Latest / Privycast / Ep. 62 Keep Pooping in the Free World with Sam Baggenstos (Privychat 8)

Transcript

Ep. 62 Keep Pooping in the Free World with Sam Baggenstos (Privychat 8) · Privycast

0:00
>> Speaker A: And it's dark in the room, and I fumble over to
0:03
the lamp, and I turn on the lamp, and there's, like, this
0:06
brown sticky log. And
0:09
I've been lying next to it for, like, 45
0:12
minutes listening to chance the rapper
0:15
while there's this log next to me.
0:17
And I've already grabbed it. So I'm like, oh, I pick
0:20
it up and I sniff it.
0:28
>> Speaker B: Welcome back to privy. Privy is
0:31
a podcast about bathrooms
0:34
recorded from my home
0:36
bathroom. Uh, and this week,
0:39
um, through the power of the Internet, I'm getting ready
0:42
to have a friend join me here,
0:45
uh, remotely, but I'll let him tell you
0:48
more about that. Uh, and so I
0:50
apologize now for any technical difficulty gremlins that
0:53
we have. Uh, but we're going to roll with this and see what we
0:56
get. So, uh, yeah, we'll see if we can
0:59
get him in here. Hello?
1:02
Sam? Yo, can you hear
1:05
me? I'm sorry I don't
1:07
have video because my laptop is still
1:10
the one that I was using when you and I were at corbin.
1:13
>> Speaker A: So.
1:16
>> Speaker B: It'S a fun thing. I have a little sticky note over it
1:19
because I'm what my friends call paranoid.
1:22
And, uh, I took it off, and then I
1:25
turned zoom on, and it was like, hey, you don't have a webcam,
1:28
bud. Uh, so I'm
1:31
sorry.
1:33
Yeah, no worries.
1:36
>> Speaker A: You want me to turn mine off? Stare at me the whole
1:38
time?
1:39
>> Speaker B: It's totally up to you. I'm good with
1:42
whatever, man. It's just good to hear you and see you,
1:45
dude. How are you?
1:47
>> Speaker A: I'm good. Yeah, I'm in Arizona now,
1:50
just living life. Fun.
1:53
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Um,
1:55
so I did a little bit of an intro
1:58
before you hopped on here, but, um, I can just
2:01
kind of. And you can fill in the gaps because I'm sure I
2:04
have some things totally messed up.
2:07
But
2:11
my introduction to who you are was,
2:14
um. I want to say his name was Jesse. Is that
2:17
right?
2:18
>> Speaker A: Um, Jesse Hauser?
2:20
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
2:20
>> Speaker A: Uh, maybe I shouldn't have said his last name. Ah, no, you're good.
2:23
Okay.
2:24
>> Speaker B: Yeah, we're beyond the point of.
2:26
Yeah, okay.
2:28
>> Speaker A: Yeah.
2:29
>> Speaker B: So you guys were roommates, right?
2:31
>> Speaker A: Oh, yeah, freshman year.
2:35
We're the same year. Right? Let me just get this right.
2:38
We're the same year.
2:39
>> Speaker B: Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Yeah. And I
2:42
just know Jesse would come down the hallway,
2:45
and, um, he was a very
2:48
interesting guy. He was super cool. You know, you would
2:51
just sometimes be there, just, like, kind
2:53
of nodding and, like, yeah, I don't know. Uh, and that was kind
2:56
of my introduction to
2:58
Bagenstas.
3:00
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I was pretty quiet freshman year. I imagine
3:03
that's kind of the vibe I gave off.
3:07
>> Speaker B: Hey, I feel like we were all just kind of
3:10
keeping our heads above water in our
3:13
way.
3:14
>> Speaker A: Well, you seemed a little bit louder.
3:16
>> Speaker B: Yeah, um, I've always
3:19
been. What? Yeah, a little louder
3:22
is a good way to say it. I think that's why I went
3:25
into ministry with teenagers, because it's just like,
3:28
you just got to shout over them sometimes. Um.
3:30
>> Speaker A: You're still doing that?
3:32
>> Speaker B: Yeah, they can't get rid of me yet.
3:36
Um.
3:39
>> Speaker A: Um.
3:41
>> Speaker B: Feel free to even share because this might even need new
3:44
information for me. But where did you grow up? And
3:48
just hit me with whatever information you want
3:50
to share with myself and other
3:53
people who, like.
3:58
>> Speaker A: I'm. You like bathrooms? That's great.
4:00
Uh, I'm from Renton, Washington.
4:03
That's where I grew up.
4:05
>> Speaker B: Where is Renton?
4:07
>> Speaker A: Renton is south of Seattle. Like
4:10
an hour or 45 minutes south of
4:12
Seattle.
4:13
>> Speaker B: Okay.
4:14
>> Speaker A: Actually, not in Renton, an
4:16
unincorporated King county, but
4:19
close to Renton. I had three older
4:22
siblings until I was nine, and
4:25
then my younger brother was born. Um, so there's five
4:28
of us. Well, uh,
4:31
lots of going to the bathroom at my own
4:34
house because we were home schooled
4:37
and so didn't go to the bathroom in a
4:40
school until I taught high school.
4:43
I was a teacher for a bit. I don't know. I liked
4:45
camping, growing up, lots of hiking,
4:48
outdoorsy stuff. Uh, me and my
4:51
brothers had a juggling and unicycling act we would
4:54
do when I was younger. We were really into
4:56
that.
4:57
>> Speaker B: Wow.
4:58
>> Speaker A: And then went to school at
5:01
Corbin University where we met, which is
5:03
great. And then never really
5:06
looked back. Stayed in Salem for ten years.
5:08
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Wow. So you mentioned.
5:11
Dang, man. Um, so you mentioned
5:13
that you're in Arizona now. How
5:16
long have you been over there?
5:17
>> Speaker A: Uh, like two and a half months. It hasn't been very long.
5:20
Oh.
5:21
>> Speaker B: Whoa. Oh. I was just going to say,
5:25
do you have family there? Because I'm just trying
5:28
to, like. Yeah. What took you over to
5:31
Arizona? And you can even share what you're doing over.
5:35
>> Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. So I went
5:38
to Corbin for english, but
5:40
didn't really know what I want to do with it. As is
5:43
the. I don't know. A lot of college students are that
5:46
way. You study what you're interested in, but they don't
5:49
necessarily have a plan. And then I worked as a
5:52
custodian for a.
5:54
Yes, yes. I was at Corbin
5:57
as a custodian. Ah. Well, before
6:00
that was AAC. I was in student life, just
6:03
doing student life stuff. But then I, uh,
6:06
realized I want to do that, and I was custodian. And
6:09
then you remember
6:12
Sarah bracken?
6:14
>> Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
6:15
>> Speaker A: She worked at, ah, turner, uh,
6:19
elementary.
6:20
>> Speaker B: Okay.
6:20
>> Speaker A: And there was a position open to work with special needs
6:23
kids, and she's like, you should apply.
6:26
So I applied, and I actually ended
6:29
up working there for four years.
6:30
>> Speaker B: Dude, no way.
6:31
>> Speaker A: Four years.
6:32
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
6:32
>> Speaker A: And then I went back to school, got my
6:35
master's, got my teaching
6:38
credentials in secondary
6:41
education. So high school student taught
6:43
there, uh, at, uh, Cascade high school in that same school
6:46
district, but realized I didn't like working
6:49
with high school kids, so I stopped
6:52
that real quick, went back to
6:55
elementary school and was basically a full time
6:58
sub there this last school year.
7:01
But, uh, along the way, realized I didn't like teaching
7:04
really at all, even though I love kids and
7:06
I'm pretty good with younger kids. Not as good with high school
7:09
kids, but younger kids. And I love being around them and
7:12
they like being around me. But realized I didn't want to
7:15
teach. And I
7:18
was always curious about
7:19
outdoor work, like
7:22
conservation type stuff, trail work,
7:25
that sort of thing. But
7:28
I went to four years of school, an english
7:31
degree, and then I put all this time to get a master's degree.
7:34
Yeah, it's easy to get in a state of mind. We're like, why?
7:37
It's kind of too late now. I invested all this time
7:40
and money, but eventually I was like, screw it. I just
7:43
want to try a different sort of.
7:46
And so I applied to a bunch of different
7:48
conservation type things, like bird
7:51
counts in eastern Oregon and trail
7:54
work in Montana. And I just
7:57
kept on branching out more and more, kept on
8:00
getting rejected by these different places.
