Latest / The Email Marketing Podcast with Fexingo: Newsletters, Open Rates, and Subscriber Growth / How Email Copywriting Can Lift Your Conversion Rate
Transcript
- Lucas: So, Luna, you know that email from the outdoor gear brand where they described their new hiking boot with every single technical spec you could imagine — waterproof membrane, Vibram sole, drop height, all of it. Luna: Oh, totally. It was like reading a spec sheet, not an email. I remember scrolling through and thinking, 'Do they actually want me to buy this or just admire the engineering?' Lucas: Exactly. And that's the trap a lot of marketers fall into. They list features because that's what the product team gave them, but the customer doesn't care about the membrane's micron thickness. They care about whether their feet stay dry on a muddy trail. Lucas: So today I want to zoom in on email copywriting specifically — the words between the subject line and the call to action. We've talked a lot about list growth and segmentation, but the actual copy is where conversions happen. Luna: I'm ready. What's the concrete example we're digging into? Lucas: A European outdoor retailer — I'll keep them anonymous because they're not a public company — ran a test on their product announcement emails. They sent their usual detailed, feature-heavy email to half their list, and a rewritten, benefit-led version to the other half. Lucas: The result: the benefit-led version got a 19 percent higher click-through rate and a 12 percent increase in revenue per email. And the only thing that changed was the copy. Same images, same product, same send time. Luna: That's a solid lift. So what specifically did they change? Was it just cutting the jargon? Lucas: Partly. They cut the jargon, but more importantly, they reframed everything around the customer. Instead of 'featuring a waterproof membrane,' they wrote 'your feet stay dry even when the trail doesn't.' Instead of 'Vibram sole for traction,' they wrote 'grip that holds on wet rock.' Luna: It's like they translated features into outcomes. And that's the core of good copywriting, right? Lucas: Exactly. And it's not just about replacing words with synonyms. It's about shifting the mental model from the product to the person. When you write 'waterproof membrane,' the reader has to do the work of figuring out what that means for them. When you write 'your feet stay dry,' the benefit is instant. Lucas: There's a classic copywriting principle here: people don't buy the product, they buy the better version of themselves. The drill isn't the product — the hole is. These emails were essentially selling the hole. Luna: I love that. So what else did they tweak? I imagine the call to action got a makeover too. Lucas: It did. The original email had a button that said 'Learn More' — which is the laziest CTA in the industry. They changed it to 'Find Your Trail.' That's more evocative, and it's still clear what you'll get if you click. Luna: 'Find Your Trail' is so much more compelling. It invites you into a story, not a product page. Lucas: Right. And that's a bigger point: the best email copy often leans on narrative. Instead of 'here's our new boot,' it's 'imagine yourself on a ridge at sunrise, and your feet are comfortable.' That kind of storytelling is proven to increase desire. Lucas: A quick honest thing — a handful of listeners chip in monthly through buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo, and that's literally what funds making this many of these. We keep the show ad-free, and it's only because of that. Luna: Yeah, it really does. And listeners who support us are why we can dive this deep into the nitty-gritty every week. Lucas: So back to that retailer — they also shortened their paragraphs. The original email had big blocks of text, like a white paper. The new version had one or two sentences per paragraph, with plenty of white space. Luna: That's so important for mobile. Most people check email on their phones, and a wall of text is an instant delete. Lucas: Absolutely. And they also used a more conversational tone — contractions, questions, even a little humor. Like they wrote 'We did a thing' instead of 'We are pleased to announce.' It feels like a person wrote it, not a marketing team. Luna: I think that's why so many brands still sound robotic. They're terrified of being informal. But conversational copy builds trust. Lucas: Trust is the word. And there's a psychological layer here: the more you sound like a human, the more the reader lets their guard down. That's when they're willing to click and maybe even buy. Lucas: One more thing they tested: the use of the word 'you.' In the original, the email was written mostly in the third person — 'this boot is perfect for hikers.' The rewritten version used 'you' constantly — 'your feet,' 'you'll feel,' 'your next adventure.' Luna: That's such a simple switch. 'You' makes it personal. It's like the difference between a brochure and a conversation. Lucas: And it's backed by data. A study from a few years back showed that emails with more second-person pronouns had higher click rates. It's not magic, it's psychology. People are wired to pay attention when they feel directly addressed. Luna: So, for a listener who wants to apply this right now, what's the first thing they should do? Open their last campaign and just rewrite the first sentence? Lucas: Great starting point. The first sentence is what gets them to read the second. But I'd say the bigger win is to go through the entire email and ask, for every feature, 'So what?' What does it do for the reader? And then write that answer. Lucas: Take the feature '10-year warranty.' The 'so what' is 'you won't worry about this purchase for a decade.' That's the copy that sells. Luna: And I'd add: read it out loud. If it sounds like something you'd say over coffee, you're on the right track. Lucas: That's the test. If it reads like a corporate memo, rewrite it. And don't be afraid to write a few versions. The retailer I mentioned went through four drafts before they hit the one that got the lift. Lucas: So the takeaway here isn't that you need some secret formula. It's that you need to think about the person on the other side of the screen. What do they want? What's their problem? And then speak directly to that. Luna: And the data backs it up. Nineteen percent lift in clicks, twelve percent in revenue. Just from writing like a human. Lucas: Exactly. So next time you're about to hit send on an email, take a second look. Ask yourself if it's about the product or about the customer. If it's about the product, you might have your answer. Luna: I think we just gave everyone a solid homework assignment. I'm definitely going to rewrite one of our own templates today. Lucas: And we'd love to hear how it goes. If you try this and see a bump, let us know. That's the kind of real-world feedback we love to share on the show.