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Old School Episodes: The Unspoken Rules of Friendship · All About The Joy

• 0:01
  Ted Hicks: So where do you go to?
• 0:04
  Ted Hicks: Where do you go?
• 0:06
  Ted Hicks: Where do you go to?
• 0:08
  Ted Hicks: I want to know how do you do it.
• 0:11
  Ted Hicks: That thing you do Follow you blindly.
• 0:15
  Ted Hicks: I'll be your fool.
• 0:16
  Ted Hicks: Where do you go to?
• 0:18
  Ted Hicks: Where do you?
• 0:19
  Carmen Lezeth: go?
• 0:19
  Carmen Lezeth: Where do you go to?
• 0:21
  Carmen Lezeth: I want to know how do you do it.
• 0:24
  Carmen Lezeth: Hi everyone, welcome to All About the Joy, the vintage edition.
• 0:29
  Carmen Lezeth: I was going to call it old school, but it's kind of the same thing.
• 0:32
  Carmen Lezeth: I went back and looked at some of our archival live stream footage that we haven't looked at in a long time and I took a few of those and kind of put them all together.
• 0:42
  Carmen Lezeth: And I took a few of those and kind of put them all together and I just want to take a moment to say thank you to this community that we have established here.
• 0:50
  Carmen Lezeth: It's so much fun and I really enjoy it.
• 0:53
  Carmen Lezeth: And I just want to say thank you to the guests, to everyone in the chat, to people who support the show.
• 1:00
  Carmen Lezeth: Just thank you so much.
• 1:02
  Carmen Lezeth: It's been such a fun ride and we look forward to doing so many more of these in the future.
• 1:07
  Carmen Lezeth: So just thank you so much.
• 1:08
  Carmen Lezeth: It's been such a fun ride and we look forward to doing so many more of these in the future.
• 1:10
  Carmen Lezeth: So enjoy the old school stuff and hopefully you'll see what I was trying to get at regarding a theme.
• 1:16
  Carmen Lezeth: And yeah, it is always all about the joy, but it's also all about friendship, enjoy.
• 1:23
  Carmen Lezeth: Now in Iowa, did you go see Field of Dreams, the actual cornfield I've never even seen the movie.
• 1:31
  Andrea Nunez: I know.
• 1:34
  Carmen Lezeth: Look, andrea is one of my best friends.
• 1:36
  Carmen Lezeth: I mean, when I say best friend, like I would die for her.
• 1:39
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, her children are my God children.
• 1:42
  Andrea Nunez: I'm sorry, I said, or kill her.
• 1:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Or kill her right or kill for you.
• 1:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Did I that's like, kill her or kill her right no, I would never kill you, but but, um, but there are just so many things like she's never seen the movie et and refuses to like she, just like now.
• 2:00
  Carmen Lezeth: It's like a thing.
• 2:02
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
• 2:02
  Andrea Nunez: Like and I'm like, yeah, there's a certain point where it's like, okay, well, that's my thing, I'm just not gonna watch it, I did almost watch it actually a few months ago, and then I was like no you don't do that.
• 2:17
  Carmen Lezeth: No, you know, I I still think it's something I'm I need you to watch, but whatever there.
• 2:22
  Carmen Lezeth: So field, field of Dreams, rick, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
• 2:25
  Carmen Lezeth: Not going to happen, it's not going to happen, never, no, I will never watch it.
• 2:28
  Carmen Lezeth: She won't do it.
• 2:29
  Andrea Nunez: So I know like roughly like the build it and they will whatever it is.
• 2:33
  Carmen Lezeth: But look at Rick's face.
• 2:36
  Carmen Lezeth: He's like, oh my God, I hate this woman.
• 2:38
  Andrea Nunez: And she will be invited back.
• 2:52
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm like like build it and he will come.
• 2:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Everybody's wait a minute, rick it's.
• 2:54
  Carmen Lezeth: Oh, wow, wait, you took it as a religious thing.
• 2:56
  Carmen Lezeth: Oh, no, no, not, no, I'm not talking about jesus.
• 2:57
  Rick Costa: Oh okay, I was like no, he did it, did he just make his builder and he will come.
• 3:01
  Rick Costa: It never was day, everybody they.
• 3:02
  Rick Costa: But it's not they, it's he.
• 3:04
  Andrea Nunez: Don't the ghosts walk out onto the field.
• 3:08
  Andrea Nunez: Spoiler alert.
• 3:09
  Carmen Lezeth: Andrea, I had this film professor who I hate, frank Manchel.
• 3:15
  Carmen Lezeth: Everyone knows I hate him, university of Vermont, I hate him, always hated him.