8:02
>> Speaker B: Wow.
8:03
>> Speaker A: And, uh, nonprofit hired
8:06
me here, and we
8:08
do trail work and conservation work all
8:11
around the state of Arizona, mainly just trails,
8:14
honestly. So I'm in a trail crew, and that's how
8:17
I came out here. But I actually live with, uh,
8:19
riffle. Remember Richard?
8:21
>> Speaker B: Oh, yeah, yeah.
8:23
>> Speaker A: Him and I are roommates.
8:25
>> Speaker B: No way, dude. Okay. So
8:28
I worked with, um,
8:32
was shoot. Uh,
8:35
he would have known it as, like, christian community placement
8:38
center, but it's different name now.
8:41
But, yeah, he and I worked together there as mentors
8:44
for so. And I know
8:47
he went to Corbin, I think. Um,
8:49
but I never knew him at Corbin. I
8:52
knew him from work. Uh.
8:54
>> Speaker A: Oh, that's funny. Like, while you were at Corbin or
8:57
after?
8:57
>> Speaker B: Um, it was while I was at Corbin, but
9:00
he's a bit older, I think, maybe.
9:03
>> Speaker A: Yeah. Ah, he's like, early 30s yeah.
9:05
>> Speaker B: So I think he was, like, finishing up or had already
9:08
finished up and was living in the area
9:11
when we were there, I think.
9:13
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I didn't really know him. I think I played
9:16
some frisbee with him at school.
9:18
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
9:19
>> Speaker A: And then I was going through some big life changes a
9:22
couple years after graduating, and so I needed a place to
9:24
live then, so I actually lived in a house with
9:27
him in Salem along with some other people that
9:30
are connected to Corbin or just friends of
9:33
people.
9:34
>> Speaker B: Wow.
9:34
>> Speaker A: And then he moved to Tucson to live with his brother. His
9:37
twin brother Ryan lives.
9:40
And then I randomly got a job
9:43
in Tucson and I texted him. I'm like, hey, can
9:46
I stay at your place for a little bit? Hoping that he would
9:49
say, yeah, but you want to live with me. But I didn't want to ask it.
9:52
Right. And he's like, do you just want to move
9:55
in? I'm like, yes, that is what I want to do. I would like to do
9:58
that. Perfect.
10:01
Now we live in an apartment.
10:02
>> Speaker B: Dude, that's awesome,
10:05
man. So
10:07
that's small world part one, I guess.
10:10
Um, the other weird small world
10:13
thing is you're talking about your journey through
10:15
education and working in education.
10:19
Homie, I am currently going back
10:22
to school to teach in a high school.
10:25
And I'm teaching special education, of all things.
10:29
Yeah, I'm living the dream. I've got the behavior
10:32
kids.
10:34
>> Speaker A: Nice.
10:34
>> Speaker B: Yeah, they tell me how it is every minute of every day,
10:37
dude.
10:38
>> Speaker A: Yes, they do. If I were to be a
10:41
teacher again, I think it would be in
10:44
special ed. Uh, like, even high school secondary
10:47
special ed. Um, I get along with them well, too. I feel
10:50
like. I don't know. I mean
10:53
this in the kindest way possible. No, I hear you. I think it's related
10:55
to, like, I like working with young kids. Then you have high school special
10:58
ed kids, and there's kind of this young aspect to
11:01
them.
11:02
>> Speaker B: A lot of times, mentally and emotionally,
11:05
they are much younger than they are on
11:07
paper.
11:08
>> Speaker A: Um, exactly. Except, like, calculus and stuff
11:11
sometimes and.
11:13
>> Speaker B: Could beat somebody up.
11:15
>> Speaker A: But, like, dude,
11:18
yes, there's some just massive
11:22
special ed kids or teddy bears. Oh, yeah.
11:25
I don't know. I probably shouldn't tell a story because it's like, hey,
11:28
but anyway, there's some big kids that
11:31
like to take their clothes off randomly
11:35
and they just love you, and you're like, get your clothes on
11:37
now, please.
11:40
>> Speaker B: Um, your arms are just straight up in the
11:43
air. Like, please stop,
11:50
dude. Yeah, like, we.
11:53
We had a kid. Yeah, never mind. No, I
11:56
hear you.
11:57
>> Speaker A: Um.
11:58
>> Speaker B: Wow. And you
12:01
were, ah, a janitor. So I have some
12:04
bathroom. Were you doing any sort
12:07
of bathroom related janitorial or was it
12:10
away from the zone of
12:13
disaster?
12:14
>> Speaker A: No, uh, I definitely cleaned a lot
12:17
of toilets while a janitor. I didn't even
12:20
think of that, honestly.
12:23
Um, let's see. I cleaned the dining hall in the morning,
12:26
didn't do bathrooms to that. But then I did
12:29
the bathrooms in
12:32
PBG or in Balio and Davidson.
12:35
Both guys and girl bathrooms, actually. I
12:38
remember, which is
12:41
tough. Know there's
12:44
open dorm hours at corbin. I don't know how
12:47
it is now, but there was only certain days where it was
12:50
like open dorms, I think by the time, or like open halls,
12:52
like you can be in the hallway, supposed to be allowed to be in the hallways at
12:55
certain times, and you're just like hoping there's
12:58
not a girl coming out of the bathroom with a towel.
13:01
Uh, I don't remember anything specific, but now, then
13:04
I'd just be like so awkward. Like, girls coming out
13:07
of the bathroom, you're like knocking on the door and
13:11
they can't differentiate me from another student.
13:14
>> Speaker B: Right?
13:14
>> Speaker A: I don't know, maybe that's better. Like, if I'm like a 50 year old guy knocking
13:17
on the girl's bathroom door, maybe that's worse. I'm not sure. But you're
13:20
like anyone in here.
13:23
Uh, but the worst part is, once you're in there, then
13:26
it's more terrifying because you're like in a
13:29
stall cleaning. At least on the outside.
13:32
You hear somebody just turn away, but you're in there. Maybe they
13:35
just run in, you're cornered.
13:38
>> Speaker B: Yes, man. Did you ever have to
13:41
clean up any big deposits
13:44
or wild misses or anything like
13:46
that? Um,
13:50
also weird, I did janitorial at the same
13:53
place Richard and I worked at for ten years.
13:55
And those kids can't hit a
13:58
target.
13:59
>> Speaker A: It's bad.
14:02
You're not talking about young life, are you? This is something different.
14:05
>> Speaker B: No, Richard was doing young life as well at the time,
14:07
but, um, this was like a foster
14:10
mental health services place. Uh, you
14:13
ask him about. Oh, he'll know.
14:15
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I can't really think of
14:18
anything too terrible that I
14:21
saw in a toilet.
14:24
People wouldn't flush, but that's not the end of the
14:27
world and I'm pretty
14:30
tolerable to
14:33
human waste. It doesn't bother me that
14:35
much, but I don't remember anything that was
14:38
particularly disgusting. I wish I had some crazy
14:41
story. No, it's better
14:44
off digested like fig bars or. So I
14:47
don't know, like some random crap. Crap. Uh,
14:50
yeah.
14:51
>> Speaker B: Hey, no, you're better off for it.
14:55
I have a friend who's a janitor at our high school,
14:58
and he's like, dude, honestly, I haven't seen anything crazy. And I was
15:01
like, dude, bless you.
15:04
Be thankful. That's good.
15:06
Um, I have a hunch
15:10
if you want to just be like, hey, I'm not answering that.
15:13
I'm going to dig myself a hole if I do.
15:15
But were the girls rooms a little bit worse than the guys
15:18
rooms?
15:20
>> Speaker A: You're talking about the bathrooms?
15:21
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
15:26
>> Speaker A: Um, I don't think so.
15:28
>> Speaker B: Oh, really?
15:29
>> Speaker A: It was comparable. I don't
15:32
quite remember, to be honest.
15:35
That was a while ago. Yeah, but
15:38
I guess you didn't clean girls bathrooms.
15:42
>> Speaker B: Our facility did the gender
15:45
nonconforming bathrooms there towards the end.
15:48
>> Speaker A: Okay.
15:49
>> Speaker B: Everybody was doing their business where everybody else
15:52
was doing it.
15:53
>> Speaker A: Uh, got it.
