Latest / High on Life with Melissa Minnich / Veronica Kelly — Safety, Forgiveness & Freedom

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Veronica Kelly — Safety, Forgiveness & Freedom · High on Life with Melissa Minnich

0:03
Speaker 1: What if the success in life you've been chasing was
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never meant to come from outside of you? This is
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High on Life. I'm your host, Melissa Minnick, scientist, consciousness explorer,
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and spiritual alchemist. And this is where we go deeper,
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where science, spirituality, and human potential converge through conversations that
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explore consciousness, energy, and what it actually takes to stop
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chasing and start experiencing your life differently. Get high with
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me in this conversation. Hello and welcome back. Today's conversation
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explores a question that many of us don't realize we're asking.
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Why is change so hard? And even when we desperately
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want it, what if the answer isn't a lack of willpower,
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but a lack of safety? My guest today is Veronica Kelly,
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liberation strategist, transformational teacher, and one of the contributing authors
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in our upcoming book, The Way of the Initiate, Stories
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of Remembering, Awakening, and Becoming the New Human. Through her work,
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Veronica helps People understand that true transformation begins when we
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create enough safety within ourselves to release old stories, embrace self-love,
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practice forgiveness, and ultimately experience freedom. In this conversation, we
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explore liberation, emotional safety, healing, forgiveness, self-love, and why freedom
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isn't something we find, it's something we remember how to embody. Veronica,
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welcome to High on Life. Thank you, Melissa.
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Speaker 2: I am so happy to be here with you and
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all of your amazing listeners and to just help to
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link arms and share our co-vision of creating liberation and
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freedom and life that lights people up. So I'm happy
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to be on this train with you, not just your podcast,
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but in life and on our book.
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Speaker 1: So thanks for having me. Oh, I'm so excited. And
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I'll let everyone know in the audience here today, Sivarana
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is also a dear friend of mine. So it's always
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wonderful when I get to bring somebody onto the podcast
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that walks the walk and talks the talk and has
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become a friend in my life. And so it's just
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an honor to have you here today. And first, I
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always love to start with a little bit of your
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origin story. Like what first led you onto this path?
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Was there a defining experience that completely... changed the direction
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and decided that I was about safety and liberation?
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Speaker 2: Yeah. So it's really interesting because for me, it was
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a huge aha moment. Basically, so listeners may know this,
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they may not know this. From the ages of zero
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to six, our brain is in a theta wave brain state.
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And that is where we're learning our identity, how to
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stay safe in the world, That's when our nervous system
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is forming around what is acceptable treatment for us.
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Speaker 1: How do we get love?
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Speaker 2: And unfortunately for me, that's when most of my trauma was.
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There was a lot of abandonment. There was a lot
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of neglect. There was a lot of instability. My parents
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were young. They tried their best. But ultimately, I ended
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up moving in with my grandparents. And there was a
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lot of abandonment. Now, moving forward from that, my grandparents
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provided a great life for me. My dad did his
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very best. And I thought that I was a very confident,
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evolved woman out there in the world. And so it
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wasn't until I was like 29 years old or so
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and I'd never had a serious boyfriend. I always attracted
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that same guy, unavailable, selfish, addicted, that could love bomb me,
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promise me a bunch of stuff, and then ultimately disappear
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when it got time to commit.
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Speaker 1: And I was almost 30 and I was like, what
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the heck?
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Speaker 2: And because I lived in Los Angeles, Melissa, you know this,
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like I was able to have any ear that could
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listen back me up when I said, oh, guys are
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just selfish here. Everybody has the Peter Pan issue. There's
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no good guys in LA. And I lived in that
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conversation that it was everybody else. Long story short, I
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had a project that I had written and shot and
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starred in.
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Speaker 1: It was awesome. We had our premiere.
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Speaker 2: It was up on a big screen with this giant, awesome,
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like red carpet event. And we put the show together
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as a short film and I watched and it was
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loosely based on my dating life. Hilarious show. It's called
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A-Holes Anonymous. I'm so proud of it. And it was
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loosely my dating life. And I watched for 45 minutes
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straight and saw my failed dating relationship after my failed
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dating relationship, after my failed dating relationship, after my failed
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dating relationship.
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Speaker 1: And I got done and I was horrified.
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Speaker 2: And I had so many people come up to me
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and say, it was brilliant.
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Speaker 1: It was funny.
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Speaker 2: And it was all these things. I should have been
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like on a cloud nine, but I literally was like,
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oh crap.
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Speaker 1: I'm the one consistent person in this story of my
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dating life. It's me.
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Speaker 2: And so it was that shatter. I woke up the
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next day and I was really like shook. And I
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was like, okay, I'm creating this.
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Speaker 1: It's me.
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Speaker 2: And so that was that moment when I was like, no, sir,
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I'm not going to create this any longer.
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Speaker 1: I'm almost 30.
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Speaker 2: I deserve to have a boyfriend, if you will. I
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deserve to have the things I want in life. And
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so that's when I got into therapy. And through therapy,
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they told me that I had abandonment issues and wounds.
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And I sat in that freaking chair with the therapist,
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analyzing what was wrong over and over and over. And
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nothing changed. And then I was in a shame spiral.
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And I couldn't figure it out. And then I found
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emotional freedom technique through a women's leadership course I had taken.
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And within moments of doing EFT on my body, I
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felt a shift. So I pursued that modality of creating safety, love,
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and acceptance in my body, which I'd never done before.
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And within months, I actually saw my 3D world change.
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And so it was that aha moment to take responsibility
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and to get the help. And then when I finally
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did it with love and compassion and self-acceptance, that's actually
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when things changed. And so I pivoted everything and my
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whole entire trajectory of what I was passionate about and
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changed into how I can get these tools into people's
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hands because it changed my entire life in a really
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short amount of time. So that's the cliff notes of
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my origin story for sure. I know it's a lot
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of information in a short amount of time.
