Latest / The Woody Show / HIGHTLIGHT POD 30 MINS: The Woody Show September 23rd 2026 Podcast

Transcript

HIGHTLIGHT POD 30 MINS: The Woody Show September 23rd 2026 Podcast · The Woody Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I grabbed the bag and I ran. And as I'm
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: running back, they're paging my name. Uh-huh.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, no.
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: This is The Woody Show. I've shared a number of
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: parenting tips over the years. Things that I have found,
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: my wife and I have found useful over the years.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: You know, when the kids were really little and the
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: ice cream man would come around. Something that I had heard.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: This is not something I made up. It was just
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: something that I heard. And so I'm like paying it
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: forward by then resharing it again. It was, you just
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: tell the kid, and it worked really well on my son.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: He's like, oh, can we get ice cream? And I go,
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: they're playing the song.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: What?
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: I go, when the truck is playing the song, it
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: means they're out of ice cream.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's my favorite.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: So the next time, so.
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: Anyway, the next time that it came around, he's like, oh.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Out of ice cream again?
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: Damn.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: That's hilarious. Always had ice cream.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: And the other thing, now that your stepson's getting older,
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: I felt like this is a good time to share
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: this with Gina, and I'll share it with everybody, too.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: Once your kids are really able to fully understand, they
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: start negotiating and reasoning. Oh, boy. The reasoning. Kids, even
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: little kids, will try to negotiate with you, but when
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: they start to be able to reason... Um, and understand,
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: fully understand you can, you can really do this. You
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: don't have to get mad. You got to remember you're
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: the adult, you're the parent, right? So when you tell
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: them to do something and they go, I'm not doing
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: that or whatever, they kind of smart mouth thing. They, they, uh,
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: hit you back, but they do something that, uh, they're
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: not supposed to do, or they don't do something that
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: they've been told to do. Hey, put away all your laundry, please.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Keep all this stuff up off the floor. I've told
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: you three times. Hey, uh, my wife's big thing is
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: we leave the house at a certain time. And my
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: son has a really big problem with time management. Like
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: we have to leave the house in two minutes. He'll
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: come down, shirt still not buttoned. Let me jump in
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: the shower. One shoe on and he starts like making eggs.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: We're like, what are you doing? What are you doing, dude?
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: We're fine. Like, what do you mean we're fine? Anyway,
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: so we had to set like a drop dead time
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: about be downstairs and ready to go. And if you're not,
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: he just knows that. My wife's going to then send
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: an Uber for him, and he's going to have to
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: pay for it.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: He's got a job.
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: And we take that money right out of his account. Like, hey, man,
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: the train or the plane, it leaves at a certain time.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: If you're not on board, you've got to figure something
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: else out. It's not our problem.
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: Wheels up, baby.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: Remember, parents, you don't have to argue with these people.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: You don't have to get emotionally charged and start yelling.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: And the worst thing you could do, because this is
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: when they know that they got you, is you start
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: throwing out, well, you're not going to XYZ. Well, you
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: know what? You're not going to that birthday party on
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Saturday now either. And they just keep firing you up
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: because they know that they got you. So here's what
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: you do. Next time they do something that is against
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: the rules, instead of saying, well, here's the punishment or
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: getting mad, let's go. All right. Again, they have to
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: be old enough to be able to reason.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: To get it.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: To get it.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: And you go, all right.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: Because at some point, that all right will be all
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: you need to say. Because here's what it means. The
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: next time they meet or ask for something, which will
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: be in the next, I don't know, 24 hours. The
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: next thing they ask for, you just.
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: Go, no.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: And they go, why? You go, hey, remember yesterday?
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: When I X, Y, Z told you and you said
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: or you lipped off or you whatever. That's why. See ya.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Take care. Like a delayed punishment.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: I'm so excited to try this because yesterday we get
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: like food delivery orders sometimes and it's been sitting out
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: for like two hours. I didn't know. And we said
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: to the kid, did you see this when you came
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: home from school? Yeah. Why didn't you take it inside?
