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Transforming Anger into Gratitude: A Radical Approach to Well-being with Damien King · Let's Get Naked

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_04: Hey everyone, I'm Ann, and this is Let's Get Naked.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_04: Um, I'm not gonna do an intro today because my guest doesn't need an introduction.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_04: He's uh I'm gonna say one sentence and it's gonna tell everyone what they need to know about who my guest is.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_04: He is um he is a reformed, angry big truck guy.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_05: For sure.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_04: And his name is Damien.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_04: So uh Damien, welcome to the show.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_05: Thank you, Ann.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_05: Amazing to be here.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_05: It's uh super exciting.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, thank you for coming and sharing all of the all of the things that you all of the big truck things.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_04: So, you know, for those of you that have tapped into my book or have listened to me talk, um, you know, the angry uh big truck guy is somebody that I'm real passionate about throwing a lifeline to because um because I raised one.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_04: I I I my brothers are then, you know, my my husband was one.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_04: Uh so it's it's something to me, whereas I've done this book and realized how important uh the Skittles are that get spent by the angry uh big truck guy.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_04: Um it just has it has pulled up my heart to be able to do this.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_04: And so for those that uh maybe don't know who Damien is, uh Damien has been in our orbit for about 15 years.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_04: Damien does uh pools and he's built several pools for us at different houses over the years, and and I've always just seen a light inside of Damien and and same for you.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so it's just it's fun to be able to be at this place now because Damien and I connected more uh in a in a bigger way a couple years ago and again than like about a year ago or six months ago.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_04: And so just continuing to connect a little bit with with folks that are in my life uh or at my table of life.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_04: You you'll know that I plant seeds and then just slowly attest to that.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_04: Like I just I plant a little seed for people that I care about and just wait for them to um and then some some of you are harder headed and I have to plant multiple seeds, which is okay as well.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_04: But uh so maybe Damien, you can just start by telling us a little bit about the pre uh, we'll just say pre-skittles, you know, so that you can pre-skittles.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_05: It's definitely the big truck, the angry guy.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_05: Um looking back from that is so much wasted energy, so much Skittles.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_05: The the roads are probably rainbows behind me.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_05: Um just with how much Skittles I wasted, just uh even just happened this morning.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, just letting somebody go, just saving the energy for this and for my kids.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_05: Um, so it was it's huge life-changing.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_05: And I tell the people that I tell about the book, just read the first chapter.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_05: Just read the first chapter because that's what I did for the the first couple times, is just that first chapter, and then it just snowballs.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it snowsballs down, and you then you're you're going driving and it's like geez, I used to I used to lose my mind, literally lose my mind.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_05: Like I don't have anything to live for.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_05: Hit me, let's let's go out and have a little conversation, and you're gonna have to either put me in the ground or because I'm not gonna stop.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: 100%.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_05: And that if that ever happened, I would have been a lot worse than what I am right now.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_05: Wouldn't have been around because I'd be in prison or jail.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_04: It's it's wild to me because it's like I realize uh how savage that is because I've watched, you know, I I've repaired that in myself several years ago.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_04: Doesn't mean it doesn't, you know, rear it's a ugly head every once in a while, right?
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_04: Because it's a constant battle.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_04: But it when after I had kind of gone through that and then watching Cameron and being in the car with him, it's like it's scary to be in the car with him as his partner, as his, you know, and it's like he's not any different when the kids are in the car.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_04: And so it was one of those things where it's like, boss, we got to get this under control because I know what that feels like when you're talking about, you know, having somebody that you you're already at an eight or a nine and somebody cuts you off or something, and you're willing to blow your entire life up.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_04: Like what you're talking about.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_04: I'm I don't have a reason to fucking live.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna put you in the wall.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_04: That's how we're gonna do it.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, I don't want people driving around in that eight or a nine already.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_04: You know, a lot of people um will see clips on the socials and they don't know what I'm talking about when I refer to the eight or nine.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_04: So I want to just take a second and like explain that.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_04: So um, you know, the the eight or the nine for me is I I say, okay, ten is where you're starting to destroy lives and and you know, handcuffs and all of the things, murder and whatever.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_04: But, you know, if you if you at base level and you have shit that you're carrying around that you don't realize you're carrying around, whether that's uh stuff from childhood, whether that's shit from last week, it doesn't matter where it came from.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_04: If it's you went through a something and you didn't process it all the way through yet or whatever that looks like, um, it just adds those those numbers, right?
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_04: So if you just think about like a vase or a vessel and it's like, okay, well, you're at a one because of that, you're at a two, you're at a three, you're at a four.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe you're in a marriage you're not happy about, maybe you're in a job you're not happy about, maybe it doesn't matter, right?
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_04: So you get to where your life is literally just has a small amount that's left on top.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_04: Then you're out in traffic and something happens and you'll outcrazy somebody because I know exactly what you're talking about.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, motherfucker, I'm willing to outcrazy you every time on the road, right?
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like I drive a big truck and so it's it's a big truck.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, then do that.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_05: And I'll just put my big truck through you.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_05: Exactly.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_04: I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna ruin your fucking day.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_04: I'll ruin both of our days, and not just our days, our lives.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_05: I mean our lives, for sure.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_05: For sure.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_04: Because I'm talking to Cameron about that and he's talking about, you know, we've been in construction our entire careers, and he's talked about where he's been at a customer's office when the police came and arrested that big truck guy because he was, you know, waving a gun out the window or whatever.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, that's that's your kids that are paying attention to that.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_04: That's what's happening.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_04: A thousand percent and you don't even realize it.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_04: And so it's like, you know, when you're handing down those generational things, whatever it is, it's ridiculous.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_04: It's ridiculous, and you think, oh, I'm not doing it, you know.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_05: You are right.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you know, talking to Cameron as an example, it's like, you know, he didn't lay his hands on the kids, but he said, How am I handing down anything different just because I'm keeping my hands in my pocket?
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_04: He was still doing the same thing, you know.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_04: So it's like it really is savage to look at what you're passing down to your kids because so many dads do this whole like, I would do anything for my kids, but you wouldn't like figure out your emotions so that you can regulate them in traffic so that your children aren't scared, like literally scared.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_04: And I know that you can handle me saying this because I'm not coming from a place of judgment.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_04: I'm coming from a place of a thousand percent correct right curiosity of like you don't want your children to be in survival mode um because of you.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, right?
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_04: Like you're supposed to be their safe space.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_05: I it's happened recently where the aho moment came in.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_05: It's like my son asked me, Why didn't you, you know, why don't you honk your horn?
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_05: Why don't you yell at him?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, would you rather me play with football with you and your friends, or would you rather me honk my horn at this person?
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and it was they cut us off major.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it was bad.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like and then he took him a couple seconds and he was like, Yeah, I'd rather play football.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_05: And I think it clicked in his head, but he took a minute, he was kind of quiet for a little bit, and it I got home and started bawling because it's true.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_05: Six, what, six weeks ago?
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, eight weeks ago, I'd have lost my mind.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_04: So Damien and I started working together only a couple of months ago as far as just really reading the book.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_04: He had he had purchased it when it first came out in October.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_05: When it first came out, and I regret not opening it.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_05: But the on the flip side, it's for me, reading's not the best thing.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_05: It's the audible.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_05: And knowing that it's your voice and you reading it, it's I'd start crying again.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_05: But um, it hits home a lot different.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and it's multiple times a week that I listen to it.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like if I'm spinning or doing, you know, going off on the deep end, it's I put the book on.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_05: And it's just right back to where it was.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_05: Skittles.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_05: And then wherever I stop, I just start over again.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_05: And it's every time I level up, it makes more sense.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_05: And then the chapters uh like stop it's still hard, but those are the ones that just keep adding and adding and adding.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_05: And it just keeps getting easier and easier and easier.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_05: There's still low days.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_05: You know, there's there's a lot more happy days and high days than there are low days, but case in point today is my daughter's birthday.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't get to see her.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_05: Um, she's with her mom, they're having fun doing what they're doing.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_05: I talked to her this morning, but last year it would have destroyed me.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I've been sad all day, more pissed off.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_05: Work would have, you know, like this, that, all that stuff.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_05: And it's it's not.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_05: It's like, okay, I can't wait to pick her up tomorrow.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_05: And days that I like today, I'm working on myself being here completely out of my comfort zone.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_05: And uh, so it's amazing.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, the it's just amazing.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_04: I look at that when you talk about, you know, there's a lot of a lot of dads who find themselves in positions where the marriage splits up and they just live in bitterness and anger and resentment.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_04: And I know that you know what that looks like because I've I've watched, yeah, I've watched, and it's like your kids deserve the best version of you.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_04: And when you're not with them, you should be working on them, not thinking about ways to kill your ex-wife.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_04: Not that that was the I don't I don't mean to put it in in terms like that, but I understand.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_05: For the first, you know, for uh what three and a half years, it was just when I didn't have my kids, like I was just pissed, sad, and didn't work on myself.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_05: Now the last six months, or not even six months, I would say two to three months from starting the book.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_05: It's like I'm not here, they're not here, I'm at the gym, I'm at this, I'm taking care of myself, I'm going for bike rides, working more so I can get so when I do have them, I don't have to work.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, um, it's it's amazing to see that change.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_05: And I used to, you know, it just where I would waste so much energy when I didn't have them.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_05: When I had them, I would just sit in the garage.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_05: They're playing and just numb out.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_05: The biggest thing for the last three years, numbing out.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_05: And it was TV, food, you know, alcohol, smoking, all of those things.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_05: And it was when I cleaned all that, it was hard.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_05: It was hard to stop all that whole cold turkey, but it's I feel so much more better.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_05: The body's changed, the mind's changed, and it's just amazing.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_05: And it's just just read to both.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_04: It's like it's like taking control of your life back in this way where you know, you if you're at a place where you feel um, God, you just feel like life is winning.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_05: You know, it is is is kicking your ass and and but you still have like the last Friday we talked and we had a good time, and that after I had to go back to work, second to last job, my truck strike breaks down.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_05: And I'm just all right, cool.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_05: Just another day.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yep.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_05: It was just what a month ago it'd have been like something.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_05: And been stressed, worried, like, how am I gonna get this done?
