Latest / QUESTION EVERYTHING / Your Ego Isn't the Enemy. It's the Map: with Laura Day (psychic + healer)

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Your Ego Isn't the Enemy. It's the Map: with Laura Day (psychic + healer) · QUESTION EVERYTHING

0:03
Speaker 1: No one has all the answers, but when we ask
0:05
Speaker 1: the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths,
0:11
Speaker 1: closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist
0:16
Speaker 1: Danielle Robe, and each week, my guests and I come
0:19
Speaker 1: together to challenge the status quo and our own.
0:22
Speaker 2: Ways of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not?
0:28
Speaker 2: And who says?
0:30
Speaker 3: So?
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Speaker 1: Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's time
0:36
Speaker 1: to question everything. Hell, I hope you're having a beautiful,
0:42
Speaker 1: beautiful week. Today's all about intuition, and we really talk
0:47
Speaker 1: about intuition a lot, but what is it actually right? So,
0:52
Speaker 1: psychology today defines it as a form of knowledge that
0:54
Speaker 1: appears in consciousness without obvious deliberation. So it's not mat
1:00
Speaker 1: but a faculty in which hunches are generated by the
1:03
Speaker 1: unconscious mind rapidly sifting through past experiences and cumulative knowledge.
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Speaker 1: In other words, it's your gut powered by everything you've
1:13
Speaker 1: ever seen, heard, and lived. But here's the hiccup with that, right,
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Speaker 1: what if you're cumulative knowledge, the thing that's supposed to
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Speaker 1: fuel your intuition is actually blocking it. Let's say you
1:25
Speaker 1: grew up in a tough neighborhood, and people weren't truthful
1:30
Speaker 1: and were always kind of shady. Now you assume everyone's lying,
1:34
Speaker 1: or maybe your mom cheated on your dad growing up,
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Speaker 1: so your gut tells you that your boyfriend probably is
1:39
Speaker 1: going to cheat on you too. That's not intuition. That's
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Speaker 1: unprocessed patterning disguised as a hunch. So enter this week's guest,
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Speaker 1: Laura Day. She's a New York Times bestselling author, a
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Speaker 1: world renowned intuitive and the Advisor CEO, and celebrities like
2:01
Speaker 1: Demi Moor and Brad Pitt call on when they need answers.
2:04
Speaker 1: She's consulted for billion dollar companies, train the military in
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Speaker 1: remote viewing, and helped people all over the world tap
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Speaker 1: into their intuition in practical, measurable ways, and her latest book,
2:16
Speaker 1: The Prism, might be her most personal work yet. She
2:20
Speaker 1: says intuition is not mystical, it's measurable. She says you
2:25
Speaker 1: don't need to believe in it to even use it.
2:27
Speaker 1: And everything you're searching for clarity in your career, your relationships,
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Speaker 1: even your health, she says, it's already inside of you.
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Speaker 1: We just haven't been taught how to access it. But
2:38
Speaker 1: here's the key.
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Speaker 2: In order to access it from a clear and grounded place,
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Speaker 2: we have to understand our prism, the system that we
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Speaker 2: use to process reality.
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Speaker 3: You're your magic wand you think, you do, you connect,
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Speaker 3: you create, you choose. There is nothing more magic than you.
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Speaker 1: Laura bill don Freud's idea that our ego begins developing
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Speaker 1: an early childhood, within the first three to seven years
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Speaker 1: of life, and then evolves from there. And what she
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Speaker 1: proposes is that our ego is actually not the enemy.
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Speaker 2: Like so much of pop psychology says, what.
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Speaker 3: Your prism or ego actually does is it takes. If
3:19
Speaker 3: you know, we're all into spirituality, but we are in
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Speaker 3: bodies in a physical world. That's what we're here to master.
3:26
Speaker 3: So then what the prism does or the ego does,
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Speaker 3: is it takes that energy we share. Because if you're
3:32
Speaker 3: just one perfect energy, you're not evolving.
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Speaker 1: And while all of this may sound woo woo, Laura
3:39
Speaker 1: is anything, but her method is grounded in structure and
3:43
Speaker 1: real world data. She's not really here to talk vibes.
3:46
Speaker 1: I thought she would be, but she's more interested in
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Speaker 1: talking about results.
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Speaker 3: Part of the problem is everyone's always looking for a
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Speaker 3: sign you don't need a sign if you decide, if
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Speaker 3: you are determined.
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Speaker 1: So in this conversation, Laura breaks down how to rewire
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Speaker 1: our responses, shift our patterns, and use intuition as a tool,
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Speaker 1: not a feeling, to change our lives.
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Speaker 3: What do you want to create? Because you can create it,
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Speaker 3: you don't have to believe in it. It doesn't have
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Speaker 3: to feel good, it doesn't have to be good. There's
4:17
Speaker 3: this thing about worthiness. I feel that I'm worthy of love.
4:21
Speaker 3: Who made a worthiness rule? I mean, look at all
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Speaker 3: the hideous people who've achieved amazing things. There's no worthiness rule.
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Speaker 3: If you want it, there's a system to get it.
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Speaker 3: You are that system, and that is the Prism.
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Speaker 1: So today we're circling one big question. What does it
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Speaker 1: really take to change your life? And how do you
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Speaker 1: access the intuition that's already inside of you to do it?
4:44
Speaker 1: It's time to question everything with Laura Day. Laura, I've
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Speaker 1: been following your work for some time. I'm really excited
4:53
Speaker 1: to speak with you. Thank you for taking the time.
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Speaker 3: Thank you.
4:57
Speaker 1: Okay, So the Prism, so much of about your work
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Speaker 1: and this book is about intuition, and you write you
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Speaker 1: may not know it, but you have the inate ability
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Speaker 1: to get the information you need about anyone and anything
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Speaker 1: at any point in time. The idea that we have
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Speaker 1: everything we need, that we know everything already is something
5:17
Speaker 1: I don't think. I hear a lot of people talk about.
5:20
Speaker 1: There's a lot of outsourcing in the self help world nowadays.
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Speaker 2: What does that knowing feel like? What should we be
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Speaker 2: looking out for?
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Speaker 3: I think we trap ourselves in a lot of useless paradigms,
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Speaker 3: and so we think we're making changes, but we're not really.
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Speaker 3: What is so important and the prism starts with this,
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Speaker 3: as does any productive intuitive work. What are your goals?
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Speaker 3: You know, if you were both bow and arrow, what's
5:47
Speaker 3: your goal's eye? So when people start a process, it's
5:53
Speaker 3: so important to know where you're going, and then to
5:55
Speaker 3: not get frustrated with yourself because the reality is you
6:00
Speaker 3: can't change from within. You know, we're taught to naval gaze,
6:03
Speaker 3: and you really you can't change from within. You need
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Speaker 3: a catalyst. Your patterns hold you together, but they also
6:10
Speaker 3: hold you in place, and so there are many ways
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Speaker 3: to find a catalyst. Intuition is really the only way
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Speaker 3: that you can do alone.
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Speaker 1: Is it true that women are able to tap into
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Speaker 1: their intuition more naturally.
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Speaker 3: No, actually that is a huge fallacy because intuition is
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Speaker 3: a detached state. Intuition is the ability to get data.
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Speaker 3: And the way that the traditionally female brain works is
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Speaker 3: that there's a lot of communication between the two hemispheres.
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Speaker 3: There's actually structurally more connection, and so the detachment that
6:50
Speaker 3: is needed to document information kind of without bias, is
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Speaker 3: less effective in the traditionally female brain. There are other
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Speaker 3: things that, of course that brain is more effective for,
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Speaker 3: certainly more effective for certain intuitive skills like telepathy and mediumship,
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Speaker 3: which is the ability to literally become something else. But ladies,
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Speaker 3: that also has a downside, you know, which I think
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Speaker 3: is so important to get into and in the prism
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Speaker 3: I get into it because it has someone else driving
7:22
Speaker 3: your vehicle.
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Speaker 1: Well, I think you're hitting on the cornerstone of your
7:26
Speaker 1: entire body of work, which is integrating light and dark.
