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King Arthur: The Legend of a Guy · Movie Meltdown

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: In under a minute, you will be transported to a
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: bizarre and fantastic new age.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Malcolm McDowell.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: You're listening to Movie Meltdown.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: So just keep listening. Movie Meltdown.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: The following feature has been rated R by the Motion
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: and parental discretion is advised. It's showtime, folks.
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: Enjoy the show.
• 0:56
  Speaker 5: Our nuclear reactor, pumping out one million kilowatts of power.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: What's up and welcome to Movie Meltdown. I'm Brian.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, I'm Gina.
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  Speaker 5: And I'm Paul.
• 1:30
  Speaker 6: How do you know my name?
• 1:35
  Speaker 7: It's questionable sometimes.
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: And we are coming to you live from... Okay, now
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: this place does actually have a studio. Does your studio
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: not have a name?
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: It's Blue Jay Way.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: There you go.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: Straight from Blue Jay Way.
• 2:03
  Speaker 8: Because we got all these Blue Jays that are loud
• 2:05
  Speaker 8: and obnoxious and awesome.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: And they fight the hawks.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: This is like Birdemic all over. I know. So, coming
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: to you live via digital recording from Blue Jay Way.
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: We're back. You guys.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: can't stay away. You love it so much.
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  Speaker 8: Who, us?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, obviously.
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  Speaker 2: I know.
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  Speaker 8: I have too much fun.
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  Speaker 2: This is too much fun.
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  Speaker 8: Good times, good times.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: So, before we throw ourselves into this week's movie, have
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: you seen anything else lately? Have you watched any films
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: or anything interesting, I suppose? Fargo.
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  Speaker 3: The series.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: I was going to say, film or series? And then
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: which season are you well we just started season.
• 2:49
  Speaker 8: Three we totally binge watched we couldn't they were so
• 2:52
  Speaker 8: good i loved have you seen.
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  Speaker 2: It this is there's just too many things i can't
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  Speaker 2: oh god brian i can't.
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  Speaker 3: Keep up it's too many things it's super good.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah like the first season is awesome and i like
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: the whole cast involved in all seasons and i'm just
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: like damn it stop making so many shows.
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  Speaker 8: And then the second season is phenomenal.
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  Speaker 3: It's like they made a 20-hour movie.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Well, that's what all of these have become now. The
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: ones that are really well made, I'm just like, it
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  Speaker 2: really is just finding a much bigger way to tell
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  Speaker 2: a story. So if you can do it good, it's
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: a difference from some of the crappy network shows that
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: for years have had thousands of hours to waste on storytelling.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: Like Two Broke Girls?
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  Speaker 1: Yeah.
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  Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah.
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  Speaker 2: You know, I see a lot of that. This is
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: one of those things. It's like, it's almost to keep
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: my brain in check. Like, because they're on all the time.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: So I will kind of semi-regularly end up, and I
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: don't seek it out. It just comes on, and I'm
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: usually doing something else, probably editing the show. And I've
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: got it muted, and I'll be like, ah, damn it,
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: there it is again. And like, I'll just leave it
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: on and kind of check in enough to go, yeah,
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: this is really bad. Yeah, this is just... I really,
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: I feel bad for Kat Dennings. I think she's like
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: actually got talent and wasted. It's just the worst writing ever. Yeah.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: And I do the same thing with maybe the worst
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: show ever before that. The one that it took its
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: place was Two and a Half Men, which is on
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: every night. And I keep like flogging myself. It's just
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: self punishment every night as I'm just like, no, this is,
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  Speaker 2: Not only bad writing, but just obnoxious. It's just not
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  Speaker 2: really fun for anyone.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: Well, it's filling some demographic hole. It was on.
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  Speaker 8: For a long time.
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  Speaker 2: It was terrible. It was the number one show.
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  Speaker 8: Yeah, my brother loved it, and I was like, this
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  Speaker 8: is dumb. It's bad. But to the same note, Big
• 4:51
  Speaker 8: Bang Theory. On all the time. Can't stand it. And
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  Speaker 8: I know it's supposed to be funny, and I'm not
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  Speaker 8: a dumb person.
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  Speaker 2: I'm not like, I don't get the jokes.
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  Speaker 8: But I just don't get the jokes.
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  Speaker 2: From day one, I found it patronizing to people who
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  Speaker 2: are geeks. Because it's... Well, I mean, just as a show,
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  Speaker 2: it's written badly. And I think I've bitched about this
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  Speaker 2: on the show before. But I'm like, it's just structured badly.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: Let me put it this way. You have jobs. You
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  Speaker 2: go to these jobs. Do you then leave the jobs
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  Speaker 2: and come home and hang out with the exact same
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: people that were at your jobs with you? Right.
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  Speaker 3: That's bullshit.
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  Speaker 2: Like, that is not how life works. I know it's
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: not life. It's a TV show. But there's some allowances
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: you make. But, like, other sitcoms have been just fine.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: You know, like, Cheers was on for years. Those guys
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: didn't work together and then go home together.
• 5:43
  Speaker 8: Like go to the bar together and then go home. Yeah.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: They didn't all follow Norm home at the end of
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  Speaker 2: the night and go to his job to paint office
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: buildings in the middle of the day. Like everybody has
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: a real life and they go off to them and
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: have their separate existences. And like, They didn't figure out
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: the most basic form of interactions with humans. It's like, no,
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: everybody sits together all day long, all the damn time.
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  Speaker 8: And then goes home and does the same thing.
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  Speaker 2: And again, I think not so much that they're just
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: beating you over the head with geek references, which now
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: they really do, but it's also kind of patronizing to
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  Speaker 2: not just geeks, but also the nerdy science guys. I'm like,
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: you know... Probably a lot of guys that work in
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  Speaker 2: the science industry that could give a rat's ass about
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: comic books.
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  Speaker 5: Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: And go into conventions and, like, the kind of stuff
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: that I actually do pay attention to. Like, I am
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  Speaker 2: also not a science guy. So, like, that's not synonymous.
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  Speaker 2: That's not the same thing. And only, like, mainstream doofuses
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  Speaker 2: who really do not know how to differentiate.
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  Speaker 8: Think it's the same thing.
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  Speaker 2: Oh, you're a nerd. This is what you do.
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  Speaker 8: No.
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  Speaker 9: Know you must be a scientist you don't know anything
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  Speaker 9: about these kind of people that you're now basing an
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  Speaker 9: entire show around like that's the part that always rubbed
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  Speaker 9: me the wrong way now but then it's it's.
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  Speaker 8: The same it's written by the same guy right who
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  Speaker 8: who did two and a half men i believe so
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  Speaker 8: like he's just totally out of touch with like what
• 7:09
  Speaker 8: it must be like to be a human pretty much
• 7:11
  Speaker 8: so i think the alien overlords are finally winning it's
• 7:14
  Speaker 8: like this must be what humans do Poor things.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: That's what I do.
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  Speaker 2: I think their geek references have gotten better. I think
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: they took a lot of heat that first season or two,
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  Speaker 2: and they brought in people to write that actually at
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: least knew the right references to make, but it's still
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: a bullshit way to make it.
• 7:28
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I hate that show.
• 7:30
  Speaker 10: That's my call.
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  Speaker 3: I don't like it.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: And it's another one. I like a lot of that cast.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: Or at least like, I like David and I still
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: call him David. He'll be David. He'll always be David.
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  Speaker 2: Even now that he's one of the highest paid actors
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  Speaker 2: in the world and he's still David. Oh yeah. Those
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: guys are the only people on television making money right now.
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  Speaker 8: You know, and what else bugs me too is the
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  Speaker 8: poor Indian kid, right? Like, could you be a more.
• 7:53
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: Again, that's kind of insulting. Racial, insulting. Especially because in
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  Speaker 2: the real world, he doesn't talk like that.
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  Speaker 1: No.
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  Speaker 2: But he also kind of seems like a douche. So like.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: He seems like a douche. Again, they're quote unquote Jewish
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: guy that we have to cram in here.
• 8:07
  Speaker 8: Yeah, the crammed in douche guy.
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  Speaker 2: In the real world, he seems kind of douchey. I'm like,
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: I don't know. And like in the show, Sheldon's a douche.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Like in the real world, that guy actually seems very cool.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: But I'm like, why can't you play yourself in the show?
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: Because in the show, you're obnoxious. That's the fictional part
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  Speaker 2: of it. In the real world, you wouldn't have friends.
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  Speaker 8: So here's the sad thing. I can't think of any
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  Speaker 8: other new network show that I've actually, oh, yeah, wait, Empire.
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  Speaker 2: I love it.
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  Speaker 8: Paul hates that.
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  Speaker 2: I love it. It's so trashy. As long as you
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: don't steer into, no, okay, wait, that's not true. I
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: was going to say all I do is watch the CW,
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: which is true. Those are the only shows I pay
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: any attention to. But there's one exception. Superstore is really good.
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: I've heard that it's really good.
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  Speaker 8: I've heard that. And then I've heard that the new
• 8:50
  Speaker 8: Tina Fey produced News 1. See, I mean, I know
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  Speaker 8: it just doesn't launch like regular television.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: It looked possibly, but yeah, the only thing network-wise I
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: can think of that I kind of try to remind,
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: oh yeah, that's on tonight. Like, it's rare that I
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: do that with most shows other than the handful of
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: CW shows. But like, yeah, the Superstore. I'll have to
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: check that out. Surprisingly well-written. And again, somebody who gets
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: the world that they're making fun of. If you worked
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: a retail job, oh my god, it's frighteningly... I mean, granted,
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: they get away with murder comparatively. Some of the stuff
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: they do sometimes, I'm like, okay, you've dialed it up
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: to 11, but they will just do cutaway shots of
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: ridiculous things going on in the store. They have nothing
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: to do. It's just like a customer wandering off by
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: themselves or they'll do a cutaway. It'll be like somebody
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: trying something on in the middle of the section. And
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: I'm just like, no, that shit's happening. You go to
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: any bad retail store right now and that is going on.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: I think I've done that. Yeah, you're one of those people.
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  Speaker 2: I'm no shame.
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  Speaker 8: I've changed clothes on a dock in Italy.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: We've noticed. So yeah, that's the only network show I
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: can think of to recommend.
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  Speaker 8: Yeah it's pretty tragic that the best things being made
• 10:03
  Speaker 8: right now which movies included are things that are on
• 10:08
  Speaker 8: like Amazon and Netflix and I mean well.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: That's that's something I've brought up on the show and
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: I'll see what your take on it is how much
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: are we blurring the lines now when i mean between
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: what and what because well i mean even if we
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: start with the most basic level of like is there
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: a difference between you making a movie that's a straight
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: to and financed now by netflix versus doing a super
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: indie limited release run that never really makes it to
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: any theaters that anybody knows to and then it bounces
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: to netflix anyway is there a difference like i mean
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: is that because i don't know like for like hardcore
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: old school filmmakers maybe there is like maybe they feel
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: like now that's just streaming tv essentially but like they
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: are making movies now too so i'm like is there
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: are we dividing those up or is that all becoming
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: one big area and if that's becoming one big area
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: like again how far off is it before the series
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: are also just kind of a longer running time like
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: i mean the fact that we have all these weird
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: especially documentaries that are massively long and And they're still theatrical.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: Like there's that weird Grateful Dead one that's like four
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: or five hours long. The OJ one was eight hours long.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: I mean, the fact that we have these now like
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: epic quote unquote still movies. And yet we also have,
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: you know, like 12, 13 hour series in quotes now.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: what's what's the deal like what's the dividing line now
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: if you're not watching it in a different way it
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: used to be different when it was network television you
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: broke it up into you know 22 minutes and you
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: know 46 minutes and like you had to tell your
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: story and you broke it up and you sat there
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: a week apart waiting for the next chapter when you
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: binge watch them all and they're all made for one
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: streaming service anyway like what we're we're creating a new
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: breed of thing yeah So I don't know. It's a
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: new paradigm. It kind of, yeah. It's a whole new
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: game now. I love it. I like the options. I'm
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: just like, again, because I'm a geek and I try
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: to categorize and put things in their appropriate boxes and
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: things don't fit in their boxes anymore. It's disturbing.
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  Speaker 8: Well, and it is weird because when you think about
• 12:22
  Speaker 8: winning an Oscar, right, for your film, well, there's television...