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_05: Nope.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_05: Just make some phone calls.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_05: Hey, this happened, this happened.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_05: If you know customers are upset, it is.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_05: I mean, I can't do anything about it.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_05: We'll get there as soon as we can.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_05: And it that changes in my head.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_05: I've before the book, I probably lost a couple customers because of the numbing, the you know, doing like, hey, I want to go home and numb.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_05: I want to go home and do this, I want to go home so I don't have to think about it.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_05: I've probably less up several clients and several long-term clients that I've had where I depended on somebody else because I was at home numbing and it didn't happen.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_05: And it's, you know, that's on me.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_05: I'm working on fixing all that.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_05: But it's it's so much easier to not go home and numb to get things done.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_04: It's interesting because it's like there's a there's a chunk of the book that talks about, you know, switching from the the negative to the positive and um that you get to instead of you have to and get it.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_05: That is the biggest one right there.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_05: That's even like yesterday, I get to go to the gym.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like I didn't, I don't, I don't want, yeah, I don't want to go.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I'm tired.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, but I get to go to the gym.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_05: Or I get to do this with my kids, or I get to go to work.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_05: Even the journaling, which is another whole, we could probably talk about that for an hour.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_05: Um, never done it before, never thought I would do it in my life, but journaling is amazing.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and it's and I miss it a couple times because I actually been able to go to sleep early.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_05: So it's like I miss it three or four times, and I'm like, God damn, what's going on?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_05: It's the fucking journaling.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, getting the crap out of my head.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_04: This it's like it touches base with you to you, right?
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_04: It's like it connects you to you when you do that.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_04: And it doesn't matter what there's no rules.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_04: You know, when Damien and I were first talking, it was like we all have these ideas in our head about like what the journal has to look like, or like all of these things.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, write it down anywhere.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_04: It doesn't have to, you know, it doesn't have to look like anything.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_05: Every time I tell you, you're like, oh, my handwriting, she's like, I don't give a shit.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_04: Just write it.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_05: I'm getting her read it.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like, nope, I don't give a shit.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_05: And I'll go back, like you say you go back and like check.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_05: I just go back and see what I it's like, I don't even think about that anymore.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_05: I don't even think that way anymore.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_04: It's like you got it out of your head.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_04: It's it is, it's like a it's like a dump, right?
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_04: And so instead of this loop in your head that just mindfucks you to death, you can just get it out and dump it.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like I'm like at the end of my go to bed, dang it.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like I just put the book down and I fall asleep.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_04: God, if you if you if the folks that if the folks at home could could know a couple months ago, Damien wasn't sleeping.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_04: Like, I mean, we're go and we're talking about somebody that was numbing out with drugs and alcohol and and and and doing all of these things and just miserable to you know, journaling and going, go to sleep and then just laying down and going to sleep.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_05: I think it was the last night that I the cold turkey night was I took over 200 milligrams and didn't sleep all night.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, didn't sleep one time.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I didn't sleep for the next five days because I cold turkeyed everything.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but it's also getting in like getting in shape, being healthy, like go get your blood work.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_05: You know, if you're having problems with everything with your weight and stuff, like my testosterone was 100.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's supposed to be, I think, in the six or seven, eight hundreds.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_05: And it it's a game changer with the book and that, it's it's ridiculous.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_04: Well, just putting effort into yourself, it's like when you're the best version of you that you can possibly be, everybody wins, right?
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_04: And I love that you say that so much because it's you know, I have people that give me uh feedback from the cheap seats, and that's all right, but that say, like, what an asshole I am uh because I put myself first.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_04: Like, I'm sure your kids fucking love that.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_04: And like, I'll bring my kids on here.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_05: No, I know her kids.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, exactly.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_04: Like Britney was on here last week.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_04: We recorded an episode, and I asked her that question so that people could hear because it does seem so counterintuitive when you say, like, I'm gonna put myself first, because it's like, I'm gonna put my kids first, I'm gonna put my kids first.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_04: But what happens when you do that is you're modeling behavior to them that you're not important enough to take care of, right?
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_04: Which is that's what you want to teach them.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_04: You wouldn't want your daughter when she gets to be an age where of dating a boy where she puts him first.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_04: So, how is it any different of you putting somebody else first?
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_04: It's like when you put yourself first and make certain that your mask is on, you're better for them and better for everyone.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_04: Mind, body, spirit.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_05: Yes.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_05: And then the the good thing, I mean, it's not a good thing that you know, I have my kids 50% of the time, but that 50% I don't have them, that's when I'm working on me.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_05: When I'm diving into the journal and I'm going to the gym to where I have those Skittles, yeah, a stockpile of them for them.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_05: And it's there's it's night and day.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_05: We had an incident with my mom on the on a creek.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_05: It was four hours, ambulances, fire trucks, everybody came perfectly fine.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_05: We sat in the waiting room for four hours at the emergency room.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, let's go back to the creek.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_05: Two months ago, it had been freaking out, losing control, yelling at my kids.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_05: And my son was I I give him credit for my time he's on point.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_05: Took his sister back to the truck, sat in the sat and waited for the fire truck.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_05: The only thing he didn't do, luckily we were in Sedona, is he didn't start the truck.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_05: And I'm like, You're gonna learn how to start the truck.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_05: I stopped at a stoplight and I said started.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_05: We're not moving until I start the truck because he was scared.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_05: Now he starts the truck and now he knows if something happens, that he has to do that for his his sister.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_04: And you can teach him from a place of not having like complete disregulation.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, exactly.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_04: Complete dysregulation.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_04: Like I just don't think people realize when you're yelling at your kiddos, uh, they're in fucking survival mode from their from the person that's supposed to be the most safe, you know.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_04: So when it's like again, I this is a common from no judgment.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_04: I fucking lived this.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_04: I lived this life, right?
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_04: I used to drink all the time in front of my kids.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_04: I used to be that person.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_04: I look back at things that I did in front of my young kids and just fucking cringe and just cringe, you know.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_04: And the beautiful part about it is we can we can write that ship.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, there's hard things to be done as far as just being accountable to your kiddos, but you gotta stop doing the fucking damage.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and you don't even realize you're doing it.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_05: No, I don't, and then now I see the numbing I did for for you know the 12 years that he's been, even when I was still married coming home just TV.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_05: TV, I actually had headphones so I could watch the TV without being distracted because she didn't the my ex didn't want to hear the TV.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_05: And so I just put TV headphones on and watch TV while they're playing around and they don't have energy.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_05: Oh I don't I can't do that right now.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_05: I don't want I don't have it's because I wasted it on people driving home.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_04: So I so for the folks listening that don't maybe understand the still Skittles concept, I just want to I just want to do a little recap.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_04: So um the the thing that really sticks out for me and what really started this book is that I started seeing energy as Skittles because it made it tangible for me.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_04: And there's a whole story in the book of how that came about.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_04: But um I realized that my energy is my most valuable resource and that I get to choose how to spend that.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_04: And once you do that, once you can actually visualize that because it's tangible with a with a you know, a silly visual like a Skittles, um, but once you say that, okay, I've spent those Skittles for today, you don't have them later.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_04: So, like in in initially working with Damien in the first chapter of the book is is sharing like, okay, if you're going to waste those Skittles on traffic because you your emotions are not regulated enough to be able to handle traffic, which happens every single day, um, you're you're losing your cool, you're getting angry, you're literally throwing Skittles out the window.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_04: And when you realize you only have a certain number of Skittles for that day, and you get home at the end of the day, and Damien's talking about putting on headphones and just plugging into TV and numbing out while the kids are, you know, you you've given the best parts of you to traffic and to to things before your family is even in contention for fucking Skittles, right?
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_04: And so it's like when you say, would I rather get angry in traffic or would I rather throw the ball with my kid after work?
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_04: That seems like a really logical and easy choice.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_04: And it is, it and it is, and when you realize it's that simple.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_04: Now it's is it easy?
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_04: No, it's not easy.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not suggesting that it is, but it is that simple.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_04: And so when you realize life is hard, no matter which choice you pick, right?
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_04: Is it any harder now that you've started working the book or it's hard, just different hard, right?
