Latest / The Infertile Diaries / Dear Diary: Infertility Question and Answer Forum Part 2

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Dear Diary: Infertility Question and Answer Forum Part 2 · The Infertile Diaries

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_02: What if the hardest part of infertility isn't the shots, the procedures, or the waiting?
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_02: What if it's believing you're still worthy when the dream of motherhood feels out of reach?
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_02: For years, infertility whispered a lie.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_02: I believed all too well.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_02: You're not good enough.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_02: You're not worthy.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe you were never meant to be a mom.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_02: Today, we are answering a few of your infertility questions and sharing the one thing we wished we knew before or during IVS.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_02: And how we fought back against the lie that we weren't enough.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_02: We discussed all this and more.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to the Infertile Diaries.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_03: This isn't just a podcast.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_03: This is your place.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_03: And it are your stories.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_03: A place of heartbreak to hope.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: This is the Infertile Diaries Podcast.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_02: Or you can just ask it, or we have we have a bunch of questions that we like wrote out.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_02: I gave Lindsay all the fun ones.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how does trying to conceive affect you and your husband's intimate life?
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, You got this, Lindsay.
• 1:30
  unknown: I do.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, I'll I'll just throw out a question.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_02: One thing that someone asked was, what is one thing that you wish you knew before or during your IVF cycle?
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_03: And so, do you have anything?
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_03: Just really the progesterone shots.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_03: I wish that someone had told me how to manage that better with the hot and cold presses.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_03: I used to get huge big things.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_03: Like just shot management.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I don't know how to take care of yourself.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like there was nothing.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_03: There was no like, here's like a very um, like a here's a caregiver's guide to these shots.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_03: It was like you just had to figure it out.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_02: You have to like become medical all of a sudden.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_02: I know.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_02: Wayne was gone one time, and I had to do a progesterone shot on my own, and I got like a bleeder in my butt, and I like literally squirting blood.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_02: I'm like, oh my gosh, my gosh, I'm not equipped for this.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's the only thing.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_03: What about you?
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, so mine was the one thing I wish I knew was that you have to be your own advocate and do your own research.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like when I met with the doctor, Dr.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_02: Loy, I love him.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: He's the most incredible doctor.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_02: He still like writes me a handwritten note every year.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh, that's so sweet.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he's incredible.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_02: But I was like, oh, you're gonna take care of me.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that that was like, oh yeah, you got this.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_02: No, uh-uh.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_02: Uh-uh.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I mean, he was wonderful, but like the office was a hot mess.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_02: Obviously, I told you about like I met with that first doctor, and it like, you know, I just didn't get a good vibe.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm doctor shop, you know, like make them know.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I love, I love how um you pointed that out in your story because it's so important.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_03: If you go into a doctor's office and you don't have a good feeling or you're not jiving, get out of there.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I have friends that um little preschool mom friends, and they went to the fertility clinic that that mix-up happened.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I had friends too.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_03: Um, with uh this where they got the wrong embryo.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_03: They got the wrong embryo, and she goes, you know what?
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_03: Literally, we went in there and he was like falling asleep at the desk.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_03: What?
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_03: The doctor?
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, the doctor.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_03: And she was like, I just I I didn't have a good feeling, and we moved we moved on, and thank God now we did.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_03: But it's so important to listen to that.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_03: Your your intuition, your gut feeling.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_03: If you're not liking what they say and it's not a line, then you need to move on for sure.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_02: I think the other thing that surprised me was we, I know Lindsay was saying that you paid for everything out of pocket.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_02: Lane was working for a medical sales company at the time, so we had insurance, and I think it covered two and a half rounds of IVF, which is awesome.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: Which is awesome.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_02: I felt so grateful, but I figured because we had insurance and it was covered that, like, oh, it would all be gravy, but no.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_02: I had all of my medications rejected several times.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_02: And I had to call the office staff and hound and hound and hound them.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: And they had to submit, I think, two appeals before we realized that the insurance company came back, and it was like this little caveat that the office didn't submit the generic version of all of the medications.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, and now it's all approved.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like, this cost me like two cycles, right?
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_02: Right, exactly.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I it was so frustrating.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_02: But and like also, if I hadn't of been the most annoying person ever to like the office manager, she probably wouldn't have like fought so hard on my behalf.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_02: But you're like, really?
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_02: That's what it has to take to like just get medication covered?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_02: You have to pay attention.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you have to pay attention.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_02: Then one of the questions that kind of parlayed into that was Did you ever challenge the reproductive doctors with their next recommendations after several failed transfers?
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_02: And yes, obviously Lindsay did.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_02: You opted for the surrogate.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I think, you know, here's the thing.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_03: We we were talking earlier, and we all have different emotional thresholds, right?
