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How can I find the courage to walk away from a relationship? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_00: Finding the courage to walk away from a relationship is one of the hardest things a person can do, and if it feels impossible right now, that makes sense.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: As leaving is rarely just one clean moment, as it's usually a process, slowed down by self-doubt, attachment, and fear of what comes next.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: And wanting to leave and still feeling stuck at the same time doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: Now when the fear or guilt feels too loud, just pause and take a slow breath in for four counts, hold for four and exale for six.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: Right now the goal is simply calming your body enough to think clearly, nothing more than that.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: And if you'd like, you can also place the hand on your chest and quietly just say to yourself that this is hard and I'm allowed to fight it hard.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Now one thing that keeps people stuck is believing they need to feel completely certain before the act.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need certainty to take a step.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: So notice when your mind jumps to thoughts like who else would want me or maybe I'm overreacting, and gently just ask yourself, Well, would I say this to a friend in my situation?
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: You can either write your thoughts down, even messily, can help you see the relationship more clearly and can separate from that guilt or the good memories that keeps pulling you back.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: Now, practical ways to support yourself with this is really connecting with one person outside the relationship, such as a friend or a family member that you might have drifted from, as isolation makes leaving harder, so rebuilding those connections matters.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: You can also think about the practical details as well, like where you'd stay, what you'd need to take, and who you can tell.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: And you don't have to tell everyone straight away, but you can start with one person that you do trust.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if at any point you are feeling maybe controlled, threatened, or unsafe in any way, or perhaps just needing someone to talk to about what you're experiencing, then a counsellor who specialises in relationships can help you make sense of what's happening and support you with practical safety planning and emotional processing.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: Now in the app you can find further support about finding the courage to walk away.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: If you are thinking about harming yourself or feeling safe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency number or a crisis helpline.