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so that's that's what I maintain as well.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_05: No, it's not, I think it's for me, it's I wouldn't, I guess I'm gonna say it's easy.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_05: I think it's easier.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_04: It gets easy and it does, and the more tools that you have, the easier that it is, and it's almost a game, right?
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_04: Have you got do you treat it like a game yet?
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_05: You use the word level up all the time.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_05: And every time it level I level up personally, you I go read the book again.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_05: Like if, like I said, I'm I clean pools twice a week and it's it takes me, you know, half day and the book's four hours.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I listen to it every time.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, because you're getting different nuggets uh out of it or you're being reminded of it.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_04: It's like you can listen to it from start to finish in four and a half hours.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_04: I think it's four hours, whatever.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_04: And and so I I look at this from people that I encourage to read it, where they're in a place where they're not sure, you know, or whatever, it doesn't even matter.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_04: Read the goddamn book.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_05: Just listen, read the first chapter.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_05: Listen, read it.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_04: If you don't like the first chapter, then put it down.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_04: You don't have to.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_05: Then you're not, you know, the first chapter's it, and that's even with my son, he comes with me every once in a while to clean the pools, and it's like, give that car a Skittle.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_05: And it's just one Skittle.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_05: Like, and he's like, All right, cool.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_05: And he actually is like, Oh, we should make like a Skittle launcher.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, actually launch the Skittles.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, we can try to do that.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_05: But it's just it's fun to see him realize it and it to I think he's starting to see it, and it's just like seeing what he's doing, the wants and the needs, uh, the difference between it.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_05: It's like I did that to him.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and I gotta, I'm slowly fixing it.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_05: And it's not like it's gonna, it's not a light switch, it's gonna take time.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_05: It is, and it's still I still get text messages at midnight.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_05: Hey, I want this, or hey, no, buddy.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, you know, it's he's with his mom, so he's got his phone.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_05: Um, which I that's a whole nother thing to talk about.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_05: Um but it's just listen, just read the book.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, read the book.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_05: The first chapter will get you started.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_05: You just work the first chapter and the rest of the book will fall in.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_04: Tell me, tell me the effect that it's had on your kids.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_04: Like what what have you noticed since you've started doing this?
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_04: What what differences it's had on that?
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_05: They're a lot more, they they'll have to stuff to say, but it's true.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_05: They'll talk to me.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_05: They'll say things.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_05: They'll my daughter used to just clam up and like I could just tell something's wrong, but it's she's slowly getting to where, okay, I can talk to dad.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_05: Hey, I can say this.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_05: So I did this, or I did this.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_05: And it's um before it was I'm not telling dad because he's just gonna yell at me.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_05: Right.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_05: Or my son is like, I'm not gonna ask you because you're just gonna say no, or you're just gonna yell at me.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, Well, drive me.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_05: He does that still and he's like, I don't want to go for a bike ride, we'll go.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_05: Be home at six.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_05: You know, six fifty-five rolls around, he rolls in.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_05: But it's like, hey, bud, come on, I said six, and it's you know, he's just like I was that age.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_05: My mom's like, we used to let you go.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, How did you let us go across the valley?
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_04: God, times were so different.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_04: Times were so different.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_05: I was scared, I'm like, no, you weren't, you didn't seem scared.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, nowadays, well, technology you can find him anywhere.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_05: Um, I don't like that he has a cell phone, but um but it's those little things, and I every time that he says you're not, you're gonna say no, and then I turn around and chain flip the strip on him, it's slowly kicking into his and then the other day I sent you the tech, he sent me your podcast.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and I was like, I didn't tell him to see it.
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_05: And he likes listening to stuff a bit.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, well, listen, all right, I'll listen to the podcast, go for it.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_05: And I did the one about the daughters.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, this is why I have you.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_05: That's what I do when if I go inside and she's outside, you go outside.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_05: This is what I do it for.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and he's like, I get it.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_04: You know, for for those listening that maybe haven't tapped into the podcast before or understand how powerful some of these episodes are.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I have a lot of guys that come on that are from all different walks of life and share all sorts of things.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_04: So it's not like you don't have to be into the woo, uh, you know, healing modalities that I put out there.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_04: You can, but like for somebody that's just getting started, pull up any episode that I have with a guy on there because you're talking about, you know, a guy Kirk who came on talking about masculinity and what is that supposed to look like in our in our society nowadays because things are so different, you know.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_04: Or uh, you know, somebody that came on that Carlos got he was in prison for 15 years and you talk about that man.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_04: What an incredible human being.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_04: Like, but being able to have these folks come on and listen, it's not just this show where we're talking to girls only and we're only talking about, you know, sexual trauma and stuff or whatever.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_04: Like, yes, those are components of it, but this show is really meant to.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_04: To be able to help people get curious about things because I think so many people get stuck in this life that they're living and think that is this as good as it gets because they're spending their most valuable resource, which is your Skittles, on things that don't matter.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_04: And when you realize those are choices that you have, you know, Damien and I I tell Damien and the reason that chapter one is Skittles is because that's you know, the traffic is a great place to start.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_05: But it's like, where where are the other places that you've noticed that you're able to kind of even like the stores, yeah, like the the shopping cart person that it's like all right, cool, that's you.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I do.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_05: I'll just go down the aisle and go back the other way.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_05: And yeah, just like shopping in even just in public.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_05: Like, all right, cool.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_05: You want to sit right there?
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_05: All right, cool, we're gonna go over here.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_05: We're gonna go, like you said, the chill way.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_05: Like it's traffic.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_05: The traffic for me is like the biggest one, and I think that just goes down, it just snowballs into everything else.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and like not letting you know, like kids spill something, not getting super upset.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_05: Um I had a friend, they were telling me a story, like they lost this shit because the kid spilt something.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_02: I'm like, What the fuck are you doing?
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but a couple months ago I would probably done the same thing.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_05: Like, even like uh I have a dog that loves to go through the garbage can.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_05: So if you don't put it up or I forget to, it's all over the house.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_04: When you get home.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like I used to get super upset and like yell, scream, and it's like, why?
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_05: It's he's doing what he's, you know.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_04: Well, i i again going back to you're running around at an eight or a nine.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_04: And so any one thing.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_04: So when you talk about like you're at the river and something happens with your mom and you're able to go to the hospital and do all the things, you weren't at an eight or a nine, right?
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_04: You you you've released the pressure relief valve, right?
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_04: It's like a pressure cooker.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_04: This skittle situation and just understanding things, it just relieves that pressure so that you're able to understand, okay, these are my Skittles.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_04: How do I want to spend them with intention?
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_04: And then you get to decide.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_04: It doesn't matter.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_04: But it's like literally that one concept of being able to really visualize your energy because it's not woo.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_04: You know, so many people from the outside are like, oh, energy is woo and whatever.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, I get it that you can't see it, but you can't see Wi-Fi either.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_04: And everybody taps the fuck into that.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_04: So, so you know, don't do the whole, I don't understand energy.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_04: Don't understand it, but just understand that it's it's your Skittles are your energy.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like when you when you lose your cool, when you whatever, when you don't know how to regulate your emotions, you're just fucking throwing Skittles around like a Mardi Gras uh beads, you know?
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_05: Most of those big situations like that, I don't even realize it until after the fact.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_05: Like, hey, I had I was you know running out of like a one or a zero.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_05: That's why I was able to to handle all that, and that Skittles.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_05: And I, you know, I sent you that story too, and it's like I'm Skittle found right now.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_05: We're sitting in the R waiting room, and I'm like, I'm good.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_05: And because I wasn't sleeping at that time, I was passing taking little cat naps in the waiting room, and my kids were just laughing at me.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, stop laughing so I could sleep.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_05: Because every time they would say something, I would wake up.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_05: But just those little things.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_05: It's and it's just the taking the time to learn to Skittle to know where you're spending them and make the choice.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_03: That's it.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_03: That's it.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_05: Happiness, or you want to be sitting on the couch numbing out.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_04: Numbing, absolutely.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_04: You know, when when people realize, and and I think it's just continues to get worse and worse.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_05: It means everything.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_05: It means numbings, food, clothes, shoes, clutter.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_05: Uh there's the girl that I sent the audible book to, and she's she's had a rough one.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_05: Like, even the last couple years have been rough.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_05: Even her childhood was crazy, and she was all this stuff.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, it's all numbing.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_05: You're numbing everything that's in here.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_05: You're never gonna go through this 12-foot closet of dresses.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_05: No, you're not gonna do any of that, but it's numbing.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_04: Well, and you'll never fill that hole.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_04: No, that's the thing that kills me, is like, and I get it because I've been there, right?
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_04: I thought if I had enough stuff, if I if I had the big house and the nice car and like all of the shit and just kept filling and filling and filling it, you and Cameron from the outside, yes, and seeing Cameron come on here multiple times, like I, if he can do it, yeah, big tough mountain dude, like drop me off with the pocket knife, I can make it home.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like I can do it.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and and you I told you when this first started, I'm like, I remember the table story.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_05: You're like, what are you talking about?