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Speaker 1: Oh no, it's perfect. And I really love like, How
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powerful are you as a creator that you created a
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situation where you got to see your life story on
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a screen? Like, boy, if we all had that opportunity,
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we would all figure out our stuff, right? Like if
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I was watching, if I went and watched my life
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on a screen, which Now, you know, and could look back,
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I would then be able to say, oh, this is
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my stuff. These are my patterns. These are the things
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that I've done. Most of us don't get that kind
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of opportunity to actually see it laid right in front
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of us. You know, you can have somebody tell you,
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you're the center of it. You're creating your reality. You're
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the one doing this. And unless you're, unless you really
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start to We have that perception. You're just like, oh, no,
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it's always everyone else.
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Speaker 2: Right.
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Speaker 1: And I love, you know, one of the things when
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I was studying with Jack Canfield years ago is one
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of the first things that I always remembered. And the
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success principles that he said was like 100 percent responsibility.
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Speaker 2: Right.
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Speaker 1: Like 100 percent responsibility for your life. And it sounds great.
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But when you when we are living in a mode where,
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like you said, from our childhood, where we are always
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the victims, we see ourselves in that way. I'm like,
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we were victims. I was a victim. You were a
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victim as children.
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Speaker 2: Right.
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Speaker 1: But then we carry that into our adult life.
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Speaker 2: Right. Yeah. And I love that conversation about 100% responsibility
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because one of the things that has radicalized how I
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review my relationships from my past is the concept of
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radical forgiveness. And the radical forgiveness takes it even further
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into saying that, yes, we did not deserve that as children.
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Speaker 1: Absolutely.
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Speaker 2: Nobody, it wasn't good. It wasn't a good thing that
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happened to us. But taking that responsibility that.
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Speaker 1: Your soul chose.
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Speaker 2: That particular trauma, that particular family structure, this particular lesson
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as your challenge in this go-round on planet Earth. And
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if we can think, all right, I'm actually responsible. I
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created my attachment to this family when I chose to
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be born into this birth family. It allows to disconnect
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even more and be like, okay, Maybe there is a
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part of me and maybe my parents, you know, thank
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you for the horrible experiences that led me down this
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path of trauma and healing and all the things that
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we get to do. So even taking that 100% responsibility
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into your soul's journey helps to radically forgive situations that
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are very hard to wrap your head around.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, I've definitely lived in a lot of radical forgiveness
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and understanding, and I've transformed to the place where I'm
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so grateful for the things that I have experienced. But
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one of the things I don't want to go back
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to when you're talking about your orange and stories, you
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talked about what you found after we all know top-down
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psychology is good for certain things, but it really doesn't
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work with our systems in the way we need to
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heal and release the trauma and things like that. And
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you found emotional freedom technique, EFT. So for those out
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there that maybe have never heard of this technique before
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and want to know more about it, can you share
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a little bit about exactly what that is? Boy, can I.
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Speaker 2: I will shout from the rooftops about EFT. It is
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one of the most profound, instant, Radical ways to rearrange
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your energy field and create massive transformation from the inside out.
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And the cliff notes are, is that we have lines
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of energy in our body, our meridian points, are knotty.
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These are the same lines of energy that they have
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been mapping and studying in traditional Chinese medicine for thousands
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of years. And so if you go into an acupressure session,
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you'll have the acupuncturist put the needle and that will
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open up a line of energy and then they can
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move whatever it is you want to move. With EFT,
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you tap on different parts of your body and you
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access these lines of energy. And as you open up
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your energy field and just say, this sucks, but you're safe.
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I love and accept myself even though I am stuck
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in this place. We start to just create an opening
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in our body that to examine what it is that
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we desire to sit with, what we desire to move,
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what we desire to amend, what we desire to heal.
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And when you create that openness inside of your field,
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your body wants to listen. It wants to be happy.
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It wants to heal. It wants to be loved. It
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wants to do the things that you desire for it
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to do. It just opens up this place where there
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is a dialogue between you and the parts that we
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hide because we get those defense mechanisms we get the shame,
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we get the guilt, we will separate from the situation
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to protect ourselves and shove it away. But if it's
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shoved away, it's still part of your energy field. It's
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still taking up part of your vibrational signature, pushing away
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things or pulling things towards you. And when you can
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reconnect into that wound with love and safety, then you
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as the resourced adult can do the healing and give
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yourself what you need to give yourself in order to
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move it through your body. And so The basics are
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you tap on the meridian points, you accept and you
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love yourself no matter what, and you create safety to
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examine it.
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Speaker 1: That is paramount. That is step number one.
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Speaker 2: And then as you do that, then you just re-invite in,
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I'm a sovereign human. I'm not the child that's stuck
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in this trauma anymore. I'm not the college girl stuck
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in this trauma anymore. I'm not the person who went
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through this horrible divorce anymore. I am sovereign, and I'm
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going to let this go with love and compassion. And
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then after that, sky's the limit.
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Speaker 1: Mm, yummy.
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Speaker 2: One thing I wanted to, real quick, one other thing
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I want to talk about is that it's one of
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the most scientifically studied modalities that's out there and, quote,
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alternative healing. And when you are working with your neurological pathway,
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so if your thought is on a loop or you're
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in PTSD or you're shame spiraling, when you do EFT
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and you break that thought, they have a science that
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proves the protein bond on that neurological thought process in
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your brain breaks. And then now the neurological pathways are
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able to make a new choice, a new opinion, a
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new identity. So that's how it works in the brain
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to rewire your thought processes of who you are and
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what you can achieve, do, and be in the world.
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Speaker 1: And then the other one.
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Speaker 2: I was speaking of is how you get it through
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your physical body and your energetic body.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, beautiful. And EFT, we had Dawson Church on here.
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And so if you guys want to go back to
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that episode also and hear about how they're using EFT
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with the military, over 20,000 veterans. It's better than Prozac.
13:16
It's been amazing. So there's so many different ways to
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understand what you can use with EFT. And what we'll
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do today is wait till the end and we'll have
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Veronica do some EFT with all of us here.
