Latest / Reality TV Cringe / 84: 90 Day Fiancé The Last Resort - One Last Time (S1E3)

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84: 90 Day Fiancé The Last Resort - One Last Time (S1E3) · Reality TV Cringe

0:01
Hi raccoon, Hi everybody, Welcome to Reality TV Cringe, where we serve
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you all the trash. Yeah that's fit to eat, yes, baby,
0:20
and I hope you're ready to eat some trash because we're talking about nine did
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Day Fiance, the Last Resort, so much trash in this episode. Now,
0:29
before we get into it, we have to give you a disclaimer.
0:32
Hid wife, Hidjia, kids, We are likely to offend you and it's
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not our fault, nope. So if you're sunset El, you might not
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want to hang out with us in a dumpster wear raccoons. We do what
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raccoons dollo. We are offensive as fu, so that's your warning. Also,
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com slash reality TV Cringe. We have so much bonus content we dare add
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free episodes, all that good stuff. Yes, and we'd love to have
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you. Yes, the more the merrier, and that's for sure. But
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bring some booze or some illicit drugs. Yeah for me. Let's make it
1:15
a real party, everybody. All right, let's get into this episode of
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ninety Day Fiance, The Last Resort, Season one, episode three, entitled
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one Last Time? Do you know that? Do you know what that is?
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In reference to maybe Klani Insulu one last time that we try to work
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on our terrible marriage. I guess that could be. But they hardly featured
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these two, and I know there was like one scende and that's fine with
1:42
me. I don't need them. I really don't care for either of those
1:45
people. But we pick up in this episode back at that fucking hot Tubs
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slime machine, where Big Ed is fighting with Kelly. We have Angela,
1:57
Molly, and also Liz, and I think Big Ed calls Kelly a bitch
2:02
for the second time. The second time, and this is when Kelly's like,
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cool, bitch, I'm out of here. I'm done. If you're
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gonna keep calling me a retired NYPD cop a bitch, then we got a
2:15
problem. So peace out and even Molly get out. Catching a case over
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you, Big Ed, I already got a case for that's allegedly abusing Molly's
2:23
daughter that nobody's talking about yeah, I mean I hope we get to that,
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but yeah, so he doesn't want any trouble. He's just like,
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look, I'm out of here. As he and Molly are leaving the hot
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tub, Liz's like, can you grab me a towel because I want to
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leave too, And Kelly's like, get you man to do it, get
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you man to Betty, Betty. That's hella rude, Yeah, low key.
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I mean like Liz was trying to get the fuck out of there too
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before it popped off with big End and Angela. Well guess what she didn't
2:50
get out in time? Yeah, because it starts to go crazy and I
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don't know, Angela looks really fucking drunk. Oh, she is so drunk.
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Dude is ed drunk? Probably, Yeah, Liz doesn't seem drunk.
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I was watching this with my husband, who I think kind of low key
3:06
likes ninety day fiance. Yeah, like he recognizes Everybody's like, is that
3:08
Molly who had the bra store? And I'm like, yes, but you
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remember all of that. He remembers Angela, who he calls a swamp peg,
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and of course he remembers big Ed, but he's just like, what
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the fuck is going on? In this hot tub right now, I'm like
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pandemonium, Yes, total pandemonium. My wife's the same way. She watches
3:29
this stuff and she remembers all these people because she pays attention. I don't
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know why. I mean, it's so trashy. How could you not pay
3:36
attention to it? I guess. I mean these people are spectacles. And
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so Angela is drunk when she gets drunk. My husband even said she's a
3:44
mean drunk. Yes, when she starts drinking, she starts popping off and
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she's yelling at Ed because Ed shouldn't have called Kelly a bitch. But at
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the same time, she understands ED, and Liz is like, can I
3:58
just get out of the hopped up please? I don't want to be She
4:02
actually does get out of the hot tub. Angela comments on her ass,
4:08
nice ass baby, and she's just like, Okay, I'm going to leave
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because I'm getting splashed. Yeah, and y'all are yelling and I just want
4:16
to go. And this is enough to set Angela off. Yeah, because
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apparently by Liz leaving and removing herself from this situation and not backing up ED,
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Angela feels the need to defend Ed and defend herself because she feels like
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Liz is coming after Angela. Now, it's like, I mean, at
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no time did she come after Angela. In fact, Liz is de escalating.
4:42
Yes, she's trying to remove herself from a very toxic situation. She
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can probably feel it in the vibes things are going to go left. And
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because she has the audacity to get out before it does, or try to,
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then Angela gets really fucking mad. Yeah, and I think the word
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bitch gets thrown in there some where. I don't know if Liz called Angela
5:01
a bitch or Angela called Liza bitch. I'm not sure. But Angela just
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starts going on a drunk, fucking rampage. It's irrational, it makes no
5:09
sense, no sense at all, gets right up in Liz's face and starts
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yelling and screaming at her. And I was, by this retreating from the
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hot time, yes place, she's trying to get back to her hotel room.
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Ed is following along watching Angela essentially assault her. I mean, yeah,
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do we have any attorneys watching? That feels to me like, if
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you're getting right up in my fucking face, you are assaulting me. You're
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in my space. Yeah, I mean I personally would defend myself at that
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point. I think I would have a case for self defense, for I
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would knock mema on her. You could take the mema, of course.
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I mean, come on, she's sixty years old. Yes, And the
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bigger they are, the harder they fall. She's all mouth, but this
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is the kind of person who is going to get them. I'm shocked she
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hasn't gotten herself in trouble yet with the way that she talks to people.
