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294: Introducing the Regulated Kids Project · Beautifully Complex

0:03
Speaker 1: A successful adult must be able to self regulate. And
0:08
Speaker 1: the more emotionally intelligent they are, the more joy they're
0:11
Speaker 1: going to have, the more good interactions with other people
0:14
Speaker 1: they're going to have. Right, it's just going to be
0:16
Speaker 1: a more fulfilled life if they are emotionally intelligent. And
0:21
Speaker 1: that's really why I'm focusing the Regular Kids Project on
0:24
Speaker 1: those two things, regulation and emotional intelligence, and they tie together.
0:31
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Beautifully Complex podcast, where I share insights
0:35
Speaker 1: and strategies on parenting neurodivergent kids straight from the trenches.
0:40
Speaker 1: I'm your host, Penny Williams. I'm a parenting coach, author,
0:43
Speaker 1: and mindset mama, honored to guide you on the journey
0:47
Speaker 1: of raising your atypical kid. Let's get started. Hey there, everyone,
0:55
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Beautifully Complex. I am really excited that
1:00
Speaker 1: you're listening today because I'm talking about something that is
1:05
Speaker 1: so incredibly close to my heart and I hope is
1:09
Speaker 1: going to be very transformational for your family as well.
1:14
Speaker 1: If you've been a listener for a while, you know
1:17
Speaker 1: that I've spent years coaching parents of neurodivergent kids as
1:22
Speaker 1: I raised my own neurodivergent kid. We've talked about big emotions, meltdowns,
1:30
Speaker 1: so many challenges of parenting kids whose wiring is different,
1:36
Speaker 1: is complex, and sometimes, if I'm being honest, exhausting, frustrating,
1:43
Speaker 1: heartbreaking all of the things. And I know this because
1:48
Speaker 1: I've been there. I've had those same moments where I
1:52
Speaker 1: felt like I was doing everything and then some and
1:58
Speaker 1: things still weren't working. Traditional parenting advice wasn't working, My
2:02
Speaker 1: parenting instincts weren't working, and it made me really worried
2:08
Speaker 1: about my kid's future because it was all consuming. Right,
2:12
Speaker 1: you've been there. It can be so all consuming raising
2:17
Speaker 1: complex kids because we just don't know where to start
2:20
Speaker 1: and where to focus and what to prioritize on all
2:23
Speaker 1: of these things. Right, And that's why I am so
2:27
Speaker 1: super excited to announce the grand opening of something that
2:32
Speaker 1: I've really been pouring my heart, my parenting wisdom, and
2:35
Speaker 1: my expertise into. It's called the Regulated Kids Project. It
2:41
Speaker 1: isn't just another parenting course. In fact, it is not
2:45
Speaker 1: a course at all. It's a community. It's a resource
2:50
Speaker 1: library of many lessons, activities, exercises, and discoveries and a
2:56
Speaker 1: roadmap to help you teach your kid the Regulation and
3:01
Speaker 1: the emotional intelligence skills that they need to succeed in
3:07
Speaker 1: life for life. We're talking about lifelong skills here. I
3:12
Speaker 1: want to tell you why I created the Regulated Kids
3:14
Speaker 1: projects that it makes sense to you, why it's so
3:18
Speaker 1: important for parents of really any kid, but especially those
3:23
Speaker 1: of us who have complex kids. Over the years, I've
3:27
Speaker 1: worked with so many parents, parents like you, parents like me,
3:32
Speaker 1: who've tried everything. We've tried timeouts, we've tried sticker charts,
3:36
Speaker 1: we've tried empathy, we've tried rewards, consequences, and even just
3:41
Speaker 1: that hyper vigilance, hoping to avoid the next emotional storm,
3:49
Speaker 1: the next meltdown. And yet, if you're anything like I
3:54
Speaker 1: was for such a long time, the meltdowns just keep coming.
3:59
Speaker 1: But the thing is, we can't be focusing on what's
4:03
Speaker 1: wrong with our complex kids. It's not about that at all.
4:07
Speaker 1: Nothing is wrong with them. It's about helping them successfully
4:12
Speaker 1: navigate this world with their differences. It's about helping them
4:18
Speaker 1: discover and harness that greatness that's within them. They do
4:24
Speaker 1: have greatness within them. It's about setting them up for
4:28
Speaker 1: success for life. We're raising adults, right, That's our goal.
