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She Wakes Breakout Session | Amanda Denny · Life Community Church

0:06
SPEAKER_00: Okay, thanks.
0:10
SPEAKER_00: Do I need to talk in it right now?
0:23
SPEAKER_00: In the back?
0:24
SPEAKER_00: You can hear?
0:25
SPEAKER_00: Sweet.
0:25
SPEAKER_00: We'll get started.
0:26
SPEAKER_00: We'll wait in it for a couple more minutes, make sure everybody has some snacks, and then we'll get started.
0:31
SPEAKER_00: Embrace the silence.
0:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm not a silence person.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: I like music, but just try to embrace the silence for a moment.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: You can chat, but just you know, you know.
0:49
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's good.
0:54
SPEAKER_00: Am I not sure what to do with it?
0:56
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
0:59
SPEAKER_00: That's probably good.
1:03
SPEAKER_00: Here, start singing it, ready?
1:12
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
1:12
SPEAKER_00: How many checkers you have people are out here?
1:14
SPEAKER_00: Now we'll get started.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: Okay, sweet.
1:33
SPEAKER_00: Guys, I am so excited that you guys are here.
1:37
SPEAKER_00: I'm excited that you guys came back for day two.
1:41
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
1:41
SPEAKER_00: Who was here last night?
1:43
SPEAKER_00: Raise your hand.
1:44
SPEAKER_00: Yes, was it awesome or what?
1:46
SPEAKER_00: It was awesome.
1:48
SPEAKER_00: Hope is incredible.
1:50
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, I just wanted to start by introducing myself.
1:55
SPEAKER_00: My name is Amanda, for those of you that don't know me.
1:58
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm an admin here at Life Community Church.
2:02
SPEAKER_00: Pastor Sean, not sure if you know him, but he's our assistant pastor.
2:05
SPEAKER_00: I'm his assistant.
2:07
SPEAKER_00: So most likely when you're emailing him and you're getting a response that's coming from me.
2:11
SPEAKER_00: So you're welcome for the kindness.
2:14
SPEAKER_00: Um, and also, odds are is I probably know most of your names.
2:18
SPEAKER_00: I just don't know your faces.
2:20
SPEAKER_00: So we need to meet.
2:21
SPEAKER_00: We need to meet so I can put a name to the face.
2:23
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I'm also on the worship team here at Life, and then I'm one of the youth small group leaders.
2:30
SPEAKER_00: And I've been going here for 12 to 13 years.
2:34
SPEAKER_00: Is that my mom's over here right here, Angie?
2:37
SPEAKER_00: Been going here for quite some time.
2:39
SPEAKER_00: So this is definitely my home church.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: I love it, and I'm just thankful for where God's brought me to through it.
2:44
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm 23 years old.
2:47
SPEAKER_00: I was raised in Waterloo, and I now live in Colombia.
2:51
SPEAKER_00: Some of you actually know where I live, but I won't say that publicly.
2:54
SPEAKER_00: But you know, my commute is very short.
2:58
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, we're just we're really thankful.
3:02
SPEAKER_00: Um, this is my husband.
3:06
SPEAKER_00: You may have seen him on the worship team.
3:08
SPEAKER_00: His name is Will, and we have been married for coming up on two years, actually, which is quite crazy.
3:16
SPEAKER_00: Kind of not.
3:17
SPEAKER_00: It feels like it's been like 30 years, but then you know, also feels short.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: But um, quick story about how we met.
3:26
SPEAKER_00: I Will was going to church here for quite some time, and my sister-in-law would always point him out.
3:32
SPEAKER_00: She's like, he's so cute, he looks like Troy Bolton from high school musical.
3:37
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no.
3:40
SPEAKER_00: I knew who he was, I knew of him, and I was like, oh, I just I don't really think I like him.
3:46
SPEAKER_00: I just I'm not not a fan of what he's done.
3:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, but that's funny how God works because we went on our first date the day before I left for YWAM.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: That's Youth with the Mission.
3:59
SPEAKER_00: It's a six-month discipleship program, and the first three months is spent in training, essentially.
4:07
SPEAKER_00: You learn about the heart of the father, you learn about how to share the gospel to other people, and then the last three months is spent putting that to action.
4:15
SPEAKER_00: Um, I went to Tijuana, Mexico, uh, but Will and I went on our first date the day before I left for YWAM, and the rest is history.
4:24
SPEAKER_00: On the way to Colorado, I was like, hey, like what's going on?
4:27
SPEAKER_00: Is this a thing?
4:28
SPEAKER_00: And he was saying how he really enjoyed hanging out and he would love to see where God was going to take it, and this is where God's taken us so far.
4:35
SPEAKER_00: So very, very, very blessed by him.
4:47
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
4:48
SPEAKER_00: And it was around Christmas.
4:50
SPEAKER_00: Very, very sweet time in my life.
4:52
SPEAKER_00: And speaking of my family, right here, this is the Hamm inside, my maiden side.
4:58
SPEAKER_00: Um, my mom Angie, also right there, and then my dad, John.
5:03
SPEAKER_00: Uh, I have two siblings, Andrew and Alexander, and then their wives, Naomi and then Haley.
5:10
SPEAKER_00: Alexander and Haley now have a baby boy named River, and then they have another one.
5:14
SPEAKER_00: This is Lily Tatum, and then we have Lania.
