did I do last week?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_03: That was oh, we had date night last week.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's why I wasn't on here.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, just crazy busy, man.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, work is like non-stop.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, I'm very excited for it to hopefully slow down here in the next two weeks.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_03: But uh, with going to Connecticut and all my trips and traveling and stuff, work just like stacked up unreal.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_03: And I've been working seven days a week, like ten-hour days.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_03: Pretty pretty exhausted.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_03: But uh Alyssa's, she's doing first shift, man.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_03: So that's been a game changer.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: You know, that's been real nice.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_03: Uh having nice normal family uh evenings and dinner and stuff like that.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_03: That's been real cool.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_03: We got our last uh softball tournament of the year coming up on Saturday, and it's gonna be uh I got my super troopers outfit, and we're dressing up as the girls are gonna be inmates, and we're the coaches are gonna be the cops, and we're gonna try to win that costume contest.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_03: So that's just yeah, that's gonna be fun.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_03: That's gonna be a cool little all-day Saturday event to uh end the softball year with.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_03: And um otherwise, uh everything's pretty good.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_03: My son's uh my son's uh the football team's uh number 17 in the state.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_03: I think they lost though, so they're probably gonna drop.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_03: But it's pretty cool just for him being a freshman.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_03: He's not gonna play in varsity, but you know, just being around it and all that stuff, man.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_03: It's just cool for him to experience Friday night lights, all that stuff, and being a part of the team.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_03: And he loves it.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_03: He loves it so much.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he actually got the JV game, he got a couple tackles, he plays corner and he plays um wide receiver, but they let him kick off.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_03: And uh, so that was pretty cool.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_03: He he asked the coach if he can kick off, and uh he's like intrigued to uh be the kicker.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: I said, just don't kick it out of the bounds, out of bounds, bro.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_03: Just anything but a flag, man.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_03: I said anything but a flag, you'll be good.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_03: And uh so he did he did alright, so he's super pumped about that.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_03: But um otherwise everything's pretty good, man.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like I said, just deep in it.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_03: Work, man, tired, exhausted, trying to get back back into normalcy, you know, and uh happy to be here with you, fellas.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: Nice how you doing up there, Corey?
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: Fine.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: Sounds good.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'm working a lot too.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: It it gives me chills to hear you talk about working a lot because I feel you.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um it's budget season.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's budget season and then it's tax season for me.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: So we know all about tax season, Sean.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: We do.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: I hope I don't think the listeners need to know too much about it though.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: Ah I begged a different you know, you're not gonna tell me what to say right now.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: This is my time.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, I guess I'll use this time to bitch about the Eagles for a moment.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: Although I've pretty much thrown away all hope anyway, so I don't give a fuck.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: It it is what it is.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: We we you know, we had our glory.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: We did, and it's fine.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta this shit happens.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: But I I do want to say that I think it's like a little extraordinary at this point, okay?
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: Our fucking injury report is damn near the size of our entire roster at this point, right?
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Jalen Hurts was a blood clot.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: This doesn't happen to people, okay?
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: I mean it does, obviously.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: It actually happens more often than you think.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: A lot.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: But like, are you in football?
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: And in all major sports, yeah.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just saying that like all this was happening, right?
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: We're getting fucking all of our starters are injured, and then all of a sudden last week it's like, oh, Jalen Hurts is gonna miss week six.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, what for?
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, and then I open up the article, blood clot.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: Blood clot.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, I I whatever.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_01: They're pretty I mean the thing.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_01: I know they're serious.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: I know they are kind of dangerous, yeah.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm not arguing that.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just saying that like who how the fuck is this happening to us right now?
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: The outrageousness of it.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I obviously hope the best for him and and you know, he'll be alright.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, it's it's scary.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: But and then today, like, for instance, all of our all of our running backs are injured.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: So we we signed fucking Damian Pierce, big dog?
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, didn't we bring up Carson Steele from the uh whatever the fuck, the practice squad?
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: And then he gets injured today.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, that's we're on like our fourth, bro.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: What what's going on?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: What who put a curse on Philly?
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Which one of you motherfuckers finally did it?
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_03: It just happened some years, man.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_02: Some years it's just you guys stink calling the fact that you you guys absolutely deserve it.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to you.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to like every 49ers fans for the last five years season.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, they've been banged.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: And then and then the Flyers, they finally won a game.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: They really stinked season.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: Holy shit, that was bad.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, after such an impressive run at the postseason last year, like out of nowhere, right?
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: It was just this is just wild.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then obviously, you know, the Phillies suck.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like I said earlier, I'm gonna have to get into basketball, and I can't stand those motherfuckers.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: I mean I just I don't even know where to begin with that shit.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, well, the Sixers will have the most eyeballs on them, at least for the beginning part of the season, to see how things turn out.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: I might I might start watching poker on TV.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: I might start watching Texas hold 'em.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_03: You'll just have to you'll have to try to find the nights when they all actually play together and it's not a rest.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_03: That'll be that'll be difficult to find.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: That'll be the hard part.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: That'll be difficult.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_01: That'll be like three times in eight games.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_02: How long until Corey has a uh 76ers jersey?
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I don't think he'll do it.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'll do it just to piss you guys off.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_00: He won't do it.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: He won't do it.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_01: No, he won't do it.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: LeBron.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_01: He won't even watch like other football games if the Eagles aren't playing.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: That's not true.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: I watch football games.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: I try to.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: As long as what do you mean?
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, do you fucking hang out with me every Sunday?
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't see you today.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_03: You need a TV right TV right now, man.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_03: It can make you smile.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_03: The Cowboys still suck.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I mean, at least we can all rejoice in that.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: Two weeks ago, two weeks ago, you were like, I don't even care.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't even watch the game today.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: Your own game.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: You didn't even watch your own game.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, and AJ Brown sucks too.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: That's another thing I rejoice in.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_03: I know the feeling though, Corey.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_03: It's like when your team like sucks, and then you're like, I don't even care.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_03: And then you watch it like, how can we suck more?
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_03: How can we keep sucking more?
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: I don't understand.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_03: How do we suck more?
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, how do we suck more?
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to my entire life.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: No, I was gonna say, like, I got it, I got another couple of things.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: How does it get worse?
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_01: Greg's riding high right now.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_02: We can get we can get lower.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_02: It can go lower.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: You could you could you could run out of time and not realize it like my team did.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: When you're in field goal range.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, sucks.