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_05: You have a table that you've had since day one that you don't, but you also like clean, clean, just clean everything, yeah, mega dump everything that you got.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_05: And it's amazing.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_05: I filled up my dump trailer twice since this has happened, and it's just cleaning out the clutter.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_05: And then I go out where the clutter was, and I'm like, oh, I feel so light and airy, and it's like, okay, great.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_05: I don't need to put anything back there.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_05: But it's that, and then I can spread out everything else I got to have more to do the things that I want to do instead of having to worry about I got to move this, this, and this, and this to do a project that I want to work on that builds my skills.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_05: It's so it's and I had to uh I want another dump trailer or a dumpster just to fill it up to get it out of there because it's and then my mom's like, well, bring it up here, take it.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_05: No, I don't want to, I don't have time for that.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_05: I don't want to take it to Goodwill.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_04: You don't need the extra weight.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_04: You don't need the extra weight.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I think I think when we when we get really twisted up in our numb of choice or numbs of choice, uh, and then we model that behavior for our kids, it feels really sad to me.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_04: You know, we took we talk about your son, and it's like you were always looking at the things online for uh Facebook Marketplace or whatever it is, and like, oh, we could get this, we could get this, and it was always something, right?
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_04: And then those things just sit.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_04: That's what Damien's talking about about getting out and getting the dump trucks and getting shit out of there because it's like you're trying to fill something.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_04: It isn't like I really want that, it's just whatever the next thing is that's gonna give you that hit.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_04: And I understand that, but um, it's really dangerous place to be because your life is no longer your own once you get to that place, you know.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_04: And I watch like um gambling now that they have where you can just do gambling on your phone, and I'm like, oh you guys, this is so dangerous.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_04: Like it's so fucking dangerous because we're just filling, everybody's just numbing, numbing.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_04: Let's be real.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_04: Life doesn't come with a manual, but it does come with chaos.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_04: I wrote this book because I got tired of drowning and everyone else's noise and needed a way to fix my own shit.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_04: This isn't some sugar-coated self-help nonsense.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_04: It's raw, it's honest, and it's absolutely tools that actually work in the middle of real life.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_04: If you're ready to stop playing small, take back your energy and get unapologetically.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_04: This book is your playbook.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_04: You can pick up your copy of the Life Hack playbook on Amazon or on our podcast website, let's get nakedpodcast.com.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_05: Numbing, numbing, numbing.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_05: No, it's everything.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_05: Every every part of your thing could be numbing, like from like anything.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but it's just even TV.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like I would just sit there, you know, before with the headphones.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_05: It's like just sit there and watch TV or the kids are there.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_05: We've been we sat on, I think it was last Sunday, we sat down and watched a couple episodes of um the Deadliest Catch.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_05: My daughter likes that one.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, okay, I can't do this much longer because I'm I feel like I'm gonna start numbing out.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_05: And then I was like, oh, just relax.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_05: You're here with your kids, you're not by yourself, just sitting here.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_05: I don't watch TV.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I don't watch But you're doing what you're saying right now is with intention.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_04: That's the beautiful part because it's not like any of these things are bad.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not saying any of it is bad.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_04: It's like when you use it as a number, though, and you know that you're doing that because you feel like garbage when you get up from doing that.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_04: It isn't like I'm gonna sit down and watch an episode or two.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_04: It's like I'm going to spend four, six hours after after work because I don't have fucking time, you know, energy to do anything else, just zombieing out.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_04: If you feel like a zombie, yeah, uh, you know, touch base with yourself.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_05: When they were doing that, I'm like, hey you guys, I'm gonna go journal.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, you know, finish the show.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_05: I'm gonna go take 15 minutes and journal for a minute.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_01: And I tell them, yes, yes, that's the best part.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_05: Tell them what you're doing, and like, hey, I'm going to the gym.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_05: Hey, I'm at the gym.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_05: And my son's like, oh, what's going on?
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_05: He's like, I want to be.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_05: And he's like, What do you, you know, watch, you know, be hard on me, Dad about not eating.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_05: I'll be harder on you, but you're not gonna like it.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_05: And it's, you know, eating a bag of chips at one sitting.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_05: What are you doing?
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, you know, and it's like, well, eat healthy.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_05: He's like, and we both, when I cold turkey, I cold turkey soda, which wasn't, I just did it.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_05: I didn't want to, I didn't say, hey, I'm gonna do soda too.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_05: I just did it.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like, I guarantee if I had a soda today, it'd make me feel extra.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_05: Same thing with him.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_05: He does he was always soda, soda, soda.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_05: Now it's tea or water when we go places.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_05: And we go to place, I go intentionally go to places that have good tea because I, you know, if I don't want water, and it's not this, it's amazing.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and the I feel better, I wake up energized, even if I get three hours of sleep, I'm like, all right, let's go.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_05: Like I didn't sleep much last night because thinking about all this stuff, and it was uh I feel great.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_05: I gotta go back to work after this.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_05: So I'm just ready to go.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you when you when you realize that uh again, you get to spend with intention.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_04: It's just it's these little choices.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I think I think so many people um are busy looking in your cup to see if you have more than them, right?
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_04: There's that whole saying about like I looked in your cup to make sure you had enough, you looked in mine to see if I had more than you.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_04: Um not coming from that place.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_04: It's like just making certain that you I think I shit the bet on that whole analogy.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_04: Damn, let's just scrap that and pretend like that one thing.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_04: And by scrap that, I mean we're not gonna scrap that.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_04: You're gonna have to listen to this because we don't fucking edit this stuff out.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_05: No, we're scraping it.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_05: Um it's yeah, it's amazing.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_05: I and I to see my kids, uh, especially my son, to transition and see these things and notice them and then replay them.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_05: Like we had a birthday party from my daughter, and there was a bounce house outside, and there's three older kids.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_05: They were one year older than my brother my son, and he didn't have his phone.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_05: He actually got taken away for watching YouTube too much.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_05: Um they would play for 15 minutes and go on their phone for 30 minutes.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_05: And then my son would get frustrated because they his friends didn't want to do anything, go for bike rides because they were on their phones.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_05: And like, all right, buddy, then we just gotta find you different friends.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that's all it is.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_05: And it's I'll do whatever you have where you want, I'll take you wherever uh his one buddy goes up to Williams a bunch on his farm.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_05: Like, I'll drive you up there if you want to stay for a week and go for it.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, it just to make him stay out of that to where that is.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_05: Because we didn't have I didn't have a phone when I was growing up.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_05: We had my bike and we ride everywhere.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and that's what I want him to do.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_05: He's loved it.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_05: He's like, Dad, I just did an hour and a half.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_05: You think that's great?
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, that's great energy.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, he's a big kid, like he's almost as big as me, if not bigger.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_05: And he gave me the hug every day yesterday or the other day, and he squeezed me.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, You can't squeeze me, buddy.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_05: He can't, he's gonna be a tall kid, so he's growing into it, but and it it's just slowly getting into the habits and teaching him, like, hey, you can't just sit around and do nothing.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_05: And the attention that was when I was doing that with my daughter watching the shows, I was like, I can't do this, it's numbing.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_05: But when you said intentionally numbing, like even in the book, I've said heard that multiple a hundred times.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, what does she mean by that?
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_05: But now I understand.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_05: Like it just that just clicked.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_05: So it's now I can go back to the book, look into that again, and it's like I just leveled up even more.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_04: You know, when you treat it like a game, I just think it's so much fun.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_04: It's so much fun because it's like, you know, everyone's like, ah, fuck life.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_04: And I'm like, are you crazy?
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_04: I get to do this.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_04: Life doesn't do me, I do it, you know.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_04: And so being able to say, like, okay, where am I going to spend my resource?
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_04: Where am I going to make improvements or do things?
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_04: And and when you come from this place of I get to instead of I have to, it just it it does, it changes the whole damn game.
• 32:53
  SPEAKER_05: And the gratitude thing that you talk about is a major thing.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_05: I always when I journal, I put at least four or five of those up the day.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_05: It's like you've got to go to work.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, it's like you said, it's it's it's not it's the simple things, but I got to go to work.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_05: I could not have work today and not to sit at home stressing about how to find work.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, um, so it's it's those like I got to hang out with my kids, I got to talk to my kids.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_05: And it, you know, six months ago, it's like, oh, they didn't, you know, we have phone calls every night.
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, I didn't get to talk to them tonight.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, there's some parents that don't talk to their kids at all for a week.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_04: And you're and when you realize you're the one holding the goddamn paintbrush of your life, how are you going to paint it, right?
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_04: So you can do this whole like, oh, I didn't get to do this or oh, I didn't get to do that.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, do you really want to look at it from that perspective?
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_04: Or would you rather look at it from the perspective of look at all of these things that I get, right?
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_04: And that's the whole gratitude journal practice.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_04: And for people that um don't have a gratitude journal journal practice, start it.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_04: Like that's non-negotiable for me.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_05: Even if it's in your journal, right?