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: I didn't feel like it. And I said, now I,
• 3:40
  Speaker 3: first of all, his blood ran cold because I said,
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: what did you, I get quiet and I go, what
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: did you say?
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: I go, okay. And I was like, yes. And I
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: pulled Andy aside and I go, is there anything he
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: needs like in the next couple of days? Cause we're
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: going to say, I don't feel like it. So we're
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: all excited.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: So we're looking for an opportunity.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yep. It's good. It's good. Do you have anything
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: like that, Jeff? I mean, you're, I mean, you're, you're pretty,
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: you're a cool dad. Like I think, and I hear
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: the way, I see the way that you interact with
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: your kids. Uh-huh. Like you're a very loving dad.
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: But they're not best friends.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: But they don't get away with anything.
• 4:10
  Speaker 5: That's for sure. Yeah, yesterday I think you even heard
• 4:13
  Speaker 5: me talking to my son who was in Italy. We
• 4:15
  Speaker 5: talked about how I had to go to the emergency room.
• 4:17
  Speaker 5: And I'm like, hey, by the way, bro, next time
• 4:19
  Speaker 5: can you charge your phone before you go to the
• 4:21
  Speaker 5: emergency room? Why are your phone on 7% during an emergency?
• 4:25
  Speaker 5: I'm like, you couldn't pick up. a cord up or whatever,
• 4:27
  Speaker 5: but I keep it real with boys. I think boys
• 4:30
  Speaker 5: you'll see, you need to keep it like a hundred
• 4:32
  Speaker 5: with them because if not, they're just going to think
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: you're too.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: Cool, you know, and you're your friend and you're a
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: pushover and you're a pushover.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:39
  Speaker 5: So I keep it a hundred with them and I also,
• 4:41
  Speaker 5: you know, give them what they need, but I also,
• 4:43
  Speaker 5: if they don't deserve it, they're not getting it.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And I, I don't cave. My wife caves. So
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: does mine, you know, and they know if they just like, they,
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: they hang in there long enough, she'll eventually get frustrated
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: and just cave. And so that's why I say every
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: once in a while to them, hey, would you have
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: done that or said that to me? No. Well, why
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: would you do that to your mom? Or why would
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: you say that to your mom? And I know the answer.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: I tell my kids, that's the only thing you can
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: tell your kids because it's true. Most of the time
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: when a parent is asking you a question, they already
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: know the answer.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: We want to know if we're on the same page.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: They already know.
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: I want to know if you're lying or not. Yeah. Yeah. Hey,
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: anything happen at school today?
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: We already know.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: It means somebody called. Somebody sent an email. We already
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: know what happened. Yeah. I have another question.
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: Can they be controlled with treats like my dogs?
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: You know, the treat is their phone. Yeah, exactly. That's
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: how you control it. Yeah.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: So again, don't feel the need to start throwing out
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: punishments or things in the moment. Just go, all right, cool.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: Just defer it.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: And then the next time, like, is it cool if
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: I go over to so-and-so's house? No.
• 5:50
  Speaker 4: No.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: I'm not feeling that. Why? Because it's something that's otherwise
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: not a big deal, right? Nah. Hey, because yeah, remember
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: when I said.
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: And you told me.
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: And that's conditioning because any kid can get through a lecture.
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: But if I just hear, okay, I'd be like walking
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: on eggshells for the next 24 hours.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: You're way more patient than me. I try to settle
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: it right in the moment.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: I can't.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I can't wait.
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: I want to try it.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: I'm so excited. Sometimes the long game's good, man.
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah. When they don't know what's coming. That's why I
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: talked about like death row inmates. You don't tell them
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: what the date is. You let them guess. Their victim
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: didn't know that that was their last day. Let them wonder,
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: is today the day or is it going to be
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: next week, next month, whatever?
