Latest / Serious Beef Podcast / You're Not Playing Mancala

Transcript

You're Not Playing Mancala · Serious Beef Podcast

0:00
I'm Abby and I'm Anna, and this is serious beef.
0:02
Welcome. You don't have to speak up if
0:04
you're too quiet. I'm being too quiet today.
0:06
I'll skip this towards you. I apologize.
0:08
Sorry, listener. Little bit better.
0:12
Let's see it. I have a little gusto.
0:14
I have a little energy. OK, I need some caffeine or
0:21
something. I get what you got.
0:23
You got. What is that?
0:24
It's a coke, so that's a better. I got a thing about Diet Coke I
0:28
got to tell you about. Oh, OK, OK, cool.
0:30
Some of beef today though. Not today, not today.
0:32
Diet Coke lovers. Relax, relax, Diet Cokes.
0:37
We're not coming off the table. The beef.
0:40
I got a different beef today. All right, what's your beef?
0:42
My beef with Mancola. I I happen to know what Mancola
0:46
is. Listen, if you don't know, it's
0:48
a game, it's a game. OK.
0:50
It's like a little wooden board and there's like 12 little pits
0:54
kind of drilled into it and then there's 2 like.
0:57
Or carved, depending on. What?
0:58
Yeah. Well, that's what I mean, Yeah,
0:59
yeah. Or or and then there's 2.
1:02
They call them stores or a capture pit or whatever, these
1:06
larger on the end, each end. Yeah.
1:10
And. And you have the six in front of
1:12
you, and the person across me has a six in front of them.
1:14
All right. Now, if you don't know what man
1:16
call a board looks like, look it up Google.
1:18
We'll probably post a picture. Of course, we'll post a picture.
1:21
Yeah. So anyway.
1:23
And you have little beads or seeds or whatever.
1:25
Beads, seeds, rocks, whatever you got.
1:27
And here's the thing. I played mancala a lot growing
1:32
up, you know. Yeah, it's a simple game.
1:35
I played, man, called a lot growing up.
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I played over grandma's a lot with my.
1:38
My aunt I know. I had a board at school and
1:40
several teachers had them. Yep.
1:42
And you end up getting a rainy day, You'd play it, you know,
1:44
recess. Absolutely.
1:45
Now here's where my beef comes in.
1:47
OK, let's hear it, parents. Of children who listen to this
1:51
podcast, teach your children how to pant play man collar right
1:55
before you send them to school. Because I'm out here, they're
1:59
the abbeys of the world are out here trying to play man collar,
2:02
right? And some little snot nose third
2:04
grader is playing it wrong and they don't want to listen to me.
2:09
And they're like, well, that's not how we played it on wolf
2:11
titties, buddy. Out in the real world we play by
2:13
the rules. In 3rd grade.
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Fucking rules. Now here's the thing.
2:20
The issue is, is that a man call aboard never comes with
2:24
instructions. Thank you for the piece of wood
2:26
Sir. And the rocks.
2:29
Intrinsically know the rules I. Guess.
2:32
So now how do you know you were taught the right rules then?
2:34
Because I just looked it up and I'm right.
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OK, she went to the Google, googled it.
2:37
It was worth a Google. It was worth a scholastic.com is
2:40
my source, so if you've got an issue with this, take it up with
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the fucking book fair. What are you playing me and?
2:48
Carla, make sure you yell at your volunteer who's running the
2:50
book fair. We're there peddling their
2:56
erasers and they're posters of Green Day and they're Little
3:00
Erasers. We're going to, we're going to
3:02
volunteers all across the area. Those pencils that you can pull
3:05
a little pieces out of and you would eventually lose 1 because
3:09
all fucking pencils. Worthless.
3:11
Because then they all fall out. Yeah, all the volunteers are
3:13
going to quit and be like somebody got all pissed off
3:16
about, man, I'm not working here no more.
3:22
You don't even. Sell me, paying me.
3:26
Oh my God, that's awesome. OK, so this is what happened.
3:28
OK, All right. What happened so?
3:30
When you got your little things, there's supposed to be 4 in each
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thing, OK, When you start, when you start now when you play the
3:36
game, you pick up the little seeds or the rocks or what have
3:39
you, whatever you want to, you know those little like rock
3:42
things that the little, they're like the little.
3:44
Gems. And they're kind of flat on one
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end, Yeah, they don't roll everywhere.
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Everyone, everyone knows what these look like.
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Everybody has. Experienced.
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You can get them at the craft store.
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Yeah, Yep. And so when you like boop, boop,
3:54
boop and you drop them one at a time in each.
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Of those you know, subsequent little little you pick up, you
4:00
pick up what's in your pit, whichever 1 you choose to pick
4:03
up from, and you have to drop one at a time and your goal is
4:06
to get all of yours. Or the most into your end, Yes,
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into your, your final. I'm going to call it listener.
4:13
I'm going to call it a a store if you will, because that's
4:17
what. Because you call them on these
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or your, we used to call it your home or something, but whatever,
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yeah. We'll call the home, we'll call
4:23
the home. That's your end.
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And whoever has the most at the end, once they're all in the
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home, correct, you win. Now here's the thing.
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Here's the very key important part.
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OK? So when you are dropping them
4:35
in, obviously you want to get them into the the home.
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Yeah, if the last beat in your hand goes into the home, yes,
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you get to take another turn. Correct.
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But if you have to go, if you have two men, if you have some
4:49
left and get to keep, continue on to the other side, right,
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your turn is over, your turn is over.
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But if you end on the home beat, yes.
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Right, Yeah. So if you've got four and you
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get little 3 pits in front of you and then the home base,
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boom, boom, boom, the 4th 1's going into the home and you get
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to go again, right. Yeah, some idiot.
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Some snot nose third grader. Apparently idiot kid is telling
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me, well, anytime you get a beat in the home, you get to go
5:15
again. Wrong.
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Wrong. Wrong.
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That's wrong. Wrong.
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And who am I? I can't argue.
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You've got no nothing to back me up here.
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I got no rules. I got nobody backed me up.
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Everybody's learning my color wrong at home.
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I'm like what? Are you talking about if if you
5:31
did that, you just keep on going all the time?
5:33
Yep. Now, according to Scholastic,
5:35
when the last seed in your hand lands in your store or home, and
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we're calling it take another turn, it don't say every time
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you got one of the correct. Last one I agree with you.
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We should know better than to record.
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At my house, I know too many things and too many people.
5:58
Now, were you aware of? This I don't know when the last
6:01
seed. These the the Scholastic Book
6:03
fair is referring to this and it's not the book fair but
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Scholastic. Is a company.
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Scholastic's referring to these as seeds, not rocks.
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It doesn't matter what you play with.
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I know, but I just want to clarify with listeners.
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Understood. When the last seed in your hand
6:16
lands in one of your own pits, if that pit had been empty, you
6:21
get to keep all of the seeds in your opponents pit on the
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opposite side. Oh, I didn't know that.
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But those captured seeds, as well as the last seed that you
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just played on your side into the store, That's what, that's
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what Scholastic says. It's what the man says.
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What now? I don't know anyone who ever
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played by those. No, never.
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I've never heard that. And.
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And another thing this says, and in the game the.
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Now this is where I start to question you, Scholastic.
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The game is over. I know, I know.
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I'm gonna make signals on the Scholastic created by Alicia
6:57
Zimmerman for classroom use. We're going to look her up.
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OK, Alicia, that really is your real name.
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Who can say? Who can say?
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Keep going. Ending the game.
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The game is over when one player's pits are completely
7:10
empty. That's true.
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The other player takes the seeds remaining in her pits and puts
7:16
those seeds in her store. No, no.
7:19
That would have been no Nisha. No, Absolutely no.
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What the heck the fuck? Why would you?
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They put them in your store, maybe that's what I'm saying, Or
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they deduct them from theirs. Yeah.
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No, you don't just automatically get what's left on your side.
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That's why I'm. I've got.
7:37
I've got some issue. Yeah.
7:41
All right. What are the official rules?
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Of main policy. I don't know, man.
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This one says OSP. I don't even know.
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This is Washington. I was oh, sorry, the Washington
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Office of Superintendent of Public Instruction.
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Well, thank you, Washington. I think the state, not the
7:56
thing, but the man. I thought it was the man.
8:00
No, his official George. Washington rules for mankind.
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You know, James Washington was playing so much Mankala, he.
8:09
Had that cherry wood board. He had a business.
