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How can I protect my mental health? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Protecting your mental health during estrangement is not selfish.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's necessary.
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  SPEAKER_00: As estrangement can feel a bit like grief even when stepping back was the right call, because you're still mourning a relationship that mattered even if it wasn't safe or workable.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's common to feel guilt, relief, sadness, and anger all in the same day, sometimes in the same hour.
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  SPEAKER_00: One of the most protective things you can do is remind yourself that you can't control how a family member behaves, only how you respond to it.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't make the situation hurt any less, but it does mean your energy is better spent on what's actually within your control, like your own boundaries and how you talk to yourself about what's happened.
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  SPEAKER_00: Naming what you feel, even just quietly to yourself, saying something like this hurts more than expected or I feel let down can help stop those emotions building up over time.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: And practical ways you can support yourself with this is that boundaries protect your mental health.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not only about contact, it also covers how much you discuss the situation and with who, especially if the people around you aren't supportive of your decision.
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  SPEAKER_00: Protecting your peace might mean stepping back from certain conversations, family group chats or social media accounts that keep things feeling raw.
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  SPEAKER_00: It also helps to build support outside the family, so whether that's close friends, a support group, or an organization set up specifically for people going through estrangement.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: And new routines can help as well, as marking occasions in a way that suits you now rather than trying to fit them around a family structure that no longer works.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: And if the guilt, sadness, or anger starts to take off daily life, or you find yourself replaying conversations and struggling to switch off from them, that's worth bringing to a professional.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: As counselling isn't only for when things reach a crisis point, but it can help you impact what's happened and build ways of coping well before that.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: If you're also noticing things like persistent low mood, panic or thoughts that frighten you, then reaching out to your GP or mental health professional as well.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: For more on coping with a strange family dynamics, take a look at the app's resources.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: If you're thinking about harming yourself and feeling safe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency number or a crisis helpline.