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Spiritual Things You Must Never Tell Anyone · Off The Kirb Ministries

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This might surprise you, but when I was a fresher at
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university, I was probably one of the worst students on the
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campus. I was the guy, literally first
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week of freshers week, who heckled the lecturers trying to
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look like I was some cool, funny guy.
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But really, I just had a big chip on my shoulder.
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I was trying to to look like I was popular.
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I was loud. This mouth was so rude.
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I used to say things to the girls.
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I used to be a flirt, all kinds of things.
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In my first year, I was not a very nice person, very arrogant.
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That's what I was known for, being arrogant, starting fights,
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all of that kind of stuff. Anyway, in the summer, the Lords
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brought me back to himself. It was actually for a
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chastisement. I had a problem with the the
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bone in my ankle, something called a vascular necrosis,
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which basically means death to the bone.
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And what basically can happen is when your bone loses the blood
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supply, then the joint can collapse and that's it.
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You're on a on a stick, You've got a walking stick.
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And now in the end, I prayed for the Lord to heal me.
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And I do believe there was a healing because for some reason
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I've got no problem there. And at the time I was struggling
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to walk. When I went back to university,
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I knew I had a lot of making up to do.
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I had to show people that I was a Christian now.
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And you know what? It was one of the greatest
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testimonies, despite, you know, what the Lord has done on
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YouTube, despite doing evangelism and preaching in
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churches, What God did at university in that second year,
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I just give all the glory to him.
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And there was a verse actually, that that helped me through all
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of this. This was the verse that that
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really changed everything. In Proverbs 17, verse 28, it
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says even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace.
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When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.
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So what was my secret to how I showed everyone that I'd
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changed, That the Lord had done a work?
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Suddenly this mouth which had got me into all kinds of
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trouble, this arrogant mouth, I was just quiet.
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I was silent all of the time. I would only speak when it was
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absolutely necessary. And I did tell people I'd come
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back to the Lord. In fact, what makes this even
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worse is in my fresher year, people knew that I was a
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supposed Christian. And it was like, why are you as
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a Christian acting like this? But you know when it says that
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even a fool is is counted wise when he holds his peace, when he
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doesn't open his mouth. I actually remember it was so I
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was doing this so much that, you know, these same lecturers that
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I would hackle sometimes when I was so quiet, they would
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actually stop their lecture and say, Joe, what's your opinion on
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this? And one said, you know Joe,
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you've always seemed like you're quite wise and the
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transformation was just incredible in what in what God
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did in that time. And I suppose the the greatest
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testimony is this. I remember 2 girls coming up to
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me and saying, Joe, you've changed so much, basically God
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has done a work in you. And one of them said you're just
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so quiet and and shy and nice now.
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And anyway, I just want maybe you to consider this because
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there is actually an art to hold in your tongue.
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There is actually a reason why you shouldn't tell people
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everything, why you shouldn't tell people what you're up to,
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why you shouldn't give your opinions all of the time.
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But why, as a Christian, it's very, very important actually to
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sometimes be the quietest person in the room.
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So on that note, you know what time it is?
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It's time for a a cup of Joe. So I've got my coffee today.
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It's just the same coffee that we're on.
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I think it's an Italian one from booths, so please do pause the
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video at this point. Put on the kettle.
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If you're having black coffee with me, please do.
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Maybe you're a cup of tea fan, or maybe you just want to to get
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a fizzy drink. A soda?
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Whatever it is, pause the video. Have a drink with me, because
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we're going to have a look at this idea of holding our tongues
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and coming to the Lord quietly. OK, another verse I'd like to
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read to you. If you've got a Bible there,
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please would you turn to Ecclesiastes chapter 5 and verse
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3? And if you're a bit embarrassed
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you can't find it, don't worry, I can't find it either.
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I knew it was after the proverbs, but when you're on
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camera and sometimes when you preach at the front, your mind
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starts to second guess yourself and you're thinking, is this
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correct? Can't get this wrong in front of
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all these people. OK, Ecclesiastes 5, verse 3 for
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a dream comes through much activity and a fool's voice is
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known by his many words. If you were going to write
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something down today, please write this down.
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Empty vessels make a lot of noise.
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Empty vessels make a lot of noise.
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This is actually something that I did learn at university.
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One of the lecturers taught me this phrase and what he meant by
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that was, you know, sometimes people who might not be the the
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sharpest tool might not be the brightest smart spark.
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I I can hold my hand up and say that about myself, that they are
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so full of their own opinions, so full of their own ideas.
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Often they can make a lot of noise, you know, lots of shouts.
