Latest / Who Did What Now With Katie Charlwood / 142. Harmen van den Bogaert
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Hello, delicious friends, and welcome to Hooded What Now the
- 0:04Speaker 1: history podcast That's not Your History Class with me your
- 0:07Speaker 1: host Katie Charlwood, History Harlotte and reader of books. Speaking
- 0:12Speaker 1: of books, I only got one book when I was away.
- 0:15Speaker 1: The entire time I was on tour. I only bought
- 0:18Speaker 1: one book and that book was about a cemetery in Salem. Like,
- 0:23Speaker 1: that's what I got. It was signed by the author. Okay,
- 0:25Speaker 1: so you know it's all good. Normally I buy books
- 0:29Speaker 1: when I go places, and I had great plans to
- 0:31Speaker 1: go to like bookstores and stuff, but it didn't materialize
- 0:35Speaker 1: that way because wow, I had a fun, fun trip,
- 0:39Speaker 1: but it was a good time and I had a great,
- 0:41Speaker 1: lovely time with people, and it was just so nice.
- 0:45Speaker 1: It was actually really really nice. On my Albany and
- 0:49Speaker 1: Syracuse shows got canceled in the middle of it, but
- 0:51Speaker 1: was not optimum. But it is what it is, and
- 0:56Speaker 1: hopefully when I go back it'll be working out, working
- 1:01Speaker 1: out for the whole thing. So yeah, two things I
- 1:05Speaker 1: want to talk about before we get into stuff. The
- 1:07Speaker 1: first one being I am no three things. The first
- 1:11Speaker 1: one being I am very tired. I returned from North
- 1:15Speaker 1: America last night I am not entirely on this plane
- 1:20Speaker 1: of existence, I fear, but here I am because I
- 1:23Speaker 1: got recorded to do because I missed last week's episode.
- 1:26Speaker 1: So you will be getting a bonus episode at some
- 1:28Speaker 1: point this week. It might even be the weekend. Whom's
- 1:32Speaker 1: to say, but it'll be happening. Okay, wonderful, glad that
- 1:35Speaker 1: we discussed this. So that's the first thing. The second
- 1:39Speaker 1: thing is, I have a survey. The link is like
- 1:41Speaker 1: down at the bottom of all of the all of
- 1:45Speaker 1: the notes for the episode, so it's down there. There
- 1:48Speaker 1: is a survey. A cast want a survey if you
- 1:52Speaker 1: want to support me and to make sure that we
- 1:54Speaker 1: have ads that are relevant to us, you know, decent
- 1:59Speaker 1: one offul kind ads, respectful ads, maybe not respectful. They
- 2:03Speaker 1: can be smitty little adds, hymns to say, but they
- 2:06Speaker 1: won't know who descend to me if you don't answer
- 2:09Speaker 1: the survey. So that would be really so helpful. And
- 2:11Speaker 1: I know everybody in their granny is asking you to
- 2:13Speaker 1: do a survey, but seriously, though, please do it for me,
- 2:16Speaker 1: and I would be greatly greatly appreciative of it. Like
- 2:20Speaker 1: I know what's annoying. I know it's a cumbersome, but
- 2:22Speaker 1: please just do it. The third thing I'll remember in
- 2:25Speaker 1: a second. My brain isn't put in I remember now Canada. Oops,
- 2:30Speaker 1: I'm in Canada. So the plan is to do a
- 2:33Speaker 1: Canada tour, but like in lots of tiny venues, like
- 2:37Speaker 1: lots of small venues, you know, and sort of go
- 2:41Speaker 1: from left to right, sort of west to east. I'm
- 2:46Speaker 1: having to like picture a map in my mind because
- 2:48Speaker 1: I'm so terrible at geography. But the plan is to
- 2:51Speaker 1: go from like one set of Canada to the other
- 2:55Speaker 1: because Newfoundland is like a three er plane ride away
- 2:59Speaker 1: or something like it's not long, you know. And so
- 3:02Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that wouldn't be too bad. So
- 3:05Speaker 1: I was going to like go from the far side
- 3:07Speaker 1: of Canada to the near side of Canada, you know,
- 3:11Speaker 1: and do that. So small venues, like little places I
- 3:15Speaker 1: just thought'd be really fun. I want to get some
- 3:17Speaker 1: community centers, church halls, somebody's garden shed will make it work,
- 3:23Speaker 1: an amphitheater, whatever you've got, like, let's let's do this.
- 3:27Speaker 1: So that's going to be next year. So I'm already
- 3:28Speaker 1: planning next year. Also, if anybody wants to let me
- 3:31Speaker 1: sleep on their couch, so I don't have to pay
- 3:33Speaker 1: for hotel bills. Mercy Boku and thank you. Okay, so
- 3:39Speaker 1: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, quit your jibber
- 3:42Speaker 1: jabber in fact me, in fact you y well. But
- 3:45Speaker 1: first we've got to get our source on. Our sources
- 3:48Speaker 1: are New Amsterdam's gay scene, The Queer Case of Hammond
- 3:53Speaker 1: Vandenburght an early NYC by Kim Dramer, The Island of
- 4:00Speaker 1: Center of the World, The Epic Story of Dutch Manhattan
- 4:03Speaker 1: and the Forgotten Colony that shaped America by Russell Shorto.
- 4:07Speaker 1: A Journey into Mohawk and Oneida County sixteen thirty four
- 4:11Speaker 1: to sixteen thirty five. Hammond Mendurtz van de Burgrut, Indian
- 4:17Speaker 1: Affairs in Colonial New York the seventeenth century by Alan W. Trulie.
- 4:23Speaker 1: The Strange Case of Hammon Mendurtz van der Burgrut by
- 4:27Speaker 1: Tobias Seaman. And of course we have our old favorites,
- 4:31Speaker 1: History dot com and biography dot Com. I use it
- 4:35Speaker 1: in comfortably good. Then let's be gain Okay. So before
- 4:40Speaker 1: I get into anything else, I just want to say
- 4:43Speaker 1: this was going to be the Albany Show because I
- 4:45Speaker 1: thought who wouldn't want to hear a story about a
- 4:50Speaker 1: Dutch gay guy colonizing exploring North America. And I thought,
- 4:56Speaker 1: that's interesting. I haven't done that yet. And this was
- 4:59Speaker 1: going to be the albany S. But here we are.
- 5:01Speaker 1: I guess everybody gets to hear it now, so sometimes
- 5:05Speaker 1: things don't mark it, but here we are. So so
- 5:09Speaker 1: herman was born at some point he was born we
- 5:14Speaker 1: think sixteen twelve. Like that seems to be like the
- 5:18Speaker 1: guestimation that we've got, like aligning what he says his
- 5:21Speaker 1: age is in like other places, this seems to be
- 5:25Speaker 1: the way of it. We know little to nothing about
- 5:28Speaker 1: his childhood except he was born, you know. That's it.
- 5:34Speaker 1: That's what we have. I think from his name, I
- 5:37Speaker 1: think he's like from South Holland, out of everywhere. Granted,
- 5:42Speaker 1: the Netherlands was different back then. Borders change, things are odd.
- 5:48Speaker 1: I mean, Belgium was also part of the Netherlands at
- 5:51Speaker 1: one point it was a whole thing anyway, So the Dutch,
- 5:56Speaker 1: the Dutch for such a small country, for the Netherlands
- 5:59Speaker 1: being so donny diny, they really did invade a lot
- 6:04Speaker 1: of places, like it's like England, like the English had
- 6:07Speaker 1: empire the French had an empire and then the Dutch
- 6:11Speaker 1: had an empire. Like really, but you're sho schmoln and
- 6:15Speaker 1: you're so chill. They're chill now because I think they
- 6:17Speaker 1: just kind of got over you know, the looting and whatnot.
- 6:22Speaker 1: And I'll probably cover the VOC at one point, which
- 6:24Speaker 1: is the Dutch East India Company. Yeah, that's that's another
- 6:29Speaker 1: kettle of fish. So the first record we have of
- 6:32Speaker 1: Herman is when he's eighteen years old and he is
- 6:35Speaker 1: a barber surgeon. And you might be thinking that's two
- 6:39Speaker 1: different professions, and you would be wrong. You know, a
- 6:43Speaker 1: barber surgeon. Yeah, they were a barber and a surgeon. Listen,
- 6:47Speaker 1: they're using the same tools. That's basically the same thing, right,
- 6:51Speaker 1: The same thing they're using to like shave your beard
- 6:54Speaker 1: is the same thing they're using to you know, amputato limb.
