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Jean Claude Van Damme That's Weird · Nick and Kristen in the Podcast

0:10
Welcome to the Nick and Kristen in the podcast Podcast, we've
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got another segment called If I Were you, This is what I would
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do coming up later with Kristen. But first, I was up late last
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night and I was watching HBO and growing up I loved Sean Claude
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Van Damme. Like I was into all the martial
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arts movies and things like that.
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And The Universal Soldier was on last night and I watched it
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because I was like, oh, I used to like this movie, why not
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watch it and see how it goes? But then I started to realize
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that it's the premise is is. Odd, the plots are not quite
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they what they should be. And then I started looking into
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all the other movies I watched as a kid.
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And I was like, these are weird. Like the movies in the 90s were
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weird. So I came up.
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I want to go into what Universal Soldier is about.
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Because you haven't seen. It no, I don't know anything
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about that. And a new segment I'm calling
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Sean Claude Van Damme. That's weird.
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First, actually, you know what? Give me what you think Universal
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Soldier is about. Let me let me hear your ideas.
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What do? You think it's about, well, I'm
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immediately. I think I'm taking it too
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literally. There's a man that's been
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programmed by some government, some evil government.
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We're going to go with Russia because it's the 80s or 90s or
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whatever and he's meant to be an assassin.
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And but then other countries can hack into his program and he can
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work for them. So he's like, he works for no
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one. It's whoever is in charge of him
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at the moment. And then finally he realizes
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he's being programmed. He wakes up and starts fighting
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the men that tried to like put the chip in him or tried to
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control him. You're not as far as far off,
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really, you're not as far off as you think.
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You OK Good. So Universal soldiers.
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So there were two soldiers that were killed, actually multiple
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soldiers that were killed in action in the Vietnam War.
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And they were brought back to life in a top secret military
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experiment that creates superhuman warriors.
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So John Connor Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren Lundgren are old
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rivals from the Vietnam War. They were together there, but
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Dolph Lundron was like a real piece of POS, OK Van Damme was
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like this really nice guy. Both like, yeah, American.
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But they're both American. Yep.
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And they were. Yeah, Thankfully, Yeah, that's
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all. Everything.
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But they were killed in battle and then frozen and thought out
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decades later. Later had their memory wiped,
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turned into super soldiers that can't be killed so they're.
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Shot. Oh, they can't be killed.
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No, they can't be killed. They're already there.
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So Jean Claude starts to remember and then he escapes and
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goes on the run from all the other soldiers who and now Dolph
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Lundgren starts to remember and he's he's in mid like full on
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breakdown of like PTSD, which wasn't a thing in the 90s, which
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was, but they didn't, you know what it was.
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The bad guy gets the memory bag. He starts killing everyone and
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collecting their ears and hangs them on his necklace and and and
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they they end up fighting. Obviously I don't want to spoil
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it for anybody, but it was just like, what the hell is happening
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in this movie? But I mean, all these kinds of
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movies are ridiculous 'cause this has the elements of Captain
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America and all kinds of superhero Marvel stuff.
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If you break down any of those movies, it's ridiculous.
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It's true, but it's like they just put those movies out, like
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this was the 90s and 80s. They were just like, yeah, this
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is what we're gonna do. And they put it out and everyone
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just kind of went and saw it, 'cause I had Sean Klon Van Baek.
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Cause of the action sequence. Yeah, and so all the fighting
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and so, like, I don't know how these soldiers learned to do the
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split kicks like he did, but you know what I mean?
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That's what made them the best in the Vietnam War.
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It's true, but like I'm, I'm watching it and it's like we
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don't have those fun movies anymore.
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They just go and they don't. They don't make any damn sense
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and you don't really look. They don't make.
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Any damn sense. They don't make any damn sense.
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He's a little older now. And you don't van damn sense.
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Yeah. And you and you don't look, you
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don't look too deep in the thing or if we look.
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Excuse me, are you not going to drag me to go see the new Spider
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man? Are you not going to drag me to
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go see the new Supergirl? But you're.
