Latest / I Am Astrology Readings Podcast with Paul Heath / Trust: The Foundation of Connection - Part One

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Trust: The Foundation of Connection - Part One · I Am Astrology Readings Podcast with Paul Heath

• 0:07
  Welcome back.
• 0:08
  Or if this is your first time here, welcome.
• 0:12
  Take a deep breath with me real quick in your nose and out of your mouth.
• 0:21
  Because what we're getting in today, lives deep in all of us.
• 0:27
  Something that was shaped long before we even had words for it.
• 0:31
  Today we're talking about trust.
• 0:35
  Not the surface level kind, not the can I trust you with a secret kind.
• 0:41
  I'm talking about the kind of trust that either got broken or it was built in the very first place you ever called home.
• 0:49
  But before we get into that, I want to give you a number to hold onto throughout this entire episode.
• 0:57
  The number 2.
• 0:58
  2 is the number of duality, of relationship, of the self in connection with another.
• 1:06
  Two carries the energy of sensitivity, of emotion, of the deep need to belong.
• 1:12
  But two also carries the shadow side.
• 1:15
  Fear of abandonment, codependency, and the inability to stand alone.
• 1:21
  Everything we're going to talk about today lives in the energy of two.
• 1:25
  Because trust, real trust, only exist in the space between people.
• 1:31
  And something happened in that space.
• 1:33
  Something that changed everything.
• 1:35
  This is part one of a three part series, Trust and Judgment.
• 1:40
  A spiritual journey to healing, discernment and self trust.
• 1:46
  Let me start here.
• 1:47
  Trust is not something you are born with or born without.
• 1:51
  Trust is learned.
• 1:53
  It is shaped by your experiences, your situations, the environment you were placed in, the environment you did not choose.
• 2:02
  Now, in numerology, your life begins on the influence of your birth number, the vibration you came into this world carrying.
• 2:10
  But here's what people don't talk about.
• 2:12
  Enough.
• 2:13
  That birth vibration, that divine blueprint, can get interrupted.
• 2:20
  And one of the earliest interruptions happens in the home.
• 2:24
  Every interaction you had as a child was either a deposit or a withdrawal.
• 2:31
  Every time someone showed up for you that was in alignment with your highest number, a deposit.
• 2:39
  Every time someone let you down, betrayed you, left you, or hurt you, that was a distortion, a disruption of the frequency you were born to carry.
• 2:50
  Withdrawal.
• 2:51
  And some of us had frequencies disrupted way before we were old enough to even know we had one.
• 2:58
  Now, where does that disruption begin?
• 3:01
  It starts in the home.
• 3:03
  The number one in numerology is the number of self, of origin, of the individual standing in their own power.
• 3:12
  Before you can get the two, before you can trust in the relationship, you have to be rooted in one.
• 3:19
  You have to know who you are.
• 3:21
  But think about a young boy or girl who was molested.
• 3:25
  That is just not a physical violation.
• 3:29
  That's also a spiritual one.
• 3:31
  That is an attack on the one, on the self, on the sacred individual, on the soul that came Here with the divine assignment.
• 3:41
  And when that happens, when the body was supposed to be a sacred vessel, is treated like it isn't.
• 3:47
  It doesn't just warm the child, it collapses.
• 3:51
  The one, the sense of self, the inner knowing that says, I am worthy, I am safe, I belong to myself.
• 4:01
  And when the one collapses, the two becomes distorted.
• 4:05
  The connection to others become rooted not in wholeness, but in fear.
• 4:10
  That child grows up carrying resentment toward every guardian figure in their life.
• 4:15
  Because in their spirit, they're carrying a question they may have never said out loud.
• 4:21
  Where were you when I needed you most?
• 4:24
  Why didn't you protect me?
• 4:26
  And that resentment doesn't stay in the past.
• 4:28
  It lives in the body.
• 4:30
  It lives in the spirit.
• 4:32
  It lives in every two energy relationship they ever enter until it gets healed.
• 4:37
  Now let's talk about something people use as a punchline.
• 4:41
  Mommy issues, daddy issues.