5:17
SPEAKER_00: And goodness, the joy that those kids bring is incredible.
5:21
SPEAKER_00: They really are so sweet.
5:23
SPEAKER_00: And then over here we have Will's family.
5:25
SPEAKER_00: This is his mom and dad, Michelle and David, and then we have Sam, Caroline, and Gabby.
5:31
SPEAKER_00: And that is just a brief little little bit about my life.
5:35
SPEAKER_00: Um, but seriously, I am so excited that you guys decided to join me today.
5:43
SPEAKER_00: Um I'm an emotional person, so I guess I should start by saying that.
5:47
SPEAKER_00: There will be tears shed.
5:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, about two months ago, I had the opportunity to get to share this in the same exact room, same exact concept, and I got to share it with youth girls.
6:00
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it was such a blessing.
6:02
SPEAKER_00: It was such a blessing to be able to get to speak into their lives, um, to just share what God's done in my life, and just yeah, to just share that with them.
6:10
SPEAKER_00: And when I was asked if I wanted to do a breakout session for She Wakes, without hesitation, I was like, sure, like I already have it planned out.
6:18
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be easy, I'll do the same exact thing, just show up.
6:22
SPEAKER_00: I won't look at it till the week before.
6:24
SPEAKER_00: Well, in my head, God's plan was always my plan, right?
6:29
SPEAKER_00: But we all know that's not the case.
6:32
SPEAKER_00: That's not the case at all.
6:33
SPEAKER_00: So two days ago, God was saying, Hey, by the way, you're not gonna say anything that you had written out, and we're gonna start from scratch.
6:40
SPEAKER_00: So stayed up till two in the morning and just trying to write down all the thoughts, thoughts that God gave me.
6:46
SPEAKER_00: And then last night continuing to write down the thoughts.
6:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, and yeah, I'm super excited because I can tell that this is God's plan for you guys to hear this.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: Um, and I truly do believe that this message is for one of you guys in this room tonight.
7:02
SPEAKER_00: Maybe somebody who feels like there's no hope.
7:04
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you truly believe that you're never gonna find rest in your mind.
7:08
SPEAKER_00: And honestly, I'm not here with the perfect answer.
7:11
SPEAKER_00: Just this morning when I woke up, I was getting attacked in my mind, making me feel like I was not equipped, that I didn't prepare enough, that the way that I prepared wasn't good enough, that it took down the value of my what I have to speak.
7:26
SPEAKER_00: But as I'm sitting here today in front of you, I'm here to say it's God going to be speaking to you and not me.
7:31
SPEAKER_00: And we can't mess up God's plan.
7:33
SPEAKER_00: And so you guys are in this room for a reason, and I look forward to seeing how God touches you through this message.
7:39
SPEAKER_00: Um, but what let's start off with some prayer.
7:43
SPEAKER_00: Jesus, we love you.
7:46
SPEAKER_00: We love you so much, and and we're so thankful that you you care so much about us that you want to meet us in the sweetest ways.
7:53
SPEAKER_00: Lord, I just ask that your protection would cover not only this room, but every single breakout room.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: And I rebuke any attacks from the enemies trying to consume our mind with other thoughts or trying to make our minds wander.
8:05
SPEAKER_00: And we ask that your protection would just cover us with peace.
8:09
SPEAKER_00: Um, Lord, I ask that you would guide my words, that you would you would speak through me, that I would simply be a vessel, and that your Holy Spirit and your presence would be heavy upon this room.
8:21
SPEAKER_00: And I pray that our eyes would be widened and our hearts would be softened, Lord.
8:25
SPEAKER_00: We love you and we're here to worship you, and we want to bring glory to you, God.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: And so I pray that you would just give us the strength to do that today.
8:32
SPEAKER_00: In Jesus' name.
8:34
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
8:38
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
8:39
SPEAKER_00: Uh let me see what my slide is.
8:40
SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
8:42
SPEAKER_00: Um I'm gonna start by explaining something recently that happened to me.
8:48
SPEAKER_00: Um, about two weeks ago, I went to the City Museum with some friends, and sounds goofy.
8:54
SPEAKER_00: Do you guys know what the city museum is?
8:56
SPEAKER_00: Yes, okay, cool.
8:57
SPEAKER_00: Um, sounds goofy.
8:58
SPEAKER_00: It was literally a group of college adult-age kids, and they hadn't gone, so we were gonna go there.
9:03
SPEAKER_00: And when we were there, we went into this part.
9:05
SPEAKER_00: If you went there, you maybe remember there's a hole that goes under the ground and it's concrete all around you, and the hole's probably this big.
9:15
SPEAKER_00: So super, super tight.
9:16
SPEAKER_00: And we kind of got clogged up, and all of a sudden, I started hyperventilating.
9:21
SPEAKER_00: I was like, oh my goodness, started thinking about being underground, feeling in this wall, feeling, and I just started feeling overwhelmed with fear.
9:29
SPEAKER_00: And in that moment, I felt like I couldn't breathe.
9:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, we continued on with our day, but that feeling and that heaviness of my breathing continued to linger.
9:39
SPEAKER_00: I felt so out of control.
9:42
SPEAKER_00: I went throughout the day, we had youth later that evening, and I was still feeling the heaviness in my breathing.
