Latest / The Driven Athlete / Ep 15: Mastering the Mind: Mental Performance for Athletic Success with Nicole Erickson

Transcript

Ep 15: Mastering the Mind: Mental Performance for Athletic Success with Nicole Erickson · The Driven Athlete

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: If you're a driven, active person who wants to reach and pursue a higher quality life with some ambition, then guess what this podcast is for you.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: This is the driven athlete podcast.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Let's hope y'all it's your man.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: Dr Kyle got a really cool guest here with us today, nicole Erickson.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Thanks for coming in.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Really appreciate the coming in here and sharing some more about your background and how you help people.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Mental performance coach.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Right, yeah, tell us more about, about what you do.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: Okay, where you're at.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'm currently in South Florida, right near you, and I am a mental performance coach.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: So really easy summary of what I like to how I like to say what I do is I help athletes build confidence, build composure and control focus.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Okay, so I provide them with tools that they could use on and off the field.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Court course, whatever it is right.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Um to help them perform better and to enjoy the sport more that.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: No, totally.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: I mean in my humble opinion, with my own little like athletic endeavors in the past.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Looking back and reflecting, I'm like you know, the confidence component, the composure.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: I think that is the number one thing.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: That, like separates, I mean really great performances consistently over many, many Games and seasons, compared because everyone's really athletic and has great talent, like the separating factor of a D1 sports athlete, like talent, wise and athleticism, it's really not much different.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah especially and like when they're pro everybody's super athletic.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: One is yes, then why is it that some athletes just perform under better players?
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I'm like you know, it's the mental component.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: It's the mental component I'm sure you would agree with that.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: Of course I'm like yes, yes, yeah.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: So I I mean, if you really, if you look at the greats right, I always say, like the, what separates the greats from the goods?
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: The greats are able to Recognize.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: When they're distracted or what you know, composers loss like Jokovic comes to mind they're able to recognize it and quickly and then quickly get out of it, and they know how to do that for themselves in a productive way what strategies to Refocus yeah, because everyone's different, everybody's different, or at least like release that emotion or and whatever is going on for them, that's stopping them from executing the way that they want to be executing.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, totally again able to recognize it very quickly and able to get out of it quickly because they know what to do.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so I don't know, yeah so you building you help athletes build confidence.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, maintain their composure in the most of their thing.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: You said focus control, focus, control.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so like be able to control your focus, stay on task, and that makes sense.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: What you said like the first step, I guess, would be recognizing I'm like.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: I'm not in it right now, like I need to.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: I acknowledge this is a fact.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: Yes understood.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, next I don't get back.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: Exactly, exactly that makes total sense.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: I noticed him when you're distracted, I mean when you mentioned tennis, like Jokovic, it's such a Mental game like a focus game.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the mental fatigue.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, golf I would put in the same category.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah right.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: I mean I'm an amateur golfer if I break 90.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: It's a great day.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: I'm not leaving frustrated.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah so like I don't have a ton of experience and competing in that, but the times that I do play, I'm like I like lose my foot, I like lose the mental focus and the mental endurance.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah would you agree that, besides tennis, what?
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Or golf, what other sports you say come to mind in that same category?
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna be honest with you, like all sports all of them.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: I mean every sport's different, right.
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: But I think With the mental side there are like the mental endurance, the mental strength.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: All of them have some sort of like fatiguing.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: It fatigues you in some sort of way, right.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: Even though basketball super fast, it's not like you're playing a match for three and a half hours like tennis.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: You know You're out there for two and you're running up and down the court, so there's not much time, not as much time to like dwell on a point, or there's still some sort of fatigue there, right.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: And so I think, again, it just depends on the sport and the athlete and their needs and what what that looks like for For them.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, let's backtrack real quick.
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, tell us first when you went to school, because you play college basketball, right.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: So I didn't, but I'll tell you my story.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: Okay, yeah.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I it's you know getting into this profession.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: That was one of my worries, because everyone you know that you meet.
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: I assumed they want you to play.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: They would want you to play in college, right, it's like.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like your what's the word I'm looking for?
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Credibility.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Yes, credibility, if you were, you know, at that level.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: But what I've come to find when I tell my story, they kind of realize they're like, oh okay, so when I was in high school, well, I fell in love with basketball like eighth grade, that was it.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: That was life, like this is what I'm gonna do.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna go to college, I'm gonna play professionally and that's that's it.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, very determined, committed, was training outside of my practice, with my team, was doing everything I could to learn the game so that I could achieve my goals.
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: And really what stopped me Was the mental side.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: Why I lacked confidence was the mental side, and during that time I didn't really Recognize that because, again, no one really talked about the mental side and it's like you don't talk about it, right, that was kind of the thing.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: And I didn't know who was gonna show up game day.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: I didn't.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: I didn't know if I was gonna play for myself or against myself, and what I mean by that for me was I'm someone that's super hard on myself and so I was very fearful of making mistakes.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: So my I was distracted by that and, on top of that, if I made a mistake, I'd be dwelling on it for like the next five plays and that's now.
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: My focus is split and I can't Completely execute right to my fullest potential.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: So I struggled with that.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: I was also a very emotional athlete and I didn't know how to manage those.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: So I just try to shove it away, push it away, and I always like to use the example.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: Like if you think of a ball in a pool, you try to shove it down under the pool.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: Eventually your arms are gonna get tired and it explodes out from the surface.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was kind of like my emotions, thank you.
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: It's like my emotions, so I usually would get pulled from the game and like have to calm down before I got to go back in, and so that really stopped me.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: So that's why I like confidence because I didn't.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: I didn't know how to manage the mental side, I didn't have any tools to help me.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then I I also tore two ACLs in high school.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: Which was that's that's tough.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: It was very it makes a challenge.
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: Yes, so one was going into my sophomore year, second was going into my senior year and that, the senior year one, was probably the most devastating because my world really, I mean it came crashing down.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: I didn't, I had only ever saw myself and my future and my success and my identity, my worth and basketball.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: I never really thought that's what I was good at.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: That was me, you know.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: And so when the second ACL Came around, it was like, oh man, now what you know?
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: Like what do I do?
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know who I am at this point.
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: Exactly and luckily I had gone through the first one and kind of, you know, got that experience of like Recovery and being away from the sport.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: But still, it was now is my future that I had been planning since I was in the eighth grade, right?
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, I had to make a really tough decision of either trying to still play right two ACLs later, torn ACLs later, or Do I, you know, go to college and figure out what's next?
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: We're due to college I went to Florida State.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Florida State is seven goals.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: Yes, go nose, go nose.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: How do you feel about them not getting into the fuck?