• 4:44
  That is real trauma.
• 4:45
  And in numerology, here's why it runs so deep.
• 4:49
  The number 4 is the number of foundation, structure, home, stability.
• 4:55
  Your parents, your parents, your family unit are your original four energy.
• 5:03
  There is supposed to be the stable ground you build everything else on.
• 5:08
  But what happens when the 4 is broken?
• 5:11
  When the foundation cracks before you even learn how to walk on it?
• 5:16
  Say your father left you when you were young, or your mother wasn't emotionally available, you grew up not knowing what it feel like to have that consistent unconditional love and that broken for that unstable foundation becomes the blueprint
• 5:35
  for every structure you try to build after it.
• 5:38
  So now you're an adult.
• 5:40
  You get into a relationship, and every time someone gets close, something in you gets activated.
• 5:48
  Something starts watching for the exit.
• 5:51
  Something starts waiting for the betrayal.
• 5:54
  Because your 4 was never solid and you've been unconsciously trying to recreate it or protect yourself from it in every relationship sense.
• 6:04
  So what do you do?
• 6:06
  You build a wall.
• 6:08
  You push people away before they can leave on their own.
• 6:10
  You reject the two energy, the connection, the vulnerability, the belonging.
• 6:17
  Because last time you trusted that foundation, it gave way beneath you.
• 6:22
  But here's the spiritual truth.
• 6:24
  You cannot build a new structure on an unacknowledged, broken foundation.
• 6:29
  You have to go back, not to relive it, but to heal it.
• 6:33
  In numerology, the 6 is the number of love, nurturing, responsibility, and healing of the home.
• 6:42
  Six is the number that says, I can create the family, the safety, the love that I was never given.
• 6:49
  But you cannot access the six.
• 6:52
  You cannot give or receive that kind of love if you're still operating from a wounded two or A broken four.
• 7:05
  This is where the vulnerability comes in.
• 7:07
  And I know some of you tense up at the word.
• 7:10
  Why would I be vulnerable?
• 7:12
  Every time I opened up, I got hurt.
• 7:15
  I hear you, but vulnerability is not weakness.
• 7:18
  In the language of numbers, vulnerability is the bridge number.
• 7:23
  It is the five.
• 7:25
  Five is the number of change, freedom, and the courage to move on.
• 7:30
  You cannot get from where you are to where you were meant to be without crossing the five, without doing something uncomfortable, without opening even just a little.
• 7:42
  Vulnerability is your 5 energy.
• 7:44
  It is the passage between the pain of yourself and the peace of your future.
• 7:50
  And here's the truth that ties everything together.
• 7:53
  You cannot trust others if you do not trust yourself.
• 7:56
  That is the One.
• 7:57
  Speaking before the two.
• 8:00
  Before the relationship, there has to be the one.
• 8:04
  Before you can trust anyone else, you have to come back to yourself.
• 8:09
  So before we close part one, I want to ask you something, and I want you to sit with it like it's the most important question you've been asked all year.
• 8:19
  Because it might be.
• 8:22
  What don't you trust about yourself?
• 8:25
  When you reduce any question about self back to its core, you always land on the one.
• 8:32
  The self, the origin, the root, and the answer to that question.
• 8:40
  Well, don't you trust about yourself?
• 8:43
  It's going to tell you everything about where your healing needs to begin.
• 8:50
  Whatever happened to you, receive this clear, y'.
• 8:54
  All.
• 8:55
  Whatever happened to you is not your fault.
• 9:00
  Not the abandonment, not the abuse, not the neglect, none of it.
• 9:08
  But the healing.
• 9:10
  The healing belongs to you.
• 9:12
  Because you are not just the person carrying wounds.
• 9:16
  You're a number, a vibration, a divine frequency that came here with a purpose.
• 9:22
  And that purpose has not expired.
• 9:26
  We'll pick it back up in part two.
• 9:28
  Until then, be gentle with yourself.
• 9:32
  You're doing the work just by listening, and that matters.
• 9:37
  So until next time, remember, you're all stars, so shine like one.