• 12:28
  Speaker 8: movies or whatever that are just as deserving of, and probably.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: More so than, but Oscar has their weird rules and
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: they will not let that happen. And I really do
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: not think that's going to change. Like all the other
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: stuff is becoming one big, even to the point of,
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: and granted, this is a step down for most people,
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: but I used to actually like love what they were
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: doing on the MTV movie awards. And the fact that
• 12:52
  Speaker 2: this year, I think it was gone for a while,
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: but when they brought it back this year, now it's
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: the MTV film and TV awards. Which is still set
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: up the same way, but I guess TV is such
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: a thing now. Yeah.
• 13:04
  Speaker 8: You can't ignore it.
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: And they're not going to do... Again, I wish they
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: kind of kept it the way it was in a way,
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: but I guess, once again, because it's all getting lumped
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: into one big area now, because everything's being made for
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Amazon or Hulu or YouTube Red, and because it's one
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: big thing now, I guess you can't even really separate into...
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: Other than Oscar, which we'll always be like, screw you guys,
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: we're better than everybody.
• 13:28
  Speaker 8: We're better than everybody else. But you know, I mean,
• 13:30
  Speaker 8: everybody's got like, well, I mean, most people have large
• 13:33
  Speaker 8: enough TVs that you can watch a movie and it's
• 13:35
  Speaker 8: still good. And going to a theater is kind of
• 13:37
  Speaker 8: a pain in the ass.
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: I mean, I still love that experience. But at the
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: same time, it is a little more to deal with.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: You do have other issues going on. I'm also, my
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: brain is dysfunctional and I'm slightly narcoleptic. So at this point,
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: I'm mostly just paid to take a nap, which I
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: don't like either. Where at least if I'm watching it
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: at home, I can pause it. You're at home. You
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: can pause it. You can start over. I don't expect
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: everyone else in the theater to be like, guys, guys,
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: getting a little sleepy? We're going to take a 20-minute break, okay?
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: You guys go get some popcorn.
• 14:08
  Speaker 8: And the same thing that makes it awesome is the
• 14:10
  Speaker 8: same thing that makes it awful. You have to take
• 14:12
  Speaker 8: time to go do it. And you may be like,
• 14:15
  Speaker 8: I really want to see it. But I don't want
• 14:16
  Speaker 8: to see it right now.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: Which, I mean, in a way is good because it
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: makes you focus, too. Like, you aren't playing on your
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: phone or the person behind you will pummel you and should, rightfully, really. But, like,
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: you're not doing nine other things. You're not Pinteresting in
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: the middle of the movie you're supposed to be watching.
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: You know what I think is really interesting.
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: Though, is the... You're not Pinteresting. That was a reference
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: for you.
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: Fathom Entertainment or whatever.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah. You know, and.
• 14:45
  Speaker 3: Going to the movies was sort of a dying event.
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: It still kind of is, but still is.
• 14:50
  Speaker 11: Well, but that company is bringing live events to the
• 14:54
  Speaker 11: movie theater and all.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: The, you know, it's bringing people in.
• 14:56
  Speaker 8: But it's bringing stuff that's also dying, like the ballet
• 14:59
  Speaker 8: and German opera.
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: The German opera, yeah.
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: But, you know... But in a way, it's nice for
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: those other mediums, too, because it's like, how many people
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: get a chance to go to the ballet?
• 15:13
  Speaker 8: Especially if they can't afford it.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, no, no. It's cool. And you've got a whole.
• 15:20
  Speaker 11: Collection of demographics that weren't involved in going to the movies.
• 15:23
  Speaker 8: Well that's fine like why don't they do that with
• 15:26
  Speaker 8: like sporting events then like what and this is like
• 15:28
  Speaker 8: a totally nerdy thing that i'm going to talk about.
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: Here sporting events don't need any.
• 15:32
  Speaker 8: Help no no no nobody wait nobody shows throwing.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: Their popcorn down fights breaking out constantly.
• 15:40
  Speaker 8: Hang on nobody shows stadium jumping anymore like our three-day
• 15:43
  Speaker 8: event horse stuff Right? I know that sounds totally ridiculous,
• 15:47
  Speaker 8: but if they're going to do these things that nobody
• 15:49
  Speaker 8: really cares about anymore, then why don't they include sporting
• 15:52
  Speaker 8: events that nobody cares about?
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: Gladiator.
• 15:55
  Speaker 8: Like horse stuff.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Isn't that just streaming on your TV at home, though? No,
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: I can't.
• 16:00
  Speaker 8: Well, I don't have cable.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: You need to get cable, I guess, because somewhere you
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: can watch a 24-hour feed of the Westminster Dog Show
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: and like... You don't have to go to the theater
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: to see that. You can just watch it all day long.
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: But they could. You could make it a thing. I mean,
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: it's got a following at this point. You probably could
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: release it theatrically.
• 16:16
  Speaker 11: What is the other lost demographic that could benefit from
• 16:19
  Speaker 11: a live event at a movie theater?
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: Children's plays. Children's plays? You're like third grade nephews play.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: You're like, I don't have time to go. Just on Thursday,
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: rerun it again. I'll watch it then. Or, well, no,
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: I think the idea is that you make it live.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: So everyone in the world can experience. So everyone in
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: the world can experience your child.
• 16:42
  Speaker 8: The radio reader.
• 16:44
  Speaker 6: God.
• 16:45
  Speaker 8: The old dude.
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: I used to love that.
• 16:48
  Speaker 8: They just had him on there like reading and turning
• 16:50
  Speaker 8: a page. That would be enough.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: And so Gladys said, I'd be happy to get the
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: fruit salad.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Well, we do have. I mean, that's something that's confused
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: me since this sort of thing took off. And I'm
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: talking about just like radio and talking. The fact that
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: there are televised version of idiots sitting in front of microphones.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: I'm like, the fact that we do it and people
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: listen to it is one thing. I listen to a
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: lot of shows like that. But when I... I mean,
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: they started doing it with the Howard Stern Show. But
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: now there's tons of them on it. Like 3 o'clock
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: in the morning, there's like those idiots in Atlanta that
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: are always doing it. Sports programming. A lot of sports ones, yeah.
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: But like the ones that's on, like, I keep seeing
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: that when I'm just like, why am I watching you
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: idiots talk in a room by yourselves? Like, it's one
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: thing if you're listening, but the fact that people tune
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: in to see you Sit.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: In a room, not do anything. Yeah, the video podcast.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: You really need that, yeah.
• 17:47
  Speaker 11: Ladies and gentlemen, you don't realize the service that we're
• 17:51
  Speaker 11: doing for you by not providing video.
• 17:54
  Speaker 8: I don't think I've brushed my hair in a week.
• 17:56
  Speaker 7: She's not kidding.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: It's disturbing. This is truly, it's theater of the mind.
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: So you can picture the whole crazy thing. And there's
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: a squirrel living in it right now. I got it
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: from outside.
• 18:09
  Speaker 8: We were digging holes together.
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah. We've got to have a place for McCrash later.
• 18:14
  Speaker 8: That's right.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: It's all come together now. So, we've solved all the
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: media problems.
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: Of the future.
• 18:22
  Speaker 7: Yep.
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: We figured it out.
• 18:23
  Speaker 8: More German opera at the movies.
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: That's what it needs. And out of touch writers that
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: don't understand the group they're sadly talking down to.
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: Jawohl, Herr Fraulein.
• 18:37
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: Or German opera.
• 18:42
  Speaker 4: Aloha.
• 18:46
  Speaker 10: All right.
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: With that, I think we should take a break, and
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: then we'll get into this week's movie.
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: We're delighted to have you with us and we extend
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: a cordial welcome to you. We've lined up the top
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: stars from Hollywood and from all over the world to
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: entertain you on our giant screen with the new, colorful
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: motion pictures you've been hearing about and reading about. To
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: add to your enjoyment, we're all wound up to bowl
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: you over at intermission time with live wire service at
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: our snack bar, where you'll find a tempting variety of
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: favorite foods and beverages. Now, for the first time on
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: the screen, Hercules Unchained. See the mammoth war of chariots.
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: See the unchained Hercules win the battle of giants. See
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: in color. Hercules Unchained.
• 19:59
  Speaker 8: You think movie theaters will ever just totally die? Like,
• 20:01
  Speaker 8: will that just be a thing that nobody does anymore?
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: Not in any near future because I feel like it
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: is still too big an industry. And I think it
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: is still geared towards, I think we've seen the biggest
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: jump is the fact that everything is opening weekend. The
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: fact that there is no longevity to film. It is,
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: you have your maybe two week window. If you're the
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: like blockbuster of the year, you got three weeks. After that,
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: like something new comes along, knocks you out. You're on
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: Blu-ray in a month. So it's like there's still a
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: little window for theater that like is centered around that.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: And there's weird adjustments that are coming in that like
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: you can stream it at home, which they tried to
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: do and it didn't really work. And it didn't really work.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: It didn't take off. Like they were really pushing for it,
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: but it was so pricey that nobody wanted to do it.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: So I guess everybody fell back to, all right, I
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: really want to see this. I guess I go see
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: it in theater. because I don't want to be left behind.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: So I think that element won't go away because everybody's still,
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: I don't want to be out of the conversation. The
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: water cooler talk is going to be about Guardians 2.
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: I got to go see it. So like, I feel
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: like there is still going to be that little tiny
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: window that's going to stay around at least until, you know,
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: the apocalypse kicks in. By then we're all screwed. But
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: between now and then, I think that, I think there's
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: a level of it that'll be okay. It's just never
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: going to be the, Massive industry it used to be.
• 21:34
  Speaker 8: And it is more just like things are now vehicles
• 21:39
  Speaker 8: for the items that are attached to it.
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: It's all just tentpole releases.
• 21:44
  Speaker 8: But then you got like Guardians, which is actually good.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: It is. Yeah, it's surprisingly good.
• 21:48
  Speaker 8: And it's charming.
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: You can't sell a toy with it.
• 21:54
  Speaker 8: You're not doing it right.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: You can't pick up a Doritos bag that has your
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: character on it.
• 22:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: Which is what we need to get going. We need
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: to get our characters for these movies that we pitched
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: that other episode. We need to get them on bags
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: of Doritos. Start raking in that kind of Dorito money.
• 22:13
  Speaker 8: We could just make like fictional ones for the hell
• 22:15
  Speaker 8: of it.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: You just start making your own bags of Doritos. You're
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: at home like hand painting each bag of Doritos. With
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: our like Janet Snakehole the Dorito.
• 22:26
  Speaker 8: Janet Snakehole.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Are you going to get sued for that? Because I
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: don't know if that's your character. You better come up
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: with your own.
• 22:32
  Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, that's true. Well, we got plenty. I mean,
• 22:35
  Speaker 8: you know, just think about all.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: We certainly did based on that one.
• 22:38
  Speaker 8: We have to revisit that. I'm sure I have plenty
• 22:39
  Speaker 8: more in my head. But yeah, we should do like
• 22:42
  Speaker 8: a fictitious Dorito release.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: We should do like the face-off werewolves in Waterworld, which
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: was maybe my favorite pitch. So you come up with
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: a tie-in Dorito bag that features that where we'll face off.
• 22:54
  Speaker 8: Or a Taco Bell product, as we were talking about earlier.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: Earlier we were discussing the windows of Taco Bell. So
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: if we can get sponsored by them, we can have
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: one of those little pull-off tab games or something. Or
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: that's what Donald's most of the time. But even then,
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: any of these sponsorships where we get some sort of
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: game where you can win a prize. Scratch-offs. Scratch-offs. Get
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: picked up by the lottery.
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: There we go.
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: I think we're on to something. Until then, feel free
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: to join the Patreon page. Until that kicks in, we're
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: still looking for you guys to keep us alive. So
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: this is a great episode, right? Well, if you'd like
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: to keep more awesome discussions like this one coming your way,
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: you need to join the club over on the Movie
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: Meltdown Patreon page. If you can chip in just a
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: couple of bucks, you can keep the show going. With
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: your contributions, we can continue to keep producing great episodes,
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: keep organizing these fun conversations about film, and keep booking
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: amazing guests. So just go to patreon.com slash movie meltdown
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: or go to movie meltdown.com and the link is right
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: there at the top of the page and you can
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: help keep the show going. Plus you get exclusive episodes
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: every month just for club members. So go to our
• 24:11
  Speaker 2: Patreon page, join the Meltdown Club, become a Melketeer, get
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: cool stuff, and keep the Meltdown rolling. Damn the man.
