Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Ready. Set. Summer! | a conversation with Katye Riselli

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Ready. Set. Summer! | a conversation with Katye Riselli · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Hi friends! Welcome back to the Simply Wholehearted podcast.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: It means so much to have you choose to take this conversation along with you today.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Amy Wicks, your host, and here at Simply Wholehearted, we provide perspective, purpose, and plans for your best life.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: Summer is officially here, and for several months now I've been talking about our summer in the Enneagram, which I cannot wait to step into.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: It'll be nine weeks of traveling through all nine types.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: But as Katie Roselli and I sat down to talk about her dominant type, a Enneagram 1, what happened was a whole lot of minutes talking about creating a Simply Summer.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: I thought it would be perfect to share this bonus conversation with one of our more frequent and favorite guests, and to help you not to panic about the no-schedule long day sibling fighting boredom constant eating and the messy house.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: I am here to help you have the summer you've always wanted with your kids.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: I promise I'm not exaggerating when I say a simply summer is completely possible for you.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: This plan works! It's our ninth summer using these concepts and resources from the Simply Summer workshop.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: And once again, I'm blown away by the real simplicity and joy it brings my kids and my mama heart.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: Just the other day, one of mine who's not usually as motivated was already strategizing how many points she needed to earn each day and which challenges were going to be her favorite.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: It was this serious moment of delight for me.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: Here's the deal.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: My kids are not the compliant sort, and if I didn't have the structure in place, it would be serious mayhem and stress.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I know how that zaps the joy out of motherhood quicker than you can say the word bored.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to love the minutes you have with your kids, and a treasure chest full of amazing memories for them to lead with.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_00: While you listen to this conversation with Katie, you can download my 50 screen-free born and buster ideas, which is perfect for those with kids 12 and under.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: Then you can get my Simply Summer Quick Start, which gives you a colorful printable to put into action immediately.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: We used this for the first two weeks of our summer, and it was exactly what we needed to help us find our new rhythm for the next couple of months.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'll be going in depth in this conversation, but the Simply Summer course has gotten a makeover.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: I have created even more colorful resources which will take you step by step to plan the schedule you desire, foster sibling unity, eliminate boredom, and help you keep a cleaner home all while giving you more time to get things done.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: It is possible.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: You can have your best summer this year.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_01: And do both.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: So and it's such a hard place, right?
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like you and I talk about this all the time because it's easy to see someone who's chosen career or someone who's chosen to stay at home and think that that is it, that that happens in relation.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: And the reality is that these days, most women who are at home are not just at home.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: And even if they are, it's not a just.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's more.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: And it's important to recognize how much you do.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_01: No matter whether you're pulling a paycheck or you're a professional volunteer in schools or in your community, um, you're living out of every all the gifts you've been given, whether you have a college degree or not, whether you have a master's degree or not, whether you've had a great job or not.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like what we bring to the table as an individual in the spaces and the time and place that God places us, we have a lot to offer.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 3:50
  unknown: Absolutely.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so, you know, to to parse it down into an either or, we lose too much.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I think it's really empowering to think about it's an and, you know, like it's you can do it all.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's just a matter of prioritizing what you want and what is the most important, and then letting that guide you.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and so it's a messy process, right?
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: Like it's a formula, right?
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: And it's different for everybody, and there's there's so many variables, right?
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like between the differences in your husband's job or the number of kids you have, um their ages, their ages.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: Do you have family close by?
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: Do you have the resources to hire help?
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: All the things.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_01: All of those things.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: And then what are you juggling?
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_01: What are you maybe, what is your side hustle?
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, what is your, you know, here you are, you're a podcaster and you're a coach.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um I'm a writer.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_01: I'm absolutely a professional volunteer.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and sometimes I sometimes I don't, but there was a period where I was able to work full-time from home with a baby.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and that was exceptional.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: So anyway, the podcast I sent you is it's um it's called Mom Mom Working in the Summer, basically.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: How do you continue to work, to hustle, as she might say?