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_05: And any anywhere, like 100%.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_05: And the the notes in your phone, I did that for there's a big one in there that I I just I go back and redo it.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_05: I just keep adding to it because it's something that's been it's been in my head for a couple, you know, like a month or two.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_05: That's just I can't get out.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_05: It's just keeps repeating, keeps repeating, and just putting it in there.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_05: And the when that first happened, I wrote a you know a big page about it and I burnt it.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_05: And I can't tell you what's on that page now.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's gone.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's it's it's fun to like hand down the gratitude thing to your kiddos too.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_04: So for me, it's like I've turned it into uh I implemented it in as many ways as I possibly can.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_04: We talk about that kind of stuff around the dinner table.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_04: Um, I have a jar at the house with the little notes next to it so that people can write their debuts on there, their wins for whatever happened that day or whatever it is.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_04: I just think really being uh, you know, so rooted in gratitude, it just changes the whole entire game because there's so many people on this planet that have it worse.
• 34:43
  SPEAKER_04: And I want to be able to be my best version that I can so that I can do everything that I can to help make things better.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_04: And just even looking at you over the last couple of months as you've improved, you're better not only for yourself and your kiddos, which will then continue to pass that down, but everyone in your family, everyone that you see, everyone that you touch and in, you know, work-wise throughout your day.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely, and it's like you just share it with people.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_05: Like I had to get some parts for the truck yesterday.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, thanks, Jay.
• 35:11
  SPEAKER_05: I didn't know his name.
• 35:12
  SPEAKER_05: And the name thing is that when you were talking the book, I'm the same way.
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but switching it.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_05: I was in a parking lot of our supply house for a pool, pool supply, and there's a big complex next door.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_05: The dad walks over, hey, can you do this?
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_05: This there's 400, there's a thousand guys that roll through that place every day.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, he picked me out, and I was like, all right, cool.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_05: And then I remembered his name, repeated it back to him.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_05: I guarantee that's why I got the job.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's and it was spelt so great.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_05: And then remembering people, even just saying, Hey, how's your going?
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_05: And like, uh I was getting dinner and I was like, Hey, how's he was saying, Hey, how's your day?
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_05: I'm doing great, man.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_05: How was your day?
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_05: And he was like, Man, thanks for asking.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and it was like just so, and then it just makes like I'm getting goosebumps now, thinking about it.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_05: When I get when I'm in my lows, that's what gets me back up.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_05: Because I forced myself to do it.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, because then it used to be over the weekend when I camping, I didn't know two of the families that was there, very not very much at all.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_05: Super quiet.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_05: And I was like, what are you doing?
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_05: You're super quiet, you're not playing.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_05: And then like 30 minutes before I left, their kids came around and I started playing with their um the kids.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like, it was like, I wish I could stay longer, but I had to go to get my stuff ready for the week.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_05: And it was just I was like, Yeah, that was you know, I was really quiet.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_05: That's who I used to be.
• 36:27
  SPEAKER_05: But now it's like, hey, how's it going?
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_05: What's going on?
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_05: You know, at the anywhere, just the gas station, just repeating, and then seeing the smile on the person's face because you re you asked them is is life changing.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_05: It's it's so it's such a small choice, yeah, to say that back to somebody.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, even the first uh I was fishing at Blue Ray, Blue Ridge and Reservoir, and this guy in this big truck came down.
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_05: This there was barely in the room for us.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_05: So I was way over, and he rolls down his window.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_05: Huge handlebar mustache.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_05: Huge handlebar, and I was like, Where'd you get that at?
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_05: He's like, Walmart.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, What's the good deal?
• 37:02
  SPEAKER_05: How much was that?
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_05: And we went back for a couple minutes, and it was like just that little trance like it lit up my day.
• 37:08
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't know who he is.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_05: I'll probably never see him again, but it lit up.
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_05: I know by see him, I'll know who he is.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_02: You'll know that you'll know him by the mustache.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_05: And it was it was just those little things, putting yourself out there, being open.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_05: That's the number one thing I've learned from your book and then untethered soul, being open.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, have an open mind, open heart.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_05: It changes everything.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_04: It changes everything when you realize that we have all of these like these triggers and this like blanket layer defensiveness, right?
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_04: That the big angry truck guy for me is just rolling around with a blanket defensive layer, right?
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_04: And again, I like work through it with Cameron, which is why I'm inspired.
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_04: Because I'm like, oh, I can get you guys now.
• 37:45
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like fishing.
• 37:46
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_05: And I remember stories from when you know being up north doing the the spa up there for you guys.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_05: I remember Cameron telling me stories.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, damn.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, he's always, you know, I don't carry a gun or anything like that.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_05: And I was like, I'm glad I didn't.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, right because it's you know, at some point, I don't know what would happen.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_05: That would change.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_04: You can melt your whole life down real quick.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_05: Real quick.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_05: Real quick.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_04: So it's like if you're if you're already running around at an eight or a nine, you know, yes, that's fucked up stuff that you're carrying around, but then you just have like this blanket uh layer of defensiveness, right?
• 38:17
  SPEAKER_04: So it's a blanket trigger.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_04: That's exactly what it is over your entire fucking life.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_04: So when you're talking about staying open, it is just a different way to engage with life.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_04: Um you don't need to protect yourself, right?
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_04: Stay open from a perspective of having those interactions and being uh intentional about how you're spending stuff and and and really creating the life of that you want instead of um instead of just being angry all the time.
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_05: And the other the thing for me is the like who gives a fuck what people think?
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like fuck them.
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_05: You could never catch me six months ago with my shirt off, walking around my neighborhood.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_05: I take my dogs for a walk with my shirt off.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, like I'm I'll drive home with my shirt off.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like fucking hot.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_05: I'm just taking it off.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_05: I like even walking around the house with the shirt off and everything like that, it's like I never used to do that.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_05: Now it's like fuck it, you don't like it.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_05: Go the other way.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, go the other way.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_05: The kids in the neighborhood, I'll walk outside with my shorts on because it's hot and they're playing in the water.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_05: Like, oh, what's going on, Dad?
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_05: You look good.
• 39:11
  SPEAKER_05: Like the other kids say that.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like, okay, great.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_05: That's amazing.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_05: It's but even like walking, getting out of the gym, taking my shirt off and walking to my truck because I'm hot.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, I don't care.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, there's dudes in there that are way jacked more than I am.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_05: Who gives what?
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_05: We haven't been through what I've been through.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_05: Absolutely.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_05: I don't know what they've been through.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_05: Absolutely, same.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_05: It's no comparison.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's it's no comparison.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_04: It's like I think so many people get so twisted up and oh, well, they must have it easier because they're what we're all just living this messy life.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_04: We none of us have it figured out.
• 39:39
  SPEAKER_04: We're literally just doing whatever the next right thing is that we think and trying to do it as best as we can.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_05: And the the confidence the two years ago when you emailed me, I was down.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_05: Like I was literally, I can picture it today, sitting on my couch, numbing, watching TV.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_05: It's probably high as a kite.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_05: And I was you emailed me about uh doing some stuff with social media, and I was like, great.
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_05: You saved my life then.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_05: And the book, I bought it, didn't read it, didn't touch it, and then another crap thing happened in my life.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, fuck it, hit play.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, it was I was like, I'm not gonna do it.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_05: And I hit it and it changed, saved my life again.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_05: And I lost confidence, didn't have confidence back then, two years ago.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_05: My confidence now is through the roof.
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_05: Like I can talk, you know.
• 40:22
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, I'm not talking to you about your pool anymore.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_05: You don't want to listen, you don't want to build it the way I want to, you don't want to understand what I'm trying to tell you.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_05: You call me now, I'll talk to you for an hour about it.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_05: Like, let's go.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_05: You don't want to understand, you don't understand, I'll explain it to you so you understand what you're getting, what you're buying, and not to go with the dude that's$2,000 cheaper because you're saving$2,000.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_05: And it happens all the time.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_05: Um but having that confidence and that like, all right, cool, you know, I got my positive energy, like there's so many stories about just being open and positive around people.
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_05: Um there's another one uh in Sedona that happened where it was a major opportunity.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_05: And my I didn't even pick my foot, I don't think my foot's in the door, but my business card's in front of somebody.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_05: And that's all I care.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_05: Like that's all.
• 41:08
  SPEAKER_05: And then following up with the lady the other day, um I got a response from her right away, amazing response.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like, okay, great.
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like, I'll send you pictures of what we're gonna do for my mom's pool, and then we'll do it for you in a year up there.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_05: And I'm great.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_05: And it was just because my energy when I walked into that place.
• 41:29
  SPEAKER_04: You know, it's wild because so many people can feel energy.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_04: And if your energy smells like dog shit and you don't even realize it, it's hindering your life.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_05: Six months ago, I'd think you're crazy.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but it's true.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, you walk in with that, and I can when I'm having a down day, um my mom, any anybody around can they'll tell me, like, I noticed it.
• 41:48
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, I noticed too.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah on Mother's Day.
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_05: I had a great day with my mom and my brother and his girlfriend.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_05: And then towards the end of the day, it was just I just nosedived.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_05: And like, yeah, I noticed it.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_05: I know what was going on.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_05: I couldn't do anything about it, but it took it took a little bit longer, you know, the next day to get out of it.