9:49
SPEAKER_00: And you know, when you start to feel something and then you start to think about something, then it gets worse.
9:53
SPEAKER_00: And that's exactly what was happening.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: I started overthinking my breathing, the thing that I need to do, to where eventually I ended up spiraling out of control.
10:03
SPEAKER_00: We left, we went home, Will and I did, and and when we got home, I I fell into a humongous panic attack, just not able to capture my breath.
10:15
SPEAKER_00: Um, and it was to a point to where I went outside, I was trying to get fresh air, I felt like the walls outside were closing in on me.
10:21
SPEAKER_00: I felt like there was this heaviness, and I looked at Will and I've and I said, I think I'm gonna die.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: I think I'm gonna die.
10:29
SPEAKER_00: I was so attacked, I was so held captive to the fear and the overthinking that was going on in my mind.
10:37
SPEAKER_00: All of a sudden I started thinking amongst the spiraling, who am I?
10:41
SPEAKER_00: I can't do this, I'll never get out of this.
10:43
SPEAKER_00: What if this never goes away?
10:44
SPEAKER_00: What if I never feel joy again?
10:46
SPEAKER_00: And the enemy used the fear and lack of control to brainwash me.
10:52
SPEAKER_00: This caused me to start believing lies, but they started to feel like truth.
10:56
SPEAKER_00: And maybe you've been there.
10:58
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've been in a point where one thought turned to five thoughts, five thoughts turned into ten thoughts, ten turned into twenty, and before you know it, you have this story written out like me that I was gonna die just because I simply couldn't breathe for a second.
11:12
SPEAKER_00: I sat there and I I under when I was in that moment, I understood depression.
11:18
SPEAKER_00: I understood the feeling, a feeling like nothing could pull you out.
11:21
SPEAKER_00: This was me.
11:22
SPEAKER_00: I sat there.
11:24
SPEAKER_00: I wish I could say that this moment was simply a couple minutes minutes long, but unfortunately it lasted for hours.
11:37
SPEAKER_00: For those of you that have experienced moments like this, you understand the fear that's involved.
11:44
SPEAKER_00: You understand, you understand that feeling where it feels like nothing, nothing can get you out of it.
11:51
SPEAKER_00: Even the prayer, maybe the Bible verses people are telling you to repeat, feel like they're not good enough.
11:56
SPEAKER_00: They feel like they're not going to be able to rescue you from it.
11:59
SPEAKER_00: Um and now that I've had time to step away, um, and it granted it's not been perfect, every single day is a battle of my mind of not fearing falling back into that fear, but I've been able to see a few things that the Lord's opened my eyes to.
12:17
SPEAKER_00: And I want to share how in those darkest moments that they they led to a piece that I actually can't fully explain quite yet, but um, I want to share a few things that really stood out to me throughout this whole process that God up opened my eyes to.
12:32
SPEAKER_00: That night, amongst the spiral, my husband never left my side.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: He stayed, he prayed, he rebuked, he called me higher, he reached out for help, he asked for prayer from other people, and he continued to stay fervent in his own prayers.
12:48
SPEAKER_00: Truthfully, in moments where it felt like there was nothing positive to say or positive about what was going on, the simple voice just praying over me made the enemy tremble.
12:58
SPEAKER_00: The community around me, my mom, my dad praying, my husband praying, it scared the enemy.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: Even though I didn't believe that in the moment, even though I believed that I had no authority over his name, I was wrong.
13:11
SPEAKER_00: In the midst of the spiral, I ended up getting frightened and worked up because I started to fear that maybe I didn't have enough faith to be able to get healed or rescued from this.
13:20
SPEAKER_00: Like maybe this was my fault.
13:22
SPEAKER_00: Maybe if I would have just believed better, then all of a sudden I wouldn't struggle with the anxiety that I was feeling.
13:28
SPEAKER_00: But because of the community that I had, my dad, he reminded me of a story from the Bible.
13:36
SPEAKER_00: Luke 5, 17 through 20, and there's more to this, but briefly it says, On one of the days while Jesus was teaching, some proud religious lawkeepers and teachers of the law were sitting by him.
13:48
SPEAKER_00: They had come from every town in the countries of Galilee and Judea from Jerusalem.
13:53
SPEAKER_00: The power of the Lord was there to heal him.
13:56
SPEAKER_00: Some men took a man who was not able to move his body to Jesus.
13:59
SPEAKER_00: He was carried on a bed.
14:01
SPEAKER_00: They looked for a way to take the man into the house where Jesus was, but they could not find a way to take him in because of so many people.
14:08
SPEAKER_00: They made a hole in the roof over where Jesus stood.
14:12
SPEAKER_00: Then they left the bed, or then they let the bed with the sick man on it down before Jesus.
14:18
SPEAKER_00: And when Jesus saw their faith, he said to the man, Friend, your sins are forgiven.
14:24
SPEAKER_00: In that moment, my dad affirmed me that the community around me was going to cover the faith part.
14:32
SPEAKER_00: It was going to be okay.
14:34
SPEAKER_00: And this story right here showed the faith of the friends.
14:37
SPEAKER_00: Jesus saw that.
14:39
SPEAKER_00: And so that brought me peace.
14:40
SPEAKER_00: But I wouldn't have been able to have that peace if I didn't have the community to surround me and remind me of that peace.