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: I want to talk about it.
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: Why would you bring them up?
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: About it a lot of upset people.
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that was, that's it was a tough one.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: It was a tough one.
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: We'll leave it at that.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm gonna be watching any of the ball games.
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: We'll just boycotting?
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're done.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, um but that's really, that's really interesting.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: So, um, I I mean I've always reflected back in this again.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: I'm like there's a small window of, of an opportunity for kids To play organized sports and to showcase themselves and have an opportunity for a completely different trajectory in your life.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: That opens up way more doors and opportunities.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: If sports weren't a cat a part of them, right, and then add, like the identity component on top of that it makes it totally makes sense like and people still still some of my patients, my friend, me included.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah still still tell stories like oh man, memory high school.
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: This one day and this one, play the glory day.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: It's like, you know, that was 20 years ago and that's still like a highlight of our life.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: You know what, man?
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: It's just impactful.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah so anyway, I'm like man is a small window of opportunity and we can't eliminate injuries.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: Of course, right, we can help improve the lower the risk of injury, of course educate, and we'd also can't eliminate Emotional distractions and stuff.
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: What we can help, maybe set the stage for things to be better.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: And but and as much as we can right and that's where the mental health component comes in a mental performance, and I totally agree that.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's interesting, you say like Don't talk about the mental health component.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: I Would like to think that the culture seems to be shifting Now, that maybe the past five to ten years, which is great in my opinion, versus like, oh like, are you weak, all right, are you emotionally?
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Are you just?
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: You know, you're not only weak, soft, you soft.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah just pull together.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, get over it oh man.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: That is and same.
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: I apply with everything in life.
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: Relationships like your own, everybody has their own stuff going on.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah and then sports, of course, but I'm like man like.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: I love hearing and feeling myself that the culture seem to be shifting.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, therapy, like for sure.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: It's like good.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah right, like we want things to be good, but it's so.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: You've noticed that yourself too.
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, definitely, I think.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: You know, I think it usually within sport, starts at the professional level and the more more athletes at the professional level are talking about it, more Professional teams are hiring some sort of and we're gonna, I know we're gonna touch on, you know, the difference between Counseling and mental performance coaching, which I'm very excited to talk about.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: But you know, teams have Hired Psychologists to be the team psychologist and now at the college level they're actually crew like building out athletic departments For just mental, the mental side, and that includes, like they're hiring licensed counselors and they're also hiring mental performance coaches.
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: So, like I like to think of the mental performance coaching side more as it's gonna be almost like an athletic trainer that's on the field, meeting with teams and they they're assigned a couple teams and that's what.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: That's what they do, right?
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: They're working with the athletes and then, if they need extra help, they're going to that athletic center where the counselors are For the more mental health concerns that they're having or challenges that they're facing like what.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: So I mean it could be a lot of different stuff, but with therapy, like with therapy, it's more.
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: You know, generalized anxiety, depression, eating disorders, I Mean some athletes experience suicidal thoughts.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: I think that's another one where people it's Scary to hear that, but the more that we are able to talk about it, people go seek help.
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's that's what stops that.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah right because you're more willing and open to share the thoughts that you're having.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: So it's more preventative which is huge.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like the right setting with the right person.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, man it's like now let's, let's open this dive in.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, and so that's the like from you know, all across the board.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: That's really what, what you're looking at when going to therapist or counselor.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: So for you then, the mental performance coach side on the field, on the court.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah at the game, like an athletic trainer would be, and then Helping to instill the confidence composure, the, the emotional management on field.
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah like between timeouts exactly, exactly between timeouts, like if you're coming off the bench before a game, even in practice.
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: You know, sometimes we struggle in practice with where we're at, mood wise, bringing stuff from school or, you know, relationships, whatever.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: How do we, how do we acknowledge that that's there, how we're feeling and just going to practice and still get the most out Of practice for that day and enjoy ourselves?
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: You know, I feel like a lot of times we start sports because it's fun, we're good at it and it's.
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: It's like a safety outlet.
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: You know it's a place where we go there and everything else just goes away.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like sounds yeah, and so how can we continue to have that from the thing that we love?
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: a positive experience versus like yes, chronically stressful, exactly makes that, makes makes total sense.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I wish I had you and I was playing sports.
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: I Got into this exactly, Exactly so I would imagine them like if you're working with teams and stuff and athletes Everybody has their own thing and their own like Ways to cope with some stuff and management and refocusing strategies.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, how do you keep up with that with each individual?
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: Person.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: That's a good question.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Um well, like Cindy comes off the sideline, hate, yeah, let's go through this self-affirmation I get, or like whatever you would do and like oh, john comes back.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Well, you have something different.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: Let's go through your thing.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: So I think that's a really good question.
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: With the field that we're we're in and the training that we do going through school, there's a lot of it's a lot of what we teach.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: I teach my athletes about being present and when you really pay attention in a conversation and really listen, and it's a lot easier to remember that's all things about.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: You know what people say and who they are and what's working for them.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: Mind you, we do.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: I mean, all practitioners take notes, right, we take notes after the fact as well, review those notes.
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: So I mean, if you're working with a team, part of your job is, hey, you got to know what Cindy and what John wants, right?
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: So it's like I don't know why I always use those names.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I don't have ever known him.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: When I sent him it works.
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: No, it's all good.
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, so it's your job to remember that and know that.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: So I think, just with the ability of sitting in and having conversations with individuals and remembering back because of how present you are in a conversation and, top of you know, reviewing those notes prior to games and sessions, is super helpful.
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes total sense.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: I found out myself too a little bit.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: Looking back, I mean, like I remember this person, this person and their specific personal stuff they would talk about.
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: Like how do I remember that?
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: I know Like well awesome.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: I'm like I try hard.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: And I'm like mentally absorbing and trying hard in the moment and it just sticks a lot better, which makes total sense.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's also interesting too, like on the other end, when I'm talking to other people and outside of work and stuff like that, I can tell people aren't listening.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: And it's one of my pet peeves.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: I feel like.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's tough.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Like you're not listening.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not, I might have been.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: You're not fully with me here, yeah.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: You're so stopped.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: And I've done that.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: I've stopped mid-sentence.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: And then it's anything.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: I'm like you didn't even notice.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: That hurts.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Okay, now I know where I'm at.