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: And um I didn't share this earlier, but because it's like a whole nother subject, but during the process of of all the IBF and IUI um and getting Gavin, my mom was still alive, but we lost her to cancer too during that time.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_03: And when I had the failed transfer and we it was canceled, and she was like, You try again, I'm like, listen, I I am I am maxed out of losses.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_03: Like I I cannot.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_03: I I literally like life keeps going on as you go through this.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_03: Like and and I think it's so important that you know your body and you know what doesn't push you over the edge.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_03: Like one more loss to me then when I didn't trust my body, when the when the doctor didn't trust my body, she couldn't give me answers.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like sometimes you have to advocate for yourself, and that's what I did.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm not willing to do five more cycles of IBF if you don't know.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I I'm emotionally done, like I can't.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_03: And she agreed with me, and I think you'll be surprised with how much they agree with you.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, if you push back.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: If you push back, yeah, yeah.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_03: That is kind of wild.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_02: You're like, wait, um, you're the expert, right?
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_03: But no, you kind of are the expert of your own body, that's how you're feeling because they do treat you initially like here's one protocol, right?
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_03: And even Ray, like she had our surrogate had three very healthy natural births, but they medicated her like that.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_03: Was their their way for the first cycle?
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_03: They had to do this certain protocol, which was highly medicated, but her body doesn't know that.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, her body knows how to do a natural cycle, and so it like rejected the embryo.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_03: And the second cycle, what was more natural, that's when her body took the embryo.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_03: That's what we did too for Sayla.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_02: It was a more natural round.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so like I didn't do the birth control, I had a really bad reaction to birth control.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_02: When we Lane and I first got married, I had like a legitimate TIA.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_02: I was like in the hospital working in medical sales, and I started feeling funny.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_02: Anyways, went to the car, like full blown, like vision went out, like my left arm went numb.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I was non-verbal when I got to the ER.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_02: It was wild.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_02: From birth control.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_02: So when we did my transfer, it was a more natural transfer.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_02: So we just let my body get like the period.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_02: And then we like did some like add-ons, like with medication once we implanted, but yeah.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_03: So pay attention to your body and how it's handling this these medications because everybody is different.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_03: And generally, what happens is there's one protocol they start out with with every patient.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, another question we got through, and I love this one because I feel like I really thought through this because I felt this so deeply when we were struggling.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_02: But please discuss how you overcame not feeling worthy or not feeling like enough to become a mom.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_03: Do you have any thoughts on that?
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_03: I think it all ties back to I wish I knew then what I know now.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I wish I had trusted his timing a lot more.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_03: I wish I had trusted the journey, but I was just so lost and I I just felt like I wasn't worthy enough to be a mom.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't know why, I didn't know how.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I even I would even when Ray, when when she our surrogate the first transfer didn't work, I had that same feeling.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like, oh, I'm still not worthy.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_03: Like there's something, and I I don't know, maybe it's because you just don't achieve, but I don't think I really honestly, I don't think I really overcame that until I got my babies.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I don't know.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_03: I just wish I would have trusted more.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_03: What about you?
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_02: There is a verse in Psalms, and it's Psalms 127.3, and it says, Children are heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_02: And you guys, that haunted me.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_02: Like I really struggled with that verse because it was like, Well, then what does that say about me?
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_02: Like, am I not being rewarded of the Lord?
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_02: Like, children are heritage.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_02: Ugh, hey God.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_02: Um, am I not worthy to be a mom?
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_02: I remember being at a party one time, and this girl, and she was a Christian, she was like, Oh, you'll get pregnant when God feels like you're ready and you deserve it.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_02: I just remember, like, I had to like pick my jaw off the ground.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_02: Like, what?
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_02: That's very not nice.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_02: That was very not nice.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_02: I know.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_02: There's another word for that, but yes, there is another word for that.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_02: I think she was like, I she's not a mean girl.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I don't think she was trying to be mean.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_02: I think she was just maybe a little lost in her theology.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_02: Anyways, but you know, I feel like you have to really get to like the root of why you feel unworthy.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_02: And for me especially, it was just hopelessness and comparison.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_02: And I remember kind of like at my lowest, I went and saw a Christian counselor.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_02: And I write about this in the book, but I was like kind of like sharing and like unloading and like telling her all of my anxiety and all the things.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_02: And I got done, and she was like, Okay.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm gonna tell you what she told me, and this is what I would encourage you in.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_02: She was like, Go serve someone, it's like gonna make me emotional.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Oh, I don't think you heard me.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I can't get out of bed, like I can barely function, like I'm not doing okay.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_02: She's like, Yeah, I hear you.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_02: She's like, I would just challenge you, like, go serve someone else.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, that was so profound in my journey because here's what happened when I started Hope and Fertility Support Group, and I got outside of myself, you know, and it's easy to play like the woe is me game.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_02: Like I was there, I did it all the time.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_02: But when you start serving other people, like it all of a sudden becomes less about you.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_02: And you're focused on other people, and all of a sudden, like I had purpose for my pain, right?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and I was still suffering, but like it seemed better.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, I feel better when I'm helping others because it takes the spotlight off of me.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_02: And my counselor was right, you know, like I needed to just like get out of bed, put my shoes on, and you know, just like try to live life because you know, there are periods of time where you can lay in bed and just kind of like be depressed, but then life goes so fast, it's like you can't do that all the time.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you gotta get out there and you have to be a warrior and you have to do hard things and suffer well, right?