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: That's the torture.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: And then you mess with them. Like you show up,
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: you bring the chaplain or whatever. And you kind of like,
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: you know, use your, what do they call that? The
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: billy club, the nightstick or whatever to kind of against
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: the bars. Hey, wake up, man. Ah, today's not today.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: Maybe another day. Good night. Yeah, good night.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: You are not on the hot seat.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sleep tight. Yeah, so here are some parenting methods.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: And people sometimes say to me, like, oh, I would
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: never do that to my kid. That's not right.
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: Oh, is that Sammy telling you?
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: I didn't say anything. By the way.
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: I don't think we purposely psychologically torture, but you know.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Let me ask Gina and Jeff. Uh-huh. Isn't that kind
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: of stuff always from the people who don't have kids?
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: A hundred percent of the time.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Anybody who has kids that go, I get it.
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 7:16
  Speaker 3: Because it's, I'm all about, and so are you, like
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: natural consequences. Like you didn't put your shoes on? Well,
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: I guess you're going to school without shoes. You know,
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: it's not, you don't have to fight. Please put your
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: shoes on.
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: Please, please.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: But just in general, people that have opinions about what
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: you're doing. Oh, yeah. Typically are the people who don't
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: have kids.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: Why ever take your kid outside?
• 7:32
  Speaker 4: I don't have an opinion because I just go deaf.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Parenting methods people judge beforehand. They became parents.
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: Oh, let's hear it.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: People were asked that question. They asked parents that question.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: What's something that you judged before you had kids and
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: now you're like, I get it. Somebody said, I used
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: to say, my kids will never eat in the car.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Good luck. Now, my kids don't eat in my car.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: They're not allowed.
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: I was going to say.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: But to say they're never going to eat in any car.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: In a car. Well, because the shuttling around to all
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: the different activities and stuff. Sometimes there's just no.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: Time management. Yeah.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: It's either that or nobody eats.
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Well, my kids would be starving. They would never eat
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: in my car.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: This person said, I pulled a 180 on toddler leashes.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Like the backpack that has the.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Same.
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: Oh, I think they're brilliant. I used to be like,
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: those are cruel and unusual.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: Those are good.
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: If you're at like a big giant theme park. And
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: it doesn't, you know, it could be like the wrist
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: to wrist or whatever, but they disappear.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: And your kid is gone. I'm talking about the little
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: teddy bear backpack and it's got a little tethered to it.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: That's fine.
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: It's fine.
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: So I had a buddy who has kids. He has
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: four kids that I would hang out with and would
• 8:37
  Speaker 4: be out in public and he would see other parents
• 8:40
  Speaker 4: with that leash and he would talk ish to.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Them, to their face.
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: About it and I'm like dude I don't even want
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: to be around.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: You right now I don't know why anybody who has
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: a kid I don't know why it may not be
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: for you and you may choose not to do it
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: but like how you could be so adverse to it
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: like I get it he was very vocal about it
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: like this person said my toddler specializes is an expert
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: into getting the most dangerous situation possible at all times.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Well, Jeff, you were visually turned off by that.
• 9:06
  Speaker 5: I don't really like that method. That's what strollers are for.
• 9:08
  Speaker 5: If they're going to walk away, put them in a stroller,
• 9:09
  Speaker 5: keep it moving.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: I'm not a fan of it. It just reminds me
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: of a dog too much.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: It does.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: That's what he would say.
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: We never did it, but when I see parents with it,
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: I'm like, I get it.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: That's true. So if you love your dog so much,
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: and they have more care for dogs than they do
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: for people, why are dogs on leashes? Yeah, I think
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: it's two different things. Dogs can go in strollers. I'm
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: saying they're as controllable. They have the same brain. Like
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: a toddler is the same like mental capacity as like
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: say like a golden retriever, the golden retriever, an adult
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: golden retriever. Has the same mental capacity, they say, as
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: a human toddler.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: So you still have to.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: Teach them, though.