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: I know where we're at.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: But anyway, I digress.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: So you were mentioning like okay, so let's talk about the different, the different clinician types.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Mental performance coach, licensed medical or licensed mental health counselor.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then your third one, psychiatry, against psychologists, yeah yeah, psychology, yeah yeah, and so like with the psychiatry and the clinical clinical mental health counselor or therapist, really, just the difference from my understanding is just being able to prescribe different meds.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: They still help different capacities as far as like sitting down and talking and, you know, having approach when speaking with with their clients.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: About, like depression, anxiety, stressors in life, maybe coping with previous tumultuous relationships and okay.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, any of that, yeah, so whereas for you it's like, hey, you missed that shot and you're emotionally getting out of hand here.
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: It goes to refocus with these strategies and get back in the game in five seconds.
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, exactly, it was way different.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: Way different, way different.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: But to be fair, like to your point right, there's a lot of relationships within sport, like relationship with your team, whether that be like your team of coaches that you have surrounded right like surrounding you or like a team, like you're on a soccer team, right, where you have all these different players, positions, your coach, you know all the coaches, and so you have those relationships as well that I talk about with athletes.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: But it's just, it's all pertains to sport, right?
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: So yeah, that's cool.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: I love that stuff With what are some of the strategies then?
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: Like what, what things usually work a lot?
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, with athletes.
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: I'm going to give you a more broad version of what what I teach, um, because a lot of my skills that I go over they overlap quite a bit.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: Uh, and my, my approach is is quite different.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: I would say it's more up and coming, more, more, uh, mental performance coaches are leaning toward this approach, but it's really acknowledging and accepting your internal experiences.
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: Uh, and then from there, with that acknowledgement and acceptance of making peace with whatever's going on and just knowing that it's there and that's just going to be there and it's just going to go away.
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: When it goes away, um, knowing that it's there and you could still be the person that you want to be, you can still execute, you can still behave in an alignment with what truly matters to you, Uh, and so it's a lot of self-awareness.
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: That's that acknowledgement.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: The acceptance piece is probably one of the hardest things to tackle because we're so uh for so many years, probably since we were young, I mean, for everybody we're taught like no, you can't, you can't feel this way, whether it's unintentionally or intentionally right, like unintentionally, we'd be like oh, you're sad, let's go get cupcakes, let's go get ice cream, let's go shopping, let's go outside.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: Throw the ball.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: We're thinking of.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: I've heard a lot maybe not necessarily personally, but like rhetoric of kids and stuff like that, Like it's okay, Don't be sad.
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, exactly.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: We've heard, anyway, we've I mean our own like amateur versions of, because we're, you know, we have two kids my me, my wife.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: Um she, we've found a lot of cool things and strategies and stuff.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: So, anyway, we find ourselves trying to validate that acknowledgement.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: Acceptance validated the emotion first, Is that correct?
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: Correct.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: We'll be like it's okay to be sad yeah.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: Tell me why you know, or more I know.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: I've tried to, we've tried to do that with our kids, so it's the same thing you're saying with your athletes.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: So validate what you're feeling.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's okay to get your peace Pissed off right now.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: It makes sense, like a lot of the time it makes anyone else would be pissed in that situation.
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah Right.
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: Like duh, yeah, be pissed.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: But just because you're pissed and your emotions are setting up, like your brain setting off all this stuff, you know, hormones and adrenaline, all this and you're feeling all this stuff in your body and you're getting urges to do certain things because of that emotion.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: That's what you don't have to do, those things you don't.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: There's a choice and through the skills that I teach, right, you start that like little second.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: It starts out where it's just like it's so fast, like you don't even see a gap of like, acknowledgement, acceptance, and then like, okay, now I have a choice to take action.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: Usually it's just like anger, boom, action.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: So the more that you do the skills, that space becomes bigger and there's more clarity in your brain to be like okay, I could either scream at this person right now or I could just sit and continue to listen and keep a normal tone and just be here.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: So it's a lot of like spreading the gap, opening the length of time between heightened emotion and then the action.
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: It's like heightened emotion.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: It's like I'm aware that I'm pretty upset right now and I want to punch this person in the face.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was kind of it's kind of like my racket, my helmet, yeah.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: I was emotional athlete for sure back in the day, in the glory days.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: In the glory days.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of outbursts.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: I felt better afterwards, but anyway, it's totally makes sense.
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm emotional.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: This is loud.
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: You're allowed to be emotional and I would expect someone to be emotionally upset if they missed this play or something bad happened.
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: Bad call, whatever they disagree with, Understood, Got it.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: I'm validating that I'm emotional right now and then from there it's like I can do this or this what's going to be maybe advantageous for my performance If I throw my racket or if I do my refocus strategy?
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: Is that what you were saying?
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: Exactly?
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: Okay, so then?
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: All right, so we widen the gap, we've acknowledged and validated our emotions, we've lengthened the gap to action and we're choosing to take a path.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: What are those?
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: What, then, then, is a strategy?
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: So that's a good question.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: So this is where, like, uh, values come in.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Hey, what truly matters to you?
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: What do you want to represent as a person?
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: Who do you want to be Right?
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: What, what is that?
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: What is that?
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: And you know, I think we all, we all kind of have an idea, but how often do we actually sit down and really process that and think about it?
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Totally.
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: All right, so that's the direction right there.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: What is that for you?
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: And when we figure out what truly matters to you and who you want to be as a person, those things are really fulfilling when you're living by it, when you're doing things within, within that, and so we really break it down and figure out okay, but what does it look like?
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: Because I think a lot of times we get caught up in the words like, oh, I'm kind and I'm hard working, and that means that I just go, go, go and and I'm nice to everybody.
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: But it's like okay, but what?
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: What does it look like on a day to day?
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: Like if you were to watch a video of a person and say man, they are kind, what are they doing?
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: What are they doing for you to say that?
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: And now then we get to the nitty gritty of like okay, so now, yeah, you want to be more aggressive in a game, you want to box out more, right Box out and rebound more.
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: Okay, what does that like?
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: What does that actually look like?
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: Like you're finding a man, you are turning around and backing them all the way out of the three point line, right, like, just to be exaggerated a little bit too.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Okay, so.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: So now we're getting more specific in the action, and now it's it's more clear as to oh, this is, this is the way I want to go, rather than, like basketball, just standing and looking up at the ball and jumping up for it.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah and be like what they had to get the rebound.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: What the heck.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then you're mad yeah, yeah, for sure.
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, coaches yelling at you and then you're benched.
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: Everything fails.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: Oh, crashes down, Exactly.
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, that makes total sense.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: I mean, I think that's the kind, or like they're a really good rebounder.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, then what exactly makes them a good rebounder for your watch film?
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: Like they're a good rebounder, they're not.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: What's the difference?
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: And then for you can we apply that?
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: Right in the, in the game, in the situation.
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: Is what you're saying.
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: How do we do it more?
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: How do we make that choice to go that route more often when we're angry, when we're sad, when we're annoyed, when we're happy, when we're excited?