• 42:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and it was like, okay, that was a low, but the highs the highs are high.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_04: You can't like you can't you can't argue with that shit.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_04: Like, like for those that are listening, you know, you got off of everything that you were using for everything, and you're at this place where just being intentional with how you use your energy, the highs are so fucking high you can't even get your head around it.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_04: And Damien's only been working this for, again, two months.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_04: So this stuff where I'm up here just plain and on fucking high for the majority of the time, only because I've been doing it for longer, and I understand, but but it's it's it's so powerful when you realize that and when you realize that your energy and what you bring to things makes everything in your life easier.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_04: It literally makes everything in your life easier.
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_04: So it's like, I just want to yell from the rooftops, like just read the goddamn book.
• 42:48
  SPEAKER_04: If it's about the fucking money, send me a, you know, send me a send me a thing, I'll put I'll pay for it.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_04: Exactly.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_04: Damien's like, put me into contact with whoever I need to be.
• 42:56
  SPEAKER_04: If somebody needs to like talk about it, like I'm happy to share with you because it's just literally that big of a difference.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_04: Um, it's day and night.
• 43:03
  SPEAKER_05: It's for like, I mean, I'm a blue-collar worker and I, you know, I'm sure a majority of them don't want to read.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_05: Don't have oh, I don't have the time.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_05: I don't have this.
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_05: You can get the audible.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_05: You can get the audible, you're in your truck.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_05: You all have phones, you all have smartphones, you all have Bluetooth.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_04: Put it in that big angry truck that you drive around.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_05: Stop listening to the garbage music, right?
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_05: And just play it.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and I don't I'll let it play when I'm out of the truck.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_05: I don't care who hears it.
• 43:25
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, absolutely.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_04: Well, when you realize we just get one crack at this life.
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_04: Do you know what I mean?
• 43:29
  SPEAKER_05: And when that sets in, yeah, especially with having the kids, my kids and and stuff like that, it's like, oh shit, yeah, you do.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, this is the last, you know, this is Sunday.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_05: I can't have that back anymore.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_05: I'm gonna do the best I can today, even though it's hard or I'm down or it's and I'm in the lower the lower roller coaster, I'm gonna still do what I gotta do to do it.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but then those when that roller coaster comes back up super fast and flies, it's it's amazing.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_04: It's savage, right?
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_04: So it's funny because in doing the work with Cameron and doing my own work, and I same, I do it at full.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_04: Volume in front of my family because I don't want anyone that there's nothing shameful about what it is that I'm doing.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_04: It isn't.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_04: It's like I want them to know I'm working on myself and I want to be my best version of myself for me and for them.
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_04: But for me, I got to this place where understanding the different perspectives and which perspective do I want to engage with this life from.
• 44:16
  SPEAKER_04: And the one that I found that is the most fun for me is the eight-year-old version.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_04: Because the eight-year-old version is just fun.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_04: It's innocent.
• 44:24
  SPEAKER_04: It's coming from this place of awe and wonder and curiosity every single day.
• 44:35
  SPEAKER_04: And, you know, the programming and stuff that came.
• 44:38
  SPEAKER_04: And so my what really does it for me is to be able to help other men find their eight-year-old boy.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_04: So when you send me on the weekends a picture of you fishing with your kids or you're smiling, that's the eight-year-old boy, right?
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_04: It is when I take my husband and we go to the Braves game in Atlanta and, you know, take him there for Father's Day and he's there living his dream, right?
• 44:59
  SPEAKER_04: Just living his fucking dream.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_04: Uh and it doesn't have to be anything big like that.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_04: It can be in the little stuff too, you going for a bike ride and not taking your phone with you and just like having fun pedaling around.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_04: It's like that's the eight-year-old perspective where you can really just clean the gunk up on from on top of you.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_04: And so when I talk to these men and I see these men, you can just feel their energy that are so fucking beat down and so much weight on their shoulders.
• 45:22
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I talk about invisible weight and I I love the defensive guys that are like, fuck you, you don't know what you're talking about.
• 45:27
  SPEAKER_04: Like, I can't do something on the audible.
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_04: Please just put the phone.
• 45:31
  SPEAKER_04: I know what I'm doing.
• 45:31
  SPEAKER_04: You know what I'm saying?
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_04: I have I have a I have a dad who, you know, my dad read read the book for the first time.
• 45:35
  SPEAKER_04: He's 79 years old.
• 45:36
  SPEAKER_04: He goes, honey, you changed my life.
• 45:39
  SPEAKER_04: And I just I love that so much, right?
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_04: I I I I my my I have a great, a gay brother, a straight brother.
• 45:45
  SPEAKER_04: It's worked on both of them, right?
• 45:46
  SPEAKER_04: My my husband, who, like you said, give him a leatherman and put him out in the middle of the woods, that man's coming back.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, you know, he's that kind of a savage guy.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_05: With like a yeah, all of the things, right?
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_04: And and and so if it worked on him, and I can pull out his eight-year-old boy.
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_05: I feel fortunate and great gratitude or grateful that I know him personally.
• 46:08
  SPEAKER_05: Like I know that he could do that.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and him sitting here going through the book, going this, doing that, it's like it, I can do it.
• 46:15
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 46:16
  SPEAKER_04: I believe that, and it's the reason why I wanted you to come on the show today.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_04: Because it's like I want other men to be able to, they're not gonna listen to me.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_04: That's okay.
• 46:24
  SPEAKER_04: You don't have to listen to me.
• 46:25
  SPEAKER_04: Listen to Damien, right?
• 46:26
  SPEAKER_04: When you when you look at what a difference that's made for your kids, because when when you tell me that your daughter or your son made a comment to your mom about how much better you're doing, and you're only two months in, Damien, you're only two months in, you know, it only goes up from here.
• 46:41
  SPEAKER_04: And again, it doesn't mean you're not gonna have bad days, but it's like but it's like your worst day now is still fucking better than when your best best day before, you know.
• 46:50
  SPEAKER_04: And so it's like when you realize that that's possible and it doesn't take anything harder than what you were already doing, just different.
• 46:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yep.
• 46:56
  SPEAKER_04: And also then just gets easier, you know, because the more that you do, it's like a like a snowball at the top of a hill.
• 47:03
  SPEAKER_04: It just is gain, it just keeps getting bigger and gaining steam, and you get more tools and and all of the things.
• 47:08
  SPEAKER_04: And you watch this as your kids look at you differently, right?
• 47:11
  SPEAKER_04: To me, that was always a thing when I when my kids would look at me like, you're not gonna get angry about that.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, no, because I used to be the one that got worked up and and yelled, and and if everything didn't work out exactly like I wanted to, it you know, I'd lose my cool.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like, for what?
• 47:25
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, for what?
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_04: My kids and my family are my most important thing, right?
• 47:30
  SPEAKER_04: Act accordingly, right?
• 47:32
  SPEAKER_04: And that's what that does is by taking tools that you have, right?
• 47:36
  SPEAKER_04: This is this is the tool.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I listen to people and I and I I've come from this place where yes, I got into a lot of self-improvement books.
• 47:44
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but I realize that as the gen pop is concerned, they're not gonna go, oh, tell me what what you know, self-improvement book I should.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_04: This isn't that.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_04: This is just it it pulls all of the things together.
• 47:56
  SPEAKER_05: For me, for me, listening to the Undertethered Sold and a couple other ones, I can't remember the name.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_05: For me, they're too wordy.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_05: I can't Undertether sold, I gotta listen to a couple times before I understand it.
• 48:06
  SPEAKER_05: But for me, it looks, it sounds for me, it's you took all those books and reduced it into that.
• 48:11
  SPEAKER_05: You did like to where you can understand it.
• 48:13
  SPEAKER_04: That's exactly common sense.
• 48:15
  SPEAKER_04: It is, and I'm very visual learner, so I put all of these things in where it's like, let me share this, let me share that.
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_04: Um, this is how my brain sees it again, that eight-year-old brain that's just like make it make sense kind of shit.
• 48:25
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but it's worked, it's worked.
• 48:27
  SPEAKER_04: And I and I watch as it works for people at my front door, and it's men and it's women.
• 48:32
  SPEAKER_04: My my favorite are men because you know, you guys just make it a challenge.
• 48:35
  SPEAKER_04: You make me work for it, and I appreciate that.
• 48:38
  SPEAKER_04: You know, it's not like, oh, we're just gonna give in.
• 48:40
  SPEAKER_04: We're just we're gonna make you work for it, and that's okay too.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I mean the work's amazing.
• 48:44
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's not fun, no, um, especially cold churching and everything, was not fun.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_05: I didn't sleep for I think five days, and it was it was not a lot of late calls to my mom.
• 48:54
  SPEAKER_05: Um, she's been my backbone for most of it.
• 48:57
  SPEAKER_05: And it's kind of hard because she's your mom, my mom.
• 48:59
  SPEAKER_05: She's always gonna tell me, you know, like I I don't want to hear that from right.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_05: But like, and she's like, just stop it.
• 49:04
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, well, it's easy for you to say, but it's she's the one that I always call, always there, don't call me at five o'clock or don't text me at five o'clock, I'm still sleeping.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_05: So it's just those things.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_05: And I have, you know, staying up on night, I have to wait to where I can, hey, my this, this, and this happened.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_05: But even I wasn't doing journal then.