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_02: When I started to feel like I had control over how I suffered, like no one could take that from me, right?
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, some of like the most incredible, most accomplished people that you look at in the world and history all have hard things that they went through.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_03: We all have hard things, yes, and I think infertility is just one of those things, and you're not promised no suffering, right?
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you just don't know what kind of suffering, and sometimes you get all the suffering together, yeah, and that's really hard.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_03: And then you have to go harder for like, okay, do hard things, but do the hardest things now.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like, get out, get going, get going, um, and keep moving forward.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_03: Sometimes I say one step at a time, even one breath at a time.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_03: You gotta keep going.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_03: And no matter what, you just gotta keep moving forward.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_03: I've heard that several times um on friends that are depressed.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_03: That was really good advice.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_03: Always serve someone, get out of your own head, go do something for someone, anything you want.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_03: Learn if you're going through IVF and you found this amazing way to do the shots, to administer the shots, write a little blog and throw it out there.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_03: Let's it will be very well received because a lot of a lot, there's not a lot of information still.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's still so often not very talked about.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_02: I had friends that would come over, one of my girlfriends would come over.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_02: She had children, so this was like she did IVF for two, and then she was trying to do IVF for her third, and we like made it fun.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_02: Like she came over and I would give her her shots, and we'd like before school, like do a little party.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_02: I wish I had that.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, if you don't have friends and you don't make it fun or funny, and if you don't laugh at yourself, like when you're just like, I've got a bleeder, you know, like what are these butt shots?
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_02: Like these needles are aggressive.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you just you have to make it fun and silly.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: And maybe you're kind of like haha laughing now, but I promise you, when you're on the other side of it, it will some of it will seem funny.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, eventually.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_03: Eventually, I know.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_03: So, do you guys have any questions?
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_03: Anyone or anything you want to add to the conversation?
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: My my question, how would you say that you like have to balance in your marriage of like the topics with your husband and like being honest about how you're feeling, but also not making it be everything that you talk about always?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, that's a really hard one.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_03: And I I I think I it's very, very hard because what happens when you're going through infertility and you're going through those treatments, you're 100% like tunnel vision on it because it runs your life.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_03: You've got this appointment you've got to go to, you're working around this schedule, counting the days, you can't travel, you gotta stay in town.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_03: If you go to a party, you're drinking water.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's like there's so it affects so many things about your life, but for the woman, not really for the man.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_03: I know, you know what I mean it's it's just it it just is what it is.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_03: So you gotta put on that good face, you gotta change the subject somehow.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_03: Cause sometimes you you do have to find a balance.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_03: It's just super hard to do that.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_03: Think about something, maybe like start a hobby that you guys have never done that's so new.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's what I was gonna say.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_02: I know it's interesting with our journey because Lane was dealing with you know, health, a health crisis, like as I was dealing with a health crisis, which is really unique.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_02: It is unique.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_02: And so I would say that one of our favorite things, and we still like now with the kids, we can't do it, but like we would at night ride bikes together, and we would just talk, and in like the darkness, like in the coolness of the night, we'd ride bikes, and it was like therapy for us.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_02: So I would say I think Lindsay's spot on.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_02: I think like finding a hobby, pickleball, get out of the house, get out of that environment, like go find something odd to do.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_02: Do pottery.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know, take salsa dance lessons, just do something that's not talking about infertility and something that you guys can like do together and that it's fun and funny, or even like I mean, bike riding wasn't fun or funny, but it was just like therapeutic.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I'd literally put wine in a solo cup and we would just ride, and it was just like we would just talk about our day, and you know, you're not looking at each other, you're kind of like doing something, and it that we love that.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_02: I wish we could still do that, but we can't.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_02: That would be my advice.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: I guess I have a question that kind of parallays into that.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: How did you or how can like husbands best support the wives going through like their infertility infertility or IVF or because there's a lot of hormonal aspects to it too, which make it, you know, yeah, you feel that more unstable.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_03: I always love the answer, just give love and and be there for support.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_03: Anytime you're going through a hard time, check in, make sure, hey, are you okay?