• 3:19
  Carmen Lezeth: But if you didn't get the gist but one of the things that I will say, that that that he mentioned I won't say taught me, cause I know I would have learned it somewhere else I will not give him that credit, but he did say it.
• 3:31
  Carmen Lezeth: He said never talk about a film you've never seen.
• 3:34
  Carmen Lezeth: Just don't do it.
• 3:36
  Carmen Lezeth: It doesn't matter if you've seen all the clips to whatever, and you will never hear me talk about a movie I've never seen, don't matter what clips I've seen, because until you see the full context, you don't know what you're talking about.
• 3:46
  Carmen Lezeth: But yeah, but, rick, I'm just telling you, this is my.
• 3:49
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't know what we have in common.
• 3:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Because she doesn't it's like almost on purpose, she will not watch anything.
• 3:57
  Andrea Nunez: I ask her to watch.
• 3:58
  Andrea Nunez: Unlike you, that's not true.
• 4:01
  Andrea Nunez: Okay, what's next?
• 4:06
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying I don't think you've ever watched anything I asked you to watch I watched moonlight but I don't even know what moonlight is what's moonlight wait?
• 4:17
  Andrea Nunez: is that the one that won the oscar?
• 4:19
  Andrea Nunez: Did it win the oscar?
• 4:22
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm sure you didn't watch it because I told you to, because I don't even remember the movie.
• 4:27
  Andrea Nunez: We'll have to talk about this offline, but you did.
• 4:29
  Andrea Nunez: You gave me the movie which I still have, wait wait, wait.
• 4:35
  Carmen Lezeth: I did what.
• 4:36
  Carmen Lezeth: I sent you the movie.
• 4:37
  Carmen Lezeth: You gave me the.
• 4:39
  Carmen Lezeth: No, I did not DVD.
• 4:41
  Carmen Lezeth: I bought you the DVD.
• 4:45
  Carmen Lezeth: Yes, I sent it to you Exactly.
• 4:47
  Andrea Nunez: That seems more likely.
• 4:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay.
• 4:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Well, we'll talk later, because there are a lot of things that you don't do, that get on my nerves.
• 4:58
  Carmen Lezeth: No, I'm just kidding.
• 5:00
  Rick Costa: But I am curious, if I may ask.
• 5:02
  Andrea Nunez: Well, why is this turning into?
• 5:03
  Andrea Nunez: Why did I show up tonight?
• 5:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Rick, what do you want to know?
• 5:08
  Rick Costa: I'm just curious, if I may ask specifically not, I don't care about ET.
• 5:12
  Rick Costa: I've seen ET, though Fear the Dreams.
• 5:15
  Rick Costa: What do you not?
• 5:17
  Rick Costa: Why do you not want to see it?
• 5:18
  Andrea Nunez: I despise Kevin Costner.
• 5:20
  Andrea Nunez: I will not watch it.
• 5:21
  Rick Costa: Oh, okay, there you go Now I understand.
• 5:22
  Andrea Nunez: Okay, I really love the movie no Way Out, but it's sort of in spite of him.
• 5:29
  Carmen Lezeth: One of the best movies ever have you ever seen?
• 5:32
  Carmen Lezeth: No Way Out.
• 5:33
  Carmen Lezeth: Rick Costa.
• 5:33
  Carmen Lezeth: What's it?
• 5:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Kevin Costa?
• 5:36
  Carmen Lezeth: It's one of his first early movies.
• 5:38
  Carmen Lezeth: Really good movie, Sean.
• 5:40
  Andrea Nunez: What's her name?
• 5:41
  Andrea Nunez: Sean, what's her name?
• 5:41
  Andrea Nunez: What was her name?
• 5:42
  Andrea Nunez: What's her name?
• 5:43
  Andrea Nunez: I forget her name.
• 5:44
  Andrea Nunez: Oh yeah, I can't remember her name Anyway.
• 5:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, you know what I can take or leave.
• 5:50
  Carmen Lezeth: Kevin Costner, like, it's not Like the reason why I saw Field of Dreams the first time.
• 5:56
  Carmen Lezeth: Because there's always a reason, right, it's because James Earl Jones is in it and James Earl Jones has always been one of my heroes.
• 6:03
  Carmen Lezeth: So of course I was going to watch every movie, every play I could get my you know hands on, cause I couldn't go to Broadway to see him or whatever.
• 6:11
  Carmen Lezeth: But James Earl Jones is in the movie and that was the reason why I had to see it.
• 6:14
  Carmen Lezeth: And then I was so glad because it's not about baseball, like, and, and that's kind of the cool thing about it.
• 6:21
  Carmen Lezeth: But yeah, that's kind of the cool thing about it.