• 49:20
  SPEAKER_05: But even if I think if I was doing the journaling during that, it would help me be able to sleep.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_05: But it was, you know, three years of numbing, and the alcohol was never the alcohol was towards the end.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_05: But it was three years of smoking gummies where I'm taking 50 to 100 milligrams to sleep, and it's like I'm like, what are you doing?
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_05: And then now looking back, I'm like, and I was like numbing, and so like, like, oh my kids don't know that I smoke weed.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, you fucking idiot.
• 49:48
  SPEAKER_05: It's you can smell that shit from a mile away.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_01: And also kids are really smart.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_05: You know, it's like I go outside in the shed, do this and this and this, and I wait a minute and come back.
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, take no.
• 49:57
  SPEAKER_05: And then it's like for me, it was like the worst part was I didn't want them to go to my their mom's house and be somewhere, like, oh, what's that?
• 50:03
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, that's what that smells like.
• 50:04
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like you're and looking back, I'm like, you're that was another three years of like just numbing.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_05: I mean, I guess it was part of the par of the course, like I had like it's had to happen, but now it's like fuck, I'm so much better, so much and it's like I don't even go into that chat anymore.
• 50:20
  SPEAKER_05: And it's like I just don't even I know people that still do it.
• 50:24
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, I don't need it anymore.
• 50:25
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't what does it do for you?
• 50:28
  SPEAKER_05: It doesn't do you're just numbing.
• 50:29
  SPEAKER_05: You you need to fix your shit to get away from it.
• 50:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_05: Once you fix your shit, it'll be your life will be so much easier.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, it gets better and easier.
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_04: So I just want to read the I just want to read the um the chapters.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_04: So there's there's an intro and a conclusion, but then there's just ten chapters.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_04: So energy equals Skittles, right?
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_04: Which is explains energy in a way that you can actually work with your and again, I think that's the most powerful chapter.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_05: It dumbs it down.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_05: It does.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_05: To where you can even the you know you can understand everything in that place.
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_04: Thousand percent, right?
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_04: Like I'm I'm a I don't have a a degree, I'm not a psychiatrist, I'm not a psychologist, like none of the things.
• 51:03
  SPEAKER_04: This is just common sense stuff for me of like how did this work?
• 51:06
  SPEAKER_04: But it is from hundreds of personal improvement books because I've been on a journey of figuring myself out.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_04: And when I'm putting myself into something, it's like a thousand percent, you know, I'm going a hundred miles.
• 51:17
  SPEAKER_05: It's priceless.
• 51:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I I agree with you.
• 51:19
  SPEAKER_04: So uh savage self-awareness is the second one.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_04: And again, it's like so many people just aren't even aware of where they're spending their things and don't understand that like you get to make your life however you want it to be.
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_04: You're you're choosing to keep it where you are.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_04: So if you're 100% happy, then great.
• 51:32
  SPEAKER_04: If you're not a hundred percent happy, you know that you can, yes, read the book.
• 51:36
  SPEAKER_04: Uh fix your shit, right?
• 51:37
  SPEAKER_04: Which it just talks about triggers and that your triggers are your own responsibility.
• 51:41
  SPEAKER_04: It's not the other person, it's you.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, EQ, emotional intelligence, it's a big one, right?
• 51:46
  SPEAKER_04: Understanding that we weren't, yeah, we weren't given that growing up, especially in our generation.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_04: It was like, don't be a pussy, you know, man up, rub some dirt on it.
• 51:53
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like those emotions are actually your compass.
• 51:56
  SPEAKER_04: And if you know how to use them appropriately, you can have anything in life.
• 51:59
  SPEAKER_04: I guarantee it.
• 52:00
  SPEAKER_04: You know, you'll just navigate life in a in in a such a more beautiful way.
• 52:03
  SPEAKER_04: Um, the fifth chapter is perspective, right?
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_04: Which is the I get to instead of I have to.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_05: Yep.
• 52:08
  SPEAKER_05: Fifth and sixth were were major too in the very beginning.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 52:11
  SPEAKER_05: I remember that's in my like the second page of my journal, like chapter one and then five and six.
• 52:15
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 52:15
  SPEAKER_04: As number six is mental strength and stop it, you know, because that's a that's a whole thing.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_04: And again, I put a visual in there to help you kind of get your mental strength under control because it's just like a muscle when you go to the gym, it's weak as fuck at first.
• 52:26
  SPEAKER_04: And it but it just keep hitting at it, hitting at it, hitting at it.
• 52:29
  SPEAKER_04: Because now I'm at this place where um, you know, I've been doing this for several years, but my mental strength is savage.
• 52:35
  SPEAKER_04: Like I chuckle to myself how savage it is.
• 52:38
  SPEAKER_05: You know, from talking to you, you know, every once in a while.
• 52:40
  SPEAKER_05: It's I see it.
• 52:41
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, fuck I'm I want to be there.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_04: Yes, yes, because it's it's a it's a real it's a real nice life from this perspective.
• 52:48
  SPEAKER_04: And it is to it takes work, but it's like, what else was I gonna be doing?
• 52:50
  SPEAKER_04: Complaining about traffic.
• 52:51
  SPEAKER_04: Um, number seven is judgment, and that's the whole that's the tree thing and being able to understand that.
• 52:56
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it took me a little bit to understand it, but now I catch myself like starting to no tree.
• 53:01
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, thank you.
• 53:02
  SPEAKER_05: Start to judge, and then I think, nope, they're just a different tree.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you, Connie.
• 53:05
  SPEAKER_04: Connie is this amazing, lovely woman who uh is so important to my husband and I.
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_04: And uh um, she's the one who told me about that.
• 53:13
  SPEAKER_04: And it was when I was finalizing the the book, and I was like, I'm definitely putting the tree in there.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_04: So that's an important one to know.
• 53:20
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, number eight is stay in your lane.
• 53:22
  SPEAKER_04: Understanding that is such a beautiful thing, not only for other people, like, nope, keep out of my lane, please, and also let me keep in my lane, right?
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_05: Um that one's still it's still in work in progress on that one too, but it's just it and then I catch myself, all right, stay in, you know.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_05: Yep, and saying the words to yourself, absolutely like stop it, Skittles, like you're throwing Skittles, and like people might think you're crazy or and that for the longest for the first couple bit, I was like, I'm not gonna say Skittles, they're gonna think I'm fucked.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_05: It's my Skittles.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_04: It's my Skittles, absolutely.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_04: I think my energy people all over the all over the country now, and further that say, you know, talk about the Skittles.
• 53:54
  SPEAKER_04: And to me, it just makes my heart happy.
• 53:55
  SPEAKER_04: It's like, welcome to the Skittles gang.
• 53:57
  SPEAKER_05: It's the only candy I eat now, too.
• 54:00
  SPEAKER_04: Which is awesome.
• 54:01
  SPEAKER_04: Um, yeah, could Skittles, can I get a sponsorship?
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_04: For God's sakes.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_04: Um, okay, the number nine is the cup and just understanding that you have to fill your cup first.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_04: You can't give from from something that you don't have.
• 54:12
  SPEAKER_04: And then number 10 is setting yourself up for success, right?
• 54:14
  SPEAKER_04: And really, and really understanding that um it is a game.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_04: This life is a game if you're able to do that as a choice.
• 54:20
  SPEAKER_05: It is.
• 54:20
  SPEAKER_05: It's it's just it's like you it's so easy when you do this, you put the two hands, like having you know, having fun with your kids or yelling at somebody in traffic.
• 54:29
  SPEAKER_05: Like it's it's a fucking choice.
• 54:30
  SPEAKER_05: It's it's just the choice, and that's it.
• 54:32
  SPEAKER_05: Like there's no in there's no in between.
• 54:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 54:35
  SPEAKER_05: And before for me, there was so much in between.
• 54:36
  SPEAKER_05: I'll be all right.
• 54:37
  SPEAKER_05: I'm gonna know it's a choice.
• 54:38
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and to know for 10 years when I was driving home, just angry, yelling at everybody, stressed out, tired, I was wasting and letting work, you know, consume me.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_05: It was it was it's hard, it was that was a lot of emotional uh EQ that I've learned.
• 54:56
  SPEAKER_05: Like, hey, you gotta let that stuff go.
• 54:58
  SPEAKER_05: You can't do nothing with that.
• 55:00
  SPEAKER_05: Now moving forward, it's not like even today, driving here is merging.
• 55:05
  SPEAKER_04: I knew I was gonna get you guys in the merging traffic.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_04: I fucking love it.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_05: And it it's happened two, three times since like listening to that.
• 55:12
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like, it happened with me and my son, and the dude just went right behind me and like just start laughing.
• 55:18
  SPEAKER_05: Yep, and I was like, all right, bud, cool.
• 55:20
  SPEAKER_04: Well, some welcome to the party.
• 55:23
  SPEAKER_05: It's and that you I used to be that dude.
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, fuck, you're not passing me.
• 55:27
  SPEAKER_05: You're not cutting in line.
• 55:28
  SPEAKER_05: I know, you're not getting in front of me.
• 55:29
  SPEAKER_04: So it's funny because Damien, I I put this post out there about uh merging traffic and the and the guy that's like blocks, you know, blocks the middle lane or the you know, both of the lanes a mile back from merging and whatever.
• 55:40
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, who is that guy?