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On the side. He made cherry wood board and
8:14
sold him. Well, a strange joke.
8:20
They were beautiful, OK? OK, now here's the thing.
8:23
Yes, she's learned. This motherfucker says it the
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same thing. Wow.
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OK, no, what? OK now it doesn't make any
8:31
sense. First player goes OK, drops each
8:34
stone, blah blah blah. If your last stone goes into
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your store, you get to go again. OK, Not the flatest fucking
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inning we can all be in agreement on.
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That we all agree. Agree with George on that one.
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Yeah. And Alicia?
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Yep. If your last stone goes into an
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empty space on your side, move that stone and any captured
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stones, those directly across from your on your opponent side
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to your store. OK, the game ends when either
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player has no more stones in their six circles or remaining
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stones go to the other player store.
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Can you believe? That I know you just fucking get
9:04
them. I have to disagree.
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I sorry George, but that that seems silly.
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Sorry, George. So basically fine I I finish my
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side first, but just go ahead and take all of yours like that
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doesn't? Now this is Mancala for young
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players and it says first player chooses circle, picks up stuff
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blah blah blah. Next steps drops one stone going
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counter clockwise until all stones are played out.
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The the rules are optional depending on the age of the
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player. You got no beef whatsoever.
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You're done. Your beef is.
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Over this says this says the the rules.
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Asterisks are optional. That's like every fucking.
9:45
Every rule and so basically everybody was right.
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However, their rules. However, the.
9:50
Washington, Washington. No, I'm talking about
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traditional man color. This is what's a traditional man
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color. When I come in, when I come into
10:01
third grade, I expect my opponents to be versed in the
10:05
rules of traditional traditional mankala.
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Do man send your no matter what you know?
10:13
What are those parents doing at home?
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What could they possibly be doing that would be?
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More. Important than teaching your
10:18
kids how to play Mankala come. On what I'm saying is if you're
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teaching your kids how to play Mankala, you teach them right or
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don't teach them at all, and I'll teach them when they get
10:26
to. School.
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That's true, that's true. I'll teach them.
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You should volunteer and go on to each class.
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No me. In 3rd grade, I'm.
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Just going to teach them my time is bad.
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I thought you were going to be on a mission.
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Let me sure all kids knew how to play mancala.
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One of my coworkers bust. Up the Mancala board.
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I'll teach them. I'll teach them right there.
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I'll teach them my school. Y'all in Mancala but do not, do
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not. Teach your children the wrong
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rules to Mancala. And this is from Abby, who knows
10:53
how to play I think who knows the rules for most games and and
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how hard. Is it to play make?
11:00
You, you are. You have to also remember you
11:03
pick up on the rules of games very quickly, and everybody
11:07
does. The last rock goes in your home,
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you go again. Otherwise it's the other
11:12
person's turn. This is not a complicated
11:15
concept. I'm just.
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Trying to give that poor little third grader the benefit.
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He knows who he is, and he knows what he did.
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It's a trick to a. Specific kid.
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Oh, boy. OK, this sounds like you need a
11:29
little more therapy on this. You got a little more anger, a
11:31
little anger. You got a little anger.
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I got some beef. I got beef.
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It's serious beef. This is serious.
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This is No, this is not light beef.
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Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't like lean beef.
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I never had. The podcast was called Lean
11:47
beef. It's called Serious.
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It's. Called Serious beef.
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OK. So I think what's important is
11:54
that we all take away that sportsmanship is what's above
11:56
all, above all else. And if you're not playing by the
12:00
rules, you're not. You're not playing, man.
12:02
Kala. You're not playing if you're not
12:13
playing by the rules, you're just playing.
12:16
Me playing Parcheesi, Well, that's that's about right.
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Holy shit. Oh my God.
12:23
You know what? Real quickly thinking about
12:25
games did you? I didn't get to watch much of
12:28
the Olympics this time. God, me either, and I.
12:30
Love the Olympics I think. We.
12:32
We've told that to many a listener that we love the the.
12:35
Yeah, we keep saying it. We also keep missing it, but we
12:37
keep saying that. Unfortunately when it's on, it's
12:39
online. That's true.
12:46
It's not during the day, it's live during the day because
12:48
they're over in, you know, Italy, Milan, yes.
12:52
And Cortina and whoever she may be, it's the next city.
12:55
It's the two city. There were two cities hosting.
12:59
You get to share it now. You don't just get a, you don't.
13:01
Well, it's because of where the mountain ranges were and things
13:03
like that. I see.
13:05
So some mountains get to decide, well, you know what, for skiing,
13:09
yes. But yeah, they some events were
13:12
in Milan and then somewhere in Cortina, depending on where the
13:15
venues and the mountains and things like that were.
13:18
But big news, both women's and men's hockey won gold.
13:23
Over. Canada beat Canada.
13:25
The men's hockey won for the first time since the Miracle,
13:29
The Miracle and Ice Story, which was what, back in 198018801980?
13:34
Yeah. So that was pretty, pretty
13:37
freaking awesome. They had, if you can find a clip
13:39
of it, they had Kurt Russell, who played the coach in that
13:42
movie. The movie made of that, of that.
13:45
If you haven't seen that movie, it's incredible.
13:48
Give a watch. Yes, I have Dan.
13:53
I watched it. Are you kidding me?
13:54
I was on the phone this morning, Anna, I am on the phone with you
14:00
and you were telling me this Kurt Russell did this thing.
14:02
I was like, oh, I was like, I've never seen the movie Miracle.
14:05
And you go, yeah, neither have I.
14:06
Those are. Those are yours.
14:09
Well, that was way too early in the morning then, because that
14:11
was a big fat lie. I have seen those movies.
14:13
I was. Like, oh, we'll have to get
14:15
together and watch this. I will watch it again, it's that
14:17
good. So I have No Fear.
14:18
I have No Fear. I would watch it again.
14:20
You. I thought I was like, Oh well.
14:22
You know, I've watched it with that.
14:23
No, I've watched it with that. It's very good.
14:25
And so Kurt also, who plays the coach in the movie, did the kind
14:29
of this voice, you know, how they make the they make these
14:32
dramatic videos for TV introducing the Olympic players
14:38
and how they've all had a tragic background.
14:41
If you don't have one. Come on, they will make one up
14:44
for you and get Kurt Russell to narrate it.
14:46
They're. Going out and kidnapping your
14:48
dog right now? Just to make sure.
14:49
You've got a, you can have it back if you win gold, but we
14:53
have to give you a, we got to give you a.
14:54
Something tragic back story, something tragic to motivate
14:57
you. And motivate the.
14:58
Fans so so they actually had Taylor Swift do a fun intro for
15:02
the ladies who were skating for gold, for figure skating hot
15:05
damn, which was very cool and because she and she would be
15:09
like meet, you know, Alyssa did it and she would say a little
15:11
thing and it was very cool and then her song OPA Light was
15:14
playing and yeah so it was really cool and then they had
15:16
Kurt Russell do one for the men's hockey team of course and
15:19
so it was because incredibly. Cool ice is a big part of the.
15:23
Thing. And he's in the Thing, He's in
15:25
the movie, The Miracle. Well, there is that.
15:29
Oh, you're talking about the movie The Thing.
15:30
The movie, The Thing. Oh my freaking God that was a
15:32
stretch that. Was a bit of I don't think so.
15:34
The thing was on ice, as is hockey.
15:37
It's true. Kurt Russell, Was that both in
15:39
the cold area? I think Kurt Russell just likes
15:41
the cold. He's been in two ICE related
15:43
movies. Maybe more.
15:46
I don't know. I don't know his entire entire
15:48
movie. Russell Library of a Movie.
15:50
Secretly a polar bear. Or a Yeti.
15:53
Or you heard it here first, Kurt Russell.
15:56
Is a Yeti with an asteroids and you can follow the rules if you
16:01
want to. So letters and Kurt R similar to
16:06
Yeti. There's a T.
16:10
AK could be a funky little YA funky little.
16:14
OK, no, you're done. R could be a funky little I.
16:18
You're done, you're done. You could be.
16:19
Turn it 90°. It could be a funky little E.
16:24
Cutting it off. But anyway, what I did get to
16:27
watch the Olympics was super fun as always.
16:30
So impressive and I loved it, but the.
16:34
Norway was was. Yeah, I was going to.
16:36
Do oh sorry, medal count I. Was going to do no, go ahead, I
16:39
was going to do a quick medal count.