• 6:22
  Carmen Lezeth: But yeah, you know what, andrea, again, I'm not going to.
• 6:23
  Carmen Lezeth: I know you're not going to see it, but field of dreams is great, not because of Kevin Costner, it's just a great story and it makes you think.
• 6:32
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
• 6:33
  Carmen Lezeth: That's it, um, but yeah, yeah, wow, okay, we can go.
• 6:38
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, thanks, tony, it is good advice.
• 6:40
  Carmen Lezeth: Don't talk about it, it is good.
• 6:42
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, you're right, and I and I put that on everything don't talk about a book you've never seen.
• 6:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Don't talk about a person you've never met, don't you know what I mean?
• 6:50
  Carmen Lezeth: Like, it makes it really simple to not get yourself all twisted.
• 6:54
  Carmen Lezeth: Uh, if you've not experienced that, cynthia, I'm so bummed about your interwebs.
• 6:59
  Carmen Lezeth: I thought I was gonna see her tonight.
• 7:04
  Carmen Lezeth: I know it's the only reason why you came and jumped in Cause.
• 7:07
  Carmen Lezeth: I said, rick, I'm a log off, you can deal with this.
• 7:15
  Carmen Lezeth: So, rick, what was it about?
• 7:18
  Carmen Lezeth: Um Chris Hemsworth show?
• 7:20
  Carmen Lezeth: I mean, besides the fact you said the last episode, look at it's.
• 7:24
  Carmen Lezeth: It's pretty well known what happened.
• 7:26
  Carmen Lezeth: Oh wait, let me read what Kevin said.
• 7:28
  Carmen Lezeth: I find a lot of people that don't watch movies Don't enjoy the fantasy part of it.
• 7:32
  Carmen Lezeth: I think Andrea watches a lot of movies.
• 7:36
  Carmen Lezeth: She just doesn't watch the movies I watch.
• 7:38
  Carmen Lezeth: But I hear you, I agree with you.
• 7:41
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm just defending you here, andrea, because, yes, I watched a lot of different tastes what we have, different things that we like yeah, and even when it comes to like men, we have very different tastes, but we always thought that was a plus in our relationship because, yeah, yeah rick is like how we going here.
• 8:01
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm like I'm just throwing.
• 8:02
  Carmen Lezeth: This is an analysis of friendship.
• 8:05
  Carmen Lezeth: Is what I'm saying?
• 8:06
  Carmen Lezeth: I forgot what I was talking about before.
• 8:09
  Rick Costa: Well, I was going to say this show Limitless with Chris Helmsworth.
• 8:12
  Rick Costa: This is one that I would say everybody should watch.
• 8:16
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, everybody should watch it.
• 8:17
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, it's something that I would watch.
• 8:20
  Andrea Nunez: I just haven't gotten to it yet.
• 8:21
  Carmen Lezeth: Like I've seen the we just showed the trailer.
• 8:25
  Carmen Lezeth: We just showed it on here.
• 8:28
  Ted Hicks: Yeah and don't necessarily trust the reviews either.
• 8:34
  Rick Costa: Tony, in general I mean.
• 8:35
  Andrea Nunez: I don't think I've ever gone to see a movie because of the reviews, or even read reviews before I went to go.
• 8:40
  Andrea Nunez: Usually that's the kind of stuff I look at after I see.
• 8:45
  Carmen Lezeth: I, you know.
• 8:46
  Carmen Lezeth: For me, I'll be honest with you there's very few people who I pay attention to but know me well enough.
• 8:52
  Carmen Lezeth: One of them is Mia, my other best friend, my first best friend.
• 8:58
  Carmen Lezeth: No, but Mia is the really, hands down, the only person that knows me well enough knows what movies I would like and don't like Like.
• 9:08
  Carmen Lezeth: So if she says, yeah, go see this movie, I'll go see it.
• 9:10
  Carmen Lezeth: If she says, don't go see this movie, I'll still go see the movie and then be like, damn it, she was right, because she kind of knows what I like and don't like, but reviews, like of regular critics.
• 9:22
  Carmen Lezeth: I came out to Los Angeles to be a critic, to be a film critic, which is weird.
• 9:26
  Carmen Lezeth: And then I was like you didn't know that.
• 9:29
  Carmen Lezeth: I studied film and English in college and I wanted to be like Pauline Kael who, by the way, is a bitch of a film critic in the academic world Sorry, may she rest in peace but brilliant, brilliant.
• 9:44
  Carmen Lezeth: But she was always tearing apart every movie.
• 9:48
  Carmen Lezeth: But I was like, well, I can't dance anymore, I can't perform anymore, what else could I do?