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Speaker 1: Do you feel like that you had a very tumultuous upbringing.
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Speaker 3: I've had two siblings suicide, my mother suicided, my uncle suicided.
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Speaker 3: Other than having definitely different neurology, we had very abusive childhoods.
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Speaker 3: And I think that in a sense that either creates
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Speaker 3: people who survive or who don't survive. But one of
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Speaker 3: the things that intuition does, and that really is in
7:55
Speaker 3: many ways the luck of having a certain kind of
7:57
Speaker 3: brain is it allows the guidance, so to speak. And
8:02
Speaker 3: I don't mean guidance like spirit guide. I mean you
8:05
Speaker 3: need to know something above your pay grade. When I
8:09
Speaker 3: was five, I was alone in an apartment every night
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Speaker 3: with three younger children and no adult. So you need
8:14
Speaker 3: to know how to heat a bottle, but you don't
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Speaker 3: really know how to heat a bottle. And what all
8:20
Speaker 3: human beings are capable of is intuitively, so leaving the ego,
8:26
Speaker 3: leaving self, and especially when you're below seven and you
8:29
Speaker 3: don't really have a self structured yet and just grabbing
8:34
Speaker 3: into that common energy that we call, you know, spirit,
8:38
Speaker 3: which science just calls energy. I don't recommend trauma as
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Speaker 3: an intuitive development tool because many like my siblings, don't
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Speaker 3: survive it, but it certainly I think points to the fact.
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Speaker 3: And it's one of my favorite phrases, which is your
8:54
Speaker 3: pathology can be your potential. You know, you have to
8:57
Speaker 3: work with what you have, and we're especially younger people.
9:02
Speaker 3: With the Internet and with social media, you think people
9:07
Speaker 3: have all of these things that you need, and actually
9:11
Speaker 3: you are a perfect version of you. And when you
9:15
Speaker 3: learn to market that, so to speak, whether it's in
9:18
Speaker 3: love or in business, or to have a skill that
9:23
Speaker 3: rewards you economically, when you are your you and you
9:28
Speaker 3: market that well using intuition to the world, you create
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Speaker 3: a life that is great for you.
9:36
Speaker 1: I like that you say that intuition is a skill
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Speaker 1: that has been my experience. I'm wondering what you're able
9:44
Speaker 1: to share for all of us that are still working
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Speaker 1: on it. What is the first step if you're not
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Speaker 1: in touch with it.
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Speaker 3: If you're not in touch with it, what's happening is
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Speaker 3: your subconscious is using it. Oh, you're still trying to
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Speaker 3: prove you the smartest person in third grade. You're getting
10:00
Speaker 3: yourself in trouble, or you're trying to save mommy and
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Speaker 3: daddy and you're bringing people in who are inappropriate. If
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Speaker 3: you are not conscious of your intuition, then under your
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Speaker 3: conscious awareness, it has a dialogue with the world around
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Speaker 3: you that really just keeps recreating difficulties. You know, it
10:19
Speaker 3: keeps you really stuck. So the first way to use
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Speaker 3: intuition consciously is very unmagical. It's what is it you
10:27
Speaker 3: want to create? And you know when you have a goal,
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Speaker 3: all you are persistent with that goal. I mean, part
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Speaker 3: of the problem is we think this, we need this,
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Speaker 3: we want this, we need to address this. And so
10:38
Speaker 3: what I ask you to do and in the prison,
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Speaker 3: really what you do first is you set those three goals.
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Speaker 3: Because when you have a goal, you have a filing system.
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Speaker 3: But you also are looking in the right direction. Now,
10:53
Speaker 3: of course we find what we are looking for. So
10:57
Speaker 3: it's really important. And the reason that the book is
11:01
Speaker 3: called the Prism is we are a structure and we're
11:03
Speaker 3: in a material world with structures. Even relationships have a structure,
11:09
Speaker 3: all dynamics have a structure, and it is really important
11:15
Speaker 3: to begin to engage in interfacing with that structure differently.
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Speaker 3: And it's a tiny change, you know, big changes really
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Speaker 3: kind of just make messes because we're so complex and
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Speaker 3: we're connected to everything. So you make a tiny change.
11:32
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know if your refrigerator has ever
11:35
Speaker 3: gone down two degrees, but there's some things that just don't.
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Speaker 2: Survive, it's true.
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Speaker 3: And so it's really important to have your goals. You
11:46
Speaker 3: don't have to believe in them. I mean belief is
11:48
Speaker 3: the big mind f You don't have to believe in everything.
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Speaker 3: It doesn't have to feel good.
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Speaker 2: That's interesting, Oh.
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Speaker 3: I think that is such a bad marker. How something
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Speaker 3: feels I mean, hero feels good. I'm going through your
12:03
Speaker 3: old patterns, even if when they're painful, often feels really good.
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Speaker 1: Okay, But here's my question, because I hear a lot
12:10
Speaker 1: of people that our great manifestors talk about how you
12:16
Speaker 1: don't really attract what you want. You attract who you
12:19
Speaker 1: are and the vibration you're giving out. If you say
12:23
Speaker 1: that my goal is to be one of the biggest
12:25
Speaker 1: podcasters in the country.
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Speaker 2: But I'm not living there, I'm not feeling it.
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Speaker 1: If I don't believe it yet, how am I going
12:32
Speaker 1: to be able to achieve it?
12:34
Speaker 2: What's the disconnect?
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Speaker 3: Nothing to do with achievement, you know. One of the
12:38
Speaker 3: reasons that I write self help is that you again
12:42
Speaker 3: can't think outside the box. You are the box. But
12:45
Speaker 3: when you try what someone else who has done something
12:49
Speaker 3: successful is on, often you find a key that works
12:54
Speaker 3: for you. Not all of those keys, because we're a
12:57
Speaker 3: unique but you find a key that works for you.
13:00
Speaker 3: So if you want to be the most successful podcaster.
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Speaker 3: I would both listen to successful podcasters and ones that
13:09
Speaker 3: have really messed up. I would try on things that
13:12
Speaker 3: are uncomfortable but not dangerous or no new damage damaged
13:17
Speaker 3: is just wasted time, wasted energy. We all planted how
13:21
Speaker 3: at our prism, at our structure, but the wonderful thing
13:25
Speaker 3: is we are always growing. One of the things that
13:29
Speaker 3: I see so much of my workshops is initially people
13:33
Speaker 3: are doing that somebody nobody thing at a person so
13:35
Speaker 3: on that's no one. The reality is we are all one,
13:40
Speaker 3: and it may be the person who is literally the
13:45
Speaker 3: last person you consider who has your answer. The important
13:49
Speaker 3: thing to realize is your answer, and it's really big
13:52
Speaker 3: now to look at your trauma. Find your trauma, believe me,
13:56
Speaker 3: go for something that you want that's bigger than any
14:00
Speaker 3: you've ever achieved. Your trauma is the first person to
14:02
Speaker 3: the party canavoid it. So I don't believe in positive thinking,
14:07
Speaker 3: because if a bullet's coming out you, it will definitely
14:09
Speaker 3: hit you notice it. You need to know the action,
14:13
Speaker 3: and then you need to take the action. You need
14:15
Speaker 3: to do those three things. And I know threes are
14:19
Speaker 3: mystical numbers. People like to mystify. Everything is demagicalize. You're
14:24
Speaker 3: your magic wand you think, you do, you connect, you create,
14:30
Speaker 3: you choose. There is nothing more magic than you. And
14:34
Speaker 3: I think that we really underestimate how much courage it
14:37
Speaker 3: takes to be alive, to be a human being, to
14:42
Speaker 3: invest in relationships. I mean, I know, I wake up
14:45
Speaker 3: every morning because of all the deaths so early in
14:48
Speaker 3: my life, and I just make sure my husband's breathing,
14:51
Speaker 3: and if his breathing, that is a good day.
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Speaker 1: I love that you mentioned noticing an action. Any positive
14:57
Speaker 1: stride I have made has been from noticing.
15:01
Speaker 2: That is the first step in therapy.
