Latest / Tales of the Long Bow / 004 - The Elusive Companion of Parson White
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Chapter four of Tales of the Longbow. This is a
- 0:04Speaker 1: LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain.
- 0:08Speaker 1: For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org.
- 0:12Speaker 1: Recording by Olivia Tales of the Longbow by G. K. Chesterton,
- 0:17Speaker 1: Chapter four, The Elusive Companion of Parson White. In the
- 0:22Speaker 1: Scriptures and the Chronicles of the League of the Longbow
- 0:26Speaker 1: or Fellowship of Foolish Persons Doing Impossible Things, it is
- 0:30Speaker 1: recorded that Owen Hood, the lawyer, and his friend Crane,
- 0:33Speaker 1: the retired colonel, were partaking one afternoon of a sort
- 0:36Speaker 1: of picnic on the river island that had been the
- 0:39Speaker 1: first scene of a certain romantic incident in the life
- 0:41Speaker 1: of the former. The burden of reading about which has
- 0:44Speaker 1: fallen upon other readers in other days, suffice it to
- 0:48Speaker 1: say that the island had been devoted by mister Hood
- 0:50Speaker 1: to his hobby of angling, and that the meal then
- 0:53Speaker 1: in progress was a somewhat early interruption of the same
- 0:56Speaker 1: leisurely pursuit. The two old cronies had a third companion, who,
- 1:00Speaker 1: though considerably younger, was not only a companion but a friend.
- 1:04Speaker 1: He was a light haired, lively young man, with rather
- 1:07Speaker 1: a wild eye, known by the name of Pierce, whose
- 1:10Speaker 1: wedding to the daughter of the Innkeeper of the Blue
- 1:12Speaker 1: Boar the others had only recently attended. He was an
- 1:15Speaker 1: aviator and given to many other forms of skylarking. The
- 1:19Speaker 1: two older men had eccentric tastes of their own, but
- 1:22Speaker 1: there is always a difference between the eccentricity of an
- 1:25Speaker 1: elderly man who defies the world and the enthusiasm of
- 1:28Speaker 1: a younger man who hopes to alter it. The old
- 1:32Speaker 1: gentleman may be willing in a sense to stand on
- 1:34Speaker 1: his head, but he does not hope, as the boy does,
- 1:37Speaker 1: to stand the world on its head. With a young
- 1:40Speaker 1: man like Hillary Pierce, it was the world itself that
- 1:43Speaker 1: was to be turned upside down, and that was a
- 1:45Speaker 1: game at which his more grizzled companions could only look
- 1:48Speaker 1: on as at a child they loved playing with a
- 1:50Speaker 1: big colored balloon. Perhaps it was this sense of a
- 1:53Speaker 1: division by time, altering the tone, though not the fact
- 1:57Speaker 1: of friendship, which sent the mind of one of the
- 1:59Speaker 1: older men back to the memory of an older friend.
- 2:02Speaker 1: He remembered he had had a letter that morning from
- 2:04Speaker 1: the only contemporary of his who could fitly have made
- 2:07Speaker 1: a fourth to their party. Owen Hood drew the letter
- 2:10Speaker 1: from his pocket with a smile that wrinkled his long, humorous,
- 2:13Speaker 1: cadaverous face. By the way, I forgot to tell you,
- 2:17Speaker 1: he said, I had a letter from White yesterday. The
- 2:20Speaker 1: bronzed visage of the colonel was also seamed with the
- 2:23Speaker 1: external signs of a soundless chuckle. Read it, yet, he asked, Yes,
- 2:28Speaker 1: replied the lawyer. The hieroglyphic was attacked with fresh vigor
- 2:31Speaker 1: after breakfast this morning, and the clouds and mysteries of
- 2:34Speaker 1: yesterday's laborious hours seemed to be rolled away. Some portions
- 2:39Speaker 1: of the cuneiform still wait in expert translation, but the
- 2:42Speaker 1: sentences themselves appear to be in the original English. Very
- 2:47Speaker 1: original English, snorted Colonel Crane. Yes, our friend is an
- 2:51Speaker 1: original character, replied Hood. Vanity tempts me to hint that
- 2:55Speaker 1: he is our friend because he has an original taste
- 2:58Speaker 1: in friends. That habit of his of putting the pronoun
- 3:01Speaker 1: on the first page and the noun on the next
- 3:04Speaker 1: has brightened many winter evenings for me. You haven't met
- 3:07Speaker 1: our friend White, have you, he added to Pierce. That
- 3:10Speaker 1: is a shock that still threatens you. Why what's the
- 3:13Speaker 1: matter with him, inquired Pierce. Nothing observed. Crane, in his
- 3:18Speaker 1: more staccato style, has a taste for starting a letter
- 3:21Speaker 1: with yours truly and ending it with dear sir, that's
- 3:24Speaker 1: all I should rather like to hear that letter, observed
- 3:27Speaker 1: the young man, So you shall answered, hood. There's nothing
- 3:31Speaker 1: confidential in it, and if there were, you wouldn't find
- 3:34Speaker 1: it out merely by reading it. The Reverend Wilding White,
- 3:37Speaker 1: called by some of his critics wild White, is one
- 3:40Speaker 1: of those country parsons to be found in corners of
- 3:43Speaker 1: the English countryside, of whom their old college friends usually
- 3:47Speaker 1: think in order to wonder what the devil their parishioners
- 3:49Speaker 1: think of them. As a matter of fact, my dear Hilary,
- 3:52Speaker 1: he was rather like you when he was your age,
- 3:55Speaker 1: And what in the world you would be like as
- 3:56Speaker 1: vicar in the Church of England aged fifty at first
- 4:00Speaker 1: stagger the imagination. But the problem might be solved by
- 4:03Speaker 1: supposing you'd be like him. But I only hope you
- 4:06Speaker 1: will have a more lucid style in letter writing. The
- 4:08Speaker 1: old boy is always in such a state of excitement
- 4:11Speaker 1: about something that it comes out anyhow. It has been
- 4:14Speaker 1: said elsewhere that these tales are, in some sense of
- 4:17Speaker 1: necessity told tale. Foremost, and certainly, the letter of the
- 4:21Speaker 1: Reverend Wilding White was a document suited to such a
- 4:24Speaker 1: scheme of narrative. It was written in what had once
- 4:27Speaker 1: been a good handwriting of the boulder sort, but which
- 4:30Speaker 1: had degenerated through excessive energy and haste, into an illegible scrawl.
- 4:35Speaker 1: It appeared to run as follows, quote, my dear Owen,
- 4:38Speaker 1: my mind is quite made up. Though I know the
- 4:40Speaker 1: sort of legal, long winded things you will say against it.
- 4:43Speaker 1: I know especially one thing a leathery old lawyer like
- 4:46Speaker 1: you is bound to say. But as a matter of fact,
- 4:48Speaker 1: even you can't say it in a case like this,
- 4:51Speaker 1: because the timber came from the other end of the
- 4:53Speaker 1: county and had nothing whatever to do with him or
- 4:55Speaker 1: any of his flunkies and syncophants. Besides, I did tell
- 4:58Speaker 1: it all myself, with a little assistance I'll tell you
- 5:01Speaker 1: about later, And even in these days, I should be
- 5:03Speaker 1: surprised to hear that sort of assistance could be anything
- 5:06Speaker 1: but a man's own affair. I defy you and all
- 5:09Speaker 1: your parchments to maintain that it comes under the game laws,
- 5:12Speaker 1: you won't mind me talking like this. I know jolly
- 5:15Speaker 1: well you'd think you were acting as a friend. But
- 5:17Speaker 1: I think the time has come to speak plainly end quote.