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Acting like these possibly being like scrutinized for not being
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real enough I. Know but like you're acting like
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those movies are full of depth and like for some of them they
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are the. Spider man 1 is like super deep.
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Like the? Super the go into spider man
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bringing some tissues. Bar Spider Man gets me every
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time with Tom Holland, that guy, that kid.
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Can emote like a son. Of a guy he is Peter Parker like
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I, I haven't seen him in in any other movie, but I'm like, Dang,
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you're a good actor I buy everything that's happening to
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you and I think you you think you're a spider and I I believe
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it but yeah, like, but if you break down any premise like
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that, it's silly of. Superhero movies, but like.
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This is essentially what this was before the superhero.
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Crew knew about this like they were just like here's a movie
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about a soldier that get killed in Vietnam and come back to life
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and starts killing. People I know, but we.
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Didn't have? OK, I'll go watch that.
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But back then superhero movies were ridiculous and so they
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weren't being made. But people still of action
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movies and action movies notoriously have ridiculous
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plots. I don't.
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Really think like. Ethan Hunt from Mission
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Impossible is really wearing a skin mask that allows him
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retinal action into a thing and then he pulls it off and like it
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comes clean off maybe? Like, does anyone buy that?
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Nobody buys it, It's just fun. But that's at least like he's a
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regular guy with super spy tech like we all imagine Texas like
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this is very much like, oh, we're reanimating the dead now
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and putting them to work for the.
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Government. We all kind of believe.
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I know. I mean, I think it's funny that
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you're questioning this now, because movies like this have
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existed since the beginning of time.
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Like you can say this about absolutely any.
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Can you like name one from the 60s that you're just like, Oh
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well that didn't make no damn sense.
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No Van Dam. Sense well, I mean, like it's so
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I mean, if you want to go like to like any Kubrick film, like
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if you want to pull out 2001 Space Odyssey, like back then,
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did you really think it was? It was scary to think about a
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computer coming to life in the middle of space and then
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controlling the whole Dang thing.
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But I mean that's it's a fun story.
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Like it's not brooded in any reality.
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It was just made-up. So I mean that's the same thing
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with this one. It's OK, they're reanimating the
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dead and having them fight, but like it's this it's just as
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plausible as a computer taking over.
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I don't know that's. How I feel.
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That's fine. Well, this has been Sean Claude
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Van Damme. That's weird.
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Don't worry. Another one.
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Tomorrow I can't wait. I can't wait.
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Then like, I watched all his movies, like I was a Van Damme
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fan and and like him and Chuck Norris, Steven Seagal, like that
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was the era of karate and I was knee deep in it.
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So like, I can't wait to talk about all these movies I haven't
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seen in forever. Good.
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All right. Our next segment, our next
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version of If I Were You, this is what I would do.
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Not say and this is what you should do because I'm not you,
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but if I were you, this is what I do.
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So it's a new therapy segment with Kristen saying that she
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would what she would do or what she would say to someone that
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presented this issue. And just a reminder, this is not
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advice. If you're going through this.
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Kristen's a marriage and family therapist, but she is not your
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therapist, right? So, dear Kristen, my husband of
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13 years has grown a mustache that triggers my childhood
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trauma. For the whole time we've been
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married, he's been clean shaven, but recently decided to try
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growing a mustache. Yeah, one problem is that I I
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find it extremely unattractive on him.
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The other part is that it reminds me of a predator that
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lived in my neighborhood when I was 12 to 13 years old who would
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expose himself. This is horrible.
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Seeing him like this makes me have no desire to be close to
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him or kiss him or anything. He says he enjoys exploring the
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freedom of experimenting with his look.
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And I should instead deal with the trauma that's causing this
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reaction. OK, how do we get past this?
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OK, so he's not wrong. You definitely should.
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If if I was giving, if I was, if I was you, I would definitely
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explore that trauma in a therapy session.