15:03
Speaker 3: And also not avoiding your obstacles. I mean, you don't
15:07
Speaker 3: see what you don't see, and you will. I walk
15:09
Speaker 3: into walls and I've written seven very successful self help books,
15:12
Speaker 3: but I still walk into new walls because I'm going
15:15
Speaker 3: and every time I grow, they are new things I
15:18
Speaker 3: can't do. There were medial tasks. They are new obstacles
15:23
Speaker 3: that I didn't know. Oh wow, I thought I solved
15:25
Speaker 3: that forty years ago, and yeah, here it is just
15:28
Speaker 3: dressed up differently. And the fact of the matter is
15:32
Speaker 3: if you engage in empowered realistic thinking and if you
15:37
Speaker 3: try things on from outside of yourself that are uncomfortable. Again,
15:42
Speaker 3: that's why I write self help, and that's why intuition
15:45
Speaker 3: is so important. You will make those changes. You will
15:49
Speaker 3: get there. Part of the problem is everyone's always looking
15:51
Speaker 3: for a sign. You don't need a sign if you
15:54
Speaker 3: decide if you're determined, and then if you're flexible, and
15:59
Speaker 3: the person takes a lot about the ego, you know
16:01
Speaker 3: determination isn't going to do it. You're still in the box. Yeah,
16:05
Speaker 3: be determined, you need to be flexible, and you need
16:08
Speaker 3: to be resilient because if you're doing something great, you
16:12
Speaker 3: will get knocked on your bottom.
16:14
Speaker 1: I want to dive deeper into the prism because I
16:16
Speaker 1: think we keep mentioning it. It's the system that you've
16:19
Speaker 1: come up with that you're sharing in the book. It's
16:21
Speaker 1: also the name of the book. But how do you
16:23
Speaker 1: describe what the prism is?
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Speaker 3: The prism is your ego. The ego gets a bad name,
16:28
Speaker 3: but you do have genetics that form you and how
16:32
Speaker 3: you respond to the world. And how you respond to
16:35
Speaker 3: the world is both the world you perceive, so you
16:38
Speaker 3: may not see the whole world here and miss all that,
16:40
Speaker 3: but it's also how you interact so you're born with
16:45
Speaker 3: a certain structure, but then the ego, so the I want,
16:49
Speaker 3: I believe, I am, I see, I interact. Anything with
16:53
Speaker 3: an eye is formed between conception and age seven, and
16:57
Speaker 3: then you're locked and loaded and the rest is vision.
17:01
Speaker 3: And one of the things that I realized when I
17:04
Speaker 3: was really downloading this, you know, some of my books
17:07
Speaker 3: I write there based on my experience. All the intuition
17:11
Speaker 3: books were based on the scientific testing on me as
17:16
Speaker 3: an intuitive.
17:16
Speaker 2: What is scientific testing on you? What does that mean?
17:19
Speaker 3: So back in the early eighties, there was a lot
17:22
Speaker 3: of interest in the extended capacities of the human mind,
17:26
Speaker 3: mostly for remote viewing for military purposes, although that's not
17:29
Speaker 3: what we knew, and there were many of us. I'm
17:32
Speaker 3: not unique, and so my first books were based on
17:36
Speaker 3: those tests, you know, making the tests into training. That's
17:39
Speaker 3: how I was trained, not through the esoteric community, but
17:42
Speaker 3: through the scientific community. And it was great training because
17:45
Speaker 3: you're either right or you're wrong. There's none of this
17:48
Speaker 3: kind of murky stuff.
17:49
Speaker 2: You're really into metrics and verifiable results.
17:52
Speaker 3: You know, the subconscious belief doesn't work. I mean, it
17:56
Speaker 3: works for a while until you get something that disproves it.
18:00
Speaker 3: But your subconscious is looking for will this help me survive?
18:04
Speaker 3: And if it will use it, and if it won't,
18:07
Speaker 3: it goes back to its old patterns. So it's really
18:10
Speaker 3: both important for you to have access to yourself and
18:14
Speaker 3: your abilities to prove it to yourself in the real world.
18:18
Speaker 3: But it's also important because belief is risky business. You know,
18:22
Speaker 3: people believe they can fly and you can die that way.
18:25
Speaker 3: You really need to have again a prism, a structure
18:31
Speaker 3: where you can reality test and use things that work
18:36
Speaker 3: time and time again, which doesn't mean everything will be perfect.
18:40
Speaker 3: You know, how I know I've achieved something is I'm
18:42
Speaker 3: worried about something new.
18:44
Speaker 1: Yes, that's a great point, and I have to tell
18:46
Speaker 1: you it's very rare. I think for anybody nowadays that
18:51
Speaker 1: somebody's mind is really changed by a book and idea
18:55
Speaker 1: a person. You completely changed my mind with this book
18:58
Speaker 1: because I had always that ego is the enemy, that
19:02
Speaker 1: your ego is what's getting in the way of prosperity,
19:07
Speaker 1: of love, of all the goodness in your life and
19:09
Speaker 1: your light right, and you outline these seven ego centers,
19:13
Speaker 1: which are based on the chakra system, but you kind
19:15
Speaker 1: of reframe them as psychological development stages, and I had
19:20
Speaker 1: been under the impression that the ego is the enemy.
19:23
Speaker 1: You say, it's the prism, So it's the channel through
19:26
Speaker 1: which our reality is created.
19:28
Speaker 2: It's not the problem, but the processor.
19:30
Speaker 3: When people say ego, they're speaking about injured ego. You know,
19:35
Speaker 3: ego that wasn't put together well, and so that creates
19:39
Speaker 3: and attacks the world around us. What your prism or
19:43
Speaker 3: ego actually does, you know, we're all into spirituality, but
19:47
Speaker 3: we are in bodies in a physical world. That's what
19:50
Speaker 3: we're here to master. What the prism does, or the
19:53
Speaker 3: ego does, is it takes that energy we share. Because
19:57
Speaker 3: if you're just one perfect energy, you're not evolving and
20:01
Speaker 3: you're not creating. You don't need to. We create. Your
20:06
Speaker 3: ego creates, your eye creates, but you create the way
20:11
Speaker 3: you were raised those first seven years. And the wonderful
20:15
Speaker 3: thing about being even ten, but certainly about being an adult,
20:20
Speaker 3: is then you begin to choose, and you begin to
20:23
Speaker 3: be in the world. And even if you're not seeing
20:26
Speaker 3: what you don't see, catalysts come and they push you,
20:31
Speaker 3: and then you have a choice to either reconstitute in
20:35
Speaker 3: an old way or say this is what I want
20:40
Speaker 3: and try something new. So at the prism is the
20:43
Speaker 3: ideal development for you and for you to now be
20:48
Speaker 3: the healer for yourself with tiny little changes. You know
20:53
Speaker 3: what should have happened, you know, at your first ego center,
20:56
Speaker 3: you should have felt safe and supported. You should have
21:00
Speaker 3: been able to embrace discipline without it feeling overwhelming. You know,
21:05
Speaker 3: there are things that needed to happen when you were
21:09
Speaker 3: a child for you to form a sense of the
21:13
Speaker 3: world where you could have power in it. And if
21:16
Speaker 3: those didn't form for whatever reasons. You know, it's not
21:21
Speaker 3: always that someone did something malicious. You know. Sometimes people
21:25
Speaker 3: were just like my mother was ill, you know, my manic,
21:29
Speaker 3: depressive and suicidal. You know, sometimes it's just because you
21:33
Speaker 3: are born into a very defective environment. One of the
21:37
Speaker 3: things that I really realized, just because I had the
21:42
Speaker 3: opportunity for the last ten years to do this system
21:46
Speaker 3: with thousands of students, and what I realized is even
21:49
Speaker 3: if they were born in a combat zone, if they
21:54
Speaker 3: had one adult who provided a solidure as them and
22:01
Speaker 3: that adult anything around that really didn't matter.
22:06
Speaker 2: Yeah. I've heard that before, that you just need one
22:08
Speaker 2: adult to say I love you and I believe in you,
22:10
Speaker 2: they know, and.