• 9:54
  Carmen Lezeth: And so I wanted to be a film critic and I loved, like Roger Ebert and them were just coming on, the whole kind of, and I was like I didn't want to do the thumbs up and thumbs down crap, but I was like I could totally I thought of it as you go to the movies, tell people about it and get paid.
• 10:11
  Carmen Lezeth: Here's what I liked, here's what I didn't like.
• 10:13
  Carmen Lezeth: I think you should go two steps up and around the world.
• 10:16
  Carmen Lezeth: We still have to give some love to.
• 10:24
  Carmen Lezeth: Jamie Foxx is still in the hospital, so love to him.
• 10:28
  Carmen Lezeth: And all the bullshit everyone's talking about that he had a stroke, that he had a heart attack, that he is all lies, lies, lies, lies.
• 10:35
  Carmen Lezeth: We don't know, but we praying on him, uh, to get better soon.
• 10:39
  Andrea Nunez: Yeah, siskel and eber, yeah, um I am fascinated that I did not know that, like I thought, you came out to act.
• 10:48
  Andrea Nunez: You know who knew that.
• 10:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Mia, wait, wait, wait, and Richard, oh, hell, no, okay, wait, you got to tell the story of Richard and I'm out.
• 11:02
  Carmen Lezeth: You got to tell the story of Richard because that's a good one.
• 11:07
  Carmen Lezeth: I want to hear it from your perspective.
• 11:10
  Andrea Nunez: Oh man, do we have to do all of this?
• 11:12
  Andrea Nunez: Okay, so yeah, it's funny, dude.
• 11:14
  Andrea Nunez: Carmen was having a birthday, like a milestone birthday.
• 11:22
  Andrea Nunez: I think I was turning 40.
• 11:24
  Andrea Nunez: It was when I lived in DC, right yeah?
• 11:27
  Carmen Lezeth: You were in Europe, but you seem to always leave that out of the story.
• 11:31
  Carmen Lezeth: You were living in Europe at the time, andrea.
• 11:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I'm gonna friends, richard, you know God rest his soul, truly, really great guy.
• 11:57
  Andrea Nunez: But so they're putting together.
• 12:01
  Andrea Nunez: I don't know.
• 12:02
  Andrea Nunez: I guess it was a surprise party.
• 12:04
  Andrea Nunez: I don't know.
• 12:05
  Andrea Nunez: Was it a surprise?
• 12:06
  Andrea Nunez: I don't know, I didn't know anything about.
• 12:08
  Carmen Lezeth: Why are you asking?
• 12:09
  Carmen Lezeth: If it was a surprise party, you can find you what happened.
• 12:11
  Carmen Lezeth: What happened?
• 12:12
  Carmen Lezeth: How are you?
• 12:13
  Andrea Nunez: asking if it was a surprise party.
• 12:14
  Andrea Nunez: You can find you what happened would have happened.
• 12:16
  Andrea Nunez: How are you asking this question?
• 12:16
  Andrea Nunez: Anyway, I just I'm trying to.
• 12:17
  Andrea Nunez: You know, I don't normally tell the story you normally tell.
• 12:20
  Andrea Nunez: So, anyway, I wasn't there, so I can't tell the whole story anyway.
• 12:23
  Andrea Nunez: So a bunch of people, a bunch of carmen's friends, friends were invited to a dinner to celebrate her birthday.
• 12:34
  Andrea Nunez: Elaborate everyone that was there, but I know two people, specifically included our former boss, who I'm not really sure fits in the friend category, and number two, my former roommate, who was not a friend, was not a friend of me.
• 12:59
  Andrea Nunez: I didn't even know about this.
• 13:04
  Andrea Nunez: Can I swear?
• 13:06
  Andrea Nunez: Can I swear?
• 13:07
  Andrea Nunez: Yes, okay, this motherfucking party.
• 13:11
  Andrea Nunez: So after the fact, and my freaking former roommate is invited, I don't even know it's happening.
• 13:20
  Andrea Nunez: Look, I'm gonna start crying.
• 13:21
  Andrea Nunez: Fucking shit, I'm still picked, I don't.
• 13:25
  Andrea Nunez: We won't say how long ago.
• 13:26
  Andrea Nunez: It was three, four years ago, yeah but a long time ago, but wait.
• 13:33
  Andrea Nunez: I will never.
• 13:34
  Andrea Nunez: I will never have closure.
• 13:35
  Andrea Nunez: Obviously she was, so I'm still pretty pissed off about it and every time it comes up I feel it welling okay, so I just have to clean up a piece of this.
• 13:48
  Carmen Lezeth: So they had a surprise party for me at a, at one of my favorite restaurants, and this was a planned out, like a long winded planned out thing, cause you have to book this place and whatever, and Richard, may he rest in peace Cause he has passed away.