• 12:53
  unknown: Yeah.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I got another year at least of this before people can start feeling sorry for me.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: I like I said, Super Bowl champs two years ago.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: I don't feel bad.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we're gonna go.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, eventually you guys will feel bad for him.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: No, we won't.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: No, or I'll just give this up all the time.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_01: I love Greg dearly, and I don't ever feel bad for him and the Browns.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I I pray they don't I pray they don't fire him because it doesn't help you guys, but I mean Seriani sucks.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's time for a head coaching change, possibly.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_01: See how the rest of the season pans out.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: In all honesty, if he can get it turned around and you guys make the playoffs, fine, but yeah something is amiss.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: You might and it might be right.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: There and there's been sh like little shades of it all throughout our career with Siriani, but like we also he also has like a great record.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not a good idea.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm not ignoring that.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's that's what I'm saying.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: Like, yeah.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: But anyway, I'm not I know it looks like I know a lot about football guys and all that, but I just don't.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: So um what else?
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: Hold on, what else, Sean?
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_00: Don't don't move on yet.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Hold on.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: No, I'm not.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's still your time, buddy.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's all about you.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: I'm juggling it here.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_00: Where did I oh I went to I went to wherever the hell I went?
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: I went to my my grandmother's funeral, I guess.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Janine's still pissed you weren't there last week, so make amends at some point.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: It usually takes me several years to make an amend.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: So I was in Jersey last week.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I tell you something real quick.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: I did go to my grandmother's funeral and it went off.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: I won't go and it was fine.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: It was it was good to see family and and we honored her and everything.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: I I talked about it when she passed away a few months ago.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: She was 19.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you got drunk in the garage too, didn't you?
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: Um his uncle.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_00: Contemplated-oh, and I ran a bit- Yeah, I almost don't sidetrack him, Dan.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: I know, yeah, yeah.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, I just want to shout out I just want to shout out Greg real quick in the in the bucket shirt over there.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: Dude turned me on to the best fucking sandwich in Philadelphia aside from the cheesesteak.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: And it's John's roast pork.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: It is phenomenal.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: Phenomenal, guys.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta you we we all gotta go to Philly.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: Let's go.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: I know it's your favorite city you've always wanted to be.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: Let's go to Philly, Sean.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: John's roast pork.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: It's great.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_02: It's phenomenal.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_02: The best sandwich I ever had.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's roast pork with fucking cheese and a little spinach on it.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: I mean it's not that it's not that complicated.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's just I don't know.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what's so good about it.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: It's just good.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: I've been doing it for like a hundred years.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, that's what we had.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know why you can't be happy about the things that I'm happy about.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so happy.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_03: You lost me at the spinach.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_02: How long did it take for Keith to embarrass you?
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: Embarrass me?
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think I don't think he embarrassed me.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: He yelled at me once.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: What did he yell at you for?
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: We were arguing about driving in the city.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: I think I'm at the point in my life where I can't have somebody drive me around.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_03: I don't like people driving me around.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_03: No, no chance.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_03: Unless I'm in the backseat, bud.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_02: Actually, Uber.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_02: Lauren drove all weekend on the road trip.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_02: I was a little passenger princess.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_02: I kind of I kind of dug it, dude.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_03: Couldn't do it.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_03: I can't.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_03: I can't.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_03: I'll be a I'll be a mess.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_00: I'll be a mess.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I can't do it anymore.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: I gotta have control at this point.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I want to get one of those driver eds cards with uh with the the steering wheel on the passenger side and the brakes.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_03: And the brakes.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_01: Good stuff.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um, let's see.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_01: What did I do this weekend?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: We went to an all-adult or an adult-only Christmas not Christmas party, Halloween party last night.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I didn't know where that was going.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_02: Was there a lot of furries there?
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: Getting into some weird shit these days.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, they told me I could go anywhere as long as I'm spiritually fit.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_01: So um, off I go.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_01: No, we had our good friends Brian and Brian and Dana, uh, Brian from my recovery group and and his wife, who's also in recovery, who's good friends with Catherine.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: They um they're about to have their second child in like less than two months.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: So they wanted to throw and they bought a new house like a couple months ago, so they wanted to throw like a housewarming slash Halloween party.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_01: Uh no kids, adults only.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_01: It was a lot of fun.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_01: We played uh they did have they did have sober beer pong, which is not anywhere near as fun.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_01: That is fucking gay.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it kind of is it kind of is just play basketball.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_00: It kind of is that's worse than me telling a story about a about a pork sandwich on the podcast.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's all right.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we had like we had like uh I don't know, like iced coffee in there.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was a fun party.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_01: We basically just they had a a crap ton of food, which was really good, and uh, and we watched the uh Miami FSU game and then a bunch of other college games, and it was good.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_01: It was good to hang out, a lot of a lot of people.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: Um and uh that was fun.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: So the kids stayed at my mom's kids stayed at my mom's house, which was nice.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_01: So we we had like an entire night.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's so weird after all these years waking up in the morning to children or like having them wake you up or needing to get up because of them, and then like not having anyone in the house, and like waking up this early this morning, like three different times, like trying to listen and being like, Why is it so quiet out there?
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: Just to remember that they're not here.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_01: So, but it was fun.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_01: We had a blast, and then today played golf with my dad and one of his old college friends, and and um then just went and picked the kids up.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: We had a good time.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: They had a sleepover Friday night at a friend's house.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_01: Both the girls did.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: So we just had the baby Friday, and then uh, you know, they were at my mom's last night.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_01: So good weekend, par for the course.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_00: Was there anything adult about it, or was it just we don't want kids there?
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: We don't want kids.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_01: Pretty much, I mean, it was it was there wasn't anything like everybody appropriate if that's what you're asking, but yeah, I want to know if any of them.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was gonna say, was it there inappropriate women's outfits?
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, there was definitely some of those, like for sure.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I didn't think uh the minions kind of catchy looking at all, or like you get smacked, you know.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_01: It was pretty dark in there.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_01: It was pretty dark.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_01: They went they went all out and and decorated their house like really, really a lot, like big time.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and uh the lights were all dimmed, like the lights were off, and they had like these little basically like red um light bulbs, like like just low.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, they're trying to set that move.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: It was good, dude.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: They did a great job.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_01: But there was um there was a uh a a minion from Despicable Me.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't know minions could be so hot, so we'll just say that.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um there was uh Dog the Bounty Hunter was there, dog dog and Leland.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_01: Our friend uh our my friend John's Big John and him and his wife, they came, they went all out.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like they they got every little like exactly.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_01: I mean it basically so the wife was Leland, if you remember Dog the Bounty Hunter.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_01: She they walked in, and like you immediately knew she was Leland.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_01: Like they she looked exactly, it was wild.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_01: And uh Joe Dirt was there.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_01: We had Joe Dirt, Joe Deerte.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I think I shared.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_01: Did I share on the pod what we were, Catherine and I?
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_01: The the outlet and the plug.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: I was socking it to her all night.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um that was cool.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_01: Huh?
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_01: Nothing.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_03: A burn receptacle.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_01: Um, what was Tommy Lee?
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: Tommy Lee, the rock star, Tommy Lee.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_01: What was his girlfriend's name?
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_01: Pamela Anderson.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: They were there.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_01: And Heather Lockley.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, that was not Tommy and Pam were there.
