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The Reset You Actually Need - Day 10. Choosing Peace is the Power Move · Do You F*cking Mind?

0:11
Speaker 1: Hello, my beautiful beans, and welcome to the last episode
0:14
Speaker 1: of the miniseriies. This is episode ten. I can't believe
0:17
Speaker 1: we're here. We are finally here, and the episode is
0:21
Speaker 1: Choosing Peace is the Power Move. So, as you guys
0:24
Speaker 1: have probably gathered, I've done a lot of miniseries upon well,
0:28
Speaker 1: I don't know about a lot, but I've done quite
0:30
Speaker 1: a few miniseriies within the DYFM history, the last over
0:35
Speaker 1: the last five six years. However long. This podcast has
0:38
Speaker 1: been going on for nearly six years, which is hectic
0:40
Speaker 1: to say, and often when I talk about you know, drive,
0:45
Speaker 1: motivation starting the year, it's very much gearing you up
0:49
Speaker 1: for big change, you know, big action that all of
0:52
Speaker 1: the above, and I still am really big on that.
0:55
Speaker 1: I'm really big on making big changes in your life,
0:59
Speaker 1: setting the bar as high as you want to set it,
1:01
Speaker 1: have those big goals, knowing how you can apply the
1:04
Speaker 1: things in your life to achieve those big goals. But
1:06
Speaker 1: as you've probably gathered, this mini series has still been
1:10
Speaker 1: about that, but more so from the lens of creating
1:13
Speaker 1: that balance and peace and happiness in your life. The
1:18
Speaker 1: reason I've done that is because that's very much kind
1:20
Speaker 1: of where my head is at for this year. My
1:22
Speaker 1: number one priority, as lame as it sounds, it's not lame,
1:25
Speaker 1: but it's like simple as it sounds, is just to
1:28
Speaker 1: feel good. Right. I want to wake up feeling relaxed
1:30
Speaker 1: and calm. I want to go to bed feeling relaxed
1:32
Speaker 1: and calm. I think that my work reflects that when
1:36
Speaker 1: I'm calmer and relaxed. I think it makes me a
1:38
Speaker 1: much better mother when I'm happy, relaxed and calm, and
1:41
Speaker 1: not even I think I know for a fact the
1:43
Speaker 1: way I interact with my babies when I'm relaxed and
1:46
Speaker 1: calm is a thousand times better than if I'm flustered
1:50
Speaker 1: and stressed and whatever, even just in the eye contact
1:53
Speaker 1: and all of that. I'm not even going to go
1:54
Speaker 1: into that. That's like a whole parenting podcast to talk about.
1:56
Speaker 1: But what I'm saying is that I know that I'm
1:58
Speaker 1: a better person to myself, to my work, to my family,
2:02
Speaker 1: to my partner, to my friends when I feel good
2:06
Speaker 1: and calm. So what can I be doing to make
2:09
Speaker 1: that happen? Because that doesn't just happen miraculously. You've got
2:12
Speaker 1: to put things into place in order to feel this way.
2:15
Speaker 1: And we've got a lot of these like deep seated
2:17
Speaker 1: patterns that we've got that for some people, especially more
2:21
Speaker 1: so than others, makes that pretty hard to achieve. So
2:24
Speaker 1: the point of this miniseries was to give people the
2:27
Speaker 1: tools to try and put into practice these little behaviors,
2:31
Speaker 1: these little changes that will make you see a difference.
2:34
Speaker 1: It might not be a huge difference overnight, but if
2:36
Speaker 1: you do it consistently, you're going to start to feel
2:38
Speaker 1: a lot calmer. You're going to start to feel more
2:41
Speaker 1: at peace, more focused, more on purpose, and sometimes slowing
2:46
Speaker 1: down is the way to do that. Sometimes slowing down
2:49
Speaker 1: actually gets you ultimately to where you wanted to go.
2:52
Speaker 1: It actually gets you closer to those external goals that
2:54
Speaker 1: you wanted to achieve, but also a lot closer to
2:57
Speaker 1: those internal, more emotional goals that you wanted to achieve
2:59
Speaker 1: as well. And also relationship goes too. So I think
3:04
Speaker 1: for the final episode, I wanted to talk about how
3:07
Speaker 1: choosing peace is kind of going to be your power
3:09
Speaker 1: move for this year, and yeah, if you guys are
3:12
Speaker 1: on board, write it in the comments because I love
3:14
Speaker 1: the comments so much. Because yeah, so there are a
3:17
Speaker 1: few points that I've jotted down in my little burn
3:20
Speaker 1: storm document that I would like to talk about. Okay,
3:23
Speaker 1: so the first one is hustle culture. Hustle hustle culture
3:29
Speaker 1: confuses motion like action action action, action with progress. Okay,
3:34
Speaker 1: I'm all about you know, your actions speak louder than words.