4:35
Speaker 1: That's our job to grow these kids to foster happy,
4:41
Speaker 1: healthy adults, whatever that looks like for them. Kids who
4:48
Speaker 1: struggle with dysregulation, I often call it chronic dysregulation. Seems
4:54
Speaker 1: like they're disregulated more often than they're regulated. They're not
4:58
Speaker 1: giving you a hard time. These behaviors, big behaviors, big emotions,
5:03
Speaker 1: they're not a choice, they're not intentional. Our kids are
5:06
Speaker 1: actually having a hard time. And once I started to
5:10
Speaker 1: understand this role of the nervous system in big emotions
5:15
Speaker 1: and big behaviors, it changed everything for my kid, for me,
5:21
Speaker 1: and for our whole family. Literally total game changer. You
5:27
Speaker 1: see wendle big emotions to adapt to challenges and to
5:32
Speaker 1: feel safe and supported when those things happen, Things get doable,
5:39
Speaker 1: connection happens, tasks happen right, Things we enjoy and we
5:45
Speaker 1: want to do happen. Because, let's face it, some of
5:48
Speaker 1: our kids avoid things they even want to do because
5:51
Speaker 1: they're disregulated or because they fear the activity might be dysregulating.
5:56
Speaker 1: And so we want to help them to get their
6:00
Speaker 1: nervous system and their brain, their whole body ready to succeed.
6:06
Speaker 1: And that's what focusing on regulation and emotional intelligence does
6:10
Speaker 1: for us. But here's the tricky part. Regulation isn't something
6:16
Speaker 1: that kids automatically learn to do. It's a skill that
6:22
Speaker 1: we have to co create with them. It one hundred
6:26
Speaker 1: percent starts with us, the parent, the educator, the adult
6:30
Speaker 1: in that child's life. That's where the Regulated Kids Project
6:35
Speaker 1: comes in to give you the tools, the strategies, the support,
6:39
Speaker 1: the community, the activities, that exercises, the games that will
6:44
Speaker 1: teach these skills to your kid and will also transform
6:49
Speaker 1: your entire family dynamic. So let's walk through what's inside
6:54
Speaker 1: the Regulated Kids Project. It is a membership that is
6:58
Speaker 1: designed when one hundred percent with busy, overwhelmed, chaotic parents, families,
7:06
Speaker 1: kids in mind. Okay, I have been where you may
7:10
Speaker 1: very well be right now, felt like I couldn't possibly
7:14
Speaker 1: take on anything else, but I would have been able
7:17
Speaker 1: to take on these tiny little things, little mini lessons
7:21
Speaker 1: I'm calling them. And that's why I have designed the
7:26
Speaker 1: Regulated Kids Project in the way that I have, so
7:28
Speaker 1: that you can fit it in your life and that
7:31
Speaker 1: it is very focused on intention and implementation. So many
7:38
Speaker 1: parenting courses, you either get too overwhelmed to even finish them,
7:43
Speaker 1: or you finish the learning, but you don't know how
7:47
Speaker 1: to implement it, how to translate it into your life.
7:52
Speaker 1: And this membership is about helping you take small moments
7:57
Speaker 1: to learn to connect, to do activities and exercise with
8:01
Speaker 1: your kids, to also weave them into your every day life.
8:08
Speaker 1: Everything that you're already doing, we're going to weave it
8:10
Speaker 1: into your kid's routines, We're going to weave it into
8:14
Speaker 1: what your daily schedule looks like. It is going to
8:17
Speaker 1: become part of your normal, and it is designed to
8:20
Speaker 1: be able to do that as simply as possible. So
8:24
Speaker 1: each month, if you are a member in the Regular
8:28
Speaker 1: Kids Project, here's what you're going to get. Number one
8:31
Speaker 1: four Quick Wins Lessons. They're bite sized lessons packed with
8:36
Speaker 1: practical tools. Some are for you the parents are the
8:40
Speaker 1: adult strategies to be the calm anchor and how to coregulate,
8:45
Speaker 1: and others are for your kids, like fun exercises and
8:48
Speaker 1: principles to build their self regulation skills and emotional intelligence.