• 21:02
  unknown: Okay.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: So it was fun.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: It really was.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: They had a great spread.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_01: Dude, talk about um like roast pork.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_01: She's she's Italian and she makes like Italian pulled pork.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like on a hoagie with provolone cheese.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_01: Dude.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we're talking about.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: Phenomenal.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_00: Truly phenomenal.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_01: Is that the same thing you're talking about?
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, essentially.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_01: It was phenomenal.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_01: So I take it back, Corey.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: I apologize.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: She's an Eagles fan.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_01: She is, big time, yes.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: No birds.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: I've heard that.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know who she is, never met her, never seen her, but she's very, very pregnant too.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: So how that happened.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_01: Huh?
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: How'd that happen?
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, you know, immaculate.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_02: At a Halloween party, I believe.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_01: Apparently in Greg's graveyard over there.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_01: Somebody plugged it in.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_01: It was fun.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: We had a good time.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_01: It was nice to have.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, I had like like Quote plans when we got home since we had no kids, and uh I think I was asleep in like 10 minutes by the time we got to do it.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_01: Dude, I we always do that.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't say anything.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_03: We're gonna do this.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: I was so tired, dude.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_01: Like we were we were driving home and it was raining, and I was just like, God, I'm not gonna, I'm fucking done.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_01: I'm done.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_03: Uh dude, that's what I missed last week is because we were literally gonna do it Saturday night, but I was watching the baseball game, and then it was like 11:30, we're gonna watch a movie.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_03: I was out on the couch to just toast it.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_01: It was nice to sleep in a little bit this morning.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: I'll stay up till fucking three.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: Gabby, you ready or what?
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_03: You're also you're also 20 years younger.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_03: Corey sets alarms.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like what do you mean?
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not going to sleep.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_01: Here we go, boys.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_01: Tonight's topic.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_01: Um so we are all either parent, we are all parents, and and I know Greg is a stepfather essentially, but like we are all parents.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_01: He's his dad.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_01: Stop it.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_01: He's a dad, but for the listener's sake, to just and I say that only until we have we each have like different viewpoints on it, is my is my point.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_01: Tori and I have very similar ones.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_01: Dan, you you have, you know, your son's older, he doesn't live with you full time.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, you have Maya, Greg has Peyton.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_01: Um, they're all and all of our kids are getting old enough now where, and I guess maybe this was always the case, no matter how old they were, but I I think I feel like it's more on our minds.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_01: We've talked about it before.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_01: Dan brought it up this morning as a topic.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like, are kids going and spending time at other families' houses?
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: And like what happens if those other parents, I don't know, maybe they party a little hard, maybe they drink too much, maybe you know, like at what point does the way they run their life and the way we want our like who we want our kids to be around?
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like, do we draw the line somewhere?
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_01: Are we asking questions?
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_01: Are we keeping our kids from going over to some of these places because of maybe stories we've heard or the way we've acted?
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_01: And it can be a touchy subject.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to uh I wanna start, um, I want to start with Corey actually.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um, like, have you run into anything like that, Corey, with with any any kids' parents?
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you obviously you don't have to say name names and and stuff like that, but in terms of you know, sending Noah and Lucy to play at friends' houses or sleepovers at parents that are maybe they're not, I don't know.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe you don't agree with their values and their ideals.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_01: Have you had any run-ins and stuff like that?
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: Uh not not really, but I mean there was there was one instance that uh we thought things were pretty good with the specific person that we had watching the kids semi often.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: And then she uh apparently had a schizophrenic break of some kind and claimed to be Jesus Christ not that long after this, and I was like, wow, um was that God's grace that just kept my kids from harm, or what?
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: Because I didn't see this shit coming.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_00: So um you guys you guys know what I'm talking about, maybe not Dan.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_01: We do, no, I think he might too.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_01: We've talked about it.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'll fill Dan in later.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's not that big of a deal at this point, but a couple years past that now.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: But um, that was a weird one.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: That was a weird one.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely trusted that person.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_01: For the most part, like you know, but in all in all fairness, before the mental breakdown, like she was fairly solid.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean like enough, you know, enough for like children's safety was fine.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_01: Right, you're you're good with it.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like, yeah, you're good.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_01: I'll you can watch my kids, yeah.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um and then yeah, that shit got weird.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_01: What's like the threshold, you know, like like if you think about it, I I like I think we all have I have a certain kind of like criteria you have to meet in order to watch my kids, you know, and then it also depends on how long.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like if it's just a quick little like one or two hours, I gotta go to a meeting or I gotta go here, that's a little different.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_01: But then we start talking like, okay, are you gonna you're gonna be feeding my kids or you're gonna like what's what's there's like a criteria, you know?
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_00: God, I think there's so many variables because it depends on the ages of of your kids, right?
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_00: Because at different ages they require different attention as far as feeding goes, right?
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_00: Things like that.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: So that's interesting.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: But I don't I don't know.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know what the threshold is.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: I just know that like I don't know.
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_00: You don't I don't have like a set of spiritual fucking requirements or anything that you know like you just gotta be like I gotta know you're a safe person and that you are relatively responsible too.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: Like you know, the the worst other than the one I was talking about, which nothing bad ever happened, but like the worst encounter we've ever had with like somebody babysitting our kids is like you know, like I I feel like if I was watching like your kid Sean at your house or something, like I'd probably like make sure things were like pretty cleaned up at the end of the night or or whatever it was.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: And like almost everybody always did that for us except like one one other person.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: And it was like great, like she was great otherwise, but it was just like the fu like we knew coming home she wasn't going to do a damn thing, like anything that got taken out, dishes, anything.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_01: That's the worst too, right?
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_00: No, she's a really nice girl.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_02: Filthy, filthy things like that.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_01: That's the worst too, because you're like you get home late, you're tired, you don't want to, and you know you're gonna have to clean everything.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: Well, and it's something that I never thought that I like needed.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: And like me, and and honestly, like in our like little village, like typically we're all doing it for each other, right?
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like, s for the most part, in you know, at least a couple different circumstances.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not like you know, I'm not paying people huge money usually or anything like that.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_00: Like, it's not a requirement, but it's something that I didn't know I had until I had a certain person babysit a few times, and I was like, What the fuck?
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: She does not make sure anything's tidy at all.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: Like nothing, nothing at all.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_00: So not a big deal.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_00: It is what it is, but yeah.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_03: Dan, what about you?
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's different.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, that's as far as a babysitter, like we uh the person we have usually babysit Maya.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, they live two doors down, she's 15, she's in high school.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_03: So, like the stuff that Corey's talking about, I don't expect that at all.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_03: Like, Maya's gonna have a good time with her, they're probably gonna eat a whole bunch of candy and have some sugar, and she'll be up late.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_03: But like, I don't we just it I mean it's for time alone, me and Alyssa, like I don't really care.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_03: It's not it's it's like a special time for Maya though, too.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_03: She loves it, you know.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_03: She's a cheerleader at the high school and they go to the football game sometime.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_03: Like, all the things.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_03: Uh no chance.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_03: No, she knows that.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: No chance.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: Are you sure there's no chance?