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: Because that's the other thing that I feel, like a lot of people, I don't want to say to get wrong, but don't think about enough.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: It's like yeah, the negative emotions, like they're super uncomfortable and they usually right If we act on those negative emotions, we choose to act on those negative emotions.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the negative behavior isn't that great, right, or we don't execute the way that we want to on the flip side in sports, if you're in even something life too like if you're super excited, super confident, super amped up, like how many times have you messed up and been out of control because you're so like amped and fired up, like for some people that happens.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: I happen to me, like if I, if I would get like Whoo, if I was up there and I was like ready to go and super energized, like a lot of times I was out of control, yeah, I wasn't, yeah but I was the worst pregame Shooter basketball shooter.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah cuz it'd be so jacked up and on adrenaline, like do a quick jump shot and the warm-up and it like bricks three feet above the rim.
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like that was not even close.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know my like right now.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: I'm just like there's no leveling off, you know.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: So that makes sense to the only yeah, even with like football, right, cuz like football is a super aggressive.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: You would think like the more adrenaline and aggression would be just a benefit.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah not always the case that I found.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: No, it learns.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: I could lead to personal's.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: You know I could lead a bunch of different like totally yeah, then you know in turn doesn't help the team.
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: No for sure.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: But and looking reflecting back, like the times that I really was playing really well, I was in that state of like, I was relaxed and I wasn't too amped and I was just more fluid.
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: It's like, how do you get there Right, like you're in the zone, right, but that too.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: But I'm like, how can you manufacture that?
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you think about that?
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: How can you?
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: Can you manufacture that?
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: You, should you work on it with athletes?
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: So I'm Mean, you can get as close as you can to it, I think, to your point, like everyone has a different zone.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: So like that point that I made of like, sometimes, the you know Positive emotions of her feeling, those we make mistakes too.
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: For some people, that doesn't.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: They're like, no, that's that's where I thrive, like I stay in control when I'm there.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: So, like everybody's different.
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: So, again, going back to that self-awareness piece of figuring out like where you perform best at, for instance, I had this gymnast, college gymnast, and you know she was, we had been working together for a while and it was her second season and she was on bars and she's like man, you know, like I Always hit my routine and warm up and then, but then when I go to compete I'm not hitting it and I'm like, okay, well, what are you doing?
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: You know what are you doing before you go out to actually execute?
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: I had a lot of teammates like this yeah, and they're like.
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: She's like, well, you know, I take deep breaths, I'm like trying to calm my nerves, I'm like getting really relaxed beforehand.
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: Well then I'm like all right, I know, Jim, because she's told me about the gymnastics warm-ups.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: You only get like so many turns on the bar or so many, like so much time on the bar, and it's super chaotic too because You're you like go, but you're also helping because everyone needs the bars at different, like Sot, like I don't know sizes, and there's mats that they move.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: So it's like crazy.
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: So like in my mind, I'm like wait a minute.
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: Like you're like amped up when you're Warming up, like you're high, and then you go to compete and you're bringing yourself down because it's uncomfortable in that situation Because it's only you out there in front of the judges.
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: I'm like you know what?
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: I want you to just try like practice it first and then go out and compete.
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: I want you to just try to allow yourself to be a little bit amped up, a little nervous when you go out and perform in front of judges, because you are during the warm-up and you're crushing it.
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, goes out, does it.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: Does way better.
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: Does way better interesting right, like it's not wild.
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah but everything.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: Everyone thinks you got to be super calm.
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, now take a breath.
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: What I think.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: Something that really was a pet peeve back and back in the glories for me can just reflect a great.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: It's.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: All I can do is reflect.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, totally when a coach other people that aren't actually in it Mm-hmm, share the advice that works for them.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: I'm like you're just telling me what you would do.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm way different than you, dude you know, like just actually you know what?
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: Just be quiet, Just go away for me.
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I hear you I so sharing advice?
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: That's like no, what you need to do is this.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: I'm like okay, whoa, whoa, you have no idea and you're just telling me what you would want right, or what would help them, right.
• 29:43
  Speaker 2: And they're, yeah, and they're just trying to help, but at the same time it's like but that doesn't make sense in my head, yeah totally.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: We're not.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: We aren't the same.
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's, that's a tough part, but I think it just aligns with what what we've been talking about as far as, like, everybody's different.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: So you, really, that's a cool part about my job a meeting with individual athletes it's like, okay, let's figure out what does work for you.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, let's talk about you, figure this out.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: I even is hearing that.
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I would imagine.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: Do you work with a lot of like youth athletes?
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yep between the ages of like what like like high school to college.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: So, like 14 to like 22, 23, yeah so I would imagine, looking back Realistic situations, they have probably a lot of opinions coming at them from all angles mom, dad coach, other coach, assistant coach and their friends social media social, social media.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: Great point how do they?
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: look when they're doing it.
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: Friends and then themselves in the mirror.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah so what Advice do you give those kids that get all these opinions from all these different angles that obviously are misfiring and don't click?
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: I think it's working through them.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: You know, I think what I did, just what I said, it's like all these people just want to help.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: They're just trying to help you right, like, and that's part of so, like overarching, my whole approach is like flexibility and just like compassion for like everything which sounds like kind of.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Like yeah, yeah, passion for everybody.
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: But it actually it's helpful because it's like, well, you know, like they are just trying to help, like it can get annoying at times, but you know they just want to help me.
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, really it is, but they're just trying to help and it's recognizing, like, helping them to figure out, hey, who, who it, who are the people that like it makes, like you trust, and are those that backing?
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah you know that, really understand you, and at the same time, still being kind and like being able to learn how to funnel out, like what does make sense for you and what doesn't, so like someone you might be having you never know.
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: Like you might be having a great conversation.
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: They're giving you your, their opinion and like it's all like no, no, no, and then they just say one thing that clicks and it's like, oh yeah, gonna grab that, everything else just gonna.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: Thanks, you know, that's great.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah so I guess, okay, summarizing that first step would be Okay, I'm getting a lot of opinions.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: They are yes, I'm annoyed.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: That's validate this.
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: Anybody would be annoyed, actually, in a situation getting conflicting opinions that I don't like and I don't even want right now.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm annoyed, got it Understood.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: Next step they're trying to help.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: That makes sense.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, because they love me, they want me to be good.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: Okay, that makes me feel better, but I am annoyed still.
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: Okay, understood, now this decision made, I can have a choice.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: Right, they did say eight things that I didn't agree with, but they said two things that I did like.
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna take those two things exactly this person said seven things I didn't like and one I did.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna take that one Mm-hmm and then move on exactly.