22:12
Speaker 3: To say, ah, this is the way we do it,
22:15
Speaker 3: and to show you how to go out into the
22:17
Speaker 3: world in a way that the world cooperates and you
22:20
Speaker 3: need more than I love you. You know. That was
22:23
Speaker 3: very much my generation the sixties, where yeah, you know,
22:26
Speaker 3: love and adore your children no, because you know what,
22:29
Speaker 3: unless you give them a good structure, the world isn't
22:32
Speaker 3: going to love and adore your children, and you're guaranteeing
22:35
Speaker 3: them a miserable experience. So hair takers have really big jobs.
22:41
Speaker 3: And of course telepathy is a real thing, and there
22:44
Speaker 3: are so much research on telepathy and on how unfortunately
22:49
Speaker 3: we are in constant communication with the world around us
22:52
Speaker 3: and it with us. And one of the things that
22:55
Speaker 3: is so important is that children pick up what you experience.
23:00
Speaker 3: You know, good housekeeping is number one.
23:02
Speaker 1: Everybody on this podcast is going to laugh because I
23:05
Speaker 1: say this quote probably every other episode. But my mom
23:08
Speaker 1: has this phrase that lessons are caught, not taught, in parenthood.
23:12
Speaker 1: It seems to be so true, I think, and I
23:14
Speaker 1: try not to use the word I in interviews, but
23:16
Speaker 1: I'm going to give this as an example just so
23:18
Speaker 1: we can pick it apart. I think I was operating
23:21
Speaker 1: from a cracked prism or cracked ego for a while
23:25
Speaker 1: in my twenties, and I probably still am, but I've
23:29
Speaker 1: done a lot more noticing. One of the things that
23:32
Speaker 1: I learned from therapy was that even though I grew
23:35
Speaker 1: up with a pretty great nuclear family structure, it seemed
23:40
Speaker 1: like my emotional needs were not always met, and so
23:43
Speaker 1: that has permeated, I think the rest of my life.
23:46
Speaker 1: It's something that I actively work on, and before therapy
23:51
Speaker 1: I was not noticing. How do we know when our
23:54
Speaker 1: prism is cracked?
23:55
Speaker 2: Like I would love for everybody to walk away from
23:58
Speaker 2: this conversation reckg something What.
24:01
Speaker 3: Isn't working in your life? You know, once again, when
24:03
Speaker 3: you're looking at what happened to you, that's murky subjective.
24:08
Speaker 3: Are you making enough money? Are you doing something you love?
24:11
Speaker 3: Are you well partnered if you want to be partnered?
24:14
Speaker 3: Is your body healthy? Are you acknowledged? Is your life peaceful?
24:19
Speaker 3: Or are there all these things that you know go
24:22
Speaker 3: wrong out of left field? I think one of the
24:25
Speaker 3: failings of therapy, although you know I love therapy too,
24:28
Speaker 3: but one of the failings of therapy. Even though a
24:32
Speaker 3: good therapist is a catalyst, so does challenge your old prism.
24:37
Speaker 3: One of the failings is we're looking back at things
24:41
Speaker 3: for understanding and actually have experienced teaching that understanding comes
24:48
Speaker 3: from doing something different in the world and getting a
24:51
Speaker 3: different result from the world, and that the best thing
24:54
Speaker 3: to heal is getting exactly what you want. It is amazing. Wow,
25:00
Speaker 3: these is go away when the person finally falls in
25:03
Speaker 3: love or finally sells their art and becomes successful, or
25:08
Speaker 3: you know, we've been taught by an era that it's
25:13
Speaker 3: important to understand, and actually understanding is overrated. It's important
25:19
Speaker 3: to do something differently, notice that you get a different result,
25:25
Speaker 3: and then if that works for you, do it in
25:28
Speaker 3: all the areas that are important. And one of the
25:31
Speaker 3: wonderful things about being a human being and being an
25:34
Speaker 3: animal world because the world has you know, like gravity,
25:38
Speaker 3: they're rules. They are rules to being. There are rules
25:40
Speaker 3: to the world. They're not esoteric rules, they're really physical rules.
25:44
Speaker 3: And one of the great things is if you're able
25:47
Speaker 3: finally to get your value for your work, that's forth
25:52
Speaker 3: ego center, it's value. You'll be able to do that
25:55
Speaker 3: in love, You'll be able to do that for yourself.
25:59
Speaker 3: You'll be able to do that when choosing a property.
26:02
Speaker 3: One problem solved at an ego center solves that problem
26:08
Speaker 3: in all the rest of your life.
26:09
Speaker 2: So are because you feel confident.
26:11
Speaker 3: No, it's not about feeling, because you repattern what you do.
26:16
Speaker 3: If you don't know a door opens, you will never
26:20
Speaker 3: try to open a door. So you create these new
26:23
Speaker 3: receptors that you didn't have. And even people with wonderful
26:29
Speaker 3: early childhood ego development struggle because they often want to
26:36
Speaker 3: achieve more. When you achieve more, you have to adapt
26:41
Speaker 3: to new circumstances. The difference between having healthy early development
26:46
Speaker 3: and unhealthy early development is that if you had healthy
26:50
Speaker 3: early development, chances are you can not that it's not hard,
26:54
Speaker 3: not that you don't make mistakes, not that sometimes things
26:57
Speaker 3: fall apart, but that basically what it is you perceive
27:01
Speaker 3: and want you achieve. Whereas someone who doesn't have healthy
27:05
Speaker 3: ego development usually has at least one or two sinkholes
27:10
Speaker 3: in their life. Even if they have survived by focusing
27:14
Speaker 3: on career or focusing on a relationship, they usually have
27:17
Speaker 3: some sinkholes. And one of the most wonderful things on
27:21
Speaker 3: Instagram we do one element of the prism together as
27:25
Speaker 3: a group, and we do readings for each other and healing.
27:28
Speaker 3: And one of the wonderful things is that you really
27:30
Speaker 3: do completely change your external world. You know your internal
27:35
Speaker 3: world too, But I really almost want to say, you
27:38
Speaker 3: know what, stop looking at your belly button. What is
27:42
Speaker 3: it you want in the world. It's okay to want.
27:48
Speaker 3: Only an ego can create. Spirit doesn't create its energy.
27:52
Speaker 3: You know, energy can turn on a light bulb. You know.
27:56
Speaker 3: Energy also, if you wet your finger put it in
27:59
Speaker 3: a live socket, can electrocute you. It doesn't have any
28:02
Speaker 3: quality of its own. It's how you channel it. And
28:05
Speaker 3: so the prison is, how do you want to channel
28:08
Speaker 3: energy in the world? What do you want to create?
28:11
Speaker 3: Because you can create it, you don't have to believe
28:13
Speaker 3: in it. It doesn't have to feel good, it doesn't
28:16
Speaker 3: have to be good. There's this thing about worthiness. I
28:19
Speaker 3: feel that I'm worthy of love. Who made a worthiness rule?
28:23
Speaker 3: I mean, look at all the hideous people who've achieved
28:26
Speaker 3: amazing things. There's no worthiness rule. If you want it,
28:30
Speaker 3: there's a system to get it. You are that system,
28:33
Speaker 3: and that is the person.
28:34
Speaker 1: Okay, So I'm now placing a few parts of your
28:37
Speaker 1: work together because you've consulted for billion dollar companies. You've
28:41
Speaker 1: helped a lot of executives tap into decision making insights
28:45
Speaker 1: that logic alone probably can't provide. I've heard it called
28:49
Speaker 1: strategic forecasting. You've helped people with hiring decisions, product development,
28:54
Speaker 1: creative direction, even crisis management. Why do you think these
28:58
Speaker 1: high performers are so interested in intuition?
29:01
Speaker 2: Is it that wanting that you're talking about.
29:03
Speaker 3: No, I mean, first of all, the companies I work for,
29:07
Speaker 3: it's not that they want to learn. I predict the
29:09
Speaker 3: future for them. That's my day job. That's how companies
29:13
Speaker 3: who hire me to go in and train their people.