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: Save the meltdown.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Your continued patronage is very, very welcome.
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Richard Keel, Jaws from the James Bond movies,
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: and you're listening to Movie Meltdown.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: Now it's showtime, folks. And you can be sure it's
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: the best show in town.
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: Get more out of life. Go out to a movie.
• 25:04
  Speaker 5: Listen to me.
• 25:24
  Speaker 7: I need you to do as I tell you.
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: I need to get you and the boy away from here.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Protect the king!
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: Did you see everything you needed to see?
• 25:48
  Speaker 10: I saw enough.
• 25:53
  Speaker 7: Why is the water dropped?
• 25:56
  Speaker 5: Why does the sword reveal itself now?
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: As your power.
• 26:02
  Speaker 8: Increases, so do the forces that will oppose you.
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: The born king will come. It is inevitable.
• 26:16
  Speaker 7: He felt it.
• 26:22
  Speaker 5: I've never had any power or any desire to achieve it.
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: That's what all the fuss is about.
• 26:32
  Speaker 6: Don't worry.
• 26:32
  Speaker 7: You'll soon understand what all the fuss is about.
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: Are you scared? I think I can manage. You should
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: be scared.
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: Whatever it takes to hunt him down.
• 26:49
  Speaker 10: If I go down, you follow him.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: If he goes down, you follow me.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: You want him to think big?
• 26:54
  Speaker 10: I'll give you something big to think about.
• 27:05
  Speaker 4: You wanted a prophecy. This is your proxy.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: The man who pulled Thor from stone.
• 27:13
  Speaker 8: Behold, your born king.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: So, we left the house and went to the theater,
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: which doesn't always happen, as previously discussed. Going out to
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: the theater, it's a pain in the ass, especially when
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: you're the only ones there. We'll get back to that later.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: This week's Out on the Town feature is King Arthur, colon,
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: Legend of the Sword. The year is 2017. The director
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: is our lovely guy, Richie. And the plot, according to IMDb,
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: there's the key phrase, Robbed of his birthright, Arthur comes
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: up the hard way in the back alleys of the city.
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: But once he pulls the sword from the stone, he
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: is forced to acknowledge his true legacy, whether he likes
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: it or not. Duh, what? Spoiler alert, we're going to
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: ruin this movie, so go see it, or most of
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: you didn't, so it would seem so.
• 28:24
  Speaker 8: Or just wait until it's on cable.
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: We'll spoil it for you now. Yeah, just don't see
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: it and we'll tell you all about it. We'll ruin
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: it for you.
• 28:31
  Speaker 8: And then you can catch it like at 3 in
• 28:33
  Speaker 8: the morning when you can't sleep and be like, whoa,
• 28:35
  Speaker 8: this is true.
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: So before we get into the movie itself, I will
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: say when I got there, and this was the opening Saturday.
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: There was not a lot of people. Now, granted, it
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: wasn't prime time. I went early because, again, I'm trying
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: to stay awake during movies in general. And this one
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: probably needed a little help.
• 28:52
  Speaker 8: What time did you go and how many people were there?
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: Very early. Like the first run of the day. And
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: I was trying to kind of do a head count
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: while I was there. It was like probably I'd say
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: 12 or less. It might have been more in the
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: area of like 10, 9. This is opening weekend, guys.
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: So we went on Friday night.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: You were prime time.
• 29:17
  Speaker 3: At 7?
• 29:18
  Speaker 8: At 7... Was it 7?
• 29:24
  Speaker 7: 7.05.
• 29:24
  Speaker 11: It was at 7.05, and there were 10 people, including us,
• 29:28
  Speaker 11: in the theater.
• 29:30
  Speaker 8: No one under the age of 40, I'm sure.
• 29:34
  Speaker 11: But it worked out well for us because the kids
• 29:38
  Speaker 11: didn't love it.
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: Damn.
• 29:39
  Speaker 11: Because the kids were watching Guardians of the Galaxy.
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: Good choice. And we were with the old people. The
• 29:46
  Speaker 2: old people. They were all old people.
• 29:49
  Speaker 3: And there was one guy that found every scene funny.
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: Some of those old people might be us. Anyway, so, yeah,
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: as I brought the, again, I was just bringing up
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: the plot, and I was like, the other, the first
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: thing that came up before I got to the plot
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: was the fact that this is, according to Google, the
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: first flop of the year. I was like, oh. Oh,
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: we have picked a winner this week. Here's the thing
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: that once I clicked on that. According to Variety, the
• 30:20
  Speaker 2: $ 175 million budgeted project, not including marketing costs, which is
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: usually more than that, is facing a disastrous $ 18 million debut,
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: despite Warner Brothers remaining hopeful that the film can exceed
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: the $ 20 million mark. Hopeful they can get to $ 20 million.
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: It cost $ 175 million. Not including promotion, which is usually about,
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: I mean, on those big movies, it really is more
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: than the budget sometimes.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: What?
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: To put your King Arthur on a bag of Doritos. So,
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: what the hell? What happened?
• 30:55
  Speaker 8: What happened to Guy Ritchie?
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: No, I mean, I feel like it's kind of right there. Like,
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: it doesn't really surprise me, actually. God, do you.
• 31:04
  Speaker 8: Not like Guy Ritchie? And I'll tell you the one
• 31:06
  Speaker 8: thing that the movie did right.
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: All right, let's get into it.
• 31:08
  Speaker 8: The entire little montage of him growing up was probably
• 31:12
  Speaker 8: the best part of that film.
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: And the most Guy Ritchie-y part of it I had
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: ever seen. I was just like.
• 31:18
  Speaker 8: It was totally... Is.
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: This King Arthur in Snatch?
• 31:21
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I know, but that kind of made it okay.
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: Because it was.
• 31:24
  Speaker 8: Because that's what I wanted it to be. And I
• 31:26
  Speaker 8: wanted it to have that same.
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: Maybe, again, I'm like, I guess if you're going to
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: do it, because it definitely doesn't go the old school
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: Excalibur route. No. You know what?
• 31:39
  Speaker 8: And Eric Bana was great. He was phenomenal. He could
• 31:42
  Speaker 8: have been an Excalibur, right?
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: He's a good actor. He plays it pretty straight.
• 31:46
  Speaker 8: He plays it straight. He's a good actor. I pretty
• 31:48
  Speaker 8: much like anything he's in. There's just something about him
• 31:50
  Speaker 8: that's earnest and good. And everything else was like somebody...
• 31:57
  Speaker 8: decided they wanted to make a Guy Ritchie version of
• 32:01
  Speaker 8: that legend, and yet it wasn't Guy Ritchie. But you
• 32:04
  Speaker 8: know what I mean? It was like a dime store
• 32:06
  Speaker 8: knockoff of a Guy Ritchie film.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: Like his own thing.
• 32:10
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 32:10
  Speaker 11: So this is my immediate impression upon exiting the film.
• 32:16
  Speaker 11: And Gina and I had discussed this previously, so I
• 32:20
  Speaker 11: don't know.
• 32:20
  Speaker 3: But anyway, the problem was that it could have worked.
• 32:27
  Speaker 11: As a Guy Ritchie film like Snatch or Sherlock Holmes
• 32:31
  Speaker 11: or whatever.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: But the story was far too big.
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: Too big.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: Too serious. He has no handle on it.
• 32:37
  Speaker 11: And yet every five seconds there was some little quick
• 32:41
  Speaker 11: quip that was intended to make it funny. And you
• 32:45
  Speaker 11: can't make that story funny. There's a bad guy.
• 32:50
  Speaker 8: Yeah, and the bad guy was so campy. I mean,
• 32:52
  Speaker 8: it was like.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: We're talking about an ancient... Hugely big story.
• 33:01
  Speaker 11: And here we're trying to cram all this crap into
• 33:07
  Speaker 11: the first half hour.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: I feel like it's also like they didn't really... Decide
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: a hundred percent what they want to do. Once again,
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: I think it's almost like, like, did he really want
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: to make King Arthur or was it one of those? Like,
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: cause I'm like, you could have just made a medieval
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: tale of some sort about this guy. And like, because
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: the very King Arthur re things are, pretty minimal i'm
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: like there's like what a half second shot of the
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: lady in the lake which is like a huge part
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: of the mythology of it and it's like i love
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: barely mentioned yeah and then like even the the sword
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: in the stone is i guess the most key element
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: but even that like it's still kind of down.
• 33:49
  Speaker 8: It was like a pedestrian it was just sort of
• 33:51
  Speaker 8: like oh yeah and by the way he pulled the
• 33:53
  Speaker 8: sword out i guess everybody yeah well we could have
• 33:55
  Speaker 8: killed him then yeah i was just like Other times.
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: That was our big sword in the stone moment. And
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: that was the most we had.
• 34:03
  Speaker 8: And he's like a line jumper.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: And he's like, well, hang on. But it's different because
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: when he got up there, it's like he didn't know.
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: I was like, I guess if he knows, then he's like,
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: get out of the way. You guys are wasting your time.
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: I'll just go ahead and take care of this right now.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: So I assumed he was going to shove his way
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: up there and go, hey, guys, watch this. And pull
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: it out and just start beating people's ass. But the
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: fact that he seemed confused when he pulled it out
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: and passed out that I'm like, Well, then why were
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: you cutting in front of everybody except you're just kind
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: of a dick? Yeah. So, yeah, I was just like.
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: But he's the ruffian from the. He's from the streets.
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: The red district.
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: The streets. The hardcore streets with a Z.
• 34:39
  Speaker 8: And those elephants.
• 34:40
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, that was going to be my first note. We
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: got sidetracked. Yeah, I mean. To me.
• 34:44
  Speaker 8: The whole thing like borrowed so heavily from like all
• 34:47
  Speaker 8: kinds of.
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: Cannibal. Not the TV series. No, well, I was also
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: kind of the other way. Like, even before you get
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: into the stealing that it might do on other stories,
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: it kind of blows its wad right there. I'm like,
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: as cool as a few other things are by the
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: end of the movie, I'm like, nothing kind of gets
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: as epic as those elephants.
• 35:10
  Speaker 8: As that first elephant scene.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: And that's like five minutes in. And once that's over,
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: you're like, oh. Like, the rest of the movie is like, well.
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: That's okay.
• 35:17
  Speaker 8: And also, I kept thinking the whole time, I wonder if,
• 35:20
  Speaker 8: If he got a call from like a.
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: Oh, what's his face? God, see.
• 35:25
  Speaker 7: No, no, no, no.
• 35:26
  Speaker 8: From a.
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: I'm going to meet an old friend. Lord of the Rings.
• 35:29
  Speaker 8: Lord of the Rings dude.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 35:31
  Speaker 8: Why can't I think of his name?
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: Are there elephants in Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings?
• 35:36
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: Yes. I've kind of... It's been.
• 35:38
  Speaker 8: Yeah, there's giant war machine elephants.
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah. I kind of remember that.
• 35:42
  Speaker 7: Elephants.
• 35:42
  Speaker 5: Elephants.
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: I saw the whole first one, but I don't think
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: I've revisited any.
• 35:46
  Speaker 8: Yeah, there are these big... That kind of thing.
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: Which chapter is that?
• 35:50
  Speaker 3: Well, it's in the two towers.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: No wonder I blocked that one out the most.
• 35:56
  Speaker 11: Because Legolas does that tricky maneuver where he kills everyone
• 36:00
  Speaker 11: on the elephant and then gracefully slides off.
• 36:03
  Speaker 8: Slides down the snoot.
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: And then flips his hair and looks pretty.
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: And then John Rhys-Davies.
• 36:10
  Speaker 8: Says that it's only one. Why do they take these
• 36:14
  Speaker 8: wonderful epic stories and turn them into these bad George Lucas-y.
• 36:19
  Speaker 11: Comic strips comic strips lucas doesn't even make movies anymore
• 36:23
  Speaker 11: no but i mean dated.
• 36:24
  Speaker 8: Reference it is i am a dated reference how about
• 36:28
  Speaker 8: that who's that that's.