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: Okay, cool, and they just trying to help me.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: I am annoyed, that's cool, but they're trying to help me.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I took these three things.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, got it.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Now I can move on.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: Yep, and I had this one person.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: I really like that.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: They're my guy, my girl, my guy yeah then I'm gonna lean into them, probably more exactly.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Okay, I wish I would have known that when I was Middle school, high school, in college for sure.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: You too, me too.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: One thing I was thinking about you were bringing up Under pressure right like it's chaotic.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah perform well, mm-hmm.
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: And then also like what I'm trying to calm down, if I'm overly positively amped and I perform less.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: I've been diving a little bit into Stoicism recently the past couple months.
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: We're really like resonates with me like this makes total sense.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah and one thing I remember hearing was like I'm under provocation, right when you're provoked, right.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: How can you manage that?
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah your emotional management, even though you're provoked or isn't, like if I'm provoked and like I can't handle anything, I can't hear anything.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: Okay, then we got a Manages some emotional control a little bit right, do you guys?
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Do you dive in with stoicism and much with your so many athletes?
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: I've read about it and then is that a similar message of like when you're provoked yeah, yeah it all, exactly it all, it all overlaps.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: It really does.
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: But I think, yeah, it just goes back to what I was saying, really, for me, as far as managing those emotions, like Understanding that they're temporary, they're gonna go away and you could still, you know, no matter what urges and feelings that you're getting from it, because emotions and thoughts are, I, I say it's, they're just information that your brain's trying to give you.
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: Your brain has a job it's to protect you.
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: That's, that's what it's done for hundreds of thousands of years.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: That's why we're all here today.
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right, like that's why we're here, because our brain is really, really good at protecting us.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but back in the day it was protecting us from, like to survive, right, death Now.
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: Well, now we're thriving.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: I mean, you know we're thriving, like our threat, rather than getting eaten by a bear, is making a three-putt.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: You know, or concern of what the social media opinions are gonna be.
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's another threat, Right, like letting others down or what the social impact will be.
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: But social impact goes back hundreds of thousands of years ago.
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: If you weren't part of your group, you're more likely to die.
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because you didn't have that protection.
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: It was smarter to be in a group.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: Makes total sense.
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: Right, so it's like duh.
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: So the same like heightened life or death type of situation is subconsciously brought to light.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: Even though it's just like maybe like somebody's rejecting your social media post or like what's this gonna look like this fail video of that I missed a shot, but still correlating it to like I'm gonna die.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah seriously, because the bear is gonna attack me.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: That part of your brain, yeah, it's activated and boom, like that's what it's supposed to do.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: So that's part of this whole, like acceptance and making peace with like our brain's doing its job.
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: It's like that overly helpful friend where you're just like, okay, that's enough, you know, but it's there and it's providing you information.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: That overly helpful friend.
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: You're in a good I know your heart's well intended.
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: Yes, right, right.
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: That's enough.
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no more no more.
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, so they, yeah, that's what our mind does, and so it's really just like knowing that and it's like, oh, okay, like my brain works Thanks for this information, brain and like getting my body ready for whatever I need to do to protect myself.
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: But you know, I think I'm gonna do this instead, like you could do that.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: You're in the driver's seat, your emotions and thoughts, they're not.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: They're not in the driver's seat.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: They don't have to be.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: Makes total sense.
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we give too much to our thoughts and our emotions, too much.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: One thing I heard with that too, that this has been like a recent epiphany for me of the same message of like it's just like thoughts come and go all the time.
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: All the time.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: And just because you have a thought, it doesn't identify you as a person, no Cause you're in this, like if I'm like thinking a thought, that's like okay, that's not a great thought, and like I can't believe I would think that what am I?
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: I'm terrible.
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: It's like, well, I'm not acting on it.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: No, it's not me, it's just a thought, it's just a thought.
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: And it's just, I can make a go away Like it happened, I'm not gonna act on it.
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: No, so when we are what we repeatedly do and if we're repeatedly not acting on it, then that means that we're not that person.
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: Okay, cool, exactly, we're just an accomplished Boom, and I was like wow, that makes total sense.
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: Yes, you like to get mad at myself and be like wow, would somebody think like that or think have these thoughts?
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: what I mean.
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like what's just a thought and then I don't have to act on it.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: Yes, mind bomb.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: Bomb.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: Yes, and that's the cool part about that we are not our thoughts.
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: We are not our thoughts, we are what we do.
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and like usually, like when we judge ourselves for what we're thinking or feeling, well, that just like turns it up.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: It's like adding fuel to the fire.
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: And now we're just like all our energy, effort and focus is going into that, like one thought or that one emotion, and now that's where our energy, effort and focus is.
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: We can't do anything else.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: We're not enjoying the moment, we're not there.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: So, and sacrifice performance.
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, man, that's awesome.
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: I love that stuff.
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: Okay, so then, are you, do you advocate then for your athletes, like self-affirmation talks or like?
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: So we get to that.
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: We get to that.
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: I think there because, again, I like to really build on the acceptance piece first.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: So yours is a process.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: It is, it is and depending on where the athlete's at go.
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: You know, we go there, Because the thing with the self-affirmation stuff is like, if you say this to yourself, you're gonna be happier and more confident and more motivated, and it's gonna be la-dee-da-dee-da and again it's giving that.
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: Like we are what we think, we are, what we tell ourselves, it gives it's like a.
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: It gives that it's more in the same boat of like we don't wanna, we're not our thoughts but, here we are, our thoughts.
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: Exactly so.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: It's not, it doesn't contradicting, right.
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: So once I'm able to get athletes to a point where they're like okay, like you know, I acknowledge that I have thoughts that come in and out.
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: They're temporary, like I can manage them, I know what I'm doing, like it is what it is, like it's there but I'm focusing here, then it's like all right, like do you wanna say some stuff that pumps you up?
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: And like yeah, sure, okay, go ahead, go for it.
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: Like let's do it what works for you?
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: You know, and in the skills that I teach, we are using intentional self-talk, intentional self-purposeful things that we're saying to ourselves to work through the emotion or the thought.
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: Right, so, like you went, like when we were talking earlier, it's like that validation piece, Like you gotta talk to yourself, you gotta be like all right.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: So I'm acknowledging and noticing that I'm feeling this.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: So I'm not the only weird one.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, you have to talk to yes.
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: I know I'm normal.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: I thought so yeah, Finally that validation needed that You're welcome, you're welcome.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's, we do.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: You know, we explore that, but the self affirmation stuff I usually get to like later on, if it even makes sense, Okay, yeah.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: Interesting.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: And age.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: Age kind of depends on it too.