15:54
>> Speaker B: But, yeah, girls create a particular type of mess
15:57
that I would have to clean up. That was just like, man.
16:00
>> Speaker A: Uh, okay. Yes, there was.
16:03
It brings back memories. Yeah. You
16:06
don't usually see different
16:09
colors.
16:10
>> Speaker B: Yes.
16:11
>> Speaker A: Maybe that's a good way of putting it. Yeah. Where it's
16:13
like, I, uh, don't know. The first time I saw it, I'm like,
16:16
what happened? Okay. Yeah. Got it.
16:20
They didn't put it in the special little trash can.
16:23
>> Speaker B: Yes. Dang.
16:24
>> Speaker A: Yeah. Change a lot of those sanitary, like
16:27
the little mini ones?
16:28
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Those are a blessing
16:31
and a curse because they
16:34
get weird pretty quick.
16:37
Um, and it's nobody's fault, but they just
16:40
do, um.
16:43
>> Speaker A: Man, lots of
16:46
tampons on the ground and stuff like that. Or like the tampon
16:49
cases, the plastic,
16:52
the blasters. The blasters, yeah, they
16:55
look like someone's, um, shooting up drugs or
16:58
something. Like they're little cats.
17:01
>> Speaker B: Yeah. I always think
17:04
of it, it's like those little kid, like, air rockets
17:07
where you squish the end and it shoots the rocket off the end,
17:10
but instead it's not a
17:12
rocket.
17:13
>> Speaker A: No.
17:14
>> Speaker B: Or it is. And however you want to look at it.
17:16
Uh, yeah, there's
17:19
probably. Let's, um, be honest. No. Girls, listen to this.
17:22
So if there was, there would
17:25
be like, these guys have never
17:27
interacted with these in a way that's actually real.
17:30
Uh, which is
17:33
better? Um, yeah. So you're
17:36
working trails. What are you doing with
17:38
that? I was trying to get a gauge for it when
17:41
we were, like, chatting. But are you clearing
17:44
trails or establishing new
17:47
trails? I was trying to look
17:49
up the job description, and I couldn't get a
17:52
feel for it.
17:54
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, all the above. You hit on some
17:57
of the things we do. So sometimes,
17:59
like post fire, a, uh,
18:02
forest burns. There'll be a lot of standing
18:05
timber that's charred and maybe half
18:08
alive. But that means the
18:11
roots are compromised or they're just really weak. And so you get a lot
18:14
of logs down. So we've had to deal a lot with that.
18:16
In Arizona, there's been, like, a lot of fires over the last ten
18:19
years. So a lot of trees are coming down over the trail.
18:22
It might be like, in a really bad section, you have like a
18:25
mile of trail and there's like, I don't know, like 30,
18:28
40 trees down over it. Wow. So you have
18:31
to clear the. That's like, kind of
18:34
the minimum you're going to do. Like, you don't want logs on the
18:37
trail, especially like a giant tree. But then
18:40
if there's logs off the trail, there could be other things. Like
18:42
maybe a portion of the trail goes along kind of the edge of a
18:45
cliff or a bank, and it's eroded
18:48
away so that you'd have to scramble
18:50
uphill in order to get around in order to get to the other side of
18:53
the trail. So then we would build, like, some sort of retaining
18:56
wall or reroute the trail. And, uh, that's another thing.
18:59
Sometimes we just do full reroutes where
19:02
for 400 meters, you just have to build completely
19:05
new tread. They call it just the surface of the trail. And you
19:08
go some routes, and so just figuring out where it's the best
19:11
place to put it and considering drainage and where the water is going to
19:13
come through and all that sort of thing.
19:16
>> Speaker B: That's crazy. I know you
19:19
probably gave me a pretty shortened
19:22
version, but there were so many variables in
19:25
there. It's just like,
19:27
oh, my gosh. Wow.
19:30
>> Speaker A: Uh, I don't really know what I'm. I've only done
19:33
this for three months, and I have volunteered before doing trails,
19:36
but I didn't really learn a whole lot. I just kind of helped out.
19:38
But there's a lot to it and there's a lot of
19:41
people. Well, not a lot of people. There are people doing
19:44
less good trail work. And my trail crew leader be like, oh,
19:47
they messed up here. They shouldn't have done this. Why do they
19:49
route it this way?
19:51
>> Speaker B: Wow.
19:52
>> Speaker A: Yeah, there's a lot to it and there's a lot to learn. It's a very
19:55
physical job, though. It's pretty exhausting.
19:57
>> Speaker B: Yeah, I imagine. Um, and so
20:00
while you're out there, are you just like, camping for
20:03
multiple days? Because
20:05
otherwise are, uh, you coming back in every night? How's
20:08
that work?
20:09
>> Speaker A: So, for the most part, we're
20:12
camping out of a car. We're car camping. So, like, intense. But,
20:15
like, just driving up to a campsite or some sort of forest
20:18
service site. Yeah. So I sleep in a
20:21
tent more than I sleep at, uh, my apartment
20:24
because I'm out for eight days and back for six.
20:26
If the trail is or where we're doing
20:29
work is so remote that it wouldn't
20:32
make sense to hike in each day to do the
20:35
work. Then we'll camp out right near the job site
20:38
because you don't want to be spending 3 hours
20:41
hiking in just a couple of hours
20:44
of work and then having to hike back. So sometimes we'll
20:47
just live out of a backpack, essentially.
20:49
Backpacking.
20:50
>> Speaker B: Dang, man.
20:51
>> Speaker A: Yeah, dude. It's been
20:54
mainly just car camping so far, but again, I've only been
20:57
here three months, so I'm not exactly
21:00
sure. I think it's, for the most part, car camping is
21:03
kind of the norm for trail work.
21:06
>> Speaker B: Yeah, dude,
21:10
um, I'm going to beat the nail on
21:13
the head. Uh, so you shared that. While you're
21:16
out on these trail crews, uh, you've had
21:18
ample opportunity to use bush,
21:21
uh, and to do your business in
21:24
nature. So feel, uh, free
21:27
to give all of us just some
21:30
Sam bagenstas pro tips of,
21:33
uh, pro tips. Going,
21:36
going, um, to. In the bush.
21:38
>> Speaker A: Yeah. I think the first thing is after
21:41
you've been going to the bathroom outside for a while and after
21:44
you've known your crew,
21:47
you start going closer and closer to where they are.
21:50
Like, the first time, you're, like, hiking a mile away, you're just
21:53
getting so far away so that no one could possibly
21:56
hear or see you. Um, but pretty soon,
21:59
it's like, if I'm going to be pooping multiple times a
22:02
day in the outdoors, and especially if
22:04
it's in a remote trail, there are times we'll be pooping, like,
22:07
literally, like, a couple of feet off the trail.
22:11
I've done it. If there's no one there, the
22:14
trail is so terrible that no one's
22:17
coming out there. It's been closed for years.
22:20
So
22:23
poop as close as you can because you don't want to make any more trouble
22:26
for yourself than you have to.
22:28
>> Speaker B: Right.
22:29
>> Speaker A: So, uh, poop nearby. Let's see.
22:31
Don't wear your bright orange hard hat. You're
22:34
on the trail crew. The first couple of times,
22:37
I'm like, oh, I'm really well hidden. And I realized I'm, uh, wearing
22:40
this bright orange hard hat. They can see me through the
22:43
woods, even if I'm, like, 500
22:46
yards away.
22:48
>> Speaker B: Squatting and looking around. I
22:51
wonder if anybody can see.
22:53
>> Speaker A: Yeah. The nice thing about doing trail
22:56
work and pooping is that you have
22:59
excellent tools available to you. You dig a really
23:02
good cat hole. So you have these things called
23:04
pickmatics or pulaskis that have just, like, a really nice
23:07
pick at the end and, like, a matic type, like,
23:10
ho type thing on the other side. Okay. You can dig,
23:13
like, an eight inch deep
23:16
cat hole in, like, I don't know, 20
23:18
seconds. Wow.
23:21
Because I don't know if you've ever tried to dig a hole
23:24
to stick or your shoe.
23:27
No. And you end up just basically doing
23:29
the thing from up, uh, where you poop first and you
23:32
cover it up and make a little mound.
23:36
So if you have a good tool, it just makes it so much easier.
23:39
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Dang.
23:41
>> Speaker A: Let's see.
23:44
How much have you pooped outside?