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And just like if, you know, this coffee pot was empty and I put a
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little piece of gravel, a little stone in it and make a lot of
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noise as you shake it around. And it's so with these people
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who they don't have much going on inside.
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There's not much depth to them, and yet they're so loud.
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They're so vocal. I don't want to be that person,
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and I know you don't want to be that person either.
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Something else that's quite interesting.
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And now I would love to know what country you're watching
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this from in the world. Please just let me know in the
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comment box, But if you don't know yet, I'm from the north of
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England and in England we also have a north-south divide and
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something that Southerners often will say about Northerners,
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which I've got to say, the stereotype is true.
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When you meet a Northerner within the 1st 5 minutes of
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talking to them, they'll tell you their entire life story.
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They'll tell you all the people who've wronged them, any
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childhood pain, the man who left them, the person who did this,
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the the man who did. They'll tell you absolutely
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everything. Where they live, how old this
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house has been, what job they worked, absolutely everything
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within the 1st 5 minutes. And you think, well, just hold
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on a second. You know some of these things, I
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can't believe you're telling me these things.
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Some of these things are so private and yet we need to just
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be aware that we don't have to share everything.
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I don't know if that's something in your own culture that people
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do and it is good to wear your heart and your sleeve.
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We do want to be transparent, but at the same time just just
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hold back. Something is it should just be
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between you and your spouse. Something should be just between
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you and your family. Some things that should just be
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between you and the Lord. I always remember one of the
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holiest men I know. I've said this before, There are
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two holy men I've come across in all of my life, and one of them
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was my father. And I shouldn't really say that
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publicly because it sounds like I'm boasting.
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But he honestly was the greatest example of a man of God, so
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consistent in his quiet times. Again, completely opposite to
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me, quite a quiet man, just very wise and just, yeah, the way you
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love my mother. Just a wonderful example.
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You know, that's the greatest gift the Lord's given me is, is
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godly parents. And the second one was an elder
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at the church that I I used to attend.
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I won't name his name publicly and I remember he once said from
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the pulpit. And it really struck me.
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There are some things that I cannot even tell my wife.
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There are some things that I struggle with that I can only
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tell the Lord. And I think there is a lesson in
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that. There's nothing wrong in that.
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Sometimes there are things, there are burdens that are too
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big, that there are stones, if you like, just like the Lord
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God. He rolled away that stone just
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just when Jesus, you know, rose from the dead, he moved it.
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No man could move that stone away.
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There was no man in his body that could push it away.
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Only God could push it away. And sometimes there are some big
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stones in our lives that only God can push away and that's why
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we give it to him. Now, the reason I'm doing this
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video today is because I've actually had quite a bad day.
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So I'm having a coffee with you. But there's a verse for today
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that I really want to share with you that I need to hear today.
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And perhaps as someone watching today who needs to hear this.
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Verse two, it's Proverbs 29, Verse 11.
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I'll just have a little bit of coffee while you turn there.
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Proverbs 29, verse 11. Proverbs 29, verse 11.
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A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.
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Now why do I need to share that verse with you today?
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So today someone said some very slanderous things about me.
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Yeah, some things that just aren't true.
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And this person's been doing this for a for a while now.
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And there's a big part of me when I first saw, oh, he's done
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it again, he's done it again. There was a massive part of me
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that just wanted to, you know, basically publicly shaming
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because, you know, in my flesh thinking, you know, I could say
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this to that person. I could say that that would
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stump him. He wouldn't know what to do.
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And even there was a part of me that, yeah, just wanted to say
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just to, yeah, I won't go there. But you know what I'm thinking?
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And I was just very, very angry. But this verse has really hit me
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today that a wise man holds them back at times.
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There are times we just want to make that person who's made us
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look stupid. We want to just wipe the floor
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with them. We want to railroad them.
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We want to show them that. How dare you mess with me.
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You're messing with me. Do you know who I am?
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Do you know? Do you not think I've got a
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sharp mind? Do you not think I can stick up
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for myself? All these prideful, sinful,
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arrogant thoughts bubble up. But then we remember the Lord
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Jesus Christ who was led like a lamb to the slaughter.
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Quiet like a sheep before, as shearers, is silent.
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There was no guy on his mouth. He was quiet.
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And at times we need to be that wise man that the Proverbs talks
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about. We We need to be quiet, and we
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need to remember if this person is speaking wrong about us.
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Know this Vengeance is mine, save the Lord.
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And if they've done injustice to us, the Lord will act justly and
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something will happen to that person.
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Something will come into that person's life.