14:47
SPEAKER_00: The Bible mentions several times that community is so, so important.
14:51
SPEAKER_00: Right here in Ecclesiastes 4 9, it says, Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.
14:58
SPEAKER_00: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
15:01
SPEAKER_00: But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
15:04
SPEAKER_00: Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
15:08
SPEAKER_00: But how can one keep warm alone?
15:10
SPEAKER_00: Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.
15:13
SPEAKER_00: A cord of three strands is not easily broken.
15:17
SPEAKER_00: So that's my first thing that I was able to learn through this is the importance of community.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: I was weak, yet my family was strong.
15:26
SPEAKER_00: They could see past the emotions that were blinding me.
15:29
SPEAKER_00: Um they were able to intercede on my behalf and help guide me out of the darkness.
15:35
SPEAKER_00: That community brought stability when I was unstable.
15:38
SPEAKER_00: And recognizing the value of having that community is so important.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: So my first thing would be ensure that you have community.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: Ensure that you have people within your life that can call you higher.
15:52
SPEAKER_00: This morning, when I was spiraling, fearing that I did something wrong.
15:58
SPEAKER_00: Whoops, it's not Siri.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: Rude.
16:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
16:01
SPEAKER_00: This morning when I woke up and I was overcome with fear that what I was doing wasn't enough.
16:06
SPEAKER_00: Kelly called me higher.
16:07
SPEAKER_00: She said, Amanda, this isn't you speaking, or this is the enemy speaking into your brain.
16:13
SPEAKER_00: If God can use anything, you have to tell the enemy to flee.
16:17
SPEAKER_00: Community can help pull you out of that darkness.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: As powerful as community is in that moment, there was another shift that had to happen in order to become set free from the hold that anxiety had over me.
16:32
SPEAKER_00: But this time it wasn't, it was internal.
16:36
SPEAKER_00: I remember that even after all of this, every day I would wake up and I would feel blah.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: I probably text my mom every single day for the past two weeks of, oh, keep on praying.
16:47
SPEAKER_00: I'm not really feeling like myself.
16:49
SPEAKER_00: Um I just wasn't really feeling like myself.
16:53
SPEAKER_00: Um, the intensity of the initial attack had passed, but still I wasn't feeling like myself.
16:59
SPEAKER_00: And I honestly, I really had no clue what to do with that.
17:03
SPEAKER_00: Um, you guys know that day after feeling where you have something happen the day before, and in that night, that morning you wake up and you're like, oh my gosh, like why'd that happen?
17:14
SPEAKER_00: I wish that would have never happened.
17:16
SPEAKER_00: And then you start thinking about why it happened, and then you're like, oh no.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: And you just start to spiral again and it puts you right back where you were.
17:23
SPEAKER_00: Has that happened to you guys before?
17:25
unknown: Yeah.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: Um, but when I was talking to my mom, she wasn't dismissing how I how I felt.
17:33
SPEAKER_00: She didn't say, Amanda, get over it.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: She didn't say, Hey, just stop.
17:37
SPEAKER_00: You're just getting a little too much in your head.
17:40
SPEAKER_00: But she encouraged me.
17:41
SPEAKER_00: She said, You need to see what the positive part is in all of this.
17:44
SPEAKER_00: She goes, When you felt anxious, did you quote scripture even though your mind was worried?
17:51
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
17:52
SPEAKER_00: When you felt anxious, did you pray and ask God to come fill that void?
17:56
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
17:57
SPEAKER_00: She's saying, That's good enough.
17:59
SPEAKER_00: You're good enough.
18:02
SPEAKER_00: And honestly, in that moment when my mom was saying that, that was hard.
18:08
SPEAKER_00: Because when your mind is in a place of spiral, it's so much easier to focus on all the things that you've messed up.
18:16
SPEAKER_00: But that's where we have a choice.
18:18
SPEAKER_00: We get to choose to think of the positive, and it's important to remind yourself of the hope that there is.
18:25
SPEAKER_00: It can be easy to slip into a cycle, but what you focus on is either going to feed your fear or it's going to fuel your faith.
18:36
SPEAKER_00: If you choose to continue to wallow in your negative thoughts, you're feeding your fear.
18:41
SPEAKER_00: You're giving space for the enemy to move in your life.
18:44
SPEAKER_00: You have to be willing to shift the cycle.
18:47
SPEAKER_00: I think we get intimidated as humans when something's difficult, or we get intimidated whenever we don't immediately believe something as soon as we speak it.
19:00
SPEAKER_00: And I think that's where we're wrong.
19:02
SPEAKER_00: We live in a society of things we coming so easily and so quickly, but we forget the importance of saying things until you believe them.
19:20
SPEAKER_00: Um, but for 22 years of my life, I would stand in front of the mirror and I would say, You're ugly.
19:28
SPEAKER_00: This isn't good enough.
19:29
SPEAKER_00: You'll never be good enough unless you look like this.
19:32
SPEAKER_00: I had a picture within my mind of what good enough was.
19:38
SPEAKER_00: When I went to YWAM, my my routine changed.
19:41
SPEAKER_00: I I lost weight.
19:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, I came home and people were saying, Amanda, you look so good.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: Amanda, you're you're a light.
19:49
SPEAKER_00: Amanda, there's just something different about you.