8:55
Speaker 1: They essentially are a approximately five minute video of me
9:01
Speaker 1: talking you through whatever the activity or exercise or cheat
9:06
Speaker 1: sheet or worksheet or journaling prompt all of these different
9:10
Speaker 1: things are part of our themes each month, and I
9:15
Speaker 1: just record a very short video to tell you about
9:18
Speaker 1: the project, the activity, whatever it is, and to help
9:23
Speaker 1: you understand how to use it and how to implement it.
9:26
Speaker 1: It's very short, very simple, really focusing on incorporating play
9:31
Speaker 1: and fun and engagement and connection in all of these activities.
9:36
Speaker 1: So not only are we building skills, we're also nurturing
9:41
Speaker 1: our kids. We're also fostering that connection that also helps
9:46
Speaker 1: them to be regulated. The second thing inside the Regular
9:50
Speaker 1: Kids Project is a live community support call. Every month,
9:54
Speaker 1: we are going to get on Zoom together you me
9:58
Speaker 1: other parents like us neurodivergent kids, and we're going to
10:02
Speaker 1: have the chance to connect. We're going to have the
10:05
Speaker 1: chance to troubleshoot challenges in real time, ask questions, celebrate
10:11
Speaker 1: wins because yes, we celebrate even the smallest successes, and
10:16
Speaker 1: to get encouragement to help you keep going. I am
10:20
Speaker 1: all about parent mindset and how much that can transform
10:24
Speaker 1: your parenting journey, and we will talk a lot about
10:26
Speaker 1: that as well. Each month, you're also going to get
10:30
Speaker 1: two pre recorded expert webinars that you can watch on
10:33
Speaker 1: demand whenever it fits into your schedule, and these are
10:38
Speaker 1: completely focused on neurodivergence. So when we have a theme
10:46
Speaker 1: on say meltdowns one month. Then we're going to have
10:50
Speaker 1: a couple of expert pre recorded webinars that will be
10:52
Speaker 1: right there in the hub for you, pulled out sort
10:55
Speaker 1: of curated for you because they are on that same topic.
11:01
Speaker 1: You can watch them, not watch them. It's totally up
11:04
Speaker 1: to you, but it's going to be there for you
11:06
Speaker 1: whenever you would like to use it. There's also a
11:19
Speaker 1: twenty four to seven access to the Loomy Bot. Let
11:24
Speaker 1: me explain to you a little bit about Loomy. Loomy
11:27
Speaker 1: is an owl and she represents regulation and if you're
11:32
Speaker 1: a member inside Regulated Kids Project. Right first, in our
11:37
Speaker 1: first month in January twenty twenty five, you are going
11:40
Speaker 1: to get an activity slash kid lesson about animal instincts.
11:46
Speaker 1: And I have assigned and named an animal for each
11:52
Speaker 1: state of our nervous system so that kids can really
11:54
Speaker 1: understand what is going on inside for them and how
12:01
Speaker 1: to identify how their body is feeling and what that means. Right,
12:06
Speaker 1: they need to also be able to interpret those signals
12:10
Speaker 1: from their body and learn how to use them, and
12:13
Speaker 1: so that's one of the lessons in January. We have
12:16
Speaker 1: these adorable little animal characters. Their Loomy Bolt, Prickles, and Tuck,
12:25
Speaker 1: and I also have a version for teens young adults
12:29
Speaker 1: that have photographs instead of these illustrations, whatever works for
12:33
Speaker 1: your kid. I'm really trying to be mindful of having
12:37
Speaker 1: kids engage with these activities and also having ways that
12:42
Speaker 1: they feel represented in the different activities, whether that's different age,
12:46
Speaker 1: different gender, different gender identity, different race, all of those things,
12:50
Speaker 1: and really trying to be very conscientious of that as well.