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Speaker 2: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: It's going to be really exciting.
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Speaker 2: Yeah.
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Speaker 1: But let's dive in. So you are in one of
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the contributing authors for our upcoming book, The Way of
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the Initiate. It launches here in September, September 23rd. Yeah,
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September 23rd is our launch date. It's in the middle
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of The Way of the Initiate Summit. If you want
13:48
to get on that wait list now, you can go
13:50
to thewayoftheinitiate.com or thewayoftheinitiate.online. And each of the incredible authors
13:57
is bringing their unique wisdom to this book. So tell
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us a little bit about the initiation story that you're
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sharing and how does that feed into your and change
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your understanding of freedom?
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Speaker 2: Yes.
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Speaker 1: Thank you for asking.
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Speaker 2: I am really, really proud and excited to share this story.
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My chapter is All of Me is Safe. And The
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greatest gift that you can give yourself, in my opinion,
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is knowing that no matter what happens, you're going to
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get through it. You're safe. You've got the skills and
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the tools, and it's not going to break you. And
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through me, part of my defense mechanism with my mom
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not being around when I was little and the abandonment,
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and it devastated me, obviously. And So my mom and
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I are, you know, we have a relationship now and
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I have so much compassion and love for her. And
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I see how hard it must have been on her
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at 18 to have her daughter separated from her. And
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no begrudge, I do not begrudge her at all for this.
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And when we were separated, my heart was shattered into 250,000
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million pieces. I remember crying myself to sleep every single
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night for as long as I could remember. And When
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I was in the therapy chair wondering why I keep
15:22
attracting the same unavailable, addicted, just person who could not
15:27
love me, it was brought to my attention that I
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had a defense mechanism that literally pushed away anybody who
15:36
would and could love me so that if nobody loved me,
15:40
I wouldn't have to go through my heart being shattered again.
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And this was a subconscious, I had no idea, like
15:46
a completely subconscious defense mechanism. that was quite literally running
15:49
the show. And so the first step of moving through
15:53
that was just creating safety. I can be loved and
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be okay. I can, you know, just creating that safety.
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And when I did that, very quickly afterwards, I stepped
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into a five-year relationship with a man who completely changed
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my life. It was the most healthy, loving, when it
16:11
was the four and a half years that it was good,
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it was amazing. And then the last year when it wasn't,
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it wasn't. And when we split, that broke me. And really,
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it's interesting because it very much mirrored. And there's a
16:26
lot more to it in the story. There's really fun
16:28
stories about the Mandela effect and switching timelines and things
16:32
that happened that.
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Speaker 1: Led up to it.
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Speaker 2: But when we did split, it was without warning. And
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I had spoke to him about trying to work on things.
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I brought to his attention stuff I needed to shift
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in order to get married and all of these things,
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but he didn't do the same with me. And he
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was a type of guy that compartmentalizes, wants to be
16:54
the good guy, doesn't want to have to fight, doesn't, well,
16:57
make himself uncomfortable to make other people around him feel good.
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And so long story short, when we did end up splitting,
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there was no, I'm going to work on this.
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Speaker 1: There was no, this is what I need. There was no,
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it was, I'm done. We're over. I'm out.
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Speaker 2: And that was like a very similar thing that happened
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to me that happened with my mom, but obviously in
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a very different way. And then I felt completely blindsided,
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completely abandoned, completely shattered.
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Speaker 1: And through.
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Speaker 2: This process, it was during a pandemic. And so I
17:32
had no church. I had no gym. I had no bars.
17:36
I had no, I couldn't hang out with friends. In LA,
17:38
the lockdown, you couldn't even go outside.
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Speaker 1: Oh, LA was the worst. The worst. At the same time.
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Speaker 2: Yeah. I was in West Hollywood. Like you couldn't go
17:46
to the beaches. They would give you a ticket if
17:48
you just sat on the beach. You couldn't hike. I
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was like me in my apartment and I thought I
17:54
was going to die. Yeah. There's only so many hours
17:57
friends can sit on the phone while you repeat the
17:59
same thing crying.
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Speaker 1: And so....
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Speaker 2: This story of my initiation was through that pain, I
18:06
did have my tools. I did have EFT. I did
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have all the skills and the tools that I help
18:13
people now with. And through that, I was able to
18:17
get through it. And not only did I get through it,
18:21
but I am a better person. I am more confident
18:23
in these tools and these skills. I am in a
18:26
completely different place in my life. I also, looking back,
18:30
I was really abandoning myself to keep this love. There
18:33
was a lot of things I didn't feel comfortable talking about,
18:35
like fun conspiracy theory stuff or questions about the universe
18:40
and magic and all the things I love.
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Speaker 1: It wasn't an open dialogue with him.
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Speaker 2: And there was a lot of ways I was abandoning
18:46
myself to keep love and get love, which I didn't
18:48
really realize at the time. So on the other side
18:51
of this, that initiation that no matter what, I will
18:56
be okay.
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Speaker 1: I will get through it.
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Speaker 2: I have the skills and the tools to do so
19:01
is one of the most empowering things life-changing, inspiring things
19:05
that I can stand tall in and share with other people.
19:09
Because if my ass can do it, anybody can. Yeah.
19:13
So that's a little cliff note about what my journey
19:17
is in the chapter in the book.
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Speaker 1: And when you go read the chapter, you're going to
19:21
dive deeper into, like, there's some really interesting things that
19:25
weave into this, like you were talking about with the
19:27
timeline jumping and the Mandela effect. And so... This story
19:31
is really a beautiful story of an initiation into Veronica's
19:35
next level of her life and the work that she's
19:37
really doing right now. I love it. I want to
19:39
dive deeper into this idea of safety because I don't
19:42
think this is something we talk about enough. I think
19:45
it is so powerful, so important, but most people, when
19:48
they think of safety, they think of like financial security,
19:52
you know, or, you know, you see your kid and
19:57
your parents keep you safe, safe from danger outside or,
20:00
you know, being robbed or, you know, physical safety. But
20:04
this is a completely different type of safety. And you
20:07
even call it the VIP component, of transformation. So when
20:12
you say safety, explain like on a, not just a
20:20
level of like safety, but for someone that's made me saying,
20:23
what does that really actually feel like? Like, how do
20:25
I know that I'm creating safety? And what do you
20:28
mean by that? Yeah, absolutely. Great question. Safety is paramount.