23:47
>> Speaker B: Uh, when I was growing up, my dad and I and my uncles
23:50
would go hunting, and so, um,
23:54
you'd hang it over a log every now and then and just kind of,
23:57
like, hold on and let it fly.
23:59
>> Speaker A: Uh, yeah.
24:00
>> Speaker B: And then, uh, I've gone
24:04
in necessity, if I'm out and
24:07
about. I think the last time was probably four
24:09
years ago. Uh, and I was hiking,
24:12
and you just trundle up into the woods a little
24:15
ways and go, um,
24:18
you're not doing it regulation, then, but here we
24:21
are.
24:21
>> Speaker A: Right.
24:21
>> Speaker B: But, yeah, no, uh, I don't go out of my
24:24
way to do it, but I'm cool with
24:27
it. I like the idea
24:30
of it.
24:31
>> Speaker A: Do you like the experience, like,
24:33
pooping outside?
24:35
>> Speaker B: Um, I'm going to go
24:37
with the honest answer and say I don't really,
24:42
uh. And part of it is because
24:46
I think it's anxiety about,
24:50
should I be doing it here?
24:52
Um, and then there's also, just, like,
24:55
this isn't how things normally go.
25:00
I've got a coddled bottom where it's just like, I'm so
25:03
used to coming in contact
25:06
with porcelain to where now the act of doing
25:09
that just kind of puts my mental
25:11
state in a. Okay, now it's time to flush it out.
25:14
>> Speaker A: Uh, yeah.
25:17
>> Speaker B: I think I have to hype myself up a lot more when I'm
25:19
in the woods. I think
25:22
even on, like, porta potty situations, I have to get kind
25:25
of hyped. I would rather poop over a log than in a
25:28
porta potty half the time, though.
25:30
>> Speaker A: Oh, 100% porta potties. Are just
25:33
disgusting box.
25:37
And they just heat up filled with
25:39
turds. So
25:42
part of the reason I asked is I was just curious what sort
25:45
of things you use to wipe with outside because
25:48
everyone's got their own different material. They
25:51
use, like, I do carry toilet
25:53
paper, and I usually, uh, use toilet paper,
25:56
but I'm also just always looking for good material when
25:59
I'm just hiking around, working and
26:02
thinking, if I had to go, what would I use? And in
26:05
Arizona, everything is prickly and
26:08
hard and dry. You live in the Pacific
26:11
Northwest where everything's toilet paper all
26:14
around you. You can just pick a branch off a tree. It's going to
26:17
be pretty soft here. You're going to get
26:19
a thorn up your butt.
26:21
>> Speaker B: It's a cactus.
26:25
Oh, man. Um,
26:28
this is probably like, man, we're
26:31
going to the dark zone. So, um,
26:34
on the show a long time ago, I talked about how the
26:37
ancient Romans or somebody or. No, it was
26:40
like ancient native american cultures and
26:42
stuff. They would use like a spent corn
26:45
cob. Uh, uh. And
26:48
you just kind of get back there with the spent corn cob.
26:53
And it's biodegradable.
26:56
Um, but I would think any
26:59
sort of orange peel,
27:02
I feel like that's got to be a,
27:04
um, strong pick. It's got a little bit of a
27:07
flexibility to it, but an orange
27:09
peel. Yeah, I think, see, if I am up
27:12
against the wall and I don't have paper, I'm either just going
27:15
to do a
27:18
leaves and finger and just kind of like, wash that
27:21
off later or I'm going to reach for
27:24
some sort of fruit rind or.
27:30
I don't know, man. Uh, yeah,
27:33
no, but yeah, a fruit rind of
27:36
some sort is like the top of my head
27:38
answer there. Um,
27:41
but honestly, yeah, you're
27:44
right. Like, you're in the desert. Um, it's
27:47
tough.
27:48
>> Speaker A: Yeah. I usually try to look for young plants. So,
27:51
like a really young fern
27:54
that's just popped up, it can be really
27:57
soft, but then sometimes you have, like, little particles
28:00
of the plant coming off as you're wiping. Uh, and it's
28:03
just like if you had a giant pile of
28:06
shredded toilet paper, that's not ideal.
28:09
That's kind of what it's like. You just have, like, a giant pile of
28:12
soft, but you start to get
28:15
more, uh, less picky
28:18
as you poop outside. More. At least I have found that
28:20
personally, and I have coworkers that would find with
28:23
using a rock, like a smooth stone, or they
28:26
use like, a pine branch. Like
28:29
one person just uses. It doesn't have to be a young pine
28:32
branch, and you just kind of do it the right way. You don't want the needles going with
28:35
the grain. Go with the grain. And I
28:38
imagine that works pretty well. And I'll probably the only thing with
28:41
pine is that it gets really sappy, so that could be
28:44
bad. You got to be careful. There's no SAP on it.
28:46
But the stones, I hear those are quite
28:49
nice. You get a nice, smooth stone, but it also
28:52
depends on the individual, uh,
28:55
butthole, I guess, because some people have, like, an
28:58
Andy Dwyer, like, marker situation.
29:00
Parks and rec, where it's just a rock's not going
29:03
to do it. You're going to coat that whole thing, and you're
29:06
still coming out.
29:07
>> Speaker B: Yeah. You're going to need the full five smooth stones to get that
29:10
job done.
29:11
>> Speaker A: Exactly. You need a whole pile.
29:15
>> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh.
29:17
>> Speaker A: Ah.
29:20
>> Speaker B: Yeah, the dude that's on the pine branch
29:23
situation. Um,
29:26
that is something else,
29:29
right? Yeah.
29:30
>> Speaker A: Uh, it fascinates me how some people are a
29:33
lot quicker, a lot slower than others,
29:35
because some people will
29:38
be gone for, like, 20 minutes, and other people, it's just, like, in and
29:41
out type situation. This isn't just outside,
29:44
but some people are so quick,
29:46
they just drop their log and then they're back.
29:49
But other people are like an experience,
29:52
I guess. I don't know.
29:55
>> Speaker B: Right. Wow.
29:59
The Pine branch has got me, dude.
30:03
Um, I don't know if I could do that.
30:07
I'm sure it's probably not as bad as I think,
30:10
but, man, I think there would be a barrier there
30:13
for me.
30:13
>> Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, some people, when they backpack,
30:16
they use leaves or rocks or something
30:19
for the bulk of it, and then they kind of
30:22
polish with a little bit of toilet paper, like a square.
30:25
>> Speaker B: Okay. I like the idea. Uh, polish.
30:28
Yeah.
30:28
>> Speaker A: And some people are a little bit more, uh,
30:31
finicky about leaving, essentially, trash in the
30:34
woods. Toilet paper. It's called toilet paper
30:37
gardens. You come back later to a certain spot, and there's toilet
30:40
paper everywhere.
30:41
>> Speaker B: Right.
30:41
>> Speaker A: That's kind of not nice.
30:43
>> Speaker B: Uh, wow.
30:44
>> Speaker A: You'd think it would biodegrade really easily, but it doesn't.
30:46
>> Speaker B: Yeah, well, that's just it.
30:49
It doesn't break down. They've
30:52
got to put something in it that makes it pulpy or something.
30:55
I don't know. Yeah, it's
30:58
something else.
30:59
>> Speaker A: Um.
31:00
>> Speaker B: I'm lost for words on that pine branch. I don't know why
31:03
I'm stuck on that. Uh,
31:06
hey, good for him.
31:07
>> Speaker A: More power to him. He's a champ.
31:10
>> Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. Um, well,
31:13
hey, so, Sam uh,
31:17
do you have any other. Just wild stories
31:20
that you want to share?
31:23
>> Speaker A: Uh, pooping stories?
31:26
Yeah.
31:26
>> Speaker B: Or just like, bathroom stories in
31:29
general?
31:30
>> Speaker A: Uh, yeah. Oh, my gosh. I
31:32
mean, I have, like, an embarrassing one from
31:35
when I was younger.
31:37
>> Speaker B: Hey.
31:39
>> Speaker A: So when I was younger, I was the baby of
31:42
the family until I was like, nine. And then
31:45
my younger brother came along. Surprise. And he was
31:48
born. But before that, I was the
31:50
youngest. We were all separated by, like a year and a half or
31:53
so. Four of us, four of us older kids. And
31:56
for whatever reason, it took me a long time
31:59
to learn how to wipe. It just wasn't an easy process
32:02
for me. And being home schooled at
32:05
home all the time, and then being the youngest and not quite
32:08
knowing when I was saying something embarrassing,
32:10
I would say things at home that
32:13
when you're out in public, it's not okay to
32:16
say, or it's embarrassing. So one of the things I would say,
32:19
instead of, like, so I would be going poop, and
32:22
I was one of those kids that would just be on the toilet forever.