12:54
Speaker 1: And so we have those animals and they're going to
12:56
Speaker 1: carry through in a lot of the lessons throughout the
12:59
Speaker 1: Regulator Kids project. So I'm really excited for you guys
13:02
Speaker 1: to meet them and see them and introduce your kids
13:05
Speaker 1: to them. But that Loomy Bot, who was named after
13:08
Speaker 1: Loomy the Owl who represents regulated state of our nervous system,
13:13
Speaker 1: is an AI powered bot that is trained by a
13:18
Speaker 1: very large library of expert parenting advice that is completely
13:23
Speaker 1: tailored to neurodiversent kids. So think of it as your
13:28
Speaker 1: little tech parenting assistant. It is there twenty four to
13:32
Speaker 1: seven and you can just type in a question it's
13:35
Speaker 1: going to answer you from that entire library of experts,
13:41
Speaker 1: and it will even give you the references of where
13:43
Speaker 1: it got that information so that you can learn more,
13:46
Speaker 1: and it is almost instantaneous. Within ten seconds, it starts
13:51
Speaker 1: spitting out the answer to your question. So maybe you
13:55
Speaker 1: have a question at two am about a meltdown strategy.
13:58
Speaker 1: You're either awake at night where about it? Or maybe
14:01
Speaker 1: your kid's having a melt down at two am. You
14:04
Speaker 1: can pop into the Regular Kids Project Hub, click the
14:07
Speaker 1: little button to open LOOMI, ask your question and get
14:11
Speaker 1: some expert answers, some expert guidance. The looming bot has
14:15
Speaker 1: you covered twenty four seven, three sixty five. The fifth
14:19
Speaker 1: thing inside this Regulated Kids Project is a growing resource library.
14:24
Speaker 1: So it's not really a fifth thing. It's this library
14:28
Speaker 1: of lessons, of activities, of games, of principles of parenting worksheets,
14:33
Speaker 1: and parenting self work is just going to continue to
14:38
Speaker 1: grow and grow and grow. In January twenty twenty five,
14:42
Speaker 1: the first month that it opens, I have twelve different lessons, activities, exercises,
14:48
Speaker 1: games in there for you. So it's already going to
14:52
Speaker 1: be a library of different opportunities for you and your kid,
14:57
Speaker 1: but it's going to keep growing. So it's really a
15:00
Speaker 1: toolkit for lifelong success. There are things in there that
15:05
Speaker 1: can help you with your struggle right now today, but
15:08
Speaker 1: they're also going to build the skills for life for
15:12
Speaker 1: your kid, because a successful adult must be able to
15:17
Speaker 1: self regulate. And the more emotionally intelligent they are, the
15:22
Speaker 1: more joy they're going to have, the more good interactions
15:25
Speaker 1: with other people they're going to have. Right, it's just
15:27
Speaker 1: going to be a more fulfilled life if they are
15:32
Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent. And that's really why I'm focusing the Regular
15:35
Speaker 1: Kids Project on those two things, regulation and emotional intelligence,
15:40
Speaker 1: and they tie together, but those are foundational for life's
15:44
Speaker 1: success period. They're foundational to have a life full of joy,
15:50
Speaker 1: and that is why I want to help you build
15:53
Speaker 1: those skills in your kids and for yourselves. Right because
15:57
Speaker 1: my generation certainly wasn't focusing on it. I think now
16:00
Speaker 1: our kids' younger kids, like this very newest generation are
16:04
Speaker 1: probably going to get some of this, but we're still
16:07
Speaker 1: not focusing on teaching these skills as much as we should.
16:11
Speaker 1: And then the last thing inside the Regulated Kids Project
16:15
Speaker 1: is the parent community. We have a full discussion board
16:20
Speaker 1: community right inside the hub is only available to members,
16:25
Speaker 1: so anything you post there stays inside that hub, and
16:30
Speaker 1: this was really important to me to incorporate. Also because
16:34
Speaker 1: connection with other parents who get it, who are traveling
16:38
Speaker 1: a similar parenting path is paramount to your mental and
16:44
Speaker 1: emotional wellbeing as the parent. You need to be able
16:49
Speaker 1: to interact with, get support from, be heard and seen
16:55
Speaker 1: by other people who get it inside that community. We're
17:00
Speaker 1: going to have some accountability because I know that is
17:03
Speaker 1: so helpful to make sure that you're using the lessons
17:07
Speaker 1: and activities. We're also going to celebrate wins. There's a
17:10
Speaker 1: whole board just on celebrating wins and successes. We're going
17:15
Speaker 1: to share ideas, share things that have worked for us.