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: Get out there was one actually you're lucky if you
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: don't know who zach snyder is um so yeah i
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: don't know that was kind of my thing is like
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: the first few minutes there i'm watching these elephants tear
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: the hell out of things and the cg's not horrible
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: so i'm just like all right, I can watch Elephant's
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: Tear shit up.
• 36:48
  Speaker 8: It could be kind of cool.
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: It's all right. And then like that whole little opening
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: scene there is kind of interesting and it does throw
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: our characters into the middle of all this. And I'm like,
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: all right, we're on some sort of track. It might
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: be the right one. We'll see. And then by the
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: time we get like the credits out of the way,
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh no, this is still kind of
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: a slow, boring medieval movie. And then it gets into
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: the weird editing. So I'm like, okay, now it's a slow,
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: boring medieval movie. That they're cramming in snatch editing. Yeah.
• 37:16
  Speaker 8: But that's what I thought the whole thing would be.
• 37:18
  Speaker 8: And that's what it should have been. It should have
• 37:20
  Speaker 8: been a grittier.
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: That's what he did with Sherlock Holmes.
• 37:23
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: He already took an old timey story. And I know
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: people complain about it. And crammed it. And people bitch
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: about that too.
• 37:27
  Speaker 8: But I still thought it was fun.
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: I thought it was a cool. I love Sherlock Holmes.
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: I thought it was fun. I thought it was great.
• 37:32
  Speaker 8: It was a good meshing of his style and an
• 37:34
  Speaker 8: old story.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: But it was helped by the acting. The acting was
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: superb in Sherlock Holmes. Well, and those guys specifically, Robert
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: Downey Jr. has no problem being funny and quippy. And
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: being the charismatic weirdo that he is, he can make
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: that stuff work even when it shouldn't. Because I've even
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: said that about Tony Stark. I'm like, The lines that
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: are written, if given to damn near anyone else in Hollywood,
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: would fall flat. It would be awful. And he makes
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: them work every time. I'm always kind of amazed by
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: that element of him that I'm like, I think that's
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: just him. I think that's just Robert Downey Jr. in
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: the real world. He can just do that with anything,
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: so he makes it work on screen. So I think
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: that's part of it, too. And I don't know that.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: No offense to our King Arthur, that was the other
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: thing is I once again realize, and this happens quite often,
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: when I'm like, I don't watch these TV shows. I
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: don't know who the hell that dude is. And that's
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: the thing. I went down his list. He's in a
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: couple of movies, but the only reason people know who
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: he is is from TV shows. So I'm like, I
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: didn't watch.
• 38:38
  Speaker 8: He was in Pacific Rim, right?
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: He was in Pacific, and that's the one I went,
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: oh yeah, I guess I've seen him.
• 38:42
  Speaker 8: And I know people hated that movie, but I liked
• 38:44
  Speaker 8: Pacific Rim.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: He, and most of what goes on in Pacific Rim
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: is kind of forgettable though. And I think that's, That
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: to me is like the fact that I didn't remember
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: him when I went, oh, it's from Pacific Rim. No
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: wonder I didn't remember him.
• 38:55
  Speaker 8: This movie does prove one thing that he is not
• 38:58
  Speaker 8: a movie star. Like he's just not got the I mean,
• 39:01
  Speaker 8: he's good on TV, but he's not got.
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's weird, though.
• 39:04
  Speaker 8: He's like the third Hemsworth.
• 39:05
  Speaker 3: He has no panache.
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: Well, he's like the poor man's Hemsworth.
• 39:07
  Speaker 8: The poor man's Hemsworth.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: That's the problem.
• 39:09
  Speaker 8: The poor man's Hemsworth.
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: Because he's charming enough.
• 39:11
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: I'm watching him. I'm like, he's a handsome dude. He's
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: kind of charming.
• 39:14
  Speaker 8: And he seems like a nice guy for real.
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: I see it working under certain circumstances, but.
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: It just doesn't land.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: It's bad. It's poor delivery.
• 39:22
  Speaker 11: And I would blame that on the editing. Whoever edited
• 39:26
  Speaker 11: that movie did not get the pacing right.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: Oh, everything, it was a mess.
• 39:31
  Speaker 8: The whole thing was so.
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: And it's back and forth. It goes to those little
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: signature segments for our director, but then it goes back
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: into relatively slow, normal, old-timey, medieval story editing. And there's no.
• 39:48
  Speaker 11: Characters, like the ones that you think you kind of
• 39:50
  Speaker 11: care about, there's no development of those characters.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: We don't even spend much time with those two. The
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: girl mage.
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: The girl mage and.
• 39:58
  Speaker 8: Who doesn't even have a name.
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: Aiden Gillen.
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: Girl mage. Girl mage.
• 40:03
  Speaker 3: Goose fat. Bob or Goose Fat Bill?
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: What was it?
• 40:07
  Speaker 8: Kung Fu Steve?
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Kung Fu Steve.
• 40:09
  Speaker 8: That's what his name was?
• 40:10
  Speaker 11: You know, like, these are characters that they show at
• 40:13
  Speaker 11: the very beginning and you're supposed to, like, care about them.
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: I think it's George. And yet there's no backstory. You
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: don't know what's at stake.
• 40:20
  Speaker 3: Or anything like that.
• 40:21
  Speaker 8: Well, and, like, this was the thing that totally threw
• 40:23
  Speaker 8: me that made me realize, like, there is no backstory.
• 40:28
  Speaker 8: When they knight him and Arthur is knighted by Goose
• 40:31
  Speaker 8: Fat Bill... Well, I think that means that Goose Fat
• 40:35
  Speaker 8: Bill was already a knight of some variety.
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: I guess, but we don't really know. But we don't know.
• 40:40
  Speaker 11: That's the implication, but I'm stupid.
• 40:45
  Speaker 8: Because I'm a costume nerd, right? And he's got the
• 40:48
  Speaker 8: most high-end costume.
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: He's wearing the most official.
• 40:50
  Speaker 8: He's got the most official, and it looks like good stuff.
• 40:53
  Speaker 8: And he also has awning. Heels, if you notice his boots,
• 40:56
  Speaker 8: which gets me back to the short guy thing.
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: Because he's super short. Because he is super short.
• 40:59
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: I don't know that.
• 41:00
  Speaker 8: IMDB says he's like 5'10, and that's pushing it. Because
• 41:03
  Speaker 8: it's like, Charlie Hunan's boots are like this.
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: Hunan.
• 41:09
  Speaker 8: He's got like lifts and like heels. So I'm like, man,
• 41:12
  Speaker 8: that is one short dude.
• 41:13
  Speaker 3: Anybody want Chinese?
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: We did.
• 41:15
  Speaker 8: And then we tried to get it, and there was
• 41:16
  Speaker 8: nowhere to open it for the movie.
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, would you explain that to people? Because I.
• 41:21
  Speaker 8: Charlie Hunan.
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: And you spent the entire night discussing that? We did.
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: Who not?
• 41:25
  Speaker 8: Amongst other things.
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: Well, because I didn't know who the hell he was.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Because you weren't paying attention. I was like, who's this guy?
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: He thought he was at Hemsworth. See, that's what I'm saying.
• 41:34
  Speaker 8: Is he at Hemsworth?
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: Is he a brother? Well, I did the same thing.
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: I was watching the... latest and maybe last terminator movie
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: and i'm just like how did this chick get to
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: be the lead in this movie oh i don't know
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: game of thrones like i'm sorry i'm out of the
• 41:50
  Speaker 2: pop culture world in television obviously well i didn't have
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: fancy cable i didn't watch it.
• 41:55
  Speaker 8: I was thinking that the time i spent watching king
• 41:58
  Speaker 8: arthur would have been better spent like re-watching game of
• 42:00
  Speaker 8: thrones really i mean i would have been a better
• 42:03
  Speaker 8: experience Yeah.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: I love that movie. That's the one I was comparing
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: it to. I was like, I'm like, it's so hard
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: to put together a sort of modernized sense and yet
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: a medieval story. And I'm like, but that got it
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: so right. Night's Tale kind of does it. And in
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: a way that like, it hits you over the head
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: with it at moments. Yeah. And yet somehow walks away
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: and you're like, no, that was okay. Like you don't
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: get angry at it, other than the beginning when they're
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: singing along to Queen pisses me off a little bit.
• 42:31
  Speaker 11: There was character development. Oh yeah, a lot for those
• 42:36
  Speaker 11: other side characters. There were elements that were understated. They
• 42:41
  Speaker 11: didn't hit you over the head with the comedic value.
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: And then when they did, it was effective. It was
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: genuinely funny. Yeah, it kind of works. And their bad
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: guy had.
• 42:49
  Speaker 8: That good bad guy also kind of camp thing going on.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Which brings us to Robin Hood.
• 42:56
  Speaker 8: We consider this the modern version of Kevin Costner's Robin Hood.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: Not Men in Tights?
• 43:02
  Speaker 7: No.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: Another one that can't pull it off. The Costner. The
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: Costner one.
• 43:07
  Speaker 3: The Costner, who played the Sheriff of Nottingham.
• 43:10
  Speaker 8: Alan Rickman.
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: Classic.
• 43:12
  Speaker 8: Yeah, and that was such a great villain in such
• 43:16
  Speaker 8: a terrible movie, and they couldn't even get a great
• 43:19
  Speaker 8: villain in this.
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: And he was funny.
• 43:22
  Speaker 11: And there were those elements in King Arthur where I
• 43:27
  Speaker 11: felt like that's what they were trying to do.
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: Like, are you trying to be like, is this tongue-in-cheek?
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: But like, you keep referencing the villain. Are we talking about,
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: what's his name? Who is the other? Who plays Vortigern?
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: Jude Law. Yeah, okay. I was like, that's the only
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: villain I could think of, really. And I'm like, I
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: never even got funny out of him. Like, he was
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: so run-of-the-mill, like, Just straight-laced medieval role. No, he wasn't
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: doing the funny, but it was King Arthur's cohorts. King
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: Arthur and his guys were always wisecracking. Every five seconds,
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: there was some quip.
• 44:06
  Speaker 11: But Jude Law was trying to be over serious.
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: He was in a different movie. He was actually playing
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: everything straight.
• 44:14
  Speaker 8: He and Eric Bana were in a different movie from
• 44:16
  Speaker 8: everybody else.
• 44:17
  Speaker 2: He and Eric Bana were trying to update Excalibur. Excalibur.
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: It might have worked if you went that direction.
• 44:23
  Speaker 8: They were in a totally different film.
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: They kind of were. Because I was like, I don't
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: hate what Jude Law's doing. And maybe that became... I
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: wasn't thinking about it at the time, but maybe that's why.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: Maybe by comparison, I was responding to him because... he
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: was pulling in some decent acting there versus the other
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: guys are kind of screwing around and the tone doesn't fit.
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: That's it. But his tone probably fit the story that
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: he needed to be told.
• 44:47
  Speaker 11: He's the only character I cared about because he murdered
• 44:50
  Speaker 11: his wife and his daughter.
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: I guess that's another one of those when we get
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: to basic storytelling problems because I remember him killing a
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: lady at the beginning and I'm like, I guess that
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: was his wife? Did they specifically?
• 45:05
  Speaker 8: No, but you see her at the beginning.
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but shouldn't we? That's a major moment in the story.
• 45:11
  Speaker 11: Because she asks him what's wrong in a wifely manner.
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but still. To have that much hinge on this
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: action Like we should understand the responsibility Of what he
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: just took on By offing his wife To do this
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: thing And I got none of that until the very
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: end of the movie You can't be bothered with it
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: And I backtracked and put it together And went oh
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: yeah well that's why he But I didn't feel any
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: of that weight That he should have felt That the
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: audience should have felt None of that was there And
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: much like when we got to the end I'm like Well,
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: I guess because she said father, that's his daughter.
• 45:49
  Speaker 8: Otherwise, did we know he had- All he said to
• 45:52
  Speaker 8: her was put the bird back in the aviary.
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: I mean, yeah. He said things to this random girl
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: in the castle a couple of times, but I had
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: no idea that was his daughter. There was no relationship there.
• 46:02
  Speaker 2: So there's no weight to that decision.
• 46:03
  Speaker 8: What happened with the girl that was like the mole? Like,
• 46:08
  Speaker 8: she has this big conversation with him, remembering she's like,
• 46:10
  Speaker 8: you're gonna hang for your blah blah. And then, I
• 46:13
  Speaker 8: don't even remember.