19:51
SPEAKER_00: And in that moment, I placed identity on myself that I wasn't good enough whenever I was heavier.
19:57
SPEAKER_00: I was good enough only whenever I lost that weight.
20:00
SPEAKER_00: Um, and I didn't realize this, but I carried that burden on my life and that identity for so long.
20:08
SPEAKER_00: Um, that caused me to over-evaluate everything I ate, over-evaluate what I was doing throughout the day, over-evaluate if I went on vacation and I ate too much food and I would come home and be fearful that people would say, Oh my gosh, she gained weight.
20:21
SPEAKER_00: Um and my husband and I just recently went on a trip to Kansas City, and the morning was spent, like an average morning, with a mandolin, and that was spending hours trying to figure out an outfit that I felt confident in.
20:37
SPEAKER_00: And we'll just sat there and he was just patient and he was just saying, You're beautiful.
20:43
SPEAKER_00: I didn't like that, obviously.
20:45
SPEAKER_00: I was like, No, you don't understand.
20:47
SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, we we ended up leaving, and when we got to our first destination, um he reminded me, or sorry, when we got to our first destination, I started feeling that insecurity creep back in.
21:04
SPEAKER_00: And he started taking photos of me.
21:07
SPEAKER_00: He was like, Okay, sit in the window, kind of pose, I'll get a cute picture of you.
21:11
SPEAKER_00: And and he took the photo and he showed it to me.
21:14
SPEAKER_00: And I was just, I was appalled, and I was just worried that people were watching as he was doing that.
21:19
SPEAKER_00: And the insecurity inside of me started building, and he said, Amanda, stop.
21:23
SPEAKER_00: My community said, Amanda, stop.
21:27
SPEAKER_00: What if not everybody's looking at you the way that you judge them?
21:30
SPEAKER_00: What if it's actually the judgment that's within your heart that you're passing on everybody else?
21:34
SPEAKER_00: And so this began a journey of recognizing the way that I was thinking was wrong and that I needed to renew my mind.
21:41
SPEAKER_00: This was the process of recognizing I needed to see the positive.
21:49
SPEAKER_00: I needed to wake up and say, God, thank you for this body that you gave me that works and gets me out of bed.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: God, thank you for this body that I can breathe.
21:57
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for this body where I can raise my arm to the Guy.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for having 10 fingers.
22:01
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
22:02
SPEAKER_00: I had to start looking at the positive thing.
22:04
SPEAKER_00: And in this moment this past week, God, thank you that you've given me the opportunity to be able to cling tighter to you amongst the strife.
22:12
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for the opportunity to grow deeper in communion and intimacy with you.
22:19
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for letting me walk through this.
22:21
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for letting me know you deeper.
22:25
SPEAKER_00: So what you focus on, it will either feed your fear or fuel your faith.
22:38
SPEAKER_00: Philippians 4 8 says, and now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing.
22:47
SPEAKER_00: Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right and pure and lovely and admirable.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.
23:05
SPEAKER_00: Now, shifting my perspective was definitely a great person step in the right direction.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: But it wasn't the end.
23:16
SPEAKER_00: I now had to start confronting what I was believing.
23:20
SPEAKER_00: It's super easy whenever we're feeling a way to kind of push it away instead of acknowledging.
23:27
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if you guys can relate to me, but I'm kind of the person where I know something in the back of my head, but I just don't want to admit that that could be a truth or that that could be a reality.
23:37
SPEAKER_00: And so I kind of try to just figure out every way that it couldn't be.
23:41
SPEAKER_00: Um for the waste situation in my head, the reality is I never know what's going to happen to my body.
23:47
SPEAKER_00: I never know.
23:48
SPEAKER_00: Like, I never know what's going to happen.
23:50
SPEAKER_00: I have no control over that.
23:52
SPEAKER_00: But in my head, I could control it.
23:55
SPEAKER_00: I could control it.
23:56
SPEAKER_00: But if thinking about the fact of not controlling it, I didn't want to deal with that.
23:59
SPEAKER_00: Instead of just acknowledging the worst that something could be and surrendering that fear to God, I allowed it.
24:05
SPEAKER_00: I wanted to control it.
24:07
SPEAKER_00: Um, but we can't do that.
24:12
SPEAKER_00: We have to live a life of full surrender to the Lord.
24:15
SPEAKER_00: We have to acknowledge the deepest, darkest fears and say, God, I feel this way, and I'm going to give this to you.
24:22
SPEAKER_00: I had to start recognizing the lies that I was believing and replacing them with truths.
24:29
SPEAKER_00: Romans 12, 2, I am sure that you've heard of it, whether you've been a Christian for your whole entire life or it's a recent commitment that you've decided to make.
24:38
SPEAKER_00: You've probably seen this on a wall at an Airbnb or in a bathroom or something.
24:42
SPEAKER_00: It says, do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is.
24:53
SPEAKER_00: His good, pleasing, and perfect will.
25:00
SPEAKER_00: This is when I had to realize that just because I was feeling a certain way didn't mean that that was the truth.
25:09
SPEAKER_00: Now, if you're anything like me, whenever I just said this Bible verse two, it kind of triggered something in you a little bit.
25:15
SPEAKER_00: Maybe a little annoyed, like, oh my gosh, like I'm just trying to get help.