17:18
Speaker 1: We're going to ask for ideas and ask for things
17:20
Speaker 1: that have worked for others. And we're going to support
17:22
Speaker 1: each other through both the highs and the lows. Plus
17:29
Speaker 1: I'm going to give you a little bit more here.
17:31
Speaker 1: We also will have live Q and as with surprise
17:34
Speaker 1: guest experts from time to time. I am lining up
17:38
Speaker 1: some really amazing guests to pop in from time to time.
17:44
Speaker 1: It will be scheduled, there will be some notice to
17:48
Speaker 1: that at least a month in advance for who's going
17:50
Speaker 1: to do a Q and A and when it's going
17:52
Speaker 1: to happen, but we will just have some of that.
17:56
Speaker 1: Sometimes it will be about the theme of the month
17:58
Speaker 1: and regulation and emotional and tell. Sometimes it'll be about
18:01
Speaker 1: something else that is also related to neurodivergent kids, but
18:07
Speaker 1: may not be related to that month's theme. And that's
18:09
Speaker 1: okay because there's so much more that can be helpful
18:13
Speaker 1: for you also, right, not just regulation and emotional intelligence.
18:18
Speaker 1: So let's talk a little bit about what the benefits
18:21
Speaker 1: might be for you. You might be wondering, well, that
18:24
Speaker 1: sounds great, but what does that look like for me?
18:27
Speaker 1: If I join and I start using these lessons and
18:31
Speaker 1: activities with myself and with my kid, what is going
18:35
Speaker 1: to change. Here's what's going to change for you, the
18:38
Speaker 1: parent peace of mind. You'll finally have tools that actually
18:43
Speaker 1: work for your complex kid. That's going to bring you
18:46
Speaker 1: more confidence in your parenting because you will start to
18:49
Speaker 1: know what to do when your kid's having a meltdown.
18:51
Speaker 1: That's actually going to be helpful because there's so much
18:54
Speaker 1: we can do that isn't helpful. You're going to learn
18:57
Speaker 1: what to teach your child to prove event meltdowns. Because
19:01
Speaker 1: when our kids are more regulated, then we have less dysregulation,
19:07
Speaker 1: and less dysregulation means less likelihood of meltdown. Right, You're
19:11
Speaker 1: also going to build stronger connection. That's stronger connection with
19:16
Speaker 1: your kid, stronger connection within your family, and some connection
19:20
Speaker 1: with other parents who get it, and maybe less overwhelm
19:25
Speaker 1: and less exhaustion. Imagine if you had less power struggles,
19:33
Speaker 1: fewer power struggles in your household. I mean, my brain
19:37
Speaker 1: is going right now thinking about that, right, and definitely
19:42
Speaker 1: think about that when my kids were little, and that's
19:44
Speaker 1: going to bring you more peace. We all want a
19:46
Speaker 1: peaceful household, right, we want a peaceful family. This is
19:49
Speaker 1: going to help you to start stepping in that direction.
19:53
Speaker 1: And then the changes that our kids are going to
19:56
Speaker 1: experience are monumental and lifelong. As I have said many
20:00
Speaker 1: many times, one improved regulation skills. They are going to
20:05
Speaker 1: learn to manage big emotions without so much of the intensity,
20:11
Speaker 1: without losing control of what is happening, what they're saying,
20:16
Speaker 1: what their emotions are doing, what their behavior looks like. Right,
20:22
Speaker 1: increased confidence. With increased confidence, our kids will feel more
20:28
Speaker 1: in control of themselves, in control of their life and
20:32
Speaker 1: what happens to them. And that's going to build a
20:34
Speaker 1: lot of self esteem. When kids feel confident, they are regulated.
20:41
Speaker 1: If you feel confident, think about that. Can you really
20:45
Speaker 1: be confident and disregulated? My mind is feeling like the
20:49
Speaker 1: answers no to that. Confidence builds regulation. Your kids are
20:54
Speaker 1: also going to have better relationships as they regulate better.