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Oh I know, well. She said later in the episode when she was
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doing her anger management therapy that she used to work at a prison, So
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she talks like this to the prison then hates. I'm like, what the
6:14
fuck is going on? Maybe maybe she was one of those wardens. Or
6:17
they're not wardens, they're just correction officers. Maybe she was like an abusive
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correction officer. I could see that who yielded her power and terrorized the prisoners.
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She just seems like an awful person. She doesn't know how to disregulate,
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she doesn't know how to turn it off or turn it down. And
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again she's literally chasing Liz, who, by the way, really didn't say
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anything inflammatory in fact, she was talking to Liz when she was saying,
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I just I'm unhappy and sad that you cheated yeah in the obstacle course with
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the coke bottles and hula hopes. Why did you do that? You cheated
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me out of an experience to learn how to communicate with you. And Ed's
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not hearing it, and Ed is so gleefully happy. I know that Angela
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is attacking his girlfriend. I know it's so weird, but when it's all
7:02
happening, you see Big Ed in the background with his little banky's little towel,
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looking like a little fucking tubby baby, just sitting there being like,
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oh, please stop plating. And then at one point, did you notice
7:14
that he went up to Angela because Angela was getting in Lizza's face. Lizza
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literally like this, trying to back away from Angela and her stank breath,
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and fucking Big Edge just taps Angela in the back and he's like, hey,
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you might want to you might want to pipe it down, And that's
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when security is coming. So Ed feels emboldened step in because he knows people,
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producers, other folks are stepping on the scene to take care of Angela.
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I again, was watching this with my husband. Of course I paused
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it. I turned to him and I'm like, if that were me and
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there was some woman essentially accosting me, what would you do? He's like,
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Oh, I would be in the middle of that in a moment.
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Granted my husband's sixty three, yes, Ed is so. My husband's a
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big dude. He would just get in the middle of that and he would
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not let any of that happen. But you would expect your husband or your
8:05
significant other to protect you against a drunk, raging creep. Yeah, abusive
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piece of shit. I'm sorry, But like Angela's behavior in this, I'm
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like, what the fuck, dude, you are safety really bad. You
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are a grandmother, you are a mother, Like, how can you condone
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yourself like this? How can you live your life like this? I think
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some people are just too far gone. Yeah, I think the older you
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get, if you haven't learned how to emotionally regulate yourself, if you haven't
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like actively proactively taken part in bettering yourself, managing your responses to things,
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and all you can ever control is yourself, right, if you haven't done
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the work to attempt to do that, by the time you're Angela's age,
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especially if you're drinking like this, there's no hope for you. This is
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just who you are for the rest of your life. And if she engages
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in therapy at the last resort, which I don't think she's gone to knew
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her and the iPad husband, I don't think she's really there to do that.
9:03
She's there for the check. I don't think therapy is going to be
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helping her anytime soon. I'm just disgusted by her. And again I go
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back and I'm sorry raccoons because we repeat ourselves on this. But even my
9:15
husband, who hasn't sat down with me for a while to watch one of
9:18
the ninety Days, he's like, why are they putting this woman on television?
9:24
I know, well, because she triggers a lot of people and she
9:28
makes a lot of people mad. So of course TLSE is going to be
9:31
like, cool, let's keep funneling the cash. Let's just keep milk in
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this cash Galper as much as we can. I know. It's really terrible.
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It's why Big Ed and Liz have all their fucking spinoffs and they're on
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every single Ninety Day Fiance franchise, even though they're not even technically part of
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the ninety day Fionce theme. They're both Americans. There's no there's no visa
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involved here. It's just because Big Ed once a million years ago with Rose,
9:54
with Rose, that's Philippines. So it's just ridiculous. It is ridiculous.
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I Yeah, I feel like TLC is trolling us, totally gets lighting
10:03
us, totally having these people on, like show after show, I'm like,
10:07
what the fuck are we doing? But I mean, granted, it
10:09
is a shit show, and I'm watching it, and I am watching it
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and I am entertained. So Kelly and Molly leave the hot tub again and
10:18
they begin walking back to their hotel rooms and they kind of have a nice
10:22
moment together. Yeah, they're laughing about Big Ed and his I keto fucking
10:28
fourth degree iketo black belt and he's just like whatever crouching Tiger, hidden dragon,
10:33
whatever this bullshit is, and fucking Molly straight up says that he looks
10:37
like a bowling ball or something. She called think hit a bowling ball,
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And I get it, and I get it, I mean, and so
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they're they're laughing about this, but then it kind of turns into the subject
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of don't you worry, Like I've got you and if somebody's going to be
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coming at you, Kelly said, you know, I'll protect you. Yeah,
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And this is where Molly turns it around and she's like, well,
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I actually don't feel that way about you. Yeah, I don't feel like
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you're going to take care of me because you moved to Georgia and you quit
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your job and you said on the couch and you acted like a bachelor,
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And here we go again. She's just ruining a nice moment, of course,
11:15
and he I think he says it in this scene or in his talking
11:18
head, He's like, what are we even doing here? Like, how
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do we even get from this nice, little peaceful moment to this? But
11:22
then in the back of my mind, I'm just thinking, well, if
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you assaulted her daughter though, I mean, she's probably holding a lot of
11:31
anger from that, and she's just lashing out because it's the TV show.
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I don't know, right allegedly, I guess so, but they're boring,
11:37
and I agree, I don't know why you're on the show. We cut
11:41
over to Kolani and a Sulu and they're having a weird, awkward, nice
11:48
moment on our conversation. She's letting him block her side pieces phone number on
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her phone, and I'm like, what about Instagram? I know, what
11:56
about all your social media? And you didn't delete number. It's just showing
12:01
up and you're blocked, and then you can un I mean, do you
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think Asilu stupid? Yes, it was supposed to be rhetorical. She does
12:09
think a swoiler is stupid? Yea. And then he's like, can I
12:13
kiss you? And she's like, well, you can hug me, and
12:15
he gives her kiss on the forehead and they hug. And so it seems
12:18
like Colani is going to be trying, but I don't believe it. I
12:22
think she's already falling in love with the Nudzi oh to new Man. I
12:28
think Collini, her sister, who's also at the marriage counseling retreat for some
12:31
fucking reason. I mean, I think Collini is also encouraging her on the
12:37
sideline to get with a new guy. Yes, she totally is. She
12:41
would want more than anything for a Sulu to be out of the fucking picture.