16:41
Oh no, well I was just going to say Norway was was killing it.
16:45
They were running away with with a lot.
16:46
Of Oh yeah, they were not absolutely killing.
16:48
It as I think they usually do. That's not uncommon, kind of
16:51
like how how in the Summer Olympics it's usually America
16:53
and China are duking it out kind of thing for the top spots.
16:57
It's it's Norway is the is the usually the top dog.
17:00
And I thought they said that this is like the most gold
17:03
medals. United States is one in a while.
17:05
Yeah, it. Yeah, we did great.
17:10
So Norway has 41 total gold. No, I'm sorry.
17:15
Total metals 18 Gold and United States are are in second with 33
17:21
medals in total with 12 Gold, so.
17:24
So, so with that as well, yes. the United States set a new
17:29
record for the most gold medals won in a single Winter Olympics
17:32
at the 2026 Milano Cortina Games, capturing in total of 12
17:37
gold medals. It was They had previously had a
17:41
record of 10 gold medals achieved in the 2002 Salt Lake
17:45
City. And we've never won more than 10
17:48
and we. So when I said 11 to you this
17:50
morning, it's like I think that they broke a record.
17:52
They did with 11, but they. Added one more and it's
17:55
officially over. The Olympics are officially
17:57
over. They ended yesterday.
17:58
Yep, so I'm bummed but what I got to watch I loved and it was
18:03
super fun. One of my favorite things is
18:05
that a lot of people will ask, like, who won the Olympics?
18:08
And it's like it's not. Won the Olympics I don't like.
18:11
That's not a word. Only a question at Google I'm
18:13
like. What?
18:14
Who's? Asking that.
18:15
Yeah, that's hilarious. Now I will say Alyssa, I did get
18:18
to see Alyssa Lou skate for her. I watched her for the medal and
18:23
she, she won. She was from the US won the
18:26
gold. First women to win an individual
18:29
gold since 2002. Good for her.
18:31
Yeah I know and she had stepped away from skating for like 2
18:36
years for like her mental health yeah and then came back and is
18:40
now a gold medal winner. So good for her.
18:43
I'm glad she was able to step away and get the help she needs
18:46
because. Wow, the pressure the I've seen
18:49
got to be tremendous. Yeah.
18:50
I've seen a lot of people compare her to like Simone
18:53
Biles. That would.
18:54
And the big thing is just basically like, you know, these
18:57
women kind of did the sport their way and have like never
19:01
been happier and whatnot. And it's like, there's probably
19:04
a lesson to be learned here of like, we don't have to be like
19:07
killing these girls or men, you know, to to be performing
19:11
because they can perform at a top level and have a good mental
19:14
health. You know what I mean?
19:15
Like, there's no reason that we need to be.
19:17
Absolutely, absolutely. Yeah.
19:19
But I, I know you said you watched her her skate.
19:22
I watched it. I watched a replay of it.
19:25
And at the end she lands her last jump and then there's
19:28
probably about another 30 seconds to go of the thing.
19:31
And she fucking knows that she's done it.
19:33
She knows, she knows that she nailed everything.
19:35
She was just. And she's just.
19:37
So the rest of that skate is she's just all smiles.
19:39
Then she's just a little knee slide thing.
19:41
And she I was like. Oh, she's, she's living.
19:44
She's living it up right now. This I was like.
19:47
What a moment I'm like. And then she's over.
19:51
Did you see her? And she's hugging the the little
19:53
Japanese skater and I say little cuz she really is very.
19:56
Short, yeah, but she's like 20 years.
19:57
Old, but she looks like she's 12 you know a lot of the women the
20:00
partners right the women yes partners especially because
20:03
because you can you got to flip around throws and and whatnot
20:06
exactly and they're hugging and it's just adorable and she's cuz
20:10
she's just balling and so Alyssa goes over there to hug her and.
20:14
And but it was adorable. So just support her and
20:18
everything, which I thought was great.
20:19
There was a moment that I saw from this Olympics that reminded
20:23
me of a moment from the last Summer Olympics, which was so in
20:27
the Summer Olympics in gymnastics, I believe in the
20:30
individuals, it was Italy took gold in bronze.
20:34
And then I believe a girl from China took silver.
20:36
OK, OK. And I don't know if it was like
20:39
a specific event or what it was, but there's at one point a
20:42
podium. So they're up there, They've got
20:44
their medals went on and the and the girls from Italy do the
20:46
thing where they like are buying the medal right from the
20:48
picture. And the girl from China sees
20:51
them doing it. She goes oh and like it's the
20:54
sweetest thing that she wants to turn.
20:55
It up there and it's the. Sweetest thing.
20:58
It's so cute. It's so cute.
20:59
And then and then in this Olympics, there is the figure
21:03
skating moment. You have Alyssa is, is standing
21:06
on the podium in gold. And then I don't know if it was
21:09
Japan, it was 2 Japanese girls. Yeah, Japan was on silver
21:12
Browns. And they hand them all their
21:14
little stuffed animal things. And both the Japanese girls loop
21:18
it through. They put like, because it's like
21:20
2 characters kind of holding hands.
21:22
So they loop 1 character through their metal and then it like
21:24
kind of sits and this Alyssa does the same thing, looks at
21:29
both of them doing this and then she's like she can't figure it
21:32
out how they've done it. So the one girl from Japan goes
21:34
and puts it on hers and whatnot. So and it was just, it's just
21:37
one of those like super sweet, just.
21:38
Really sweet. I loved it.
21:41
I love it. That's that's so.
21:42
Awesome. I have one more, one more podium
21:44
almost moment for you. It is podium moment.
21:46
Yeah, Tell. Me, I think you'll get kick.
21:48
Out So Japan has I'm gonna murder this name and I'm very
21:51
sorry in the pairs figure skating, was it ice dancing or
21:57
actual figure skating? Figure skating the pairs 1 you
22:01
have the Japanese team which the guy his name is Kihara and his
22:09
partner is Riku Riku Miura OK OK I think I did OK there not bad
22:17
we're. Trying bad if anybody knows how
22:18
to pronounce that, don't be mad at us.
22:19
So he does a thing that Instagram and social media has
22:23
now named the Kihara delivery. And I don't know if you know
22:26
what this is. No.
22:28
So they do the podium, right? And then when they get done with
22:31
the podium, he steps down, puts his arm around the girl, just
22:34
kind of lifts her up and then carries her off and carries her
22:37
off to the back. And he does this every single
22:40
time. So he just kind of lifts the
22:42
serpent, carries her. Off and she's tiny.
22:44
Yeah, yeah, right. He does have one arm.
22:45
He's got like the the sub animals in the metal and he's
22:48
got one arm. He's got her skate off.
22:51
And I guess it's like she's she's so short and small that
22:54
she stumbles usually a lot getting down off of the podium.
22:58
So rather than her do that, he just carries her off.
23:00
He just carries her and he's huge and buff.
23:02
So right. I don't know how huge, but he's
23:04
definitely buff. He's very buff.
23:05
So yeah, he's he's doing all right.
23:07
Yeah. So so they call it the Kihara
23:09
delivery and he carries her off the podium.
23:12
I love it. That's awesome.
23:14
It's very, very cute. They walk as far as they can
23:16
till he can get to the ice and oops, cancer to the side.
23:20
Yep, so it's really cute. That's adorable.
23:24
Yep. So.
23:25
So that's the the Kiara. Delivery.
23:26
I love it. I have to tell you that I was
23:29
watching the the women's mono Bob, OK.
23:34
And I don't know if you recognize this lady.
23:36
It's not a very good picture of her.
23:38
Yes. She's been doing the bobsledding
23:40
for a long time. We've seen.
23:42
I've seen her in multiple Olympics now.
23:44
And I was down, down spending the weekend with friends for
23:48
Valentine's Day, which is fun. And she's, you know, she's, like
23:51
I said, been around for a while. So she's not super young.
23:54
Yeah. And so.
23:55
So she's a little bit older, but I think she's 41.
23:58
Yeah. So.
23:59
Which is incredible. I was like, I would not consider
24:01
older old. No, not at all.
24:03
I wish I was still 41. So.
24:04
Yeah one and mom of two and has still is still competing.
24:10
So amazing. I say good on her.
24:13
She has won 3 silver and two bronze in the Olympics, past
24:19
Olympics, OK. And this year she got she got
24:22
the gold. She got the gold.
24:24
What's her name? It is Elena Myers Taylor Hell.