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: Um, master your time.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: She has one episode about time mastery.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and again, she you know, she's now created Stella Dot, um, Keep Collective, ever.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um, she's got a book, and and it's really an exceptional space.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and pay they've paid over I forget how many, but it's millions, maybe close to closing in on a billion dollars in commissions into women who are part of Stella and Dot.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_01: And that's only a 10-year-old company.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's really fascinating from the perspective of, yeah, if you want to do Stella Dot, I think it's exceptional.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: You're gonna find a great community of women, but your community might be somewhere else, and those lessons I think are still relevant.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I think you're looking for voices who say, How do you do this?
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: You know, how do you make this work?
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_01: Um how do you live your best life guided by some um for us in simply wholehearted community, biblical principles of who we are and who we're created to be.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and then with that perspective, create a plan that makes sense.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: I think that is where a lot of the drive to really figure out the simply summer piece here because because we talk about taking back their calendar and not letting your time own you, but you own your time.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: But I was also thinking about the summer season and the season with littles.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: I just dropped off a meal to one of the moms in my my mom's group, and she just had a baby.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: So sweet, so much hair, so beautiful.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's really fun.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: But I was just thinking about that season with one child, and you're there alone, you've stepped out of work maybe those first three months, and you get in this time warp, and it's this really interesting thing where the the phrase that popped to my mind is how do you instead of counting the minutes, make the minutes count?
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: And just this whole philosophy of because especially when we had really little ones and you're stay-at-home mom, and there's you may not have community yet, and you don't have resources at your disposal, some of those days just feel so long, and more and more I'm talking to moms, going, it's okay.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna tell you the second half of that phrase.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: When the kids are in school and they're a little bit older, then suddenly those years are flying by.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: But right now the days are long.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: So how do you make the minutes count?
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: In that line of thinking is really where the simply summer piece came alive for me because I did look ahead to summer and thought, oh my lands, I do not like the heat.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: I do not like my season of life right now, but I don't want it to just slip away idly.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: So how do I how do I make it really invaluable?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: So all of that to say, you know, that was kind of the intent going into it, and then as they've gotten older and the community has expanded, responsibilities and opportunities and ideas and creativity start flowing, you're like, oh yeah, I need to make sure that they are well occupied so I can do and continue to work on this space over here, and it is really possible.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: I have I have found it, it's not only theory, I have actually found it to be true that I continue to do what I am doing really well, and maybe I can't put as much time to it as I did when the kids were in school, but there's almost some element where I put even a little bit more time in it because I'm not as interrupted.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: Because when they wake up in the morning, there's conversation, but they have a routine now, and I don't have to stop and get them ready for school and be super intentional in that moment because then I get my stuff done, and then I can look over and we can have a real intentional time.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: But anyway, all of that has to take the careful planning and they have to know what's expected of them, and they have to be trained, and they have to, you know, they have to be communicated to, and you have to do it in a fun, flavorful way that it's you know, it's incentivizing for them to follow through with it instead of them kicking you while they're on the couch telling you how bored they are.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because that'll happen too.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: So absolutely, and it's a process, you know, like when they're three and four, there's tiny little steps.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um, even like, you know, the first summer you and I talked about simply summer, mine were so much younger.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_01: It was probably two summers ago, maybe now.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember going, yeah, some of that's not gonna work for my preschooler.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but now we I have a kindergartner and um well, rising first grader and third grader, and we can talk about what your responsibilities are and and what the things are that we want to learn or do this summer um and make a bucket list that's collaborative and squeeze on there some fun learning things like hey, let's take piano lessons.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: And so you're gonna there's gonna be incentives for practicing your piano.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um and so that'll be fun because it's summer and it's different.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but it's it is actually a seasonal thing that shifts every summer in terms of what they can do and accomplish.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um and so your youngest is the same age as my oldest.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: So you're totally in a different, you're able to kind of up the bar and have a different level of conversation.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, it's very different because the first year we did it, I was pregnant with my third, and I had a two and a three-year-old.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: So for them, it was like having a potty training chart, right?