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: Like the maturity level, like the.
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: Like developmental, like where they are developmentally, so like I work with some really young athletes, so like eight, nine, 10.
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: So then it's like, you know, I'll do some affirmation work with them, just to cause they're so young.
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like what you're talking about.
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: You know, it's hard for them to understand that what we're feeling and thinking that the actions don't go to, doesn't go with it.
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: Right Cause they think that, Cause usually they're disciplined when they feel angry and they, you know, hit their sister or whatever, you know, pinch you know somebody or throw their food on the ground.
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: Right Cause they're mad, they don't know how to, they don't know how to verbalize it.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: So that's what they do, yeah.
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: Right, they don't have to manage it at all.
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: Exactly, and so they associate.
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: I can pretend.
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, all the time.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so they associate them being mad as bad.
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: But it's really the action that we're disciplining, right, not that they're mad or sad, right.
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: And so that's that's where it gets a little tough with that younger age group of like hey, you know it's, it's a little bit more of a challenge, but you just got to be whoops, you just got to be like work with it and where I'll bring in affirmations a little bit more.
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so intentional self-talk, mm-hmm, things like I'm cause I was a bit.
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: I'm looking back again, like I would be like, oh, you're such a baby right, like you're so soft or you suck, you know what I mean.
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: I would imagine that's very common.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: To athletes you work with still, yeah.
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: So, then what would be?
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: Do you still have like a validation moment and then like, well, let's reverse this and have a different self-talk?
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: No, okay, what do you do?
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: Refocus, just refocus.
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the thought's gonna, we can't so like, if we could control completely, if we can completely control our thoughts and emotions, all of us would be very happy.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: People saying very nice things to ourselves all the time yeah Right, but we don't Like.
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: That's just what it is.
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: Again, it's our brain and that's what I tell my athletes, and so it's not about like cause.
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: Then it's this like chess match in your head or like the screaming family at the dinner table where it's like I'm right, I'm right, I'm right, I'm right.
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: Like what do you know?
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: Or I'm gonna move my pawn.
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: Now that move, you know.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: It's like negative, positive, negative.
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: Again, all the effort and energy is going into.
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: Well, when can I make myself believe?
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: and stop having these negative thoughts, it's like all right.
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: So what I teach is, hey, again, let's acknowledge a thought.
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: Sometimes, like the fun, like fun thing to do is like name your thoughts or give it like name your story.
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: So like, like me, I have like my worried, my worried thoughts or my worry story, you know, cause that's I'm still hard on myself and I still like fear the future.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: You know, like that's it's scary out there, so that when those thoughts come in and I recognize them and say, oh, here's my worried story again here we go, like that, that moment it takes it away from again me not being the story, like I'm not that it's separating me from it and it's like all right, like cool, like thanks, brain, but no thanks.
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: Like I'm choosing to shift focus.
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: Now it's still there, it's still in the back of my mind, but I'm not going to put any any, any energy, effort, focus into it, like I've acknowledged it.
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: I'm just gonna let it be and I'm gonna shift focus to like what I'm doing right now and I'm just be in this moment, enjoy my family, cook this awesome meal, like paint, whatever.
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: It is that I'm doing in that moment, that I want to just be here and Enjoy this and not be thinking about like what I have to do tomorrow for work.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: Right, is there any strategies?
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: In that moment of like, I'm gonna okay that I'm gonna reshift my focus?
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: I want to be present.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: What helps even further to be present versus, like, I'm gonna be present.
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: Present, like how be present?
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: How do we?
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: How do we be present?
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right.
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: Like focus on details what you're doing.
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: Like what do you recommend and let's buy this a sports right.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: Like yeah, yeah, good, yeah, yeah.
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: So I was.
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: Sports I like to like with being present.
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: Sentences are really awesome.
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: So, like tapping into your senses is like an anchor for being present.
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: So, all right, in this moment, like with golfers, like, hey, what do you?
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's in between, like you just hit a shot, you're walking in your next ball.
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: What do you see around you?
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: What do you see?
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: Like take a moment and look around.
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: What do you see?
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: What do you hear?
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: What do you feel?
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: And feels not just with our hands, like you could feel your feet, sushi on the grass.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, like your hat on your head.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: What's it smell like fresh cut grass.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: Exactly, yeah, yeah.
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: So things like that senses.
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: I usually have them.
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: So we're very focused a lot on outcome, which makes sense because that's what we're taught again like success or failure is the out.
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah sure.
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: So what I try to do is hey, let's create some small goals, like really small specific goals that are really achievable, but if you're constantly doing them, it's gonna build your confidence and build momentum right.
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: You know it's what you want to be doing and focusing on and it's just like one to two things, All right.
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: What focus on?
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: Shift your focus there, like Are you doing them?
• 46:00
  Speaker 2: What do you want to do?
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: you know in that moment, so it's like a specific goal, being like I want to get through my Pre-swing routine, a pre-shot routine, mm-hmm, really hyper focused.
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was the goal.
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: That was the goal and if you did it, boom yeah you know, like I had a surfer that I was working with and she was working on, she needs to use her hands more when she's Do her arms more when she's doing her turns.
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah right, that was her small goal.
• 46:26
  Speaker 2: And getting lower Right she wasn't bending her knees enough, so those were her two small goals.
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: So I don't want you to focus on the successful maneuver.
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah the focus is are you using your arms?
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah yes or no?
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: Yep, you did it, mission accomplished.
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: Yep, and if you didn't complete the turn or you fell, whatever you swung your arms more right, and that was what we were trying to do and that's what you're trying to do, and the more you do that, the more success you will have in the maneuver anyway, because you know the tactics and stuff.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah that's really cool.
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: President, so those are just a couple.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: I mean, breathing is super helpful People, so you know everyone for me, the senses, other people, the breathing it's.
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: It just really depends on the, on the person interesting.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: That's cool.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: I've heard the breathing one a lot.
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: I know, like the Navy seals, I think talk about a lot.
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot of people talk about the reason.
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: What's the thought behind that?
• 47:18
  Speaker 2: Oh, I mean, it's helpful.
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: It is helpful.
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: I think you know the misconception that happens with the breathing is like, oh, like this is meant to calm me down, like I'm getting in a relaxed state.
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, of course you're gonna get in relax state if you're slowing your breathing down.
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but the intention behind it, right?
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: So, like, I'm sure you have many physical therapy exercises that you teach and within those exercises you can Target different Things within that drill, right?
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: So, like, there's different intentions within the drill and one athlete you may use it for this, another athlete you may be using it for this make sense, yeah, so, like with meditation, what?