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: I mean, wouldn't this go back to when anyone says like, oh, well,
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: when we were kids, we didn't have that and we
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: were fine.
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: Like leashes weren't always a thing and toddlers survived. And
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: all the kids were on milk cartons. Thank you.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: My wife and I say no tablets or phones at
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: the table when we go out to eat. But then
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: we changed our mind because we want to be able
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: to sit there and enjoy. a meal or a drink together.
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: True.
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: I'm not there yet.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: That's tough.
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: True.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: Just left the kid at home. Yeah. I used to
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: judge sending your kid to daycare during the day during
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: a day off during the week. So like a parent.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: Like a parent day off.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: I would never judge somebody for that.
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: You know, I used to judge like nannies and stuff hard. Like,
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: you don't want to raise your kid that don't have
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: a kid. And now I'm like, I want the best
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: for my kid. I want someone to interact with them
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: 24 hours a day. I just don't want to do it.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: So I get why somebody would do it.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: Tex says, I judge people who leash their kids until
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I had kids. And now I see why I need
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: my two. My two-year-old needs it. I get it.
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: I mean, to each their own.
• 10:37
  Speaker 5: By the way, I really want to debate that dogs
• 10:39
  Speaker 5: aren't smarter than two-year-olds because I think they are.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: Oh, a lot of them.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, way smarter. Having a kid who only wants to
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: eat chicken nuggets and fries. I always thought, why don't
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: you try to expand their palate a little? Okay.
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: I kind of, well, it depends what kid you have.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: We have a kid who's an adventurous eater, so I
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: don't have a problem with that. But if a kid's
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: a super picky eater, they got to eat something.
• 10:59
  Speaker 4: What are you going to do?
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: Let them be a kid and let them eat that crap.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: They'll grow out of it. Or parents were asked, what's
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: something that you judged other parents for before you became
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: a parent yourself? Planning your day around your kid's nap time.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: I.e.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: Rushing home when they're sleepy. I thought I was going
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: to take a more relaxed approach. It turns out sometimes
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: you just want to stick to the schedule to make
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: things easier for everybody. I get that. I do have
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: a question.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: Like just straight up.
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: Why did you want to do it? Why did you
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: want to have kids? Or were you just naive on
• 11:31
  Speaker 4: how much responsibility.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: It would be?
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: Great question, Menace. I have no idea.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: I think that's a philosophical question that not many people
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: could answer.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: Because I've always wondered that. Like, why do people want
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: to have kids?
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: Well, my wife and I never individually before we were
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: ever together, we were both adults saying, I'm never having kids.
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: And then we got married and we're like, ah, maybe one.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: And we both softened on that. And I don't know
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: what it was. I was married before. I believe it's influence.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: And I was like, nope, absolutely not. And she was
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: big on it. She wanted to have kids. I'm like, nope,
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: absolutely not.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: Most people are hardwired to procreate and have kids.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Right. So were yours planned then? Yeah. See, mine were
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: both oops.
• 12:10
  Speaker 5: It took a while to figure it out, especially like
• 12:14
  Speaker 5: for my wife.
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: It took her a little.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: She'll admit it.
• 12:16
  Speaker 5: Like it took her a while to give up her
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: lifestyle to.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: Figure out kids.
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: I guess you could say in a way mine was
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: an oops.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: Being a stepmom.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: Because I didn't want to fall in love with.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: A guy who had a kid. I did.
• 12:27
  Speaker 3: But I also I know this is going to sound
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: very cliche, but like I think I got a lot
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: of love to give. And I like giving it to some,
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: you know, younger, helpless thing that needs, you know, that
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: that needs that guidance, needs that love. I like doing it.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: My parents raised me on good old-fashioned physical discipline. Belts,
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: extension cords, whatever was closest to my dad.
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: Nice.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: If I was lucky, he let me choose.