12:45
She hates, She's always hated. Yeah, So I mean she's like,
12:48
come on, girl, TikTok, why are we even here on the
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show right now. Yeah, for real, back at Big Ed and loses
12:56
hotel room. They're still fighting. She's speaking very calmly. She is for
13:01
what an absolute shit show and catastrophe that night was, Like, I'm amazed
13:05
at her ability to keep it together. She's trying to tell him like,
13:09
I didn't do anything to Angela to deserve her attacking me like that, And
13:15
all he is saying is like, well, you deserve you did deserve it.
13:18
Yeah, you deserved an ass chair. I'm glad that I saw it.
13:22
Dude. Finally somebody's sticking up for me. I'm like, what the
13:26
heck. So he's mad at Liz for not backing him up when he was
13:28
obviously in the wrong. Like he's like, no, you have to be
13:33
my ride or die no matter what, even if I'm a piece of shit
13:35
and I'm doing things that are bad and I'm fucking up, you have to
13:39
be my ride or die. Correct. That's wild. Yeah, he's just
13:43
a fucking pamper baby. He's just an immature cantalope, my friend. He's
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got no emotional capacity. He's happy like he's on an elementary school ground because
13:54
somebody stuck up for him. Yeah, no matter that this person who stuck
13:58
up for you is the most vile and awful person on television currently. You're
14:01
our lord. He doesn't care. No, he doesn't care. And I'm
14:05
like, dude, you're almost sixty years old, legits for real, and
14:07
this is how you're thinking, Like, well, I was bullied when I
14:11
was the baby, and because I was bullied, this is the first time
14:16
in my life anybody has ever stood up for me. I'm like, oh
14:20
God, spare me, old man, crime me a fucking river for real.
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I'm like, grow the fuck up, dude. Yeah, I was
14:31
bullied a lot. I want people to stand up for me, even though
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it's Angela. I'm glad that somebody backed me up for what for being a
14:39
piece of shit to Kelly for being drunk and calling him a bitch and then
14:43
cheating at the fucking weird hula hoop games on the beach. I'm just like,
14:48
what do you want? What's happening? Please tell me that by the
14:50
time I'm fifty seven or you're fifty seven, we don't think like that.
14:54
I mean, I'm not going to need anybody to fight my battles. I'm
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not going to need anybody to be my mouthpiece. I'm hoping I'll be able
15:01
to take care of that myself, right, I'm not going to need somebody
15:05
to fucking tag in and take care of my shit. Yeah, I'm just
15:09
gonna want to I'm just gonna want to keep it calm. I'm gonna want
15:11
to keep it three. And if this relationship isn't working for me, and
15:15
if I feel like my partner isn't sticking up for me, then I'm going
15:16
to leave. Yeah, I'm gonna be mature enough to make a different choice
15:20
for myself. But not Big pread No, because he knows what he looks
15:24
like. Then he you think he does. I think I feel like he
15:28
thinks he's hot fucking stock. I don't think he thinks I think he has
15:31
a mirror, right. I think that's a fucking facade. Man. I
15:33
think he is so deeply insecure. That's why he latches on to Liz,
15:37
because she's for some reason it's still attached to Big Eggs and like, I
15:43
don't know, she's so weird to me. And I say this every fucking
15:46
episode, I swear, because there's some moments with Liz where I'm like,
15:52
Okay, you seem like you actually care about big pread and you seem like
15:56
you're emotionally attached to this dude for some reason. And then there's other moments
16:00
where I'm like, Okay, you're probably just here to for the cloud.
16:03
Yeah, and because you may have a drinking problem, Like I don't know,
16:07
may she may have. I think definitely, although in the hot tubs
16:10
she seems sober. But my husband said the same thing. He's like,
16:12
she seems like a normal person. Yeah, she's like a young thirty year
16:15
old whatever, and she seems like she's an average person. Why I don't
16:21
think she was big ed And she just can't get through to him. He
16:23
keeps on cutting her off, talking over her, and finally she's like,
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I'm gonna go sleep on the fucking couch. He goes into his bedroom and
16:33
he drinks a whole bottle of wine and that's how they leave it that night.
16:37
Meanwhile, yeah, somewhere else at the last was sord We have a
16:41
dinner going down with Jovi and Yarra. Now Jovi is still but her because
16:47
Yarra had the auticity to bring up their problems in a group counseling sessions.
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Yeah, and he's like, I don't want these fucking losers to know about
16:59
our issues and just to bring you guys up to speed. Last week,
17:02
Yara shared in the group's session that she has been taking birth control for a
17:07
while and you know, Joe Vie, he really wants a second child.
17:11
Yeah, and he was hurt by that because she brought it up in front
17:14
of everybody else and that she should have felt the need to communicate that with
17:18
him together privately, away from everybody else. I think he even says,
17:22
I can't remember if it's in the dinner or in their argument where he says
17:25
we don't need to be like Klanni in Pezuelu and release all of our dirty
17:29
laundry to everybody, which I guess I understand, but I'm like, this
17:32
is the show, though, Joy, this is why we this is how
17:36
group therapy works. Don't you know what you signed up for? But he's
17:38
also a man baby, yeah, and he is freaking out over nothing.