- 5:21Speaker 1: Quite right, said the colonel. Yes, said young Pierce, with
- 5:25Speaker 1: a rather vague expression. I'm glad he feels that the
- 5:28Speaker 1: time has come to speak plainly. Quite so, observed the
- 5:32Speaker 1: lawyer dryly. He continues as follows quote. I've got a
- 5:36Speaker 1: lot to tell you about the new arrangement, which works
- 5:38Speaker 1: much better even than I hoped. I was afraid at
- 5:41Speaker 1: first it would really be an encumbrance, as you know
- 5:43Speaker 1: it's always supposed to be. But there are more things
- 5:46Speaker 1: and all the rest of it, and God fulfills himself
- 5:48Speaker 1: and so on and so on. It gives one quite
- 5:51Speaker 1: a weird asiatic feelings sometimes. End quote. Yes, said the colonel.
- 5:56Speaker 1: It does, what does, asked Pierce, sitting up suddenly like
- 6:01Speaker 1: one who can bear no more. You are not used
- 6:03Speaker 1: to the epistolary method, said Hood indulgently. You haven't got
- 6:07Speaker 1: into the swing of the style. It goes on quote.
- 6:11Speaker 1: Of course he's a big pot down here, and all
- 6:13Speaker 1: sorts of skunks are afraid of him and pretend to
- 6:15Speaker 1: Boycott me. Nobody could expect anything else of those Pineapple people.
- 6:19Speaker 1: But I confess I was surprised at Parkinson. Sally, of
- 6:22Speaker 1: course is as sound as ever, but she goes to
- 6:24Speaker 1: Scotland a good deal and you can't blame her. Sometimes
- 6:27Speaker 1: I'm left pretty severely alone, but I'm not downhearted. You'll
- 6:30Speaker 1: probably laugh if I tell you that Snowdrop is a
- 6:33Speaker 1: really very intelligent companion. I confess I am long past laughter,
- 6:38Speaker 1: said Hilary Peers sadly. But I rather wish I knew
- 6:41Speaker 1: whose Snowdrop is. M child, I suppose, said the colonel shortly. Yes,
- 6:47Speaker 1: I suppose it must be a child, said Pierce. Has
- 6:49Speaker 1: he any children? No, said the colonel Bachelor. I believe
- 6:54Speaker 1: he was in love with a lady in those parts
- 6:56Speaker 1: and never married. In consequence, said Hood. I'd be quite
- 7:00Speaker 1: on the lines of fiction and film drama if Snowdrop
- 7:03Speaker 1: were the daughter of the lady when she had married another.
- 7:06Speaker 1: But there seems to be something more about Snowdrop. That
- 7:09Speaker 1: little sunbeam in the house quote. Snowdrop tries to enter
- 7:12Speaker 1: into our ways, as they always do, But of course
- 7:15Speaker 1: it would be a little awkward if she played tricks.
- 7:18Speaker 1: How alarmed. They would all be if she took it
- 7:20Speaker 1: into her head to walk about on two legs like
- 7:22Speaker 1: everybody else. End quote. Nonsense, ejaculated Colonel Crane. Can't be
- 7:27Speaker 1: a child talking about it walking about on two legs,
- 7:31Speaker 1: after all, said Pierce, thoughtfully, A little girl does walk
- 7:35Speaker 1: about on two legs, bit startling if she walked about
- 7:38Speaker 1: on three, said Crane. If my learned brother will allow me,
- 7:42Speaker 1: said Hood in his forensic manner, would he describe the
- 7:45Speaker 1: fact of a little girl walking on two legs as alarming?
- 7:49Speaker 1: A little girl is always alarming, replied Pierce. I've come
- 7:53Speaker 1: to the conclusion myself, went on Hood, that snowdrop must
- 7:56Speaker 1: be a pony. It seems a likely enough name for
- 7:59Speaker 1: a pony. I thought at first it was a dog
- 8:01Speaker 1: or a cat, But alarming seems a wrong word, even
- 8:04Speaker 1: for a dog or a cat sitting up to bag.
- 8:06Speaker 1: But a pony on its hind legs might be a
- 8:08Speaker 1: little alarming, especially when you're writing it. Only I can't
- 8:12Speaker 1: fit this view in with the next sentence. Quote. I've
- 8:15Speaker 1: taught her to reach down the things I want end quote.
- 8:19Speaker 1: Lord cried Pierce. It's a monkey, that, replied Hood had
- 8:23Speaker 1: occurred to me as possibly explaining the weird Asiatic atmosphere.
- 8:27Speaker 1: But a monkey on two legs is even less unusual
- 8:29Speaker 1: than a dog on two legs. The reference to Asiatic
- 8:32Speaker 1: mystery seems really to refer to something else, and not
- 8:36Speaker 1: to any animal at all. For he ends up by
- 8:38Speaker 1: saying quote, I feel now as if my mind were
- 8:41Speaker 1: moving in much larger and more ancient spaces of time
- 8:44Speaker 1: or eternity, and as if what I thought at first
- 8:46Speaker 1: was an Oriental atmosphere was only an atmosphere of the orient,
- 8:50Speaker 1: in the sense of days, spring and the dawn. It
- 8:53Speaker 1: has nothing to do with the stagnant occultism of decayed
- 8:56Speaker 1: Indian cults. It is something that unites a real innocence
- 8:59Speaker 1: with the amensnsities, a power as of the mountains, with
- 9:02Speaker 1: the purity of snow. This vision does not violate my
- 9:06Speaker 1: own religion, but rather reinforces it. But I cannot help
- 9:09Speaker 1: feeling that I have larger views. I hope, in two senses,
- 9:13Speaker 1: to preach liberty in these parts, so I may live
- 9:16Speaker 1: to falsify the proverb. After all that added hood folding
- 9:21Speaker 1: up the letter is the only sentence in the whole
- 9:24Speaker 1: thing that conveys anything to my mind, as it happens,
- 9:27Speaker 1: we have all three of us lived to falsify proverbs.
- 9:31Speaker 1: Hillary Peers had risen to his feet with the restless
- 9:33Speaker 1: action that went best with his alert figure. Yes, he said,
- 9:37Speaker 1: I suppose we can all three of us say we
- 9:39Speaker 1: have lived for adventures, or had some curious ones anyhow,
- 9:42Speaker 1: And to tell you the truth, the adventure feeling has
- 9:45Speaker 1: come on me very strong this very minute. Have got
- 9:47Speaker 1: the detective fever about this parson of yours. I should
- 9:50Speaker 1: like to get at the meaning of that letter, as
- 9:52Speaker 1: if it were a cipher about buried treasure. Then he added,
- 9:56Speaker 1: more gravely, and if, as I gather, your clerical friend
- 9:59Speaker 1: is really a friend and worth having, I do seriously
- 10:02Speaker 1: advise you to keep an eye on him. Just now.