24:28
Yeah. She finally gets the gold.
24:30
You should have seen her. She's crying and her kids are
24:33
there and it's just this. What a moment.
24:37
Amazing. I mean, just incredible.
24:38
Hell yeah. So that was that was a really
24:41
cool, really cool thing. Snoop Dogg is always fun at at
24:47
the Olympic side. Well, he's carrying the torch.
24:49
Imagine the music on and here's Snoo bopping along.
24:51
He's bopping along, shoulder dropping, you know, got the
24:54
beats in the music carrying the torch like the coolest thing
24:58
ever. So that was that was actually
24:59
hilarious. Popping along.
25:01
Well, I also got our sauce. You want to get your sauce
25:03
because I think, Oh yeah, we do need some good transition
25:05
before. OK my the sauce is monkey gland
25:09
sauce. Monkey gland sauce.
25:12
Yeah, woo. Monkey gland sauce is a popular
25:15
South African sweet, tangy and spicy condiment, often compared
25:19
to a BBQ sauce that contains no actual monkey gland.
25:21
OK, thank God for the rest. Easy, Rest easy.
25:25
It's fine. So Speaking of monkeys, yeah, I
25:28
think that's a pretty good transition.
25:29
Speaking of monkeys, I asked you if you knew about Punch the
25:36
Monkey. And I didn't.
25:38
You didn't, and your response to me was.
25:40
Do you know about Slap the Monkey?
25:41
Slap the monkey. And I was like, she didn't I
25:45
know. I know about slap the monkey,
25:46
no? Well, hold on first of all,
25:51
first of all. It's not slap the.
25:53
Monkey. Isn't that what I was meaning to
25:55
say the word? The word I was trying to say was
25:57
spank the monkey, which is also meaning something.
26:02
Stay strong with me. Stay, stay with me, OK?
26:05
Stay strong, stay with me. Spank the monkey was a game you
26:10
could play online. I'm sure it was a game you could
26:13
pull it up. It's all here.
26:14
Like dudes. No, no, look, see.
26:17
This is a hand and then you pull back and you spank it.
26:21
I just spanked that monkey 3. 189 an hour.
26:23
Nice one. You spanked the monkey in 318
26:25
miles. Per hour and that is the whole
26:27
game. That's the whole game.
26:29
That's it. OK, see then it resets and then
26:32
and it used to be you could like you could like it used to, you
26:36
could bring your from underneath and get him in the crotch, which
26:38
is exactly what Spank the Monkey is.
26:40
It doesn't do it anymore. It used to be you could like
26:42
drag your hand off and come over here and then you would come up
26:45
over here, you'd pop it back in and it would be like 1000 miles
26:49
an hour or something like that. This.
26:53
Is this this is the game that we used to play that was really bad
26:57
at 191. We used to play this game in
27:00
like middle school. It was on like the I don't know,
27:02
whatever, like the cool math games or whatever, you know,
27:04
kind of sites. So that's what you said punch
27:07
the monkey. I thought that that's what you
27:09
were talking about. And I here's the thing.
27:11
I saw this online very briefly and I saw all I saw was somebody
27:17
like me about to go Star World War Three in Japan saving punch
27:23
the monkey or something like that.
27:25
Now does this make sense about what you're with your because
27:27
all I was thinking of was the games.
27:29
Thank the monkey and I didn't quite understand.
27:31
And she says, she says slap the monkey and then spank the monkey
27:33
folks. And in my day.
27:35
That was not. Spank the Monkey was a
27:37
completely different. Thing.
27:38
Yeah, I get that. But we're not going to discuss
27:40
what it was. No, the spank.
27:43
The spank. Jesus Christ, Now I got that in
27:45
my head. Punch the Monkey, in case you
27:48
aren't familiar with the Internet's newest adorable
27:50
celebrity, is a baby monkey born in, I can't even say the word,
27:57
Ichakawa. OK city near Tokyo.
28:01
We have chosen a lot of Japanese Japanese names, and I apologize
28:05
for for murdering them. We're sorry they can't all be
28:08
Tama 2. So poor Little Punch.
28:11
It says his name is really poor little Punch.
28:13
And she, poor little Punch's mother rejected him.
28:16
Whoa. Shut the fuck up.
28:17
She rejected him. She stop.
28:20
Is he OK? Punch was luckily saved by zoo
28:22
caretakers. She looked after him and gave
28:23
him a surrogate. The surrogate it's.
28:26
Punched the monkey because I'm about to throw some fucking
28:28
hands. That's.
28:29
Why? I gave him the surrogate, and
28:30
the surrogate was a stuffed monkey.
28:33
It's the most adorable thing. Wait, wait.
28:36
You've seen nothing yet. Look, he's so adorable.
28:41
I'm going to cry. He doesn't have a mother.
28:43
A mother? He's sleeping with his little
28:45
Are you a monkey? In the zoo, this is the cutest
28:48
picture I've ever seen in my life.
28:50
No it's not. It's sad.
28:52
Look at him grooming his mom. His mom, as in stuffed animals.
28:56
Someone's got to go. Oh my God, somebody go over
28:58
there and get him. So he's so sad.
29:04
He's sad because he's not a mother.
29:06
He has no. Family.
29:07
He has no mom. What?
29:08
Do you mean? He's dragging could.
29:11
Somebody get him. OK, good news.
29:15
Yeah, you know what? That guy wasn't a kitten when he
29:17
said I'm going to start world three.
29:19
He goes save. Save Punch.
29:21
Your own wife said she would punch somebody for a punch, so I
29:24
would. So punch was born back in July,
29:27
actually was, but was only introduced to the monkey
29:31
residents at the zoo just this past January.
29:33
OK, OK. Unfortunately the little guy had
29:36
a rough time assimilating with the rest of the troop due to
29:38
factors like differing fur color.
29:41
Oh no, a different distinct smell and delayed vocalization.
29:45
Somebody get him some perfume or something.
29:47
Yeah, so sad. So he's here He is.
29:50
You know, the pictures of him alone with his little plushy
29:53
orangutan mom became went viral, of course.
29:59
And so since we last shared the plight of Punch, things are to
30:05
look up. He's learning his place in the
30:07
social hierarchy and spending more time in the enclosure now
30:12
with the other monkeys. So he's not being like bullied
30:14
or anything anymore. And so the let's see.
30:20
And then it says that a mother has decided to adopt him.
30:28
Oh. Thank God.
30:29
So one of the mom monkeys. Let me show you the picture.
30:33
'Cause let me just a motherfucker.
30:35
What? Look.
30:37
So there's some a Mama and she's holding, just giving them
30:40
sciggle hugs. Exact.
30:41
Same fucking fur color. What do they?
30:43
Even mean I don't know what they're talking about.
30:44
I don't think his fur looks any different either.
30:46
But maybe maybe when he was littler?
30:48
I don't know. It was and now it's grown in and
30:51
now maybe it looks similar. Oh my God.
30:53
I was like, did they give him a bath and that's why he smelled
30:56
clean? Like, I don't know, don't know.
30:58
But good news. I thought you had heard about
31:00
punch. So I didn't know that you didn't
31:02
know you think? That I was man.
31:04
I was. I was just, you know, cooking,
31:07
you know what I mean? I was just going about my merry
31:09
life. Unknown to me, the plight of
31:12
punch is going on, right? And I couldn't even do anything
31:15
about. That world is look at this.
31:18
Oh my God, he's the cutest little tiny thing hugging this
31:21
little orangutan plushie. OK, look at that monkey.
31:23
And people are like. I can't look at this monkey and.
31:25
People are like, we're rooting for you punch and like the whole
31:27
world's like praying for punch the monkey so that.
31:33
He can be taken care of. Yes.
31:35
I'll tell you something. I'm about to come over there
31:37
watching take him home, watching his struggle was breaking the
31:40
hearts around the world. Literally.
31:42
Zookeepers do something, interfere.
31:44
Oh my gosh, the monkeys are talking to you cannot just, you
31:48
can't just turn punch away poor. Little baby, there's no being
31:53
bullied by the other monkeys, but things have turned around
31:57
and he's assimilating better now.
31:59
And a Mama has. No, they're just cyber bullying.
32:02
A Mama is no, no, it's not bullying.
32:04
Everybody loves him. Mama has taken her, taking him
32:07
under her wing, and she's so to say.
32:10
Is he really? Is he really?
32:11
Yeah. Oh my God.