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: Oh, my God.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: That's the same style parents need, right? Oh, yeah, for sure.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: Extension cords.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: Switches, wooden spoon, chunk gloves.
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: Wrenches.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: We are back, and we have some more tickets for
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: you this hour. Dominic Fike's going to be at the
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: Wiltern on September the 29th. You can win those tickets
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: between now and 9. We'll tell you when to call
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: in and win. Next hour, tickets to the Pacific Air Show,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: the 10th annual Pacific Air Show, Huntington Beach, October 2nd.
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: Through the 4th.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: It's over the water by the world's best aviators putting
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: on all these cool displays, demos from all four branches
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: of the U.S. military in partnership with the America 250 celebration.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: Not this weekend, but next weekend, October 2nd through the 4th,
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: is the Pacific Air Show in Huntington Beach. Win those
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: tickets coming up in the 9 o'clock hour here on
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: The Woody Show. Phones are open 877-44-WOODY. You can send
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: us a text over to 22987. I have an update
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: for you. Do you remember the Florida woman who claimed
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: the cocaine fell out of her ass and it wasn't hers? Yeah,
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: I remember that.
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I hate when that happens.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Not my butt.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, she made a deal, and the deal is
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: they would drop the drug charges, but she got 18
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: months probation, a $ 700 fine. And then she got credit
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: for the 70 days that she had already spent in jail.
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: Oh, so nothing.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: So, I mean, you have a bunch of cocaine that
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: falls out of your ass during a search.
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: You're all good.
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: And it's 700 bucks and time served.
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: And probation.
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: Which she probably could have been out right away if
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: she would have had any money to... Oh, for bail?
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: To get bailed out.
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: True, true.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: See, there's another thing. We talked about not understanding... Drug stuff, Greg?
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: That process is another one I don't really understand. Completely.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: Bail, bond, don't get it.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bail bondsman, how's that process?
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: I don't get it.
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: My basic understanding, right? So let's say, Greg, you get arrested, right?
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: Right. Bail set at a million dollars.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: You'd be like 10%, I think. So it would be $.
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: 100, 000.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: Now, if you can't come up with $ 100, 000, then you
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: can go to a– people, feel free to correct on
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: the text over to 22987. I could go then or
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: somebody can go to the bail bondsman. Right. And they
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: would put up the hundred grand for you. I don't know.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: But you better show up to your court.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: That's the thing. You are responsible for then showing up
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: for that. Not only repaying the hundred thousand.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: So they'll front the money. Yes. But then they also
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: keep you accountable. Like you're going to be the one
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: showing up to the court. And then if you don't,
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: that's when they send like a bounty hunter. A dog out.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: Like dog the bounty hunter.
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: But there's like a fee or something.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, of course.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: It's like a payday loan. Now here's what I don't get.
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: And this might be the dumbest question ever. Do you
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: get that money back or do you pay it and
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: it's gone?
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: I think you forfeit that money.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: You do?
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Well, okay. So let's say Greg gets arrested, right? Greg
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: gets arrested and he ends up having his day in court. Right.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: He got bailed out. Say he paid $ 100, 000.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: He got bailed out. They have the day in court
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: and he's not guilty. Then do you get the $ 100, 000 back?
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Great question. These are things, thank God, I have no...
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: I know. first-hand experience with.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: If it's uncool, oh, well.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: Like, wait, you don't get bail?
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: Well, this says, no, you do not get your money
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: back from a bail bondsman, even if you are found
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: not guilty.
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: Okay, let's just say you have the money. Not the
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: bail bondsman.
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:23
  Speaker 4: Oh, just bond?
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: I'm saying, like, you know... The bail. Because the bail
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: bondsman pays it to the clerk, right? The county clerk. Yeah.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: I'm assuming. So... Does somebody get the money back, right?
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I don't know.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: If you're found not guilty.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: And why do the 10% thing? If it's a million
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: dollars bail and you have to pay $ 100, 000, why don't
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: they just make it $ 100, 000? Yeah, that's weird. I don't
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: get it.