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it was very short, you know, challenges, a quick reward.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: I only did it for a week at a time, and my main goal was nap time, playtime, and learn how to make a bowl of cereal on their own.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it was so simplistic.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I think we ended up tying in some swim lessons in that, you know, as the summer evolved and as you know, we kind of got the hang of it, and they got the idea of what the super summer challenge was, and I figured out what a simply summer would look like for me.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: But it was, you know, very short, majorable goals in a small amount of time.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_00: And now my kids can talk about a whole summer of nine weeks, that sort of goal.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: And back then it was like, okay, what can we do each week for three months?
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Knowing that we don't even have preschool coming up in the fall.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: We just have baby, you know, number three joining us, and we've got to figure that out.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, each year it looks, it looks very different.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I that's what I've I've loved about this is that I had heard that people did it through high school, even beyond.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: And but I, you know, I didn't know.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: I started with my kids really young.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: I I didn't even know what it could look like at that age.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: And but just each year kind of adapting and and changing it to what we had available to us.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I I think that's the beauty of the Simply Summer course because it's I've put in there all that I have I've learned from other people, but I've also used firsthand and have incorporated in some form or fashion.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: I make it look a lot nicer than the poster board that my kids actually prefer, which is so funny.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_00: They I so I printed off our nice, colorful, you know, you know, done in Canva type printables, and they were like, Well, this is okay, mom, but what are you doing the poster boards?
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, really?
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: They're used to it.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: This is our traditional summer for them, that's what it looks like.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_01: For the rest of us, we love your free downloads.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: I love the idea of okay, like this is this is the template, and and then because I need it to like be bite-sized and right uh have to realize it's not gonna be perfect right away.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna do it in pencil.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, uh that's right.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_01: But it's fun.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: And the other I think I love about your course is that um you give permission to make it your own, you know, because I think really what you're doing is the course gives you ideas and it teaches you, but it really empowers you to think for yourself about let me take my this like, especially if you have tiny people at home full time, like this this huge chunk of time that seems like forever because I'm not gonna sleep for like five years.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um let me take this chunk of time and let me break it down into four weeks and then look at like what are some things we want to do in four weeks?
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and then or what do I want to do June, July, and August?
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: How do we put some placeholders on there that as a mom I can look forward to?
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: As a professional, I can work around.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and then what that does too, what I think it's really done for me hanging out with you is oh, I can do this all year long.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: So like I can look at seasonally the summer and then the fall and the winter and the spring, and suddenly I can make intentional choices about my life and my schedule, and then our family schedule, um, our marriage, you know.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, look at that.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_01: We haven't been on a date in an entire quarter.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: This is not okay.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_01: We can actually need to work on that, even if it's a like a date on the back patio.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: Uh-huh.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_01: Where we intentionally set down sometimes talk, but um, but I think that's what your course does.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: I think it really tees up, um, it teaches us how to do that, and then it gives us some ideas of things that we can be excited about.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, even in the free workshop, I take the first module of the Simply Summer course, and I it's meaningful minutes, and it's that concept of making the minutes count.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's that's just the first module.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: And if you did that, if that's all you did, I think people would see a shift in their motherhood.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: They would see a shift in their summer and how they spent it.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_00: It just walks you through you know what it would look like to essentially time block as a mom.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: And and then it's very customized.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's helping you walk through your own steps.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: And then with if you're doing the Simply Summer course, the next one is is really about diving into what it is that you want to accomplish.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: What is it that you want to do as a mom with your family, some of the dreams that you've maybe had for years, even before you were a mom, of just this idea of this is what I want in my motherhood to look like.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: And then you, you know, you just it's taking a moment to write those down and to think through that, and then thinking what your kids might need.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: And then as they get older, dialoguing with them, you know, what they want.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: And what I had a lot of fun putting together was I called it picking your summer style.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I I have six different types of what we call as the super summer challenge that you can incorporate within your simply summer.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: And it invites people to look and evaluate how much time they actually have to do something like that with their kids and taking the time, how much they want to, how the interest level in their home for it, the need for it, and you pick, you know, one or two that might work that you could try out the summer.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: And then you plug and it walks you through plugging in those information and incorporating the reward piece of it and even just how to break down the nitty-gritty of points.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: The part that takes me the longest when I'm preparing my super summer challenge, and especially this year, as we talked about last year, we did I started the summer with saying you had to do 200 points to get the ultimate reward.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: Well, they kind of blew that out of the water pretty quick, and again, didn't they get there like crazy fast?