29:16
Speaker 3: They're interested because it's correct data. And the problem with
29:21
Speaker 3: hiring a consultant who is not an intuitive consultant is
29:26
Speaker 3: that consultants using the same data everyone else has, whereas
29:30
Speaker 3: intuition gives you out of the blue information about the
29:33
Speaker 3: future about other people. For example, you're building a building
29:38
Speaker 3: in a hot neighborhood. What you don't realize is flooding
29:42
Speaker 3: is going to become a problem and that neighborhood that
29:45
Speaker 3: you know half billion dollar project is going to tank.
29:49
Speaker 3: So you can't do that except with precognition, with being
29:54
Speaker 3: able to tell the future. So companies hire me to
29:56
Speaker 3: tell the future, and often my students want that two.
30:00
Speaker 3: That is sixth the ego center. It's connected to intellect,
30:04
Speaker 3: it's connected to observation. But your intuition gives you data.
30:08
Speaker 3: It says this is what's going to happen. So they
30:11
Speaker 3: hire me to tell them what's ahead so that they
30:15
Speaker 3: can move the pieces.
30:16
Speaker 1: Now, can you help clear something up. I've never understood
30:20
Speaker 1: about intuitive So talk to me about the amount of
30:24
Speaker 1: free will that changes the premonition or the future casting.
30:29
Speaker 3: That's a really great question, and it is one that
30:33
Speaker 3: over six and a half decades I have really proven
30:38
Speaker 3: beyond a shadow of a doubt, we do have choice.
30:42
Speaker 3: We can change almost everything. I mean, when I was young, genetics,
30:46
Speaker 3: you were born, Your genetics were what they were. You
30:49
Speaker 3: were stuck with them. I never experienced that, and luckily
30:54
Speaker 3: neither did a bunch of scientists who now see that, Oh, actually, epigenetics,
30:58
Speaker 3: your genes change with your experience and beliefs and efforts,
31:02
Speaker 3: and you know your environment, and those changes not just you.
31:06
Speaker 3: They're passed down then to future generations. So we are
31:11
Speaker 3: all free will. That is what the prism is. That's
31:14
Speaker 3: what ego is. However, and big. However, mammals are not
31:19
Speaker 3: made to change, especially not quickly, you know, and change
31:24
Speaker 3: always brings in new risks. So we have again our beliefs,
31:31
Speaker 3: all made before we could reason, before we were seven.
31:34
Speaker 3: You know, our beliefs, our experiences. I learned to walk
31:38
Speaker 3: on my own, and mommy leaves and brings home another
31:42
Speaker 3: baby and replaces me that baby unless they have a
31:47
Speaker 3: really good support in their parenting. That baby then equates
31:53
Speaker 3: autonomy with abandonment and messes up many areas of their life.
31:58
Speaker 3: So we have so many patterns. Very little of that
32:01
Speaker 3: is conscious, which is why it's so helpful to have goals.
32:06
Speaker 3: You know, people say goals are so not spiritual. Making
32:09
Speaker 3: a lot of money is in spiritual, having great times
32:11
Speaker 3: in spiritual, being able to have beautiful houses and spiritual,
32:14
Speaker 3: Well why isn't it? I mean, matter is spirit. If
32:18
Speaker 3: you believe that everything's energy, then your ability to create
32:24
Speaker 3: is not only so spiritual, but so human. You've learned
32:29
Speaker 3: how to work the machine and often you know, the
32:33
Speaker 3: billionaires who don't share are ego damaged. But by and large,
32:39
Speaker 3: if you look around, people who feel that they can
32:44
Speaker 3: create what they want create for others.
32:48
Speaker 2: That's a really beautiful statement. I agree with you.
32:50
Speaker 1: I've heard you talk a lot about your brain in
32:52
Speaker 1: other podcasts from like twenty twenty twenty twenty two, you
32:56
Speaker 1: mentioned that you have ADHD or add.
32:59
Speaker 3: ADHD, and I have really severe you know, recently, not recently,
33:03
Speaker 3: about eight years ago, I did a new neuropsychoval which
33:07
Speaker 3: is two days of neurological testing and psychological testing. And
33:12
Speaker 3: she looked at me and she said, I'm amazed you
33:13
Speaker 3: can cross the street.
33:15
Speaker 2: Wow.
33:15
Speaker 3: And I did it because at my age, if I
33:18
Speaker 3: go in and I don't know what year it is
33:19
Speaker 3: and I don't know what city it is, they think
33:21
Speaker 3: dementia and not ADHD. But I was that way at
33:24
Speaker 3: eleven or at five. So the damaged for lack of
33:30
Speaker 3: a better word, brain, And you know, I think that
33:33
Speaker 3: in a way, kind of normalizing all of these different neurologies,
33:38
Speaker 3: it can be wonderful and it can also not be
33:40
Speaker 3: helpful because it's just like lefties die more easily because
33:44
Speaker 3: it's a right handed world. You are challenged when you're
33:48
Speaker 3: a little bit outside, but especially when you're a lot
33:51
Speaker 3: outside of the norm. However, the brain that doesn't have
33:55
Speaker 3: executive function, that doesn't place itself, is wonderful at moving
33:59
Speaker 3: in time and space. And I would love an educational
34:04
Speaker 3: system that actually evaluated children for their strengths, encourage their strengths,
34:11
Speaker 3: but then also looked at their passions. Because intuition is
34:15
Speaker 3: not my passion. It's my strength.
34:17
Speaker 2: What's your passion?
34:18
Speaker 3: My passion is writing, okay, and my passion is community.
34:23
Speaker 3: I love teaching. Every book I write as a textbook.
34:26
Speaker 3: I write as a book that people will go into the.
34:28
Speaker 2: World, and because that makes sense.
34:30
Speaker 3: Practitioners and teach My passion is community. My husband says,
34:35
Speaker 3: I can make a party out of anything, and it's
34:37
Speaker 3: funny because I'm an incredible introvert. So it would be
34:40
Speaker 3: wonderful if our educational systems said, okay, here are strengths.
34:43
Speaker 3: Because the strength was never going to be memorization. You know,
34:46
Speaker 3: I couldn't for the life of me remember the periodic tables.
34:50
Speaker 3: But my strength was being able to find something in
34:55
Speaker 3: a mathematical equation without going through the steps. For example,
35:00
Speaker 3: the wormhole this reality and this reality, you know, or
35:03
Speaker 3: between where we are now and the goal. And I
35:06
Speaker 3: often have my students do a healing where they create
35:09
Speaker 3: a wormhole where this hand is where they are now, okay,
35:13
Speaker 3: And where this hand is where they want to go,
35:15
Speaker 3: And the space between is actually all the healings, all
35:19
Speaker 3: the things in the world, and all the things in
35:21
Speaker 3: themselves that need to shift. And then I have them
35:24
Speaker 3: suspend the illusion of separateness, because separateness is an illusion,
35:28
Speaker 3: and bring the present and the desired future together, And
35:33
Speaker 3: I say, don't be rigid about this. You may want
35:35
Speaker 3: to take your hands, you may want to move, you
35:38
Speaker 3: may want to put air between do whatever it is
35:42
Speaker 3: you are led to do, be fully both in the
35:45
Speaker 3: present and in that desired future, without having to see
35:48
Speaker 3: it or know it. And then when their hands come together,
35:51
Speaker 3: the healing is done. And I have them take the
35:53
Speaker 3: hand of the person who got them there, because we
35:56
Speaker 3: forget we do a lot for ourselves.
35:58
Speaker 1: I took a form of a time class a few
36:01
Speaker 1: years ago, and you can actually feel the energy, beat,
36:04
Speaker 1: the heat and the energy between your hands if you
36:06
Speaker 1: hold them close or with anybody else's.
36:08
Speaker 2: So that's powerful, I think.
36:09
Speaker 3: And what's really interesting is if you teach a form
36:12
Speaker 3: of healing, and if you go over someone's body, you'll
36:14
Speaker 3: see some places you can bring your hands close, and
36:17
Speaker 3: some of them. The energy is really far away. Yes,
36:20
Speaker 3: you know how to balance. We are all intuitives, we
36:23
Speaker 3: are all healers, and we're really all catalysts for one another.