3:38
Speaker 1: You have to be taking action in order to start
3:40
Speaker 1: tweaking and learning and getting feedback and doing things. Action
3:43
Speaker 1: is everything, right, but not all action is necessary. Sometimes
3:49
Speaker 1: we it's this glorification of being busy, which we all
3:52
Speaker 1: know about. You know, if you are someone or how
3:54
Speaker 1: are you busy? I'm busy. Everyone's like, who's competing on
3:56
Speaker 1: who's busy? And you know when people compete. Oh, I
3:58
Speaker 1: didn't know busy until I became apparent. I no busy
4:00
Speaker 1: to tell this, I didn't know what. It's like a
4:03
Speaker 1: flex the busier. You are right, but it creates this busy,
4:09
Speaker 1: busy busy busy busy can for a lot of people
4:11
Speaker 1: create this feeling of ambition without actually having the results.
4:15
Speaker 1: Sometimes we think, well, I'm really busy, so I must
4:17
Speaker 1: be doing the right thing. Well, my timetable's packed out,
4:20
Speaker 1: so I must be doing the right thing. Well from
4:22
Speaker 1: nine to five I was like absolutely inundated, So I
4:25
Speaker 1: must be doing the right thing, and that's not always
4:27
Speaker 1: the case. It's actually a lot of the time it's
4:29
Speaker 1: not the case. Okay, This constant urgency is really eroding
4:36
Speaker 1: at our ability to really think strategically and to prioritize
4:40
Speaker 1: things properly. Everything these days is urgent. Every email is
4:44
Speaker 1: much urgent. Get this done urgently? Urgently? Urgent that you
4:46
Speaker 1: do you fucking know what urgent means? Do you know
4:49
Speaker 1: what urgent means? Next time someone sends you an email
4:51
Speaker 1: saying urgent and it's actually not urgent, just replies saying,
4:55
Speaker 1: do you know the definition of the word urgent? Cheers? Kind,
4:57
Speaker 1: have a nice day? Okay, ridiculous. If it's actually urgent,
5:02
Speaker 1: then nothing. If everything is urgent, then nothing is urgent.
5:05
Speaker 1: If that makes sense. The point of the word is
5:07
Speaker 1: to pull that one thing out and put it right
5:10
Speaker 1: at the top of the list. It should only be
5:12
Speaker 1: used in an actual like if it's anyway whatever, I'm
5:17
Speaker 1: going on a tangent. So knowing that, I think it's
5:22
Speaker 1: really important to think, Okay, how much of what I'm
5:24
Speaker 1: doing is actually really necessary for the important things in
5:28
Speaker 1: my life. There are certain things that I've got to
5:30
Speaker 1: tick off, and only very few of them are actually urgent,
5:34
Speaker 1: and some of them are things that you know I
5:36
Speaker 1: will get to as long as I'm doing it consistently,
5:38
Speaker 1: I will get to it. As long as I'm not
5:40
Speaker 1: procrastinating on these things work wise or house admin wise,
5:44
Speaker 1: then I'm going to get to it. So, for example,
5:46
Speaker 1: what I've spoken about a thousand times is allocating maybe
5:49
Speaker 1: thirty minutes a day to life admint tasks or fifteen
5:52
Speaker 1: minutes or whatever you can do to life admin tasks,
5:55
Speaker 1: versus thinking, oh my god, I've got to get all
5:57
Speaker 1: this shit done, but it's insurmountable. Maybe I'll all do
5:59
Speaker 1: it on Friday' block half the day and then and
6:01
Speaker 1: then it's quite urgent. And then here you are busy,
6:03
Speaker 1: busy's busy, but not actually getting that much work done
6:06
Speaker 1: because you've flustered and you're scattered. Okay, so it's not
6:10
Speaker 1: about not doing anything in your life and just relaxing.
6:13
Speaker 1: And you know, I'm not buying in to husle culture.
6:16
Speaker 1: And you've still got to get shit done. But how
6:17
Speaker 1: are we approaching it and how much of the stuff
6:21
Speaker 1: that we are doing is actually super necessary? Right now
6:25
Speaker 1: towards the things that are important for us long term.