- 6:58Speaker 1: That's why you know those poles that are outside barber
- 7:01Speaker 1: shops and they have the red and white like stripes
- 7:05Speaker 1: that go round and round and round. Allegedly that's from
- 7:10Speaker 1: them like drying bandages on the outside. And that's why
- 7:15Speaker 1: you would know that was a barber surgeon. So yeah,
- 7:18Speaker 1: that is that was one job they thought, that's fine
- 7:22Speaker 1: that the man can do both. Get yourself a man
- 7:25Speaker 1: who can do both, you know. And so he sets
- 7:29Speaker 1: sail eighteen years old on the ship Indracht and he
- 7:32Speaker 1: is heading to New Amsterdam. He leaves from the island
- 7:36Speaker 1: of Texel and he's heading to find his femine fortune. Yes,
- 7:42Speaker 1: so he is heading to the Dutch colony of New Amsterdam,
- 7:45Speaker 1: which is now New York because initially the Dutch they
- 7:50Speaker 1: managed to colonize at first how to thunk it. So
- 7:55Speaker 1: this barber surgeon, he makes his way across the Atlantic
- 7:59Speaker 1: and all the way the Hudson River. They think you're
- 8:02Speaker 1: a Biba sulgeon. You're clearly handy to have around. And
- 8:05Speaker 1: so he is placed in the Hudson River trading post
- 8:08Speaker 1: at Fort Aranya. So like Fort Orange, but now this
- 8:14Speaker 1: is Albany. This is where Albany is. So you've got
- 8:18Speaker 1: the fort and in the fort that's like your military.
- 8:21Speaker 1: That's your army guys, that's those dudes. So like adjacent
- 8:26Speaker 1: fort adjacent sort of in the area, you have the
- 8:30Speaker 1: rans Illiswick Colony and so these are here because this
- 8:33Speaker 1: is where the two rivers fork in Albany. So this
- 8:36Speaker 1: is all sort of rolled over by the Dutch Republic,
- 8:40Speaker 1: so that they're colonizing this area. Okay, now, not to
- 8:44Speaker 1: speak well of colonizles, but compared to the rest of Europe,
- 8:50Speaker 1: the Dutch Republic was, you know, relatively progressive, Like in
- 8:56Speaker 1: the sixteen hundreds, it was probably the most culturally diverse
- 9:00Speaker 1: US as well, which isn't saying a lot, but it's
- 9:03Speaker 1: saying something. So, yeah, the Dutch Republic as far as
- 9:08Speaker 1: seventeenth century European countries go. Yeah, yeah, fairly progressive, fairly,
- 9:15Speaker 1: fairly progressive. They had you know, free trade, They had tolerance, unfortunately,
- 9:25Speaker 1: like a lot of other colonial nations, ah, very much
- 9:33Speaker 1: into the murder of indigenous people, which do not support
- 9:37Speaker 1: let's not let's not do that. That is objectively a
- 9:41Speaker 1: bad thing to do, objectively a bad thing to do. Yes,
- 9:47Speaker 1: I said it twice because I think it was worth repeating,
- 9:52Speaker 1: because you know, genocide aside. Compared to like the Puritans,
- 9:59Speaker 1: pretty going the Dutch, you know, because in fairness, the
- 10:04Speaker 1: Puritans have come up quite a bit recently, haven't they
- 10:07Speaker 1: any excuse for me to say they were as miserable
- 10:09Speaker 1: a sin if sinning was allowed, and the Dutch Republic, chill, progressive,
- 10:16Speaker 1: totally tolerant unless you are a homosexual and you're thinking,
- 10:20Speaker 1: really the Dutch, Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm as shocked
- 10:25Speaker 1: as you are. Like that was the one thing that
- 10:28Speaker 1: they were just kinda like, no, no waggling the finger
- 10:33Speaker 1: at it, going down with this sort of thing. Careful now.
- 10:37Speaker 1: So the settlement and the fort like they were in
- 10:40Speaker 1: need of a barber surgeon. I don't know why, but
- 10:43Speaker 1: I feel like the surgeon part may have been more relevant.
- 10:46Speaker 1: But Hymn's to say, so they're like, hey, we need you,
- 10:49Speaker 1: and so he shows up, as one does. And like
- 10:54Speaker 1: the settlement itself, it has the same problems that most
- 10:57Speaker 1: of them have at the time, which is like everybody's
- 11:01Speaker 1: absolutely sloshed. Like it's easier to drink beer than it
- 11:05Speaker 1: is to drink water, and so everybody's drunkenness is quite common,
- 11:10Speaker 1: you know. And then you've got smuggling, loads of smuggling
- 11:15Speaker 1: because apparently the free trade wasn't quite free enough. I
- 11:19Speaker 1: mean it was putting people in debt. So I mean
- 11:20Speaker 1: there was that speaking of trade. For Iranya, it was
- 11:26Speaker 1: like the epicenter of the fur trade, and it's basically
- 11:33Speaker 1: it was where the Mohawk and the Hudson rivers like joined.
- 11:38Speaker 1: And that's the thing with these rivers. It meant that
- 11:40Speaker 1: it was a fairly easy route, like that was how
- 11:44Speaker 1: you traversed the place. And so they did, and so
- 11:47Speaker 1: you would have Mohawk traders shown up to trade in
- 11:52Speaker 1: for pelts. And so the Mohawk Nation and the Dutch
- 11:57Speaker 1: Republic had a fairly decent, like real relationship. They had
- 12:00Speaker 1: like a strong trade relationship, which is as strong as
- 12:07Speaker 1: greed allows it to be. I'm speaking from the colonial
- 12:10Speaker 1: side obviously, And so they had this fairly like decent
- 12:14Speaker 1: business relationship with them. And they would then you know,
- 12:18Speaker 1: take the far and they would send it down to
- 12:20Speaker 1: like Manhattan on New Amsterdam, and they would sell it
- 12:24Speaker 1: there and make a pretty penny. And so things are
- 12:27Speaker 1: going well, you know, bustling trade. You got far going
- 12:32Speaker 1: over the place. And then and then at one point,
- 12:35Speaker 1: the fur trade it gets pretty thin, like they're not
- 12:39Speaker 1: getting as much like pelts from the Mohawk anymore. And
- 12:44Speaker 1: so they're like, hey, this river leads to the French.
- 12:50Speaker 1: And so they're convinced that like in this area and
- 12:52Speaker 1: this big lake where all the beavers are, yes, beavers.
- 12:56Speaker 1: This is if you were at the Toronto Show. Beavers
- 13:00Speaker 1: are back, baby, And so the Dutch are convinced that
- 13:05Speaker 1: the Mohawks are now trading with the French and that's
- 13:08Speaker 1: why they're not getting any pelts. So like for pelts
- 13:12Speaker 1: are it's not like the fur itself. It's like under
- 13:17Speaker 1: the first it's like a softer bit, which is where
- 13:19Speaker 1: everybody's hats came from, because you've got like chapeaus and
- 13:23Speaker 1: those big Puritan bucket hat things and top hats eventually
- 13:27Speaker 1: are made of the same thing. So like it was
- 13:30Speaker 1: all made from like beaver pelt, well not all, but
- 13:33Speaker 1: like a decent amount, and like beaver pelts are the
- 13:37Speaker 1: entire reason that the Dutch, you're actually like there, like
- 13:41Speaker 1: they're there for the beaver. The Dutch are there specifically
- 13:45Speaker 1: for the beaver. And every everybody's after the beaver, the French,
- 13:50Speaker 1: the Dutch, the English, probably the Germans. Everybody just loves beaver.
- 13:56Speaker 1: And so, after four years of being at Fort Ranya Harmon,
- 14:00Speaker 1: who is clearly clearly doing something right because he's twenty
- 14:05Speaker 1: two years old and he has been tasked with going
- 14:10Speaker 1: to find the Mohawk settlement and figure out what the
- 14:13Speaker 1: fuck is going on with the lack of beaver, Like
- 14:16Speaker 1: are the French getting all the beaver? Stop giving beaver
- 14:19Speaker 1: to the French, Like that's his whole purpose, that's his goal.
- 14:22Speaker 1: And they're like, yeah, buddy, you go do that. So
- 14:26Speaker 1: he's he's trying to make his way there. And here's
- 14:28Speaker 1: the thing. The Mohawk and the Mohicans they are there
- 14:34Speaker 1: at war, and like the Dutch had been told like
- 14:37Speaker 1: do not take a side when it comes to tribal war,
- 14:40Speaker 1: just like don't do it, like this is not your battle.
- 14:43Speaker 1: You do not have a horse in this race. And
- 14:46Speaker 1: then and then of course, at one point was it
- 14:51Speaker 1: I'm trying to think like eight years earlier at this
- 14:53Speaker 1: point eight years yeah, but eight years earlier, this Dutch
- 14:57Speaker 1: fella was like no, no, no. This captain was like,
- 15:01Speaker 1: I'm gonna support the Mohicans when they're going to raid
- 15:05Speaker 1: Mohawk territory. And like the whole party gets ambushed in
- 15:10Speaker 1: like a bunch of the dudes or just straight up slaughered,
- 15:14Speaker 1: and it's like, yeah, that's what you get for going
- 15:17Speaker 1: to war in their territory. And so like since this point,
- 15:22Speaker 1: because the captain and like three other Dutch dudes got killed.