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: Or breathing, or what is your intention behind it?
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: Is it to work on your focus or is it to calm down?
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: Right, and so I think going into it with that mindset of like, well, I'm using this actually to focus and, in a byproduct, maybe, that my heart rate slows down, my breathing rate gets more controlled.
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: Right like I feel more calm, but my main purpose of it is to work on my focus and be more present.
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's great.
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: That makes that's awesome With confidence right.
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: I I've always thought, like I agree, that the confidence is the differentiating factor.
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: It's the tip of the spear for a good versus great right and consistency over time.
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: And then Building confidence is challenging, can't just be like I am confident now.
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, done.
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: I'm not being nice and do that no and it's not.
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: It's not authentic and it's.
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: It's just fake, right, unfortunately, and we know that subconsciously, but anyway, and like okay, then that's the case, I'm a fraud.
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: So something I was introduced a couple years ago in posture syndrome.
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah something I'd be like I battle that my whole I didn't even know, right, yeah, and I was just like thought I was confident, but it really.
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: I just like I don't really belong here and sooner or later Everyone's gonna find out that I'm actually a fraud, mm-hmm, and I don't belong here.
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah right, okay, imposter syndrome.
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah right, so what are your thoughts on how, like, how can you authentically build confidence?
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: So I think.
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: So competency comes before confidence.
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: Competency so your abilities, your knowledge within the sport.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: That comes through experience, comes through practice.
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: And I think we're like where I got mixed up when I was a young athlete was oh, if I just Practice and dedicate all this time, I'm gonna be more confident.
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: Well, my strengths wasn't like tactical and technical on the court.
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: On the court, where I lacked was my mental side and that's why I lacked Confidence, because I didn't have the tools, I didn't have the knowledge and ability of when I got on the court, to manage what was going on in my head so that I can show my strengths.
• 50:11
  Speaker 2: So some of it's like the emotional control is gonna help with confidence, yeah, and being more present, being able to focus, like that's just adding to your knowledge and abilities.
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: Once you have that, you're unstoppable.
• 50:23
  Speaker 2: Like that's a lot of the parents and athletes that come to me.
• 50:27
  Speaker 2: I want to build confidence, I want to feel more confident, like that's that's a common theme and it's like Okay, we can do that.
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna teach you all the stuff and then you're gonna go into games and matches and you know Whatever the sport is and you will feel more confident because now you have tools to help you.
• 50:45
  Speaker 2: When fear pops up, nerves pop up.
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: You just don't feel like you're in it.
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: Right, it's not.
• 50:51
  Speaker 2: I'm going to say these affirmations daily and you know being confident.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: So, so part of the emotion, I should have said management.
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: The emotional management versus control.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: The emotional management plays a role with being more confident and instilling the confidence.
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: Um, the competency, like the ability to be, like I can do I am good, right, like I.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: I guess I would reflect on like in practice, and all this preparation I've done is evidence that I am good because I've hit 10 free throws in a row, or like I'm able to do this drill a thousand times and nail it.
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: So I can do this.
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: Is that something you recommend to them, Like in the moments or before games and stuff?
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: Like to reflect back on like past, past wins, yeah.
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: So I think it depends on the athlete.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Some athletes would do really well with that, other athletes are like.
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: That makes me more nervous.
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: Interesting, yeah.
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: So what do you say with them?
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: So then we don't have to mean that.
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: So then we're not going to do that.
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: So it's more like okay For them, like again what works for them.
• 51:54
  Speaker 2: Well, it's not thinking about past experiences, it's thinking about, you know, maybe it's visualizing themselves being successful, but it's not about past experiences, about.
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: It's about seeing it themselves, making it themselves in their mind.
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we didn't even talk about that.
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: No, we didn't.
• 52:09
  Speaker 2: That's a whole other yeah.
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: I love a future framing of visualization.
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes.
• 52:14
  Speaker 2: And so so do I, so do I.
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: Or, like you know, maybe it's the meditating, maybe it's the, you know, focusing on those small goals.
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: Everybody's different.
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: So whatever that is to help you get into that place where you're ready to go, yeah, yeah.
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: The visualization, the mental rehearsal.
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: I was exposed to that in grad school with some other stuff and I was like I wonder if we can buy this like sports you know, yeah, yeah, it's a big thing.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: So I was working with this young for anybody.
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: They're not familiar with what we talk.
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: What I think we mean is like all right, you're about to shoot a free throw or make or hit a putt or something like that.
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, You're nervous, you want the outcome to be good, got it yeah, okay.
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: You don't have to close your eyes.
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: But if you want to close your eyes, visualize yourself hitting the shot.
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: What things would you go through in this?
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: You would make this swing happen.
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: You would do this, you would hit the ball, you would shoot the ball, whatever, and you would see the trajectory and you watch it in your brain.
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: Go in Successful when.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Okay, now make it happen.
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: So I was working with a young athlete like doing PT stuff, like physical therapy stuff.
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: Right, we're doing some kind of like a ball drill or like a medicine ball throw or something like that.
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: And they weren't really doing it right and they're missing whatever target.
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: I was like yo hit this spot, Don't break the window, Right.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: I felt like this is making me nervous.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: I was like, all right, I'll pause.
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: I want you to close your eyes and I want you to focus on this drill and I want you to throw the med ball.
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: Don't actually throw the med ball.
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: I want you to throw the med ball with your brain and that you're doing the drill.
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: So I was like close your eyes and do it.
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, did you do it?
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: Yep, okay, let's try it again.
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: Did it failed?
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: And I was like let's do wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: When you mentally rehearsed and visualized yourself, did you visualize yourself failing?
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: And he's like, yeah, and I'm like yeah.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: Wow, yeah, that makes total sense.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: All right, dude.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: Hey, make sense, that's fine.
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: This time I want you to visualize yourself being successful through this little mid-ball throw or whatever drill.
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: And he did it.
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: And then he did it again.
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: He was successful that time.
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but.
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: I was like man.
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: That makes total sense.
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: I was like I didn't even in the moment.
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: I was like you probably visualize yourself failing.
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: I did that.
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: I do that a lot too, uh-huh, you know.
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: So so, two year, going back with the skill, because I want to hit on this for people that are listening.
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: So it's recreating or creating an image in your mind of you playing a sport or executing a skill within sport.
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: Okay, with imagery, it is a skill Like we yes, we do it.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: Like what you're saying, like most athletes have visualized before failing and being successful.
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: They, they do that.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Some athletes cannot do it, like that's just what it is, but they can build it.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: It doesn't mean they can't do it.
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: Right, it's a skill.