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: That was one of my others.
• 46:15
  Speaker 3: She gets out.
• 46:16
  Speaker 2: She escapes with Blue, the boy.
• 46:19
  Speaker 3: They're in the prisons. But you see that, like, for, like,
• 46:24
  Speaker 3: half of a second.
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: That's one of my other issues.
• 46:27
  Speaker 8: She was such a build up.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: What the fuck is up with the giant snake? It
• 46:32
  Speaker 2: came out of nowhere. The closest other cool thing that happened.
• 46:35
  Speaker 2: I was like well there is a giant snake.
• 46:36
  Speaker 8: If she's a giant snake why couldn't she do something else?
• 46:40
  Speaker 2: Why didn't she do that at the very beginning? Just
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: take them all out with the giant snake. We already
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: had a giant animal. But that, I mean, that was
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: one of the other things. In addition to the fact
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: that his band of merry men weren't very developed, but
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: the fact that we had no useful female characters, like
• 46:59
  Speaker 2: the mage was the closest thing and she had a
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: decent amount of screen time, but we got nothing from her.
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: She just sort of cryptically said things and did an
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: occasional spell and then disappeared. And like all these other,
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: there are all these other women that are on screen
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: and But we get nothing from them. I'm like, again,
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: even the wife and the daughter that should have been
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: a big part of the storyline are just completely wasted.
• 47:24
  Speaker 11: There were video games that were more well-developed than this movie.
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: Cut scenes are better developed than this.
• 47:31
  Speaker 8: Part of it reminded me of, oh, it's like they
• 47:33
  Speaker 8: made Skyrim into a movie. Like when they're fighting the
• 47:36
  Speaker 8: giant rats and stuff.
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah i'm like oh it's like skyrim yeah the
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: skeevers yeah i mean there are again like it would
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: go this is another weird thing that i'm like some
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: movies can pull this off and then some like you
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: kind of have to like have the rules set when
• 47:50
  Speaker 2: you get into a medieval slash leaning more towards fantasy
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: type of movie is like what exists in this world
• 47:57
  Speaker 2: what's going to go on here and how fantasy are
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: we going to get and this one would go like
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: 20 minutes of kind of being in the real world
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: and And then it's like we get to some crazy
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: mythical kind of a thing, and I'm like, okay, are
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: we making that kind of movie now? And then it
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: would go back and be like 20 minutes of just
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: boring dialogue of a normal world. Because that's the thing,
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: when we got to Ursula... When we got to Tentacle Lady,
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: who I just immediately started calling Ursula. Ursula and her sirens.
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: She had two hot sirens and then she was creepy Ursula.
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: So I was just like, okay, that's cool. Like that
• 48:35
  Speaker 2: scene's actually cool. Again, kind of belongs in a different
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: movie because it doesn't work with the other silly stuff
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: going on later. But I'm like, that's kind of a
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: cool thing. But I'm like, it comes so out of
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: left field that you're like, what? okay, I guess we're
• 48:48
  Speaker 2: making that kind of movie.
• 48:50
  Speaker 11: You know, I kind of get the feeling that he
• 48:53
  Speaker 11: had initially planned on making this a three-hour movie and
• 48:57
  Speaker 11: then got pressured into making it a two-hour movie.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: Could be.
• 49:01
  Speaker 8: It's supposed to have five other movies. There's supposed to
• 49:05
  Speaker 8: be six of them.
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: At the same time... That's not his normal MO. Sherlock
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: Holmes is in a three-hour epic.
• 49:13
  Speaker 11: It's the only thing that would explain how disjointed everything is.
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: It is very disjointed.
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: It feels like.
• 49:20
  Speaker 11: From one scene to the next, you're like, there's this
• 49:23
  Speaker 11: whole section of information that I'm missing.
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: I also, again, I didn't do a ton of backstory checking.
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: I just kind of wanted to go in fresh and
• 49:32
  Speaker 2: discuss it and whatever. But it does make me think
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: I'm like, Because I also was like, didn't he just
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: make Man From U.N.C.L.E.? I was like, this was quick turnaround.
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: I'm like, was this already in the works? And he
• 49:42
  Speaker 2: got thrown into it? Maybe that's why there are these
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: uneven parts that maybe he didn't have as much to
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: do with. I don't think so. And then it's like,
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: let's flash on this montage scene and I'll put that together.
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: Don't worry, guys. So it feels cobbled together from another
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: person maybe. I don't know that that's true, but I'm like,
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: that's what it feels like to me. It's like you
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: took two different movies made by two different directors and
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: slapped them together.
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: What was the one movie with the other guy from Game.
• 50:07
  Speaker 11: Of Thrones, like the War of the Gods or, you know,
• 50:13
  Speaker 11: the Egyptian thing?
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: Oh. Prince of Egypt? No. There's another newer one. Nicholas
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: Coaster Waldo, whatever his name is. What's the name of
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: that movie?
• 50:24
  Speaker 3: Eye of the Gods.
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: Something of the Gods. Yeah.
• 50:26
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 50:27
  Speaker 11: It's like whoever made that movie, which is not great,
• 50:32
  Speaker 11: did half of King Arthur.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: And then, like, he died. And then they were just like, um,
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: who's got a break? Somebody get Guy Ritchie on the phone.
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: They just put his Sherlock 3 on hold. So he's
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: really got nothing to do now until they greenlight that again.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: Are they doing a Sherlock 3? It's rumored. I looked
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: at IMDb earlier just to get the rundown of, because
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: it really was. Within two years, he already had Man
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: of Uncle done out. This thing's in the theaters, like.
• 50:59
  Speaker 2: In the early part of the next, you know, year after.
• 51:01
  Speaker 8: But there was obviously a problem with it because it
• 51:04
  Speaker 8: was supposed to get released and got pushed back.
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: Which made me, that's part of what I, I do
• 51:08
  Speaker 2: remember reading that like right after I saw it and
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: I was just like, doesn't that put it like dead
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: on top of Man From U.N.C.L.E. coming out? Like, had
• 51:16
  Speaker 2: he not just finished that and would have to be
• 51:19
  Speaker 2: six weeks into shooting this one for that timeline to
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: have him involved in it the whole time?
• 51:24
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I don't know. It's a weird one. And I
• 51:26
  Speaker 8: think that there were definitely obvious problems with it. But
• 51:29
  Speaker 8: then to put it out at this time of the year,
• 51:31
  Speaker 8: it's like, I told Paul, I'm like, that's something that
• 51:33
  Speaker 8: may have been better in the autumn.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Or February, March.
• 51:37
  Speaker 8: Well, not that bad.
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: It feels like what gets dumped around that time. No
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: offense to it, but it does.
• 51:43
  Speaker 8: No, but the winter epic. As you get into the autumn,
• 51:45
  Speaker 8: people want those epic games.
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: Kind of, but then that's when you're already gunning for Oscars. No,
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: but this is not going to get an Oscar. This
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: ain't going for Oscars. I mean, that would be obvious.
• 51:55
  Speaker 2: It does feel like something that gets dumped in February.
• 51:58
  Speaker 8: There's nothing in this that is Oscar worthy.
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: It was released along with some shit. Huge movie. It's
• 52:05
  Speaker 2: sandwiched between what's probably going to be the two biggest
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: movies of the year. And for that reason, the next
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: one's going to fall on its face probably.
• 52:14
  Speaker 8: Because they tucked it in there, we thought that it
• 52:16
  Speaker 8: was because they knew it was a stinker and that
• 52:18
  Speaker 8: people would go see Guardians of the Galaxy and it
• 52:20
  Speaker 8: would be so packed that they would be like.
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: I guess we'll go see King Arthur. I guess we
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: can't get a seat.
• 52:25
  Speaker 8: Can't get a seat.
• 52:27
  Speaker 3: And it's for that reason that I'm glad we saw
• 52:30
  Speaker 3: King Arthur.
• 52:30
  Speaker 2: Because no one else is going to see it. this
• 52:34
  Speaker 2: is and i wanted.
• 52:35
  Speaker 8: It to be like one of those things where i
• 52:36
  Speaker 8: was like oh my god it's fabulous more people should
• 52:39
  Speaker 8: go see it.
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: I mean there are those and the more it's this
• 52:43
  Speaker 2: past day that i've been thinking about i keep thinking
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: of other ones that are like kind of along these
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: lines that are but are a little more fantasy and
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: like they lean on the fantasy and they make it
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: work and i'm just like that's what we should be
• 52:54
  Speaker 2: watching like why the hell are we watching king guard
• 52:57
  Speaker 2: they're like.
• 52:58
  Speaker 8: And if you think about the way they've done Game
• 52:59
  Speaker 8: of Thrones, so you've never watched it, right?
• 53:02
  Speaker 2: Not really.
• 53:02
  Speaker 8: Why do you not watch it?
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: It's good.
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: I didn't have cable when it started. Then you're seven
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: seasons behind.
• 53:08
  Speaker 8: Well, you just gotta watch it.
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: I don't have time to marathon this shit. I got
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: a show to run.
• 53:12
  Speaker 8: So it's fantasy and then grit. Like, you can't, you know,
• 53:17
  Speaker 8: it's good at that. It blends the two well and it...
• 53:20
  Speaker 8: Rides that line.
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: Again, cable shows like that. That was originally what made
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: them different. We can do.
• 53:28
  Speaker 3: An epic long-form.
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: Story, but we can also show nudity and violence and cursing.
• 53:34
  Speaker 2: Softcore porn. Yeah, it's basically we can do whatever the
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: hell we want because we're cable, but we can still
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: tell a long story type of thing that's not like
• 53:43
  Speaker 2: an NBC 10 o'clock drama. We don't have to abide
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: by those rules. We can be gritty and edgy and pushy.
• 53:49
  Speaker 8: But that's what I'm saying. You can do it. So
• 53:51
  Speaker 8: there's no reason they couldn't have made a grittier King
• 53:54
  Speaker 8: Arthur episode.
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, obviously the audiences are okay with it.
• 53:57
  Speaker 8: Yeah, and especially like.
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: Speaking of.
• 54:00
  Speaker 8: Why would he make such a.
• 54:01
  Speaker 3: Speaking of grit, I think the dirtiest scene in the
• 54:05
  Speaker 3: movie was when he's wandering the wilderness and it's the
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: Lady of the Lake scene.
• 54:10
  Speaker 11: The very brief, with no history, Lady of the Lake scene.
• 54:15
  Speaker 3: And he is face down in the mud and.
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: He pulls the sword up and he's screaming. And you're like,
• 54:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know why he's screaming.
• 54:24
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 54:25
  Speaker 2: He's yelling and people are looking for him. He looked
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: into the future and saw the take on this movie.
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: He's like, no! I gave up three months of my
• 54:35
  Speaker 2: life for this.
• 54:36
  Speaker 8: I said to Paul, was that supposed to be his mom?
• 54:38
  Speaker 8: I'm totally confused now.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: See what I'm saying?
• 54:41
  Speaker 8: That would make sense if the lady of the lake
• 54:42
  Speaker 8: was his mom.
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: It shouldn't be that questionable. Because she got killed.
• 54:46
  Speaker 8: Was it his mom?
• 54:47
  Speaker 2: I still want to know. I don't know. I thought
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: it was supposed.
• 54:51
  Speaker 8: To be his mom, maybe.
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 54:53
  Speaker 8: Which would make sense if that made it kind of
• 54:55
  Speaker 8: more touching.
• 54:56
  Speaker 11: I would have bought that if they had bothered to
• 54:59
  Speaker 11: explain that.
• 55:00
  Speaker 8: But did they say before that the Lady of the
• 55:03
  Speaker 8: Lake gave his dad the sword? Am I missing something?
• 55:06
  Speaker 8: Did I mishear? I mean, I don't even know what
• 55:09
  Speaker 8: I watched.
• 55:09
  Speaker 2: I think that the Lady of the Lake is a
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: mythical critter.
• 55:12
  Speaker 8: Yes, but it would have been cooler if... If she
• 55:16
  Speaker 8: was his mom, right? Like if that was what she
• 55:19
  Speaker 8: became after she died because she got killed.
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean, his dad became the stone. Yeah. In
• 55:25
  Speaker 2: the sword and the stones. I mean, I guess it's
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: not that far fetched really.