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_03: You know, little things just be there for love and support, as much as little, not hounding, not overbearing, fixed.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, not trying to fix, just listening.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_03: Love and support, just listening, checking in, making sure doing a shot with them, like doing a shot for them, like trying to be all in.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_03: I I don't know.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_03: Do you have anything to add for that?
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_02: No, I would agree.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_02: I would just say I feel like Lane is great.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_02: He has all sisters, and so he's just very like compassionate and intuitive.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_02: But like, you know, when he was struggling with his stuff, like he was like totally checked out.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_02: And he was saying, like, later on, he was like, you know what?
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_02: I don't even know if I was like ready to have a kid, like I was not ready for a child, but I was just so like in it.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, no, we have to like have a child as he's like struggling.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_02: So I don't even know if like he was necessarily that like crazy emotionally supportive, but it was just like, you know what, just no, we're on the same page and we're like, you know, a team.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_02: Um, we're going in the same direction.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_02: And I think maybe like doing like the fun hobby stuff, like when you can find something that's just you two, I think it allows you maybe to like talk about some of that stuff and not like such a serious format, right?
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_02: You're not like you're playing pickleball and you're just kind of like, yeah, today sucked, you know, like I cried a lot, and you know, just like you're able to like share it in an environment like that and not like you're like sitting down after dinner, like okay.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_02: Because I think maybe they'll get a little the guys will get a little intimidated if you're kind of like and to your point.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I think and I know I was guilty of this, I think probably a lot of us are we don't want to pour out our hearts, like we don't really we want to act like we can keep it together, you know what I mean?
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_03: Not like hey, you know what?
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just I'm really sad today.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like I I I just feel like this and I'm just not having a good day.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_03: Maybe say that.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_03: Like instead of just trying to act like everything's fine, trying to be translucent, a little more vulnerable, yeah, vulnerable to your husband, too, to allow them the support.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_03: Because sometimes I feel like I was probably guilty of not uh allowing him to support me.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_03: Sure.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_03: Trying to keep it all in my own lane to not affect his work or you know what I mean?
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it is such a nuanced answer because every couple is so different, right?
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_02: And like everyone's communication style is so different.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_02: But I mean, it's hard.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_02: We get it.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_02: Well, if there's no more questions, we gotta do the giveaway.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_03: Drum roll.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_03: And while you do that and you double check on everything, get everything ready.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_03: I just wanted to let everyone know that um Whitney and I will be putting together an email.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_03: We do have your email addresses, and we'll be sending out information on our grant season, which starts September 1st, it closes November 15th, and all of the grant awards are given um by December 15th.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_03: So we'll have one annual fundraiser that we that we uh do to raise however much money we can, and however much money we raise, we're gonna give it away.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_03: So we'll keep you posted on that.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then of course, if you have any questions at all, please feel free to reach out to us.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, drum roll.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_02: Lindsay, you are the winner.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_02: Woo! Yeah.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_02: I've got a really soft, very nice, comfortable minky headed your way.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_01: Perfect.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_02: And a gift card.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_02: It might be coming to you, it might be staying with me.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_03: It is very soft.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_03: I haven't tried the minkies, but it is amazing.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, we're obsessed.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_03: We fight over them.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_02: See, all the kids have one.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_02: I sleep with one every night.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_02: I shouldn't say that, but I do.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_02: I sleep with a weighted blanket every night.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_02: I do too.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_02: It's very nice.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_02: I wish I could pack them.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_02: They're just a little too big for traveling.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_02: Well, we just wanted to thank everyone so much for coming on today.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_02: If anyone else has any questions that they wanted answered that we didn't talk about, I know there was like so many more that we got, and I mean we could keep going, but we want to be respectful of your time.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_02: But we can obviously kind of talk one-on-one with you.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_02: I know Lindsay will send out the newsletter, like she was saying, of just information on how you can apply for a grant if you guys if that's something that you guys are interested in.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_02: If anyone ever needs to meet one-on-one, I'm always available.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_02: So that is my heart, and I love it.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_02: So please don't hesitate if you'd want to grab coffee and kind of share more about your individual story.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_03: But I hope everyone has a great night and we really enjoyed this.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_03: And it was healing for us too.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: So thank you guys.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_03: Have a great night.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_01: This was awesome.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, bye girls.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_02: Talk to you later.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for joining us on today's podcast.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_02: If you have been impacted by this episode, there are two things you can do for us.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_02: First, is leave a review on Spotify or Apple Music.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_02: And second, is to share this with a friend who is struggling.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_02: This helps us to spread our message of hope for others.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_02: If you would like to get in touch with Lindsay or myself, please message us on Instagram at Infertile Diaries Podcast.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_02: Or you can go to our website at Whitneyheneman.com and everyone deserves a family grants.com.