- 15:25Speaker 1: Now there's a whole thing. It's like the mohawks like
- 15:29Speaker 1: ate them now, the mohawks are not cannibals. That's just
- 15:33Speaker 1: bullshit propaganda by colonials, colonists not colonials. Fuck it, I
- 15:39Speaker 1: don't care. So basically, this whole thing goes out and
- 15:42Speaker 1: they were told, hey, don't fuck with them, right, and
- 15:47Speaker 1: this is very much a fuck around and find out situation.
- 15:50Speaker 1: And so like the Dutch, they hadn't like entered sort
- 15:54Speaker 1: of Native American territory since then. I mean technically it's
- 15:57Speaker 1: all Native American territory, you know, because they were there first.
- 16:03Speaker 1: But anyway, they were like, you're going to go venture
- 16:07Speaker 1: into this area where notoriously, we have been murdered for
- 16:11Speaker 1: venturing into this area. And he's like, absolutely, buddy, let's
- 16:15Speaker 1: do this. And so Harmon he's ready, ready because he's
- 16:19Speaker 1: twenty two and doesn't have a clue, and he's like,
- 16:21Speaker 1: I am going to absolutely rock this shit. And so
- 16:25Speaker 1: he decides that he's going to go on this expedition,
- 16:28Speaker 1: which is the nicest wagon think of seeing it. And
- 16:31Speaker 1: he decides to do it in winter, which I'm sorry
- 16:38Speaker 1: I've been to that part of the country. I don't
- 16:41Speaker 1: think traveling through there in winter seems like the best idea.
- 16:46Speaker 1: So he decides he's going to do it instead of
- 16:49Speaker 1: waiting till spring, which I don't know might be the
- 16:53Speaker 1: most reasonable option. But instead he's like, no, no, no, no, no,
- 16:57Speaker 1: I'm going to go now. This is clearly so important.
- 17:00Speaker 1: Cannot wait. You guys need your beaver. You need your beaver,
- 17:04Speaker 1: and I won't let you down. I will venture forth
- 17:09Speaker 1: and find the beaver for you. And after everyone is
- 17:13Speaker 1: in agreement to this clearly incredibly reasonable plan, they head
- 17:18Speaker 1: out on December eleventh, sixteen thirty four. And so he
- 17:24Speaker 1: and two other vellas they are going on this expedition.
- 17:29Speaker 1: You have Villain Thomasin and Uronymous de Lacroix. YEP. Now
- 17:37Speaker 1: they're not completely foolish. They do have Native American guides.
- 17:43Speaker 1: They have indigenous people guiding them through you know, the
- 17:48Speaker 1: area which is theirs. And so they go forth in
- 17:53Speaker 1: the journey for at least half a day. I'm not
- 17:57Speaker 1: entirely sure how long. I'm not sure what time of
- 17:59Speaker 1: day they left actually, but by the time they get
- 18:03Speaker 1: to like the end of their first day, they camp.
- 18:06Speaker 1: They set up camp in the forest in a wooded area,
- 18:09Speaker 1: and they're like, yeah, this is great, let's do this,
- 18:12Speaker 1: and so they do. And then in the middle of
- 18:15Speaker 1: the night, Harmon wakes up his sleep is disturbed by
- 18:20Speaker 1: the sounds of their two indigenous guides packing up and leaving,
- 18:26Speaker 1: and so he wakes up sees their going, and he
- 18:30Speaker 1: just starts like waking up the other two dudes, so
- 18:33Speaker 1: Uronimus de Lacroix and Villain thomasin He's like, wake up, boys,
- 18:37Speaker 1: wake up boys, we gotta go. And so like they're
- 18:41Speaker 1: just like packing up and trying to follow the two guides,
- 18:46Speaker 1: and so they're like we are gone, like we've got
- 18:49Speaker 1: to chase them. We've got to follow them, because you know,
- 18:51Speaker 1: they're freaking out. And so the guides had dogs with them,
- 18:55Speaker 1: and the reason that they had decided to leave was
- 18:58Speaker 1: because their dogs had gotten into the provisions, because they
- 19:02Speaker 1: have like a ton of provisions with them. They're like,
- 19:04Speaker 1: we're gonna be prepared because it is winter and we're dumb,
- 19:09Speaker 1: but we're not that dumb, all right. And so they're
- 19:12Speaker 1: there with their like cheese and meat because god, the
- 19:16Speaker 1: Dutch love their cheese like they love their dairy but
- 19:20Speaker 1: they really love their cheese. That's why they're so tall.
- 19:22Speaker 1: They've got such strong bones from all of the dairy
- 19:26Speaker 1: because them bones, them bones need calcium. Dim bones, them
- 19:30Speaker 1: bones need calcium. Dim bones, them bones need calcium. And
- 19:34Speaker 1: that's a natural law. So yes, the dogs had gotten
- 19:39Speaker 1: into the provisions and they ate all the meat and cheese,
- 19:42Speaker 1: and the kites are like, ah, shit, we're gonna be
- 19:45Speaker 1: in trouble. I'm in danger, and so they and they
- 19:52Speaker 1: have to just like like leg it. They're like, oh no,
- 19:55Speaker 1: we better cooke because we're just gonna be in the shit.
- 20:00Speaker 1: But like, here's the thing. They're one day away. They're
- 20:03Speaker 1: one day away. They could just go back, like you're
- 20:08Speaker 1: one day you've been gone for less than twenty four hours,
- 20:12Speaker 1: just turn around and go back and get more fucking
- 20:15Speaker 1: meat and cheese. Like what are you doing? This is
- 20:18Speaker 1: not the end of the world. But anyway, as they
- 20:23Speaker 1: continue forth, as they continue forth, like they bump and
- 20:28Speaker 1: they bump, they come across some mohawk people and the
- 20:34Speaker 1: mohawks are so like shocked to see like the Dutchmen
- 20:40Speaker 1: that they just like drop their packs and just run.
- 20:43Speaker 1: So they're like, hey, they're like they dropped loot and
- 20:47Speaker 1: so great, they dropped food and they've got something at least,
- 20:52Speaker 1: But again, why wouldn't you just go back? You've been
- 20:55Speaker 1: away less than a day, Like that's just pride point,
- 21:00Speaker 1: like like where is the rationale? And so these Native
- 21:05Speaker 1: American guys that had just like dropped the stuff they
- 21:09Speaker 1: like went and hid in a swamp like and these
- 21:12Speaker 1: guys are just like, great, I'm gonna eat all their food.
- 21:16Speaker 1: And so they're just like eating like bread and beans
- 21:19Speaker 1: and they just scoff it down as if they haven't
- 21:21Speaker 1: eaten in like weeks. They're just dang just like really
- 21:26Speaker 1: shoving in. And there's imagine these people just like these
- 21:30Speaker 1: guys have shown up, you've gone to hide, and you're
- 21:33Speaker 1: just watching them just like shovel bread and beans into
- 21:35Speaker 1: their mouth like that's gonna be an interesting story to
- 21:40Speaker 1: bring back home. And remember this is like North America,
- 21:45Speaker 1: so like North North America, like it is it is
- 21:49Speaker 1: cold in winter, the snow is falling, and in order
- 21:52Speaker 1: for them to get where they need to go, they
- 21:54Speaker 1: have to cross a freezing but not frozen river by
- 21:59Speaker 1: wading through it. So they have to like actually step
- 22:03Speaker 1: in the freezing cold water and make their way across
- 22:07Speaker 1: the river, like and I'm not entirely sure how deep
- 22:10Speaker 1: it is, like like is it going all the way
- 22:13Speaker 1: up to the waist like or are we talking? Oh heck,
- 22:18Speaker 1: it's up to my neck scenario. Okay, sidebar. There's this story,
- 22:24Speaker 1: this song actually from the singing kettle. Lead handle, no
- 22:30Speaker 1: spout handle, lead of metal wats inside this thinging kettle,
- 22:39Speaker 1: and there would be a song. And so this one
- 22:41Speaker 1: was like, I've been eaten by a boa constructor and
- 22:45Speaker 1: I don't like it one bit. Oh no, he's nibbling
- 22:50Speaker 1: my toes because it's a milk constrictor obviously. Oh no,
- 22:54Speaker 1: he's nibbling my toes. I'm being eaten by a boa constructor,
- 22:59Speaker 1: and I don't like it one bit. Oh geez, he's
- 23:02Speaker 1: up to my knees. Oh fiddle, he's up to my middle.