• 55:28
  Speaker 8: And she's the lady of the lake. That would make
• 55:30
  Speaker 8: sense to me.
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: I guess.
• 55:31
  Speaker 8: But I'm not sure. But I think that that would
• 55:33
  Speaker 8: be way cool. They should have done that.
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: Maybe they did.
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: Take on it. Again, if you don't want to do
• 55:39
  Speaker 2: this exactly the way we've seen in the past, that's fine.
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: It's not like you have to adhere to the real world.
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: It's kind of a mythological tale anyway. So it's like
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: you can take license and do different things with it,
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: but it just made the wrong call a lot of times.
• 55:57
  Speaker 11: Just another 30 minutes spread throughout the film would have
• 56:01
  Speaker 11: done it.
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: Extra extra plot expansion and and that's the thing there
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: are moments that work in it like and even some
• 56:08
  Speaker 2: of the dynamic between the guys in the group and
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: like if you could have like brushed up that dialogue
• 56:15
  Speaker 2: and made it not sound so silly and semi-modernized in
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: a way that it probably shouldn't be there are moments
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: when it doesn't seem right i don't know it's really
• 56:24
  Speaker 2: hard to cram in that like storytelling part that he
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: does That type of editing, that type of delivery into
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: this old-timey story. But I think he could do it.
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: It could be done, but it's a tall order. Like,
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 56:38
  Speaker 8: But I think that, I mean, if there's anybody that
• 56:40
  Speaker 8: would be capable of that, it's him.
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: I would think, at this point.
• 56:43
  Speaker 8: Because he's done it so well in the past.
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: It's been so much of his life.
• 56:46
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean, you could take Snatch or Lock, Stock,
• 56:49
  Speaker 8: Two Smoking Barrels, whatever. It's the same thing. You still
• 56:51
  Speaker 8: get those, the character depth and the... personality you know.
• 56:57
  Speaker 3: Of well and that's why i i.
• 56:59
  Speaker 8: And everything fits together beautifully in those.
• 57:01
  Speaker 11: That's why i said what i said about the story
• 57:03
  Speaker 11: being too large for the delivery method like his his
• 57:09
  Speaker 11: impact is generally on a simple story with complicated circumstances
• 57:15
  Speaker 11: That you get to see all the characters do their
• 57:19
  Speaker 11: daily thing and go through their situations and it's interesting.
• 57:22
  Speaker 11: Whereas this, the story was way bigger than any of
• 57:25
  Speaker 11: the characters.
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: And so you couldn't, there was no way he could
• 57:30
  Speaker 2: do it within 120 minutes.
• 57:32
  Speaker 8: No way.
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't see it happening. I think it just
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: takes some impressive writing, which we didn't have.
• 57:42
  Speaker 3: Maybe that's it.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: Maybe the person was not the director. Again, it's been
• 57:49
  Speaker 2: a long time since I've watched Excalibur, but I feel
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: like it maps everything out. The relationships are pretty well
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: fleshed out. I feel like there is a way to
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: do that in an old school, more traditional way. So
• 58:02
  Speaker 2: you can still do that. It's just not done here.
• 58:05
  Speaker 2: And then he wanted to cram his type of stuff
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: on top of it.
• 58:08
  Speaker 8: In my mind, it should not have been done in
• 58:10
  Speaker 8: a traditional way. It should have been a Guy Ritchie film.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: But they wanted to do both. Yes. I think that's
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: the problem.
• 58:16
  Speaker 8: You can't ride that line.
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: I think that's the problem.
• 58:18
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: You can't commit to one or the other.
• 58:20
  Speaker 11: Like Jude Law is trying to be, you know, play
• 58:25
  Speaker 11: the serious part and be an Excalibur. And so was
• 58:28
  Speaker 11: Eric Bana. They were trying to be an Excalibur. And
• 58:31
  Speaker 11: everyone else was trying to be in Snatch.
• 58:35
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 58:35
  Speaker 8: I mean, it was just so disjointed.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: It didn't work.
• 58:38
  Speaker 8: I was really disappointed.
• 58:40
  Speaker 2: Like I said before, and I think that comes back
• 58:43
  Speaker 2: to it, why even bother telling this story if you're
• 58:45
  Speaker 2: not going to put any weight on the pulling the
• 58:48
  Speaker 2: sword out of the stone? If the lady in the
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: lake has ten seconds... Is the whole thing just to
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: have the table reveal at the end? Because that was
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: the only other element. I was like, aha, there's a
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: thing that ties into this dumb name. So I'm just like,
• 59:03
  Speaker 2: other than that, couldn't you have just done sort of...
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: I mean, take that pulling the sword out of the
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: stone part in the middle, but... this like the kid
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: getting because i mean is that is him being grown
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: up on the streets and having to like come is
• 59:16
  Speaker 2: that part of the original arthur's story that he's like
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: his parents get killed and he Grows up as an orphan,
• 59:24
  Speaker 2: sort of. It's the Moses story. Yeah, that's what it
• 59:27
  Speaker 2: seemed like more to me. So it was weird that
• 59:32
  Speaker 2: that gets crammed in there if you're not going to
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: focus on that stuff. I'm like, if you were just
• 59:36
  Speaker 2: going to, again, hardcore, I love King Arthur and all
• 59:40
  Speaker 2: the stuff around it. I'm going to focus on that.
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: But it's like, we don't get any Merlin goings on.
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: We don't get any. You don't even, you're about Merlin,
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: but you never see him. And I'm like, why make
• 59:50
  Speaker 2: a King Arthur if you're not going to have Merlin?
• 59:53
  Speaker 2: Like what?
• 59:56
  Speaker 11: Why couldn't Merlin have been a woman? We don't have
• 59:59
  Speaker 11: any useful characters. It would have been very easy for
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 11: them to say, oh, this is Merlin. Merlin is a woman.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 11: Instead of the mage and her having half-assed scenes, make
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 11: it a useful scene. She's a representative of Merlin.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: And she is the new Merlin. I'm fine with that.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 2: That would have been cool. Yeah.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 2: I don't know. It's very frustrating. So that's my thing.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 2: It's like, why did they latch on? And that's what
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: I'm back to. Is that the studio pressure part of it?
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 2: Is it just name recognition like everything is? It's like, oh,
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: people know King Arthur. They'll come see that. Joke's on you.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: But I'm like, if you just made a generic medieval
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 2: story about a kid that gets orphaned and then he
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: grows up to have to battle this evil king, similar
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: to what we have here, and did it better... and
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: put it in the Guy Ritchie style, like is that
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 2: what's throwing it off, is that they're trying to do
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: a semi-serious King Arthur story when they could have done
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 2: a medieval story that was not that out of, The
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 2: loop of what Guy Ritchie normally does.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 11: If you think about it, it really was the complete
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 11: Moses story.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: Kind of.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 10: Yeah.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 2: With some Harry Potter thrown in.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 11: Even with the plagues, you know, except they were doing
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 11: it with terrorism.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 3: But, you know, it's the same idea, except for the
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 3: giant snake.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 4: That's J.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: Murray's secret.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: That would have been like the locust, the plague of
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 3: giant snakes.
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 8: Don't you hate when giant snakes attack i mean it's
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 8: funny that you know we have so much to say
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 8: about a lot of bad movies but this was just
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 8: so like confounding.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 2: Well that it didn't want to be a bad it.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 8: Didn't want to be a bad movie yeah it's true.
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 2: Well i think that's it it just because by the
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: end i'm like that was my thing as i'm thinking
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: like what are we gonna talk about and like that
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 2: was because i'm like i don't even really hate it
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: like i can't i don't vent on it as like
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: a horrible horrible movie because it's not horrible it's just
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 2: badly slapped together in different forms and like yeah but
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 2: like the individual scenes i'm like this isn't badly done
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 2: like the actors.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 11: Aren't that's why i think it's a we should all
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 11: go and shoot the editor it falls.
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 2: Somewhere in the middle yeah i don't know someone needs
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 2: to stab the eyes.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 8: But if you look at it on paper in my
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 8: mind i'm a nerd like everybody in it works like
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 8: the cast works the story idea works but then it
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 8: gets out there and it's a wreck.
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 7: You've got the wrong man, sire.
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 10: I was born in a brothel on a bridge in Londinium.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 7: The sword can only be drawn by Uther Pendragon or
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 7: his direct heir. You felt it, didn't you? The power
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 7: is what put you out. You just don't know how
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 7: to control it.
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: So what happens now?
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 7: You know what happens now. You're quickly becoming a legend.
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 8: That was the other thing I wondered. Like, when you're, like,
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 8: a director or whatever, and you create a huge bomb, like,
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 8: how do you.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: Well, and in years past, I could have blamed it
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: on the wife. And that's the thing. I will first clear,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: I've made two examples of this. It's all Madonna's fault?
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 2: They both come back on the woman, but I don't
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: mean it that way. I'm just like, I try to
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 2: look at it as these weird dynamics that come into play.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 2: And I said it for years on the show about
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 2: Tim Burton. Oh my God, I love her.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 8: You cannot say that about her.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: Look at his movies and tell me that's not true.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: He made the worst movies in his, he had great
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 2: stuff in the beginning, hooks up with Homewrecker. Granted, he's
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 2: a homewrecker too. He's a homewrecker. Again, I will call
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 2: him out fully for that. But I'm just saying, when
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 2: those two are together, he makes, with a couple of
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 2: minor exceptions, the worst movies of his life. Now they
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 2: don't live together, his last couple of movies are back
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 2: to being good again. I'm like, it's, I mean, it's,
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: it's not without a little bit of like weight to
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 2: that story. And then looking at this, it's like, he
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 2: makes two out of the gate that are like amazing.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: Like people saw like, Only a handful of people originally
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: saw Lock, Stock, and Two Smoky Barrels, but they were like,
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: what the hell is this? Who is this guy? And
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: then we get to Snatch, and the whole world's like, no,
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 2: this guy's the next big thing. And then Madonna. Like,
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 2: it was. It was the same year. Snatch comes out.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: He's the biggest name in the film industry for that
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: week and a half. And then by the end of
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: that year, he marries Madonna. And like, it dies. Like,
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: he doesn't make a movie for years. When he does...
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 2: It's Swept Away. Oh, God. He made that? With Madonna. Yeah.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 4: Oh.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: And it's, again, one of the biggest bombs of life. Like,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 2: people still reference that as a joke.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 5: Which movie?
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 2: Swept Away. I didn't realize he made Swept Away. Madonna's
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 2: bad remake of another movie that nobody cared about. What
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 2: are you talking about?
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 8: That had Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 2: The original. That's a different... They're remaking that, by the way.
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 2: They're remaking Overboard, by the way. So, that aside.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: But then look, he does a couple more movies that
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 2: nobody cares about. Like by the time, like the first
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 2: one that's sort of a blip on the radar is
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 2: Rock and Rolla, which I still haven't bothered to watch.
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 2: But like I've at least people that are like his
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 2: kind of movies are like, oh no, that's kind of
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 2: coming back into his. And like that year they get divorced.
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: And the next thing he makes, Sherlock Holmes. back on
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 2: his game back to making multi-million dollars.
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 8: People talk about how bad those sherlock holmes movies are
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 8: which i don't think but.
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 2: Again like to me if you like his type of
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 2: filmmaking like granted it's hard for any of them to
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: live up to those first.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 12: Yeah those first two you can't a really solid weird
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 12: indie movies like even snatch for the budget that it
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 12: got is just kind of because he had a little
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 12: buzz behind him yeah and you could sucker people like
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 12: brad pitt into coming over but.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 2: It still was a pretty low-budget movie, and he was
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: still kind of an indie director. So that's kind of,
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 2: I think, why the dynamic works so well in those movies.
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 2: Now he's got big studio money thrown at him. So again,
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: I can't even blame the ex-wife anymore. He's years behind that.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: So this is just a lot of bumbling, I think,
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 2: on studio levels. And him, I don't know how attached
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: he was to the King Arthur story. Do we really
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 2: think he was that committed? Because if so, I feel
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 2: like you wouldn't make this movie. Like you'd want, like
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: that was, I mean, the more I like, again, just
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: like looking at this when I went to like read
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 2: the big dumb title, I'm just like, it's, how does
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 2: it phrase it? The Legend of the Sword.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 4: The Sword.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: Do we feel like we got a legend? And is
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 2: any of this really about the sword?