- 10:04Speaker 1: Writing letters upside down is all very well, and I
- 10:07Speaker 1: shouldn't be alarmed about that. Lots of people think they've
- 10:10Speaker 1: explained things in previous letters they never wrote. I don't
- 10:13Speaker 1: think it matters whose snowdrop is, or what sort of
- 10:16Speaker 1: children or animals he chooses to be fond of. That's
- 10:19Speaker 1: all being eccentric in the good old English fashion, like
- 10:22Speaker 1: poetical Tinkers and mad Squire's you're both of you eccentric
- 10:26Speaker 1: in that same sort of way, and it's one of
- 10:28Speaker 1: the things I like about you. But just because I
- 10:30Speaker 1: naturally knock about more among the new people, I see
- 10:34Speaker 1: something of the new eccentricities, and believe me, they're not
- 10:37Speaker 1: half so nice as the old ones. I'm a student
- 10:40Speaker 1: of scientific aviation, which is a new thing itself, and
- 10:43Speaker 1: I like it. But there's a sort of spiritual aviation
- 10:46Speaker 1: that I don't like at all. Sorry, observed Crane, really
- 10:49Speaker 1: no notion of what you're talking about. Of course you
- 10:52Speaker 1: haven't answered Pierce with engaging candor. There's another thing I
- 10:56Speaker 1: like about you, But I don't like the way your
- 10:58Speaker 1: clerical friend talks about new visions and larger religions and
- 11:01Speaker 1: light and liberty from the east. I've heard a good
- 11:04Speaker 1: many people talk like that, and they were Mount Banks,
- 11:07Speaker 1: or the dupes of Mount Banks. And I'll tell you
- 11:09Speaker 1: another thing. It's a long shot, even with a long bow.
- 11:12Speaker 1: We used to talk about. It's a pretty wild guess,
- 11:15Speaker 1: even in this rather wild business. But I have a
- 11:17Speaker 1: creepy sort of feeling that if you went down to
- 11:19Speaker 1: his house and private parlor to see snowdrop, you'd be
- 11:22Speaker 1: surprised by what you saw. What should we see, asked
- 11:26Speaker 1: the colonel, staring You'd see nothing at all, replied the
- 11:30Speaker 1: young man. What on earth do you mean? I mean,
- 11:33Speaker 1: replied Pierce, that you'd find mister White talking to somebody
- 11:37Speaker 1: who didn't seem to be there. Hillary Pierce, fired by
- 11:41Speaker 1: his detective Fever, made a good many more inquiries about
- 11:43Speaker 1: the Reverend Wilding White, both of his two old friends
- 11:46Speaker 1: and elsewhere. One long conversation with owen Hood did indeed
- 11:50Speaker 1: put him in possession of the legal outline of certain
- 11:52Speaker 1: matters which might be said to throw a light on
- 11:55Speaker 1: some parts of the strange letter, and which might, in
- 11:57Speaker 1: time even be made to throw a light on the rest.
- 12:00Speaker 1: White was the vicar of a parish lying deep in
- 12:02Speaker 1: the western parts of Somershire, where the principal landowner was
- 12:06Speaker 1: a certain Lord Arlington, and in this case there had
- 12:09Speaker 1: been a quarrel between the squire and the parson of
- 12:12Speaker 1: a more revolutionary sort than is common in the case
- 12:15Speaker 1: of parsons. The clergyman intensely resented that irony or anomaly
- 12:19Speaker 1: which has caused so much discontent among tenants in Ireland
- 12:22Speaker 1: and throughout the world. The fact that improvements or constructive
- 12:25Speaker 1: work actually done by the tenant only passed into the
- 12:28Speaker 1: possession of the landlord. He had considerably improved a house
- 12:32Speaker 1: that he himself rented from the squire, but in some
- 12:34Speaker 1: kind of crisis of defiance or renunciation, he had quitted
- 12:38Speaker 1: this more official residence, bag and baggage, and built himself
- 12:41Speaker 1: a sort of wooden lodge or bungalow on a small
- 12:44Speaker 1: hill or mound that rose amid the woods on the
- 12:46Speaker 1: extreme edge of the same grounds. This quarrel about the
- 12:49Speaker 1: claim of the tenant to his own work was evidently
- 12:52Speaker 1: the meaning of certain phrases in the letter, such as
- 12:54Speaker 1: the timber coming from the other end of the county,
- 12:57Speaker 1: the sort of work being a man's own affair, and
- 12:59Speaker 1: the general allusion to somebody's flunkies or sycophants who attempted
- 13:03Speaker 1: to boycott the discontented tenant. But it was not quite
- 13:06Speaker 1: clear whether the allusions to a new arrangement and how
- 13:10Speaker 1: it worked referred to the bungalow or to the other
- 13:12Speaker 1: and more elusive mystery of the presence of snowdrop. One
- 13:16Speaker 1: phrase in the letter he found to have been repeated
- 13:19Speaker 1: in many places and to many persons without becoming altogether
- 13:22Speaker 1: clear in the process. It was a sentence that ran quote.
- 13:26Speaker 1: I was afraid at first it would really be an encumbrance.
- 13:28Speaker 1: As you know, it's always supposed to be end quote.
- 13:31Speaker 1: Both Colonel Crane and Owen Hood, and also several other
- 13:34Speaker 1: persons whom he met later in his investigations, were agreed
- 13:38Speaker 1: in saying that mister White had used some expression indicating
- 13:41Speaker 1: that he had entangled himself with something troublesome or at
- 13:44Speaker 1: least useless, something that he did not want. None of
- 13:47Speaker 1: them could remember the exact words he had used, but
- 13:50Speaker 1: all could state in general terms that it referred to
- 13:53Speaker 1: some sort of negative nuisance or barren responsibility. This could
- 13:57Speaker 1: hardly refer to Snowdrop, of whom he always wrote in
- 14:00Speaker 1: terms of tenderness, as if she were a baby or
- 14:02Speaker 1: a kitten. Seemed hard to believe that it could refer
- 14:05Speaker 1: to the house he had built entirely to suit himself.
- 14:08Speaker 1: It seemed as if there must be some third thing
- 14:10Speaker 1: in his muddled existence, which loomed vaguely in the background
- 14:13Speaker 1: through the vapor of his confused correspondence. Colonel Crane snapped
- 14:18Speaker 1: his fingers with a mild irritation and trying to recall
- 14:20Speaker 1: a trifle. He said it was a you know, I've
- 14:23Speaker 1: forgotten the word a botheration or embarrassment. But he's always
- 14:28Speaker 1: in a state of botheration and embarrassment. I didn't tell you,
- 14:32Speaker 1: by the way, that I had a letter from him too,
- 14:34Speaker 1: came the day after I heard yours, shorter and perhaps
- 14:38Speaker 1: a little plainer, and he handed the letter to Hood,
- 14:40Speaker 1: who read it out slowly. I never knew the old
- 14:43Speaker 1: British populace here an avalon itself, could be so broken
- 14:47Speaker 1: down by squires and sneaking lawyers. Nobody dared help me
- 14:50Speaker 1: move my house again, said it was illegal, and they
- 14:53Speaker 1: were afraid of the police. But Snowdrop helped, and we
- 14:56Speaker 1: carted it all away in two or three journeys, took
- 14:59Speaker 1: it right clean, ey the old fool's land altogether. This time,
- 15:02Speaker 1: I fancy the old fool will have to admit there
- 15:05Speaker 1: are things in this world he wasn't prepared to believe in.