20:33
Speaker 2: It is the very first step I take every one
20:35
of my clients, whether it's in a group coaching, whether
20:37
it's one-on-one coaching, The very first thing that we do
20:41
is work to create safety inside of your body because
20:45
we're only going to be as successful as we feel
20:48
safe being.
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Speaker 1: What does that mean?
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Speaker 2: That means that, as I was speaking about before, when
20:54
we are in those ages of zero to six, we're
20:56
literally learning how to stay safe in our family environment.
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So if you grow up in an environment where there
21:05
is a lot of fighting, you might learn that if
21:09
I stay really quiet and I don't take up a
21:11
lot of space, I am safe from this fighting. And
21:14
then that begins to be a part of how you
21:17
operate in the world. And maybe you want to go
21:20
teach and speak, but you don't feel safe being seen
21:25
and taking up space. It doesn't matter how many classes
21:29
you take to try to be a big speaker. It
21:31
doesn't matter how many times you have to do a
21:33
presentation in front of a room. You're going to fumble
21:36
it up. You're probably going to cause some type of sabotage.
21:39
It's not going to go to how you desire for
21:42
it to go unless you create the safety, I can
21:45
take up space and still be okay.
21:49
Speaker 1: Same with money.
21:50
Speaker 2: If you see your family go through extreme hardship with money,
21:55
then you may create a story in your head that
21:59
if you get a lot of money, a big calamity
22:01
will fall upon you. And then you're afraid to take
22:03
up that much money. You push it away as quick
22:06
as as it comes to you. We have these psychological
22:11
visions of ourself, of how we're supposed to stay safe
22:15
and our nervous system feel safe. And it translates into
22:19
our subconscious way of which we operate in the world.
22:22
And the wild thing is sometimes we don't even realize
22:24
we're doing it. It's just through seeing these repeat patterns
22:28
that are like, why? I'm doing the thing. I'm doing
22:30
the thing. Why do I still have this pattern? It's
22:33
the subconscious belief in your body that if you step
22:36
into that version of yourself, you will not be safe.
22:39
Speaker 1: You will not get loved.
22:40
Speaker 2: You will lose everything. You will fill in the blank.
22:45
And it's tricky because often, Melissa, these are subconscious thoughts
22:49
that we don't even realize and programs that we don't
22:52
even realize we're running. Yeah.
22:55
Speaker 1: Well, what about for people that are like, okay, I've
22:59
been super successful and Right. Like a lot of us.
23:02
So this this highlight podcast is for the higher performers
23:04
are really like we're combining the science and the spirituality
23:07
and this human potential together. But there is this there's
23:10
the whole genre of the world right now that they're
23:13
like they've done all the things they were told to do.
23:15
They did all that. They created massive amounts of wealth
23:17
and success on the outside. But everything else, the disconnection,
23:20
everything else in their lives are falling apart. And so
23:24
they're like, well, I have financial security. But what could
23:28
possibly be going on with me that I still don't
23:30
feel safe in my body? Right.
23:32
Speaker 2: And that is a case-by-case situation. I work with really
23:36
high-level achievers, people who have massive, massive, massive real estate
23:40
portfolios that run giant resorts.
23:42
Speaker 1: I have multiple doctors.
23:44
Speaker 2: I have high-level people in my life that trust me
23:47
to help them move through what's keeping them stuck. And
23:51
I'll tell you, it's different for lots of different people.
23:54
So I'll give you an example. One of my clients,
23:56
he has a huge real estate development with lots of,
23:59
a lot of money on the line from investors. And
24:01
he's come in to create systems and he's has a
24:05
lot of success with us. And that's why he got
24:07
brought onto this project. And he came to me and
24:10
he's like, I am always, I have so much anxiety.
24:13
I think they're going to fire me at any moment.
24:15
I am afraid to speak at the, in the boardrooms. I'm,
24:17
he has all this stuff. And so we dove into
24:20
him and he used to get in trouble so much
24:22
when he was little. His religion, he was raised in
24:25
Catholic church school where the nuns had full reign to
24:31
just beat him with a ruler if he did one
24:33
tiny mistake. He made one mistake with something on a
24:35
paper route, and his father beat the living hell out
24:39
of him. And granted, this is back in the day
24:41
when it was a lot more common to beat your children,
24:43
not to say that it was ever okay, because it's not.
24:45
But so for him, his fear of... that he's going
24:50
to make a mistake. And so he's overdoing, overachieving, overaccomplishing,
24:53
instead of just breathing and allowing his nervous system to go,
24:57
it's okay if we make mistakes, we're still going to
24:59
be successful at the end of the day. So there's
25:03
that conversation. You could also be a really, really high
25:07
achiever and your relationship is lacking because you don't feel
25:10
comfortable asking for your needs to be met. And so
25:15
that takes a reparenting of, okay, why we're Where was
25:20
it in your home where other people were allowed to
25:23
take up space and have issues, but you kept quiet
25:27
to allow them to have the room to have their experience?
25:30
And so that takes a reprogramming of how can I
25:33
learn nonviolent communication and use my voice to abdicate for
25:38
myself and speak to my needs and do it in
25:41
a way in which I feel confident. And I'll tell you,
25:45
you could be so successful with money, so successful in
25:48
your career, but be one 100% afraid to use your
25:51
voice at home, in your relationship, and you're a complete doormat.