32:25
I was like a big daydreamer. It would take me a long
32:28
time to poop.
32:32
My mom wouldn't know to wipe me
32:35
until I told her. And so every time I finished
32:38
pooping, which could be like a half hour, I
32:40
would shout out, I need wiping. And,
32:43
like, at home, whatever. No one really cares.
32:46
They're just used to that. And then. So I just didn't
32:49
know that that would be an embarrassing thing to say. Didn't think it
32:52
through. The one time was over at a family friend's
32:55
house, and I was in the bathroom just having a great time,
32:58
pooping, daydreaming, just doing
33:00
my normal stuff, right? And my
33:03
mom wasn't coming, which
33:06
was normal, so I just shouted, I, uh,
33:09
need wiping. And I just hear this
33:12
laughter immediately from everyone who was there. Like my
33:15
family, like my friends and my friends parents and whoever
33:18
else is there, they were just laughing and laughing.
33:20
And that just dawned on me. Like, this is such a
33:23
stupid thing to say in front of all these other people.
33:26
And from then on, I never said that.
33:28
I never shouted that again, even when at home. It was just like,
33:31
so embarrassing. But then my mom hadn't
33:34
gotten used, and I was still pretty young, so I still didn't know how to
33:37
wipe. And so my mom had gotten used to
33:40
me shouting it. And then fast forward, like, I
33:43
don't know, six months or something, I'm at my grandma's
33:45
house and I'm in this bathroom, and,
33:48
ah, this isn't just family, friends. Now we have all these
33:51
relatives in this house, and I'm
33:54
pooping, and I'm done. And
33:57
I don't want to shout out, I need wiping, because I realize
34:00
the negative social things that will happen then. So
34:02
I'm just waiting, just hoping, come on, mom. Come
34:05
wipe me. I don't even know if I even.
34:07
>> Speaker B: Told her I was pooping.
34:09
>> Speaker A: And so I was just in there for so long, and
34:12
I just started crying. Um, and I think eventually my mom
34:15
came and found me, and it was just so
34:17
embarrassing. And I think that's probably when I learned
34:20
how to wipe. I'm like, this can't happen. I just need to know how to
34:23
do this. Isn't like it's that. I mean, it is kind of difficult when
34:26
you're young and your motor functions are kind of bad.
34:29
>> Speaker B: Tough dude,
34:32
with our kids, our
34:34
son's old enough now where we're trying to, like, he still does
34:37
that. Where it's like, dad. But, hey,
34:41
you're fixing to go to school, dude.
34:44
You got to try to figure this out.
34:48
>> Speaker A: I have so many stories
34:51
of having to wipe kids butts in
34:54
school. Probably the stories I can't tell. But just,
34:56
like, I have dealt with so much human
34:59
poop while a teacher, when you
35:02
sub as a kindergarten teacher, as a first grade teacher, and
35:05
then special ed, it's just poop all the
35:08
time, pee all the time.
35:10
>> Speaker B: You are wiping a lot.
35:13
>> Speaker A: And the boys don't care. The boys will be like.
35:15
They'll shout in the bathroom if there's a situation. Unless they're, like,
35:18
super shy. But it's not until they're, like, six or seven, they
35:21
get really self conscious. The most
35:24
kindergartners are just like, whatever. But
35:26
the girls,
35:30
they won't say that there's a problem, and they get really
35:32
embarrassed and they feel so, I mean, then I can't deal with it. And then
35:35
I'm having to have to get an
35:38
instructional assistant or call the office or something like
35:41
that. Because what am I going to do if a girl
35:43
poops her pants? I guess I could just tell her to go change it, but she
35:46
probably can't even do that right.
35:49
>> Speaker B: Man, that's tough.
35:52
I'm very glad that I work with high school students. Um,
35:56
there's a lot.
35:56
>> Speaker A: For the most part, they got it down.
35:59
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Every now and then you see one doing a funny little
36:02
walk, and it's like, hey, bud,
36:04
you good? Do you need to. Let's go take a walk
36:07
down to the clothes closet. I think you know what to do.
36:10
>> Speaker A: Um, uh, the saggy
36:13
walk.
36:13
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
36:14
>> Speaker A: It's a telltale sign.
36:16
>> Speaker B: Yeah, dude, I saw one, like, the saggy
36:19
walk started, and
36:23
it came right out the pant leg.
36:27
>> Speaker A: We're not stopping.
36:28
>> Speaker B: We're just moving. If we stop to go back for it, everyone's going
36:31
to know that you did that.
36:33
>> Speaker A: Oh, my gosh.
36:35
>> Speaker B: Yeah, it's something else.
36:38
Uh, wow. Hey,
36:41
but I feel like what you
36:43
went through is pretty normal. I feel like that's
36:47
typical little kid stuff.
36:49
>> Speaker A: I hadn't thought about that for years, and then
36:52
when I learned when I was going to
36:55
come on here, I was just thinking about poop
36:58
stories. I'm like, oh, yeah. I just remember just
37:01
that being so embarrassing for so long.
37:04
And I was so introverted, too,
37:07
and so shy. It's like, yeah,
37:10
I would rather cry in the bathroom for 2 hours than
37:12
have anyone know that I need wiping.
37:16
>> Speaker B: Dang, man.
37:16
>> Speaker A: I know. Force sam just sitting by the shelf
37:19
on the toilet.
37:21
>> Speaker B: Yeah. And then there's me. Just like,
37:24
I pooped.
37:26
>> Speaker A: It just came back to me. It's my aunt. I don't
37:29
think I locked the door or something. My aunt came in and found
37:32
me crying on the toilet. That's what happened.
37:35
Yeah, that was rough.
37:38
>> Speaker B: Wow. That is tough, dude.
37:41
Man, I don't even know.
37:46
I know it's like, a long time ago, but that's, uh,
37:49
a thing. I don't know. I think little kids go through that a lot
37:53
is hard, dude.
37:55
>> Speaker A: Yeah. They got a lot to figure out.
37:57
>> Speaker B: Yeah. It's probably pretty
38:00
great having most of your stuff paid for for you,
38:03
but other than that, it seems
38:06
like it's generally
38:08
undesirable, uh, to be a
38:11
kid.
38:12
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I'd go back.
38:15
>> Speaker B: Well, hey, I have some questions that I
38:17
ask everybody,
38:21
and feel free if it comes up and you're just like,
38:23
nah, ain't doing that one. Pass. Hard pass.
38:26
But I feel like they're pretty safe.
38:28
>> Speaker A: I'm a pretty open book. The only reason I would never talk about
38:31
something, generally speaking, is to protect other
38:34
people. That's really the only reason I will talk
38:37
about pretty much anything.
38:38
>> Speaker B: Yeah. So
38:41
you talked about your toilet
38:43
papering situations when you're on the
38:46
trail or trail crew. Um, but
38:49
there in the riffle. Casa de
38:52
riffle. Um, what type of toilet paper are
38:55
you guys rocking?
38:58
Were. If you, Sam, are choosing the
39:00
toilet paper, what are you picking? What are you going
39:03
for?
39:05
>> Speaker A: I'm just looking at what toilet paper we even
39:08
have right now.
39:09
>> Speaker B: Yes.
39:09
>> Speaker A: I'm not like, a toilet paper connoisseur. This
39:12
appears to be, like, two ply.
39:14
>> Speaker B: Okay.
39:15
>> Speaker A: Um, acceptable. On the trail, I use one
39:18
ply. Yeah, we have angel
39:20
soft here.
39:23
Mega roll.
39:26
Is that good? I don't know if that's good.
39:28
>> Speaker B: That's thick. That's a thick roll.
39:30
>> Speaker A: Um.
39:33
>> Speaker B: The trail comment just prompted my
39:35
brain. Have you ever seen the trick where you
39:38
poke your finger through the toilet paper and then
39:41
you dig the
39:44
brown out with the finger, and then you just kind of
39:46
reverse sandwich the paper over your
39:49
finger and just remove all of it with, like, one or two
39:52
squares?
39:54
>> Speaker A: Where'd you hear that?