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: Way too fast, which was great.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: I was glad they were that motivated, but I was like, well, well, we are only halfway through the summer, so we've got to actually rewards.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, exactly.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: So this year I've already prepped them by saying 300 points is what we're going for, and of course I have one that goes, Oh my gosh, I'll never do it, I'll never be able to get it done.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it it always works out fine.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_00: It just you know through her for a loop.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: But anyway, again, we've done it all the different ways.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_00: We've done it for a week, we've done it for a month, we've done bingo, we've done a camp version.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: And in fact, I for a lot of Grammys out there who do a camp with their grandkids, this Yeah, like camp, Mimi and Pappy.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: This gives gives a great template and some ideas to work of how that week could look like.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_00: I've even created like this cute little camp schedule and the routine and the daily activities that you can either print off and you can run with it, or you can customize yourself.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, I because I do it all summer long, I always think, oh, it'd be super fun to, you know, to do mom camp.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, ah, never mind.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'll I'll all summer long is mom camp.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: Who am I kidding?
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_00: For those of you who have some amazing, you know, parents or an auntie, or you know, there's all sorts of different family members who have filled that role full peop for people and can step in and and run with some ideas like that.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: So so for you, what's this summer looking like with the girls?
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_00: What are they excited about besides the piano lessons?
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_00: What are how what is that rhythm, ideal rhythm look like for you?
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_01: We go to the pool every day.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's a big thing.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: And we've got an indoor pool, so it makes that yeah, we can go either way, um, regardless of the weather.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_01: But some of it is is um for us, and I think for a lot of military families, it's easier to break it down in smaller chunks.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_01: Especially if you are like moving or something in the summertime, like you do before the during and the after the move.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_01: And what I think it does, and I think we had just moved here when you and I first started talking about this.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_01: So I haven't done a move with it yet.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_01: What will and what it will do is it'll create something that's normal and routine, even when home is a totally different state or house or whatever.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: But for us this summer, we're trying a few new things, like we're gonna try piano lessons and we're going to um for my youngest, she's gonna do swim lessons for the first time and she she can swim, but she hasn't had an actual lesson.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like the official stroke method and all of that.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and you know her, so you understand when I say she totally believes she can swim.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, she can.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_01: And she maybe could, but there's a benefit to actually learning the skill also.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: And to knock around.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_00: Very important.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm all about her confidence, and so we're not telling her she can't, we're just encouraging her to get even better.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: So this morning we came home and she said, I think I'm almost a fish.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_01: I'm almost there.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my word, that girl is so adorable.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_01: So my oldest has been a fish and she's been swimming strokes and laps in the pool since she was like four and a half.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so we've referred to her as a fish basically for the youngest whole whole life.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: And so she felt pretty accomplished when she got out of the park.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_01: I'm almost a fish.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_00: I am almost like my big sister.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: So that's pretty good.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_01: So that's that.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_01: And it's you know, moving, getting out.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_01: We've talked about this, exercising, yeah, um, doing some fun things that we don't get to do when we have a schedule.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um or when you don't have school eating up eight hours a day.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, we could look at it one way.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, I don't have you know, eight hours of entertainment for my kids, or I get those eight hours back to do some really fun.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: So we're gonna go do fun things in Kansas City that we can't do because to drive from where we live all the way to the city doesn't happen on a school day.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: Nope.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_01: So we're gonna go to the zoo and we're gonna go to kaleidoscope and other fun things that our bucket list planning is for tomorrow.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_01: We're doing that tomorrow morning.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_00: Awesome.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_01: And then we'll see how my schedule shakes out for how much how much work I have.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: So we'll work around that too.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you're gonna be throwing in some work schedule.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: How do you how do you communicate that with the girls?