26:06
Speaker 1: So the key for you, what you're talking about with
26:08
your work, is we create a baseline of safety. And
26:12
then once I create this baseline of safety, your whole
26:15
thing is liberation. It's about freedom. Right. So once I
26:17
have a baseline of safety, then we move into the
26:21
next components, right? One of the things that you talk
26:23
about is self-love. And so how do you define self-love
26:28
and why is it essential to liberation? Absolutely. Thanks. Wonderful question.
26:34
Speaker 2: I love the phrase that I say a lot with
26:37
my clients. You will only be loved as deeply as
26:41
you love yourself. Hmm. You teach people how to love
26:45
you through the way that you love and care for yourself.
26:49
And so giving yourself the grace to be exactly you
26:54
is self-love. Giving yourself the grace to say, healthy boundary,
26:59
I need to pour into myself right now. I can't
27:02
show up for you today. That is self-love. Giving yourself
27:07
the grace that, you know, I got this habit. I'm
27:10
not proud of it, but sometimes I do it. And
27:12
that's okay.
27:13
Speaker 1: I love and accept myself right where I am. I'm
27:16
going to do better next time.
27:18
Speaker 2: Because our gifts, our magic, our essence lies in the flaw,
27:27
in the mistake, in the quirkiness, in the weirdness, in
27:30
the different way in which you choose to operate in
27:32
the world. That's where the juice and the magic is.
27:35
And when you can love that part of yourself, that's
27:38
when you open up to freedom and of saying, this
27:42
is me. And when you're like, this is me, I'm
27:45
safe to be me, I love me, then your light
27:49
shines in such a beautiful way that the world rearranges
27:53
itself to give you circumstances that quite literally vibrate in
27:57
resignation with who you are, your authentic self. And then
28:01
when you live in that space, that's when joy comes.
28:04
That's when excitement comes. That's when confidence comes. And confidence, joy, self-acceptance,
28:11
radical forgiveness, embodiment, safety, that to me is freedom because
28:17
you can operate in any playground with those as your
28:20
tools and.
28:21
Speaker 1: Have a good time. Yeah, I can remember the first
28:24
time when I realized that I didn't love myself. My gosh,
28:27
we have similar stories and the fact that I also
28:30
lost my mother at a very young age and was
28:32
devastated and thought it was my fault. And she was
28:36
just trying to save her life and our lives by
28:38
leaving us. And, you know, and so that it created
28:41
this thing where I did a lot of things in
28:43
my life that deeply showed that I didn't love myself.
28:46
And I come to this place later in life where
28:48
I'm like, oh, yeah. And I can remember breaking open
28:51
first thing being self-love. And then once that once I
28:53
was able to find that, then it was, oh, the authenticity. Authenticity,
29:00
you know, I think is the highest vibration that exists
29:02
because To be able to connect into the field of love,
29:05
that unified field of love, the consciousness that exists for
29:08
all of us. I say it in this kind of way.
29:10
It's like we live in a world where there's a
29:12
human song, right? There's the song of humanity. And every
29:16
single 8 billion of us has our note. That is
29:20
part of the chords that turn into the music of humanity.
29:23
And if your chord is off and you need to
29:26
be pitch perfect and you're pitch perfect is your authentic nature.
29:29
And it is part of the song that we're here
29:32
to create. And so finding that authenticity and being able
29:36
to live into that. And I mean, for some of
29:39
us that are like you and I. that are a
29:40
little out there. I love that. Yeah, it's like, it's
29:44
so beautiful that, but when I really truly believe, and
29:47
I know for yourself too, like when I was able
29:49
to finally be the truth of my authentic self, It
29:53
not only drew the right people to me, but it
29:56
also repelled the people that didn't need to be. I
29:59
was like, I always used to say, there's 8 billion
30:01
people in the world. I'm only trying to help 1 billion.
30:03
The rest of them can go.
30:04
Speaker 2: I'm like.
30:07
Speaker 1: So it's like, right. It's like, so if you're, if
30:10
you're making everyone happy, then you're not actually authentically living
30:13
your truth. I love when I get an email that says,
30:15
I don't like that you said that or that you
30:16
did that. Or I, you know, any of those types
30:18
of things I'm like, uh, or, or this wasn't the
30:21
way that I, you know, I don't, I don't agree
30:22
with you on this. And I'm like, yes, because that
30:25
shows that you're finding the right people for yourself. And
30:28
so there's this beauty that comes in that, in that
30:30
self-love and finding that authenticity. And I love that, you know,
30:34
I agree that for me, it's such a liberation, such
30:37
a freedom. It's such a freedom.
30:39
Speaker 2: And that's literally, like I said moments ago, you teach
30:44
others how to love you and how to treat you
30:46
through the way that you treat yourself. And if you're
30:48
not a safe place to live, if you're not speaking
30:50
kindly to yourself, you can't expect to find a partner
30:53
or a community that treats you kindly and pours into
30:57
you and nurtures you if you're not pouring into yourself
31:00
and nurturing yourself. And I didn't, As you said yourself,
31:04
I didn't realize. I was like misconfident, walking to a party. Well,
31:08
to be fair, I was a heavy substance abuse, a
31:13
substance abuser when I was younger, trying to hide and
31:16
numb all the pain, which I didn't realize at the time.
31:19
But I would walk into places super confident and just
31:21
think like, I look good tonight. I'm thinking I'm like
31:24
super self-love, confident woman. In reality, I was just really, really,
31:28
really insecure and trying to do my very best to
31:31
act like I wasn't. And I had legit body dysmorphia.
31:35
It does not matter how tiny I was. I always
31:38
thought I was too fat. And combine that with being
31:42
a professional actress and a model, like, phew, my brain
31:44
was shot when it came to my vision of myself.
31:49
And considering the way that I treated my body, it
31:53
was clear I didn't value myself. I didn't know how
31:57
to nurture and take care of my body. I didn't
31:59
know any of these things. I didn't know authentic No
32:02
matter what happens, you're always going to be cared for
32:04
and loved. I didn't know that in my nervous system,
32:06
so how could I give it to myself? And how
32:09
you create that is whatever it is that you feel
32:12
you did not get or you're not receiving from others,
32:16
from the world, how can you give that to yourself?