• 14:05
  Carmen Lezeth: Um, he tried to.
• 14:09
  Carmen Lezeth: Like all of my friends don't know each other in person, like you know what I mean, like I'm sure you have friends, Rick, that know of each other but they don't know each other in person.
• 14:19
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
• 14:19
  Carmen Lezeth: So Richard did his due diligence and I, the more I think about it, the more I think that he called probably one of my assistants at the time Because, remember, I was over at brand new school and they tried to coordinate it and people flew in like Mia flew, like this wasn't a small like party.
• 14:42
  Andrea Nunez: This was a big deal.
• 14:43
  Andrea Nunez: Someone else could have had she known about it.
• 14:49
  Carmen Lezeth: I know, I know and I'm just saying, but it was just, it was hilarious Cause she was so angry for so long.
• 14:55
  Andrea Nunez: I'm thinking about the years and I swear it was when I was in DC.
• 14:59
  Andrea Nunez: I was not in DC, you were in.
• 15:02
  Carmen Lezeth: Europe.
• 15:02
  Andrea Nunez: I know you were Cause we're going to talk about this later, but I'm telling you, because that's what I thought.
• 15:08
  Carmen Lezeth: you weren't there.
• 15:08
  Carmen Lezeth: I was like, well, of course she's not going to fly in from Europe for my little birthday party.
• 15:12
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what I thought.
• 15:13
  Carmen Lezeth: But, rick, the best part is the pictures.
• 15:17
  Carmen Lezeth: It's like me and our boss, me and her roommate.
• 15:21
  Carmen Lezeth: I took pictures of everybody.
• 15:26
  Carmen Lezeth: It was so wrong, it was so wrong.
• 15:31
  Andrea Nunez: I don't even remember why we're talking now.
• 15:32
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm all like, all right, I gotta go no, no, because we're talking about field of dreams and friendship.
• 15:36
  Carmen Lezeth: And how little you know about how, why I came out here.
• 15:39
  Carmen Lezeth: You didn't know that I yeah anyway.
• 15:43
  Andrea Nunez: No wonder I wasn't invited to the party.
• 15:45
  Andrea Nunez: I didn't know you were going to be a film credit.
• 15:46
  Andrea Nunez: There we go.
• 15:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Mystery solved, yeah, mystery solved, um, we go Mystery solved, yeah, mystery solved, um, all right, well, I couldn't show it.
• 15:58
  Carmen Lezeth: You know this is also part of those things.
• 16:00
  Carmen Lezeth: But anyway, basically what he's saying, and he says it's in such a funny way, but he he talks about like, if you're my best friend, you should know that I can use you in a lie if I need to right.
• 16:15
  Carmen Lezeth: Like he's basically saying if I look at you, you know I'm in trouble.
• 16:18
  Carmen Lezeth: We should be so connected that you gonna lie for me.
• 16:23
  Carmen Lezeth: There's not much else I need to do because we're best friends.
• 16:26
  Carmen Lezeth: And he says your bullshit is my bullshit and my bullshit is your.
• 16:30
  Carmen Lezeth: And of course it's Chris Hart, I mean Kevin Hart, so he's brilliantly funny about it.
• 16:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Ok, so I I sent that to Andrea.
• 16:38
  Carmen Lezeth: So my question is how far would you go to defend a friend?
• 16:45
  Carmen Lezeth: How far would you go to defend a friend?
• 16:49
  Ted Hicks: Now.
• 16:49
  Carmen Lezeth: I'll tell you back when the OJ Simpson thing happened, when he murdered his wife and Ron Goldman his ex-wife and Ron Goldman, because that's what I believe happened I was talking to Mia and I remember having this conversation with her and I said even if all of the evidence was against you, even if they could prove that it was you that you murdered somebody, I'd be there for you, I would believe you, I would fight to the end, I would make sure that we would find a way to acquit you.
• 17:22
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what I said.
• 17:24
  Carmen Lezeth: Now that I'm older and she has children and a husband, I don't know if you have all the evidence against you how far I would go.
• 17:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying I don't know.
• 17:35
  Carmen Lezeth: I would be there for you as a friend forever, but I don't know.
• 17:40
  Carmen Lezeth: Andrea thoughts.
• 17:43
  Andrea Nunez: My initial thought before you brought that up was like I'd go all the way up to the edge of where it hurts somebody else, like a third party, like really hurts them in some way.
• 17:56
  Andrea Nunez: It depends, maybe, on what that third party has done okay, gray area there maybe gray area.
• 18:10
  Andrea Nunez: That's my initial thought, joyce.