36:29
Speaker 3: You know. One of the things I really love about
36:31
Speaker 3: my students, and I saw this during COVID, where people
36:34
Speaker 3: were amazing. They were paying each other's rents, they were
36:37
Speaker 3: bringing medicine, you know, first responders, We're bringing things, you know,
36:41
Speaker 3: finding diapers for baby. I mean, it was just they
36:44
Speaker 3: were an amazing group, but we are not separate. So
36:48
Speaker 3: when you suspend that illusion, what happens is you begin
36:51
Speaker 3: to know ways to work and channel that togetherness. Yeah,
36:56
Speaker 3: and that's so powerful to be able to do, and
37:00
Speaker 3: it makes strangers friends.
37:03
Speaker 1: So much of your work is about self and self work.
37:06
Speaker 1: And then I'm now hearing you have this real passion
37:09
Speaker 1: for togetherness and community. How do they work in tangent
37:12
Speaker 1: with each other in terms of healing.
37:14
Speaker 3: I'm my own worst healer and I'm my own worst
37:17
Speaker 3: intuitive because I also am my own pattern. I need
37:22
Speaker 3: other people to challenge me, to reveal things to me,
37:28
Speaker 3: to be examples for me. And I really love it
37:33
Speaker 3: when people come together, especially with the intention of everyone
37:38
Speaker 3: being raised up.
37:40
Speaker 1: Well, you wrote that every one of us was a
37:43
Speaker 1: wee before we became an eye, and so there is
37:45
Speaker 1: sort of this collective origin. Pardon but you cite it,
37:49
Speaker 1: and I think it's like the idea of collective origin
37:52
Speaker 1: is interesting.
37:53
Speaker 3: Well, I mean also just structurally and psychologically, when you're born,
37:59
Speaker 3: you have needs, but you don't have a sense of
38:02
Speaker 3: self apart from your environment. And psychologists see this from
38:07
Speaker 3: children's art, that they don't have a sense that mommy
38:10
Speaker 3: is separate from me, or the toy is separate from me.
38:14
Speaker 3: And actually, you know, when they're potty training sometimes it's
38:17
Speaker 3: really scary because they see something separate from them. So
38:22
Speaker 3: the sense of separateness is a very important thing we
38:25
Speaker 3: acquire because of course, if you're not separate, you cannot
38:29
Speaker 3: be in relationship because you're not separate, and you can't
38:34
Speaker 3: have impact on anything because you're not separate. So that separateness,
38:39
Speaker 3: that individuation, is such an important part of being able
38:43
Speaker 3: to create in the world. And we all do create
38:47
Speaker 3: in the world, but when we create together, we really
38:51
Speaker 3: mirror the energetic reality that we are one. And now
38:55
Speaker 3: this is science. It was spirituality and parapsychology when I
38:59
Speaker 3: was young in the sixties, but now we've measured it.
39:03
Speaker 3: Now we've quantified it. So we want to be separate
39:07
Speaker 3: from that oneness, at least for the time that we
39:10
Speaker 3: are in a body, because we can't create merge, we
39:15
Speaker 3: can't relate merge, and that separateness is really hard. It's
39:21
Speaker 3: hard to be an eye and it's hard to be
39:24
Speaker 3: an eye in a world that we will never completely understand,
39:31
Speaker 3: which is why taking an action. And the prism is
39:34
Speaker 3: full of actions. It says, try this tiny thing today,
39:39
Speaker 3: or here's a thought experiment just for today, tiny little thing,
39:43
Speaker 3: and notice what changes in your external world, because in
39:49
Speaker 3: your internal world is too subjective. You don't know.
39:52
Speaker 1: There's this one part of the ego center that you
39:55
Speaker 1: call functional vulnerability.
39:56
Speaker 2: Am I getting that correct?
39:58
Speaker 3: There is always aulnerability. Every ego center has a vulnerability.
40:02
Speaker 3: So we are doing the third ego center, which is
40:05
Speaker 3: your diaphragm. Vulnerability is powerlessness.
40:10
Speaker 2: And you said that one's always a little shaky.
40:13
Speaker 3: Well, no, the polarity.
40:15
Speaker 2: Okay, I think I'm misunderstanding. Yes, you can put your
40:18
Speaker 2: professor hat on, please teach me.
40:20
Speaker 3: I'm going to give you an example of what we're
40:22
Speaker 3: working on. Every part of you has a vulnerability, just
40:28
Speaker 3: like every part of you has a strength. Right, So
40:33
Speaker 3: the vulnerability of your drive is the powerlessness you feel
40:38
Speaker 3: when you drive and the world doesn't cooperate with you.
40:41
Speaker 3: The polarity of that is you know, of course we
40:45
Speaker 3: want to drive forward, but learning when to surrender, not
40:49
Speaker 3: because it's a spiritual thing to do, but because you
40:52
Speaker 3: can push that wall as much as you want, it's
40:55
Speaker 3: not going to move. You've got to find another way.
40:58
Speaker 3: So the functional vulnerability is where, because of what it is,
41:04
Speaker 3: it's challenged in a certain way. Our feeling of value
41:08
Speaker 3: and our value in the world is constantly challenged by
41:13
Speaker 3: our sense of worth, and so in a way, our
41:18
Speaker 3: vulnerability is something that we have to accept. You know,
41:21
Speaker 3: there's people who always have to feel powerful and in control.
41:24
Speaker 3: We all know those, right, those bombastic walkover people. You
41:29
Speaker 3: don't want to be next to them at a dinner
41:31
Speaker 3: party or you know, in front of them in line
41:34
Speaker 3: at a Starbucks, and they're not functional. You want to
41:38
Speaker 3: be able to say, Okay, this is the vulnerability here.
41:43
Speaker 3: When I accept that, I'm able to work through the strength.
41:48
Speaker 2: So what do you think the cost of not recognizing
41:52
Speaker 2: this is like, what is the cost of not doing
41:56
Speaker 2: the work?
41:56
Speaker 3: It depends how damaged your life is. And you know that.
42:00
Speaker 3: By your life, I mean if you're well partnered, if
42:03
Speaker 3: you are successful, if you're doing something you love, if
42:06
Speaker 3: you've built the community and family you want, if you
42:08
Speaker 3: love where you live, if you're healthy, then no cost
42:13
Speaker 3: until something challenges you. Still, if you've been structured well
42:18
Speaker 3: in your early life, there's probably no cost. But if
42:21
Speaker 3: there are things in your life, especially things that chronically
42:25
Speaker 3: don't work out, like your relationship, you know, you don't
42:29
Speaker 3: quite ever have that or I work a lot with actors.
42:32
Speaker 3: Those actors who stay on the plateau, they don't fall off,
42:37
Speaker 3: but they never really get you know, and they're not
42:40
Speaker 3: happy there. Some people are happy there, you know, but
42:43
Speaker 3: they're not happy there. If you are not creating, if
42:47
Speaker 3: you're not able to create what it is you want
42:49
Speaker 3: to create, that's the cost of not working on your prism.
42:54
Speaker 3: And we are taught to manage our intellect over a
42:58
Speaker 3: lifetime to our emotions over a lifetime. In a way,
43:02
Speaker 3: therapy just does more of what you were taught by
43:05
Speaker 3: your parents in a nursery school. We're not taught to
43:09
Speaker 3: manage our intuition. We're not taught to manage the fact
43:13
Speaker 3: that if you are arguing with your boss in your head,
43:18
Speaker 3: why wonder why they're defensive or why they're not attracted
43:22
Speaker 3: to you, or you're creating that. And when you're aware
43:27
Speaker 3: of the non local, when you're aware of the intuitive,
43:31
Speaker 3: when you are aware that you're afraid of a future
43:34
Speaker 3: that you can change right now, when you're aware that
43:38
Speaker 3: you can use intuition to really experience another person's prism
43:42
Speaker 3: what they want. You know, we all think everybody wants
43:45
Speaker 3: what we want, and actually everyone doesn't want what we want.
43:48
Speaker 3: Everyone is incredibly unique, Like, not everybody wants companionship. For me,
43:54
Speaker 3: that's unbelievable that everyone doesn't want companionship, you know, if
43:58
Speaker 3: they're alone, Wow, But actually everyone doesn't. Some people just
44:02
Speaker 3: want closet space and freedom and not being tied down
44:05
Speaker 3: or responsible.