32:19
And through the safety of you giving it to yourself,
32:21
you start to reorganize your nervous system to go, oh, okay,
32:28
being talked to really kindly in my mind feels good.
32:32
Speaker 1: I like this. Okay.
32:34
Speaker 2: And then your body starts to feel safe in that.
32:36
And then you start to attract other people who speak
32:38
kind to you. Looking at yourself in the mirror and
32:42
seeing cellulite on your legs and saying, oh my God,
32:45
I'm so fat. Or looking yourself in the mirror, seeing
32:48
cellulite in your legs and going, good job, body.
32:51
Speaker 1: You are storing up that fat. If we have a famine,
32:55
you are doing great thighs. Yes, nice work.
32:59
Speaker 2: Those are two conversations you can have with the exact
33:02
same thing happening inside of your body. And you get
33:05
to flip that and choose to give it to yourself
33:08
if you want to receive it from the world.
33:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, beautiful. Thank you for sharing that. It's so beautiful.
33:14
One of the other things we were talking about was
33:16
radical forgiveness. And I'd love to dive a little bit
33:18
more into this idea of forgiveness and the difference between
33:22
forgiveness and acceptance of behavior. Because I think that so
33:26
many people Especially when you've come from like, you know,
33:30
places where sexual trauma or abuse or, you know, these
33:34
things that are devastatingly challenging that we've called in, at
33:38
least we know on a soul level. And that's a
33:40
whole nother conversation to be had for, you know, like
33:43
when you hear the thing, well, I asked for it. Well,
33:46
it's not, I didn't ask for it. I, on a
33:48
soul level, I asked for the lesson that comes with
33:51
these challenges. But let's talk more about this idea of
33:55
forgiveness and how that's different from just saying it's okay
33:59
to accept this thing that happened to me and how
34:02
we can use that to really move our lives forward.
34:05
Speaker 2: Yes. So I'm actually right now with this present round
34:09
of Liberation Now, my group coaching container, we are right
34:12
in the thick of forgiveness work. So this is very
34:15
much alive for me. I've already done an EFT around
34:17
it once this morning with clients. But I love to
34:22
really presence the concept of forgiveness like debt forgiveness. We're
34:27
not saying what you did is okay. We're saying this
34:30
lesson happened to me. I've gone through it. I see
34:34
the lesson. I see the merit. And okay, I am
34:38
now more strong. I am now more whatever it is,
34:43
whatever that is that you gain from your recovery from
34:45
the situation as you are stepping into the mature version
34:49
of yourself. And the forgiveness is saying, I forgive this.
34:53
I'm not going to keep living in this space any longer.
34:55
I just let it go and I take my lesson
34:59
and I move the freak on. And that for me
35:03
is the act of forgiveness. It's the take the lesson,
35:06
feel and release the pain and give the attachment to
35:10
it away and move forward in your life. So more
35:14
like debt forgiveness than saying, oh, it's okay, no problem.
35:17
It's all right that you did that.
35:19
Speaker 1: No, not at all.
35:19
Speaker 2: I'm saying what you did was fucked up, but I'm
35:22
not going to live in it any longer because I
35:23
got my lesson. I've done the healing and I'm going
35:26
to just drop it. And that is the concept that
35:30
I like to really empower people with when they're doing
35:35
their forgiveness work. And also, you know, we're all a
35:40
villain in someone's story. There's people out there that are
35:43
like Veronica Kelly. Okay, that one is quotable, everyone. Put
35:47
that one out there. We're all a villain in someone's story. 100%.
35:50
And so, you know, forgiving other people, forgiving ourself, nobody
35:59
is better than anybody else. We all make mistakes, and
36:02
it's part of being a human. And being able to
36:05
own that helps to let other people off the hook
36:07
a little bit and move forward.
36:10
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was a big realization for me. Like I
36:12
have a lot of things that have come up in
36:13
my life recently and someone will look at me and
36:15
be like, you don't judge that at all. And I
36:16
was like, you want to know what I was doing?
36:19
You want to know where I was the villain? I
36:21
cannot judge that at all because I completely can tell
36:25
you stories of things that would just put you in
36:27
awe of like the way that I acted and the
36:29
way I was a villain in people's stories, you know?
36:32
Myself with you, like the same substance abuse, you know,
36:35
different things going on in my life that Um, you know,
36:38
we've raised very similar stories and like the ways that
36:41
we walked in the world at one point in time
36:43
in our unconscious trauma, you know, that, that affected so
36:46
many people around us, not only ourselves. And then you
36:49
get to say, okay, now I have to stand in
36:52
that on the other side and look at that in
36:54
a different way. So your program that you have, it's
36:57
called liberation and it's about freedom. And so I would
37:01
love to hear more about liberation, but I also want
37:04
to know, do you think freedom is the destination or
37:07
is it a way that we live?
37:09
Speaker 2: I think it's a realm in which you can live
37:11
that you have the most choices, joy, and experiences that
37:15
are in alignment with what and who you desire to be.
37:18
I think freedom is a realm that you create by
37:21
doing the healing, by doing the forgiveness work, by stop
37:24
judging yourself and opening up that everything is working out
37:27
for me, even if I can't see it right now.
37:30
And that is an amazing realm to walk through the
37:34
earth in because when you have that confidence that comes with,
37:38
I am free, I am safe, even if something comes
37:41
at me, it's going to work out for me. I
37:44
just don't see it right now. And that attitude opens
37:47
you up to miracles. It opens you up to possibility.
37:50
It opens you up to synchronicities that if you are
37:53
stuck in the fear, in the low vibration of shame,
37:57
in the low vibration of victim, you won't even... come
38:00
across the possibilities and opportunities and synchronicities that are waiting
38:05
for you. And so freedom opens you up to receive
38:09
the magic and the miracles that God, Great Spirit, universe
38:12
has waiting for you when you're available to them.