39:56
>> Speaker B: Um, my buddy, who is in
39:59
the military. So word gets out
40:02
that I like bathrooms too much, and then everybody just has like,
40:04
hey, have you ever done this? And I'm like, under what
40:07
context would I scream my
40:10
index finger down my butthole to
40:13
do that? He's like, well,
40:16
when you need to. And I'm like, well, uh, no. Yeah,
40:19
that's one.
40:20
>> Speaker A: That's super funny, because
40:23
we were just having a conversation about pooping on the
40:26
trail crew, and that
40:29
thing that you just said is apparently
40:31
something like, uh, uh,
40:34
initiation thing or a prank thing
40:37
that really, uh, trail crews that they'll do
40:40
sometimes. M in conservation
40:43
course. So I get paid, like, a full
40:46
time employee. Most people that are on trail cruise
40:49
are pretty young or in college or just
40:52
out of college, and they're getting paid stipends,
40:55
and, uh, you just get paid, like, nothing to do trail work, but you get,
40:57
like, experience. How most people
41:00
get into it is through the conservation corps, but apparently
41:03
that's, like, something that you can tell
41:06
people. Yeah, you can mess with someone. I don't
41:08
know. Isn't that kind of funny?
41:10
>> Speaker B: Maybe my homie is messing with me is really what we're
41:13
learning. Hey, you should try this.
41:16
>> Speaker A: I don't think anyone actually does that. If you have a square of toilet
41:19
paper, I feel like it's just a better use of it to
41:22
just use.
41:22
>> Speaker B: The square right
41:25
now that I'm thinking through it. As usual, Sam,
41:28
you're making more sense than the world
41:31
around you. When you have
41:34
access to your paper, are you a
41:37
folder, or are you a crumpler?
41:39
>> Speaker A: Oh, I fold for sure. I'm a
41:41
folder. Do you fold?
41:43
>> Speaker B: Oh, absolutely. It's just a sign of an orderly
41:46
mind.
41:47
>> Speaker A: Exactly. I usually try to
41:49
do three squares, too,
41:52
my dude.
41:53
>> Speaker B: I'm on record. Like, three squares, four to
41:56
five if it's wet.
42:01
If you've got a particular swamp going on, you got to
42:04
maybe get, like, one or two extra squares. But, yeah,
42:06
three squares. It should be able to get it
42:09
done.
42:10
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I agree.
42:12
>> Speaker B: Um, are you a bar
42:15
soap or a liquid soap lad?
42:18
>> Speaker A: Oh. Ah. Liquid soap. Bar soap is
42:20
just. I don't know how you do it. You like, wipe your
42:23
hand on it once, and then you get a tiny bit of soap and
42:26
then, uh. I don't get it. Are you supposed to get it wet and then just coat
42:29
your hand in it? Are you supposed to take the bar of soap and,
42:32
uh, put it on your body?
42:37
>> Speaker B: If you don't have a rag, you have to just go straight
42:40
to the body with the soap. Uh, but if you have a rag,
42:43
I think you nest the soap in the
42:46
rag. I don't know.
42:49
>> Speaker A: I've grabbed the soap before, but I only ever grab a bar of
42:52
soap when I'm at someone else's house and it's like, has
42:55
this touched my friend's mom's butt? I don't
42:58
want to put that on my body.
42:59
>> Speaker B: Or other things.
43:00
>> Speaker A: Or other things. And then if you grab the soap, like
43:03
when soap gets wet, it gets slippery and so you're going to
43:06
drop it too? Yeah, I don't
43:09
know. Liquid soap. I'll do
43:12
honey body wash or whatever.
43:15
>> Speaker B: Okay.
43:15
>> Speaker A: Old spice. Usually get the old
43:18
spice body wash. That stuff's good, too.
43:21
>> Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. Um,
43:24
how do you, Sam, how do you feel about baths?
43:27
>> Speaker A: Baths?
43:30
Um, I don't usually take baths now
43:33
and then. If I'm really sick and feverish,
43:36
it feels really good to pour a hot
43:39
bath. Pour a bath?
43:41
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
43:41
>> Speaker A: Do you get a bath going? Yeah. So just fill in the
43:44
tub water. I'm just describing a bath is what I'm doing
43:47
right now. You fill it up with hot water, then you get in the water, and
43:50
then it's different than a shower because you're just sitting in the water
43:53
and that's pretty nice.
43:54
>> Speaker B: Yeah. There's a body
43:57
fill thing that I have to get past for
43:59
baths.
44:01
>> Speaker A: That's a good point.
44:02
>> Speaker B: But I guess if you're sick, I could see where you could
44:05
get past it a lot quicker. It's like, this is helping me not
44:08
feel terrible.
44:10
>> Speaker A: Uh, yes, that is true. I will also
44:13
say, and I will not get in particular to go any farther
44:16
in this. Baths are not
44:19
romantic. They're just absolutely
44:21
not. And it's just too many people in
44:24
a tub. A tub is not very big,
44:27
romantic baths. I would
44:30
pour a bath for someone. Put some bubble bath in here.
44:34
Sure. I'll bring you a glass of wine,
44:37
but you can stay in there by yourself.
44:39
Yes.
44:40
>> Speaker B: Allow me to make this awesome for you.
44:43
>> Speaker A: Um.
44:45
>> Speaker B: Sam, it's so weird. I had that exact
44:47
conversation too frequently, like, within
44:50
hours of right now. Um, and it's
44:53
just me trying to explain, like, this is just not it.
44:57
This is not feasible.
44:59
>> Speaker A: Um, no, the mechanics of it don't work out very
45:01
well.
45:03
>> Speaker B: Yes, 100%. Um, I could
45:05
not agree more. And you're right,
45:08
we should just leave it right there. Um,
45:11
do you have any bathroom pet peeves? Like,
45:14
stuff that people do in the bathroom that's
45:17
just like. And I know you were an ra.
45:20
And even if it's like, from back in those dorm days,
45:23
like, things people do in the bathroom that are just like, can you
45:25
stop?
45:26
>> Speaker A: Mhm.
45:27
>> Speaker B: We need to be better.
45:28
>> Speaker A: I mean, the things that come to mind are just like
45:31
the normal ones.
45:34
If you're going to really stink it up, then turn on the
45:36
fan. I would rather you just turn on
45:39
the fan and just kind of let it naturally go away
45:42
than to spray a spray. Sometimes I can
45:45
make a terrible poop free
45:48
thing that's worse than just smelling
45:51
someone else's poop. I would rather smell that
45:53
than some artificial
45:56
rose smell on top of it.
45:59
>> Speaker B: Right.
46:03
>> Speaker A: I know some people flush multiple
46:06
times as they're going, and that's supposed to help with
46:09
it. Some people don't even like smelling their own poop, and so
46:12
they poop once, and I was just talking about
46:14
this. Some female coworkers of people
46:17
that poop and flush poop because they don't want
46:20
this aroma going on and they
46:23
don't even like their own aroma, which I feel like a lot
46:26
of people don't mind the scent of their own.
46:29
>> Speaker B: Yeah,
46:32
I think our brains are wired
46:35
to be okay with our own thing.
46:38
It's like, yes, that's me. I did
46:41
that.
46:41
>> Speaker A: Just turn the fan on? I guess that's it.
46:43
>> Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely.
46:46
So as far as fast
46:49
food or not fast food, it can be sit in.
46:52
But if and when you eat
46:54
out, have you had a chance to figure out
46:57
what is just fouling you up the worst?
47:00
Who does you the dirtiest?
47:03
>> Speaker A: You're thinking particular restaurants or
47:05
food, or.
47:06
>> Speaker B: Even you could even get as focused in as
47:09
like, this item from this place is, uh,
47:12
the end zone.
47:14
>> Speaker A: Well, I know a lot of people talk about fast food.
47:17
Mexican taco bell taco time. It's kind of a
47:19
big, like, people make jokes about that all the time. I just
47:22
don't really eat that very often. But,
47:25
uh, I think the thing that, uh, gets to me the
47:28
most is spicy food. So
47:31
I like spicy food, but
47:34
I also think I like spicy food
47:37
more than I like spicy food. And
47:39
if I'm going to a chicken wing place and they've got
47:44
hot wings, and then they've got super hot wings,
47:47
and then they got obliterate your butthole hot wings. And
47:49
then they got sign a medical release
47:52
form hot wings. I have to pick the medical release
47:55
form one, because it's like, I want to try the hottest thing they
47:58
have. It depends on
48:01
the place. Some places are legitimately like, this is terrible.