- 23:08Speaker 1: And then it goes and then it's like, I'm dead,
- 23:11Speaker 1: couz eas eating my head. I'm dead, giz eas eating
- 23:16Speaker 1: my head. I've been eaten by a boa constrictor, and
- 23:20Speaker 1: I don't like it one bit. So they're wading through
- 23:25Speaker 1: this icy cold river, which, oh fiddle, could be up
- 23:28Speaker 1: to their middles. Hymns to say, and they have to
- 23:31Speaker 1: make their way through and oh, oh, I know those places.
- 23:35Speaker 1: Those boys would not want to get frosspite, if you
- 23:38Speaker 1: know what I mean. And so they are middle deep
- 23:41Speaker 1: in frozen river water and they make their way out
- 23:44Speaker 1: the other side, and so they have to continue journeying
- 23:47Speaker 1: on in their wet, cold clothes, like it's like what
- 23:54Speaker 1: are they wearing as well? Like their pantalons are just
- 23:58Speaker 1: like like sand paper against their very raw Dutch skin,
- 24:05Speaker 1: like yeah, yeah, And so they're going and they make
- 24:08Speaker 1: their way to the top of the hill and finally
- 24:11Speaker 1: what do they say, a large mohawk village and there's
- 24:17Speaker 1: like thirty two houses and like some of them are
- 24:22Speaker 1: like long houses, so what two hundred feet long, and
- 24:27Speaker 1: so there's like thirty two of them all together, and
- 24:30Speaker 1: they're like, hey, this is a fairly decent settlement in
- 24:33Speaker 1: this clearing. Let's go there. So Harmon he would actually
- 24:42Speaker 1: be like the first sort of European person to actually
- 24:46Speaker 1: document these people and document their lives. So like he
- 24:51Speaker 1: gets to this village and Hodenoshaney, which is like basically
- 24:58Speaker 1: if you see anything that's the Iroquois, the Iroquois or
- 25:02Speaker 1: the Iroquois like, that's what the French called them, so
- 25:06Speaker 1: that would be the Iroquois confederacy of tribes. But they
- 25:10Speaker 1: called themselves the hodenoshine which basically means people love the
- 25:15Speaker 1: long house. And that apologize to any Native American people
- 25:20Speaker 1: to whose names are absolutely Butcheran, I did practice, but
- 25:26Speaker 1: I fear it may not have been enough. So this
- 25:30Speaker 1: sort of confederacy of tribes. It was the Mohawk, the Seneca,
- 25:37Speaker 1: the Oneida, the Onondaga, and the Cougar. So theyre all
- 25:42Speaker 1: make up this like Hodenoshinee group. And so they lived
- 25:49Speaker 1: again in these long houses, some of them two hundred
- 25:53Speaker 1: feet long, as previously mentioned, and they were pretty decent
- 25:58Speaker 1: fucking people. Horror. Yeah, So they were like, oh, look
- 26:03Speaker 1: at you, you're absolutely soaking come to us, let's help you.
- 26:08Speaker 1: And so they are welcomed. So William Thomason, like his
- 26:14Speaker 1: leg is swollen from whatever the fuck he was doing.
- 26:18Speaker 1: He's got a big swollen leg, and so Harmon, being
- 26:22Speaker 1: the barber surgeon, decided to take care of it. And
- 26:27Speaker 1: by taking care of it, I mean he cut the
- 26:31Speaker 1: damn leg open, looked at that wound and went, Yep,
- 26:35Speaker 1: this gaping wound needs to be smothered in beer grease.
- 26:40Speaker 1: That's wrong, bear grease. Beer grease. Oh, let's get the
- 26:44Speaker 1: hops on it. No bear grace. So the mohawk. They
- 26:49Speaker 1: have taken this group in. They've watched this guy smother
- 26:53Speaker 1: beer grease on this dude's leg, and still they are
- 26:58Speaker 1: so kind and considerate. They give them venison beans baked
- 27:03Speaker 1: pumpkin like they're like, hey, let's not have you starve,
- 27:07Speaker 1: you're already bloody frozen. And so they take them and
- 27:11Speaker 1: then they give them like like these lion pelts, like
- 27:15Speaker 1: mountain lion pelts to like sleep in because you know
- 27:19Speaker 1: they be cold. And yeah, Harmon writes that he woke
- 27:23Speaker 1: up with a hundred lice. It does feel like a
- 27:27Speaker 1: little bit of an exaggeration, but you know, if you're
- 27:31Speaker 1: out in those kind of places, you know, and by
- 27:35Speaker 1: those places, I mean the countryside, the wild like you're
- 27:40Speaker 1: in you're in a village and a clearing in a forest, dude,
- 27:44Speaker 1: like you should expect some beast eats, you know what
- 27:47Speaker 1: I mean. But like, I don't know if there was lice,
- 27:52Speaker 1: because it feels like it feels like that when something
- 27:56Speaker 1: like that happens in your tribe. For example, like you
- 28:01Speaker 1: would know how to deal with that and you would
- 28:03Speaker 1: eradicate it as soon as possible. I doubt you'd be like,
- 28:06Speaker 1: here's a dutchman. Oh, let's give him lice, although maybe
- 28:10Speaker 1: he saw like the beer grease wound and was like, actually, no,
- 28:14Speaker 1: let's give this fuck or the lice bear grace. That's
- 28:17Speaker 1: like tallow, and it's just like tallow. And so they're like, yeah,
- 28:22Speaker 1: let's just go from Mohawk village to other Mohawk village.
- 28:27Speaker 1: And clearly the bear grease wound wasn't too awful because
- 28:32Speaker 1: William Thomasin was going along with them, him and Uronymous
- 28:38Speaker 1: whatever the fuck his name was, and so delacrois, yeah,
- 28:43Speaker 1: that's it, Delacroix. And so they're continuing on their journey
- 28:47Speaker 1: in and they're basically going from Mohawk village to like
- 28:50Speaker 1: other Mohawk village, and the Mohawk people are like always
- 28:53Speaker 1: really excited to see them. They're very welcoming, and they
- 28:57Speaker 1: even encourage them to like shoot at things, and they
- 29:02Speaker 1: like to hear them shouting Dutch, although when fyound this
- 29:05Speaker 1: like majiao is not exactly the most exciting thing to hear.
- 29:10Speaker 1: Although I wonder what like all daytime Dutch sounded like
- 29:14Speaker 1: like yah, prima, like I'm sorry. There was too much
- 29:16Speaker 1: emotion in that, because when you speak Dutch you have
- 29:18Speaker 1: to speak at at the shred of your mouth. Is
- 29:21Speaker 1: it a busy If there's no really emotion there, it's
- 29:24Speaker 1: very chill. It's a very chilly thing. Ah, have you
- 29:26Speaker 1: been having enough of the shed lately? Yes? Aim from Holland,
- 29:31Speaker 1: isn't that vade? Sorry? I went often to gold Member
- 29:36Speaker 1: there from Austin Powers three. That was that was a
- 29:40Speaker 1: movie that existed. AnyWho. The Mohawk people like they sort
- 29:46Speaker 1: of knew about guns, but they didn't have any guns,
- 29:49Speaker 1: and so watching them like shoot stuff was a novelty.
- 29:54Speaker 1: It was like, hey, what's this. It's kind of like
- 29:58Speaker 1: when you see fireworks or like for the first time,
- 30:01Speaker 1: and then if you saw like fireworks being shot at you,
- 30:05Speaker 1: it wouldn't be as fun, you know. That being said,
- 30:10Speaker 1: we should have more sparklers in our lives because, like,
- 30:13Speaker 1: see sparklers. Understand that they're a fire hazard and it's
- 30:16Speaker 1: technically gunpowder on a stick. But also where's your whimsy?
- 30:22Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love like sparklers and I've got
- 30:27Speaker 1: a whimsy in my life, you know sidebar, I love
- 30:30Speaker 1: a bit of whimsy in my life. And you know
- 30:33Speaker 1: what's really fun actually is I realized many things about
- 30:38Speaker 1: myself recently, and I was, like, I was thinking, because
- 30:44Speaker 1: I'm so aggressively single, which part of the problem is
- 30:47Speaker 1: probably because I don't make the first move anymore at all.