38:16
Speaker 1: Yeah, beautiful. So before we get into some questions about
38:21
humanity today, I would love for you to intuitively share
38:25
a EFT with everyone. Yeah.
38:28
Speaker 2: So how long do you want that to be, Melissa?
38:33
Speaker 1: Let's just give them a taste, like, you know, no
38:35
more than five minutes. I don't, you know, if that works. Okay, great.
38:38
Speaker 2: So we'll just go through and just some of the safety,
38:42
some of the points, the basic points on the body.
38:44
I will say a phrase you're going to repeat after me.
38:47
I offer you to do this, do so as well
38:50
at home. And hopefully you can see my face. If not,
38:55
I'll explain to you where to tap. So we're just
38:58
going to speak love and acceptance into ourselves and create
39:02
some safety. So go ahead and just start to shut
39:04
your eyes if you're able and just breathe into your body.
39:09
Noticing any sensations that you are feeling. Giving yourself this
39:15
moment of just presence with breath. Taking a little bit
39:21
more air in and out. And just identifying anything you
39:28
want to move.
39:30
Speaker 1: Anything at all.
39:31
Speaker 2: It could be anxiety, stress, fear, worry, lack, a tummy ache,
39:36
whatever it is. And so once you've identified anything you
39:40
want to move through your body, we're going to go
39:41
ahead and tap right at our eyebrow points where the
39:43
eyebrows meet the nose.
39:45
Speaker 1: Jet me.
39:46
Speaker 2: Repeating after me out loud. Even though I'm feeling this
39:50
way right now, I deeply love and accept myself.
40:00
Speaker 1: Outside of the I.
40:02
Speaker 2: Even though I've been having these feelings for a while.
40:06
Even though I've been having these feelings for a while.
40:09
I'm safe moving through them if I want to.
40:11
Speaker 1: I'm safe moving through them if I want to. I
40:14
think I do. I think I do. Big breath in.
40:21
No rush, though.
40:24
Speaker 2: I'm good enough right where I am.
40:26
Speaker 1: I'm good enough right where I am. Into the I.
40:29
Speaker 2: I allow myself to see myself where I am. I
40:33
allow myself to see myself where I am. And I
40:36
send myself so much compassion. And I send myself so
40:40
much compassion.
40:41
Speaker 1: I've been through some stuff, man. I've been through some stuff, man.
40:46
I might be going through some stuff right now. I
40:48
might be going through some stuff right now. But I'm
40:51
proud of myself. But I'm proud of myself.
40:53
Speaker 2: It is right at that cheekbone. Let's take a big
40:55
breath as you tap slowly. I am safe right now.
41:03
I'm safe right now. In this moment, I have my
41:06
needs met.
41:08
Speaker 1: I have my needs met.
41:09
Speaker 2: Between the nose and the lip. I love and accept
41:12
myself right now.
41:13
Speaker 1: I love and accept myself right now.
41:16
Speaker 2: I forgive myself for all that other stuff.
41:20
Speaker 1: I forgive myself for all that other stuff.
41:22
Speaker 2: And I open up to me being a-okay where I am.
41:27
And I open up to me being a-okay where I am.
41:30
There's no need to impress right now.
41:32
Speaker 1: No need to impress right now.
41:34
Speaker 2: I just give myself this moment to love myself.
41:38
Speaker 1: I just give myself this moment to love myself. Big
41:40
breath in. The chin. I don't have to be perfect
41:47
all the time. I don't have to be perfect all
41:49
the time. There is no such thing as perfect. There
41:52
is no such thing as perfect. I get to be me.
41:55
I get to be me. I like me. I like me.
41:59
I'm pretty proud of me. I'm pretty proud of me.
42:02
Speaker 2: I've come really far considering all I've been through.
42:05
Speaker 1: I've come pretty far considering all I've been through. I'm
42:08
pretty proud of myself. I'm pretty proud of myself.
42:13
Speaker 2: I'm going to let this uncomfortable stuff move out of
42:16
my system a little bit.
42:18
Speaker 1: So I'm going to let this uncomfortable stuff move out
42:20
of my system for a little bit. Any guilt from
42:23
past mistakes I'm open to releasing now. Any guilt from
42:26
past mistakes I'm open to releasing now. Every single person
42:30
makes mistakes. Every single person makes mistakes. I am surely
42:34
going to make more mistakes. I'm surely going to make
42:37
more mistakes.
42:38
Speaker 2: And I'm choosing to love and accept myself regardless. And
42:41
I'm choosing to love and accept myself regardless.
42:44
Speaker 1: Big breath in. Big breath out. The chest. No matter
42:51
how much I've been hurt in the past. No matter
42:53
how much I've been hurt in the past. I am
42:56
a sovereign human. I am a sovereign human. And I
42:59
get to choose to heal. And I get to choose
43:02
to heal. On my own timeline. On my own timeline.
43:06
Because I'm an adult now. Because I'm an adult now.
43:09
I'm well resourced. I am well resourced.
43:12
Speaker 2: I can get so much care for free on the
43:15
internet if I want to.
43:16
Speaker 1: I can get so much care for free on the
43:18
internet if I want to.
43:19
Speaker 2: There's so many meditations I can do.
43:21
Speaker 1: There's so many meditations I can do. So many courses
43:24
available to me. So many courses available to me. I'm
43:28
safe choosing to heal now. I'm safe choosing to heal now.
43:32
Go the side of the ribs. I give myself permission
43:35
to feel safe. I give myself permission to feel safe.
43:39
Speaker 2: I'm allowed to have whatever experience I'm having.
43:42
Speaker 1: I love and accept myself as I figure this crap out.
43:43
And I'm safe taking my time. I choose me. I'm worthy.
43:46
I'm about it. This is my time. And I give
43:48
myself permission to heal. Top of the head.
44:09
Speaker 2: I'm open to all the good the universe has.
44:12
Speaker 1: I am open to all the good the universe has.
44:14
Speaker 2: I'm letting go of guilt and shame on a cellular level.
44:18
Speaker 1: Letting go of guilt and shame on a cellular level.