17:42
It's just birth control. It's not that big of a deal. It's not
17:45
like she got her fucking tubes died, or got her hysterirect to me and
17:49
didn't tell you, or she's fucking somebody else. It's just up Hill but
17:53
just to play Devil's advocate. A discussion about reproductive health and these types of
18:00
choices. This is really something you should be able to have with your significant
18:04
other. Now, maybe their relationship is so fucking toxic that she doesn't feel
18:08
comfortable or safe to have that conversation with him, and that I think is
18:12
kind of the genesis of his biggest problem. He does mention three things that
18:17
he's pissed off about, well four things. He's pissed that she brought it
18:19
up in front of the group session, So now all of these chromagnan troglodytes
18:26
know about their issues, and he's like, I can't believe it. I'm
18:27
so much better than these people. Why are we sharing our ship. He's
18:30
pissed that she wanted to get an apartment in the Czech Republic right and that
18:37
she was making plans to do so without consulting him. He's pissed that she
18:41
also wanted to relocate to Europe and wasn't even talking to him about that.
18:45
And now he's pissed that, Okay, now you're also on birth control and
18:49
you're not telling me about this, and so he proceeds to call her controlling
18:53
and manipulative. Now for me, I get it. Yeah, I mean
18:57
I feel like his points are valid. I mean I would never want to
19:00
be married to him. No, I mean, mister, I'm at the
19:03
stripper on our anniversary. I'm at the strip club on our anniversary, and
19:07
all he cares about is sex, it seems, yeah, and yarra when
19:11
he's bringing all of these concerns up. And I watched these seasons with them,
19:15
even though they were very boring. I watched these seasons and he's right,
19:18
like she hid all of that ship from him, and she didn't talk
19:21
to him about it, and she is very kind of elusive because I don't
19:25
think she's really happy with him. I think they got pregnant and she's like,
19:29
well, shit, now I'm stuck with this dude. She is way
19:33
out of his league. I don't know what he does. Does he work
19:36
like on an oil rig or something. I think he does. He travels
19:38
and he makes you a good living, but like he's gone a lot.
19:42
She is way out of his league. I think he knows that fundamentally.
19:45
I think she knows that fundamentally, and she's like, fuck no, I
19:49
don't want to get knocked up for the second time and prolong this situation that
19:53
I'm currently and I want to move back to Europe. And I bet if
19:57
she moved back to the Czech Republic or too, she can't go to Ukraine.
20:00
But if she moved back to Prague, for example, I don't think
20:03
that they would stay together. Oh, no way at all. I think
20:06
she'd take that baby and run. Oh totally. And that's what he's afraid
20:08
of. But in this conversation, she's like totally denying everything. She's like,
20:12
no, I don't do that, and she's getting mad at him and
20:15
getting upset with him and says that she felt like she couldn't talk to him
20:19
privately. She felt like she had the only way she could talk to him
20:22
was through the group session. And he just doesn't get it either, because
20:26
I don't think he's a kind of person that you can't really talk to about
20:30
those kinds of things either. Though he drinks a lot, does he?
20:33
So I don't know the story. Okay, he drinks a lot, he
20:34
likes to party. He's you know, before he met her, he was
20:37
like a thirty something bachelor and wanted to be like that forever. And so
20:42
it's just like he's kind of a man child. He's kind of immature,
20:45
continuing to live that way while wanting to saddle her with two kids and to
20:49
be a stay at home mom. Well, in the conversation, I felt
20:53
like he had these valid, valid points, and as soon as he made
20:56
them, she started to cry. And as soon as he started to cry,
21:00
well, now the conversation really can't continue, which I think frustrated him,
21:06
And so ultimately they leave the dinner and he grabs the bottle of booze
21:11
and he goes his separate way. She goes back to the hotel room.
21:15
Later that night, Yes, we find that he hooked up with Angela,
21:19
not hooked up like sex. She found Angela at the bar or whatever,
21:23
and they kind of connected and hung out all night, And at like two
21:27
or three in the morning, Angela and Jovi go back to Jovi's room.
21:30
Yara's trying to sleep, She's getting her beautifully. She meets their sleep and
21:37
they're just banging around drunk as hell. Angela's got her motherfucking nineteen eighty seven
21:44
boom box playing I don't know, kid and play, were they a band
21:48
whatever, just playing whatever she's playing. So they go out on the porch.
21:51
It's a resort. People are tried asleep and they're just partying, and
21:55
they try to wake up Yarra because hello, we're in the keys. We're
21:59
not serious about therapy. Party, let's party. Yeah, And apparently Yard
22:03
didn't want to do that. This pisses her off. And apparently this is
22:07
the fight that we got the preview of last week, dum, which is
22:11
just such a letdown. I'm they're fighting the next morning and Yar's super pissed,
22:15
yelling at Jovi and he's cowering in the corner of the bed, probably
22:18
hungover as fuck. Yeah, and she's just like, how dare you bring
22:22
another woman to me? I mean, with Angela rolling around in your bed,
22:29
it sounds like she was just kind of walking through the room to get
22:30
to the patio so she could play her really hot beats, I know,
22:34
fucking beastie boys. Yeah, she was probably just stumbling around drunk his fuck
22:38
with a titty hanging out, trying to wake you up. Party. I'm
22:41
a mem and I'm sixty, like whatever, it's a two week fucking resort.