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: I don't understand why they sentence somebody to life in prison.
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: And make it 20 years.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: But you can get paroled.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: Then that's not life.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: No, you're right. Yes, you will get the bail money
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: back from the court if you are found not guilty.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Okay, and then you would use that to then pay
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: off whatever you owe to... to the bail bondsman.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: That's when you know when you're a good part of town.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: It's crazy that bail bondsmen start seeing those places popping up.
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: You're like, ooh.
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: They have so much money because they're usually like a
• 17:12
  Speaker 4: little hut by the courthouse, you know?
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: Right, right. Well, they're nice and close. It's convenient. Exactly.
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: And much like the life in prison thing, I don't
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: think there should be probation. That's not a punishment. Probation, oh,
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: you're not allowed to get in trouble now.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: You never are.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: How is that a punishment? Well, I mean, if it
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: keeps you out of jail.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: It's like that last chance, right? So you got busted.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: They give you, I don't know, three years of probation.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Keep your nose clean for the next... Of course, you're
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: supposed to.
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah. But then in three years and one day, then
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: you can do whatever you want.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: No, no. But if you don't want to go to
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: jail on your current charge.
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: Like, you're going to stay out of jail. You're on probation.
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: But if you violate that probation, you will go to
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: jail for this.
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: For that. Okay, that makes sense.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: And then you're also in trouble for whatever new thing
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: you did.
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: And here comes the guy in this room, the only
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: person who's ever been to jail. Are you coming in
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: to explain it to us?
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: No, I was just going to say.
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, I thought you were just going to say, okay.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: I was going to say, Greg, you know, like, it
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: worked for me. Probation was plenty for me to learn. Yeah, dude.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: Here's how I look at it. We're all on probation. Technically, yeah.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: You're not allowed to.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: Commit any crimes.
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: No, you're not. But if, like, say you broke a,
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: you know, whatever. You committed a crime.
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: Right? You still could get probation. But if you're on
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: probation and you commit a crime, you're in jail.
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: For longer.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you go to jail for whatever you already did.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: And now you're also in trouble for whatever you did that,
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 18:40
  Speaker 4: It's compounded.
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: Ruined your probation. Yeah.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Greg. I just don't find it to be a punishment.
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, you move differently. That's for sure. When you're
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: on probation. That's for sure.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: Oh, I bet.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: How long was your probation? Three years. Is it one
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: of those you had to like check in with somebody? Nope.
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: Because, yeah. I got everything reduced, so. Yeah. I thought
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: you had to check in with your parole officer.
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: That's a different level. That's different?
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: See, I don't know. Parole and probation are different. Yeah.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: Such a loser.
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: God. You're such a square.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: Don't do such a square.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: Jeff did white collar crime, not. Yes. Yeah.
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: Parole is like ankle monitor stuff, right?
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: You could be on probation with ankle monitors, too.
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: You could be waiting to go to court with ankle monitor.
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 19:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, my friend, she had to go to Tent City.
• 19:31
  Speaker 4: She had an ankle monitor. She was allowed to leave,
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: you know, Tent City and Arizona, the jail and the desert.
• 19:37
  Speaker 4: She was allowed to leave, but she had an ankle
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: monitor on to go to work and then come back.
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: How was that in jail?
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, gotta make that money.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. I worked.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: Is it a work release? Really? Like a work release program? Uh, well, no,
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: it's yeah.
• 19:51
  Speaker 4: Just like you had to go to jail during the day.
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: She would leave for like four hours, five hours a
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: day and then go back to jail.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: But like, that's what it's called, right?
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: The one, the guy that I worked with, it was
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: called the honor farm. He lived at the honor farm.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: And he could go to work.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: And if you had to stay at work one minute over,
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: you had to call and report and say where you're
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: going to be. Yeah. And then after work, go right
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: back to work.