44:20
I'm open to miracles. Open to miracles.
44:23
Speaker 2: And I deeply and completely love and accept myself. I
44:26
deeply and completely love and accept myself. Let your hands
44:29
come down and just take a big breath. Just let
44:37
your body ease into that. And if you notice any shifts,
44:41
you can go ahead and open your eyes. If you
44:43
notice any shifts, put it in the comments. You can
44:46
DM me on Instagram. Hit up Melissa. Let us know
44:50
how that landed for you. Did you notice a shift?
44:53
Speaker 1: How about you? Did you notice a shift? Oh, I
44:55
felt the energy through my entire body tingling.
44:57
Speaker 2: Yep.
44:58
Speaker 1: Absolutely. And it's so simple.
44:59
Speaker 2: And that's why I love EFT is because you can
45:02
instantly shift your energy at will. Yes. It's great to do.
45:08
Get a practitioner. learn the art, do the videos, do
45:11
the courses, work with me?
45:12
Speaker 1: Yes.
45:13
Speaker 2: But if you are trapped in a shitty situation and
45:16
you need to get up, go to the bathroom and
45:18
reset your energy field because your brain's playing tricks on you,
45:21
you can just tap on your chest and say, I
45:22
am safe. It doesn't matter what they say about me.
45:25
It's in my head. I deserve to be here.
45:29
Speaker 1: I'm worthy.
45:30
Speaker 2: And you can reset your energy field anywhere, anytime with
45:34
a quick little round of EFT.
45:36
Speaker 1: Beautiful. I love it. So we're in a collective. There's
45:42
a lot going on right now. What do you think
45:44
humanity is being invited into right now? Oh, yeah, girl.
45:50
Speaker 2: How much more time do we have on this podcast? Right.
45:55
Speaker 1: This could be its own podcast for sure.
46:00
Speaker 2: You know, I believe from what I've seen, what I've experienced,
46:05
and what I experienced, have the deep honor of being
46:09
invited into many, many, many people's internal worlds. Right now,
46:14
I believe that we're being asked to return to the
46:16
truth that we are love, that we are all one,
46:21
and that when one of us wins, all of us wins.
46:25
When one of us is held down and loses, it
46:27
affects all of us. And that takes an unlearning of epic,
46:34
proportional love programming and control that has been happening for
46:38
thousands of years. And now we are in that golden
46:41
space of can I love and accept and forgive myself,
46:45
love and accept and forgive each other, step into the
46:48
conversation of the teachings of Jesus and the Christ consciousness
46:52
of take care of each other. We need each other.
46:56
No one is better than anybody else. And that is
46:59
the energy that is starting to blossom amidst the collective.
47:04
And of course, that's rattles trees, it shakes old ways
47:09
of doing things, and it causes some to lose their
47:12
grip and their power on humanity.
47:15
Speaker 1: And that's okay.
47:16
Speaker 2: Because when you're in the birthing cycle and you're creating
47:18
a new way of existing that is brand new, that
47:21
has not been done for thousands of years, it is hard,
47:24
the labor is intense, it is loud. But what's on
47:28
the other side is so beautiful and wonderful and good.
47:33
And that is what I believe is being birthed and
47:35
brought forth through one heart opening at a time here
47:39
on this beautiful planet and this beautiful race of the
47:41
human race that we get to be a part of.
47:44
Speaker 1: Yep. We are definitely in a birthing cycle. I talk
47:46
about the same all of the time. And so our
47:50
last question for today is, well, this is the High
47:54
On Life podcast. So what does High On Life mean
47:56
to you?
48:01
Speaker 2: I think that personally for me, The more gratitude that
48:06
I can presence inside of my body and inside of
48:10
my day to day, the more joy, the more elevated
48:15
energy that I can bring forth to every situation because
48:18
I believe what you appreciate appreciates.
48:21
Speaker 1: And so to.
48:21
Speaker 2: Really have that high vibration of just life is awesome.
48:25
Like go outside, sit next to a tree, go to
48:29
a river, go to the ocean. We have such an
48:32
amazing planet that is so loving and so abundant and
48:35
so beautiful with so many amazing experiences just by being present.
48:40
And the more gratitude we have for those moment by moment,
48:43
the more great creator gives for us to experience. So
48:47
to be high on life to me means to have
48:49
the gratitude for the simple moments and give yourself permission
48:52
to play and have fun and have joy and do
48:56
it with people that you care about.
48:59
Speaker 1: Thank you, Veronica, for helping us liberate ourselves today. Please
49:02
share with everyone where we can find out more information
49:05
about you. Yes. So Instagram is great.
49:10
Speaker 2: Veronica AJA Kelly, Veronica Asia Kelly is my Instagram handle
49:15
that has my link tree, which takes you to my YouTube.
49:17
Speaker 1: I've got a lot of YouTube EFT videos.
49:20
Speaker 2: I do a lot of full moon ceremonies, free summit,
49:23
group coaching, 21 day freedom challenges, so many beautiful things.
49:27
And you can find those links there. And also my website, veronicakelly.net.
49:32
Speaker 1: Awesome. If you go to the show notes below, you'll
49:34
find all of that information. You'll be able to connect
49:37
with Veronica directly, please. Hit her up, find your way
49:41
to find your own liberation to create your safety and foundation.
49:46
And thank you all so very much. Bye. Bye, y'all. Blessings, blessings.
49:54
Take a moment and notice what shifted for you in
49:56
this episode. If something opened, clicked, or landed, share this
50:00
episode with someone in your life who's ready for more.
50:03
And if you're ready to experience a different kind of high,
50:06
one that comes from being fully present in your life,
50:09
not chasing something outside of you, download my free BlissRx
50:13
toolkit in the show notes. Inside, you'll find simple, powerful
50:17
practices to help you regulate your energy, shift your state,
50:20
and create more flow and synchronicity in your daily life.
50:24
Make sure you're following the show and I'll meet you
50:25
back here for the next episode. Get high on life.