- 15:09Speaker 1: But look here, began Hood, as if impulsively, and then
- 15:12Speaker 1: stopped and spoke more slowly and carefully. I don't understand this.
- 15:17Speaker 1: I think it's extremely odd. I don't mean odd for
- 15:20Speaker 1: an ordinary person. But odd for an odd person. Odd
- 15:24Speaker 1: for this odd person. I know whit better than either
- 15:27Speaker 1: of you can, and I can tell you that though
- 15:29Speaker 1: he tells a tale anyhow, the tale is always true.
- 15:33Speaker 1: He's rather precise and pedantic when you do come to
- 15:36Speaker 1: the facts, these litiguous quarrelsome people often are. He would
- 15:40Speaker 1: do extraordinary things, but he wouldn't make them out more
- 15:43Speaker 1: extraordinary than they were. I mean, he's the sort of
- 15:46Speaker 1: man who might break all the squire's windows, but he
- 15:48Speaker 1: wouldn't say he'd broken six when he'd broken five. I've
- 15:52Speaker 1: always found, when I got to the meaning of these
- 15:53Speaker 1: mad letters that it was quite true. But how can
- 15:57Speaker 1: this be true? How could Snowdrop, whatever she is, have
- 16:01Speaker 1: moved a whole house or old white either. I suppose
- 16:05Speaker 1: you know what I think, said Pierce. I told you
- 16:07Speaker 1: that Snowdrop, whatever else she is, is invisible. I'm certain
- 16:11Speaker 1: your friend has gone spiritualist, and snowdrop is the name
- 16:15Speaker 1: of a spirit or a control, or whatever they call it.
- 16:18Speaker 1: The spirit would say, of course, that it was mere
- 16:21Speaker 1: child's play to throw the house from one end of
- 16:23Speaker 1: the county to the other. But if this unfortunate gentleman
- 16:26Speaker 1: believes himself to have been thrown house and all in
- 16:28Speaker 1: that fashion. I'm very much afraid he's begun really to
- 16:32Speaker 1: suffer from delusions. The faces of the two older men
- 16:35Speaker 1: looked suddenly much older. Perhaps for the first time they
- 16:38Speaker 1: looked old. The young man, seeing their dolorous expression, was
- 16:42Speaker 1: warmed and fired to speak quickly. Look here, he said, hastily.
- 16:46Speaker 1: I'll go down there myself and find out what I
- 16:48Speaker 1: can for you. I'll go this afternoon train journey takes ages,
- 16:52Speaker 1: said the colonel, shaking his head. Other end of nowhere,
- 16:56Speaker 1: told me yourself, you had an appointment at the Air
- 16:58Speaker 1: Ministry tomorrow. Down there in no time, replied Piers, cheerfully.
- 17:02Speaker 1: I'll fly down. And there was something in the lightness
- 17:05Speaker 1: and youth of his vanishing gesture that seemed really like
- 17:08Speaker 1: Icarus spurning the earth, the first man to mount upon wings.
- 17:13Speaker 1: Perhaps this literally flying figure shown them more vividly in
- 17:16Speaker 1: their memories, because when they saw it again, it was,
- 17:19Speaker 1: in a subtle sense changed. When the other two next
- 17:22Speaker 1: saw Hillary Pierce on the steps of the Air Ministry,
- 17:25Speaker 1: they were conscious that his manner was a little quieter,
- 17:27Speaker 1: but his wild eye rather wilder than usual. They adjourned
- 17:31Speaker 1: to a neighboring restaurant and talked of trivialities while luncheon
- 17:34Speaker 1: was served. But the colonel, who was a keen observer,
- 17:37Speaker 1: was sure that Pierce had suffered some sort of a shock,
- 17:40Speaker 1: or at least some sort of check. While they were
- 17:43Speaker 1: considering what to say, Pierce himself said, abruptly, staring at
- 17:46Speaker 1: the mustard pot on the table, what do you think
- 17:49Speaker 1: about spirits? Never touch em? Said the colonel sound port.
- 17:52Speaker 1: Never heard anybody, I mean, the other sort, said Pierce,
- 17:56Speaker 1: things like ghosts and all that. I don't know, said Owen.
- 18:00Speaker 1: The Greek for it is agnosticism, the Latin for it
- 18:03Speaker 1: is ignorance. But have you really been dealing with ghosts
- 18:07Speaker 1: and spirits down at poor White's parsonage? I don't know,
- 18:11Speaker 1: said Pierce gravely. You don't mean you really think you
- 18:13Speaker 1: saw something? Cried Hood Sharply. The hair goes the agnostic,
- 18:17Speaker 1: said Pierce, with a rather weary smile. The minute the
- 18:20Speaker 1: agnostic hears a bit of real agnosticism, he shrieks out
- 18:24Speaker 1: that it's superstition. I say, I don't know whether it
- 18:27Speaker 1: was a spirit. I also say I don't know what
- 18:29Speaker 1: the devil else it was if it wasn't in plain words,
- 18:33Speaker 1: I went down to that place convinced that poor White
- 18:35Speaker 1: had got some sort of delusions. Now I wonder whether
- 18:38Speaker 1: it's I that have got the delusions. He paused a moment,
- 18:41Speaker 1: and then went on in a more collected manner. But
- 18:44Speaker 1: I'd better tell you about it to begin with. I
- 18:46Speaker 1: don't admit it as an explanation, but it's only fair
- 18:49Speaker 1: to allow, for it is a fact that all that
- 18:52Speaker 1: part of the world seems to be full of that
- 18:53Speaker 1: sort of thing. You know how the glamor of Glastonbury
- 18:57Speaker 1: lies over all that land, and the lost whom of
- 18:59Speaker 1: King Arthur, and the time when he shall return, and
- 19:02Speaker 1: the prophecies of Merlin, and all the rest. To begin with,
- 19:06Speaker 1: the village they call Ponder's End ought to be called
- 19:08Speaker 1: World's end. It gives one the impression of being somewhere
- 19:12Speaker 1: west of the sunset. And then the parsonage is quite
- 19:15Speaker 1: a long way west of the parish, in large neglected
- 19:17Speaker 1: grounds fading into pathless woods and hills. I mean the
- 19:21Speaker 1: old empty rectory that our wild friend has evacuated. It
- 19:24Speaker 1: stood there, a cold, empty shell of flat classical architecture,
- 19:28Speaker 1: as hollow as one of those classical temples they used
- 19:31Speaker 1: to stick up in country seats. But White must have
- 19:34Speaker 1: done some sort of parish work there, for I found
- 19:36Speaker 1: a great big empty shed on the grounds, the sort
- 19:39Speaker 1: of thing that's used for a school room or drill
- 19:41Speaker 1: hall or what not. But not a sign of him
- 19:44Speaker 1: or his work can be seen there. Now I've said
- 19:46Speaker 1: it's a long way west of the village that you
- 19:48Speaker 1: come at last to the old house. Well, it's a
- 19:51Speaker 1: long way west of that that you come to the
- 19:53Speaker 1: new house, if you come to it at all. As
- 19:56Speaker 1: for me, I came, and I came not as in
- 19:59Speaker 1: some old middle of Merlin, but you shall hear. I
- 20:03Speaker 1: had come down about sunset in a meadow near Ponder's End,
- 20:07Speaker 1: and I did the rest of the journey on foot,
- 20:09Speaker 1: for I wanted to see things in detail. This was
- 20:11Speaker 1: already difficult, as it was growing dusk, and I began
- 20:13Speaker 1: to fear that I should find nothing of importance before nightfall.