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 8: No.
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: Like, it's the legend of King Arthur, kind of, maybe.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 11: It's the legend of King Arthur's dad dying.
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And his mom. There is a sword, and it
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 2: does come into play a decent amount, but it still
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 2: isn't really... And turns into the stone.
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 11: And maybe his mom turns into the.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 3: Like, that's a legend.
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: But all of that.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 3: I didn't hear that, but that would be a legend.
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: Even as much as the sword comes into play, once again,
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: there's no weight behind it. It doesn't feel like it's
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 2: a big part of the story. Specifically, a story that
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 2: is named after it. The legend of the sword... It
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 2: should be like, the opening should be like the opening
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 2: of Conan. It's, we're forging this sword. This sword is
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 2: going to make the man and the country come together.
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 8: But then you do see Merlin for like two seconds, right?
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: In the flashback at the beginning, yeah.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 8: Because he's forming the sword out of the staff.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 2: So again, that's, I don't know. It just feels like
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: it doesn't live up to titling the movie about the sword. Yeah,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 2: it was a real stinker.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 11: And the tower's There was talk about towers and like
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 11: there's several different towers and one's destroyed and making another one.
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 11: Trying to build another one bigger than the other one.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 11: And there's this new one like built on the.
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 3: Remnants of an old one. I don't know.
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 2: I mean, they flew a plane into it. That seemed
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 2: really out of it. There's towers.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 3: There's towers.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 2: I don't know. It was an inside job. There's towers
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 2: and Nicolas Cage was in there.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 3: Merlin was involved.
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 2: We all know that.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 8: Yeah, it was a real shit show.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 2: I don't even know that it's that. Again, if it
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 2: was worse, I could throw that kind of... But it was, though,
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 2: because it was just a mess. It's just a big... Yeah. Yeah,
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 2: it's just muddled.
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 3: It had high hopes. But I think we should revisit
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 3: it later when it goes straight to video within the
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 3: next week.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 8: Like on cable? I'll watch it on cable.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 2: Like it'll be at Target on Blu-ray next week.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 8: And then, you know, once we see it one more time.
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 2: You'll be able to stream it on Netflix.
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 8: We'll actually figure out like more things to make fun
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 8: of because I'm sure we've missed some things.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 2: Because we were like, God, well, you know. I don't
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: know that I'll buy it, but then when I can
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 2: watch the elephant scene on YouTube, I'll just go to it.
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 2: I'll be like, yeah, that's pretty cool. All right, I'm
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 2: done now.
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 11: There was one part that I cared about and that
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 11: was when Blue's dad is killed and there's like the
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 11: son father exchange and you.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 8: Know reservoir dogs and he gets his ear cut.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 13: Off yeah and you're and you're like oh no and
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 13: the dad's like get him out of here and he's
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 13: like yeah i will and there's a thing that happens
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 13: and and i briefly.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 11: Really i did fleetingly i thought oh well he really
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 11: likes his son I.
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: Mean, there's moments that the characters, again, it could work.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 2: Like there's things where like we're buying him as being
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 2: the badass from the streets that he's supposed to be.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 2: Like early on when we're like. The joke of, how
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: do you get money from a Viking? And, like, okay, well,
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 2: he's obviously a badass. Like, he went and got, and, like,
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: he walked in unarmed and got the Vikings to give
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 2: him the money that they owed him. Like, you're building up,
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 2: once again, you're not building up King Arthur, but you're
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 2: building up an interesting character in this medieval story that
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 2: you could have told that had nothing to do with
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: the legend or the sword or King Arthur or any
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 2: of these things.
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: That don't factor into it very much. So I think
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: that's the thing. There are those moments when I'm like,
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 2: you could have told a fun medieval story if you'd
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 2: just devoted yourself to that and gotten rid of all
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 2: these distractions.
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 3: Of King Arthur.
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 2: They just need to rename it King Arthur, Legend of
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 2: King Arthur. Or take all that out and be like,
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: the legend of some dude that grew up on the streets.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 3: Who happened to be named Arthur.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 2: Jimmy Arthur. But it's not the one you think. Jimmy Arthur,
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 2: the legend of a guy.
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 8: The legend of a guy.
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 2: Coming soon. I don't know.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 8: I mean, you know, and you think like, well, how
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 8: would I have done it differently?
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 5: Right?
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 8: So you kind of start to think in your head like,
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 8: how would I play this out?
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 8: Well, it was so confusing. I can't even think of
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 8: what I would have like flip-flopped.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 2: I just would have.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 3: You know what I would have done?
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 11: I would have focused on a secondary character like see
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 11: the story through a secondary character's.
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 2: Eyes like we're like he's got a kid following around
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 2: the whole time like.
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 3: Him or or perhaps one of the you know the uh.
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 11: Hookers one of the terrorists you know like aiden gillen's
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 11: character or the other the other guys that are like
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 11: almost tertiary to the story yeah and see the story
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 11: through their eyes like They're the one taking you along,
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 11: and that would be easier to tell the story.
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: Actually, the best option would be the mage. She's always
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 2: kind of there. She's sort of involved, but he becomes
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 2: the big lead character.
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 11: And then you get a return back to the mystical
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 11: nature of King Arthur and pulling the sword from the
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 11: stone and the magic.
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 2: Because she's more like.
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 2: She could be a little more removed from the story
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 2: and be our narrator that maybe would explain some of
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 2: this crap going on that we don't understand.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely. If we would have had some on-screen narration, that.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 2: Would have been great.
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 8: I mean, usually that's ham-fisted and clunky.
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 2: That's bad. In this one, we probably needed that. If
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 2: you're narrowing it down to two hours, you better have
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 2: a narrator.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 8: You could have arrows pointing.
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 3: Some circles and diagrams.
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: Well, again, this is Guy Ritchie. Like, you'd think it'd
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 2: be like, this guy is Arthur right here. Now, let
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 2: me tell you about him and, like, do it a
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 2: little more wacky.
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 8: Well, and, I mean, you know, they do, like, that
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 8: whole Guy Ritchie breakdown.
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that whole story. And it worked well. Him telling
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 2: the story is pretty silly. So, if you wanted to
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 2: take it down that road, like, again, it'd be way
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 2: better to just commit and do that version of a
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 2: silly story. Again, at least I'd give him credit for
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: being like, even if it went wrong, I'm like, no, no,
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 2: you made your movie, Guy Ritchie. It doesn't land, but
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 2: you did it.
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 8: But you did it.
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 2: It was a guy's deal. That would have been way
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 2: more enjoyable than what we saw. Yeah, at least it
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 2: would have felt like, you made your movie, right or wrong,
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 2: you know, Points to you for doing it.
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 8: It was obviously his.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 2: It became midway in like, oh, but I kind of
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: like Excalibur. I want to make a serious movie too.
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 2: You know, and what is really eating at me is why,
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 2: why it happened.
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 13: Like, was it political that he, it, sucked or was
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 13: it just accident.
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 2: I mean it definitely the fact that it got delayed
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 2: as long as it did means there's problems at a
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: very basic level in the studio with the production any
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 2: and all of the above so i think it really
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 2: did have problems from the inside and we're seeing what
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 2: comes out.
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 11: Yeah yeah and and he probably just said all right
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 11: fine i'll put out a.
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 2: Movie he's like yeah it's like i'd Again, he's back
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 2: on schedule now. That's what's funny is that big lull
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 2: in the middle. And ever since then, it's like every
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 2: other year, he's still kind of knocking out movies. And
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 2: most of them have been relatively well received. I mean,
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 2: I even heard pretty good things about Man From U.N.C.L.E. Yeah,
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 2: I heard that it was good too. And they're still
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 2: rumoring possibly a sequel. It made just enough money that
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 2: they're like, eh, maybe we'll green light that.
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 8: Which brings me to what I'd like to see next.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 8: Because I rarely see... Like movies, right? Like this is
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 8: weird that I actually went to see a movie and
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 8: I actually want to go see another one. But if
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 8: I'm going to go see something, I'm going to go
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 8: see Blockbuster. Let me guess.
• 1:14:34
  Speaker 2: The Kingsman. Oh, the new Kingsman.
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 8: The new Kingsman.
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 3: I like the first one.
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 8: The thing that I liked most about going to see
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 8: Arthur was that we saw the trailer for the Kingsman.
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 8: That was the best part of the movie.
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 2: Matt Vaughn's a cool filmmaker.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 8: And I did not expect to like the first one.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 8: I was like, whoa.
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 2: And I was like, aw.
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 8: Well, this is kind of charming.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 2: It was enjoyable.
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 3: They brought the camp back to 007.
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 8: To the Bond vibe.
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like found its own way to do
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 2: a 007 type of story when now 007 kind of
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 2: doesn't work.
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 8: For a lot of people so it's like.
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 2: It's finding a different way to do that it's.
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 8: Still quirky like it's got a lot of quirks to
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 8: it and I love that about it so I'd like
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 8: to see the new one.
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 11: I just hope they remake Moonraker with the Kingsman I
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 11: think that would be great oh.
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 2: How do you cast Jaws these days trying to decide
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 2: who's our go to Jaws cast I just want somebody
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 2: in a.
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 11: Horrible horrible space suit doing like the horrible moonwalk in
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 11: obvious gravity you know Who.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 8: Would you cast as the new Jaws?
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 2: There's a guy I work with. We're just going to
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 2: people we know now. I know a guy.
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 8: Out of the people you know, who would you cast
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 8: as Jaws?
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 10: I don't know.
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 8: That's a good question. So that looks good.
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 2: I would see that. Not Moonraker.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 8: Not a remade Moonraker.
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 3: I'm looking forward to Aliens.
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 2: Are you really? Because that's my final question as we
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 2: head out of this one is, are you willing to
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 2: come back for Alien?
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 10: Oh, yeah.
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I want to see it.
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean, in fact, I feel kind of bad.
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 2: You don't want to be disappointed two weeks.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 10: In a row.
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 8: My Arthur idea was terrible, and, you know, sorry about that.
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 3: No, no, no, wait a minute.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 2: Now, I think that the bad movies are equally as important.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 3: As.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 2: The good movies.
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 8: But it wasn't bad. Like he said, it was just
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 8: kind of.
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 2: It's mediocre-ish.
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 8: Which makes it really kind of uninteresting to talk about.
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 3: Well, the fact that you didn't care about the movie
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 3: made it.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 2: It's part of the problem.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 3: But you were like going to care. That makes it compelling,
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 3: I think. Because, you know, there's this.
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 2: I came in wanting to care. There's hope and then
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 2: complete like... you know, there's like abandonment now. I think
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 2: it says a lot. They abandoned us. If I, if
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 2: I revisit my response to your suggestion, I think it
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 2: says a lot about where we ended up. I believe
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 2: you were like, we're like, Hey, we can talk about
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 2: a movie this weekend. You were like King Arthur, like
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 2: immediately just fired out of the gate. King Arthur. And
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 2: I was like, But you realize for us to talk
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 2: about it, we would then have to go see King Arthur.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 2: And you were like, yeah. I'm like, all right. I
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 2: just wanted to point out a fairly important detail. We're
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 2: going to have to watch that movie.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 8: Well, I didn't know it would be so just disappointing.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 8: But the alien one, I'm not sure how I'm going
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 8: to feel about that either because I love Prometheus.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 2: Oh, Lord, you're the one. We do need you then
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 2: because I need somebody to hold down the Prometheus fort. Oh,
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 2: my God.
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 3: I like Prometheus.
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay. Well, now you have to come back. We
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 2: should save this for next week.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 8: Well, I need to rewatch Prometheus then, too.
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 2: Prometheus was Excalibur set in space. Oh, God. We should
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 2: wrap up now. On that note, leading into next week. Okay, kids,
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 2: get out your decoder pins.
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 2: .
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 9: For you members of the Secret Circle.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 8: So are we going to go see the new Alien movie?
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 2: If you're up for it.
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, let's do it. What, does it come out Friday?
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 2: I believe so. Yeah, Danny McBride.
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 8: Yeah, because we were supposed to see it this week
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 8: and then.
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 2: I know, I thought it was this week and instead
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 2: it wasn't. So we ended up here, so.
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 3: That's right. King Arthur and the Legend of the Sword.