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_02: No, I'm not death.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_03: You've ever seen a horror movie in your life.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_03: She's heard me yell.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's definitely not happening.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_03: We live too close.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_03: She's heard echoed.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_04: She's heard me yell.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_00: I was just thinking it'd be super funny if you came home one night and then like knocked over a lamp because you were pissed about the mess or something.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_03: I was there, but it is funny because like, you know, I mean, they don't really there's there's actually there's four daughters that live like two doors down, and they're all like high school age, and then Maya's friend is like six years old uh that lives over there.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_03: But um, you know, one of them's super awesome, super responsible.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_03: The other one couldn't use a microwave.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_03: Like no chance of survival.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_03: Uh we got a door dash food while they're there because food is not happening without that.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_03: And it's like like Corey was just talking about stuff.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_01: But uh then it just becomes like, okay, just the basics, just keep my child safe.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but I'll set everything else up around you to keep them safe and occupied.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, exactly, man.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_03: But uh yeah, babysitting-wise, we never really had to worry about like any safety thing or anything like that.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_03: If it wasn't a babysitter, it was Alyssa's mom.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_03: So we never really had that antidote in it.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_03: But for me, like, you know, we're talking about like thresholds and stuff like that, because I've dealt with a lot of parents that was drinking or that they drink a lot, man.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_03: And a lot of people around here, it's you know, they're 40, but they act like they're 21 still.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_03: You know, you guys know a lot of people like that.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_03: That you know what I mean?
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_03: They just still live to party it up on Friday after work.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_03: We're going to so-and-so's house and the kids are playing, but really it's for the adults to drink.
• 30:25
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_03: It's not that the kids are playing, it's like the adults are getting together to have a good time and stuff, then the kids just sit outside.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_03: And and like I've seen it and heard it all, man, where it's like, you know, they're talking about crazy stuff and the kids can hear them, but they don't think they can because they're inebriated, you know what I mean, and like all that stuff.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_03: But like my threshold really is is watching them with kids, not just their own and other kids.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_03: And you know what I mean?
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_03: And if kids are like loved and feel safer, like I feel like you can tell, you know what I mean?
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_03: Like you can see and tell like that threshold because it's never on me to judge that A, someone might have a problem, that B, they're doing bad things in their life because they're consuming alcohol, they're doing this, or they're smoking weed or whatever.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_03: That's never on me, you know.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_03: And like if I feel that, you know what I mean, like they're helping out and they're doing this and stuff, like I have no issue with it at all.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I have no issue with it at all because it's not on me to but like it's just a it's it's it's really kind of just a judgment call to me.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_03: It's not like it it's really just um you know, that like you said, there's not like a threshold, but I just like you can feel when you feel safe leaving your kids with somebody.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I've had a bunch of other people and we had her with all my random travel and stuff that had a wash, that yeah, they do this and they do that and stuff like that, but like I never doubt it in my mind, you know what I mean, that she was gonna be safe and she was gonna be cared for and loved.
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_03: Because there's that that difference, man.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_03: There's just that difference that like people do set aside, like that they're going to make sure and care for those kids and make sure they're okay no matter what.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever their personal stuff is, their personal stuff is, but they don't let it bleed in, you know.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_03: And and to me, it's just like you can just tell when kids are, you know, I mean, in a bad situation and they're not.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_03: I I really just feel like it's that you can see it and you can feel it.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_01: The the worst is when you you get like other parents gossiping about another set of parents, but you've never experienced it firsthand, but now you have like a bad image in your head about a parent and stuff.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_01: Uh uh, I'll I'll kick it to Greg now.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I was thinking like when you talk, because I have a couple of those scenarios.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_01: Greg, what about you?
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I was gonna say, I mean, we haven't really um well, thankfully, like Lauren's got a huge family, so we haven't really had to like do the whole like pay the babysitter kind of thing because they're just happy to have Peyton, you know, here and there.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_02: So that's pretty cool.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I also hold on.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_01: I also remembered just how much easier it is with only one child.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_01: Once you start throwing multiple kids, it's like, all right, well, and Grace is this way and she's sensitive this way, and now now you got a baby, and Sophia's pretty good, but anyways, go ahead.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_02: Um the I would say the the biggest worry we would have, like, when we do uh get to the age of uh babysitting, if if that ever happens, um would be like because he's a charmer, right?
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_02: So he he'd be like, Oh, well, this is usually the time my mom takes me out for ice cream or something or uh this is my my mom lets me you know takes me to the arcade all the time, you know, like sir or something like that, just just to like get his way, you know what I'm saying?
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_02: I think that that would be uh the worst of of our worries and concerns.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um but yeah, as far as like and he he hasn't had any uh real sleepovers yet either, like at friends' houses.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_02: I I don't think he's we're we're not quite at that age.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_02: If if kids nowadays even still do that, I don't know.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_02: I mean that was a big kid, but my kids do.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they do, man.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_03: And then that's what Maya asked for like forever, dude.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_03: It's like that's that's that's a de that's a whole nother branch of treatment.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so Sophia's at the age where she would she would much rather spend the night over somebody else's house all the time than have somebody spend the night at her house.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I I'd I'd rather Which I get because I used to be that way too.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, uh her first sleepover, you get so nervous.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, please don't be a jerk, please don't be a jerk, please don't be a jerk.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but I mean it's it's it's cool.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_02: The the big thing that we you know when he goes over to friends' houses for uh an extended period of time or whatever, is you know, we're always obviously with him, it's you know, make sure he's mine in his manners.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_02: Did you say thank you?
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_02: Did you say please?
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_02: That kind of stuff.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: Um but the the big thing I think with with any of your kids, man, is you just have to um reassure them that it's an open door policy as far as communication is concerned.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_02: Talk to them about you know, hey, uh you can tell me anything, anything weird, anything anything that anybody says to you that's hurtful, anything that you see.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_02: The kid has been to enough weddings and and around enough stuff, like he knows what people look like when they're drunk.
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_02: You know, he thinks it, you know, like he he actually uh at the wedding we were at the other night, he he came running up and he's like, Mom, the that that lady over there, she's really drunk.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_02: You see her on the dance, like you know, like laughing about it or whatever, but um you know, yeah, yeah, like I said, it's just it's it's just uh making sure that line of communication is open, that they know that they're not gonna get in trouble for coming and telling her or myself anything, you know, and and just um keeping it above board like that, I guess.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, real quick before we move on, I just want to Greg already said it, like you know, they got family and stuff, so whatever.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_00: I got my mom down here now, so I'm not every babysitter as long as I possibly can.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_00: But like what what what are the rates, guys?