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, one year we went on a vacation to
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: this island called Rorotonga. And I really wanted to go
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: to the jail just to see what it was like.
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: And we went on a weekday and it was empty.
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: We're like, where is everybody? And the jail, the correctional
• 20:30
  Speaker 3: officer said, oh, everyone went home for lunch.
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: Some of the text, the 10 percent is a down
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: payment for the total amount of bail. The bail company
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: then pays the remainder. You never get that 10%. They
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: get to keep that as their fee.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
• 20:47
  Speaker 5: You're basically taking a loan out with the bondsman. Now,
• 20:50
  Speaker 5: let's say Woody had 100 grand in cash as an example.
• 20:54
  Speaker 5: He could put that down. And as long as I
• 20:56
  Speaker 5: went to all my court appointments, Woody would get his
• 20:58
  Speaker 5: money back. But because it's cash, Woody's money is not
• 21:01
  Speaker 5: borrowed from the bondsman.
• 21:02
  Speaker 3: And you can put up your house or something. Somebody
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: called me. I know this secondhand because I was called
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: by a bail bondsman. to put up money for somebody,
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: and I said, no, thank you, and hung up the phone.
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think I'd bail anybody out.
• 21:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: Depending on how long.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: It depends who it is.
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: And what was the circumstance? Is it something that they
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: actually did, or are they now caught up in something,
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: wrong place, wrong time? Yeah.
• 21:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah, there's levels to it. I mean, if you know
• 21:28
  Speaker 5: they're a tweaker, and they're in trouble for like the
• 21:30
  Speaker 5: fifth time.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: You're good. Hell no. Lose my number. But, you know,
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: people make stupid decisions, and they do whatever. And depending
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: on just how close you are to this person, like,
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: I'm willing to give somebody one, you know? No matter
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: how stupid it is. We've said that before.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: The first one.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: No pun intended, but, like, one bailout, you know, if
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: you can swing it. Depends on also what it is. Like,
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: what are we really talking about here? Depending on what
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: the crime was or what you're being accused of, don't
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: want to touch that at all. Don't want to be involved,
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: you know? But what if your kid did the.
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: Dumbest thing, like, ever? Like, really bad and, like, definitely
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: their fault.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: Like this look-smacking kid? Yeah.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: No. No way.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: Daddy, please! Not touching Daddy nothing.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: Jeff, are you allowed to drink when you're on probation?
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: I think it depends on the.
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for the most part.
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: Some of the monitors, they can detect.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, wasn't like Tracy Morgan's when he had his? It
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: was like detecting.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: So you talk about a punishment. Everything's different. There's so
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: many levels to all of it. So wait, what's the
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: difference between parole and probation?
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: Well, parole is when you get out of prison, right?
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's a more serious crime thing. But
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: like parole, you got to see a parole officer. But
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: is that just the same thing as probation?
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: Like, you can't get in trouble.
• 22:56
  Speaker 3: Probation is given by a judge instead of jail time.
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: Parole is an early release after prison time.
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: Oh, there you go.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Okay. And going back to that. I never did prison time. Yeah,
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: so you're here.
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: Just counting, right?
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: No, not even.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Not even counting? You got taken to count. Quick ins
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: and outs, yes.
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: You got processed and released.
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: Ye olde revolving door.
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: It's basically like vacation.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: Procidicism. Yes. Horse vacation. Door's going to swing wide. 877-44-WOODY. What, Menace?
• 23:23
  Speaker 4: I was just going to say, my friend with the
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: ankle monitor, she bedazzled it, so it was super cute.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's so cute.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: It's so cute.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: How long has Julianne had.
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: It?
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: Never Julianne.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: 877-44-WOODY.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Text us over to 22987. More Woody shows next.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: Hang on.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: Today, I hope you die painfully.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: Painfully.
• 23:43
  Speaker 4: Painfully.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: Painfully.
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: Hope you die.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: More Woody shows.