6:29
Speaker 1: And when I talk about important, I'm not just talking
6:31
Speaker 1: about things that are going to make you money. You've
6:33
Speaker 1: got to think of what is important and why am
6:36
Speaker 1: I labeling it as important. So this is a really
6:39
Speaker 1: good way for you to determine what's important, especially from
6:41
Speaker 1: a personal standpoint. You've got a number one. Ask yourself,
6:44
Speaker 1: who do I want to be today? I want to
6:46
Speaker 1: be a calm person. I want to feel good. I
6:49
Speaker 1: know that when I feel calm and relaxed, I'm more focused.
6:52
Speaker 1: I actually am more productive at work. But I'm also
6:55
Speaker 1: a lot more fun. I joke, my humor is actually better.
7:00
Speaker 1: Like I have good banter, and then because of the
7:03
Speaker 1: good banter, it really lifts my mood and then I'm lighthearted,
7:06
Speaker 1: and then I can do other things, and then I
7:07
Speaker 1: actually want to clean the house because I've got this
7:09
Speaker 1: search of energy and okay, cool, So that's what I want.
7:12
Speaker 1: What are the things that contribute to make me feel
7:14
Speaker 1: this way? I know that for a fact, no matter what,
7:16
Speaker 1: if I get outside and go for a nice walk,
7:19
Speaker 1: maybe with a friend that already starts my day off
7:22
Speaker 1: on the highest note possible, it's exactly what I need
7:24
Speaker 1: or father people that's like, nah, I go for a swim.
7:26
Speaker 1: I know that every time I go for a swim,
7:28
Speaker 1: which I'm like, I don't get in and get to
7:29
Speaker 1: the pull that often, but when I do, you transfer. Okay,
7:33
Speaker 1: that's important. That's what I mean by important. If there
7:36
Speaker 1: is something that you can do for yourself that equals
7:39
Speaker 1: you improving your state, your mood, your focus, your humor,
7:43
Speaker 1: your connection with other people, you do that thing. Some
7:46
Speaker 1: people might say, oh, well, you know, I've got so
7:49
Speaker 1: much on my list. I'm so busy that I can't
7:52
Speaker 1: do that swim, or I can't do that walk with
7:54
Speaker 1: my friends, or I can't do that ten minutes of
7:57
Speaker 1: reading on my balcony or like everyone, everyone keep in
8:00
Speaker 1: mind that this is scalable to your lifestyle. I am
8:04
Speaker 1: sure that there are some people with you know, a
8:06
Speaker 1: thousand children in their household and there's just they can't
8:08
Speaker 1: be going for that casual swim in the morning. I
8:10
Speaker 1: understand that, But I'm talking about scale it to your lifestyle.
8:14
Speaker 1: What is that thing that you know that you can
8:15
Speaker 1: do for sure that changes your mental state for the day,
8:22
Speaker 1: and that is the important task. Don't think, oh, well,
8:25
Speaker 1: because there's no deadline. Because there's no looming deadline, I
8:30
Speaker 1: don't actually have to do that swim. I could be
8:32
Speaker 1: doing other shit. No, that backfire. So I'm using the
8:36
Speaker 1: swim as the example because I really want to go
8:38
Speaker 1: for a swim this afternoon. But let's hope that up. No,
8:40
Speaker 1: fuck hope, fuck fuck hope. I'm going for a swim
8:43
Speaker 1: this afternoon. And if you're watching my stories, I'm going, Okay,
8:47
Speaker 1: how's been going on a tangent? Anyway? The point that
8:49
Speaker 1: I'm trying to make is that when you don't do
8:53
Speaker 1: that thing, you think you're saving time, but in reality,
8:56
Speaker 1: you're not saving time because what ends up happening is
8:59
Speaker 1: that you are I've got more head noise, You're probably
9:02
Speaker 1: more irritable. Things take a bit longer, You're more likely
9:05
Speaker 1: to just want to be on your phone. You're more
9:06
Speaker 1: likely to want to pacify and distract because you're a
9:09
Speaker 1: bit flustered. Then you get caught up in those smaller tasks.
9:12
Speaker 1: Then you don't have that free time because it took
9:14
Speaker 1: you longer to do the smaller tasks than you actually
9:16
Speaker 1: would like to socialize. But then you find that when
9:18
Speaker 1: you're talking to your friends, you feel a bit flat
9:20
Speaker 1: because you think it for all the task you got
9:21
Speaker 1: to do it, So then it actually is counterproductive because
9:24
Speaker 1: you think I saved time by not doing that thing
9:27
Speaker 1: in the morning that I would have loved to do
9:28
Speaker 1: but I didn't. But then it's actually stretched out how
9:31
Speaker 1: long it takes me to do all my other shit
9:33
Speaker 1: in the day right because my head's just not in
9:35
Speaker 1: the game. I don't feel great. So that swim is important.