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_00: That because I did pay a babysitter this year, and I I know what what rate I paid, but can we take a quick around a little poll?
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_00: He got swindled.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_02: He got swindled, that's why he's asking.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_01: I would say I'm I'm super fortunate.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_01: We are super fortunate because our babysitter has we've literally known them forever, and they're like a second set of grandparents, and we pay them like dirt cheap.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm talking like$25 a kid for like the day.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_01: Like, and I well, all right, hold on.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_01: Let me let me let me rephrase that.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_01: So the bait I'll just do current.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_01: So uh shout out to Jackie and Randy, they are awesome.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_01: They're like a us, we know them from recovery, they're both sober a long time.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_01: They are literally like a second, a third set of grandparents, however you want to say it.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um they watched Sophia when she was an infant and growing up, Grace, and then now the baby is so like currently the baby goes over there Thursday and Friday, and it's from like 10 to like four or five on Thursday, and like 11 to 4 or 5 on Friday, and 25 bucks a day.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_01: Just like they they she probably wouldn't even she probably would be okay if we didn't, but we've always we always have given her just the same rates, it's been the same for Sophia, for Grace.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_01: On like a random Sunday, sometimes all three kids will go over there and we give her 75 bucks, 25, 25 a kid.
• 37:20
  SPEAKER_01: But again, it's from like noon to five.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like crazy amounts, you know, it's it's never usually, you know, full every now and then if I have to work early, I'll drop the baby off or whoever off at like 9 a.m.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_01: And Catherine will just try to get there a little earlier than she normally does, so it's not a completely full day.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_01: And I recognize that we are very, very fortunate with that.
• 37:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um, they are awesome.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_01: Talking about like keeping kids safe, and not only I don't even know how to like accurately describe it, how grateful we are to them.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_01: They are awesome people.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_01: Uh she was like she was an actual nanny growing up.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: That's what she was.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: She had like three, she was like also a dental hygienist and did something in finance, but she never had kids.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um, she's got like sisters and like you know, nephews and nieces and stuff and friends, but so she's been around, but she was a nanny growing up.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_01: And she was like a um a college swimmer and almost an Olympian, Olympic swimmer.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: So she's taught all the kids how to swim.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_01: They have a pool, you know, like they're just like they do all kinds of stuff.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_01: Randy, like, will take Sophia surfing and take them, you know, I don't know.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_01: They're just they're just really awesome.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_01: We're we're super fortunate with them.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I never I've never taken it for granted or or like not made it a point like around the holidays or just special times to just like give them like a gift card somewhere or just a car, just all that stuff.
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_01: So we're a little fortunate with that.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_01: I will say to Dan, to your point about like the 15-year-old high school girl in the neighborhood, I think that rate's a little higher.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_01: And I I've always um like 20 bucks an hour is like standard kind of.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, bare minimum is 15.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_03: Usually yeah, usually we do like uh when I went away for the four days, she watched she had to because Alyssa was still working nights, so she had to pick her up from aftercare at six and until Alyssa got out at 11 30, so it was like six hours a day.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_03: So whatever six twelve is that's twenty-four hours, and I gave her four hundred bucks.
• 39:18
  SPEAKER_03: So it was like seventeen bucks an hour or something like that.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I we the last time I did it was for I think for Valentine's Day, and uh we had a girl um from Lucy's dance school who I guess must be seventeen or eighteen now.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_00: She was driving, so whatever.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_00: But she's you know in high school and um we paid her twenty bucks an hour.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_00: And uh I just remember thinking like fuck this is uh I mean we're about to go to Russia.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_00: This is an expense.
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_00: Like I could start I could start a second podcast for this fucking money or an infrastructure business.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, infrastructure business.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, it's just funny how like you back in you know what I mean, back in our day, fucking ten bucks an hour was a lot.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_01: Bro, I remember when I got sober in 2011 and I finally got my job at Sand Hill Cove, it was ten dollars an hour part-time, and I was stoked.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_01: I was just like, oh my god, like a steady paycheck.
• 40:18
  SPEAKER_01: Like that's yeah, like$300 a week.
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like I remember doing the math, you know, like Harbor Freight was$950 when I worked there.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_00: I think bowling alley was bowling alley was$950, and I was like, Yes, I get to move into Jimmy's halfway house.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_00: I can pay the rent.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_03: If I made$9.50 now, we'd all be homeless.
• 40:35
  SPEAKER_03: All homeless.
• 40:36
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, dude.
• 40:38
  SPEAKER_00: No eggs.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_00: No eggs for no eggs.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_03: Bro, I'd be at a scooter, I'd be scooting.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 40:44
  SPEAKER_01: So uh so take it back to like the so we have um we got a good community here.
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like we got we got some a lot of friends, and and the kids are at their age, especially Sophia's at an age now where she's got like friends and you know, she's over then and never had any issues, but it's something I don't know, man, and and maybe it's like the just today's day and age, there's so much info out there and so many like bad stories you hear.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_01: So like it's obviously something I think about and and and you know caution against.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember a while back, it's not not nothing recent, um, and and it turned out to be nothing, but there was a uh a friend that that the girls had, and another one of the parents in the community I remember is you know, she's kind of a little bit of a gossip and and and um just a little bit of like, oh my god, did you hear what happened, you know, and kind of like unnecessary.
• 41:40
  SPEAKER_01: You guys know I've I've I've worked very hard over the years to kind of like stay out of all that stuff, and as I know you guys do too, for the most part.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but she was like, Oh, so and so's father is an alcoholic, and um oh, and and he tried to hit on me once, like in front of other parents and stuff like that.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_01: And I honestly, this lady's very sweet.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_01: It totally could be like not true, you know what I mean?
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: It could totally be one of those it or and or maybe it did happen.
• 42:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like I and I because I I I see I know the guy, I've seen him before.
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_01: He is a little weird and a little quirky, but I've had like good conversations with him.
• 42:17
  SPEAKER_01: He um, you know, um, but it is something that I was it's kind of like, damn it, now I'm like aware of this information, and I have to like just kind of keep an eye out for it, you know what I mean?
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_01: And not that I I wouldn't want to know that information if it was actually true, and I don't think it is, uh or at least if it is, there's nothing to like I've never had any really cause to be concerned when Sophia um or Grace is like over this person's house playing, but it was one of those things like because this other mom said something, now I'm aware of it, and now like every time I see this guy, uh I kind of like am like paying extra close attention, which I don't really love, but I also think it's kind of like part of the job of being a dad, too.
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_01: Like because uh you know, yeah.
• 43:05
  SPEAKER_00: Hold on, back up.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: What's the trouble here exactly?
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_00: This dude hit on a mom.
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_01: I the this this mom told me that the dad's an alcoholic.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_01: And basically basically was saying, like, oh, I wouldn't let my kid over there because the dad drinks too much.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_01: That's exactly what she said.