- 20:17Speaker 1: I'd ask a question of one or two of the
- 20:18Speaker 1: villagers about the vicar and his new self made vicarage.
- 20:21Speaker 1: They were very reticent about the former, but I gathered
- 20:24Speaker 1: to the latter stood on the extreme edge of his
- 20:26Speaker 1: original grounds. On a hill rising out of a thicket
- 20:29Speaker 1: of wood. In the increasing darkness, it was difficult to
- 20:32Speaker 1: find the place, but I came on it at last,
- 20:35Speaker 1: In a place where a fringe of forest ran along
- 20:37Speaker 1: under the low brow of a line of rugged cliffs,
- 20:40Speaker 1: such as sometimes break the curves of the great Downlands,
- 20:43Speaker 1: I seemed to be descending a thickly wooded slope, with
- 20:46Speaker 1: the sea of tree tops below me. And out of
- 20:48Speaker 1: all that sea, like an island, rose the dome of
- 20:51Speaker 1: the isolated hill, and I could see faintly the building
- 20:54Speaker 1: on it, darker against the dark clouded sky. For a moment,
- 20:58Speaker 1: a faint line of light from the masked moon showed
- 21:00Speaker 1: me a little more of its shape, which seemed singularly
- 21:03Speaker 1: simple and airy in its design. Against that pallid gleam
- 21:07Speaker 1: stood four strong columns, with the bulk of the building
- 21:09Speaker 1: apparently lifted above them. But it produced a queer impression,
- 21:14Speaker 1: as if this Christian priest had built for his final
- 21:16Speaker 1: home a heathen temple of the winds. As I leaned
- 21:20Speaker 1: forward peering at it, I overbalanced myself and slid rapidly
- 21:24Speaker 1: down the steep thicket into the darkest end trails of
- 21:26Speaker 1: the wood. From there I could see nothing of the
- 21:29Speaker 1: pillared house, or temple, or whatever it was on the hill.
- 21:32Speaker 1: The thick woods had swallowed me up literally like a sea,
- 21:35Speaker 1: and I groped from what must have been nearly half
- 21:37Speaker 1: an hour amid tangled roots and low branches in that
- 21:41Speaker 1: double darkness of night and shadow, before I found my
- 21:43Speaker 1: feet slipping on the opposite slope and began to climb
- 21:46Speaker 1: the hill on top of which the temple stood. It
- 21:49Speaker 1: was very difficult climbing, of course, through the network of
- 21:51Speaker 1: briars and branching trees, and it was some little time
- 21:54Speaker 1: afterwards that I burst through the last screen of foliage
- 21:57Speaker 1: and came out upon the bare hilltop. Yes, upon the
- 22:00Speaker 1: bare hilltop. Rank grasses grew on it, and the wind
- 22:04Speaker 1: blew them about like hair on a head. But for
- 22:06Speaker 1: any trace of anything else, that green dome was as
- 22:09Speaker 1: bare as a skull. There was no sign or shadow
- 22:12Speaker 1: of the building I had seen there a little time before.
- 22:15Speaker 1: It had vanished like a fairy palace. A broad track
- 22:18Speaker 1: broken through the woods seemed to lead up to it,
- 22:20Speaker 1: so far as I could make out in that obscurity,
- 22:23Speaker 1: but there was no trace of the building to which
- 22:25Speaker 1: it led, and when I saw that I gave up,
- 22:28Speaker 1: something told me I should find out no more. Perhaps
- 22:31Speaker 1: I had some shaken sense that there were things past
- 22:34Speaker 1: finding out. I retraced my steps, descending the hill as
- 22:37Speaker 1: best I might. But when I was again swallowed up
- 22:39Speaker 1: on that leafy sea, something happened that, for an instant
- 22:43Speaker 1: turned me cold as stone. And unearthly noise like long
- 22:48Speaker 1: hooting laughter rang out in vast volume over the forest
- 22:51Speaker 1: and rose to the stars. It was no noise to
- 22:54Speaker 1: which I could put a name. It was certainly no
- 22:56Speaker 1: noise I had ever heard before. It bore some sort
- 22:59Speaker 1: of resemblance, yet to the neighing of a horse, immensely magnified.
- 23:03Speaker 1: Yet it might have been half human. And there was
- 23:05Speaker 1: triumph in it and derision. I will tell you one
- 23:08Speaker 1: more thing I larnt before I left those parts. I
- 23:11Speaker 1: left them at once, partly because I really had an
- 23:13Speaker 1: appointment early this morning, as I told you. Partly also,
- 23:17Speaker 1: I think because I felt you had the right to
- 23:19Speaker 1: know at once what sort of things were to be faced.
- 23:22Speaker 1: I was alarmed when I thought your friend was tormented
- 23:25Speaker 1: with imaginary bogies. I am not less alarmed if he
- 23:28Speaker 1: got mixed up with real ones. Anyhow, before I left
- 23:32Speaker 1: that village, I had told one man what I had seen,
- 23:34Speaker 1: and he told me he had seen it also, but
- 23:37Speaker 1: he had seen it actually moving in dusk, turning to dark,
- 23:41Speaker 1: the whole great house with its high columns, moving across
- 23:44Speaker 1: the fields like a great ship sailing on the land.
- 23:48Speaker 1: Owen Hood sat up suddenly with awakened eyes and struck
- 23:51Speaker 1: the table. Look here, he cried, with a new ring
- 23:54Speaker 1: in his voice. We must all go down to Ponder's
- 23:56Speaker 1: end and bring this business to a finish. Do you
- 23:59Speaker 1: think you'll bring it to a finish, ask Pierce gloomily,
- 24:02Speaker 1: or can you tell what sort of a finish? Yes,
- 24:05Speaker 1: replied Hood resolutely. I think I can finish it, and
- 24:09Speaker 1: I think I know what the finish will be. The
- 24:11Speaker 1: truth is, my friend, I think I understand the whole
- 24:14Speaker 1: thing now, as I told you before. Wild and White,
- 24:17Speaker 1: so far as being deluded by imaginary bogies, is a
- 24:20Speaker 1: gentleman very exact in his statements in this matter. He
- 24:23Speaker 1: has been very exact. That has been the whole mystery
- 24:25Speaker 1: about him, that he has been very much too exact.