25:19
SPEAKER_00: Every single time I go to these books about how to recover from anxiety or overthinking, they just throw this verse at me.
25:26
SPEAKER_00: But as a person who once believed that, I'm throwing this verse at you, and it stands firm.
25:31
SPEAKER_00: There's power in renewing your mind.
25:34
SPEAKER_00: It's physically looking inwardly, finding the thought that is consuming your brain, taking it out here, and remembering a truth about that.
25:49
unknown: You're good.
25:51
SPEAKER_00: How dare you?
25:52
SPEAKER_00: How dare you get a call from somebody that it's okay.
25:56
SPEAKER_00: It's okay.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: I like it.
25:58
SPEAKER_00: It just breaks.
26:00
SPEAKER_01: You're good.
26:01
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
26:02
SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah, put them on.
26:09
SPEAKER_00: Uh okay.
26:10
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm not sure if you guys have heard of Jenny Allen, but she's a Christian author, and she's written one of my favorite books that I've ever heard.
26:18
SPEAKER_00: And it is called Get Out of Your Head.
26:20
SPEAKER_00: And I want you guys to write that down because I think we all need to read it.
26:25
SPEAKER_00: It's called Get Out of Your Head by Jenny Allen.
26:33
SPEAKER_00: And when I was reading this book, I read it a couple months ago whenever God walked me through the deliverance of my body image issues.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: And I never would have thought I would have had to read it again, but here we are.
26:45
SPEAKER_00: I'm reading it once again.
26:46
SPEAKER_00: Um, but something actually it really stood out to me this time.
26:50
SPEAKER_00: And she has a quote, and it says, We have bought the lie that we are victims of our thoughts rather than warriors equipped to fight on the front lines of the greatest battle of our generation, the battle for our minds.
27:07
SPEAKER_00: When I read that, when I understood that my feelings are not always truthful, I was able to find freedom.
27:16
SPEAKER_00: When you're feeling alone, it's not true.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: Even though you might feel it or you might believe it, it's not true.
27:23
SPEAKER_00: When you're feeling lost or you're feeling hopeless, it's just not true.
27:27
SPEAKER_00: You're believing a lie.
27:32
SPEAKER_00: My dad was listening to a podcast, and I know I said this before, but man, I am so thankful for my family and my community that I've had that's just been praying for me.
27:43
SPEAKER_00: Coming to me asking me if I'm okay, checking in, being there to help redirect my mind.
27:49
SPEAKER_00: Um, and yeah, my dad was listening to this podcast, and he sent me something one of the days earlier this past week, and it it brought a process of walking through anxiety.
28:02
SPEAKER_00: And they say, recognize the lie, replace the lie with truth, and then renounce the lie.
28:11
SPEAKER_00: For me, it looked something like this the lie is that Jesus will not pull me out of this.
28:18
SPEAKER_00: The truth is God is going to rescue and restore my joy and hope and stability.
28:25
SPEAKER_00: I rebuke the lie that says that Jesus does not love me or hear me.
28:30
SPEAKER_00: I mean, even being reminded back to whenever God was walking me through the body image stuff, the lie was that my body wasn't good enough because it didn't look a certain way.
28:44
SPEAKER_00: The truth is, God never, never, never, never, never does God ever say that one of these bodies is better than the other.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: In my my breakout session um a couple months ago, it was more focused primarily on the body image aspect of things.
29:00
SPEAKER_00: And I put this in there to show at one point this is what the world said that was valuable.
29:09
SPEAKER_00: Then they said this was valuable, and then this, and then this, and then this, and this.
29:14
SPEAKER_00: This is changing, but our God is never changing.
29:18
SPEAKER_00: He's the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
29:21
SPEAKER_00: So why are we believing?
29:23
SPEAKER_00: Why are we looking at people and saying that this isn't as good as this over here?
29:27
SPEAKER_00: Why are we even noticing, other than a reason from the world, that this is different?
29:32
SPEAKER_00: God doesn't look at us and say, hey, you look like this and you look like this, you're different.
29:37
SPEAKER_00: That doesn't honor the Lord.
29:39
SPEAKER_00: And that's not something that we need to change about ourselves.
29:42
SPEAKER_00: We don't need to change ourselves to look like this and this, or this from this, or whatever.
29:48
SPEAKER_00: We need to change our way of thinking.
29:50
SPEAKER_00: You need to recognize in those moments that God, my way of thinking is wrong and your way of thinking is right.
29:57
SPEAKER_00: Renewing your mind.
29:59
SPEAKER_00: God, looking in the mirror.
30:02
SPEAKER_00: Amanda, you are beautiful.
30:03
SPEAKER_00: God's way of thinking is right, and your way of thinking is wrong.
30:06
SPEAKER_00: And it might be as simple as that, and that's how it was for me.
30:09
SPEAKER_00: Every morning I woke up, I looked in the mirror, and I said, Amanda, your way of thinking is wrong, God's way of thinking is right, you are beautiful.
30:19
SPEAKER_00: Even through the anxiety, Amanda, you think you're hopeless?
30:23
SPEAKER_00: Your way of thinking is wrong, God's way of thinking is it's right.
30:26
SPEAKER_00: And the more and more that we begin to say those things, the more and more we're gonna believe it.
30:32
SPEAKER_00: In this book, Jenny Allen, she has, I believe, a few kids, but I only can remember one right now.
