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When Obedience Hurts: Trusting God in the Middle of Heartbreak · Girl, Date the Good Guy ™ | Healing After Heartbreak & A Toxic Relationship

• 0:04
  Hey sis, welcome back to another episode of Girl Date the Good Guy. It's your girl, Emily.
• 0:10
  And today I felt led to talk about something different. I was originally going
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  to release another episode, but an event unfolded in my life and I just felt
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  really led to release what the Holy Spirit was putting on my heart.
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  Now, if I cry through this, please forgive me.
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  Life happens. Life is real. We go through ups and downs.
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  And that's why we have Jesus to help us through every bit of it.
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  So today I want to talk about the pebbles of life, a surrender story.
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  Sis, I want you to picture this. Imagine your life is a bag of pebbles. At first, it's light.
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  One hurt, one disappointment, one betrayal.
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  You drop it in the bag. It's manageable. Then another heartbreak,
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  another mistake, another cycle.
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  You add another pebble. The bag gets heavier, but you can still carry it. So you keep going.
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  You keep choosing your way. You keep managing it yourself. You keep saying,
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  I got this, until one day you don't. The bag becomes so heavy,
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  you can't carry it anymore.
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  And that's usually when we finally fall to our knees and say,
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  God, I can't do this anymore.
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  I'm tired of living in my own will. I want yours.
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  We repeat cycles until we can't bear them anymore.
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  Some people, when their bag becomes too heavy, lose hope completely.
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  Others finally turn to God because he is our true savior.
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  So many people try to do life without God, believing their will is better.
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  But here's the truth. God will let you choose your will. He will let you walk in your sin.
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  He will let you carry your bag.
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  But until you turn to him, he will not override your surrender.
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  It says in Proverbs 3, 5 through 6, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and
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  lean not on your own understanding.
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  In all your ways submit to him and he will make your path straight notice it
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  says submit straight paths come after surrender restoration comes after repentance
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  redemption comes after release.
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  Now, here's something people don't talk about. When I finally surrendered,
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  fully surrendered, because my bag was too heavy, it didn't immediately get lighter. It got heavier.
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  And that confused me because I learned something.
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  Sometimes God allows the weight to remain so you learn to rely on Him, not this world.
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  He wants your faith to stand on Him, not on comfort, not on relationships, not on circumstances.
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  Being disobedient can cost you, but obedience can hurt too.
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  And obedience is not God trying to hold you back from blessings.
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  It's Him protecting you from destruction.
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  This world will never give you the rest that your soul desires because it feeds
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  the flesh. and the flesh always demands more.
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  Only God fulfills the spirit.
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  Recently, my daughter came to live with me after I took a huge leap of faith out of my toxic cycle.
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  After I had surrendered my own will, I felt like I just was continuously surrendering my will to God.
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  Literally, it's a daily surrender and I had to leave her with her father and
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  it completely broke me because I watched her hug me because I was leaving but
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  I knew that I had to be obedient as hard as that was,
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  well she came back and I thought maybe this was restoration but unfortunately
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  she decided to go to go back to live with her father.
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  I saw it, the pattern, the familiarity, the pull of what feels known,
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  even if it's not healthy.
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  And at 18, what do you really know?
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  The path to God can feel lonely, sis, because obedience is hard.
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  So with tears in my eyes, I lovingly released her again.
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  And that is very hard for a mother that truly loves her child because I can't fix her.
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  I can't force her to open her eyes. I just can't. Everybody comes to God in their own time.
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  But I know something, just like I did.
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  She will carry her own bag of pebbles until it becomes too heavy.
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  And I just pray when that moment comes, she turns to God where life is truly found.
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  Now, after she told me she was leaving, I went into my room and cried.
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  I put on praise and worship music and I just cried. And while I was crying,
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  God gave me Psalms 31 and verse 14 to 15 says, But I trust in you, Lord.
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  I say you are my God.
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  My times are in your hands.
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  My times are in your hands, not mine, not hers, his.
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  God's way is better. And that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.
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  It doesn't mean I don't cry it doesn't mean surrender is painless it means I
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  have a father who comforts me while I'm hurting and that changes everything,
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  so sis maybe you're carrying a bag of pebbles right now maybe it's heavy,
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  maybe you're tired, maybe you've been doing life in your own will.
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  But you don't have to wait until it crushes you you can surrender now because
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  the world will exhaust you, but God will restore you.
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  And even when surrender feels heavy, his hands are strong enough to carry what you cannot.
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  I love you, sis. I'll talk to you soon. Bye for now.