32:12
OK, they got. It so yeah it recently shows one
32:15
of the the the on the new Mama the holding him tight, hugging
32:21
him and like grooming him and. Let me tell you something, if
32:25
that that story hadn't hadn't ended, it was somebody taking
32:28
him in, we would have ended this podcast right here, right now,
32:30
only halfway through because I wouldn't have been able to
32:32
continue. I wouldn't have been able to
32:35
continue. I, I, I thought you maybe had
32:38
heard of it and I didn't know if you'd heard the update.
32:40
So I was actually really I added or I heard the update from Liv
32:43
actually Saturday. Oh, thank God.
32:45
Oh. You know what?
32:46
I don't. We must have.
32:47
We were in the car. Well, well, actually this is a
32:51
good transition to talk about what we did on Saturday.
32:53
This past Saturday we went to the What was the exact title?
32:57
Of the tattoo fest. Well, it was the Saint Louis
33:00
something, Saint Charles something.
33:02
We were over at Saint Charles, so it's called.
33:04
It's called the Saint Louis Tattoo Festival.
33:06
Cool. But it travels all around.
33:08
This tattoo festival does. It's all all different,
33:11
different places and whatnot. Oh, OK, I didn't realize.
33:15
Yeah, that travel around. Well, I know you guys asked me
33:19
last back in January if I wanted to go to this tattoo festival
33:23
and I was like. Sure, why not?
33:25
Let's go check it out. And I'll be honest with you, if
33:29
even if you go and you don't get a tattoo, like I, I didn't
33:35
necessarily go with like I'm absolutely getting a tattoo
33:37
today. You're like, that was it was
33:38
like, if it works out, it works out.
33:39
It's not going to happen organically, right?
33:42
Just walking around. They have tables set up in this
33:45
big Convention Center and, and you have tattoo artists at and
33:49
some, some people just like selling different things.
33:52
And then some people who were actually, you know, tattooing
33:54
went on and you can look at their portfolio or they have a
33:58
binder full of different things that they offer or things and
34:01
pictures of things that they have done and just.
34:03
Looking at their artwork, yeah. Wow, blow my mind.
34:06
It was incredible. These people were all of them,
34:09
every single one of them, so talented.
34:12
And they all had. Most of them had like you could
34:16
get a free sticker at each table.
34:18
I have a sticker who had multiple stickers.
34:20
I have a stack of stickers. How how high would you say those
34:23
are business cards? How would you say this is like
34:26
it's at least an inch thick? Mine that's that's way more than
34:29
an inch thick. I'd say 2 inches.
34:32
I think you're over. A inch and 1/2.
34:34
I'll give you. An inch and a half I I
34:36
absolutely had an inch and a half worth of stickers.
34:38
Oh yeah, I have a giant stack of stickers from every stand like I
34:42
could get one from and some of them is their artworks and has
34:46
their maybe their business name on it.
34:47
Some of them are just fun, but they're incredible.
34:49
They're beautiful, I love it. I'll have to post some of my
34:51
faves so. And so the tattoo fest is is a
34:57
tattoo festival that travels all around the country, right.
35:00
OK, so it. So it makes stops, right?
35:01
Now, February, it was in Saint Louis.
35:03
Oh, I love, I love the whoever, the guy who drew that.
35:07
I'd love it. It's a cardinal bird was the
35:11
kind of. Like a Mardi Gras kind of crown
35:12
and like that. Really fun.
35:15
So very cool. And then the next one to
35:18
Louisville March, and I don't know if you're noticing, it's
35:21
themed after the thing. It seems like he's like city.
35:25
Yes. Like he's the Louisville
35:27
Slugger, Memphis, they've got the pyramid.
35:30
It's not the the bass pro shops pyramid.
35:32
So there's like Egyptian, Egyptian.
35:34
I have no idea about the Toledo. Why?
35:36
What's up with that? I don't know why Milwaukee is
35:39
this dragon looking thing, but they're cool.
35:42
Davenport. I don't know where Davenport is.
35:44
Got a chick on a on a in a boat in a bikini, fully tattooed.
35:49
Saint Paul, it's got like a 2 headed dragon, 2 headed dragon.
35:52
Green Bay has got a cow. But the cheese?
35:55
Fantastic. Yeah.
35:56
Cow in space, this is August is a wizard.
36:00
Grand Wayne. Fort Wayne, That's Texas Grand
36:03
Wayne Convention Center. But yes, Fort Wayne wizard with
36:08
an eye patch. Madison, Madison, Madison way,
36:13
Madison Ted 2 festival. I'm trying to figure out Madison
36:15
way or what what Madison, WI Oh, back to Wisconsin, I assume.
36:19
Oh, they weren't in Wisconsin. Oh no, they were in Green Bay
36:21
and Milwaukee. I am.
36:22
Whoa, OK, a lot of I think it's just around this area, a lot of
36:25
spots in the in in Wisconsin, right.
36:28
And then Grand Rapids, OK, Michigan.
36:31
They're so cool, but the the locals.
36:34
Are all excellent. These are very cool.
36:36
But yeah, now they travel around and you know, they they
36:41
different tattoo artists can go, oops, I've clicked on the wrong
36:44
thing. Different artists can go and and
36:46
visit and I want to click on see, can I click on any of
36:49
these? Nope.
36:50
I can just go fuck myself. Cool.
36:53
OK, well, it was really cool because they had it posted on
36:57
Instagram and then you could see all of the artists that were
37:00
going to be there and and there was a link to like their
37:05
Instagram page. And you then you could look at
37:06
their like portfolio and see their style and whether they
37:09
were like traditional or modern or what.
37:12
Yeah. And so that was very cool
37:14
because Liv and I checked them out before we went and it was
37:16
pretty cool. Yeah.
37:17
So we we had so we had a good time.
37:23
It kicked off. Apparently it kicked off in
37:24
Saint Louis. This was the first weekend it
37:26
was first up so so. In like March 27th or whatever
37:31
is when it will start in, in Louisville and they'll go to
37:35
Memphis and such and such. So I don't know what the the
37:39
closest one is after this, but you know, look it up if you want
37:43
to go. Right, If you want to attend, we
37:45
had a great time from 11:00 in the morning till 10 at night and
37:50
you could walk around and if you liked somebody's say you looked
37:56
at their work and you liked a tattoo that they would they were
37:58
offering. They weren't going to do a lot
38:01
of custom stuff just because, you know, they space is limited
38:03
and they didn't have all of their everything that they have
38:06
to work with. But if you like something and
38:09
they had an available spot, you could get a tattoo that day.
38:12
Absolutely. And so Liv picked out a really
38:17
cute we we, her and I both got a tattoo with the same guy from
38:22
Wisconsin, and she got a little Creature from the Black Lagoon.
38:27
His little face. It's like the American classic
38:29
style. Yeah, it is.
38:31
It's very cute. And now had.
38:32
You or Olivia ever got a tattoo before?
38:34
No 1st tattoo. 1st tattoo, 1st tattoo ever and I've owned one
38:39
for a long time but this is the first one.
38:41
Ashley also got a tattoo. Ashley got one of many tattoos
38:46
she only got 1 she only got one that Jay but her and.
38:49
Olivia both wanted many. They did, and I get it because,
38:51
you know, I'm not the kind of person that will want a lot of
38:53
tattoos on me personally, but I actually get why people do want
38:59
that because just being there and seeing these people's
39:02
artwork really was fascinating. And you can and just seeing how
39:06
absolutely gorgeous it is, I could see why you'd be like, Oh
39:10
my gosh, that's so beautiful. I would love that tattoo, you
39:13
know? And so, but she said, yeah, the
39:15
one, the one lady was like, or you were telling us the story
39:18
about the lady who got like four or five different tattoos today
39:21
or whatever. I also got a tattoo.
39:23
Yeah, we got a tattoo. We all got a tattoo.
39:25
We. All got tattoos.
39:26
We'll post pictures. We'll post pictures so so.
39:29
Yeah, Ashley got started and her tattoo took like a couple of
39:31
hours and Liv's Liv got color in hers.
39:35
So hers took a little bit longer than mine, but not not as long
39:40
as 30 minutes. I think maybe a little longer,
39:42
but not much longer than that. And then mine was also about
39:46
also about 30 minutes. No, I thought if I thought that
39:51
yours was going to take longer. So that's why me and Olivia walk
39:56
out to the car and I was like, OK, we got time to run to the
39:59
Taco Bell. You did.