9:40
Speaker 1: It's way more important than you think anything that's going
9:43
Speaker 1: to set the time for the day, that's going to
9:44
Speaker 1: set the time for the week, or for your head
9:46
Speaker 1: or for whatever. It doesn't matter when in the day
9:48
Speaker 1: you do. It is important. It's actually the most important
9:52
Speaker 1: thing you do because it determines how you show up
9:55
Speaker 1: for your relationships, your relationship with yourself, with other people,
9:58
Speaker 1: with your career, with everything. Okay, so this is crucial.
10:02
Speaker 1: That is what I mean by important. Determine what that
10:06
Speaker 1: is and put that on the vet. That's urgent. You
10:08
Speaker 1: reply to that email from your BOS saying, you know,
10:10
Speaker 1: what's fucking urgent? Me being in a pool right now?
10:12
Speaker 1: That's urgent. Send okay, and no exclamation marks. That's another
10:16
Speaker 1: thing this year. This is the year, especially for women,
10:19
Speaker 1: to stop using exclamation marks. The amount of times that
10:22
Speaker 1: have noticed that I use exclamation marks in my email
10:24
Speaker 1: because I want to come across as friendly. Less of that,
10:26
Speaker 1: less of that, Delete exclamation mark and send the email.
10:31
Speaker 1: Next sense. Peace of mind increases performance, not complacency. Okay,
10:42
Speaker 1: So pretty much like I just said, I went under
10:44
Speaker 1: tangent and this is my next point. But like I said,
10:46
Speaker 1: when you've got a regulated, calm brain, you think more
10:49
Speaker 1: long term. Your decisions are way clearer, way clearer, and
10:54
Speaker 1: you're able to make that decision a lot faster. You
10:56
Speaker 1: can choose your outfit a lot faster. You can choose
10:59
Speaker 1: what you're going to eat of the menu a lot faster.
11:01
Speaker 1: You can choose the order of things that you need
11:03
Speaker 1: to do today and how they're going to play out
11:05
Speaker 1: a lot faster. Okay, your follow through is a lot better.
11:09
Speaker 1: You say, okay, I'm just going to clean this kitchen.
11:10
Speaker 1: You don't get caught up in between tasks whatever. You
11:13
Speaker 1: get it fucking done. And then you sit down, you
11:14
Speaker 1: say I'm going to spend thirty minutes doing this reference
11:17
Speaker 1: list for my essay. You actually end up doing it
11:19
Speaker 1: because you've got clarity you're calm, you're regulated. Okay, your
11:23
Speaker 1: goals are more simple, but you stick to them, and
11:28
Speaker 1: then it's easier to make them harder and harder and harder.
11:31
Speaker 1: But it doesn't feel like it's that insurmountable because you
11:34
Speaker 1: follow through, because you stick to them, it becomes just
11:37
Speaker 1: part of your nature and then you can add more
11:39
Speaker 1: and more and more without it feeling like you're putting
11:41
Speaker 1: too much on your plate. Okay, So this kind of
11:43
Speaker 1: stability is actually extremely productive and the opposite of boring.
11:49
Speaker 1: Number three. Balance isn't a compromise, Okay, it is a strategy. Okay.
11:56
Speaker 1: So people think that, oh, balance, balance, Balance means doing life. Yes,
12:00
Speaker 1: if I want to find balance, it means that I've
12:02
Speaker 1: got to like pick and choose and do less of
12:03
Speaker 1: this and do less of this. But it's actually becoming
12:06
Speaker 1: more strategic with how you do things in your day,
12:08
Speaker 1: with where you're investing your time and energy, with how
12:11
Speaker 1: you're setting yourself up to feel good. Okay. So it's
12:16
Speaker 1: doing the right things consistently and that's going to cause
12:19
Speaker 1: you not to burn out, to feel good and to
12:21
Speaker 1: stay on task and to not get caught up on
12:23
Speaker 1: the stupid shit that we always get caught up in
12:26
Speaker 1: and then we call ourselves busy all the time. Okay,
12:29
Speaker 1: this sustainable effort is always going to trump these huge
12:33
Speaker 1: bouts of like intense hustling and like burnout cycles where
12:37
Speaker 1: you're like working like a dog all week and then
12:40
Speaker 1: you need multiple days off because you're like, oh, I
12:42
Speaker 1: can't think, and then aha, and then again working like
12:45
Speaker 1: a dog, and then you're doing all these pacifying behaviors.