44:06
Speaker 1: Or account I have the opposite question, which is what
44:09
Speaker 1: do you want people to know about the version of
44:12
Speaker 1: themselves on the other side of some of this prison work.
44:15
Speaker 3: First of all, what you fantasize that you want to be,
44:19
Speaker 3: you really can be. It's never the way you fantasize
44:22
Speaker 3: it because you're fantasizing from the past. You're fantasizing from
44:26
Speaker 3: an old paradigm, but the experience of what you want
44:31
Speaker 3: is available to you. And it's part of what I
44:33
Speaker 3: don't like about visualization. Again, you visualize what you want,
44:37
Speaker 3: which maybe once you were given. It's funny my husband
44:41
Speaker 3: said to me a couple of years ago, he said,
44:43
Speaker 3: you really love like cooking and serving everybody, And I'm like, no,
44:49
Speaker 3: I don't. Actually I do it because I want the
44:53
Speaker 3: people around me to feel safe and comfortable and nourished,
44:58
Speaker 3: but I don't enjoy doing it. And it completely changed
45:02
Speaker 3: the prism of our relationship because now I do mourning
45:06
Speaker 3: because I'm a morning person and he does night and
45:10
Speaker 3: so now I have a relationship that actually allows me
45:14
Speaker 3: to do a lot for myself that I wouldn't ever
45:17
Speaker 3: really have permitted myself. I did have a goal, and
45:21
Speaker 3: the goal was to get this book done. I mean,
45:25
Speaker 3: most of my other books I had to write very quickly.
45:28
Speaker 3: I had fifteen years to test this out on thousands
45:32
Speaker 3: of people and to really enjoy it. And then I
45:35
Speaker 3: found the perfect publisher to publish it. This is costly
45:39
Speaker 3: for a publisher. They did a beautiful job.
45:41
Speaker 1: You also had one of the best book publicists I've
45:43
Speaker 1: ever worked with.
45:45
Speaker 3: Oh I love Sarah Hall.
45:47
Speaker 2: It was air Donna, Yes, yr Denya.
45:50
Speaker 3: But she works with Sarah Hall. Amazing publicists. They are lovely,
45:55
Speaker 3: really lovely good people. And I have to say that
45:58
Speaker 3: Sarah had you know, even when I'm not writing, I
46:02
Speaker 3: still want a community. So Sarah has really been with
46:06
Speaker 3: me through all of the iterations of my career. You know,
46:10
Speaker 3: I've been closing, and I've been kind of, you know,
46:14
Speaker 3: under the radar, and then the hottest thing again. You know,
46:16
Speaker 3: we all have our pond slime and then we're stars.
46:19
Speaker 3: And it's wonderful that it goes up and down, because
46:22
Speaker 3: if it were always up, it would be very exhausting.
46:25
Speaker 1: Do you ever work with intuitives when you feel like
46:28
Speaker 1: you can't figure something out.
46:30
Speaker 3: All the time? You do? I train intuitives, So I
46:34
Speaker 3: do something called boot camp, and I don't take clients.
46:38
Speaker 3: I work with four companies and that's it. The rest
46:41
Speaker 3: of the time. I read my students in workshops or
46:44
Speaker 3: I read them on my lives, on my Instagram lives.
46:48
Speaker 3: But one of the wonderful things about training intuitives is
46:52
Speaker 3: that I get amazing readings. I mean, I just had
46:56
Speaker 3: an intuitive that I trained this morning. That's something I'm
46:59
Speaker 3: trying to figure out. We're working on the third Eco Center,
47:02
Speaker 3: which is about manifestation. I manifested something I wanted for years,
47:07
Speaker 3: but now I have to decide if I really wanted
47:09
Speaker 3: or not, which I didn't really investigate as much as
47:11
Speaker 3: maybe I should. And so even though now she's a professional,
47:17
Speaker 3: my students are dear and they will read cool and
47:20
Speaker 3: I send them clients because people reach out to me
47:23
Speaker 3: and I say, what do you need a reading on,
47:25
Speaker 3: and then I find them the right student. Of course,
47:28
Speaker 3: I don't charge my students for sending them work, so
47:31
Speaker 3: of course I use intuitives. Oh my goodness. And my husband,
47:34
Speaker 3: who's a screen and TV writer, he used to be
47:38
Speaker 3: as intuitive as a rock. He just refused he was
47:42
Speaker 3: an intellectual. And I finally said to him, you know,
47:45
Speaker 3: when I ask you whether I should do this, I
47:48
Speaker 3: don't want your intellectual answer based on experience which may
47:52
Speaker 3: not be relevant. I don't want your emotional answer. I
47:55
Speaker 3: don't want your judgment. I want your attention to go
47:58
Speaker 3: to the future when I've done this, and I want
48:01
Speaker 3: you to be able to accurately tell me what the
48:04
Speaker 3: result is so that I can revise now, and I said,
48:07
Speaker 3: otherwise I feel alone. It was beautifully manipulative of me,
48:11
Speaker 3: because my husband does not want me to feel alone.
48:14
Speaker 3: And now he is one of my best intuitives. And
48:17
Speaker 3: it's deep into his work also because now when he writes,
48:21
Speaker 3: a character really becomes them, because that is an intuitive gift,
48:25
Speaker 3: the ability to become something else and speak from it
48:29
Speaker 3: with its voice.
48:31
Speaker 1: So part of the goal setting that I've noticed is
48:35
Speaker 1: really asking yourself questions. And I love questions. I'm a
48:40
Speaker 1: journalist by trade, so I love them to begin with.
48:42
Speaker 1: I really believe that questions are like a fundamental, very
48:46
Speaker 1: easy thing that we can all tap into to help
48:49
Speaker 1: amplify our lives.
48:50
Speaker 3: Absolutely, because there are no answers. An answer is good
48:54
Speaker 3: in such a narrow space. But when you're asking the
48:57
Speaker 3: right questions, you keep adjust this moment. And that's really
49:03
Speaker 3: what makes a successful life is the ability to adjust
49:06
Speaker 3: every moment, even your im statements. They shouldn't be able
49:10
Speaker 3: to be manipulated or crushed by your world, but they
49:14
Speaker 3: should be semi permeable. They should be able to take
49:18
Speaker 3: in new information so that you can become what you
49:22
Speaker 3: didn't even know because you didn't experience it ever before.
49:26
Speaker 3: You can become what you want to become, to find
49:28
Speaker 3: the world that you want to find.
49:30
Speaker 1: Absolutely right, And I do feel like questions are at
49:33
Speaker 1: the crux of that. You've been doing this for over
49:36
Speaker 1: forty years. I'm wondering if you have a question about
49:40
Speaker 1: intuition that you ponder often, or something you don't have
49:45
Speaker 1: an exact answer for.
49:46
Speaker 3: I mean, I have so many. I mean I live
49:49
Speaker 3: in a world of questions. I think that you know
49:53
Speaker 3: life and death for me just because so many people
49:56
Speaker 3: in my family have suicided. So life and death for
49:59
Speaker 3: me have always been kind of an interesting boundary to
50:05
Speaker 3: sit on. I know that I get very accurate information
50:10
Speaker 3: and actually can describe people who have died the energy
50:15
Speaker 3: that was left here, is it actually the dead person?
50:18
Speaker 3: Like I went to a high school that's all math
50:21
Speaker 3: and science. Now I'm very much more math and science
50:24
Speaker 3: than a language person. So I am the original skeptic.
50:29
Speaker 3: But I don't want the answer to that question. I
50:32
Speaker 3: don't want the answer to the question of exactly I
50:35
Speaker 3: have a sense of what happens after we perceive that
50:39
Speaker 3: we die, But there are things I actually don't want
50:43
Speaker 3: to know, because I want to be committed to the
50:46
Speaker 3: human experience. And I think that one thing intuition does
50:50
Speaker 3: that isn't good is it allows you to really experience
50:54
Speaker 3: the oneness, and it allows you to make all the
50:57
Speaker 3: right moves and create all the right things for yourself
51:00
Speaker 3: without experiencing anything. And that's not being alive. And I
51:05
Speaker 3: really am. I'm committed to the experience of being alive,
51:10
Speaker 3: even though sometimes it's very painful and sometimes I don't
51:15
Speaker 3: feel quite up to the task. I do my own work.