- 24:29Speaker 1: What on earth do you mean by that, ask Pierce,
- 24:32Speaker 1: I mean, said the lawyer that I have suddenly remembered
- 24:35Speaker 1: the phrase he used. It was very exact. It was
- 24:38Speaker 1: dull literal truth. But I can be exact too. They
- 24:44Speaker 1: found the village of Ponder's End in a condition as
- 24:47Speaker 1: comically incongruous as could well be with the mystical experiences
- 24:51Speaker 1: of mister Hillary Pearce. When we talk of such places
- 24:54Speaker 1: as sleepy, we forget that they are very wide awake
- 24:57Speaker 1: about their own affairs, and especially on their own festive occasions.
- 25:01Speaker 1: Piccadilly Circus looks much the same on Christmas Day or
- 25:04Speaker 1: any other, but the market place of a country town
- 25:07Speaker 1: or village looks very different on the day of the fair.
- 25:09Speaker 1: A bazaar, and Hilary Pierce, who had first come down
- 25:12Speaker 1: there to find in a wood at midnight the riddle
- 25:15Speaker 1: that he thought worthy of Merlin, came down the second
- 25:18Speaker 1: time to find himself plunged suddenly into the middle of
- 25:21Speaker 1: a bustling bathos of a jumble sale. It was one
- 25:24Speaker 1: of those bazaars to provide bargains for the poor, at
- 25:27Speaker 1: which all sorts of odds and ends are sold off,
- 25:30Speaker 1: but it was treated as a sort of fate, and
- 25:32Speaker 1: highly colored posters and handbills announced its nature. On every side.
- 25:37Speaker 1: The bustle seemed to be dominated by a tall, dark
- 25:39Speaker 1: lady of distinguished appearance, whom Owen Hood, rather to the
- 25:42Speaker 1: surprise of his companions, hailed as an old acquaintance, and
- 25:46Speaker 1: managed to draw a side for a private talk. She
- 25:49Speaker 1: had appeared to have her hands full at the bazaar. Nevertheless,
- 25:52Speaker 1: her talk with Hood was rather a long one. Pierce
- 25:55Speaker 1: only heard the last words of it. Oh, he promised
- 25:57Speaker 1: he was bringing something for the sale. I assure you
- 26:00Speaker 1: he always keeps his word. All Hood said when he
- 26:04Speaker 1: rejoined his companion was that's the lady White was going
- 26:07Speaker 1: to marry. I think I know now why things went wrong,
- 26:11Speaker 1: and I hope they may go right. But there seems
- 26:13Speaker 1: to be another bother. You see that clump of clod
- 26:16Speaker 1: hopping policemen over there, inspector and all. It seems they
- 26:20Speaker 1: are waiting for White. Say he's broken the law in
- 26:23Speaker 1: taking his house off the land, and that he has
- 26:25Speaker 1: always eluded them. I hope there won't be a scene
- 26:28Speaker 1: when he turns up. If this was mister Hood's hope,
- 26:32Speaker 1: it was ill founded and destined to disappointment. A scene
- 26:36Speaker 1: was but a faint description of what was in store
- 26:38Speaker 1: for that hopeful gentleman. Within ten minutes, the greater part
- 26:42Speaker 1: of the company were in a world in which the
- 26:44Speaker 1: sun and moon seemed to have turned topsy turvy, and
- 26:47Speaker 1: the last limit of unlikelihood had been reached. Pierce had
- 26:50Speaker 1: imagined he was very near the limit of the imagination
- 26:53Speaker 1: when he groped after the vanishing temple in the dark forest.
- 26:56Speaker 1: But nothing he had seen in that darkness and solitude
- 26:59Speaker 1: was so fantastic as what he next saw in broad daylight,
- 27:03Speaker 1: in a crowd. At one extreme edge of the crowd,
- 27:06Speaker 1: there was a sudden movement, a wave of recoil and
- 27:09Speaker 1: wordless cries. The next moment it had swept like a
- 27:13Speaker 1: wind over the whole populace, and hundreds of faces were
- 27:16Speaker 1: turned in one direction, in the direction of the road
- 27:19Speaker 1: that descended by a gradual slope towards the woods that
- 27:22Speaker 1: fringed the vicarage grounds. Out of those woods at the
- 27:25Speaker 1: foot of the hill had emerged something that might, from
- 27:28Speaker 1: its size have been a large, light, gray omnibus. But
- 27:31Speaker 1: it was not an omnibus. It scaled the slope so
- 27:35Speaker 1: swiftly in great strides that it became instantly self evident
- 27:39Speaker 1: what it was. It was an elephant, whose monstrous form
- 27:43Speaker 1: was molded in gray and silver in the sunlight, and
- 27:47Speaker 1: on whose back sat a very vigorous, middle aged gentleman
- 27:50Speaker 1: in black clerical attire, with blanched hair and a rather
- 27:53Speaker 1: fierce aquiline profile that glanced proudly to left and right.
- 27:58Speaker 1: The police inspector managed to make one stepped forward, and
- 28:01Speaker 1: then stood like a statue. The vicar, on his vast steed,
- 28:06Speaker 1: sailed into the middle of the market place, as serenely
- 28:09Speaker 1: as if he had been the master of a familiar circus.
- 28:12Speaker 1: He pointed in triumph to one of the red and
- 28:14Speaker 1: blue posters on the wall, which bore the traditional title
- 28:17Speaker 1: of white Elephant sail. You see, I've kept my word,
- 28:22Speaker 1: he said to the lady, in a loud, cheerful voice,
- 28:24Speaker 1: I've brought a white elephant. The next moment, he had
- 28:27Speaker 1: waved his hand hilariously in another direction, having caught sight
- 28:31Speaker 1: of Hood and Crane in the crowd. Splendid of you
- 28:34Speaker 1: to come, he called out. Only you were in the secret.
- 28:38Speaker 1: I told you I'd got a white elephant, so he did,
- 28:42Speaker 1: said Hood. Only it never occurred to us that the
- 28:44Speaker 1: elephant was an elephant and not a metaphor. So that's
- 28:49Speaker 1: what he meant by asiatic atmosphere and snow and mountains,
- 28:53Speaker 1: and that's what the big shed was really for. Look here,
- 28:56Speaker 1: said the inspector, recovering from his astonishment and breaking in
- 29:00Speaker 1: on these felicitations. I don't understand all these games, but
- 29:03Speaker 1: it's my business to ask a few questions. Sorry to
- 29:06Speaker 1: say it, sir, but you've ignored our notifications and evaded
- 29:10Speaker 1: our attempts to have I inquired, mister White brightly, have
- 29:14Speaker 1: I really evaded you? Well? Well, perhaps I have an elephant?
- 29:18Speaker 1: Is such a standing temptation to evasion, like evanescence, to
- 29:22Speaker 1: fading away like a dew drop? Like a snowdrop, perhaps
- 29:26Speaker 1: would be more appropriate. Come on, snowdrop. The last word
- 29:30Speaker 1: came smartly, and he gave a smart smack to the
- 29:32Speaker 1: huge head of the pacoderm. Before the inspector could move
- 29:36Speaker 1: or anyone had realized what had happened, the whole bulk
- 29:39Speaker 1: had pitched forward with a plunge like a cataract, and
- 29:42Speaker 1: went in great whirling strides, the crowds scattering before it.