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If they're a believer, the Lord will chastise them like I was
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chastised, or something will happen at some point.
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We believe in a God that is just.
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And yet, if it is true for what this person's saying, there's
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also a time for us to reflect and quietly think.
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Is what that person said accurate?
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Is there any truth in this? Why is the Lords allowed this to
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happen? Maybe I need to just quietly
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reflect and think. Am I in the wrong here?
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So there is a lot of wisdom in in in holding back.
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Now the key verse. OK, another really key verse for
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today that I want to share with you is again in the book of
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Proverbs. I really recommend if you've not
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made yourself familiar, familiar with the book of Proverbs, then
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please just just read through it.
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Just everyone who I've known that's had some level of wisdom
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has really been familiar with the book of Proverbs.
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And it's something, again, I know I'm talking a lot about
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university. I had a tape, like, not even
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like ACD, literally an old fashioned, like cassette tape
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that I played in my old banger of a car.
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And I just played it on repeat over and over again.
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The Proverbs being read out until it's sunk in.
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And these verses, you know, they become part of you and and you
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need those things. You need those lessons because
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we need to act wisely. So Proverbs 10, verse 19, just
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look at that with me, please. In the multitude of words sin is
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not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise.
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And I would like to suggest to you, today there are four ways
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that we can speak too much and thus cause sin in the multitude
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of words. We can commit transgressions by
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speaking too much. The first one is this.
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You want to write this down. Religious boasting We have, we
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all have this idea inside of us that if we somehow tell people
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what we're up to, if we tell people, you know, all of our
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Christian activity, somehow that's making us seem more holy,
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Somehow people will think better of us.
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Whether it's fasting, you know, you know, you might say, you
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know, I'm fasting this week because I'm, I'm wrestling with
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the Lord over a particular issue.
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We like to share these things, don't we?
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Some people say, oh, this morning the Lord woke me up at
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4:00 AM And I went into the prayer closet and I prayed and I
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met with the Lord God. And it was wonderful.
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And other people might say, oh, I've been out in the open air
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this week. You know, I was there and I was
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preaching the gospel and I was letting people know.
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And and you know, there was 4 decisions for the Lord and many
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souls were saved. And you know, we emptied hell
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that day because we went out and we took the gospel out.
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Or some people in this modern world, they might say, oh, I put
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out this video and I got 10,000 views on the video.
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All glory to God. Look what God is doing.
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And the question needs to be asked when they're saying these
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things. And I could be wrong in this.
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I might be, you know, wrongly speaking now.
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But are they really giving glory to God when they're saying these
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things? Or are they actually trying to
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draw attention to themselves to bring some kind of validation
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that, wow, you got 10,000 views on a video.
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Wow, you led 4 souls to the Lord.
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Wow, you're you're fasting or I haven't fasted in a while.
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You really are a man of God. You really are a woman of gods.
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And then there's something else that we tend to do as well, that
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there is a danger and it's name dropping.
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Sometimes we might like to say, oh, the pastor came over to
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visit me, or, you know, there's that respectable Christian, that
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evangelist or that missionary, and, oh, they've been writing to
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me. Or, oh, I've got his number and
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he's been texting me. I was on the phone to name a
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famous preacher. We do like to name drop, don't
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we? And yet the Bible says that God
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is no respecter of persons. God hates it when we look at
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another person and put them up on a pedestal, because he alone
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deserves the glory. He alone is the one that we
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should worship. Another verse that is really
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applicable to this. We're actually now in the
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Gospels, Matthew chapter Matthew chapter 6.
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If you turn there with me, Matthew 6, the Sermon of the
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Mount and verses 16 to 18, please would you read that with
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me? Moreover, when you fast, do not
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be like the hypocrites with a sad countenance, for they
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disfigure their faces, that they may be appear to be fasting.
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Assuredly, I say to you, they have their rewards.
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But you, when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, so
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that you do not appear to men to be fasting, but to your Father,
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who is in the secret place. And your Father, who sees in
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secret, will reward openly. Do you see the lesson there?
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When we fast, we just do it private, just on our own.
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It's just me and you, Lord. And if there is a blessing to
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come, if there is an answer to prayer, the Lord will reward us
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openly and everyone will see about it again.
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I remember Precious Preacher years ago when I was a very,
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very young man and I was doing open air work.
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I'm not boasting as I say that, but we were doing an open air
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mission week and the preacher at the front said if you've got
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your quiet time and your meeting with the Lord privately and
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you're praying, the private will soon become public because
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everyone will be able to tell what's inside you out of the
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abundance of the heart. So the mouth speaks and if you
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are spending time in private with the Lord, everyone will be
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able to tell. So don't be the the kind of
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Christian who's like, I'm doing this, I'm doing that.