20:58
Speaker 1: They'll connect more easily with siblings, with peers, with family,
21:04
Speaker 1: with everyone in their life. And I know this sounds cliche,
21:10
Speaker 1: but they're also going to have a brighter future because
21:14
Speaker 1: these skills are going to help them socially, emotionally, academically
21:19
Speaker 1: for their lifetime. So if you're listening to this and thinking,
21:25
Speaker 1: this is exactly what we need, because I'm stepping back
21:28
Speaker 1: into my much younger mom self when my kid was
21:33
Speaker 1: young and everything was so chaotic and so overwhelming and
21:36
Speaker 1: so hard and nothing was working, I would have listened
21:40
Speaker 1: to this and gone, you cannot tell me fast enough
21:43
Speaker 1: what I need to do to get this. I need
21:45
Speaker 1: this so bad, which is why I've created it and
21:49
Speaker 1: why I have structured it in the way that I have,
21:51
Speaker 1: because it's exactly what I needed. So if you feel
21:55
Speaker 1: like it's what you need too, I want you to
21:58
Speaker 1: know that you don't have to navigate all of this
22:02
Speaker 1: alone anymore. You just don't. And I know that the
22:05
Speaker 1: podcast is really helpful, but that only goes so far, right.
22:09
Speaker 1: The Regulated Kids Project is here to give you, like downloadably,
22:15
Speaker 1: the tools, the guidance, the support to make real, lasting
22:19
Speaker 1: change for your family. You are getting the tangible things
22:24
Speaker 1: and the how to all together. This isn't just about
22:30
Speaker 1: reducing meltdowns, guys. I want to make that very clear.
22:32
Speaker 1: It's not just about reducing meltdowns. It's about creating a
22:37
Speaker 1: family life where you feel connected, calm and confident, where
22:42
Speaker 1: your kid feels connected, calm and confident, where things feel
22:47
Speaker 1: doable for everyone, where things feel peaceful for everyone. Now,
22:54
Speaker 1: let's be real, every moment of every day can't be peaceful.
22:57
Speaker 1: We are human beings and this is real life. But
23:00
Speaker 1: we can create more of that absolutely. And then most importantly,
23:06
Speaker 1: it's about giving your kid the skills to thrive in
23:10
Speaker 1: their own, very beautifully, very complex way. The Regulated Kids
23:16
Speaker 1: Project is now open as we release this episode of
23:20
Speaker 1: Beautifully Complex. The doors opened for the grand opening yesterday,
23:25
Speaker 1: So if you're ready to say goodbye to a lot
23:28
Speaker 1: of that chaos, a lot of that frustration, and to
23:32
Speaker 1: really have a map to start building a more peaceful,
23:36
Speaker 1: connected home life. I want you to go to regulatedkids
23:39
Speaker 1: dot com. Check out this membership, this community. I hope
23:45
Speaker 1: you'll join right away. The first thirty members are getting
23:49
Speaker 1: some awesome free gifts, and I hope that some of
23:52
Speaker 1: you make it in time to get some of those
23:54
Speaker 1: as well. I can't wait to see you inside the membership,
23:58
Speaker 1: to meet you, to work with you, to help you,
24:00
Speaker 1: to watch your journey and just be a teeny tiny
24:03
Speaker 1: part of it because I know that your family is
24:06
Speaker 1: going to transform and I love, guys, I love, love
24:11
Speaker 1: love watching that happen. As always, I really thank you
24:15
Speaker 1: for being here, for trusting me to walk with you
24:18
Speaker 1: on part of this journey, and for showing up for
24:22
Speaker 1: your kid. You're here listening to this podcast. You're already
24:26
Speaker 1: doing amazing things for your kid. I just want you
24:30
Speaker 1: to take a minute. Pat yourself on the back. Literally
24:33
Speaker 1: do it. I'm doing it right now. Pat, Pat, Pat,
24:36
Speaker 1: Tell yourself. I am enough. I've got this and I
24:41
Speaker 1: can help my kid thrive. Let's do it together. I
24:45
Speaker 1: would love to see you over at the Regulated Kids
24:47
Speaker 1: project regulatkids dot com. Take good care, guys. Thanks for
24:53
Speaker 1: joining me on the Beautifully Complex podcast. If you enjoyed
24:56
Speaker 1: this episode, please subscribe and share, and don't forget to
25:00
Speaker 1: check out my online courses and parent coaching at Parenting
25:04
Speaker 1: ADHD and Autism dot com and at The Behavior Revolution
25:08
Speaker 1: dot com