12:47
Speaker 1: Like I spoke about two episodes ago, which I'm not
12:49
Speaker 1: going to get into again because I've got a whole
12:51
Speaker 1: episode on it. The reason that we feel like we're
12:53
Speaker 1: doing too much is because we haven't been consistent and
12:57
Speaker 1: so our plate gets really full and then we've got
12:59
Speaker 1: it like we're always play and catch up. That's why
13:01
Speaker 1: it feels like we're hustling and we're doing too much,
13:02
Speaker 1: because we're always chasing our tail. Okay, the moment you
13:06
Speaker 1: can start to regulate, you're gonna start to feel a
13:09
Speaker 1: whole lot better. All right, If you're always in this
13:11
Speaker 1: position of thinking I'm here now, but I shouldn't be
13:15
Speaker 1: here now, I should be here and that gap, that
13:17
Speaker 1: gap is called anxiety, that gap between where you are
13:20
Speaker 1: and when you think you should be. Stop thinking I
13:22
Speaker 1: should be there, saw, I should be here right now,
13:24
Speaker 1: because this is the only thing I've ever going to experience,
13:26
Speaker 1: which is today, the here, the now. So what am
13:29
Speaker 1: I going to do to make me feel good now?
13:32
Speaker 1: And then? If I feel good now, I'm more likely
13:35
Speaker 1: to put the right things in place to start feeling
13:38
Speaker 1: good tomorrow, next week, next month, next year. And the
13:41
Speaker 1: aim isn't to feel good twenty four hours a day,
13:43
Speaker 1: seven days a week. The aim is to overall feel better.
13:46
Speaker 1: You're gonna have your downs, You're gonna have your stressful moments,
13:48
Speaker 1: You're gonna have people kiss you off, you are gonna
13:50
Speaker 1: be irritable. There's not gonna be times when you don't
13:52
Speaker 1: sleep and whatever. But we're talking about overall, overall well being,
13:56
Speaker 1: your mental well being. That's what we're talking about here. Okay,
14:00
Speaker 1: We're trying to eliminate that gap between where I am
14:03
Speaker 1: and where I think I need to be. It's this,
14:06
Speaker 1: I'm already putting these changes in place. It is sustainable.
14:09
Speaker 1: I'm really happy where I am and I'm happy with
14:11
Speaker 1: my journey. It's not saying that I don't want to change.
14:14
Speaker 1: You can be really happy where you are while still
14:16
Speaker 1: wanting change, and the way you do that is by
14:19
Speaker 1: enjoying the progress and the consistency and the journey that
14:23
Speaker 1: you're on to get there. There's many things that I
14:25
Speaker 1: want to do in my life. But when i have
14:27
Speaker 1: a really good day where I've been good to myself
14:29
Speaker 1: and I've done that important thing, whatever that important thing is,
14:32
Speaker 1: and I've done that thing for me and I feel
14:35
Speaker 1: really connected and I've had some great interactions that day,
14:38
Speaker 1: I go to bed being like, oh, that was a
14:40
Speaker 1: good day. That was a fucking good day. And there's
14:43
Speaker 1: still shit that I haven't done. There's still stuff that
14:45
Speaker 1: I want to achieve, there's still goals that I haven't
14:47
Speaker 1: here yet. But I'm not thinking I should be there.
14:49
Speaker 1: I don't think I should be there. I think i'm
14:51
Speaker 1: working towards it. I feel good this is where I
14:53
Speaker 1: should be right and I'm working towards that thing. And
14:55
Speaker 1: because I'm consistent, because I'm chipping away at it, because
14:59
Speaker 1: it's it's this daily little contribution to that growth, I
15:03
Speaker 1: feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be if I
15:06
Speaker 1: wasn't doing anything, and I'm constantly doing shit for other
15:08
Speaker 1: people and I'm constantly inundating with tusks, and it feels
15:10
Speaker 1: like I'm always chasing my tail. Of course I'm going
15:12
Speaker 1: to feel anxious. Of course I'm going to feel like
15:13
Speaker 1: this is where I shouldn't because I'm not seeing progress
15:15
Speaker 1: and the things that matter to me. I'm not saying balance.
