Latest / Live 100 Podcast with Jason Yarusi / Face The Facts Keep The Faith

Transcript

Face The Facts Keep The Faith · Live 100 Podcast with Jason Yarusi

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Reality without faith just becomes helplessness.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_00: But with Admiral Stockdale, he chose neither.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: He looked directly at his circumstances and he didn't pretend that they weren't terrible, right?
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: He was in a cage being tortured, but he refused to allow his circumstances to determine how the story ended.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: That's powerful.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: You are in charge of your story.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: Ask yourself three questions.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: Number one, what are the brutal facts?
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Number two, what do I still believe?
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Question number three, the most important one.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: What can I do today?
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever you're facing today, remember this.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: Don't sugarcoat the facts, but don't surrender to the future to them either.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: Your future, your life.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: Face the reality, keep the faith, take the next action because the situation you're in today may just be part of your story, but it doesn't have to be the end of your story.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: All right, let's go.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: If you're tired of not feeling fit, tired of just not having to focus, tired just not having the life that you deserve.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: This is Ways to be.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Jason Arussi.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: Today let's talk about facing the facts and just keeping the faith.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: You know, when we go through life, there are things that are just gonna get hard.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: And we're gonna tell ourselves some lies.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: The first one is that everything is just gonna be fine.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: And the second one, everything's gonna fall apart.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now, here's the truth: neither one of those can help you.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: When you think about this, well, okay, if at times everything's miserable, or if times that I'm just trying to find a way to hold on, how can I approach adversity and look at it in a way that that feels productive?
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Well, there is this one way called the Stockdale paradox, and it might completely change how you handle the hardest seasons of your life.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: So James Stockdale was a United States naval officer who was shot down in Vietnam and spent more than seven years as a prisoner of war.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: Years.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: Years, seven years, not days, not weeks, years.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: He was tortured, he was isolated, beaten, and yet somehow he survived.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: Years later, Jim Collins asked a Stockdale, and Jim Collins is the author of Good Degrad, how he managed and made it through something like that.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: And Stockdale's philosophy essentially just boils down to this.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: You must never lose faith that in the end you're gonna prevail.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: But at that exact same time, that doesn't mean that you can't just understand that you have to confront the brutal facts of your current reality.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: Now think about that, right?
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: You have to keep the faith that you're gonna get through it, but you have to be truthful from where you are.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: Think about that.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: Two things that can be true at the same time.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I mean, this is incredibly hard to do, is that I am gonna understand that this is the hardest thing, yet I'm gonna get through it.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: That's the stocktail paradox.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: Just think about that right now.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: If you just look at your life and just look at these days when you're just grasping for straws and you feel like all is lost, and you can feel better by just telling yourself you are gonna get through it.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: You've gotten through so many of these days.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: You found so many ways to see yourself to the other side of this.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yet you have to be brutally honest right now, like where you are.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, your car broke down, you have$20 in your bank account, you just lost your job, you just faced a divorce, right?
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: You just had um some ailment come up, you just got diagnosed with some illness, right?
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: You'll get through it.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: But the reality is that it's really hard.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I think most people just get one side wrong is that some people they live entirely on optimism.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna work out, something will happen.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: Next month will be better, but they never confront what's actually happening.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's like every week you're saying, Oh, I'm gonna figure out my finances, but never looking at the bills.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: You never confront what's actually happening.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: The business is losing money, the relationship needs work, spending too much.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, you're you're you're not being present with your family.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: You're you're just not doing the work.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: Optimism without reality, it just becomes straight denial.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: But then there's another group, right?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: They see everything as a problem.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: And you know these people, right?
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: They're like the Eeyores out there, like, whoa is me.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Everything's the worst, right?
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Everything's a problem, everything's a risk, everything is gonna go wrong.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: And eventually they convince themselves that there is just absolutely no way out.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: So I might as well just, you know, samura and sulk where I am.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: Reality without faith just becomes helplessness.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: But with Admiral Stockdale, he chose neither.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: He looked directly at his circumstances and he didn't pretend that they weren't terrible, right?
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: He was in uh a cage being tortured, but he refused to allow his circumstances to determine how the story ended.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: That's powerful.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: You are in charge of your story.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: You have permission to be in charge of your life.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Because maybe you're in one of those seasons right now.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe the investment isn't working out the way you expected, maybe your business isn't where it should be.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're just struggling financially and you're just trying to rebuild your health.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's just something that you're you're just dealing with right now that's just not going to plan.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Well, here's what I do: you answer and ask yourself three questions.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: Number one, what are the brutal facts?
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: Not the story or the excuses or not what you hope happens, but what is actually true right now?
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: Look at the numbers, look at your actions, look at your habits, right?
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: Look at what you've been doing and look at the results.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: You cannot fix a reality you're unwilling to face.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: Number two, what do I still believe?
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: And this is just so important because confronting reality doesn't mean that you're surrendering to it.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: You can look at a terrible situation and just say, I believe there's another side of it.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: Get back to it.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like you're in charge of your life, you're in charge of your story.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: I believe I can become better.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: I believe I can rebuild.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: I believe I can figure it out.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: I believe this chapter doesn't get to write the ending for me because this is just one slap chapter in my story.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then comes question number three, the most important one.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: What can I do today?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: What can I do right now?
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: Not six months from now, not when conditions improve, not when somebody decides to just magically come say me today, right now.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: Can you make the phone call?
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_00: Can you have that conversation?
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: Can you cut out that expense?
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: Can you do the workout?
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: Can you just go apologize?
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: Ask for help, right?
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: Make the decision that you've been avoiding for all this time.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: Do it right now.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: Take that one step because faith, it's not sitting around, you know, thinking, oh, and hoping things are gonna change.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: Faith moves you, faith pushes you to that next step.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where four, three, two, one go comes in.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: Four, three, two, one, go.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need certainty.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need perfect conditions, you don't even know or need to know exactly how you're gonna get to the other side.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's the beauty of you creating your own story and living your life and understanding that this is just one chapter and a big book that has full potential of hope, even if right now you have to be honest that it sucks right now.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: You need enough courage to confront where you are, enough faith to believe where you're going.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: So, and having just the discipline to take that next step.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: And whatever you're facing today, remember this.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: Don't sugarcoat the facts, but don't surrender to the future to them either.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: Your future, your life.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Face the reality, keep the faith, take the next action because the situation you're in today may just be part of your story, but it doesn't have to be the end of your story.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: All right, that's what I have for you today.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: This is Jason Roosy.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: This is the Little Wonder Podcast.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let's do this, I'm not sure.