• 18:16
  Joy Gouge: I think it kind of would depend on the situation though, because you know, if I've got a friend out there that's like you know, killing her husband or something you know, I just don't know.
• 18:30
  Joy Gouge: You know I did something.
• 18:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so what I'm hearing is I can't rely on you, joy, for anything.
• 18:38
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay.
• 18:40
  Joy Gouge: Now, when it comes to someone's health or well-being, you know I will support you as a friend, but I will not back up that lie or that deception or that very hurtful thing that they were doing to their husband.
• 19:07
  Joy Gouge: Okay, you know I'm not going gonna support you hurting somebody else, physically hurting somebody else right, all I but.
• 19:18
  Carmen Lezeth: But then I'm gonna step in because andrea made a good point.
• 19:19
  Carmen Lezeth: Depends on who the third party is like.
• 19:22
  Carmen Lezeth: I I don't know.
• 19:24
  Carmen Lezeth: I mean I hear you.
• 19:25
  Carmen Lezeth: So ash just said I'm bad for being all in, but I would hope the friend would respect my morals and how it would affect me by doing so.
• 19:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Don't worry, joy, I got the shovel.
• 19:39
  Joy Gouge: All right, I've got you on speed dial.
• 19:43
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: I've got you on speed dial.
• 19:43
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I don't know, rick, thoughts or Joy, you were going to say something.
• 19:49
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm sorry, no, no, oh, rick, go ahead.
• 19:53
  Rick Costa: I'll do what I can humanly possible for you if I really love you.
• 19:55
  Rick Costa: You're my friend and everything.
• 19:56
  Rick Costa: But I'm not gonna lie, though I'm not gonna lie like wow oh yeah, I just saw this video because, of course, my mom has dementia and so I watch a lot of videos on youtube about dementia and they.
• 20:09
  Rick Costa: This video caught my attention was like lying and dementia, and of course they're seeing things that aren't there.
• 20:15
  Rick Costa: And they're hearing things that aren't there and so the woman's like you don't want to lie, but here's the thing.
• 20:21
  Rick Costa: They really see it.
• 20:24
  Joy Gouge: Yeah.
• 20:25
  Rick Costa: Making it up.
• 20:25
  Rick Costa: So it's not like they're.
• 20:27
  Rick Costa: They're not lying.
• 20:28
  Rick Costa: They're actually seeing what they see.
• 20:29
  Rick Costa: So when you tell them, no, that's not there, they think you're not lying.
• 20:31
  Rick Costa: They're actually seeing what they see.
• 20:32
  Rick Costa: So when you tell them, no, that's not there, they think you're the one that's lying right so now I'm like what do I do?
• 20:40
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm lying is okay.
• 20:41
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm kind of done with this.
• 20:43
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm I'm tired of being goody two-shoes about everything.
• 20:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, it is all about the hate today.
• 20:50
  Carmen Lezeth: Let me tell you Clearly all about the honesty.
• 20:57
  Carmen Lezeth: I just.
• 20:59
  Carmen Lezeth: I think sometimes, okay, wait, asher said oh, I've totally lied for a friend.
• 21:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Exactly, I've lied for friends easily, like, easily, easily, no problem.
• 21:12
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't think it's always so black and white and there are gray areas.
• 21:17
  Carmen Lezeth: Now, if somebody murdered somebody, that's a different ballgame.
• 21:22
  Carmen Lezeth: But if somebody was accused of murdering, like, I cannot imagine I'm going to just say it straight up If Andrea was accused of murdering somebody, I mean it's going to take way more than just evidence for me to believe that that's true, because I know her so well that I would.
• 21:39
  Carmen Lezeth: It would be so hard for me to be like you know what girl?
• 21:43
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm sorry, I'll come visit you in jail, like, but it seems like you did it.
• 21:48
  Carmen Lezeth: You know and I know who she might murder.
• 21:51
  Carmen Lezeth: She might murder.
• 21:52
  Carmen Lezeth: So I even know.
• 21:53
  Carmen Lezeth: So a part of me would still find it.
• 21:56
  Carmen Lezeth: It would just it would rock my whole sense of understanding who she is and the world.
• 22:03
  Carmen Lezeth: For that's why I'm saying I think I'd be there for her no matter what, even at quick, because I would think that the system did her wrong.
• 22:14
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean, and I would have to find out why.
• 22:19
  Andrea Nunez: Well, and I would say just, you know, I think that I believe that none of my friends who I would lie for there are some I have that I would definitely not lie for, but none of my friends who I would lie for, uh, would ask me to step over a line.
• 22:39
  Andrea Nunez: That's right.
• 22:40
  Andrea Nunez: I like, like you were saying that about me, like I um, there's a certain point where I wouldn't do that to them.