30:38
SPEAKER_00: But her daughter is really big into neuroscience, but she's like in sixth grade.
30:44
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, wow, that's impressive.
30:46
SPEAKER_00: But she's really big into studying the brain.
30:49
SPEAKER_00: And that got Jenny also interested in studying the brain.
30:54
SPEAKER_00: And as Jenny was writing this book, Get Out of Your Head, she was studying the physical scientific science behind our minds whenever we struggle with anxiety.
31:07
SPEAKER_00: She was explaining that it takes us 10 minutes for something that we say to become a truth in our mind.
31:17
SPEAKER_00: Ten minutes for all of a sudden a foundation to be built on what you just said.
31:28
SPEAKER_00: So if you're looking in the mirror and you're saying, You're not good enough, in ten minutes, you'll feel worse.
31:35
SPEAKER_00: If you're looking in the mirror and you're saying, You're not, you're not a good enough mom, you're not a good enough wife, you're not a good enough friend, you're not a good enough girlfriend, you're not a good enough this, you will believe it.
31:49
SPEAKER_00: But that's not what God says about us.
31:52
SPEAKER_00: We have to renew our mind.
31:55
SPEAKER_00: We have to go back to the verse that says, do not conform to the pattern of this world.
32:00
SPEAKER_00: This, oh, this is not the world.
32:02
SPEAKER_00: The bodies, that's the world.
32:03
SPEAKER_00: We can't conform to that.
32:05
SPEAKER_00: Falling into anxiety and letting it spiral, that is the world.
32:09
SPEAKER_00: God brings hope.
32:11
SPEAKER_00: God bring God is peace.
32:13
SPEAKER_00: So we have to recognize I am believing like the world right now.
32:16
SPEAKER_00: I am believing that there is no hope.
32:18
SPEAKER_00: This is not true.
32:20
SPEAKER_00: By the renewing of your mind, recognize the lie, replace the lie with truth, and then renounce that lie.
32:40
SPEAKER_00: When you think you're alone, remember the truth.
32:45
SPEAKER_00: Romans 8, 38 through 39.
32:48
SPEAKER_00: For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
33:05
SPEAKER_00: You're not alone.
33:10
SPEAKER_00: When you think your situation is hopeless, remember, Romans 15, 13, it says, May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
33:25
SPEAKER_00: There's hope.
33:27
SPEAKER_00: We can't fall victim to our feelings anymore.
33:31
SPEAKER_00: Just because we don't feel good doesn't mean we need to believe that we're not good.
33:36
SPEAKER_00: We have to replace it.
33:39
SPEAKER_00: So I'm getting to mind really fast.
33:43
SPEAKER_00: So this is, we might have a little bit of time of reflection, but I want to encourage you guys.
33:50
SPEAKER_00: First, ensure that you have godly community surrounding you.
33:55
SPEAKER_00: No matter what age you are, it's important.
33:59
SPEAKER_00: We are not meant to do life alone.
34:02
SPEAKER_00: Ensure that you have godly community, that whenever you're feeling alone, that you reach out to.
34:09
SPEAKER_00: Maybe one of your wins is you know what?
34:11
SPEAKER_00: Normally I isolate whenever I'm feeling these feelings, but I didn't isolate today.
34:14
SPEAKER_00: I asked for prayer.
34:16
SPEAKER_00: That's a win.
34:21
SPEAKER_00: When things begin to spiral, start listening to the positive, start picturing the positive of what is going on.
34:30
SPEAKER_00: I didn't spiral.
34:32
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
34:33
SPEAKER_00: I was feeling bad whenever I woke up, but I still went to work.
34:37
SPEAKER_00: I was feeling like a bad mom whenever I woke up, but fed my kids.
34:43
SPEAKER_00: I wasn't feeling beautiful, but guess what?
34:45
SPEAKER_00: I put the outfit on, anyways, and I walked out the door.
34:48
SPEAKER_00: Every step of this is telling the enemy that he needs to go back to hell where he belongs.
34:54
SPEAKER_00: Every single thing and every single moment that you step into the authority that God has given you is telling the enemy that he is not welcome here and that you are a temple of the Holy Spirit.
35:09
unknown: Amen.
35:19
SPEAKER_00: But the Jesus way.
35:21
SPEAKER_00: And the Jesus way is just that.
35:23
SPEAKER_00: It's renewing your mind.
35:25
SPEAKER_00: It's recognizing that in your mind that you have things that are worldly ways of thoughts.
35:32
SPEAKER_00: It really means not letting the world or fear fill your mind with lies, but letting Jesus renew it with truth.
35:48
SPEAKER_00: For the remainder of the time, I would like you guys to go through the process and recognize the lie.
35:59
SPEAKER_00: Replace the lie with the truth and renounce the lie.
36:06
SPEAKER_00: The enemy has no hold over you.
36:08
SPEAKER_00: And maybe there's a person that's sitting in this room right now that's feeling defeated.
36:13
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're feeling frustrated that this didn't just change the problems in your life.
36:20
SPEAKER_00: But I'm reminded of a verse.
36:23
SPEAKER_00: The verse that says uh okay, I might need to hold up.
36:28
SPEAKER_00: Um hold on.
36:29
SPEAKER_00: Brief intermission.
36:32
SPEAKER_00: What was it?