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Even preachers, we see preachers and they they do they disfigure
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their faces. They oh, I'm, I'm so sad that
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you know I won't do impressions. But they act like, you know,
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they they they put on a fake cry or they put on a fake feat of
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anger. If those emotions come, let them
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come. Let the Lord.
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Let the Holy Spirit work. There's nothing wrong with
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emotions in the pulpit. We're emotional creatures.
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The Lord's made us that way. But don't force it out.
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Just let these things come naturally.
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And I think that's what the scripture's trying to say here.
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OK, #2. Anxiety and negativity, OK,
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that's something that we can often do with our mouths.
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Or we speak all kinds of things that aren't helpful and we need
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to stop moaning, don't we? I am.
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I hold my hands up. And I I do admit this is me all
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over. I am someone who is very
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anxious, who does worry. And I know that when I enter
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into a conversation, if I've had a bad week, and particularly if
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I'm on my own, like we talked about in one of my last videos,
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and we're talking about being isolated.
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If I'm on my own, I find myself in this negative spiral.
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And so when I do go out and meet people, I can often pour out all
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of my anxieties, all of my worries, and that's not a
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helpful thing to do. Now there are friends, praise
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the Lord, there are friends and family members who we can trust
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and we can be totally honest with.
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And I would recommend if you are hurting inside, please do speak
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to those people. But don't just go around all the
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time talking. Have you heard about this that's
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going on? Have you heard about this
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celebrity of what that person's doing?
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Have you heard about this? And it's always just so negative
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all the time. The scripture says death and
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life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it
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will eat its fruit. So what am I trying to say?
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I'm just trying to say that there's life in this tongue.
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We can encourage people, we can help them.
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You know, one of the best things you can do to to be a good
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friend or to be a loving person is just ask people how was your
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week and listen to them. If they want to be negative and
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offload, that's great. If they need to do that, that's
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great. But what we're trying to do as
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believers is we're trying to just be that positive light, to
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show them there is life in US. There's eternal life.
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The Lord God is. It is living inside of me.
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Here is the life of God living in the soul of man.
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And God has saved me and so I have a joy, I have a hope and I
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just want to share it with the whole world.
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OK And the 3rd way that we can sort of speak too much and and
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act sinfully is through rude humor.
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Please just tell me is there too many Bible verses in this?
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Now obviously the the most powerful thing we have is the
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scripture, but just tell me if I've got you flicking around too
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much and you just want me to stick to a few.
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Please let me know in the comments section.
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But Ephesians 5, verse 4, this is a very challenging verse,
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neither filthiness nor foolish talking nor coarse jesting which
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are not fitting but rather giving thanks.
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So here the Apostle Paul is talking to the Church of Ephesus
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and he gives a whole list of of sins that should not be named
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among the Saints that Christians should not be doing.
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And one of them is that kind of rude humour.
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I'm going to share something again, very personal with you.
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As you can probably tell, this is just really me talking as a
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friend to a friend. But two of my very good friends
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recently were were talking and one of my friends said something
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that was, you know, a bit close to the edge, a bit close to the
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knuckle, a bit rude. And my other friend said,
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listen, you cannot say, and it was about me as well.
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It was to do with me. He said you cannot say that to
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Joe, You know, he will not find that funny.
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And then the other friend said, yeah, the old Joe.
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You couldn't say that kind of thing in front of the old, old
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Joe, but this Joe now, I think he'd probably find it funny and
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that probably out of anything this year, that's probably been
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the most challenging sign that I'm not where I once was.
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And I need to sort it out because maybe in the last couple
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of years I have got a bit too involved with what we call lad
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banter. And I have got a bit, you know,
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silly. And some of the things that I've
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been laughing at have not been honourable before the Lord I
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even remember, I don't know if you you, you have been watching
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the the main channel for many years off the Curve Ministries.
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Remember back in 2020 I did a video and it was about the
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things that we shouldn't say as Christians and one of them was
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Bible jokes. Because I truly do believe, you
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know, when we laugh at the word of God and we make these jokes,
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you know, we say things, even just trivial things, and we're
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laughing at them. I think it does it it it it
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brings down the word of God and it makes it less honourable and
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it gives Chris a non Christians permission to not take the word
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of God seriously. And yet I found myself even
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making a few Bible jokes myself and maybe even in some of the
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videos recently and I just want to publicly apologise for that
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and I need to get myself sorted. So over to you.
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Are you someone in? When you're at work, When you're
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you know you're with your your friends, your mates?