- 30:51Speaker 1: Because when I noticed, like just from my own observations
- 30:56Speaker 1: and life, that if I'm the first move with people,
- 31:03Speaker 1: like they're along for the ride as opposed to being
- 31:08Speaker 1: an active participant in the situation. And so like, if
- 31:12Speaker 1: someone's interested in me, they need to make that move,
- 31:16Speaker 1: Like that's just it. I need to know that you're
- 31:18Speaker 1: actively interested in me, otherwise I'm not gonna waste my time,
- 31:23Speaker 1: Like I'm I'm used to people like kind of being
- 31:27Speaker 1: casually interested or like again, just being along for the ride,
- 31:31Speaker 1: and I'm past that point in my life and so
- 31:35Speaker 1: and so, like I post it on threads the other
- 31:37Speaker 1: day that I'm that for me to get married, I'd
- 31:42Speaker 1: say it's probably either going to be like at the
- 31:43Speaker 1: Taco Bell in Vegas, because apparently you can get married
- 31:47Speaker 1: in a Taco Bell in Vegas like that, that just
- 31:50Speaker 1: seems like the kind of thing that would happen in
- 31:52Speaker 1: my life because it's so bloody absurd, but also like
- 31:56Speaker 1: my other option is like it was a it was
- 32:00Speaker 1: a challenge on Taskmaster, like that's how I'm gonna get married,
- 32:05Speaker 1: Like people are convinced. I get many marriage proposals. I
- 32:09Speaker 1: get like I don't know, three a month, but they're
- 32:12Speaker 1: never serious. And this someone really wants to get a
- 32:14Speaker 1: green card for Ireland. But yeah, that's that's that. But
- 32:20Speaker 1: anyway back to Harmon, he's in these Mohawk villages and
- 32:26Speaker 1: he is absolutely flabbergasted that they have roads between houses,
- 32:32Speaker 1: like they've made roads probably for like horses and people
- 32:37Speaker 1: to traverse, and they're like what are these This is
- 32:39Speaker 1: wild and like nearly every village had like a bear
- 32:42Speaker 1: in it, and so they're was six days in and
- 32:47Speaker 1: he's like writing in his wee journal and he's like, Wow,
- 32:50Speaker 1: they had a bear that they were fattening. Like they've
- 32:53Speaker 1: got a bear they're fattening up in the village. And
- 32:55Speaker 1: it's like yeah, because it's fucking winter and they're keeping
- 32:59Speaker 1: this bear alive so they can use it at some point.
- 33:02Speaker 1: I mean, you've got the grease obviously, which is for
- 33:06Speaker 1: the wound cleaning or whatever the fuck he was doing
- 33:08Speaker 1: with that, And then you've got fur pelt meat, like
- 33:14Speaker 1: you've got organs, which I'm fairly certain you can make
- 33:16Speaker 1: stock from. I've never had bear stock. I don't know
- 33:22Speaker 1: how pleasant or legal that is, but I'm not. It's
- 33:26Speaker 1: not on the top of my like dining list, considering
- 33:29Speaker 1: I went to Canada and I still haven't had poutein,
- 33:31Speaker 1: like I need to have putein. I eat cheese cards
- 33:34Speaker 1: for the first time, so that was an experience. I
- 33:37Speaker 1: really enjoyed them. Mmmm saldage Juli cheese cards from upstate
- 33:43Speaker 1: New York and I'm delicious. But yeah, So they're fattening
- 33:47Speaker 1: a bear and he's writing about it because he's like, whoaw,
- 33:50Speaker 1: who would have thought they had done it? All the
- 33:52Speaker 1: people who have lived there for thousands of years hyms
- 33:56Speaker 1: to say harmon him's to say he's got one village,
- 34:01Speaker 1: it's got a bear. And then he's in another village
- 34:03Speaker 1: and they're like, wow, they brought me dried salmon and
- 34:07Speaker 1: also fresh salmon. It's like, yeah, there was a fucking river, dude,
- 34:13Speaker 1: They're gonna use it, like yeah, but yeah, he's like
- 34:19Speaker 1: keeping this diary because this is this is like the
- 34:22Speaker 1: first again, the first sort of Dutch settler to like
- 34:26Speaker 1: get this far and to actually document these people. And
- 34:31Speaker 1: so he's just making his way through, writing his way
- 34:34Speaker 1: diary and everything seems to be going hunky dory until
- 34:38Speaker 1: one night, like he writes in his diary that Uronymous
- 34:40Speaker 1: said that somebody wanted to like get him with a knife,
- 34:45Speaker 1: and and well Uronymous is not stabbed at any point,
- 34:50Speaker 1: so woo, whatever happened. There may have been a miscommunication maybe.
- 34:58Speaker 1: So he keeps going along and he gets to another
- 35:01Speaker 1: village where he's helping looking after a sick dude because
- 35:05Speaker 1: he's a barber surgeon. Okay, so he's helping do this,
- 35:09Speaker 1: and then sort of other people show up, like indigenous people,
- 35:14Speaker 1: and they end up calling sunichkos I have a feeling
- 35:19Speaker 1: I've mispronounced that so wrong, which means kind of like
- 35:26Speaker 1: kind of like an exorcism thing, except not weirdly Christian. Basically,
- 35:32Speaker 1: it's to get like the bad juju out, you know.
- 35:36Speaker 1: And so they they have this whole healing ceremony service ceremony,
- 35:43Speaker 1: healing process, all right, and so this is the first
- 35:46Speaker 1: time again, this is the first time this has been documented,
- 35:49Speaker 1: you know. So they put snake skin around their heads,
- 35:55Speaker 1: they wash their hands and faces, and the sick person
- 35:59Speaker 1: is taken and then laid before like a bonfire, so
- 36:03Speaker 1: like a really big fire. And there's a bucket of
- 36:07Speaker 1: water which is like got medicine in it. It's some
- 36:12Speaker 1: kind of healing. In my head, I'm saying potion, and
- 36:16Speaker 1: I'm like that feels incorrect and also vaguely racist. But yeah,
- 36:20Speaker 1: there's basically medicine in the bucket of water into which
- 36:26Speaker 1: they dip a stick into it. So they dip a
- 36:28Speaker 1: stick into the medicine water, and then these two guys,
- 36:33Speaker 1: the two in each courts, they like put the stick
- 36:39Speaker 1: in their mouths, like down their throats, and then they
- 36:42Speaker 1: both vomit onto the sick guy's head and then over
- 36:52Speaker 1: the rest of his body, so they puke on him.
- 36:55Speaker 1: And then they do this performance that sounds wrong. No prayer,
- 37:02Speaker 1: prayer sounds to colonial. Ah. Yeah, and so I don't
- 37:10Speaker 1: know the word I should know the word. This is.
- 37:12Speaker 1: This is bad. This is bad form for me. But yeah,
- 37:16Speaker 1: so they are like clapping and raising their voices and
- 37:23Speaker 1: and they're like sweating because the sweating is supposed to
- 37:27Speaker 1: show like the bad stuff leaving the body, and then
- 37:31Speaker 1: this sick guy was cured. So this like healing ritual again,
- 37:37Speaker 1: first time it was ever documented, And so Harmon sees
- 37:40Speaker 1: that and then writes it down. Of course he does,
- 37:43Speaker 1: but this wasn't like the only healing ritual he saw.
- 37:46Speaker 1: You know, I'm just gonna like read directly from his
- 37:48Speaker 1: stuff for a second. That's what I'm gonna do. So
- 37:53Speaker 1: I'm just for giggles, I'm gonna do it in a
- 37:56Speaker 1: terrible Dutch accent. Then we ad the floor of the house,
- 38:01Speaker 1: which completely covered with tree back over which the devil
- 38:03Speaker 1: hunters would walk. They were old men who were all
- 38:07Speaker 1: painted with red paints on their faces. In the middle
- 38:10Speaker 1: of this house was a very sick person who had
- 38:13Speaker 1: been languishing for a long time, and there sat an
- 38:15Speaker 1: old woman who had an empty tutor shell in her hands,
- 38:18Speaker 1: which the beat that rattled when she shank. Here they
- 38:21Speaker 1: attempted to get the devil and tremble him to death,
- 38:24Speaker 1: for the oistumped in the bark in the house to
- 38:26Speaker 1: pieces ardomach jumping and running. Oney of them went to
- 38:31Speaker 1: the shik version and took an otter fell from his
- 38:33Speaker 1: hand and for a long time, they shocked on the
- 38:36Speaker 1: shick man's neck and back. He then spit on the
- 38:39Speaker 1: otter and threw it in the ground, running away with
- 38:41Speaker 1: great excitement. The man then went to the otter. Other
- 38:45Speaker 1: men that ran to the otter and performed such antiques
- 38:48Speaker 1: that it was a wonder to she. Indeed, there the
- 38:51Speaker 1: fire ead fire, and through hottages and ambush such a
- 38:53Speaker 1: way that our finally went not of the house. I
- 38:57Speaker 1: think I may have water arks then in a couple
- 38:59Speaker 1: of places. That was a terrible Dutch impression. But it's
- 39:03Speaker 1: from the sixteen hundred, so maybe that's exactly what Dutch
- 39:05Speaker 1: people sounded like in the seventeenth century. You don't know.