- 29:45Speaker 1: The police had not come provided for elephants. Which are
- 29:48Speaker 1: rare in those parts. Even if they had overtaken it
- 29:52Speaker 1: on bicycles, they would have found it difficult to climb
- 29:54Speaker 1: it on bicycles. Even if they had revolvers. They had
- 29:58Speaker 1: omitted to conceal about their persons anything in the way
- 30:00Speaker 1: of big game rifles. The White Monster vanished rapidly up
- 30:04Speaker 1: the long white road, so rapidly that when it dwindled
- 30:07Speaker 1: to a small object and disappeared, people could hardly believe
- 30:10Speaker 1: that such a prodigy had ever been present, or that
- 30:13Speaker 1: their eyes had not been momentarily bewitched. Only as it
- 30:16Speaker 1: disappeared in the distance, Pierce heard once more the high
- 30:20Speaker 1: nasal trumpeting noise, which, in the eclipse of night, had
- 30:23Speaker 1: seemed to fill the forest with fear. It was at
- 30:27Speaker 1: a subsequent meeting in London that Crane and Pierce had
- 30:29Speaker 1: an opportunity of learning more or less the true story
- 30:32Speaker 1: of the affair, in the form of another letter from
- 30:35Speaker 1: the parson to the lawyer. Now that we know the secret,
- 30:38Speaker 1: said Pierce cheerfully, even his account of it ought to
- 30:40Speaker 1: be quite clear. H quite clear, Quite clear, replied Hood calmly.
- 30:47Speaker 1: His letter begins, Dear Owen, I am really tremendously grateful
- 30:51Speaker 1: in spite of all I used to say against leather
- 30:53Speaker 1: and about horse hair. About what asked Pierce horsehair, said
- 30:58Speaker 1: Hood with severity. He goes on quote. The truth is
- 31:02Speaker 1: they thought they could do what they liked with me,
- 31:04Speaker 1: because I always boasted that I hadn't got one and
- 31:06Speaker 1: never wanted to have one. But when they found out
- 31:08Speaker 1: I had got one, and I must say, a jolly
- 31:10Speaker 1: good one. Of course, it was all quite different. Peers
- 31:14Speaker 1: had his elbows on the table and his fingers thrust
- 31:17Speaker 1: up into his loose yellow hair. He had rather the
- 31:19Speaker 1: appearance of holding his head on. He was muttering to himself,
- 31:22Speaker 1: very softly, like a schoolboy learning a lesson. He hadn't
- 31:26Speaker 1: got one, but he didn't want one, and he hadn't
- 31:30Speaker 1: got one, and he had a jolly good one one.
- 31:34Speaker 1: What asked Crane irritably seems like a missing word competition.
- 31:38Speaker 1: I've got the prize, observed Hood placidly. The missing word
- 31:42Speaker 1: is solicitor. What he means is that the police took
- 31:45Speaker 1: liberties with him because they knew he would not have
- 31:48Speaker 1: a lawyer. And he is perfectly right, for when I
- 31:50Speaker 1: took up the matter on his behalf. I soon found
- 31:53Speaker 1: that they had put themselves on the wrong side of
- 31:55Speaker 1: the law at least as much as he had. In short,
- 31:58Speaker 1: I was able to extricate him from this police business,
- 32:01Speaker 1: hence his hearty, if not lucid gratitude. But he goes
- 32:04Speaker 1: on to talk about something rather more personal, and I
- 32:07Speaker 1: think it really has been a rather interesting case, if
- 32:09Speaker 1: he does not exactly shine as a narrator of it,
- 32:12Speaker 1: as I dare say you noticed. I did know something
- 32:15Speaker 1: of the lady whom our eccentric friend went courting years ago,
- 32:18Speaker 1: rather in the spirit of Sir Roger de Koverley when
- 32:21Speaker 1: he went courting the widow. She is a miss Julia Drake,
- 32:24Speaker 1: daughter of a country gentleman. I hope you won't misunderstand
- 32:27Speaker 1: me if I say that she is a rather formidable lady.
- 32:30Speaker 1: She is really a thoroughly good sort. But that air
- 32:33Speaker 1: of the black browed juno she has about her does
- 32:36Speaker 1: correspond to some real qualities. She is one of those
- 32:39Speaker 1: people who can manage big enterprises, and the bigger they are,
- 32:42Speaker 1: the happier she is. When that sort of force functions
- 32:46Speaker 1: within the limits of a village or small valley, the
- 32:48Speaker 1: impact is sometimes rather overpowering. You saw her managing the
- 32:52Speaker 1: white elephant's sale at Ponder's end. Well, if it had
- 32:55Speaker 1: been literally an army of wild elephants, it would hardly
- 32:58Speaker 1: have been on too large a scale or her tastes.
- 33:01Speaker 1: In that sense, I may say that our friend's white
- 33:03Speaker 1: elephant was not so much of a white elephant. I
- 33:07Speaker 1: mean that in the sense that it was not so
- 33:08Speaker 1: much of an irrelevancy, and hardly even a surprise. But
- 33:13Speaker 1: in another way, it was a very great relief. You're
- 33:17Speaker 1: getting nearly as obscure as he is remonstrated, Pierce, what's
- 33:20Speaker 1: all this mysterious introduction leading up to what do you mean?
- 33:24Speaker 1: I mean? Replied the lawyer. That experience has taught me
- 33:28Speaker 1: a little secret about very practical public characters like that lady.
- 33:32Speaker 1: It sounds a paradox, but those practical people are often
- 33:35Speaker 1: more morbid than theoretical people. They are capable of acting,
- 33:39Speaker 1: but they are also capable of brooding when they are
- 33:41Speaker 1: not acting. Their very stoicism makes too sentimental a secret
- 33:45Speaker 1: of their sentimentalism. They misunderstand those they love and make
- 33:49Speaker 1: a mystery of the misunderstanding. They suffer in silence, a
- 33:53Speaker 1: horrid habit. In short, they can do everything, but they
- 33:57Speaker 1: don't know how to do nothing. Dearists, happy people who
- 34:01Speaker 1: do nothing, like our friend Pierce. Look here, cried the
- 34:05Speaker 1: indignant Pierce. I should like to know what the devil
- 34:07Speaker 1: you mean. I've broken more law than you ever read
- 34:10Speaker 1: in your life. If this psychological lecture is the new lucidity,
- 34:13Speaker 1: give me mister White, oh very well, replied Hood. If
- 34:17Speaker 1: you prefer his text to my exposition, he describes the
- 34:21Speaker 1: same situation as follows quote. I ought to be grateful,
- 34:25Speaker 1: being perfectly happy after all this muddle. I suppose one
- 34:28Speaker 1: ought to be careful about nomenclature, But it never even
- 34:31Speaker 1: occurred to me that her nose would be out of joint.