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Do you say rude things? Do you say silly jokes?
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Do you take the word of God? Irreverently?
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The Bible says here we we mustn't.
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Now that doesn't mean we can't have a sense of humour, you
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know, There's clean sense of humour and there's nothing more
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wonderful than having a good, a good chuckle.
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Butty, as my friend Vinny Commons would say, there's
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nothing better than having a good laugh with friends.
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And there is, you know, a holy sense of humour.
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You know we can joke about having a cup of Joe.
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I know that's not that funny, but I find it funny.
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But you know what I mean? We can joke about things like
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that. There's nothing wrong with with
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having a good laugh. The Lord made humour.
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And I do believe in the Garden of Eden before the Fall.
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I believe Adam and Eve would have laughed.
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I believe it's not a product of the Fall having a sense of
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humour. No, Laughter is is a gift from
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God. So let's enjoy it.
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But let's make sure our laughter is wholesome.
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OK, #4, I'm not going to talk on this for very long at all, but
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it's gossiping, as you know. I've made a full video on that,
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and I'll tell you where that is in a in a moment's time.
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But we're going to turn back to Ecclesiastes.
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Ecclesiastes chapter 10 and verse 20.
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Do not curse the king, even in your thoughts.
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Do not curse the rich, even in your bedroom, for a bird of the
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air may carry your voice and a bird in flight may tell the
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matter. As I said, I've talked about
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this in the other video, but it is this, this imagery, isn't it?
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That if you're just gossiping, if you're, you know, running
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your mouth and talking about someone, the Bible's saying,
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now, this won't literally happen, but it's using a
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metaphor. A bird might just hear what
25:36
you've got to say, might just gather it in its wings, fly off
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and it'll fly and sit on the windowsill of the person that
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you're gossiping about and suddenly they'll hear.
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In other words, gossip often gets back to the person.
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I've got a very good friend and one day he was working and he'd
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done a full day's work. It was a manual job.
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He was really, really tired. And his boss is driving him and
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his other Co workers, his other work colleagues home in the back
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of the van. And then his boss just says, oh,
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actually, there is another job, come on, we've got an come on,
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can we just do another hour? Let's just do another job.
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And you know, it's getting late now, it's like 6:00 and and the
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guys are just ready to eat some food, to have their their tea,
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their dinner. They're really hungry.
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And so my friends, who was a Christian, started texting his
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other friends saying, oh, he's so selfish.
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He's such a rubbish boss. He's this, he's that, he's he's
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lazy. We always do all of this and
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said some really horrible things about him.
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And and then presses send suddenly ping the boss's phone
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goes off. Oh, oh, it's a it's a message
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from you that's interesting. Oh, wow.
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Well, that's hurtful. Wow.
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You really think that about me, do you?
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And by accident, my friend had text the message to this boss of
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his. And of course, guilt came over
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him, and he regretted all that he'd said.
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The point is this gossip does get back to people often, and we
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just need to be very careful what we say.
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So that's my list of four things, four ways where we can
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tell people too much, what we're up to, where we can, you know,
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say some sinful things, and how our our mouth can get us into
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all kinds of trouble. So let me ask you now, what
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might you add to this list? What would you put on on your
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list? What?
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What kind of things do you think can get us into trouble?
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Is there anything I've missed? Please just leave it in the
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comments section and then also please do let me know what kind
27:49
of videos you would like me to make in the future.
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As you know I'm I'm going to let you into a big secret now.
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And this is for those of you who stuck around right to the end.
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You're the true true friends of this ministry.
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I'm only teasing. The other guys are great too.
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But I will tell you this, I actually am enjoying these
28:08
videos more than my main channel.
28:09
I really do look forward to making these, not only because I
28:12
get to drink coffee, but I just really just find it.
28:16
You know, this this literally took me 20 minutes to do and I
28:19
can just share some things with you and just share the scripture
28:23
versus my other video that I've filmed just this morning.
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It took me 3 days to to research, to get it all together
28:30
and that's before the editing. So I'm really enjoying this
28:33
channel and I really hope the Lord will bless it and I hope
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it's blessing you. So please just pray for this
28:38
work. And yes, please do let me know
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if there's anything you would like me to cover in the future,
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because any topic I'm, I'm willing to do it.
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And the other thing is, yeah, if you're new here, please do
28:50
subscribe. And if you would like to see
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that video all about gossiping, I'll put it up here on the
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screen now and please do click there.
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God bless you all and thank you for watching.
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And I hope you're enjoying the rest of your coffee, because I
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certainly am too.