- 39:14Speaker 1: So eventually, after days of trekking, they finally make their
- 39:19Speaker 1: way to the final boss, the main Mohawk village, like
- 39:24Speaker 1: the most important place, the place where they're meant to
- 39:26Speaker 1: be so Harmon can negotiate with them. So like every
- 39:32Speaker 1: other Mohawk village they entered, they were welcomed with open arms,
- 39:36Speaker 1: and so they're welcomed in. You know, they go through
- 39:40Speaker 1: like this long house. There's paintings on the wall, and
- 39:43Speaker 1: they are all very well fed. They are treated very well,
- 39:48Speaker 1: and they get a nice way bite to eat. And
- 39:51Speaker 1: as they're they're like the guys, like the indigenous people,
- 39:57Speaker 1: they're just like, what shitty gifts you've brought us? Where
- 40:02Speaker 1: are like the nice presents? And so like they're just
- 40:06Speaker 1: totally like giving out to them. They're making fun of them.
- 40:09Speaker 1: They're just like, what is this shit? Look at what
- 40:12Speaker 1: the French brought us? Look at these fancy French shots,
- 40:18Speaker 1: Like look at these lovely lovely you know, dress shirts,
- 40:22Speaker 1: beautiful shirts, beautiful French and body lovely ten out of ten.
- 40:26Speaker 1: And they're like, oh, no, we didn't bring you nice shirts.
- 40:31Speaker 1: This this was a poor idea, would you We don't
- 40:34Speaker 1: offer you meat and cheese. But the dogs ate them,
- 40:38Speaker 1: and so things just start to get like super tense
- 40:41Speaker 1: because this like lower tribal member, he is just like
- 40:46Speaker 1: giving out shit to these boys. And like it gets
- 40:50Speaker 1: the point that these other mohawks like just surround them
- 40:55Speaker 1: and there's war forty six of them, like Harmon counts
- 41:01Speaker 1: forty six, and so like they were like screaming at them.
- 41:08Speaker 1: They're screaming at the Dutch and they call them and
- 41:10Speaker 1: they quote scoundrels and and thomasin right, So William thomasin
- 41:17Speaker 1: the guy with the wound and the bear grease, Like
- 41:21Speaker 1: he's like a super tough dude. He was a sailor,
- 41:25Speaker 1: Like that's why he was chosen to like join this
- 41:27Speaker 1: mission is because he's tough as nails and he's just
- 41:31Speaker 1: like surrounded by all these people and he just bursts
- 41:33Speaker 1: out crying like season Screetens. He is going, he is out,
- 41:40Speaker 1: and and so Harmon he's like, fuck this for a
- 41:45Speaker 1: game of soldiers and he just starts screaming back at
- 41:48Speaker 1: them and he's calling them scoundrels. And then he's just
- 41:52Speaker 1: like screaming at them and then next thing you know,
- 41:54Speaker 1: the Mohawks they just start laughing and they're just like, oh, whoops,
- 42:03Speaker 1: it was a big misunderstanding. Whips the daisy, and they're
- 42:11Speaker 1: just like, hey, like we were just testing you. Everything
- 42:15Speaker 1: is fine, and they're like, apart from him, he's not.
- 42:19Speaker 1: He is a bit of a wimp. Like that guy
- 42:22Speaker 1: built like a brickshit house. Absolutely, Sobbing probably couldn't last
- 42:27Speaker 1: through an episode of Blowey, right, he would be just
- 42:32Speaker 1: just drenched in his own tails. And so yeah, so
- 42:37Speaker 1: they were just like we were testing you. Everything is fine,
- 42:43Speaker 1: and then I'm an older tribal member comes up and
- 42:46Speaker 1: he puts his hand on Harmon's chest to see how
- 42:51Speaker 1: his heart is beating, and he like is checking just
- 42:55Speaker 1: to see if his pulse is racing effectively. They're like
- 42:59Speaker 1: if he's tear or they just want to check to
- 43:01Speaker 1: see if he's you know, a punk ass bitch. And
- 43:04Speaker 1: so they're like, hey, he's not afraid, yeay and so
- 43:12Speaker 1: and so yeah, the human lie detector like and meet
- 43:16Speaker 1: the focals and now that they are completely impressed with
- 43:19Speaker 1: his manly manliness, like gent manly, the manliest man about town.
- 43:23Speaker 1: Ladies man man man man about town. And so they're like, hey,
- 43:27Speaker 1: you're great. Have some knives and a beaver coat. A
- 43:31Speaker 1: coat made of beaver's not a coat that a beaver
- 43:34Speaker 1: would wear. I mean that's kind of like wearing a
- 43:38Speaker 1: coat made of human skin, which I feel like we
- 43:43Speaker 1: shouldn't do. I also don't think it would be that
- 43:45Speaker 1: pleasant to wear. I don't know, have you felt some
- 43:48Speaker 1: people's skin lately. I just don't think it'd be moisturized enough.
- 43:53Speaker 1: And so yeah, he's got like his beaver beaver coat.
- 43:58Speaker 1: And so they have a wee chech we heart to
- 44:00Speaker 1: heart and it turns out the Horans are the ones
- 44:04Speaker 1: who are working with the French, and that's who was
- 44:07Speaker 1: coming down to like trade the pelts and whatnot, and
- 44:10Speaker 1: the Mohawk they did not really see eye to eye
- 44:14Speaker 1: with the Hourans, and they wanted to be in business
- 44:19Speaker 1: with the Dutch, and so they they made a week offer,
- 44:23Speaker 1: and Harmon he's just sitting there, He's saying nothing, and
- 44:28Speaker 1: like they're trying to make an offer, and he's like, oh,
- 44:31Speaker 1: I don't actually have the authority to like make an
- 44:35Speaker 1: agreement with you, even though they're like the whole purpose
- 44:39Speaker 1: of them going was to negotiate a deal like with
- 44:44Speaker 1: with the Mohawk people. And so anyway, he's like, ah,
- 44:48Speaker 1: I'll go back to the fore and we'll see what
- 44:51Speaker 1: they say. And so they end up giving him a
- 44:55Speaker 1: house and some bear meat. Some sexy time stuff may
- 45:03Speaker 1: have been happening, because Harmon ends up writing this dictionary
- 45:08Speaker 1: of Mohawk vocabulary words and phrases, words like women, man, vagina, testicles, thallus,
- 45:20Speaker 1: and prostitute. So anyway, the Mohawk have given him this deal,
- 45:25Speaker 1: and so him and the two other fellas Uronymous Uronymous
- 45:31Speaker 1: Delacroix and Willem thomasin they head back to Fort Ranya
- 45:37Speaker 1: in late January, and so because they've been away for
- 45:40Speaker 1: that long, everyone thought they were dead, whereas like they
- 45:44Speaker 1: were just put up in a house with some bal
- 45:46Speaker 1: meat and possibly possibly some vaginas and thalluses, I guess.
- 45:54Speaker 1: And so like they get back all the way to
- 45:58Speaker 1: it was at Lake. Yeah, they'd almost got to like
- 46:01Speaker 1: Lake Ontario, Ontario. I mispronounced that. It's fine. And so
- 46:07Speaker 1: they get back and like he gets back and they're like, yeah,
- 46:12Speaker 1: they offered a deal which would completely cut out the
- 46:14Speaker 1: French entirely, and they're they're like super annoyed with them.
- 46:19Speaker 1: They're like, why didn't you just say yes? Like the
- 46:21Speaker 1: whole point was for you to go and negotiate this
- 46:24Speaker 1: with them, and you didn't negotiate with them. Sorry, did
- 46:29Speaker 1: you have to ask your mother permission? Here? So anyway,
- 46:33Speaker 1: this journal of his, like he gets back, everything's so sorted.
- 46:35Speaker 1: They've got this journal and it's like the last the
- 46:41Speaker 1: last entry is like prais and preision then good and
- 46:46Speaker 1: so it's like the twenty versus of January sixteen thirty five.
- 46:49Speaker 1: And then this journal was sent to Killian van Rensselaer,
- 46:53Speaker 1: which was like put in the sort of a collection
- 46:56Speaker 1: of documents in the Netherlands. Now Harmon. Harmon was smart,
- 47:00Speaker 1: but not smart enough to write his fucking name in
- 47:02Speaker 1: the journal. It's only like years later we figured out
- 47:05Speaker 1: it was his. And so yeah, he was seen as
- 47:10Speaker 1: like a pretty like big deal in the settlement for
- 47:13Speaker 1: like a wee while, and I do mean a wee while,
- 47:15Speaker 1: because like three years later, along with a couple other fellas,
- 47:20Speaker 1: he was reported for trading furs like by himself instead
- 47:26Speaker 1: of through the West India Company. And so Rennisleer is
- 47:30Speaker 1: like he didn't like people like being underhand and cheating him,
- 47:36Speaker 1: and he was like he was going to excel people
- 47:38Speaker 1: for not like following his rules and trading specifically through him.
- 47:44Speaker 1: And so he does that and then he sends too
- 47:48Speaker 1: to his to the colony, eight copies of a book
- 47:52Speaker 1: called the Practice of Godliness. So anyway, later that very year,
- 47:59Speaker 1: Harmon has to testifying court because he and a couple
- 48:04Speaker 1: of his drinking buddies were hanging out and the wife
- 48:10Speaker 1: of Thomas Besha showed up and started like pulling out
- 48:15Speaker 1: all their breaches. So I'm sorry, that is not consent.