15:18
Speaker 1: I'm not calm. I'm flustered, I'm irritable, I'm pissed off. Okay,
15:22
Speaker 1: that's the difference. So you have all the goals you want,
15:26
Speaker 1: have all the growth goals you want, have all these
15:28
Speaker 1: things that you want. You can have that and still
15:30
Speaker 1: be really happy where you are at. And that comes
15:32
Speaker 1: from that important thing that you're doing for yourself to
15:35
Speaker 1: have that balance, and it comes from having that consistency
15:38
Speaker 1: where you're seeing that steady growth and you're like, I
15:40
Speaker 1: like the pace at which I'm growing and learning and
15:42
Speaker 1: doing all these things. Okay, now number four. The happiest
15:46
Speaker 1: people I did run and most successful, but not always
15:50
Speaker 1: the case. Sometimes really successful people it's not the case.
15:54
Speaker 1: But definitely the happiest people are not over stimulated. Okay,
15:59
Speaker 1: this overstimulation and I'm sorry to always be bringing up phones,
16:04
Speaker 1: but it's just something that I'm going to bang on
16:05
Speaker 1: about forever because I'm really trying to help you improve
16:08
Speaker 1: your relationship with yourself. But this constant consumption of stuff
16:13
Speaker 1: all the time, physical and digital all the time, is
16:17
Speaker 1: training our brain to always be seeking novelty, novelty new.
16:22
Speaker 1: There's people that have Amazon orders rocking up at their
16:25
Speaker 1: door every fucking day. You don't need that. You need
16:28
Speaker 1: to stop, is what you need to do. Okay. This
16:31
Speaker 1: is your brain constantly seeking novelty instead of meaning something
16:37
Speaker 1: with with with weight, something with substance. Okay. And over
16:43
Speaker 1: stimulation absolutely kills your creativity, It kills your satisfaction. It's
16:48
Speaker 1: always leaving you wanting more, wanting more, wanting more. You're
16:51
Speaker 1: an addict, babe, You're a fucking addict. Okay, so everyone,
16:54
Speaker 1: we're borderline. Most of us are addicts when it comes
16:57
Speaker 1: to this over stimulation where we're constantly stimulated, stimulated. Then
17:01
Speaker 1: when we're not stimulated, we think like, I'm bored. I'm
17:04
Speaker 1: bored now, I'm bored because we don't know how to
17:05
Speaker 1: be alone with our thoughts. We don't know how to
17:08
Speaker 1: just sit there and just brainstorm and be creative. You'll
17:11
Speaker 1: be amazed if you allowed. You know those people that
17:12
Speaker 1: say I'm raw dogging bored and whatever. Do you know
17:15
Speaker 1: how fucking good that is to do. It's actually good
17:17
Speaker 1: to raw dog boredom. You said, thirty minute timer. But
17:20
Speaker 1: one week in you'll be like, holy shit, the amount
17:23
Speaker 1: of ideas I came up with in those thirty minutes.
17:25
Speaker 1: The first day you're gonna be like, oh my god,
17:27
Speaker 1: I'm hating life. Suffer, suffer, suff I'm torturing myself. Oh
17:30
Speaker 1: my god, I'm a victim to my own circumstances. And
17:33
Speaker 1: then by day seven or maybe day ten, depending how
17:36
Speaker 1: much you're hating this thirty minute thing, you'll be like,
17:39
Speaker 1: in those thirty minutes, I came up with all these ideas.
17:41
Speaker 1: I came up with creative ideas. I've remembered really funny stories.
17:44
Speaker 1: I was actually quite entertained for those thirty minutes. I
17:46
Speaker 1: could do that longer. Okay, that's what happens when you
17:49
Speaker 1: start to train your brain to slow the fuck down
17:52
Speaker 1: and to search for meaning, and then you get creative.
17:55
Speaker 1: You start using areas of the brain that you're not
17:57
Speaker 1: used to using. Okay, film is going to grow in
18:01
Speaker 1: these quiet, uninterrupted spaces in our day, so you need
18:05
Speaker 1: more of that and you need to ask yourself, what
18:08
Speaker 1: is this constant consumption actually giving me? What did that
18:11
Speaker 1: Amazon order that I got ten days in a row
18:15
Speaker 1: two years ago actually contribute to my life? And I'm
18:17
Speaker 1: not saying don't ever buy anything. I'm saying balance. I'm saying,
18:22
Speaker 1: buy something, but maybe not so often so you can
18:24
Speaker 1: actually enjoy that thing instead of buying it getting the joy.
18:28
Speaker 1: And then the next day you've got some new shit
18:29
Speaker 1: coming on and then you forgot about you brought a
18:31
Speaker 1: week ago. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I
18:33
Speaker 1: mean with balance. It's not about you have to compromise.