40:01
That is 6 months. No, no, no, we didn't. 6 minutes
40:03
away and come back. So I was like 6 minutes there, 6
40:05
minutes back. It's 12 minutes we spent.
40:07
It was super quick in the drive through, like maybe two or three
40:10
minutes. The whole thing was maybe 15
40:12
minutes. And then you're like, Oh yeah,
40:14
I'm done. By the time we got back, there
40:15
you were. I sitting down already done over
40:17
over in the lobby. I felt, I thought it took about
40:19
30 minutes, but I guess I could see maybe it was more like 20 or
40:22
so. I guess that would make Yeah,
40:24
Well, I mean, I think he think that was trying to go very fast.
40:28
Yes. I think yours took less time
40:29
because I was insane for that. Yes, because I just.
40:33
Listener, I chose to put mine on the top of my foot and so she's
40:38
insane. I was insane.
40:39
They kept trying to talk me out of it.
40:41
She's the toughest of all of us. I'm, you know, we're all going
40:43
to Weenie Hutt juniors and she gets to go, She gets.
40:48
To go, we're all. The I get.
40:49
To go to the big boy. Yeah, I, that's where I wanted
40:54
to. I wanted to Black Rose because
40:55
my favorite band is Rose, The fandom name is Black Rose.
40:58
And I wanted to, I wanted the Black Rose.
40:59
And he had one that I thought would be pretty perfect,
41:02
honestly. And it was he he, he put it
41:07
exactly where I wanted it. He tried to go really fast
41:09
because he knew he's, I love how he said certain parts that are
41:13
going to be a little bit spicier than others.
41:15
I was like, oh, OK, we just we're describing it as spicy.
41:18
OK, all right, I get it. And he was right.
41:22
Some parts were like, that's fine, no worries.
41:26
Yeah. And then other parts were like,
41:27
Oh my fucking God, Why? Why did I do this to myself?
41:31
I am. I did.
41:32
I texted you at that point. Why would I sign up for this?
41:34
This is. Insane.
41:35
Why did I do this? This hurt.
41:36
We're like literally much. Literally all of us were like,
41:39
Are you sure? Are you going to the top of the
41:41
foot by the way you get to go to the salty spittoon?
41:43
That's the oh I get. To go to the salty spittoon.
41:46
In in spud. How tough?
41:47
Are you it's on the toughest, OK.
41:49
Nails for breakfast. Nails are about any milk.
41:52
Right the way, Right this way, Sir.
41:55
That's the one he's doing that he's doing.
41:57
He's retending you the tattoo. You're right.
41:58
You're right. Yeah, I'm excited.
42:00
I get to go, you get. To the Salty's platoon because
42:02
you got the the foot tattoo and the rest.
42:04
Of us did not do that. I think it turned out really
42:05
good. I like it a lot.
42:07
Yeah, you. Everybody kept trying to talk me
42:09
out of it. And then I looked at the guy.
42:11
Actually, I looked at the guy and I said, Are you sure you
42:12
want to tattoo this on my foot? I've been walking around all
42:14
day. My foot's probably going to be
42:15
stinky and he's like, no, it's going to be fine.
42:18
I took my shoe, my sock off and I rubbed my whole foot with hand
42:21
sanitizer. My foot would smell like you're
42:24
literally strawberry pound cake. You're literally fine.
42:28
So he said yeah, he said it was fine.
42:29
It smelled like strawberry. I was like, OK, thank God for
42:31
hand San, right? So it probably.
42:33
Didn't smell bad. I'm sure it smelled like a
42:36
stinky foot. I'm sure, I'm sure walking
42:38
around all day. But yeah, Ash Liv got done 1st
42:43
and Ash got done a little bit after that.
42:47
Actually I went then. Then Ash got done.
42:49
That dress, because Ash was ashes was very detailed.
42:52
Yeah, she got and very cool she has.
42:54
Some gay vampires. On the on her forearm, right?
42:57
Yeah, her right. On her right forearm, yeah.
42:59
And so it kind of her where like imagine your palm up and it's on
43:03
that part and it looks very cool.
43:05
She says gay as hell and I love it.
43:07
So that's awesome. And then?
43:08
Well, she had that. The artist had, she didn't get
43:11
this, obviously she didn't get this one, but she had Art of
43:14
Chapel Rome when she was wearing the Joan of Arc outfit, if you
43:17
know what that yeah, looks like. So Ashley goes, I know she's
43:20
have some gay stuff is what she said.
43:22
She goes and she did. She liked it was like a vampire
43:25
and a vampire hunter. I've looked more closely.
43:27
Oh, OK. We were wondering.
43:28
We were trying to. I was trying to figure it out
43:29
because the one had a sword and was like, yes, that's the
43:31
vampire hunter. The other girl had teeth.
43:34
Thanks. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.
43:35
OK. So, well, it turned out really
43:36
good, we'll post pics of them and then we were actually fixing
43:39
to leave and Abby's like, well, I can't just go now without
43:42
getting one too. So originally I was, I was going
43:45
to leave. I was like, it's fine, it's not
43:46
a big deal. And then the, the girl who did
43:49
Ashley's tattoo had said, like, there's a competition and I, we
43:55
can enter, you know, the, the tattoo into, into the
43:58
competition, but you have to stay here until then.
44:01
And at first we thought that the competition was like 8830.
44:04
And so I was like, OK, well, like it was, what do you think?
44:08
6, maybe 5:30. Actually it was about, I thought
44:12
it was like 630 going on 7. At that point I was like, well,
44:15
if. You know, we're sticking around
44:16
anyway. Maybe I'll, I'll, maybe I'll get
44:18
a tattoo. I'll get, you'll get meant to
44:20
me, right. So we're walking around and then
44:22
we find out, oh, just kidding. The, the competition is not
44:26
going to be till 9:30 tonight. And because it because it ends
44:28
at 10. So that's probably when they'll
44:30
announce the winners, right? So we're not going to get out of
44:31
here till 10. So we're not going to get home
44:33
until like 11. And I'm like, it's too long of a
44:36
day. But by that point I'd already
44:37
committed to getting a tattoo. So then they weren't going to,
44:39
they weren't willing to let me leave.
44:41
With that one, it's true. We were like, you got to get
44:43
one. We all got. 1 So I was looking
44:44
around, I was looking around and I like, was thinking about doing
44:50
some Godzilla. Yeah, something Taylor Swift.
44:53
We definitely still want to do something to Godzilla, because
44:55
you're gonna do Godzilla and I gotta get a Mothra attention.
44:57
Yes, I need a tramp stamp and Mothra.
44:58
I think that would be a fucking. I think that I'll get a tramp
45:00
stamp with Godzilla. And then what was the third
45:05
thing I said? Taylor Swift?
45:06
Godzilla. What did you?
45:07
What was? It there was a third thing that
45:09
I was like, I could do that. I'm blanking.
45:12
I don't know. I made a list in my phone so I
45:14
know for me, no, for me, Jesus, I was like, I made my own list
45:17
so I knew what I wanted to look for.
45:19
Well, I couldn't remember what the last thing was, but I took
45:22
the black Rose off because I got a black.
45:23
Rose Well, there you go. Yeah.
45:25
OK, so it doesn't matter. You were you were.
45:28
We were looking at different ideas.
45:29
Yep. And then I saw I kept seeing, I
45:31
kept seeing these little like illustrations of cats and
45:33
whatnot. And I was like, that's right,
45:36
Ashley. And I had talked about this
45:37
before and I was like, yeah, I think actually if I were to get
45:40
one, I could get like a little a little meatball with like cat
45:42
ears or something like that for my little.
45:44
Sansa and so I listener, I did not get a meatball tattoo, but I
45:48
did get a fat little cat tattoo. And so we did.
45:50
So we start, we wandered around until we found one in a so cute.
45:53
She's got a she's got a it's called second skin, a clear
45:56
piece of yeah, second skin on top of it to keep it clean.
45:59
And yeah. And when that where as Liv and I
46:01
didn't get that. And you guys just, yeah, had a
46:03
wrap. Kind of, yeah.
46:04
He wrapped up in and then we. Wash it and put the little
46:06
Aquaphor on it. Yeah every three times a day
46:09
yeah. So I after a week I can take
46:11
this off cuz mine looks really good and I can take it off.
46:14
I can take it off early, but I the longer I leave it on then I
46:18
don't have to like wash it and all that as much.
46:21
So antibacterial. So oh look at you.
46:24
Wow. Yeah, see, it looks it's healed
46:25
up really nice. It's really nice.