- 48:18Speaker 1: To norms and enthusiastic consent. Don't go pulling at people's boots.
- 48:22Speaker 1: Are fumble fumbled at the front of the breaches of
- 48:26Speaker 1: most all who were present. And her husband's like, go home, honey,
- 48:31Speaker 1: you're drunk, and she's like, fuck you, and she just
- 48:35Speaker 1: continues doing it, and so and so she's like this
- 48:41Speaker 1: is what she did. Yes, you're getting that divorce now, sir.
- 48:45Speaker 1: So anyway, like this exploring barber surgeoning, like it doesn't
- 48:53Speaker 1: it's clearly not going too well for Harmon, because he
- 48:57Speaker 1: decides to change career and become a pirate. You you
- 49:04Speaker 1: hoe a pirate's life for me, a barber, a sergeant,
- 49:10Speaker 1: an explorer, and a pirate. And so when you're a
- 49:17Speaker 1: professional pirate, you'll be honest, brave, and free of the
- 49:21Speaker 1: soul of decency. You'll be loyal and fair no something
- 49:25Speaker 1: most importantly, when you're a professional pirate, you're always in
- 49:31Speaker 1: the best of company. Anyhow, he ends up joining a
- 49:38Speaker 1: ship called La Gas with a bunch of other dudes,
- 49:42Speaker 1: so Lagas it basically means like bitchy girl and French,
- 49:50Speaker 1: and they're like, we're coming for you, like we're the
- 49:53Speaker 1: mingays ah, and so they he's joined his pirate ship.
- 50:02Speaker 1: He is serving as the barber surgeon because it's a
- 50:06Speaker 1: transferable skill, and so they are heading down to the
- 50:09Speaker 1: Caribbean and they're just like plundering Spanish ships because that's
- 50:16Speaker 1: mainly who's out there. Probably a couple English too, but
- 50:19Speaker 1: you know how it is. And so they go out
- 50:22Speaker 1: for a bit. He makes some money, not a lot
- 50:26Speaker 1: of money, because by sixteen forty he's back in Manhattan
- 50:31Speaker 1: and he ends up hiring a lawyer to get like
- 50:36Speaker 1: some of his teeny whiny wages that were owed to
- 50:38Speaker 1: him by the voc the West India Company all that
- 50:41Speaker 1: called him the Dutch East India Company, and that's not
- 50:43Speaker 1: what that is. And so yeah, and he doesn't have
- 50:49Speaker 1: a lot of cash, but he's got a reputation because
- 50:54Speaker 1: he cut out the French and got more beevils. And
- 50:59Speaker 1: so he up being named the Commissary of Stores at
- 51:03Speaker 1: New Amsterdam and so he's now responsible for all of
- 51:07Speaker 1: the goods going in and out of the colony. And
- 51:12Speaker 1: he gets married and then he goes on to have
- 51:15Speaker 1: four kids and all of the children live. This never happens,
- 51:19Speaker 1: it's the past. And so he lived and worked in Manhattan,
- 51:24Speaker 1: but he still had connections up in Fort Ranya, and
- 51:28Speaker 1: he would go up and visit there like every now
- 51:31Speaker 1: and again. And like one time he's visiting in what
- 51:35Speaker 1: sixteen forty three, and there's this Jesuit missionary called Father
- 51:41Speaker 1: Isaac Jogues and he'd been captured with like two other
- 51:47Speaker 1: French dudes Jug sorry, Father Isaac Jug because he'd been
- 51:51Speaker 1: captured with two other frenchmen and the Hurons by Mohawk warriors.
- 51:58Speaker 1: They cut off both of his thumbs and tore out
- 52:00Speaker 1: his fingernails. I feel like they're sending a message with
- 52:06Speaker 1: that one, like no opposable thumbs for you, and so yeah,
- 52:15Speaker 1: and they keep him for like a year. Now. Eventually
- 52:20Speaker 1: at the Ronslayer Swick, like the at the settlement, they
- 52:23Speaker 1: hear about the kidnapping and they send some people out
- 52:25Speaker 1: and they rescue him. And so he's got no fingernails
- 52:29Speaker 1: and missing both thumbs. But that's not what's causing him problems.
- 52:34Speaker 1: It turns out he got like attacked by a dog
- 52:37Speaker 1: like on the escape, and like he was worried that
- 52:41Speaker 1: he was going to lose his leg that Gangriam was
- 52:43Speaker 1: going to sit in but ender Hammon van der Bergert.
- 52:49Speaker 1: I've forgotten his name already, Hammond vander Burgert. And he's like, hey,
- 52:53Speaker 1: I'm going to come in. I'm gonna smere some bare
- 52:55Speaker 1: grace on this. I got you basic. He just like
- 53:01Speaker 1: cuts out the bad parts. The Jesuit missionary is healed
- 53:06Speaker 1: and once he's feeling better, he goes back out to
- 53:10Speaker 1: spread the word of Jesus Jesus Christ. I feel like this,
- 53:16Speaker 1: this was not a good plan, but there he is.
- 53:19Speaker 1: And a couple months later he was killed with a
- 53:23Speaker 1: hatchet like this priest he got like axed right in
- 53:28Speaker 1: the head. And this was after the tribe was like, no,
- 53:31Speaker 1: it's okay, you can spare him in this dude just
- 53:33Speaker 1: like huh, I'm too late, and so yeah, but he
- 53:39Speaker 1: had helped him out, So yeah, he's he's doing business.
- 53:44Speaker 1: Harmon's doing business. He's cutting out gangreen Is. He's doing okay.
- 53:49Speaker 1: And by sixteen forty two he ends up inheriting a
- 53:52Speaker 1: house because just because they're in the New World doesn't
- 53:55Speaker 1: mean they don't have efficient paperwork. So a guy, an
- 54:00Speaker 1: old Manton, an elderly man, had been decapitated by a
- 54:06Speaker 1: weggy s geek, a Native American tribe then I have
- 54:11Speaker 1: probably mispronounced. And so this house Manhattan, forty seventh Street
- 54:16Speaker 1: and Second Avenue. And so what's interesting is like a
- 54:25Speaker 1: weggy s geek man shows up at the door of
- 54:30Speaker 1: forty seventh Street and Second Avenue, like he knocks on
- 54:34Speaker 1: the door as elderly man opens it, and this dude
- 54:38Speaker 1: just decapitates him because the elderly fella he was actually
- 54:43Speaker 1: part of like a party that murdered this dude's dad
- 54:46Speaker 1: when he was like twelve, and he's like revenge time
- 54:50Speaker 1: found out who it was and you showed up in
- 54:52Speaker 1: just heep cupe. So yeah, Harmon ends up getting the house.
- 55:00Speaker 1: And what did Harmon do with this house? He sold it,
- 55:04Speaker 1: and so yes, he ends up testifying again. This dude
- 55:09Speaker 1: testifies a lot, so he's pals with this dude, Henrik
- 55:13Speaker 1: van Dyke, who was just this a man who could
- 55:18Speaker 1: hold his drink like an Irish rugby player. The man
- 55:22Speaker 1: the man could drink, you know. And so he only
- 55:26Speaker 1: had one working arm though, because the Native American shot
- 55:29Speaker 1: one of them and it was no longer useful. And
- 55:34Speaker 1: so there's this fight between between Henrik van Dyke and
- 55:39Speaker 1: Black Yan. Now Black Yan and Van Dyke. They are
- 55:46Speaker 1: just like they're just drinking together. They're like cheers, cheers
- 55:49Speaker 1: post and then out of nowhere, black Yan hits Henrik
- 55:55Speaker 1: van Dyke on the forehead with a can so van
- 55:59Speaker 1: Dyke being an absolute badass of a man, he ends
- 56:03Speaker 1: up being like sheriff, like sheriff of New Amsterdam. And
- 56:08Speaker 1: so sixteen forty seven, it's July and Harmon is getting
- 56:12Speaker 1: absolutely slashed in a tavern right and Vandyke comes in
- 56:17Speaker 1: like his buddy, Hendrik van Dyke, who he testified for,
- 56:21Speaker 1: and he comes up to him and he's like, what
- 56:23Speaker 1: are you doing here? Like I order you to go
- 56:28Speaker 1: up with her, and Armand's like what's going on? And
- 56:32Speaker 1: like he has no idea why, but he's just been
- 56:34Speaker 1: banned from New Amsterdam. He's been exiled, and he's like, okay, cool,
- 56:45Speaker 1: and so he goes back to the settlement like near
- 56:50Speaker 1: Fort Ronya and so and this is where things take
- 56:54Speaker 1: a turn. So near the end of the year, Harmon
- 56:59Speaker 1: was caught sodomizing his black slave. Tobias. Take this with
- 57:05Speaker 1: a pinch of salt, because there is a massive power
- 57:10Speaker 1: imbalance because this is a slave and an owner. This
- 57:14Speaker 1: person was owned by another person. Now they say that
- 57:18Speaker 1: this act was quote consensual, I I M. Power and balance.