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: What does that look like as you will be all new territory because we moved three summers in a row?
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_01: Um I don't really take contract projects during the summer when we're moving.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: Um and then last summer we weren't moving, um, but I decided I really wanted because we'd moved the three previous summers, yeah, I didn't want to work.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: Like I wanted a real summer.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_01: We I wanted to live at the pool and hang out with them and read books.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_01: And go to the botanical gardens and literally just have summer.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um, which is really my what I hope to do this summer, but this opportunity, if it comes to pass, will just be something that we talk through together.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe it's you know a couple hours here and there in the mornings um since the pool doesn't open right away.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_01: So things like that of hey, these are this is your time to do one of these things that's on your list.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_01: And when we get to this point in the day, I will hopefully be able to say, I'm offline and I'm with you until later.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: I found too when you put those parameters in place, and again, for me to feel like summer, it has to feel very loose, it has to have a lot of fluidity and flexibility for me to not feel pinned in.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I think my kids are are very much like that, but they have to have something.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: Otherwise, they are, you know, lying around, you know, rolling and saying, I'm bored, I don't know what to do.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: But when I give them those, hey, you know, before lunchtime, this is what we're gonna do.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: After lunchtime, this is the plan, these are the evening things that we have lined up this week, or you know, or whatever fun things that we have on the schedule.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: They suddenly, you know, time doesn't see this endless stretch.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_00: They they take advantage of it and they they play the things that they've been looking forward to all school year and haven't had the time for.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_00: And then it's a win-win because I'm doing what I need to do to to work hard and to grow on my skills and you know, my craft.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then they're growing their imagination and their independent play and and just even all the other things that they have intertwined with that, which is you know, journaling and some Bible time and making their own breakfast and serving people.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I always think whether it's summer, any time of the year, I love the verse that says the boundary lines have fallen in pleasant places.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_00: Me too.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_01: I just think that that there's a beauty and a purpose, and it's a God-ordained purpose for boundary lines, whether it's don't go past this line or stay in between in this lane.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um, when we recognize and respect those, I do much better.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_01: And when my kids start to learn them, we all do better because I tend to be a little more black and white, schedule oriented.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_01: We live in a military community, so everything's schedule oriented.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_01: Um just understanding those boundaries and creating those, like we're training them to look for that.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_01: So you can do anything on this list during this time frame, and we're gonna make sure we get outside and we're gonna make sure we get exercise and we're gonna eat healthy, and you're gonna learn to cook some things by yourself.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm going to relax my control break mama tendencies.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: No, and step back.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_01: We don't have any of those.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and give you the kid, you know, the kid-friendly knife, but this one's you.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: No, you do, you do.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's an important thing is that you have to relinquish some control.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: And that's when a ton of growth happened for my kids.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: When I was willing to let things be a little bit messier, things fall apart, knowing that they come back together again, that we can restore order, because order is important.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_00: Order is important for my creativity and the content creation and you know, getting my work done, it can't feel like complete chaos.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: But there is an element of letting that go for a little bit so they can find their way and also not be afraid to try and fail.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: The more I am anxiously hovering over them as they learn how to bake something or cook something or fold or do the laundry or clean this up or create, you know, whatever, then they are less likely to find success or to even be willing to try.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: So as we step back and let go of some of those things, which it takes growth for us.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like we have to, I grow, I feel like I grow a little bit more every year in that where I measure, oh yeah, I let that go a little bit more.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: But in that, then the kids have learned a lot more each time and have been willing to do that, and then there is a whole lot more fun.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: And it all in the end can be fixed and cleaned up and put back together.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: So true.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: I think that's a for me, that's my favorite part of summer, is that so many of the other things that have to be in a specific way can kind of fall apart.