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_01: She didn't say alcohol, she said he drinks too much, and oh, and he tried to hit on me once at a school event.
• 43:29
  SPEAKER_01: Most women would be like, Oh, that's a high compliment.
• 43:31
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 43:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, right.
• 43:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's what I was saying, like, that's it sounds like he's a fucking like he's married though, I guess, is the issue.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, which is like at a school event and and all that.
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_01: So it was like, and I was and you know, me, I'm just like, oh wow, that's that's crazy, you know, wild.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_01: Oh but um, but once I was aware of that, it's like now I'm I have I have to like keep an eye out for it.
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_01: I'm almost like kind of judging the guy, even though I'm I'm not and I'm trying to Really see him who for who he is, I have to pay attention to it.
• 44:03
  SPEAKER_01: It's part of the job of being a dad.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_01: I gotta make sure my kids are safe.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_01: And if there's any kind of like you know, whatever.
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_01: And to I haven't seen anything, I haven't heard anything.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I will say that that family, while the kids have been over there multiple times and nothing's ever happened, they probably are a little like I don't know, fast and loose is probably not the right term, but just uh you know, like the kids probably have a little more freedom to roam about the cabin, so to speak, when they're over that house than maybe at other houses, if that makes any sense.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_01: But at the same time, like we let the girls go down to the park, which is like you go like a hundred yards down our street and then you cut over it.
• 44:43
  SPEAKER_01: Now, if I walk to the end of my street, I can see the park, so it's not that far, but they are out of our sight, you know.
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like we let them take their bikes and go with a group of friends and stuff like that.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_01: Sophia knows not to let Grace out of her sight, and you know, and it's a pretty safe place, but so I don't know, it's just a weird like kind of place we're in.
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_01: They're getting older and it's something that you got to keep an eye on, you know.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, what what I'll tell you one thing, man.
• 45:05
  SPEAKER_03: That's the like I honestly, like, you know, like was alcohol or any of that stuff.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, dude, that stuff is so normal.
• 45:10
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I grew up with an alcoholic father.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I've never, you know, my dad was very good to me.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_03: He was he was an alcoholic, yes.
• 45:16
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 45:17
  SPEAKER_03: But I never felt like I was in super harm's way.
• 45:19
  SPEAKER_03: It happens all the time, it's all over the place.
• 45:21
  SPEAKER_03: I've seen parents pick up their kids, they were probably drunk at the time, they drive drunk all the time.
• 45:26
  SPEAKER_03: All right, you know what I mean?
• 45:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's that I mean they do though, you know what I mean?
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_03: I agree.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like it's funny.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_01: My mind goes to the world, my mind goes to people like us, though.
• 45:33
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 45:34
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I automatically think of someone like me is the problem, and I and I agree with you, Dan.
• 45:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I 100% agree.
• 45:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's very common and stuff like that.
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_03: It's just no, but well, so uh what I'm getting to is that what scares me more than anything is these freaking creep guys that like little kids.
• 45:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, right, because this is not a thing of Uncle Petey in his mom's basement on a computer anymore.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 45:59
  SPEAKER_03: This is the guy that coaches the basketball team that has four.
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I was getting at.
• 46:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that yeah, that I mean that's that's my you know what I mean.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like honestly, like the I'll call him.
• 46:08
  SPEAKER_03: We can spot they look like a normal person, they look like a stand-up human being.
• 46:11
  SPEAKER_03: We can spot the other stuff a mile away, right?
• 46:14
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 46:14
  SPEAKER_03: Like, that's my thing, is that like that's not you're not hiding from it, you know, when it's when it comes to us, anyways.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 46:20
  SPEAKER_03: Like we keep an eye on it.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_03: But uh, we just had uh a guy that a guy that was a uh basketball, he was a uh basketball coach for uh I think fifth grade, man.
• 46:30
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 46:31
  SPEAKER_03: And his house got raided by the FBI because he had all kind of all this stuff on his phone and all this stuff, and he's got four kids.
• 46:38
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 46:39
  SPEAKER_03: Like under, you know, kids and yeah, and and and you know, God bless the uh prison system because he went to prison and or he went to the jail, the holding facility for court to get uh transferred, and one day there and they uh they beat him half to death and he's sitting in the hospital right now, you know, fighting for his life, you know.
• 46:57
  SPEAKER_03: But I mean like and that's that's three times in the last couple of years that someone's been arrested for that in our community.
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_03: And that's what scares me more than anything is that because you just can't you know what I mean?
• 47:08
  SPEAKER_03: Everyone's like, oh, he was a great basketball coach, and he you know what I mean, and that that stuff is like, yeah, that that stuff's really scary stuff, yeah.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_03: I agree.
• 47:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's the you know, that's the stuff I worry about at the park.
• 47:20
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like that's the that's uh you know, why is this old guy watching us practice softball right now?
• 47:26
  SPEAKER_01: Well, and that's and that's like you know, you teach your kids, and and obviously it's like, hey, you don't you're gonna go with your friends, like you don't talk to anybody, you don't, you know, like and you you don't go over near anybody, you know, stuff like that.
• 47:38
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's uh it's but it's like that fine line of allowing them to be kids and having a little freedom with you know.
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um now I will say when they are down there, Sophia has a watch.
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_01: We got her a watch for yeah, I love those.
• 47:53
  SPEAKER_01: And and it's like, hey, you have like 30 minutes down there, you know, and and I and I will go walk down to the end of the street at least once every you know 20, 15, 30 minutes and just like peek around.
• 48:05
  SPEAKER_01: I can see I said I can see down there.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but yeah, I agree, Dan.
• 48:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like that is the you you never truly know nowadays, and you really yeah, you just never know.
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_01: And that's the thing, like these people seem normal and they seem like they're charismatic to your point.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_01: They're not they're not they don't look creepy anymore.
• 48:21
  SPEAKER_01: They're like charismatic and they're the coach of the basketball team or the PE teacher or um, you know, uh fucking congressman.
• 48:30
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know, something that's the weird that's the part.
• 48:33
  SPEAKER_00: This is why I'm a helicopter dad, dude.
• 48:35
  SPEAKER_00: And I and I try not to make it like I try not to like impose on my kids' lives, right?
• 48:39
  SPEAKER_00: I try to let them still be independent and stuff, but I and we're and I don't think we're either one of us is wrong, Sean.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_00: Here I don't know that I would even do that.
• 48:50
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if I would let them go down the street like that without I know I know and I don't and like on one hand like I kinda wish that I would, right?
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_00: I mean gre I'm not set up for it here anyway, but I kind of wish I was more like that.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_01: But on the other hand PSL doesn't have any parks, so you're fine.
• 49:05
  SPEAKER_00: PSL doesn't have any joy at all, but um I fucking hate it here, but uh but no, but we're at actually fitting fittingly so we drove all the way to Stewart today for a fall festival.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and it was a great time.