• 22:48
  Andrea Nunez: You know, I may have done it, done whatever to somebody else that would.
• 22:52
  Andrea Nunez: I would say I want you to lie for me, but I like I wouldn't ask them to do that to me because of what it would do to them.
• 23:00
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
• 23:00
  Carmen Lezeth: I just got totally confused.
• 23:01
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I didn't hear anything in there.
• 23:04
  Carmen Lezeth: Like Carmen, I would do the same for you.
• 23:05
  Carmen Lezeth: That's what I was waiting for.
• 23:07
  Carmen Lezeth: I didn't hear that at all.
• 23:08
  Andrea Nunez: but okay, whatever, like I wouldn't ask you to lie for me.
• 23:15
  Carmen Lezeth: But that's exactly.
• 23:16
  Carmen Lezeth: But of course not.
• 23:17
  Carmen Lezeth: But that's my whole point.
• 23:27
  Andrea Nunez: If you were accused of murder, murdering somebody, I know you would not, that you would ever murder anybody, but I'm saying I know people that would.
• 23:30
  Andrea Nunez: Are you on that list that you have of people you want to kill, if that person is?
• 23:32
  Carmen Lezeth: in that list.
• 23:33
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah right, I'm just saying like, let's just pretend, pretend right, that you were accused of murdering somebody.
• 23:40
  Carmen Lezeth: I would know in my heart, in my entire being, it was not you.
• 23:43
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, yeah, you wouldn't even have to ask me.
• 23:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I would try to figure out what the problem is.
• 23:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Does that make sense?
• 23:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay?
• 23:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, again, not hearing that you would do the same for me, but whatever, I'm just kidding.
• 23:55
  Andrea Nunez: I just said same.
• 24:01
  Rick Costa: Does this change anything?
• 24:02
  Rick Costa: What if you?
• 24:03
  Rick Costa: By lying, you get into trouble legally Me, Whoever.
• 24:10
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't care.
• 24:13
  Carmen Lezeth: I would rather go down fighting because I think but okay, that's a great point, because here's the thing.
• 24:19
  Carmen Lezeth: Isn't that the problem with our country right now?
• 24:22
  Carmen Lezeth: We're so self-absorbed about what's going to happen to me, we don't care so much about what's happening to other people.
• 24:31
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm not trying to throw that out there, but that's exactly the point.
• 24:34
  Carmen Lezeth: If I know someone who is innocent is going to jail for something they didn't do, and it's somebody I love and care about, I mean, andrea said it earlier, it's no joke.
• 24:45
  Carmen Lezeth: If you in my corner, I got you, I got you.
• 24:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, this is not going to be.
• 24:55
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm a loyal, loyal friend.
• 24:58
  Carmen Lezeth: You fuck with me and it's over.
• 25:00
  Carmen Lezeth: That's a different ballgame.
• 25:01
  Carmen Lezeth: That's a different, and Andrea knows this.
• 25:04
  Carmen Lezeth: I have a three strikes rule.
• 25:06
  Carmen Lezeth: All of my friends know this.
• 25:10
  Carmen Lezeth: You have to do three major mess-ups like major mess-ups to not be my friend anymore.
• 25:18
  Andrea Nunez: I'm just wondering how many strikes I have right now.
• 25:24
  Rick Costa: Going back to the beginning, you said this is a lie.
• 25:27
  Rick Costa: So would you go to jail knowing you just told a lie to help somebody out, when you they probably didn't do it?
• 25:36
  Carmen Lezeth: okay, I don't know what you mean.
• 25:37
  Carmen Lezeth: I got confused.
• 25:38
  Carmen Lezeth: Now what?
• 25:39
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let's go with andrea just murdered somebody, okay, and then what am I doing?
• 25:44
  Andrea Nunez: I know cynthia's like laughing cynthia, I would ask you, can it be?
• 25:47
  Carmen Lezeth: somebody else.
• 25:48
  Carmen Lezeth: No, because we just just chit-chatting.
• 25:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, wait, let's read ash.
• 25:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, wait.
• 25:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Ash said oh, I've totally lied for a friend.
• 25:55
  Carmen Lezeth: Laugh out loud.
• 25:57
  Carmen Lezeth: Exactly.
• 25:57
  Carmen Lezeth: You'd be wondering why andrea didn't call you for help.
• 26:00
  Carmen Lezeth: That's true.
• 26:00
  Carmen Lezeth: If I went down defending a friend who was in the right, I'd happily go down with them.
• 26:05
  Carmen Lezeth: That's right, go ahead.
• 26:07
  Rick Costa: But rick, give me your example.