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that's probably school, like the school schedule, and you have to be up and you have to make the bus, and these things have to happen.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_01: And so that the relax in the schedule actually gives the grace and the freedom to look for the fun.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_01: And I think I think that's something that's really resonated in a lot of conversations I had lately, is just moms or women who are like, I can't remember the last time I had a lot of fun, like that I really enjoyed this.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um and I think that's probably the heart of summer.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_01: I think is um it's it needs to be fun.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_01: We need to enjoy it.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um and that's not to say we're gonna enjoy everything, but are we gonna do one or two things every day that we're like, yeah, I'm excited about that.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_01: I'm enjoying it, or I um I'm having fun.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_01: And I think kids forget to have fun.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_01: We forget that we're part of it, and so um my girls know my happy place is the pool.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_01: If I can't be at the I want to be at the pool.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_01: That's right, that's right.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um so you'll find me in my happy place, and that's gonna make every day better.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I might have a hat on a lot because of it.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_01: That's right, that's right.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_00: If you've been around a while, then you know firsthand my journey into better understanding the Enneagram and my coaching training.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_00: I've come to learn the insights of the Enneagram give a clear-cut path to your best wholehearted life.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're new to the Enneagram or you just now have the bandwidth to learn a little bit more, I have several simple ways for you to become more knowledgeable and closer to better understanding your type.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_00: First, my Enneagram Quick Start Guide gives you a rundown of my favorite resources and the step-by-step discovery process.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's my free gift to you and easy to download.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_00: Now, as you learn a bit more and decide you're ready for a general overview, you can download my Anneagram OneSheet, which is a summary of all nine types.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then, if you decide you're interested in learning more about your dominant type or even introducing this helpful resource to your family or business, I'm a certified Anneagram coach, and I have a few limited spaces for one-on-one coaching, group teaching, or my five-session special.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_00: Combining the insight of the Aneagram and the truth of the gospel, together we can discover your type and the best path of growth for wholehearted living.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let's move past the messy middle, get free from the shame-based ending, and instead reboot your story by better understanding your season and uncover the fruit of your best life.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: Not everyone is right for this type of coaching, but if you want to find out more and if you would be a good fit, you can get a free 30-minute consult.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_00: Just get your name on the wait list and I'll be in touch.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: The links are in the show notes, and you can find out more at simply wholehearted.com.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_00: Well, that's perfect because that leads in us into the summer, some of the summer questions that we were asking here as we kind of tee up to our summer in the Anneagram.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_00: But that is what sounds fun to you this summer?
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you kind of talked about the pool, but in particular, do you have something that the girls know you're really looking forward to?
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_01: We are gonna go on a family trip with my in-laws to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's awesome.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and so that will include a beach and water.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and it will also include for them all their cousins.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_01: And there's nine of them.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_00: Oh man, um so much fun.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: They're all with there's two teenagers, and then everybody else is stacked right together.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_01: There's two 10-year-olds, two eight-year-olds, a six, five, and four.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: Oh fun.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so that's gonna just be fun.
• 30:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um I'm married into a pretty fun family.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_01: My family's really fun.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so there was a high bar.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_00: But um yes, but thankfully you jumped into another.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_01: They're they're great.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_01: And so we're gonna do that, and that's pretty fun.
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and then other than that, we we're gonna unlike the rest of our year, summer is not as planned.
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's so great.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_00: And that is really fun.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_01: It is.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_01: So that's pretty fun.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I don't have so that sounds fun.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um being outside and being near the pool or an ocean or a lake um will be spectacular.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: I know another important thing for you are books because you and I swap book lists often.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_00: So what's gonna be the book that you're reading, you know, on that beach chair on that vacation?