48:04
Some are like, oh, this is good. I'm glad I got the hottest thing. But
48:07
regardless, if it's hot,
48:10
it makes me want to vomit in the next day.
48:13
I've just got diarrhea and just fire
48:16
butthole and all those things. Yeah, but I do
48:19
like it. And I was reading an article about
48:21
how it actually releases
48:24
dopamine. You get to a certain point, you get like an actual
48:26
high from hot foods. And so there's like a
48:29
reason people who addicted hot foods, they like it because
48:32
it's like doing something chemically while at the same time,
48:36
uh, and there's certain foods you
48:38
eat that I eat. And I know instantly, oh,
48:41
this is going to be trouble.
48:44
>> Speaker B: The chicken wing dread.
48:45
>> Speaker A: Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
48:48
>> Speaker B: Wow. Hey, he's a heat seeker.
48:51
Um, so when
48:54
we were at Corbin, do you remember Matt
48:56
Gibson?
48:58
>> Speaker A: Gibby?
48:58
>> Speaker B: Uh, he was a soccer
49:01
guy.
49:02
>> Speaker A: He have orange hair or do you have blonde hair?
49:05
>> Speaker B: Yeah, like kind of strawberry. Ah, blonde.
49:08
>> Speaker A: Like, I'm serious. But he did the
49:11
golf ball. Trick shots
49:14
is always off. Yeah.
49:15
>> Speaker B: Shirts off, tarps off, boys.
49:18
Yeah. Um, so
49:21
Gibby, he introduced us to
49:24
the dark shower. And
49:27
have you ever taken a dark shower? Um,
49:31
and if so, what was your experience with
49:34
it?
49:36
>> Speaker A: I just love that it's called the dark shower. It's like
49:38
some sort of shower, forbidden thing. Um,
49:42
I mean, I've definitely done it when the power is off. Like, there's
49:45
still hot water in your hot water tank, but you have no
49:48
power. And so I think that's
49:51
good. But then when you get to the point where all your
49:54
hot water is gone and you're taking a dark
49:56
shower with cold water, and you know, as soon as
49:59
you get out of the shower, it's still going to be cold, and
50:02
then you have to go across the other side of the house
50:05
to get your clothes, it's just too much
50:08
of a bad thing at that point. Dark shower, hot
50:10
water, kind of nice.
50:13
You start adding in these other variables that, for me have
50:17
come along with a dark shower.
50:19
>> Speaker B: Yeah,
50:24
I'm regularly, like, if I'm showering in the morning,
50:27
it's usually like four to 430. And,
50:30
um, I'm trying to just keep the light
50:33
down in the house because I'm not waking
50:36
toddlers up. It's just not going to happen.
50:39
I've just begun to take the dark shower out of necessity, and
50:42
I love it. It's like
50:45
Gavin Lau, he described it
50:48
as like, you're being birthed into your day.
50:51
It's that, ah. Slow. Ease into the
50:54
light.
50:55
>> Speaker A: Uh.
50:58
>> Speaker B: He'S a poet, if anything. Uh.
51:02
Um, yeah. Have you
51:05
ever eaten or do you drink anything while in the
51:08
shower?
51:13
>> Speaker A: I don't know. That sounds so nice.
51:16
If you were to ask if I eat anything on the toilet,
51:18
100% yes.
51:20
>> Speaker B: What are you eating on the toilet?
51:24
>> Speaker A: Have you ever eaten anything on the toilet first?
51:26
>> Speaker B: Absolutely.
51:27
>> Speaker A: Okay.
51:30
I'm glad I'm in good company. Um,
51:33
I don't know, like snacks do. Like, I'm not going to eat a salad
51:36
on the toilet, like something salty or fatty,
51:39
like a bag of chips or maybe, like,
51:42
maybe ICE cream or
51:45
chocolate bar. Just something
51:48
good.
51:51
>> Speaker B: The optics on a chocolate bar might be a little freaky,
51:54
but, like, uh.
51:55
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I've done a chocolate bar specifically, we're
51:58
like a Snickers bar. That's worse.
52:01
>> Speaker B: See, I like the idea of somebody walking in
52:04
on that, and it's just like, what are you
52:06
doing? Uh, what is that?
52:09
>> Speaker A: Speaking of a Snickers bar, my coworkers played a prank
52:12
on me recently.
52:15
They call them hitches when you're off on these different
52:18
projects. So we were on hitch. We got to stay at
52:21
a forest service building because that's like a
52:24
luxury. We're sleeping on cots and we have a kitchen
52:27
and a TV. And I
52:30
go in when it's dark.
52:33
We usually go to bed pretty early because we work ten hour days. It's
52:35
really exhausting. So I went to bed kind of late.
52:38
It was like close to nine or something, maybe.
52:41
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
52:42
>> Speaker A: And I usually listen to music before
52:45
I go to bed and listen to
52:47
music. And I probably listen for like a half hour, maybe
52:50
45 minutes. And
52:52
then I have bluetooth, um,
52:55
earbuds. And so my phone's just sitting in my bed
52:58
somewhere. So I'm feeling around to see where my phone
53:00
is. And then my hand goes on
53:03
this thing and it's like this sticky log
53:06
thing, like
53:09
a turd. And it's dark in the room.
53:12
And I fumble over to the lamp and I turn on the lamp
53:15
and there's like, this brown, sticky
53:17
log. And I've been lying next
53:20
to it for, like, 45 minutes listening
53:23
to chance the rapper while there's this
53:26
log next to me and I've already
53:29
grabbed it. So I'm like, I pick it up and I
53:32
sniff it and it's kind of sweet, like,
53:35
oh, okay, well, this isn't. I don't think it's
53:37
poop, but maybe there's all sorts of thoughts
53:40
going through my head. I'm like, did I poop in my
53:43
sleep the other night? And I like,
53:47
perfect log on my bed. I just grab it and
53:50
I put in the floor.
53:51
>> Speaker B: Smells good.
53:55
>> Speaker A: I was like, what the.
53:59
Apparently they were waiting and, ah,
54:02
they knew I went to the room to
54:05
sleep and just like, at my own room, and then they hear
54:07
nothing and then I don't say anything. The next morning,
54:11
I just forgot about it. But it was just like a
54:13
bar that they had molded into a log.
54:17
I've never grabbed it. I don't know,
54:20
it was disconcerting. Yeah. Did not like
54:22
that.
54:23
>> Speaker B: Wow. Dang. Um,
54:26
yeah, that's wild.
54:29
Um,
54:32
if not, would you ever perform a waffle
54:35
stomp? Do you know what a waffle stomp is? It's fine if you don't. It's
54:38
better if you don't.
54:39
>> Speaker A: I don't know what it is.
54:40
>> Speaker B: Perfect. So a waffle stomp
54:44
is when you just defecate
54:47
into the bottom of the shower while you're
54:50
showering, and then you just kind of river dance
54:52
it to where
54:55
it washes itself down. Uh, and it's
54:58
called a waffle stomp because some of those showers
55:01
have the waffle grate.
55:04
Stomp it through the grate.
55:07
>> Speaker A: I have never pooped in the shower.
55:09
>> Speaker B: Okay.
55:10
>> Speaker A: That I can remember.
55:11
>> Speaker B: Perfect.
55:13
>> Speaker A: If the toilet is right there, I think I would
55:16
just go out to the toilet. Then I get back in the
55:19
shower.
55:20
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Are you drying off at all?
55:23
Is it just wet?
55:25
>> Speaker A: I might just sit wet. That's not bad. I've done that
55:28
many times. Have you ever gone straight from the shower to the toilet
55:30
and just like, uh, whatever.
55:34
>> Speaker B: I usually dry my legs and my butt off
55:37
just because it's a little slippery. Um, that's
55:40
true, but
55:42
I'm not opposed to anybody doing.
55:45
Yeah, I think what you do is the logical
55:48
thing. Now, there's this sub class,
55:51
I'm going to say class because that has to be what it is,
55:54
who are like, pooping and catching it, and then they
55:57
try to skeet it into the toilet like some sort of
55:59
basketball shot. And
56:02
it's just like, just get out of the shower.
56:05
>> Speaker A: Yeah.
56:09
>> Speaker B: I'm stomping it before I'm tossing it.