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it was just me because Gabby was at work and I had both the kids and for the most part I let them like run around a little bit, but I was not far behind at all times.
• 49:31
  SPEAKER_00: And the one time like Lucy like was a good distance from me and like she kind of disappeared behind something, and I th and I didn't like immediately I don't get like stricken with fear or anything necessarily, but but I you know, but I'm consciously aware of like okay, this is how that shit happens though, is like they're out of your sight for too long and then they're like you don't know.
• 49:53
  SPEAKER_01: I will say public events, um public events I like that.
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_01: I will not they can they can roam, but I have to be able to see you.
• 50:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in the sniper tower, and I 100% I give them landmarks like hey, you see those like trash cans and recycling bins over here, you cannot go past that.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_01: Like you stay on this side here's here's here's where daddy hid the assault rifle.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 50:16
  SPEAKER_01: But Corey, I I I fully agree.
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I it took me, man, I was I was nervous the first two times I let them ride their bike.
• 50:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um and if you saw it, if you saw the setup, you might be like, oh, that's not too bad.
• 50:28
  SPEAKER_01: Because there's a yeah, yeah, there's a at the at because literally our kids, the elementary school is at the end of like the end of our street, a hundred yards down the road is the entrance to the school.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_01: So it is a school ground, and they have the track, you know, around the track and field, and then right next to it is like the the racquetball court, and then the park is right there, and the baseball fields, and there's a there's a boys and girls club right there.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but that again that doesn't that doesn't automatically mean like automatic safety, but I I it took me a while, like it it took me a few times to let them do it, and I would walk down and check multiple times until I could see that Sophia was actually being responsible and like making sure Grace never like even to the point they use the bathrooms at the baseball field, which is like a hundred feet to the to the left, and Sophia knows like she takes Grace by the hand to the bathroom if Grace has to go or something like that, you know.
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_01: So it's but I I'm with you, man.
• 51:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's uh it is that fine line of like allowing your kids to kind of explore and have that freedom as opposed to and it's kind of funny because in the same at the same time, I'm pretty sure I used to disappear all the time, yeah.
• 51:42
  SPEAKER_01: All the time, man.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I would be miles away from my house on my bike with my boys, miles away with no communication, no chance, nothing.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_01: No GPS, no nothing, nothing, nothing.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_01: And I just maybe there's like a potentially maybe that's like the difference between girls and boys, I don't know, but but yeah, I I and and you know, oddly enough, I started like smoking weed at age 13, so maybe like there was something there, but um, but I didn't get fondled by anybody I know that much.
• 52:11
  SPEAKER_00: At 13, I was disappearing for fucking days.
• 52:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean, like, yeah, yeah, but at like 10, I was just gone all day, you know.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, right.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_03: I think uh what helped me make it make me feel better about it.
• 52:22
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know if you did this, Sean, and stuff like that, but I I like gave her markers to prove trust.
• 52:27
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_03: Like, hey, I need you back at XXX on the dot.
• 52:31
  SPEAKER_03: And she came home and she was running home to make sure she's home at that time.
• 52:35
  SPEAKER_01: That's that's what we that's what we do with the watch.
• 52:37
  SPEAKER_01: And okay, yeah, yeah.
• 52:38
  SPEAKER_01: And Sophia, and I will the she will be in trouble if she's late, you know what I mean?
• 52:42
  SPEAKER_01: Like 100%.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yep, yeah, because that that made me feel a lot better about it.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_03: Because I was the same way, man.
• 52:47
  SPEAKER_03: We have the same setup where it's literally three blocks, you know what I mean, like four houses down, the the playground and all that stuff in the school, and I could see it from my house.
• 52:55
  SPEAKER_03: But uh, it's it's the same, you know what I mean.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_03: But like uh she sh her independence and her proving that she was trustworthy made me feel better about it.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and like our street itself, there's a handful of other kids.
• 53:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm just trying to think, like they're good, and all the parents kind of we all kind of know, like, oh hey, they're they're in they're playing in the street, they're out front of my house, but then they're gonna go to the swing set behind Benji's house over here, and like they all kind of keep an eye out, you know, for each other that way, which is which is good.
• 53:25
  SPEAKER_01: So it's interesting, man.
• 53:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's um Corey, you'll you'll uh b both of you, Dan, you know, how old's Maya now?
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_01: Eight?
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_01: Nine.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_01: Nine.
• 53:36
  SPEAKER_01: You're getting I will say that so far this year, like Sophia, ten years old, fifth grade, middle school next year.
• 53:44
  SPEAKER_01: Like there's there's an extra layer of just her growing up that I'm fully aware of, and it's uh, you know, um I don't know if I like it.
• 53:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, no, yeah.
• 53:57
  SPEAKER_03: It's gonna be girls is so much different, man.
• 54:00
  SPEAKER_01: Greg, were you saying like Peyton doesn't he doesn't really do sleepovers yet?
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_01: How old is he?
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_01: Eight not yet.
• 54:04
  SPEAKER_02: No, he's he's nine.
• 54:06
  SPEAKER_01: Nine?
• 54:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 54:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's been brought up a couple times.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_02: It's just uh you know, plans fell through and stuff like that.
• 54:12
  SPEAKER_01: But is is Lauren a little like uh hesitant about that only child kind of thing, or or is she kind of like let's get him out there?
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_02: No, I mean we we definitely like get him out there as far as that's concerned.
• 54:26
  SPEAKER_02: I think it's just I don't know, like things are it's it's a it just seems like a different time, you know.
• 54:32
  SPEAKER_02: It like back when back when we were that age, it was like, yeah, let me get out on this bike and let me go play with my friends outside.
• 54:41
  SPEAKER_02: And there we do have like there's there's um a couple families up the street, like he'll he'll go and play over at their house where they they have like three boys over there, he'll go play over there and stuff like that.
• 54:51
  SPEAKER_02: But I don't know, it it just seems like like sleepovers, it just hasn't been brought into the conversation yet.
• 54:59
  SPEAKER_02: Um uh and it yeah, it it just feels different than it did during our childhood, where it was like yeah, I was I had to get I had to be home by the time the street lights came on or I was in trouble type deal.
• 55:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah um so yeah, but uh again, with with all that and with all the weird shit too, and the weird people that are out there again, that's why I just emphasize more and more to him, especially because like being somebody that had um you know circumstances and shit that happened to me when I was a kid, you know what I'm saying?
• 55:32
  SPEAKER_02: Like that is all the more reason you have to have that conversation.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_02: Like, hey, if somebody ever does something to you that makes you feel sad, makes you feel angry, if somebody ever, yeah, it's it touches you, what whatever.
• 55:45
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't matter, you're not in trouble.
• 55:47
  SPEAKER_02: You can always talk to me about anything, and that's what we do with him, you know.