51:17
Speaker 3: I was saying before that a lot of my books.
51:20
Speaker 3: I've written two books came as life saving downloads. One
51:24
Speaker 3: was The Circle, and this I realized was downloaded to
51:27
Speaker 3: me when I was really a little child, and it
51:31
Speaker 3: just took maturity and the ability to teach it to
51:36
Speaker 3: people so I could see that it had an effect
51:38
Speaker 3: outside of myself. This really helped me create a life
51:44
Speaker 3: that I mean, I wake up I am pretty much
51:47
Speaker 3: the sole survivor, and I wake up and I think wow.
51:50
Speaker 3: And I don't always feel blessed. Sometimes I feel anxious.
51:53
Speaker 3: I mean, I still my childhood waking up with small children.
51:57
Speaker 3: I didn't know how to take care of, and a
51:58
Speaker 3: mother who I didn't know if i'd find dead or
52:00
Speaker 3: half dead. But I think how broken, cracked and bent
52:06
Speaker 3: my prism started as both neurologically, genetically and in terms
52:11
Speaker 3: of experience, how fortunate I am, how okay it is
52:16
Speaker 3: that I'm imperfect because I've created such a wonderful life.
52:20
Speaker 3: And I think that all of us have to remind ourselves.
52:24
Speaker 3: You know, what standard are we holding ourselves too? In
52:27
Speaker 3: my family, just being alive as a high standard. You
52:29
Speaker 3: know you have not taken your own life that is
52:31
Speaker 3: already a high standard. I see people reach out to
52:34
Speaker 3: me by email or on Instagram or through my website
52:38
Speaker 3: when they're in real pain.
52:40
Speaker 2: Yeah they're seeking, But you know, we don't seek.
52:43
Speaker 3: When we're okay, and we shouldn't seek when we're okay.
52:45
Speaker 3: We should be in the okay, we should joy, we
52:49
Speaker 3: should be in the moment. But people feel they've ruined
52:53
Speaker 3: their lives so many times, and I want to tell them, honey,
52:56
Speaker 3: I have ruined my life more times than I can
52:59
Speaker 3: tell you. But when you do the prison work, when
53:02
Speaker 3: you do go work, when you just put one foot
53:06
Speaker 3: in front of the other, you will get somewhere that
53:10
Speaker 3: you want to go. Pain really hurts, you know, the
53:13
Speaker 3: way people judge their pain. Oh, I shouldn't feel so badly.
53:16
Speaker 3: At least I have food on the table. Yeah, you're
53:18
Speaker 3: still allowed to feel badly and feel sorry for somelf.
53:21
Speaker 3: Oh I shouldn't feel so badly. You know this, But
53:24
Speaker 3: I have so much wealth, and you are allowed. If
53:28
Speaker 3: you didn't want, you wouldn't create. And I think that
53:31
Speaker 3: that misplaced self judgment. It's good to be judged. When
53:35
Speaker 3: you do something wrong, you should rectify it. I think
53:37
Speaker 3: it is good to be an integral person, but we
53:42
Speaker 3: judge ourselves so harshly, both for what we achieve and
53:47
Speaker 3: also for what we want. You know, why shouldn't someone
53:50
Speaker 3: want a great car? If they want a great car,
53:53
Speaker 3: that's a symbol. We live in a world of symbols.
53:56
Speaker 3: You know, you're working hard at something. Why should shouldn't
54:00
Speaker 3: you want to really be the entirety of everything you
54:05
Speaker 3: can be? That is a very healthy thing. You know,
54:08
Speaker 3: Martyrs are not healthy people. That's a psychiatric disorder.
54:12
Speaker 1: I actually think that's the big takeaway from our conversation today.
54:16
Speaker 2: I had a lot of takeaways from the book.
54:17
Speaker 1: But today I'm really hearing you say, go forth in
54:21
Speaker 1: all of your wants, but.
54:23
Speaker 3: Pick three because one of the problems we have is
54:26
Speaker 3: we hop around. Then we have a lot of unfinished projects.
54:32
Speaker 2: Okay, and so what are your three wants right now?
54:35
Speaker 3: Oh?
54:36
Speaker 2: Are you able to share?
54:38
Speaker 3: All of my three wants go under one umbrella, and
54:41
Speaker 3: that umbrella is my family. But within that, you know
54:47
Speaker 3: the joy I get from teachings. I want a community
54:51
Speaker 3: to teach and to learn from that has ease to it.
54:55
Speaker 3: You know, this is the first book I've published in
54:56
Speaker 3: fourteen years, so I'm teaching a very specific thing in
55:00
Speaker 3: the past, which is intuitive development. I want to teach this.
55:04
Speaker 3: The other ones they all fit under that umbrella. But
55:07
Speaker 3: they are a little private.
55:09
Speaker 1: That's totally okay. I actually kind of like that. I
55:11
Speaker 1: think they are private. Maybe they should stay that way
55:14
Speaker 1: for everybody, you know.
55:15
Speaker 3: Sometimes, you know, I definitely ask my community please support me.
55:21
Speaker 3: This is important to me. Please support me in this
55:24
Speaker 3: because it is wonderful to give voice to things, because
55:27
Speaker 3: then you can cultivate support. It's easy for me to
55:31
Speaker 3: talk about really wanting to be happy. And I have
55:35
Speaker 3: been successful in the world, but successful to me means
55:39
Speaker 3: I can do a prison group anywhere in the world
55:41
Speaker 3: any time I want, with a week's notice, you know,
55:45
Speaker 3: and have a group of amazing, capable people changing their lives,
55:49
Speaker 3: whereas some of the more heart centered goals are a
55:55
Speaker 3: little more difficult to express on a show.
55:58
Speaker 2: My last question for you, Laura.
56:01
Speaker 1: I saw Trevor Noah ask Oprah this and I thought
56:03
Speaker 1: it was a really interesting question. He said, You've interviewed
56:06
Speaker 1: so many of the most quote unquote successful people in
56:09
Speaker 1: the world. Is there anything that you see they have
56:11
Speaker 1: in common? You've done the same, You've worked with so
56:15
Speaker 1: many successful people.
56:16
Speaker 2: Do you see a through line?
56:18
Speaker 3: I mean, actually, the through line is that they're intuitive
56:22
Speaker 3: and that they apply their intuition. Not intuitive in terms
56:26
Speaker 3: of I believe this is going to happen, But they
56:29
Speaker 3: do have goals and their attention takes them to how
56:34
Speaker 3: to create them. So they are intuitive, sometimes without knowing
56:38
Speaker 3: they're intuitive. They work intuitively because logic is flawed because
56:43
Speaker 3: it's only as good as the data it has, whereas
56:46
Speaker 3: intuition gives you exactly the data you need. And so
56:49
Speaker 3: every ego center in the prism does have an intuitive
56:54
Speaker 3: work that I want people to do because what it
56:56
Speaker 3: allows you to do is to put your life on autumn,
57:00
Speaker 3: a pilot in a way so that you can be
57:02
Speaker 3: present in the moment. But the future comes in when
57:06
Speaker 3: you need that information to pivot, or the past comes
57:09
Speaker 3: in when you need to reframe something to be able
57:12
Speaker 3: to grow into who you want to be in that moment.
57:15
Speaker 3: It's almost harder intuitively to read someone's past than their future.
57:20
Speaker 3: That their future is clean. Their past they have judgment
57:23
Speaker 3: and projections about, but we can change those and it
57:26
Speaker 3: changes us.
57:28
Speaker 2: Thank you so much. I really appreciate your time.
57:31
Speaker 3: Thank you, this is really lovely.
57:38
Speaker 1: Okay, you know what time it is. Today's a good day,
57:41
Speaker 1: to have a good day. I'll see you next week.