56:12
>> Speaker A: Um, this might be. I don't know. You don't have to answer this
56:15
if you don't want to, but is there like
56:17
a. I really like Austin Kent's story. That one
56:20
was really. I just. His voice is
56:23
just like a big goober. He was
56:26
great. But where am I going with this?
56:29
Oh, it seems like you stay in pretty
56:31
safe territory. Do you ever do research on
56:34
something? Is there, like, a culture on the Internet where it's like,
56:37
poop stuff? You're like, that's too far. I don't want to read about this
56:40
anymore. I feel like there's got to be stuff you just don't touch because it's.
56:43
>> Speaker B: Like, yeah,
56:46
um, I have,
56:48
uh, a notes page open in my
56:51
phone, and there's safe
56:54
topics. Um, and then there's
56:57
ones that are on the weird part of this list where it's like,
57:00
I don't even know if I could talk about that.
57:03
Um, but, yeah, there's definitely, like a weird,
57:06
dark underbelly of. Yeah. When you
57:09
just start researching just anything
57:11
related to do with pooping, it gets pretty wild.
57:15
Um, and it exists. Um,
57:17
and I know that it exists,
57:19
and
57:22
it's one of those things where it's like, one
57:25
day probably
57:28
won't, but I'm waiting for the day
57:30
where, uh, uh, you and I are chatting, and I
57:33
have somebody on the show, and they just drop the bomb where it's
57:36
like, hey, have you ever heard of this? And it's one of those
57:39
freaky things that's sitting on that list.
57:41
>> Speaker A: Yes.
57:41
>> Speaker B: And I'm just going like, yes, I have.
57:44
Uh, and it's not going to be a proud moment.
57:47
>> Speaker A: Uh.
57:51
>> Speaker B: No, there's definitely some randy stuff out there.
57:53
>> Speaker A: Yeah, sorry,
57:56
this is probably getting off topic. Do you generally not swear?
58:00
Do you have some parameters?
58:02
>> Speaker B: I don't. Um,
58:06
Austin was my first, uh,
58:08
episode labeled explicit.
58:11
Um,
58:14
wasn't even. He didn't really even go off that
58:17
much. Uh, but I don't give
58:20
people parameters because I just like,
58:22
I have a buddy, he's going to be on the show and
58:25
he's going to drop the bombs and
58:29
sitting over here like, well, are we going to
58:32
deconstruct our
58:36
Sunday school?
58:39
Um, I'm fine with it.
58:43
I'll kind of read the room, and
58:46
if the person seems like, yeah, this doesn't bother me, I'm
58:49
cool with it. There's nothing anybody's
58:52
going to say that's going to bother me. Um.
58:57
>> Speaker A: I was just curious.
58:59
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Um, but then I'm
59:01
also, like, working at a church.
59:04
I've got students, and more importantly, students, parents
59:07
who listen, and it's like, hey, uh,
59:10
first, I mean, you clicked on a podcast about
59:13
taking a Poop.
59:17
I'm running out of euphemisms for it.
59:20
>> Speaker A: M. You know, Pewdiepie.
59:23
>> Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
59:25
>> Speaker A: He released a game. This is, like, three or four years ago.
59:28
Do you remember this?
59:30
>> Speaker B: No.
59:30
>> Speaker A: It was called, like, the kingdom of Poopy or
59:33
something.
59:34
>> Speaker B: Okay.
59:35
>> Speaker A: And it was like, an
59:37
arcade style thing. It might have been, like,
59:40
a platform, I don't even know, but it was, like, kind of a
59:43
dumb little game. It was called, like, the kingdom
59:46
of Poopy pee or poopoo peepee. I
59:49
think pewdiepie, itunes
59:51
deleted it, or whoever, apple games or
59:54
whatever service it was on. They said
59:57
they deleted it because it was too explicit.
1:00:00
I just thought that was absurd because it's just, like, poop
1:00:03
humor the whole time. And they have other
1:00:06
games that have all sorts of sexual
1:00:09
things, and that's okay, but then you can't have
1:00:11
a kingdom of poopoo peepee.
1:00:15
Is that coming up with anything? Are you searching that?
1:00:18
>> Speaker B: I'm not right now, but, uh,
1:00:21
yeah, I tossed it in my notes app. That's going
1:00:24
to be a deep dive later, for
1:00:26
sure. Yeah, that's
1:00:29
absurd. We all poop. And
1:00:32
the fun thing was, like, unless you
1:00:35
mark, uh, an
1:00:37
episode as explicit, if it
1:00:40
contains the word butt
1:00:42
or anything that is right on the edge of
1:00:45
crap, it, uh, censors
1:00:48
it. It just puts a c with two dashes, and
1:00:51
it's like, can we.
1:00:54
Come on, there's kids
1:00:56
cartoons that have worse stuff than this.
1:01:00
Just chill out.
1:01:02
>> Speaker A: I have the article up right here. It says the YouTube star
1:01:05
released this new mobile game, poop
1:01:08
dye, that is revealed. It's only currently available on
1:01:11
Android. Uh, so Apple said it was too
1:01:14
disgusting for them. It was due to the
1:01:16
crude imagery.
1:01:19
>> Speaker B: Interesting.
1:01:21
>> Speaker A: I thought that was crazy.
1:01:23
>> Speaker B: Well, I'm going to see if I can. Like, I have a
1:01:25
fire tablet. I'm going to see if I can get that
1:01:28
downloaded.
1:01:30
>> Speaker A: Yeah, it might be amazing.
1:01:31
>> Speaker B: Do a deep dive on that. Well, shoot. Sam,
1:01:34
I appreciate your time. I know
1:01:37
this was a long one, uh, but I think it's just
1:01:39
because it's been a minute.
1:01:42
>> Speaker A: Yeah, sorry, I just kind of started talking and just
1:01:45
didn't stop.
1:01:46
>> Speaker B: No, that's the best. I love
1:01:49
it. That's exactly what I love. Yeah. Do
1:01:52
you have anything, uh, last things
1:01:55
to share with folks? Um, before
1:01:58
I always tell people when I do the closing,
1:02:01
I feel like a dog that's taking a dump in the
1:02:04
backyard while people watch. Like, I hate doing the
1:02:07
closing. But how else will they know
1:02:10
it's over, right?
1:02:11
>> Speaker A: You just got to end it eventually.
1:02:14
>> Speaker B: Yeah.
1:02:15
>> Speaker A: Final poop thoughts? Um,
1:02:18
maybe it's not even what you asked. Uh, I don't
1:02:21
know. Just keep on pooping in the
1:02:24
free world, I guess. Yeah, we
1:02:27
can still poop in freedom. So that's a
1:02:30
great thing. There's been no.
1:02:34
Freedom of poop is a pretty big
1:02:36
deal. And in the western world, we
1:02:39
take it for granted. Yeah,
1:02:42
I don't know.
1:02:43
>> Speaker B: They're going to start regulating us here in a little bit. I know it,
1:02:46
right?
1:02:47
>> Speaker A: Like, length and smell.
1:02:49
>> Speaker B: Yeah. If you flush more than twice,
1:02:52
we're going to start charging you.
1:02:56
>> Speaker A: Uh, you get me going on
1:02:59
these low water toilets, that's a
1:03:02
disaster waiting to happen.
1:03:04
>> Speaker B: It's just bad.
1:03:05
>> Speaker A: It's bad.
1:03:08
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Agreed.
1:03:11
Well, shoot. Uh, I'm going to
1:03:13
close out the show, and then I'll
1:03:16
turn the recording off, and we can just yak if you
1:03:19
want. Or if you're like, hey, man, I'm tired. That's cool, too,
1:03:22
but, yeah. Thank you for being here, Sam. Um,
1:03:25
and thank you all for listening,
1:03:28
as always. You can reach out to us on
1:03:31
social media. We're out there. Privycast.
1:03:33
Privycast@gmail.com. Um, we'd like
1:03:36
to thank Kevin McLeod for the use of bar room ballet as
1:03:39
our intro and outro music. You can find Kevin's
1:03:42
music@incompetent.com. Thanks,
1:03:45
Evan. This has been another episode of Privy. Thank you
1:03:47
so much for listening. And now, as always,
1:03:52
don't forget to flush.
1:03:54
You get to hear the fun audio as I
1:03:57
move the mic to the back of my
1:04:00
toilet. Oh, I don't think I told you.
1:04:02
>> Speaker A: Sam, this is recorded.