46:27
It looks really good. Yeah, yeah.
46:29
And they look great. I mean he.
46:30
Doesn't doesn't hurt. No, mine's like a little tender,
46:34
but barely at all. If I would press on it if I were
46:37
to stomp your. Foot right now.
46:38
I would. It would hurt a lot.
46:39
Well, that would hurt, period. But yeah, it would hurt a lot.
46:42
But I have been able to put a shoe on and walk around.
46:44
I have no pain. I'm not in any pain whatsoever,
46:46
right? Yeah, no, I'm totally fine.
46:48
Issues. I've got one on you know, so
46:49
mine's on my. Forearm.
46:50
My left forearm, my little chubby cat.
46:53
New Little. Stretch.
46:54
We'll post pics. It's adorable.
46:56
It turned out great. You were done in like 10-15
46:59
minutes. Yes, sure.
47:00
And then I was talking to the guy.
47:01
I was talking to the guy guy and and guy that got trapped in a
47:04
conversation. Super nice guy there from
47:06
Chicago, but I sat there for probably 2530 minutes just
47:10
talking to him and I and I texted Ashley to come in and get
47:13
me because I didn't know how to end the conversation right.
47:17
Right. And I was like.
47:18
They're waiting for me so we can go home.
47:21
She's gonna get a tattoo. We'll go get dinner because we
47:23
hadn't had to. Ash and I hadn't had dinner yet.
47:25
Now I will say being a newbie to the tattoo world, we walked over
47:29
and Ash was mid tattoo yes and the girl was working on doing
47:36
the tattoo and Ash was like I'm going to be here.
47:39
Well and I'm like no worries. I said well it looks like you're
47:43
almost done already. And then, of course, I realized,
47:48
you know, that's that's the stencil.
47:49
Yeah. And so I was like, Mom.
47:51
That's just a stencil and and. The tattoo artist, you know,
47:55
obviously picked up on the fact that I had no idea what I was.
47:58
Talking about and they got a, they got a pretty.
47:59
Big laugh, but so hard and I I can't even be mad about it
48:02
because they they did, they got they got the biggest kick out of
48:05
it. Yeah, but not in a not in a
48:06
negative way. No, not at.
48:08
All they thought it was like a very.
48:09
They literally, they literally thought it was adorable.
48:12
They were like, you're adorable. That's the stencil.
48:15
I was like, I am a new beat to this tattoo world.
48:18
And so it was so funny that I couldn't.
48:21
I wasn't even embarrassed. It was just so funny.
48:22
It was just too funny. And I was like, duh, you're
48:25
right. I can see now that it's like
48:26
purpley. It looks like it is.
48:27
It's like blue, yeah. So, But I will tell you the
48:31
coolest thing when Liv was getting her, getting her tattoo,
48:34
he goes up, He's like, I'll be right back.
48:35
I'm going to go make the stencil.
48:37
Yeah. And I'm like, well, I wonder why
48:40
would they make it out? Because they press it on your
48:41
arm and it leaves the impression and they peel it off.
48:43
And then they know where to tattoo and what to tattoo.
48:46
And he comes back and he has a piece of this is before your
48:50
time in school. But the mimeograph paper, which
48:55
I used to use as a teacher years ago when I first started
49:00
teaching. And it's the purple you make.
49:04
You make, you literally press on this purple paper and it leaves
49:09
this imprint of this purple color and then you put it on
49:13
this machine and it literally spit.
49:15
You spin, you set up how many you want and it spins and it
49:18
presses on to the paper and makes your worksheet.
49:22
You know, whatever it is you're trying to make and.
49:25
And that's what the dangers are. And that's what they're using to
49:28
make these. That's funny.
49:29
Not everybody. You're you.
49:31
The person who did your tattoo didn't use that.
49:33
I saw them print it out on something.
49:36
But he's like, yeah, people. Are no they did.
49:37
They did print, they did print an image and then so they he had
49:43
that sitting next to like it actually like printed.
49:44
So I don't know if he had like 2 separate, like he made it there.
49:47
Yeah, but he did not have the old mimeograph machine.
49:49
Yeah, so the, and I wonder if it was different because I just
49:54
have like an outline. Mine's just an outline and you
49:56
got shading and Olivia got color and all that.
49:58
So I wonder if I think there's just, there's got to be
50:00
different ways to make a style. But it literally, this is what a
50:05
mimograph machine looks like. And it spins and then it presses
50:08
on the paper and it shoots the printed copy out.
50:10
That's so funny. And this is what I had to use.
50:13
These are old. They're very.
50:15
Old. They don't make them anymore.
50:16
Well, no. I mean they they ran out of
50:18
dinosaurs. It's literally it.
50:20
And it was in this, I mean, people my age will know what
50:22
this is because this is what we, this is what the worksheets were
50:24
made out of. And the ink looked purple
50:27
because it was. I'm trying to find the oh, you'd
50:31
have it all over your hands, you know, because it would rub off
50:33
all over you when you were making.
50:35
I've done. Let me tell you something I've
50:36
done ink. It's like a it's like stamp type
50:40
art kind of thing I did for when I was in college.
50:42
That's like you have this like I don't even know what the
50:45
material is, but it's just like a sheet of like almost like a
50:48
cork kind of like material, but it's it's not cork, but
50:52
basically you draw out whatever your picture is, right?
50:55
And so I just like a little snake.
50:56
I drew out this little snake and whatnot, and then I, you take
51:02
your carving knives and you've carve the whole thing out.
51:06
And I did slice my finger open, not majorly, but I did, I cut it
51:09
a little bit, but they're like, yeah, there's always one.
51:12
I'm like, damn it, I'm the one. I thought I was the first.
51:15
Now, admittedly, another girl also cut her finger, but she had
51:17
to go to the ER, She cut it way worse than I did.
51:20
So I was like, mine was fine. We wrapped it up and I was fine.
51:24
Little split finger still got it but you you carve out the like
51:29
stamp and all this kind of stuff right you like you you cover
51:33
reverse what you want the image to look like and and such and
51:36
then you take your like ink roller you get this like they
51:40
like roll it in ink and they roll it on this like almost like
51:44
a acrylic kind of sheet until it's like really then you can go
51:48
here like that you know what I mean like if you had a paint
51:51
roller that. Was mostly dry.
51:53
It's making that kind of sound and then they roll it over your,
51:57
they roll it over your like image and then you got to center
52:01
it up on the thing and they have like a different, you know, like
52:04
a, you know, rolling pin kind of thing.
52:06
Like, and you flatten it out across your sheet and, and you
52:10
do like a like I we did like 4. She had four of the same piece
52:15
kind of thing, but that the ink aspect of it got everywhere,
52:23
like, and, and then we had the ink drawing, you know, my, my
52:28
Deadpool thing that's still at home.
52:31
I I still have that. I should, I will post a picture.
52:33
Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure. But we had to do that with like
52:35
a, a bottle of ink and like a like, not a quill, but what do
52:41
you call it? Like not a ballpoint pen.
52:44
Help me. There's one in the middle.
52:46
It's not a quill. It's not a ballpoint pen.
52:50
Fountain pen. Yep, fountain pen.
52:51
Fountain pen, more or less, I think, or calligraphy tools kind
52:55
of thing. They had to dip in the ink and
52:58
you had to like draw it. So that's what I drew that one
53:00
with entirely. It was like that.
53:02
And that was like a nightmare again, because ink everywhere
53:10
like I like it. Were you just?
53:13
Covered in it. They're either I don't like, I
53:16
don't even know how to explain it.
53:18
No matter how you did stuff like it, just like I had like my
53:23
little ink and I had like a, a bunch of napkins around it so
53:26
that when I pulled it out, I would try to like, you know, dab
53:29
it off and undoubtedly it would drip and like, and I'm trying
53:32
not to let it drip on my thing because I'm not allowed to use
53:34
like paint, like white paint or anything to cover up any fuck
53:38
ups. And so I had like one thing I
53:40
was like fucking pissed off about because I, they were like,
53:43
no, you can't go over it. I'm like, how would you go fuck
53:44
yourself? But whatever.
53:46
So I did OK. But yeah, no, it was just like,
53:49
it was like you would be like drawing in your little, like a
53:51
little tongue and things would kind of get caught and then
53:54
they'd like flick and then ink everywhere.
53:58
I was like, this sucks an ink and an ink is not like your your
54:02
craft Crayola paint. You know what I mean?