22:45
It's not You don't even have Mila Nick. You don't even have anything
22:48
to worry about but she's freaking the fuck out at Jovi, and then she
22:52
starts escalating and escalating, yelling at him, yelling at him, and then
22:56
she tells him, you're the one that has a problem and you need to
22:59
go to rehab. You are the problem, yeah, as if he's the
23:02
problem in their entire relationship, not her, of course, and which he
23:06
says, but I'm the problem, just me, and she's like, yeah,
23:10
you are the fucking problem. You need to go to rehab. She
23:12
calls it sickening, and I think she said you're disrespectful, to which she
23:17
said, you're disrespectful. How do you like it? You're disrespectful for going
23:21
on birth control without telling me, blah blah blah. So they're screaming at
23:25
each other. She starts crying again. She locks herself in the bathroom and
23:27
oh my god, I'm glad I'm not in my twenties anymore. Like so
23:32
dramalicious, calmed down, I don't breakfast, have an omelet and a mimosa,
23:38
just like feel the vibe. I didn't have to be so really,
23:45
and fucking Jovi goes in, I know, and it's like, I'm sorry,
23:48
but are you okay? Just leave her alone, just like put it
23:52
on pause. It's okay, she's going to be there. Yeah, when
23:55
you stand up and go get your next drink, well, you know,
23:57
it's just gonna be him being like, are you okay we have sex now?
24:00
Yeah, it's all right. Are you taking your pill today? Though,
24:03
these people elsewhere on the island, we have Colanni and Collini sitting down
24:10
to have a discussion about Colanni is such a such a martyr. I'm sacrificing
24:15
my side piece, my good side dick, so that I can really work
24:19
on my marriage job so bad? For how much you heard us, swilu,
24:23
if you're still talking to my side piece, and so I let him
24:26
block him, and Collini's say, that's probably the right thing to do,
24:30
since you are at a group counseling retreat and trying to work on your marriage,
24:34
that's what you say you want to do. Sorry about my wig,
24:37
guys, that's not aware wig. It's great. It's like fucking going backwards.
24:41
It's pretty soon it's just going to be. So is that better?
24:45
I like, all right, everybody, am I having my and Margaret moments?
24:48
Thank you? And so they're having the conversation. Colanni's talking a little
24:52
bit about big Ed talking too much, and how Liz is very sweet,
24:57
and how she's excited to be there with Molly. But pretty much, I'm
25:00
just bored. It's super boring. And I did see a thing on Kolani's
25:06
story. By the way, the reason why she brought the kids there and
25:08
Collini is because she's a mom first and has never been away from her kids,
25:12
and she's never going to travel out of state without of her kids.
25:15
Okay, so she has to bring her kids to this two week Wow couples
25:19
resort retreat. She's a mama bear. Yeah, I'm a mom first.
25:25
I care about my kids while I'm also parading around my affair on National TV.
25:30
Int I'm proud of it. Yeah, And she even tells Collini like,
25:33
you know, I'm actually kind of happy that I got that Hall pass
25:37
and I was able to fuck somebody besides Asulu, And now I know what's
25:41
possible. I know all the dicks in the world. I know it's possible.
25:47
And so do I really want to stay with USUALU or do I want
25:49
the world to open up for me and my vagina vagina to open up for
25:55
the world. Just think of all the possibility. Oh, I'm like,
26:00
get off my show. You're not here, You're not serious. And the
26:03
sad thing I think is that Assuelu is. Yeah. I think he's serious
26:07
and he wants to be here to do the work. I don't know if
26:08
he can. I don't know if he unders stands what is happening. I
26:14
know, but I think his heart is in the right place. I kind
26:17
of feel bad for him in that regard because I feel like he's just like
26:21
really dumb. He he just wants their family to work, and he fucked
26:26
it up and to begin with, and now he's like trying to fix it,
26:30
but it's like it's done. It's never gonna go back to you.
26:33
Just don't forget that. He was nineteen when he met Kolani, twenty one
26:37
when they got married, and she's from a different place. She I think
26:42
also took advantage of him. She's never been a soft place to land for
26:47
Ausuelo. She's always been a battle axe. And so this whole thing is
26:51
tortured and awful and you both just need to break up. And I heard
26:55
that Asuelu moved I think to Vegas really, and she's still in southern California.
27:00
Banging her hop a boyfriend. Of course, I wonder what their custody
27:03
issue is. Like she's got the kids, I mean yeah, but like,
27:06
is she gonna be like Devon from Nan is going to have to travel
27:11
back to southern California to see his kids. I mean, but that's what
27:15
you signed up for, and you always get what you settle for. So
27:18
if you're going to settle for Kolani or Kolani, if you're going to settle
27:22
for Asuelu, then here we are. Hello, this is what we have.
27:26
Yep, shut your damn mouth. Moving on. We have this really
27:30
poignant and I want to say emotional scene between Angela and one of the Rando
27:37
Last Resort therapists that I can't name because I don't care. The therapist just
27:42
caught wind, Yes, that Angela practically assaulted Liz the night before because she's
27:48
a drunk, creepy fool. Yes, And so the therapist trundles on over,
27:53
wakes up Angela. She's gonna fucking hang over. Angela comes out in
28:00
her robe and sits down across from the therapist and they start to hash it
28:03
out. Yes, and the therapist sits her down and says, so I
28:07
heard there was an incident last night and we need to talk to you about
28:11
it. And Angela's first thought is like, who read it on me?
28:15
Like, you are nuts, dude, you are absolutely nuts. And I
28:18
think in her talking head she's like, whoever said something, well, they
28:22
mess with the wrong bitch, or something to that effect. I'm like,
28:26
Okay, so now there's going to be another fight that we're going to see
28:29
inevitably in the future between you and probably Liz again, because you're probably gonna
28:33
accuse her. I don't know, but the anger management counseling is for Angela
28:37
only, and Angela feels attacked by this. And Angela says, I feel
28:42
like I'm the bad person because the therapist is coming to talk to me.
28:47
And I'm like, yes, so then you get it. You get it.