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Like there's lots of great trauma therapies now, you can
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definitely work with that. But in the meantime, I think the
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issue that you're kind of presenting is the fact that you
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are exposing that something very traumatic happened to you and
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that your partner knows about that and that they're purposely
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not honoring your wishes. And I think that that's the part
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where as a marriage and family therapist, I would look at that
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and go, why would you want to trigger?
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Why would you want to trigger some traumatic memory from your
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partner's past? There are so many ways to
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explore your look. OK, you could be funny hat guy.
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You could be monocle guy. You could be always wearing a
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scarf even though it's summer guy.
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You could be a cowboy boots with jeans guy.
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Like there's so many things you could do, but this is the thing
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that you're hanging your mustache hat on.
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Well, maybe the his dream. He must always grow a mustache
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and he never had a chance to do it.
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Like why should he now suppress his dream because she's
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triggered by it? He didn't know she was going to
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get triggered by it, and she didn't get triggered until he
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grew it. Sure.
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And she has now expressed, hey, this is very upsetting for me
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and I and it's rooted in something very real and very
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traumatic that happened to me. And the fact that he's like,
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deal with it. I'm mustache guy now that makes
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me go, why are we not meeting each other at least halfway?
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Can you have a flavor saver? Can you have a little?
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Can you have a Van Dyke? Can you grow something else?
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Can you grow the mustache out so it's long and curly and you look
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like the Monopoly man. There's there's other things
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that you do, but the fact that you're you're going Nope, this
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is the hill I'm going to stick on.
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Makes me wonder if you truly understand your partner.
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Yes, but like you said, he's not wrong in that she should.
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He's not wrong in the sense that she should work with somebody
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through it. Yeah.
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Like, you don't want to see a mustache on the street and be
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triggered. There's there.
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There is therapy for that. You shouldn't have to live your
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life like that. Can we make a deal then that
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once she goes to therapy and deals with that trauma, then I
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can grow a mustache? Well, now we're talking about
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exposure therapy, and that's something that we absolutely
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could do If his one desire in life is to grow a mustache, I.
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Never wanted to do in life before I die was grow a.
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Mustache, I mean, good Lord, we could talk about big dreams
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later. But like if, if that's the
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thing, then she can deal with her trauma and when she feels
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like she says under control, he can start growing it in.
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And if she's if she's able to handle that and she's not
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triggered by that, then they can go forward.
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But if she's again, once again triggered by that, shave the
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damn thing off, man. Not saying this is what you
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should do because I'm not you, but if I were you, this is what
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I do alright? Jumping right into something
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else. How about some Hold my beer?
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This story is crazy and another reason why we're never going to
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go to Mount Everest. So guides at Mount Everest have
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been poisoning people to scam them out of money.
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I've heard this. So if you go, do you know about
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this? All right, so if you go to Mount
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Everest and you want to climb it, you need a guide most of the
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time. Sherpa.
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Sherpa. Yeah.
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There's a group of guides that were poisoning their guests by
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putting baking soda in their food, which triggers severe
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gastrointestinal distress. And it looks a lot like altitude
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sickness. So you'd get on the mountain and
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then not feel so good. And their recommendation
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immediately was to have you helicoptered off the mountain to
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a hospital. But they had to deal with the
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helicopter companies and the hospitals.
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So they would send the helicopter to get you, which is
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insanely expensive. Obviously, they would take you
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to the hospital where they would give you insanely fake
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treatments that were expensive and then bill you for it and
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split the money. It was a $20 million scheme.
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I cannot believe they they're now investigating it obviously,
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and then eventually the hospitals will probably have to
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pay this money back. I have several thoughts on it,
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yeah. Well, I know how you feel about
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people going to Mount Everest. Yeah, I hate people that go to
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Everest. OK, I'm going to get that out
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there right off the bat. And I also want to point out
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that everything that was done is so unethical.
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It's so wrong. People should be held
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accountable, yes. That said, like the Sherpas are
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treated awful, almost inhumane and there are people paying 50,
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sixty, $70,000 to climb Everest climb.