18:35
Speaker 1: It's about what's important to me, and let's focus on
18:38
Speaker 1: those things. And where am I over consuming? Where? Even digitally?
18:43
Speaker 1: Where am I spending all this time being so overstimulated
18:47
Speaker 1: online on my phone? And then I realized the wait
18:49
Speaker 1: a minute, I've not given my midself an opportunity to
18:52
Speaker 1: be creative and have all these great ideas and feel
18:54
Speaker 1: good about myself because I'm like my mind is being
18:57
Speaker 1: borrowed to watch all the time. Okay, Number five, slowing
19:03
Speaker 1: down how you consume content is going to change how
19:06
Speaker 1: you think. Okay, So make this year the year of
19:11
Speaker 1: kind of slower content and less short form content. I'm
19:16
Speaker 1: not saying don't do short form content. I'm saying balance.
19:19
Speaker 1: I'm saying have some time with short form content, because
19:22
Speaker 1: that's just the reality is. We love a real we
19:26
Speaker 1: love you know. But short form content is going to
19:29
Speaker 1: encourage comparison, sharlow, engagement, and reactivity, whereas if you're thinking
19:36
Speaker 1: long form content, which is reading audio, so podcasts, writing,
19:42
Speaker 1: this is going to encourage integration, independent thought, and a
19:46
Speaker 1: lot of reflection as well and creativity of course. So
19:51
Speaker 1: remember the era of the blog. I think the blog
19:53
Speaker 1: is coming back. I'm starting a blog, by the way,
19:55
Speaker 1: I said I was going to do this at the
19:56
Speaker 1: start of the miniseries, but I've just been focusing on
19:59
Speaker 1: this miniseries. But I am going to be starting a
20:01
Speaker 1: blog heavily based on the podcast. So if you just
20:03
Speaker 1: want to listen to the podcast stuff, that's fine, but
20:06
Speaker 1: the blog post will kind of be a reflection of
20:08
Speaker 1: the podcast and similar content. But I kind of think
20:13
Speaker 1: that there's going to be a resurgence of the blog
20:15
Speaker 1: because I think there's a big shift away from this
20:18
Speaker 1: short form content where people are seeking a bit more
20:20
Speaker 1: meaning back to long form content. That's my prediction. That's like,
20:24
Speaker 1: I've got high hopes for society and for you know,
20:28
Speaker 1: I was going to say millennials and Gen Z, but
20:30
Speaker 1: I think every for every generation, to be honest. But
20:34
Speaker 1: what I want you to refer and the reason I'm
20:36
Speaker 1: saying this is because the input is going to shape
20:39
Speaker 1: your mind. You're inner life, your belief systems, you're the
20:42
Speaker 1: inner workings of your mind what you put in. So
20:46
Speaker 1: you've got to look at that as one of the
20:48
Speaker 1: most valuable tools in your toolbox. Shed what if you
20:51
Speaker 1: want to call it, If you had a ferrari, for example,
20:55
Speaker 1: would you put the shittest, cheapest fuel or would you
20:57
Speaker 1: be putting the premium fuel into that ferrari? I would
21:00
Speaker 1: imagine premium. If you were an athlete, like some what
21:04
Speaker 1: you picked the sport, some hectic athlete where your body
21:06
Speaker 1: has to be like fucking on point. Would you be
21:10
Speaker 1: eating shit or not eating enough and then expecting a
21:15
Speaker 1: gold medal performance, or would you be having like the best,
21:18
Speaker 1: fucking the best balanced diet with the richest nutrients and
21:22
Speaker 1: all the shit that you needed to fuel your body properly.
21:24
Speaker 1: You wouldn't be trying to go into a deficit, you
21:26
Speaker 1: would be making sure you're hitting those goals, right, So
21:29
Speaker 1: you've got to think the input determines the output. It's
21:32
Speaker 1: as simple as that. It's what you're putting into your brain.
21:34
Speaker 1: And I'm not just talking about food, although food is
21:36
Speaker 1: very important as well, and water fucking hydrate your brain
21:39
Speaker 1: guys with some electrolytes in there as well, by the way.
21:43
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's how you want to look at it.