28:49
Great job. Therapy is working. God. She feels attacked that somebody
28:55
would call her out on her bad behavior. She also is writing this weird
29:00
story in her mind about what happened in the hot tub. Yeah, like
29:03
when Liz was saying that Ed is talking over me and not letting me get
29:08
a word in edgewise. It reminds me, Angela's thinking. It reminds me
29:12
of Michael and the ship that he says to me, and I just got
29:15
really triggered, and I got really upset. And so at the end of
29:18
the day, what we I guess learn is that anytime there's conflict around Angela,
29:26
it triggers something in her, an ancient pain, if you will,
29:30
the suffering that she's gone through all of her life, the knife and the
29:33
kidneys, oh wrong show. But anytime anybody's arguing or if there's a problem,
29:38
like she immediately goes into full on irrational overreaction and she has this ah
29:45
moment where she goes ah with her veneers. She's, Aha, that's my
29:48
problem, that's what I need to fix, and here we go. Eureka.
29:52
I'm just like, this is a fake epiphany though this is g Surely
29:56
you know that you're an awful person who overreacts by now. Of course,
30:00
if you're seventy thousand years old, then I'm sure you would have figured that
30:04
out by now. But she's never going to learn from it and change her
30:07
behavior because she likes this part of herself. This is her defense mechanism for
30:11
how terrible and awful she is. She has to be so disgusting to everybody
30:17
else. She doesn't think she's disgusting. No, that's what I'm saying.
30:21
She is so unconscious. Yes, it really disturbs me that there are unconscious
30:26
people on our planet. I know, like walking around our planet just fucking
30:30
unconscious, free radical people. We're just bumping into everything other people's situations,
30:36
experiences and damaging people and they don't even know they're doing it because they're unconscious.
30:41
Yea. And none of us in terms of humanity can advance because of
30:45
these fucking Neanderthals. But Angela, you represent the Neanderthals of humanity, Like,
30:52
wake up for real, wake the fuck up? You are so old,
30:56
Like how do you not see it? By now? I just I
30:59
can't stand her. I can't stand her either. This is a great place
31:02
to take a break. We need to pay some bills, so we're going
31:04
to run some ads. We will be back on the other side to conclude
31:08
our conversation about ninety day Fiance, the Last Resort. All right, we
31:15
are back to talk about ninety day Fiance, the Last Resort. We're going
31:18
to wrap things up. Is there anything else that comes out of this therapy
31:22
discussion with Angela? Do we think that she's had an epiphany. No,
31:26
because she's got an ulterior motive too with this therapy. She's like, I
31:30
am just saying the right thing, so that way, the therapist don't talk
31:33
to me again. But then the next time she gets in a fight,
31:37
they're going to have another intervention with her again. I'm sure, with the
31:41
same fucking therapist. It's like, well, Angela, we talked about this.
31:45
Anger is a secondary emotion. Don't you remember. No, she doesn't
31:48
remember, she doesn't care, she doesn't care if she's not conscious. The
31:52
lights are off, nobody's whole. Yes. Then we return to Eddenless,
31:59
and of course the night before was the big hot tub slime machine. Liz
32:04
is sick of being talked over. She tried to talk to Ed before they
32:07
went to bed, and he just wasn't hearing it. He was happy and
32:09
celebrating that Angela attacked her. You deserved it, And that was fucking weird.
32:15
And so the next morning she's up. Ed gets up. He looks
32:19
awful. Oh, he looks so terrible in his fucking robe. He totally
32:22
tied one on. He's hanging hard. He comes out. Lizz is on
32:28
the couch. She sits down, and they have a talk and she starts
32:31
to say, again, look, I didn't deserve that. I was just
32:35
trying to tell you that I don't appreciate you cheating because that cheats me out
32:40
of black and then she gets cut off yep again because Ed saying more shit,
32:45
trying to defend himself and defend the whole situation. Well, no,
32:49
no, no, but you're the problem, and keeps deflecting, and she's
32:52
like, I can't get a fucking word in. He's like, no,
32:54
no, no, you can talk, and then they start arguing. He
32:57
keeps talking over her, and then she gets up and she starts crying,
33:02
and that's when I realized she's really in this relationship. That's when it occurred
33:07
to me that she's just not putting it on for the cloud, which is
33:10
so fucking weird. My husband's like, why is this woman crying over big
33:15
Ed? I don't, but she is. And she stalks off and she
33:20
calls her mom. Her mom on the other line sounds like she hates Ed,
33:23
oh for sure, because they break up a million times a month,
33:29
I swear to God, So she's probably always calling her mom. She's always
33:31
a sobbing mess. Yeah, And if I was Lizza's mom, I'd be
33:35
like, why are you with this shlub? Yeah? I mean really,
33:37
can we take like some emotional inventory and ask ourselves why you feel the need
33:43
to be with a literal eminem man? Do you think we could just take
33:46
five minutes and dive into that. I really feel like she's with him because
33:52
she is so deeply insecure herself. I feel like she attaches herself to somebody
33:55
like Ed because if ED can't love her, then maybe her fucked up mind.
34:00
She's like, nobody can love me. That's what I think, because
34:02
there's no other explanation to me as to why you would be with this man.
34:07
She's an alcoholic, well that too. She might have substance abuse problems
34:10
and she wants clout makeup. Sex is good. Apparently No, it isn't.
34:15
Absolutely absolutely not, it is not okay. I can't imagine how he
34:22
would get his little peepee to protrude beyond his belly and like fucking angle it
34:30
into her virginia to make a dent in that ponani. I don't see how
34:35
that is even possible. There's no way they have good fucking sex, no
34:37
way. Did you see her on top of him. Last episode. You
34:40
talked about that already and it just burned into my mind. Listen, I
34:45
can't. He is not a lothario, honey, There's no way that he's.