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For the people not watching the video, I'm air quoting Climb
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Everest because what they do is they hand all their gear to
12:10
their Sherpa and they make them do all the work.
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And you're just following a trail.
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And you're following a trail that they're setting out for
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you. OK.
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They're taking care of everything.
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All you have to do is just kind of fall in line.
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All right, They're doing, doing everything.
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And they're extremely exploited by their government because it's
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a big industry, tourism to Everest.
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But the Sherpas aren't seeing any of that.
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So I can imagine how difficult it must be risking your darn
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life every day dragging up the equipment of some tech guy from
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Silicon Valley who wants to tell his friends he climbed Everest
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knowing that you've got a family you cannot feed, even though
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every day you're making this terrible, terrible trek.
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That said, you should not be poisoning people and working in
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cahoots with the helicopter companies and all of that.
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That's awful. I don't agree to that.
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But there should be something done to make sure that the the
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people that are truly sacrificing their life, which is
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these guides are getting the equivalent of some of this
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money. It's a hell of a scam though.
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It's a hell of a scam. Well done, well engineered, well
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done. I mean like everybody thought
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out and on so many levels. These guys have money because
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they paid $80,000 to get on the mountain.
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So like. You're only, you only climb
13:27
Everest if you're rich. And it's funny because somebody
13:30
asked the question, I think it was on the Internet a while ago,
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like that. Would it be, would it be
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interesting, a nice social study if, if we could say climb
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Everest, climb Everest all you want.
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The only rule is you have to sign a form saying you can't
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tell anybody about it afterwards.
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Would you still do it? Would you still do it?
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And if you couldn't brag to everybody that you know about
13:51
climbing Everest? To do anything ever, if I
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couldn't tell everybody, I think I want a bowl of 300 for me, I
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wanna bowl in there so I can tell everybody I bowl of 300.
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Like, I think climbing ever sounds so exciting, but if you
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couldn't tell anybody about it, does it take a little of that
14:06
flavor out? Something to look back on your
14:08
life, think about, See, do you really want to do this?
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If you couldn't tell anybody about it, would you still do?
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It well, and I mean, like, I'm calling this is a whole
14:16
different podcast episode, but like, it's the same thing that
14:18
I'm feeling being unemployed and being in the the the throes of
14:22
consumerism. Yeah, like all my life, all my
14:25
life, I've wanted a Louis Vuitton.
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Why? Because it's what rich people
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have lot because I love the purse or it's the greatest
14:34
quality of something. It's because of the brand is
14:36
because it of what I think it says about me and it's the same
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thing about Everest. It's like you think you're cool
14:43
because you climbed Everest, but the tides are turning.
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A lot of people look at this now and go you paid $80,000 to
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endanger a Himalayan person to just say that you climbed
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Everest. Like that's not cool anymore.
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It's not an accomplishment. Yeah, well, it's something to
15:00
think about about your Louis Vuitton, then.
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Like 100. Percent if you couldn't take it
15:03
outside. 100% and I absolutely have been debating that with
15:08
myself of like if nobody knew I had.
15:11
Getting a Louis. Vuitton No, I'm unemployed.
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Even when I had money, I didn't get one.
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But like, it's very much like if it wasn't a status symbol, if it
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meant I was, if it, if I could buy a Louis Vuitton, a TJ Maxx,
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would it be as exciting to me? And it absolutely wouldn't be.
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It's about what it represents to me.
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And I've created that along with societies created.
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That. And we've created this symbol.
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Would anyone drive a Lamborghini if they were $25,000?
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No, you drive a Lamborghini because it's $250,000 and you
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want everybody to know about it. But even if it was super fast,
15:45
if it was cheaper than IKEA, would it be as exciting?
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It's true. No it wouldn't.
15:48
Be, I don't know. So it's interesting, all right.
15:51
Think about that. We'd like to make you think here
15:52
on the Nikki Christian Podcast podcast.
15:54
So make sure you like and subscribe Apple, Spotify and
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YouTube. Thank you for watching.
15:58
Thank you for listening.