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know because that's a month away.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and so there might be a few between four books between.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I love about you.
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's so great.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_01: Uh there's probably, I think, most consistently in the summer.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_01: In general, I go for what a book a week.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's all year, but I definitely hit it in the summer.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so I think right now that you would say, yeah, you gotta you gotta check that out for the summer.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I just read uh Next Year in Havana by Chanel Clayton.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and it was awesome.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_01: It was really, really great.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_01: Predominantly set in Cuba in the 19th, in 1958, 1959, right before the revolution, um, where Fidel Castro came to power.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_01: And so it follows a family, uh, one girl in a family, and they left after the they were basically exiled and came to the United States.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_01: In 2017, this girl's granddaughter travels back to Cuba once the restrictions had been eased, and she unravels her grandmother's story.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: Oh wow, it's that one's fascinating.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's great.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_01: I love it.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_01: I love stories that jump between times and tell you a story.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_01: It was really good to just get lost in.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it was a good fiction read.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_00: And that's another book for the summer.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_01: Let me get lost.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, and it was great writing.
• 32:20
  SPEAKER_01: There were so many passages that I was like, that's just a great, like you could take it out of class.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_01: Like, that's just a great observation about life.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_00: I love fictional books like that.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_00: That that to me, I've written down, you know, in my index cards that you know, I'm always like writing my notes, you know, when I encounter, you know, my stack of index cards that are crazy.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_00: But I do that.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_00: I've read some really great fiction books where I write something down, I'm like, this is a profound life quotable statement, you know, not just not just part of the stuff.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so next year in Havana was really great.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and then I have a ton of book recommendations on my Instagram.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, definitely it's worth following you for book recommendations.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's really, really good.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the most important question of all that you will answer today.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_00: Because ice cream is synonymous with summer.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_00: True, true.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_00: What is your favorite ice cream flavor that we can find in your freezer or when you are at the local ice cream store by the bees?
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_01: So my favorite is mint chocolate chip.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_01: And you will not find it in my freezer because it is a red light food.
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_01: And if I have it in my freezer, I will eat all of it.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_01: Gotcha, gotcha.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_01: So in my freezer, you will find cookies and cream because that is everyone else's favorite.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I do love it, but I can say no to it.
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_01: This is but if you put mint chocolate chip in my freezer, I will say no.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: Forget it.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I'm sort of that way about chocolate peanut butter combination.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, it's almond milk or dairy-free ice cream.
• 33:51
  unknown: Right.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_00: But still, they're really good ones, and it still has plenty of sugar.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: There's nothing healthy about it.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_00: It just doesn't hurt my tummy.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_01: So true.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: So well, that's so fun.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_01: I really enjoy talking about summer.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_01: Me too.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, we're looking forward to maybe getting you out to talk with some military families about simply summer.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that would be awesome.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_00: I would love to do that.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: That'll be really that'll be really awesome.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_00: And to have, you know, a tour and some barbecue with the family.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_00: Ready, set, let's summer.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you still want more help planning your best Simply Summer, I've created a discount code just for you all.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_00: Just type in Simply for 10% off my already very affordable lifetime workshop price.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_00: Each year, I create new updates, resources, and even this year I offered my previous attendees a free 30-minute Simply Summer coaching call.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: Doing a Simply Summer with others and friends can be even more fun.
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_00: I sure love for you to share this resource with all your mama friends.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, we want you to invite others to join us as we step into a summer in the Aneagram, which starts this Thursday.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_00: We'll be traveling through all nine types and do a few overviews as we dive into this insightful personality tool.
• 35:11
  SPEAKER_00: We will have some of our favorite guests back on the podcast, sharing their personal experience as their unique Anneagram type, and of course, their books, conferences, and so much more.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_00: Don't forget to check us on Instagram and Facebook as we are posting giveaways, fun Anneagram tips, and so much more.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_00: Let's continue to invite others to join us as we continue to pursue perspective, purpose, and plans for a simpler, full hearted life.