36:32
SPEAKER_00: Who let the dogs out?
36:34
SPEAKER_00: Who let I'm just kidding.
36:36
SPEAKER_00: Maybe we need a Christian song instead.
36:39
SPEAKER_00: Okay, guys, help me out here.
36:40
SPEAKER_00: What Bible verse says, ask seek knock Matthew says no.
36:48
SPEAKER_01: Oh my God.
36:53
SPEAKER_01: Jeremiah.
36:59
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
37:00
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that is a good verse.
37:02
SPEAKER_00: That's a good verse.
37:03
SPEAKER_00: But it's not, but that's still good.
37:07
SPEAKER_00: Um Matthew 7, 7.
37:11
SPEAKER_00: Oh, Matthew 7, 7 through 8.
37:14
SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah.
37:14
SPEAKER_00: Matthew 7, 7 through 8 says, Ask and it will be given to you.
37:18
SPEAKER_00: Seek and you will find, knock, and the door will be opened to you.
37:22
SPEAKER_00: For everyone who asks receives, the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
37:29
SPEAKER_00: And I'm pretty passionate about this verse because I feel like we have a misconception of what this verse means.
37:35
SPEAKER_00: We see the ask and you will receive, but we often overlook the knock and the door will be open to you.
37:41
SPEAKER_00: If you're standing in front of a door and you're just standing and waiting, no one will let you in.
37:46
SPEAKER_00: No one will know you're there.
37:48
SPEAKER_00: You have to knock on the door.
37:50
SPEAKER_00: You have to say, I'm not believing this today.
37:52
SPEAKER_00: God, your way of thinking is right.
37:54
SPEAKER_00: You're saying I'm not going to walk in the fear and shame that I have.
37:58
SPEAKER_00: The door will be opened.
38:00
SPEAKER_00: God provides that hope.
38:02
SPEAKER_00: But you have to take action.
38:04
SPEAKER_00: Whether this has been something that's been on your mind for the past week, anxiety, or whether it's been something that's been a part of your identity, it's time.
38:12
SPEAKER_00: It's time to wake up.
38:15
SPEAKER_00: It's time to recognize the authority that you have.
38:17
SPEAKER_00: Even though you're not feeling it, you have authority in Jesus' name.
38:22
SPEAKER_00: And so, like I was saying, maybe we can break off into groups of our tables, or yeah, let's do that.
38:29
SPEAKER_00: Or you guys can partner up.
38:31
SPEAKER_00: Perfect.
38:32
SPEAKER_00: Um, but we're going to recognize the lie, we're going to replace the lie with truth, and then we're going to renounce the lie.
38:39
SPEAKER_00: And every day, your homework is to repeat.
38:42
SPEAKER_00: Every day you're going to look in the mirror, you're going to say, You're good enough.
38:48
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
38:49
SPEAKER_00: God loves you.
38:52
SPEAKER_00: You're seen.
38:53
SPEAKER_00: You're not overlooked.
38:55
SPEAKER_00: God chose you to be exactly the way that you are.
38:58
SPEAKER_00: Hey, you're not going to dwell in this anxiety today.
39:02
SPEAKER_00: You believe in God, you're strong.
39:05
SPEAKER_00: The enemy can't take that from you.
39:08
SPEAKER_00: And so I'm going to pray over you guys and maybe play some music.
39:13
SPEAKER_00: Hopefully.
39:15
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, Jesus, we love you.
39:19
SPEAKER_00: We're so thankful that you tell us we don't have to carry this burden alone.
39:24
SPEAKER_00: God, for the one that is feeling frustrated that they're still feeling the certain way of the heaviness, God, I ask that you would open their eyes to a new perspective.
39:34
SPEAKER_00: God, that you would put a passion on their heart to pursue a pure relationship with you, Jesus, to pursue the renewal of their mind, God, that they would take those steps starting today by renouncing the lie.
39:50
SPEAKER_00: Jesus, we thank you that you love us so much, that you provide hope for us in those dark places.
39:59
SPEAKER_00: God, we thank you for these moments that they open our eyes up to feelings we've may have never gotten to experience.
40:07
SPEAKER_00: God, help our mindsets to be positive about what's going on.
40:11
SPEAKER_00: Help us to see the hope that you provide.
40:14
SPEAKER_00: Jesus, I just pray that there would be an outpour of community on everyone in this room.
40:19
SPEAKER_00: I pray that they would be able to become sisters for each other, just helping whenever they feel down, Father.
40:25
SPEAKER_00: And we love you.
40:26
SPEAKER_00: And I pray that when they walk out of this room, God, that they feel lighter.
40:31
SPEAKER_00: That the lies that they're believing, when they were, when they were replaced it with the truth, Jesus, that they would feel freedom in that.
40:38
SPEAKER_00: And I pray this all in your heavenly name.
40:41
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
40:42
SPEAKER_00: So you guys are welcome to sit with your tables or but spend time with yourself for a little bit, just kind of writing out the lie.
40:50
SPEAKER_00: Let me go back to that slides for a moment, mind you.
40:55
SPEAKER_00: And go ahead and walk through these steps.
44:00
SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh, you should be able to be uh I do that.
44:16
SPEAKER_01: But these one, three, four, seven, two.
44:30
SPEAKER_01: Um relative spots, but