• 55:40
  SPEAKER_04: Damien's like, I'm that guy.
• 55:42
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, please let me help fix this because you don't have to be that guy.
• 55:45
  SPEAKER_04: That's a choice to be that guy.
• 55:48
  SPEAKER_04: And and as soon as you realize that, you know, but but it is, it's it's funny because we joke around about it and also super savage when you realize you're giving the best part of who you are to stupid shit that doesn't matter.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_05: And the people that need it are that that are at home waiting for you, right?
• 56:04
  SPEAKER_04: And and then you don't have anything left to give them, and so you just go home and plug into the TV with your headphones.
• 56:09
  SPEAKER_04: It's like, would you rather have that life?
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_04: Or would you rather have a life where it's like if somebody cuts you off, it's like, get on in here, boss.
• 56:15
  SPEAKER_04: I've been saving this spot for you all fucking day.
• 56:17
  SPEAKER_05: And I think that's the key to to to letting that build even faster is saying those things.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_04: 100%.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_04: And yeah, go for it.
• 56:23
  SPEAKER_04: That's your spot.
• 56:24
  SPEAKER_04: Love Muffin, I've been waiting for you.
• 56:26
  SPEAKER_04: Come on in here.
• 56:30
  SPEAKER_04: 100%.
• 56:31
  SPEAKER_04: And then get on in there.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_04: Get on in there, whatever you want.
• 56:34
  SPEAKER_05: And you know you're pissing half of the people off.
• 56:36
  SPEAKER_04: Don't care.
• 56:36
  SPEAKER_05: And I yeah, it doesn't care.
• 56:38
  SPEAKER_05: Exactly what you say.
• 56:39
  SPEAKER_05: They made the merger point here for some reason.
• 56:41
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 56:41
  SPEAKER_05: So I'm gonna go up there and merge.
• 56:43
  SPEAKER_04: And that's okay that everyone says where you should or where you shouldn't, and what the qualities are, and it's like whatever.
• 56:47
  SPEAKER_04: It's like, I don't give a fuck.
• 56:49
  SPEAKER_04: If it's merged, if it if we're backed up for two miles in the one lane, there's three entrances onto the freeway onto those places.
• 56:55
  SPEAKER_04: What are those poor people supposed to do?
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_04: And I know people just cringe at this point because people are all driving around at an eight or a nine, but it's like, I'm not doing that, boss, especially in Arizona.
• 57:03
  SPEAKER_04: And we've got signs everywhere that say, Don't merge here, merge at the merge point.
• 57:06
  SPEAKER_04: Don't merge here, merge at the merge point.
• 57:07
  SPEAKER_04: Don't merge.
• 57:08
  SPEAKER_04: So I'm just doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
• 57:10
  SPEAKER_04: You can do whatever you want.
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_04: If you're gonna want to block the lane, I'm just gonna go around you.
• 57:14
  SPEAKER_04: It doesn't matter.
• 57:14
  SPEAKER_04: Like people in the comment section are like, I'll burn my life down.
• 57:17
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, I don't know that that's something to be proud of.
• 57:19
  SPEAKER_04: Get a copy of the goddamn book.
• 57:21
  SPEAKER_04: And I do like in the in the comments, I put in there, let me send you a copy of the book.
• 57:24
  SPEAKER_04: Let me send you a copy of the book, copy of the book on me.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_04: It's working.
• 57:27
  SPEAKER_05: You should probably just sell the just sell the first chapter.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_04: Look, I'll send you the first chapter.
• 57:31
  SPEAKER_04: Like again, I come down to this place of if it's about the$10 to for Audible, send me a fucking DM and I will send you the goddamn book.
• 57:39
  SPEAKER_04: This is not for me, this is about like we are this is going to be something that if we could just like globally do a reset.
• 57:45
  SPEAKER_04: I know that that's crazy for me to even think is possible.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_05: I told her the other day, just just do the first chapter.
• 57:51
  SPEAKER_05: She's like, Oh, I can't.
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, no.
• 57:53
  SPEAKER_05: And you know, T news is on.
• 57:55
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, turn that off, turn the music on, and put the first chapter, just the first chapter.
• 57:59
  SPEAKER_04: People, people aren't at a place where they want to do the work to even get any better, which is weird to me.
• 58:03
  SPEAKER_04: But you know, I wanted to end on one thing.
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_04: So when you were talking about in your hands, right?
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_04: And it's one or the other, and it's like, do I want to do this or do I want to do that?
• 58:11
  SPEAKER_04: When you realize that that's what it comes down to.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_04: So if you find yourself being a person that makes excuses a lot, right, which is a dangerous place to be, not for anybody else, but for you, like stop making excuses for you.
• 58:21
  SPEAKER_04: But when you realize, do I want to be this or do I want this, right?
• 58:25
  SPEAKER_04: So I in the book I use the example of the water pick and the dentist saying, if you don't start doing this, you're gonna have adult whatever, whatever horrible fucking word he said.
• 58:33
  SPEAKER_04: And I'm like, I don't want that.
• 58:35
  SPEAKER_04: So at night when I don't want to do it, I'm like, do I want two extra minutes of of sleep or of in my bed, or do I want, you know, adult gingivitis or whatever the fuck?
• 58:43
  SPEAKER_04: And it's like that's an easy thing.
• 58:44
  SPEAKER_04: I don't go, oh, I'm tired.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_04: I'm just I just get out of fucking bed and do it.
• 58:47
  SPEAKER_04: It's like I only get one of these two things.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_05: And then when you when you get out of bed and do it, it feels amazing.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_05: Or you can play with your kids or do this, or yell at this or do this.
• 59:05
  SPEAKER_05: Like when you make the right choice, yeah.
• 59:07
  SPEAKER_05: Again, it's snowballs, it's making those right choices, and the good choices just keep easier, they get easier and easier and easier.
• 59:13
  SPEAKER_05: Like, I got 30 minutes.
• 59:14
  SPEAKER_05: I can go to the gym.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_05: All right, you know what?
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_05: Let's go to the gym for 30 minutes.
• 59:16
  SPEAKER_05: Well it's 30 minutes, you went to the gym.
• 59:18
  SPEAKER_04: Isn't that great?
• 59:18
  SPEAKER_04: And you honor your word.
• 59:20
  SPEAKER_05: That happened that day, and the dude's like, Oh, I haven't seen you in a couple days.
• 59:23
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, Well, I'm here now, that's all that matters, right?
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_05: He's like, Yep, yeah, like I was showed up for 30 minutes.
• 59:27
  SPEAKER_04: That's it.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_04: It's it's it's amazing when you prioritize yourself and and getting to the place where you're good.
• 59:33
  SPEAKER_04: Will you um so for anyone that's in the Phoenix area?
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_04: I want to end on this.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, Damien has built for Cameron and I probably three or four amazing fucking pools, right?
• 59:43
  SPEAKER_05: Like the spa is the one that I like.
• 59:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, Damien, Damien is is uh nothing shy of amazing when it comes to this.
• 59:51
  SPEAKER_04: So if you will you please tell people how to connect with you, and I'll also you know put your stuff in the show notes so that they can reach out.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_04: But if anybody in the valley uh is looking for for pool anything, Damien's the guy.
• 1:00:01
  SPEAKER_04: So please tell us how to get in touch with you.
• 1:00:02
  SPEAKER_05: Divinepools that dot com.
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_05: Uh the phone number is 480 74747856.
• 1:00:10
  SPEAKER_05: And the Instagram is Divine Pools.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_05: I'm I don't really, I'm not that specky stuff like that.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_05: So um yeah, just reach out with the phone number or the email.
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_05: Um love to get to know, you know, what we can do for you guys for sure.
• 1:00:22
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely, absolutely.
• 1:00:24
  SPEAKER_04: So um that's our time.
• 1:00:25
  SPEAKER_04: That's our time for today, but I would just I really appreciate you coming being willing to share.
• 1:00:29
  SPEAKER_05: I appreciate getting invited.
• 1:00:31
  SPEAKER_05: This was uh nervous in the nervous getting up to here, but this is amazing.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_05: It's just like we said, having coffee here.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, we're just having we're just having coffee chat.
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_05: Exactly, exactly what it was.
• 1:00:39
  SPEAKER_05: So I I can't wait to do it again.
• 1:00:41
  SPEAKER_04: Awesome.
• 1:00:41
  SPEAKER_04: I appreciate you.
• 1:00:42
  SPEAKER_04: So all right, well, that's a wrap.
• 1:00:44
  SPEAKER_04: If uh something today, uh excuse me, if something from today's conversation hit home, challenged your perspective, or handed you a cheat code you didn't know you needed, we'd love to hear about it.
• 1:00:52
  SPEAKER_04: Send us a DM or email us at ladies at Let's Get Naked Podcast.com.
• 1:00:56
  SPEAKER_04: And if you believe these conversations matter, help us get them into more ears.
• 1:00:59
  SPEAKER_04: Follow, share, rate, review, send an episode to someone you care about.
• 1:01:03
  SPEAKER_04: Until next time, stay curious, keep growing, and don't waste your potential.
• 1:01:06
  SPEAKER_04: We'll see you on the next one.