- 34:33Speaker 1: Rather funny to be talking about noses, isn't it. For
- 34:36Speaker 1: I suppose really it was her rival's nose that figured
- 34:39Speaker 1: most prominently. Think of having a rival with a nose
- 34:41Speaker 1: like that to turn up at you talk about a
- 34:44Speaker 1: spire pointing to the stars, I think, said Crane, interposing
- 34:48Speaker 1: mildly that it would be better if you resumed your
- 34:51Speaker 1: duties as official interpreter. What was it you were going
- 34:54Speaker 1: to say about the lady who brooded over misunderstandings I
- 34:58Speaker 1: was going to say, replied the lawyer, that when I
- 35:00Speaker 1: first came upon that crowd in the village and I
- 35:03Speaker 1: saw that tall figure and dark, strong face dominating it
- 35:06Speaker 1: in the old way, my mind went back to a
- 35:08Speaker 1: score of things I remembered about her in the past.
- 35:11Speaker 1: Though we've not met for ten years, I knew from
- 35:13Speaker 1: the first glimpse of her face that she had been
- 35:15Speaker 1: worrying in a powerful, secretive sort of way, worrying about
- 35:19Speaker 1: something she didn't understand and would not inquire about. I remember,
- 35:23Speaker 1: long ago, when she was an ordinary fox hunting squire's daughter,
- 35:27Speaker 1: and how White was one of Sidney Smith's wild curates,
- 35:30Speaker 1: how she sulked for two months over a mistake about
- 35:33Speaker 1: a postcard that could have been explained in two minutes.
- 35:36Speaker 1: At least, it could have been explained by anybody except White.
- 35:39Speaker 1: But you will understand that if he tried to explain
- 35:42Speaker 1: the postcard on another postcard, the results may not have
- 35:45Speaker 1: been luminous, let alone radiant. But what has all this
- 35:48Speaker 1: to do with noses, inquired Pierce. Don't you understand, yet,
- 35:53Speaker 1: asked could with a smile. Don't you know who is
- 35:55Speaker 1: the rival with the long nose. He paused a moment,
- 35:59Speaker 1: and then continued. It occurred to me as soon as
- 36:01Speaker 1: I had guessed at the nature of the nose, which
- 36:03Speaker 1: may certainly be called the main feature of the story,
- 36:06Speaker 1: an elusive, flexible and insinuating nose, the serpent of their eden. Well,
- 36:13Speaker 1: they seem to have returned to their eden now, and
- 36:15Speaker 1: I have no doubt it will be all right, For
- 36:17Speaker 1: it is when people are separated that these sorts of
- 36:19Speaker 1: secrets spring up between them. After all, it was a
- 36:23Speaker 1: mystery to us, we cannot be surprised if it was
- 36:25Speaker 1: a mystery to her. A good deal of this is
- 36:28Speaker 1: still rather a mystery to me, remarked Pierce, though I
- 36:31Speaker 1: admit it is getting a little clearer. You mean that
- 36:34Speaker 1: the point that has just been cleared up, the point
- 36:37Speaker 1: about snowdrop, replied Hood. We thought of a pony, and
- 36:40Speaker 1: a monkey, and a baby, and a good many other
- 36:43Speaker 1: things that snowdrop might possibly be, But we never thought
- 36:46Speaker 1: of the interpretation which was the first to occur to
- 36:49Speaker 1: the lady. There was a silence, and then Crane laughed
- 36:53Speaker 1: in an eternal fashion. Well I don't blame her, he said,
- 36:56Speaker 1: One could hardly expect a lady of any delicacy to
- 36:59Speaker 1: de elephant. It's an extraordinary business when you come to
- 37:03Speaker 1: think of it, said Pierce. Where on earth did he
- 37:06Speaker 1: get the elephant? He says something about that too, said Hood.
- 37:11Speaker 1: Referring to the letter, he says, quote, I may be
- 37:14Speaker 1: a quarrelsome fellow, but quarrels sometimes do good. And though
- 37:17Speaker 1: it wasn't actually one of Captain Pierce's caravans, no hang
- 37:21Speaker 1: it all, cried Pierce. This is really too much to
- 37:25Speaker 1: see one's own name entangled in such hieroglyphics. It reminds
- 37:28Speaker 1: me of seeing it in a Dutch paper during the
- 37:30Speaker 1: war and wondering whether all the other words were terms
- 37:32Speaker 1: of abuse. I think I can explain, answered Hood patiently.
- 37:36Speaker 1: I assure you the rever gentleman is not taking liberties
- 37:39Speaker 1: with your name in a merely irresponsible spirit. As I
- 37:42Speaker 1: told you before, He is strictly truthful. When you get
- 37:44Speaker 1: to the facts, though they may be difficult to get
- 37:47Speaker 1: at curiously enough, there really is a connection. I sometimes
- 37:51Speaker 1: think there is a connection beyond coincidence, running through all
- 37:54Speaker 1: our adventures, a purpose in these unconscious practical jokes. It
- 37:58Speaker 1: seems rather eccentric to make friends with a white elephant.
- 38:01Speaker 1: Rather eccentric to make friends with us, said the colonel.
- 38:05Speaker 1: We are a set of white elephants. As a matter
- 38:07Speaker 1: of fact, said the lawyer. This particular last prank of
- 38:11Speaker 1: the parson really did arise out of the last prank
- 38:14Speaker 1: of our friend Pierce. Me said, peers, in surprise, Have
- 38:17Speaker 1: I been producing elephants without knowing it? Yes, replied Hood.
- 38:21Speaker 1: You remember when you were smuggling pigs in defiance of
- 38:24Speaker 1: the regulation you indulged, I regret to say, in a
- 38:27Speaker 1: deception of putting them in cages and pretending you were
- 38:30Speaker 1: traveling with a menagerie of dangerous animals. The consequence was,
- 38:34Speaker 1: you remember that the authorities forbade menageries altogether. Our friend
- 38:38Speaker 1: White took up the case of a traveling circus being
- 38:40Speaker 1: stopped in his town as a case of gross oppression,
- 38:43Speaker 1: and when they had to break it up, he took
- 38:45Speaker 1: over it the elephant sort of a small payment for
- 38:47Speaker 1: his services, I suppose, said Crane, curious idea taking a
- 38:51Speaker 1: tip in the form of an elephant. He might not
- 38:54Speaker 1: have done it if he'd known what it involved, said Hood.
- 38:57Speaker 1: As I say, he was a quarrelsome fellow, with all
- 39:00Speaker 1: his good points. There was a silence, and then Pierce said,
- 39:04Speaker 1: in an amusing manner, it's odd it should be the sequel
- 39:06Speaker 1: of my Little pig adventure, a sort of reversal of
- 39:09Speaker 1: the parturient montes. I put in a little pig, and
- 39:12Speaker 1: it brought forth an elephant. It will bring forth more monsters. Yet,
- 39:16Speaker 1: said owen Hood, we have not seen all the sequels
- 39:19Speaker 1: of your adventures as a swineherd attaching the other monsters,
- 39:22Speaker 1: or monstrous events so produced. The reader has already been warned,
- 39:26Speaker 1: nay threatened, that they are involved in the narrative called
- 39:29Speaker 1: the exclusive Luxury of enoch Oats, And for the moment
- 39:33Speaker 1: the threat must hang like thunder in the air. End
- 39:37Speaker 1: of Chapter four recording by Olivia