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: It's just a skill that builds.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like you know, it's like a swing in golf or baseball, it's like dribbling in basketball.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: You can build it.
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: The thing that's really important with imagery is controllability and vividness.
• 54:59
  Speaker 2: So controllability is how well you can manipulate and control the image that you're envisioning in your mind, right Without your mind, without your mind taking over.
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: So some athletes have low controllability, where they're trying to imagine prior to a match or in like during a match, and the brain takes over and shows them failure.
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: Well then, we got to.
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: We don't want to be doing that.
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: Because we need to build up that control.
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: So when you are doing it you're seeing success Right and you need more reps with imagery to build that control.
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: Vividness how clear you can see the image, the more clearly, the more benefit you're going to get.
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: So high controllability, high vividness, it's just going to make the experience more real and then more of an impact that makes so sense.
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: So, like in the moment, you would be like, oh okay, you have a game winning shot.
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: You've never done this before.
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: I want you to visualize you making a shot.
• 55:56
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: They're like oh gosh, I missed it.
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, I need to bolt my foot and I missed.
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: Now go do that.
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: Wait, it's not the intent.
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: Right, exactly, we've got it so another, I guess another thing, a message I'm hearing is like hey, I want my kid to be more confident and improve their skill, so we're going to book a session.
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: And that's it.
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: No, no, it's like.
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: This is like skill building over many, many episodes and months of like practice and work and working through stuff.
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: So there's no, like it's a process, it's not like a quick one time and you're one session.
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: You're like fixed.
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: And then that's the other misconception about the mental side.
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: It's like, oh, we'll just, we'll get this one like tool, technique and we'll be good to go and I'm going to be fixed.
• 56:39
  Speaker 2: It's like, no, it doesn't work like that.
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: Like I, to this day, I still am hard on myself and it's something that I have to manage and work through on a day to day basis.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: Like that's just that's just what it is.
• 56:51
  Speaker 2: And that's that's what it is for everybody, like if you want to get good at it and you want to manage it and figure it out and be successful in that piece of sport.
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's going to be a process.
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: That makes total sense.
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: I would like a.
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: I would imagine, like you're working through 15 years worth of mental visualizations, perspectives and beliefs that shape your world, You're working through 15 years worth of that for this one time, Like we have.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: I mean, we have a lot of work to do to get through and manage previous tumultuous events and stuff like that.
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean same thing.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: With like, I mean building skill.
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: It's like one.
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: It's something I've heard that I'm like yo.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: This makes total sense too for the people that are successful and whatever they're trying to do, they're okay with sucking at the beginning, the humility of like, and then getting the ego out and be like I'm going to suck at this for a little while, but I know that.
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: Would it be unreasonable to think that if I practice kicking the soccer ball with my left foot, that I would be bad at it?
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: If I did it for a year straight without stopping and practicing, would it be unreasonable to think that I'd be good at it?
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: No, Okay, let's get it Right, but are you okay with sucking for the first six weeks?
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: Right, exactly Looking like a fool, uh-huh.
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: Totally yeah, if I know it.
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: I know this is going to get me better, yep.
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: So, it's okay with sucking for a little while.
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: Um practice.
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: Were you great at kicking the ball to your left foot the first time?
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: You tried, of course not.
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: Were you great at like visualization or emotional management the first time?
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: You probably not.
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: Probably not, but that's okay yeah.
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: And that's expected, right.
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: And if you practice this over many, many months, would you expect yourself to be better?
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: Probably, yeah.
• 58:24
  Speaker 2: I think so yeah, definitely, definitely.
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: That's a good message, yeah, and for me I'm like yeah, it makes total sense.
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I.
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: It's a story because I just think it resonates with so many people when you are able to bring it back to like a professional.
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: Roger Federer.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: Okay, when you think of him as a player, like mentally, what do you think?
• 58:41
  Speaker 2: Do you like tennis?
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, okay, I would think I mean, uh, he manages his emotions pretty well.
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right, like very calm, very calm.
• 58:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, steady Focus.
• 58:51
  Speaker 2: So recently I learned when he first became a pro he was not Like he was all over the place.
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: Even as a youth athlete he was like there's interviews of his parents saying like we would always have to tell them like if he can't figure out his mental side, that's what's going to stop him, and so then there's a video of him doing an interview you know later on and he's he's talking about.
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, when I first became pro, I was a hothead.
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: I couldn't manage my emotions.
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: It took me three years three years to figure out my mental side and feel comfortable and know that I can go into a match and not lose a game mentally.
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: So I mean, think about that Three years Like the goat of tennis, one of the goats right Of tennis, and it took him three years.
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: And that can be daunting to hear because it's like man, but it's like, okay, wait a minute To your point.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: How long have you been playing your sport?
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like how long have you been doing that?
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you're at this point right now and all you think about is, hey, if I keep playing, I'm only going to get better and become the best ever and go college pro.
• 59:58
  Speaker 2: It's like, yeah, guess what?
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 1: Same with the mental side yeah, I'll play that same thought with the mental component.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly no, I didn't make it to the center.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: That's totally true.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: Like I feel like another barrier for myself is reflecting, and I would imagine that the people is like three years.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: Yes, I can't do that.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: Like you're not trying to cram three years today.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I know Like the best way to get there is just taking one step at a time, right?
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: A 10,000 step journey begins with a one step right Exactly.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that ancient Chinese proverb or something.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: I probably messed that up.
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: Sounds good to me.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: That's cool.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 1: Well, that's awesome.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 1: Well, how to get you back to do like a whole mental imagery and type of podcast and perspectives and stuff like that.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 1: Well, thanks for coming in.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you, we'll definitely expand more conversations.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: Tell people where they can find you, how can they can contact you and like where you're located.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so my Instagram is at coachnicholee, period E, and that's my Facebook too.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 2: I'm not really on Facebook, but if you want to go on there, and so more Instagram.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, more, more Instagram, and then my website's, nicole Ericksoncom.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: So, and I see, oh, l E E R I C K S O N so everyone gets that wrong, so they can DM you.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, dm me If you go to my website.
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: My email's on there Just easier, same with my Instagram.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: So if you go there you want to shoot me an email, dm me, I will get back to you.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 2: Cool, yeah, gotcha.
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: Well, thanks for coming in.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: Thank you for having me, yeah.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: And you can always add.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: We're always open to questions, comments, concerns, suggestions for stuff we talk about, and if you have any questions for us with like pain you've been battling, you can always reach out to us on the best email for us as team at athleterccom Go to our website, athleterestorationcompanycom, or Instagram, and we're always love to help people, so don't hesitate to reach out if you need anything and we'll catch you all next time.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: Hey, hold up.
• 1:01:57
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