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 2: Go see it today. The guy.
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 4: Suckers.
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 2: On video. On VHS or beta. On your Netflix right now. Slowly,
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 2: while you eat a cheeseburger.
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 11: You too can watch King Arthur.
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 2: Seems more like a turkey leg kind of a movie. Whatever.
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 2: You gotta wear your renaissance gear and eat a turkey leg.
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 8: Did you know that that's really emu?
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 3: Bucket of KFC.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 2: It's emu.
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 8: The turkey legs are emu. Those aren't turkey legs.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 11: Yeah when was the last time you saw a turkey
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 11: that had a leg this big.
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 8: So also i want to go to a ren fair
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 8: can we go to a ren fair and then do
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 8: a review of the ren fair oh yeah that'd be
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 8: awesome let's do that.
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 11: Actually we could do the ren fair we could do
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 11: we could do the recording from the ren fair Unless.
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 2: We find a movie that we can tie into it,
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 2: because believe me, I've done just as many dumb things
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 2: in conjunction.
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 13: A night sale.
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 2: All right. Yeah. I mean, I'll watch a night sale again, so.
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 8: Come on, Ren Fairs are awesome.
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 11: I mean, we should have tied in King Arthur to
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 11: a Ren Fair, but then we just have to bitch outdoors.
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 8: You know what always happens?
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 7: In the heat.
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 8: I always end up at a Ren Fair during Pirate Week.
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 4: Oh, God.
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 8: Have you noticed that every time we go, it's been
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 8: like Pirate Week?
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 3: Or Viking Week.
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 2: No, it's never been Viking. I'm not wearing my Starfleet uniform.
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 11: But the Viking show came out, and now Vikings are
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 11: popular again.
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 8: Vikings are in.
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 2: You're not necessarily going to make me like this.
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 3: They're terrible people, the Vikings.
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 2: I hear they won't give you any money. Nice. It's
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 2: kind of hard to get it out of them.
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 8: You brought it full circle.
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 2: The bastards owe me money is what I'm saying.
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 8: Have you ever gone to a Ren Faire?
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 2: I try not to because then there's Ren Faire people.
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 6: Oh my God.
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 8: You, who love all kinds of nerdy things, don't love
• 1:20:11
  Speaker 8: going to like a nerdy Ren Faire?
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 2: You are a caricature of a nerd. No. Not that
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 2: kind of caricature of a nerd.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 8: I mean, even if just people watch, it's funny.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 2: It's fun.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: So wait, wait.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 3: So yes or no? Have you been or not?
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 7: No.
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 3: Thank God, no.
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 11: I will pay your way if you go with us
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 11: to a run.
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 8: But it means you have to ride in the truck
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 8: like in the middle because that's the only car that
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 8: will fit three people that we have.
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 2: I spent time around someone who was part of that
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 2: group and even that was.
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 2: So I'm telling you, it's going to be a hard
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 2: sell once I'm in the middle of that.
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 3: Face your fears, son.
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 7: I'm not.
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 2: That's what I've said. I've never said I won't go
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 2: to one. I just haven't gone to one because I
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 2: don't really want.
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 4: To go to one.
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 2: But I've never said I won't go. That's a fair point.
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 3: You know, and honestly, you can sort of do it
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 3: in about an hour and a half.
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 8: Yeah, it really doesn't take.
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 2: I'm okay with that. We're not an all-day Red and Fair. No, no.
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 2: I can point and laugh at people for an hour
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 2: and a half, no problem. We do it all the time. Oh,
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 2: have you seen the documentary Darkon? You remember that? Oh,
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 2: that's good.
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 8: What smells like feet?
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 3: It's this.
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 2: That is horrible.
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 8: God, you had, like, feet for dinner.
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 3: No, well.
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 2: Maybe. Sort of. You don't know.
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 3: But it was in a fried roll.
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 2: That makes it okay.
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 3: I'd eat any foot in a fried roll.
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 2: Cannibalism is fine as long as it's deep fried. Guys,
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 2: it makes it okay. Oh, so good. I'll put it away. See,
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 2: this is way more interesting than King Arthur.
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 2: All right, so we shall return possibly for Alien next week.
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 2: We'll have to see what suckers show up for it.
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 8: Are you coming over?
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 2: We're going to do it here?
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 8: We'll make dinner.
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 2: Are you going to serve?
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 8: I'll make coffee.
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 2: Is something going to burst out of someone's chest and
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 2: we eat it?
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 8: Yes, I'm going to make a carrot cake.
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 2: No, I want a giant egg. A really big egg.
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 8: To go back to emus, I have an emu egg.
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 2: They're blue.
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 8: They're beautiful.
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 2: Oh, you know what we ought to do? It's just
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 2: a giant robin.
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 11: We ought to have the podcast about aliens as I
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 11: change the oil on the truck.
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 2: Why? The black goo. I don't know if that's enough
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 2: reason to warrant that. Like if we were doing Days
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 2: of Thunder. Which we've never seen.
• 1:22:41
  Speaker 3: We could talk about.
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 8: We've never seen Days of Thunder.
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 2: You're okay. You'll see why. I've never seen Cocktail either.
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 2: Let me tell you something.
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 8: I did not see Dirty Dancing until I was.
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 2: You were saving up for the TV production. And Top Gun.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 2: She didn't see Top Gun until.
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 3: She was 32.
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 7: Well.
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 2: Again, there's things that I saw at the time and
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 2: thought were fine. And I revisit them and go, oh, yeah,
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 2: there's some issues here.
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 8: I love Dirty Dancing. Even though I didn't get to
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 8: see it until I was 32. It's not that I
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 8: didn't get to see it. I avoided it because I
• 1:23:15
  Speaker 8: was one of those kids. I was like, I don't
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 8: want to see this.
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 2: Well, that's a chick flick.
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 8: I'm going to go see.
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 2: That's the thing. I watched it a ton when I
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: was young. Only later people were like, oh, this is chicks.
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, I don't know. I just thought it
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 2: was a movie. I didn't really think about it that
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 2: much at the time. I don't think I thought about.
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 3: It, but I knew that I didn't care for it.
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 2: Johnny's cool and he wears a leather jacket. He's pretty cool.
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 2: There's a whole lot of dancing involved. And it's abortion.
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 2: That's cool, right?
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 8: That's a thing, right?
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: It's funny how many, like, it's one of those, again,
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 2: looking at it now, how many people, like, for a
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 2: certain group of people in the world and certainly this country,
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 2: that's the key of that movie. Like, oh, that's the
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 2: abortion movie. Like, it's weird how much that factors in
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 2: for a lot of people.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 8: Did you grow up Catholic?
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 2: I don't think anyone wants to discuss that.
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 8: Well, here's why I bring it up. Because my family
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 8: was Catholic. My mom's side of the family is Catholic.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 8: And we would get this newspaper called The Record.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 2: Oh, I remember seeing that.
• 1:24:23
  Speaker 8: And it had like.
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 2: I avoided that, but I didn't even know why. It
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 2: just looked boring to me.
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 8: It is boring.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 2: I'm like, boring newspapers, lame.
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 8: But it would always make me laugh because it had
• 1:24:30
  Speaker 8: like the movies that you shouldn't see and the books
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 8: you shouldn't read.
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 2: So I was like... This is my to-do list.
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I was like.
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 2: Check, check, check, check.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 8: But that one came up, like Dirty Dancing. I was like,
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 8: I won't go see that one because I'd... Girls in
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 8: my class like it.
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: Stupid 12-year-old girls. You don't know what you're talking about.
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 8: So I think I saw The Last Temptation of Christ,
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 8: and I was like, that movie's phenomenal. But that was
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 8: like a big one that they were like, you should
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 8: not go see The Last.
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 2: Temptation of Christ.
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 8: And I was like, well, it's got a Peter Gabriel soundtrack,
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 8: so you keep me from it.
• 1:25:02
  Speaker 2: David Bowie, people, come on.
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 3: Was Footloose on the list?
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 10: I don't know.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 8: I don't remember.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 4: Not a gotta.
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 3: I loved Footloose as a kid.
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: I didn't see Footloose until.
• 1:25:12
  Speaker 8: You know what I love to confuse? This is how
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 8: I started to love to confuse movies. I like to
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 8: confuse Tremors and Footloose.
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, I mean, no one could do that.
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 8: It's a movie and they can't dance because if they dance,
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 8: then the giant worms will come.
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 2: I mean, it does cause vibrations. I mean, that's sort of,
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 2: to me, you could actually super cut that into a
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 2: pretty interesting movie on YouTube.
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 8: Let's make that happen. Has that happened yet?
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 2: You get to work. You're in charge of the editing
• 1:25:35
  Speaker 2: of that. Get on it.
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 8: It'll be like a Guy Ritchie thing.
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 2: It won't make any sense.
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 8: Get on it.
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 2: You could do a YouTube video, a mashup of... Yeah. See,
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 2: that's the most tremors. It's not a legitimate thing to confuse.
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 2: You're just ridiculous. But it would be a fun thing
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 2: to put together on YouTube. So get to work on that.
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 2: It's like Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward or like.
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 3: Getting ready to run across the desert.
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 2: And then you cut to him going, let's dance.
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 8: And then the worms through the sand.
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 2: I just see like big, awkward Chris Penn slamming around
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 2: trying to dance. And then like worms going, oh my God,
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 2: what is that noise? So much vibration. Stop dancing, Chris Penn.
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 2: I have good ideas.
• 1:26:20
  Speaker 8: I'm not good for some things, but I've.
• 1:26:21
  Speaker 2: Got great ideas. That's pretty fun, actually.
• 1:26:24
  Speaker 3: I think that's a pretty good idea. Someone, someone, somewhere
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 3: should do that.
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 8: You guys get them on it.
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 2: Not a gala.
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 3: Not gonna happen.
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 8: Not a gala.
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 2: Not a gala. That having been said, we shall return
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 2: somewhere in the near future. Otherwise, that about does it.
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 2: We will return next time saying Geek Feed. Thanks for listening.
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 2: I thought that was a party! Let's dance!
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 10: Young men came from hunting, faint and weary. What is that,
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 10: my lord, my dearie?
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, brother dear, let.
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 5: My bed be made Bright field, bright for the woody
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 5: night shade.
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 10: Of the light of a mage's moon but it's not
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 10: by bone but yet by blade.
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 6: That can break the magic that the devil made and
• 1:28:09
  Speaker 6: it's not by fire but what's forged in flame can
• 1:28:15
  Speaker 6: drown the sorrows of a huntsman's.
• 1:28:52
  Speaker 2: This young man, he died fair too young.
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 10: To the hunter's moon T'was not my bone Nor yet my.
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 6: Blade Oh, the berries of the woody nightshade Oh, father dear,
• 1:29:21
  Speaker 6: lie heavy safe From the path of the devil.
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Make it happen.
• 1:30:37
  Speaker 10: Get on it, Muller.
• 1:30:39
  Speaker 7: What am I doing?
• 1:30:39
  Speaker 8: You're making Dorito bags.
• 1:30:41
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:30:41
  Speaker 2: It's your new thing. I thought you were hand painting these. No, no.
• 1:30:44
  Speaker 8: We just print them. Yeah.
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 2: We're like silk screening our own bags. Yeah, we're silk
• 1:30:48
  Speaker 2: screening our own bags. A printing press.
• 1:30:49
  Speaker 11: A hand printing press.
• 1:30:53
  Speaker 8: Well, all that's a while while you're building a new
• 1:30:55
  Speaker 8: fence out back. That's your next project. Dorito bags and
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 8: build a fence.
• 1:30:58
  Speaker 2: I think you want to do it hand printing press
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 2: style so at some point when we come up with
• 1:31:02
  Speaker 2: a new character we can run in and go stop
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 2: the presses and then we can Hand you this new.
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 8: I thought you were going to say do it like letterpress,
• 1:31:09
  Speaker 8: so it'll be hipster.
• 1:31:10
  Speaker 2: Hot off the presses. Never mind. Dorito bag. You don't
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 2: know how to sell outright.
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 4: This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 4: edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 4: The Empires. For more on how to sponsor or support
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 4: the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com.
• 1:31:27
  Speaker 10: Talk hard!
• 1:31:35
  Speaker 2: This program is a proud member of the Battleship Pretension Fleet.