54:06
Ink, it doesn't matter. It's whatever it's on, you're
54:08
done. It's saying that's it.
54:09
It's not going to that's it. No, never.
54:13
I fucking hated that shit. That's hilarious.
54:15
I will, I will tell you, it just blew my mind because the minute
54:18
I saw the paper, the paper that you would use for this is like,
54:24
I'm not even, I can't even think of the.
54:25
Proper word for it, but you had it's like several layers, right?
54:30
And so you would the top layer, it's covered by a thin, thin
54:35
sheet, almost like vellum. And you would write on there or
54:37
you would roll it in and type, you could type.
54:39
A lot of people would type on it and then you'd run it through
54:41
the, they call it like a typewriter, if you will.
54:43
Yeah, with a typewriter, right. Yeah, I need to clarify.
54:46
Sometimes we have like Olivia or Gilbert.
54:48
Like you could draw on there, write on it, type on it,
54:50
whatever and make up. Like I said, all kinds of you
54:53
could put math problems and then that way you would run off of,
54:56
you know, 20 worksheets, whatever for your classroom, but
54:59
they call it like, and you'll have to write them all them
55:00
Ditto machines because again, you're making, you know, a Ditto
55:04
copy. And the ink had the specific
55:07
smell. And I can remember the teacher
55:09
would pass out the papers freshly run off and the whole
55:13
class would be like and sniff their paper.
55:15
I'd never liked the smell, but some people really like the.
55:18
Smell like this? Ink and I really didn't care for
55:20
it but yeah. And so you then you peel this
55:24
layer up and you have made this stencil, I guess, and and then
55:29
you put that onto the machine and that presses on, you know,
55:33
your paper and gets you your your copies.
55:36
And he comes over and he's got this piece of this paper with
55:40
the layers and the price see the purple and I'm like, Oh my God,
55:43
did you use that? Maybe I'll grab paper.
55:45
And he's like, yeah, yeah, that's how we make our stencils.
55:47
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
55:49
He's like, yeah, people are. It just took me back immediately
55:51
to like, the 1990s with the end of these machines.
55:56
I got in to teaching that the end of their lives was shortly
56:00
thereafter. We now have computers and Xerox
56:04
printers and all these things that you're not using these
56:07
machines anymore. Sure.
56:08
So they're. They don't make them anymore.
56:10
Yeah. And he's like, yeah, people in
56:12
the tattoo world are looking for these machines.
56:14
If you can find one, you know, you're so happy because they
56:19
don't make the parts anymore that you can't fix them if they
56:21
break, You know, it's just like, they're just not in production.
56:25
And I was like, are you kidding with me?
56:27
Seriously, you guys, they're using these.
56:29
I was. It just blew me away.
56:30
I was. So I was just like, I couldn't
56:32
believe it. Because I'm like, I assume
56:34
there's a big graveyard somewhere full of mimeograph
56:36
machines, you know, because no one is going to use these.
56:39
And that paper is so specific, but that it just it boy, did it
56:45
just take me back. I was like, what, what?
56:47
I couldn't believe it. And so that was that was pretty
56:50
awesome actually, because I didn't never never in a million
56:53
years expected that that's how he was going to transfer that.
56:56
No, no, no, that stencil onto her.
56:58
I know or me. So that was that was crazy cool.
57:01
Yeah, I mean, that's the so I did do a quick Google.
57:05
That's like the old school, that's the traditional is to do
57:07
the mimeograph. Right.
57:08
But they were still doing it there.
57:10
Some people are still doing it and they were still had it at
57:12
the festival. But they said so this is like
57:15
common alternatives include you could hand trace designs onto a
57:18
hectograph. What a hectograph is transfer
57:21
paper using like a ballpoint pen or using speed stick deodorant
57:24
as a transfer agent. Oh interesting.
57:26
Or employing a digital stencil printers and whatnot so you can.
57:30
I think your guy had a digital. I think a lot of them do.
57:33
Yeah, they do. I don't know, but some of them
57:36
are still using the old mimographs.
57:38
And I was like, and they had one there and I was like, they had
57:40
the stencil paper there. And I was like, what?
57:41
Yeah. Ashley, did your, did your girl
57:43
use a mimeograph or did she do a regular printed off?
57:47
I think she printed off. I see she printed hers off.
57:50
But he seemed like he used to do the American traditional style.
57:53
And it's funny, he was doing like the old because this is
57:54
like a digital printer, but she still printed it on that old
57:57
school paper. The oh, look, there was the
57:59
yeah, there was the speed stick. But yeah, is.
58:02
She about to give herself a tattoo.
58:04
She was transferring the design onto her She.
58:06
But yeah, he put some kind out. He put some kind of like it
58:10
looked kind of brownish and smeared it on and then put the
58:14
stencil in there. I did as well.
58:15
Yeah. And then it was there, there it
58:17
was. So he knew where to where to
58:20
tattoo. So yeah, yeah, No, same here.
58:23
They, I, you get whatever. I don't know what it is.
58:25
Ashley, do you know what the stuff is they put down before
58:27
they put down the thing? She doesn't know what it's
58:29
called either. So I was like, it's kind of
58:30
brownish, but then it doesn't look brownish.
58:32
So when it's. On your stand, no.
58:34
But yeah, but anyway, we had a great day.
58:37
It was a lot of fun it. Was fun we like I said, we all
58:39
got tattoos. I think everybody's looks great
58:41
and 10 out of 10 would go again. I got AI got a quick thing I got
58:44
to tell you about because I told you I mentioned the Diet Coke
58:46
thing, so now I got to. Oh, you got to say it.
58:48
You're right. You're right.
58:49
You're right. OK.
58:49
So I don't know if you've heard of this.
58:51
Do you know what the Gen. Z is calling diet cokes?
58:55
No Fridge cigs What? Fridge, Fridge cigarettes,
59:00
Fridge cigs what? What?
59:01
Why that's so terrible? The Gen.
59:05
Z's are calling them. Oh, I got to show you a picture
59:08
of a listener, Erica. Well, it that makes me think of,
59:11
I just saw a Parks and Recs, Parks and Rec episode where
59:15
Leslie Knope's going to go on her first date with the police
59:18
officer. I forget his name.
59:20
Who cares? And she's so nervous that she's
59:23
like, I got to go. I got to go.
59:24
I got to go to the Wiz Palace. She can't.
59:28
She's like, it's a bathroom. I know what it is.
59:30
Are you proud of me? This is she has me a fridge and
59:36
it looks like it looks like a pack of cigarettes, but.
59:39
It's full of Diet Coke. Cans and yeah, no, she tells me.
59:43
She tells me that yeah, apparently that she tells you
59:46
this listener, Erica. Oh, sorry, sorry.
59:48
That apparently Gen. Z calls Diet Coke a fridge sig.
59:51
I've never heard of that. I said I did not know that.
59:53
That's why. And she was, I feel better
59:55
knowing I wasn't behind the times so much.
59:58
And I was like, but then she says, and also why does it
1:00:02
actually feel like a fridge sig? It's so accurate.
1:00:05
With the sad face and I said because it tastes bad and you're
1:00:08
addicted. Question mark.
1:00:10
Legit because of the artificial sweetener in there.
1:00:13
You get addicted to it. Yeah, but why are you going to
1:00:16
say it like that? And I said just a little
1:00:20
something. Take the edge off and hit the
1:00:21
dike. That's awesome.
1:00:26
And then finally I said crack it up in a cool one with the boys
1:00:28
and it's just listener Erica drinking a diet copitoff.
1:00:31
That's awesome. Oh man.
1:00:33
OK, so that's a girl's name for a Diet Coke.
1:00:36
Not a fan. I didn't.
1:00:38
It's not my generation. It's a generous blame Olivia.
1:00:41
Olivia probably said that for sure she would stick her head.
1:00:45
No, pretty emphatically like the naysayers.
1:00:47
I've chosen to eliminate all those who oppose me as opposed
1:00:51
to doing better research. That is the way God intended as
1:00:55
he eliminated everyone that wasn't Noah and those animals
1:00:58
that one time. So don't come for me, he said.
1:01:02
Oh, everybody's against me. They'll start over.
1:01:05
Okay. That's my fault all.
1:01:08
Right, my fault. All right, well, I don't know
1:01:10
about you, but after this, I'm gonna need some serious beef.
1:01:13
And. Some serious fridge cigs.
1:01:16
No bye. Bye teach your kids how to play
1:01:19
my call.