• 55:51
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and and we we tell him all the time, it doesn't matter if it's a fan, doesn't matter who it is, you come talk to us, you know, and let us know what's going on.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_02: Because I think that that's the big thing is those those kind of people get good at hiding their stuff because they're manipulative, you know.
• 56:07
  SPEAKER_02: And and so you know, you you have to let the kids know that you have an open line of communication.
• 56:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you gotta go over there and shake his hand, look him in the eye, and be like, oh, I see you, buddy.
• 56:18
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 56:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 56:21
  SPEAKER_01: Good stuff, boys.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_01: That's maybe not always the most glamorous of conversations, but a a necessary one for us as fathers.
• 56:27
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, I've been telling I said this sucked.
• 56:30
  SPEAKER_00: I've been telling Gabby though.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_00: I've been I've been telling Gabby for a while now that like you know, we're all getting older, right?
• 56:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like all of a sudden we're all you guys are in your fucking 50s or something.
• 56:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm approaching 60.
• 56:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I I just feel like we should all get together we should have sleepovers.
• 56:49
  SPEAKER_00: We should have adult sleepovers.
• 56:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's kind of what you got into last night, Sean.
• 56:53
  SPEAKER_00: That's exactly what I did last night.
• 56:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's basically what happened, I guess.
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_00: But we get some sleeping bags, yeah.
• 56:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, the minions.
• 56:59
  SPEAKER_00: We should get some popcorn.
• 57:01
  SPEAKER_01: You know what's funny is she was a cop too.
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_01: She was a Palm Beach County Sheriff, the min the minion, the hot minion.
• 57:06
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, really?
• 57:08
  SPEAKER_01: Did you do a deep dive on her?
• 57:10
  SPEAKER_01: How'd you know that?
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, she was she was she was talking about it.
• 57:14
  SPEAKER_01: She was talking about it.
• 57:16
  SPEAKER_01: She was talking about it.
• 57:17
  SPEAKER_01: I you know what the crazy part on social media is that what PSD is?
• 57:21
  SPEAKER_01: You know what the crazy part is?
• 57:23
  SPEAKER_01: Is that it was so dark in there, I'm not even officially sure if she was hot.
• 57:28
  SPEAKER_01: That's crazy.
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_01: That's amazing.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_01: I think she was.
• 57:32
  SPEAKER_01: It's damn dark in here.
• 57:35
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 57:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm down, bro.
• 57:39
  SPEAKER_03: I'll play Madden all night.
• 57:41
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you ever think about okay, guys?
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_01: Corey, we do.
• 57:43
  SPEAKER_01: It's called a spiritual retreat.
• 57:45
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's insane.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we don't do it anymore, so don't worry about it.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_01: Well, we're about to.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_01: We're bringing it back.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_01: It's coming back, Dan.
• 57:51
  SPEAKER_01: Next October, boys.
• 57:53
  SPEAKER_01: Where are we going?
• 57:55
  SPEAKER_01: We're going same area, different campgrounds, same area.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's in the works.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 57:59
  SPEAKER_01: In all seriousness.
• 58:00
  SPEAKER_03: Details to come, I promise.
• 58:02
  SPEAKER_03: Who was the food guy?
• 58:03
  SPEAKER_03: What's his name?
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_03: We need old uh oh man, what was his name?
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_03: Remember that dude, the big dude?
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_03: Which one?
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_03: Joe Lenderman?
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_03: No, no, the big guy at the uh the food hall.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god, I can't remember his name, dude.
• 58:15
  SPEAKER_03: You don't remember the big guy that was serving out the food?
• 58:18
  SPEAKER_03: No, he was uh he was always there, man.
• 58:20
  SPEAKER_03: What's his I can't think of his name.
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_03: He was always there every year.
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_03: I can't remember.
• 58:25
  SPEAKER_03: I don't remember.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_03: I guess that's smoking.
• 58:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's in the works.
• 58:29
  SPEAKER_01: One Kyle J.
• 58:30
  SPEAKER_01: Fiskus is taking the lead on it, but but Corey and I uh Corey and I are helping.
• 58:34
  SPEAKER_01: He's doing a good job.
• 58:36
  SPEAKER_01: No, he's doing a good job.
• 58:37
  SPEAKER_03: He's doing 46,000.
• 58:39
  SPEAKER_03: He's gonna pocket 45 of it.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_03: He's gonna run insurance cards.
• 58:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's that's start saving now.
• 58:48
  SPEAKER_01: He's been doing good.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_01: He employed a healthy committee, so yeah.
• 58:52
  SPEAKER_01: And he's given us he's given us uh authority, not over him, but like equal authority with him.
• 58:59
  SPEAKER_00: So that'll be fun.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm just but I'm just saying, if you think about it, guys, this is I mean, this is probably land the plane type territory, but if you think about it, we I don't give a shit.
• 59:09
  SPEAKER_00: We're going all night.
• 59:12
  SPEAKER_00: If you think about it, we all stopped doing those things at one point.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_00: We all had our last sleepover, right?
• 59:17
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, aside from like halfway house.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_00: I mean that's kind of that came back at us with the halfway house scenarios.
• 59:22
  SPEAKER_01: But remember when you slept over a girl's house?
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_01: Like those were fun.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_01: Snuck into a girl's house and treatment.
• 59:30
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that too.
• 59:31
  SPEAKER_01: God, I got I got store, I got some stories about those.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_00: Remember uh, yeah.
• 59:37
  SPEAKER_00: Well, remember when the tech would come by and then I see you running.
• 59:42
  SPEAKER_00: Why are you running?
• 59:43
  SPEAKER_00: I see you.
• 59:44
  SPEAKER_01: We gotta land the plane.
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna land the plane, Corey.
• 59:48
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, I need a Wind Disney trip.
• 59:50
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't do anything.
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_01: Shout out to our listeners.
• 59:52
  SPEAKER_01: Please like, follow, and share on all socials at Trud Report Pod.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_01: Uh email us, TrudReportPod at yahoo.com.
• 59:59
  SPEAKER_01: Uh send in mailbag requests for topics, questions, and comments to any of these handles.
• 1:00:05
  SPEAKER_01: Remember, we are all here.
• 1:00:06
  SPEAKER_01: If anyone wants to talk about recovery, our experiences, or if you're struggling with some form of addiction, um, just want to, again, quick shout out to last week's episode.
• 1:00:15
  SPEAKER_01: Janine was awesome, and she gave um great hope for those struggling with any type of eating disorder or anything like that, and resources and where to get help.
• 1:00:25
  SPEAKER_01: But if you need more of those or you're not sure where to go, uh please reach out to us.
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_01: We'll put you in contact in the right direction.
• 1:00:33
  SPEAKER_01: Good night.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_01: God bless.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_01: May you trudge the road of happy destiny.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_01: Sleep over at Corey's house next Friday.
• 1:00:39
  SPEAKER_01: Fucking good.
• 1:00:40
  SPEAKER_01: Peace.