34:52
Maybe he eats the box. Maybe he can put his whole neck up
34:54
in it, move it around, fucking move it around, find the little
34:59
man in the boat and just move that fucking neck around. Maybe she loves
35:04
it, and I maybe, but I don't. I can't. She's thirty
35:07
years old, I know. Like, get your shit together, ye,
35:10
go to AAA yeah, and stop drinking. You know, you lose the
35:15
alcohol bloat. Yeah, Like, go out and meet people your age who
35:20
aren't almost sixty years old and virtual bowling ball. Go have actual conversations,
35:24
join toastmasters, join a book club, and gage your mindless why are you
35:30
doing this to you and us? I know, for real life, I'm
35:34
like in pain watching her be sad over this guy on this bowling ball of
35:39
a person. I don't understand. She's literally crying, snot coming out of
35:45
her nose, crying on the beach to her mother. I just can't do
35:47
it. He's not taking it seriously. Well, it's fucking big head,
35:52
dude. Yeah, it's a big head. He doesn't think that he has
35:55
anything wrong with himself at all. He thinks he's perfect, well, his
36:00
facade thinks he's perfect. But he's hurting and he has a mirror. As
36:05
we discussed at the top of this episode, he has to be able to
36:08
see himself. He has to see him and then other people and say,
36:13
oh, one of these things is not like the other. It's me.
36:15
Yeah, but I've been bullied a lot. I'm the problem. It's me.
36:20
Well, we've all been bullied in life. Yeah, you know,
36:22
some of us have amassed the emotional and psychological tools necessary to get the fuck
36:27
over it and become productive citizens of the universe, unlike biget. But maybe
36:32
this is his contribution to my life. Maybe he entertains me. Maybe it's
36:36
for the laugh of it all. Maybe that's what he's giving back. Maybe
36:38
that's his sole fucking contract. Wow, that's so deep. Sorry, I've
36:42
been calming down. I just don't know why this young woman who's not ugly
36:45
by the way, she's a pretty girl. Yes, and I don't understand
36:50
why she's with him. Why would you put up with this ship? But
36:52
it makes me think of my own toxic relationships. I have that one toxic
36:58
relationship with the impotent guy. Impotent guy, but he took his viagra,
37:04
and that's a fact I'm just saying. But let's say this impotent guy was
37:08
not somebody that looked like big ed though. No. I mean, he
37:12
was relatively attractive, but do you know how when you're with somebody, yes,
37:15
you can make them seem more attractive in your mind than they actually are
37:22
to everybody else. I think everybody else thought he looked like a broke down
37:25
fawns from Happy Days, and I thought he was just like the most fucking
37:31
handsome deally. Yeah. I thought he was really handsome, I have to
37:35
say. And I was digmatized, and that's for sure. But it was
37:37
so toxic. And we were in this three year relationship and we would break
37:42
up and make up once or twice a month, and it was so fucking
37:45
draw malicious. There was this one time he was supposed to go to AA
37:49
because he was an incorrigible drunk. Yeah, and he was always lying about
37:52
it. He was always fucking sneaking booze. And he had gotten his like
37:55
sixty day metal from AAA, the little Yeah, and so he was showing
38:00
me his chip. I was in his car. We were driving, and
38:02
I went to grab his water because I was thirsty. I drank it was
38:06
pure Voker. Out of the car, I started screaming and losing my mind.
38:13
He took me back to my place. I took my purse and I
38:15
started fucking hitting his accurate integrit or whatever he was driving, and we're just
38:21
we were a spectacle. Oh oh my god, you were like big Ed
38:27
and Liz. And then I went back to him. There was this one
38:30
time we were at a bar and he was jealous because I was so hot
38:34
that he was so jealous. I was talking to somebody. I wasn't doing
38:37
it on purpose, but he got mad and we got into this huge fight
38:39
in front of other people. I threw a drink right in his face.
38:43
Whoa. He stormed off. I had to pay the check. It was
38:45
like always like this. It was always Liz and Ed, except we were
38:52
not listen ed. But you can get sucked into this weird codependent relationship with
39:00
people. Sorry, you can get sucked into this weird codependent relationship with people
39:04
where that becomes the new normal. And then when you don't have the drama
39:07
and the conflict in your life. Then it feels like something's missing. Oh
39:12
did you feel like that after you guys finally broke up and you were done.
39:15
No, dude, I was over him. Really. I was dating
39:16
immediately soon after I met my husband. Really, oh yeah. Day.
39:21
And then he drove by once, probably about five months afterwards, like I
39:23
had, I went no contact. Wow. I didn't block him because I
39:29
don't think you could back then, but like, I went no contact and
39:30
he drove into my Caul de Sac. I had just draw. I just
39:35
came home, I dropped my kid off. I was sitting in my garage
39:37
and man converted bass playing some tunes right, and I heard this fucking metal
39:43
music pull into the Call to Sac and he's like sitting there in his accurate
39:47
integral or whatever. It was just staring at me. That's creepy staring at
39:52
me. And I looked up in my rear view mirror and I'm like,
39:53
is that the fawns? Oh my god? And then he saw me see
39:58
him, and then he peeled out like he wasn't forty. Like, dude,
40:02
you're forty and you're peeling out in an accurate integral. It's lame.
40:07
Wow. Then I told my then boyfriend now husband that this was happening,
40:12
and the next day he took off work and he sat on the porch with
40:14
a gun. Oh my god, big dick energy. I love so much.
40:19
I can't just leave him, just leave him. Liz, Well,
40:23
maybe she's digmatized. Come on, you just said this there. Now,
40:31
I'm like, I see it, now, this is what it is.