21:46
Speaker 1: What is the input, and that's going to really heavily
21:48
Speaker 1: influence the output. So if I'm consuming all this overstimulating shit,
21:52
Speaker 1: what's gonna happen. I'm gonna be overstimulated, and I'm going
21:54
Speaker 1: to be producing shit, okay, shit, focus, shit, attention span, shit, work, output,
22:01
Speaker 1: all of the above. So my second last point is
22:03
Speaker 1: that peace is where ambition, where you kind of allow
22:06
Speaker 1: ambition to mature, and when you're not frantic, when you're
22:11
Speaker 1: not chasing this validation like I spoke about in the
22:13
Speaker 1: last episode, you're starting to build things that really last
22:17
Speaker 1: and really matter to you and make you feel calm,
22:20
Speaker 1: at ease, excited, happy, optimistic about the future, happy about
22:25
Speaker 1: your relationships, happy about your progress. You go to bed
22:28
Speaker 1: at night being like that was a nice day. You know,
22:30
Speaker 1: you didn't have to be a perfect day, but overall,
22:33
Speaker 1: I feel good. I feel good in myself that feeling,
22:36
Speaker 1: that feeling is what you want to be focusing on.
22:41
Speaker 1: You want to be waking up in the morning thinking
22:43
Speaker 1: if I wanted to go to bed being like, yeah,
22:45
Speaker 1: that was a really nice day, Like that was I
22:47
Speaker 1: felt good. It doesn't have to be anything crazy exciting happening,
22:51
Speaker 1: but what would be the things that would have to
22:53
Speaker 1: happen for you to have that result at the end
22:55
Speaker 1: of the day. And a lot of the time, it's
22:57
Speaker 1: like you just felt good within yourself. Okay, you felt unstimulated, calm, relaxed,
23:04
Speaker 1: that you were able to focus. Maybe you had a
23:06
Speaker 1: nice interaction and then you did you know that important
23:08
Speaker 1: thing at the start of the day, whenever in the
23:09
Speaker 1: day for you. So you realize that when you have
23:14
Speaker 1: this piece, your goals are we going to become much clearer.
23:17
Speaker 1: Your effort is a lot sharper and cleaner, okay, and
23:21
Speaker 1: you're able to get through things way faster than you realized.
23:25
Speaker 1: So you're not abandoning ambition. You're just fine tuning, fine tuning,
23:29
Speaker 1: fine tuning, and your ambition is actually going to be
23:32
Speaker 1: a lot sharper, a lot better. You're going to be
23:34
Speaker 1: a lot happier with the kind of ambition that you
23:36
Speaker 1: have when you change how you look at, you know,
23:42
Speaker 1: hustle versus being strategic about how you want to go
23:45
Speaker 1: about achieving things within your life. Okay, so the last
23:48
Speaker 1: point is your rebrand for the year. This is what
23:51
Speaker 1: your rebrand is going to be. Calm, clear, and self
23:55
Speaker 1: led based on the last ten days. Okay, this is
23:58
Speaker 1: you this year. You're calm, you're clear, and you are
24:02
Speaker 1: self led. You're making the decisions for yourself. You're the
24:06
Speaker 1: one deciding if it's you know, if you're seeking validation
24:09
Speaker 1: or if you're doing something for you. You are the
24:10
Speaker 1: one that's deciding what's urgent and what's not. Thank you
24:13
Speaker 1: very much. You are the one that's deciding what that
24:15
Speaker 1: important thing is in the day and what you're going
24:19
Speaker 1: to do to contribute to your day to make you
24:21
Speaker 1: feel good. You are leading the way. You are making
24:24
Speaker 1: these decisions for yourself, and it's feeling good. It feels empowering.
24:27
Speaker 1: Your self esteem goes up, your confidence goes up. You
24:30
Speaker 1: start feeling comfortable in your own skin. So you want
24:33
Speaker 1: to be thinking that the most magnetic energy isn't this
24:35
Speaker 1: like kind of urgency, all right, it's someone who's grounded,
24:39
Speaker 1: who's not being rushed or hurried, and who's taking it
24:42
Speaker 1: at the right pace. That's really magnetic energy, and that's
24:45
Speaker 1: what you're going to be emulating this. Yeah, guys, I
24:48
Speaker 1: really hope you enjoyed this miniseries for the start of
24:51
Speaker 1: the year. I really hope it's gotten you into a
24:52
Speaker 1: really good headspace and I'm very excited to get back
24:55
Speaker 1: into our regular programming as of next week. I can
24:58
Speaker 1: hear my baby crying, so I have to go, but
25:01
Speaker 1: love you guys so much. As always, remember, be kind
25:03
Speaker 1: to yourself, be kind to your brain, don't take shit
25:05
Speaker 1: from anyone, and especially don't take shit from yourself. Duncan