- 57:29Speaker 1: Power and balance, like you own that person. How can
- 57:32Speaker 1: they have consent when like the option to say no
- 57:36Speaker 1: is there? Oh oh I don't. So these these two
- 57:41Speaker 1: are caught and they are both put in jail, So
- 57:45Speaker 1: in voter Arnya, like Tobias and Harmon, both both in
- 57:50Speaker 1: jail because homosexuality super illegal, super legal, the one thing
- 57:56Speaker 1: the Dutch we're not tolerant about. And so yeah, and
- 58:01Speaker 1: it's like a Calvinist court and they have they're very serious,
- 58:07Speaker 1: very serious. Indeed, So a letter was sent to Peter Stuyvesant,
- 58:11Speaker 1: who was the general director of the West India Company,
- 58:15Speaker 1: and he was basically the guy who made all the
- 58:18Speaker 1: laws sort of all the justice was sort of dolled
- 58:21Speaker 1: out by him for New Amsterdam. And so Stuyvesant he
- 58:27Speaker 1: would act like a father over his children in ruling
- 58:31Speaker 1: a colony, which is like someone whose dad, like his
- 58:35Speaker 1: dad was super duper like Calvinist strict and homosexuality was
- 58:41Speaker 1: a sin and so and so he's like, hey, I'm
- 58:47Speaker 1: going to rule on that, but in the spring, I'm
- 58:49Speaker 1: not traveling up to that fort in the winter, Are
- 58:53Speaker 1: you mad? So he's like, no, he's not gonna go
- 58:56Speaker 1: up there. And so Harmon, his career was over, his
- 59:00Speaker 1: reputation has gone, and yeah, he's he's he's going to
- 59:05Speaker 1: be executed. Like that's the situation. So like that's where
- 59:09Speaker 1: we're at here. So like he had arrived, he was
- 59:11Speaker 1: gonna be a babe Asljohn, he was gonna love his
- 59:13Speaker 1: best life and then yeah and then and yeah, yeah,
- 59:20Speaker 1: so even if like what probably gonna be executed because
- 59:25Speaker 1: like the other options are also not great because they
- 59:27Speaker 1: mainly involve like torture, Like the punishments are very much
- 59:32Speaker 1: capital punishment situation, and so you've got like flogging, You've
- 59:39Speaker 1: got you know, burning that maybe they would rip with
- 59:45Speaker 1: their nails out old timey torture methods are are not swell,
- 59:51Speaker 1: you know. And so like his best case scenario actually
- 59:56Speaker 1: is like to be sent back to the Netherlands and shame,
- 1:00:01Speaker 1: because like shame super like important back then, like you're
- 1:00:07Speaker 1: your honor was like the most important thing to you.
- 1:00:11Speaker 1: Like I know that we don't have shame nowadays, so
- 1:00:14Speaker 1: it's really difficult to convey, but like that's that's a thing.
- 1:00:19Speaker 1: So Harmon and Tobias. They decide, hey, all of these
- 1:00:23Speaker 1: options are fucking terrible, and so they decided to make
- 1:00:27Speaker 1: a break for it. And so they break out of
- 1:00:29Speaker 1: jail and they head for Mohawk territory, and obviously the
- 1:00:33Speaker 1: Dutch settlers they're following them. They're given chase. The Dutch,
- 1:00:39Speaker 1: they are like hot on their tails that Mohawk end
- 1:00:42Speaker 1: up taking in like Harmon and Tobias, because they're like,
- 1:00:46Speaker 1: we don't we don't care who you shat. It means
- 1:00:48Speaker 1: nothing does right, whereas the Dutch we're like, we can't
- 1:00:50Speaker 1: let a man have sex or another man and get
- 1:00:52Speaker 1: away with it, and so and so they go in
- 1:00:56Speaker 1: and they managed to catch Tobias but not harm It.
- 1:01:00Speaker 1: So he ends up getting deeper into like Mock territory,
- 1:01:04Speaker 1: and it's the dead of winter, like they don't want
- 1:01:10Speaker 1: to be out there, like the Dutch do not want
- 1:01:12Speaker 1: to be out here in winter, Like this is not
- 1:01:15Speaker 1: where they want to be, but they are so determined
- 1:01:17Speaker 1: to catch this man that they are they are facing
- 1:01:21Speaker 1: general winter, and so off they go and they manage
- 1:01:24Speaker 1: to get him, like he's cornered in a long house
- 1:01:27Speaker 1: where he's like surrounded by like pelts and food and
- 1:01:32Speaker 1: just like tons of storage, and he straight up refuses
- 1:01:35Speaker 1: to surrender, and he does try and escape by setting
- 1:01:38Speaker 1: the house on fire, but he ends up being like
- 1:01:42Speaker 1: caught as he's trying to leg it. They end up
- 1:01:45Speaker 1: taking him back to Fort Orana, and then he and
- 1:01:48Speaker 1: Tobias are just put in the same cell together, after
- 1:01:53Speaker 1: which they very very quickly escaped, and so they leave
- 1:01:59Speaker 1: and they try and head east, and the plan is
- 1:02:03Speaker 1: to cross the frozen Hudson River, like the idea is
- 1:02:06Speaker 1: to like make it to i think the English settlements
- 1:02:08Speaker 1: along the Connecticut River. And so as they're running, clearly
- 1:02:13Speaker 1: the river isn't as frozen as he was hoping to
- 1:02:16Speaker 1: be because as like he's running Herman vand Berrut, he
- 1:02:26Speaker 1: falls through the ice, like he basically goes in he
- 1:02:31Speaker 1: gets stuck under the ice and then he drowns, and
- 1:02:36Speaker 1: the people were chasing him, like, oh, plan is taken prisoner,
- 1:02:38Speaker 1: like they managed to capture to Bias. But like after
- 1:02:43Speaker 1: this there is literally no record of what happens to him.
- 1:02:48Speaker 1: And so in sixteen forty eight, that's the end of
- 1:02:52Speaker 1: Herman Vanderbergut. So here's a little fun fact. Actually, Okay,
- 1:02:59Speaker 1: so the Peter Stuyvesant, the guy who was like super
- 1:03:04Speaker 1: anti gay. He ends up having a farm, and where
- 1:03:09Speaker 1: the farm was is now Greenwich Village, and the location
- 1:03:14Speaker 1: is actually that of the Stone Wall, and so suck
- 1:03:19Speaker 1: on that Peter, and so ends up stolely of Hermann
- 1:03:24Speaker 1: van der Bergutz. So if you liked me struggling to
- 1:03:29Speaker 1: pronounce words because my throat is absolutely fucked, feel free
- 1:03:33Speaker 1: to rate in review five stars. If you don't want
- 1:03:35Speaker 1: to rate five stars, you don't have to say anything.
- 1:03:37Speaker 1: Please do the survey. But I guess it has a
- 1:03:40Speaker 1: recommendation time. I'm gonna go with a bit of silly
- 1:03:47Speaker 1: I think. I think so for reading, I'm gonna go
- 1:03:54Speaker 1: with The Dinner Lady Detectives by Hannah Hendy. It's just
- 1:03:59Speaker 1: some cozy murders with dinner ladies. It's a fun time
- 1:04:04Speaker 1: for watching. If you haven't seen Thunderbolts yet, Asterix, go
- 1:04:09Speaker 1: see Thunderbolts. It's it's just a fun time. It's a
- 1:04:12Speaker 1: good movie. I actually really enjoyed it. But I really,
- 1:04:16Speaker 1: I really do wish I'd gone for a nap that
- 1:04:18Speaker 1: day because I was so tired after just like all
- 1:04:22Speaker 1: of the travel, Like I was just sewed out by
- 1:04:25Speaker 1: the end, even though it was so good like that
- 1:04:28Speaker 1: shows you, I didn't fall asleep after like twenty something
- 1:04:31Speaker 1: hours of traveling, So yeah, that was that was good.
- 1:04:35Speaker 1: And for listening. You know what I've been playing Actually
- 1:04:39Speaker 1: really weird is I've been listening to Sabrina Carpenter's Taste. Yeah,
- 1:04:45Speaker 1: it's just been in my head. Anyhow, You're gonna get
- 1:04:49Speaker 1: like another episode at some point this week, just because
- 1:04:53Speaker 1: I think you deserve it. And with that, I am
- 1:04:57Speaker 1: going to say, for a will so adieus au Revoir,
- 1:05:03Speaker 1: will them my friends? Bye Bye,