40:34
You see it, you can see it. It's she's so addicted to the
40:37
toxicity and maybe his tiny baby band papeine. I don't know. I don't
40:42
know. Maybe she's addicted to that and so she just can't get rid of
40:46
it, and maybe she's likes the drama because it's exciting in her I don't
40:50
understand any of it. So that's all I'm saying. I get being in
40:52
a weird relationship, But like I just at least the person I was with
40:57
had some things going for an An was intelligent, you know what I mean,
41:00
Like there was intelligence that was going well, there there was some at
41:04
a neck. I could see the neck. But I just don't understand.
41:07
And so she's talking to her mom or her mom's like, fucking dump this
41:10
loser. Give him the cold shoulders to talk to his ass. Yeah,
41:15
why do you even care? She marches back in and starts talking to him
41:17
again, And I'm like, why do you call your mom if you're not
41:20
going to listen to her? I mean, but then listening to Liz try
41:23
to talk to Ed like her, she's not able to really communicate her emotions
41:29
in a clear way either. She's just kind of no, all over the
41:31
place. And I'm just like, you're spending way too much energy and time
41:36
with this eminem man, and I don't get it. And Ed's like,
41:38
I will listen. She's like, you better shut the fuck up and listen
41:42
to me, Ed, or else I'm out of here. I am not
41:45
gonna do this therapy would anymore unless you take it thoriously. And Ed just
41:52
says I will take it seriously. No, he won't. It's not gonna
41:57
be taken seriously. Yeah. Three minutes later, he's not taking it fucking
42:01
serious. Yeah, he's cutting her off again. He's not letting your you
42:06
get what you settle for last And if this is how you want to live
42:07
your life, I want to just empower you to like be happy. But
42:10
like y'all suck. You guys suck, and you're bad for each other,
42:14
and this whole show is delightful. I mean, I'm kind of digging it.
42:16
I don't mind it. Actually, it's like it's actually kind of entertaining
42:22
well because you can sit back and go like, my shit's pretty great.
42:24
Like when you look at these people, these absolute dumpster fire train wrecks.
42:28
I can look at my husband and like you are you are catch my friend?
42:32
Yeah, I do that reading Reddit, I'll read all the relationship advice
42:36
subparate too. I do the same thing. I'll stay to my husband.
42:38
I love you so much. Yes, I'm so grateful you're not asking to
42:42
open our marriage and then getting mad at me when I go and bang somebody
42:45
else in our open marriage, and then divorcing me and taking my children.
42:49
Like, I'm so grateful that you're normal, so grateful, and so grateful
42:51
that you never have to worry about cheating because he would never cheat on you
42:54
either. My wife would never cheat on No. It's just so great.
42:57
I'm like, I feel so secure watching all these will make fools of themselves
43:00
on TV, Like when we watch My six hundred pound life and I clearly
43:05
have a weight problem, Like I'm clearly trying to you don't have a weight
43:15
problem at all. Okay, I believe you and clearly trying to fix it.
43:17
But then when I get when I watch My six hundred pound Life,
43:22
I feel like a motherfucking supermodel. It's Heidi Cloom in this bit, Dy
43:25
Gloom in this bit. I just feel gorgeous as they meeting my Kentucky Fried
43:30
chicken. Watching people struggle with their body weight and their self image on TV,
43:36
does that make me a bad person? I don't care. I'm not
43:37
a person. I'm a raccoon. Yeah, We're in the bottom of the
43:40
dumpster together. It's what we do. When is my six hundred pound life
43:44
gonna come back? They're fucking us around. I'm ned that it just ended
43:49
with no nobody talks about it. You know, they're getting sued though.
43:52
Their protection company is getting sued by all those fatties who didn't wait. Why
43:55
And I think they're claiming that they weren't treated well. I don't know,
44:00
serious, I don't know. Because you were told to go on a diet
44:02
to save your life because you're seven hundred and fifty pounds something like that.
44:07
Oh my god. So maybe because of the litigious nature of all of these
44:12
six hundred pound people. Doctor now and his son who produces the show,
44:15
are like, let's pump the brakes than sure, so we have enough contracts
44:20
and NDA so we don't get sued. But I just wanted to come back.
44:22
Me too. I love that show. It's my favorite thing to just
44:24
get a shipload of McDonald's and watch that show and pick out absolutely. And
44:29
I think that's why we watch the Last Resort because we feel better in our
44:31
own relationship totally. And I know I can do better than Liz. If
44:35
I can do anything in life, I can do better than Liz. Me
44:38
too. And on that note, we will be back on Monday slash Tuesday,
44:43
depending on whether you're a patron has my wig to talk about my sister
44:46
wive's closet. I mean, we'll be here to talk about sister wives.
44:51
Yes, I have a lot of shit to say. Next week is the
44:54
big argument, but twitch it god, And next week is when laugh Fille
45:00
premieres. Nay, yes, it's next week, bitch, on Tuesday.
45:06
Bitch, I had like forgotten that. Oh what a beautiful week it'll be.
45:14
It's gonna be so great. So we'll be back on Monday Tuesday to
45:16
talk sister wise with y'all. We'll be back Wednesday Thursday to talk the last
45:22
resort. Yeah, but primarily welcome to Plasville. I hope you guys are
45:25
watching with us so we can all commits the right energetically regarding everything that we're
45:30
watching. Yeah, and thank you guys so much for listening to our bike
45:34
here. Thank you very much, and thank you to all the patrons for
45:36
supporting us. We heart you. And on that note, is there anything
45:40
else that we need to say to these beautiful record of build will Well?
45:45
If you heart us like we heart you, I hope that you give us
45:47
a five star glowing review, five stars nothing less my favorite podcast platform,
45:53
and please like you, subscribe on YouTube and support us on patron. Thank
45:58
you so much an until don peace, All White guys, m