• 26:08
  Carmen Lezeth: They were in the wrong but but if Andrea murdered somebody, why, if, if, if my best friend, one of my best friends, murdered somebody and they, they would tell me.
• 26:27
  Carmen Lezeth: First of all, they would tell me I don't need to defend that that's.
• 26:30
  Carmen Lezeth: That's a whole different situation they're going to.
• 26:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't have people in my life that wouldn't fess up to me.
• 26:37
  Carmen Lezeth: So I'm not lying for somebody.
• 26:41
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm saying if she was accused of murdering somebody and I knew that she didn't do it, or I trusted that she told me she didn't do it, I would believe her.
• 26:51
  Joy Gouge: Yeah, I got that, I'm just saying I'm throwing a monkey wrench at you, that's a little different.
• 26:58
  Carmen Lezeth: That's not one of my friends.
• 27:00
  Rick Costa: I'm just saying the monkey wrench is she lied.
• 27:03
  Rick Costa: They are lying and now you're sitting in jail knowing that it's not even true.
• 27:10
  Rick Costa: You're here for a lie.
• 27:12
  Carmen Lezeth: First of all, carmen ain't going to be sitting in no jail.
• 27:14
  Carmen Lezeth: Let's just be clear about that.
• 27:16
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, number one because?
• 27:17
  Carmen Lezeth: Because I got some good ass motherfucking lawyers in my life, okay, yeah, just to start right now.
• 27:23
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, wait a minute.
• 27:24
  Carmen Lezeth: Here's the problem with that scenario.
• 27:25
  Carmen Lezeth: Andrea wouldn't lie to me.
• 27:29
  Carmen Lezeth: You're saying that somebody I consider my best friend, like part of my life, would lie to me and I would know they were lying and then I would go to jail for them.
• 27:40
  Carmen Lezeth: That doesn't make no sense.
• 27:43
  Rick Costa: Let's say, andrea stole a million dollars from a company and she's like I'm definitely going to get away with it, carmen, don't tell nobody.
• 27:49
  Rick Costa: Okay, don't tell nobody, she gets caught.
• 27:51
  Rick Costa: And then they say, carmen, did you have knowledge of this?
• 27:55
  Rick Costa: It's either no, or you're gonna lie, and you know.
• 28:02
  Carmen Lezeth: lie or not lie, you know am I with andrea in the other country that we've flown to where there's no we are having fruity drinks on the beach right now, right.
• 28:17
  Carmen Lezeth: The problem with your scenario is that Andrea, upon stealing the million dollars, would have already charted the jet that we were both.
• 28:29
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying like I would probably have known about the million dollar heist, because my friends wouldn't do something like that without telling me and including me in and me being go ahead, go ahead girl, so you would be the accomplice.
• 28:47
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Yeah, I have no.
• 28:47
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Who?
• 28:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Cynthia, look at, here's the thing too.
• 28:55
  Carmen Lezeth: Andrea would steal the million dollars from the same place.
• 28:58
  Carmen Lezeth: I would right, girl, we're not gonna steal from people who need it, we're gonna steal from people who don't need it, and I'm screwing people, so we would have robin hood robin hood yeah, yeah, we've gone down a hood.
• 29:13
  Andrea Nunez: I missed one, I'm confused.
• 29:20
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't know what my love language is.
• 29:23
  Carmen Lezeth: Is that in all?
• 29:26
  Andrea Nunez: relationships.
• 29:27
  Andrea Nunez: Well, that's the theory.
• 29:28
  Andrea Nunez: Or just men?
• 29:29
  Andrea Nunez: All people live and receive love in a certain way, and so it's your job to know what your partner's love language is, so that you can communicate with them in that way.
• 29:40
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Okay, Andrea.
• 29:44
  Carmen Lezeth: Go ahead, andrea.
• 29:47
  Carmen Lezeth: What's your love language girl?
• 29:51
  Andrea Nunez: Acts of service.
• 29:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Do nice things for me uh, acts of service do nice things for me, so do they.
• 29:59
  Carmen Lezeth: So that means you.
• 30:00
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I just want to learn.
• 30:00
  Carmen Lezeth: So you're saying, if somebody does nice things for you, then you love them, they love you it's showing their love like that.
• 30:07
  Andrea Nunez: Yeah, that's how I like someone to show their love for me and how I show my love for other people, like cooking, right, that's doing a nice thing for people.
• 30:18
  Andrea Nunez: I do that for people.
• 30:18
  Andrea Nunez: You know, that's a love language for me and it's I'm just saying.
• 30:22
  Carmen Lezeth: I have not felt that kind of love from you in a very long time.
• 30:24
  Carmen Lezeth: I have not felt the love language of cooking in my house and leaving me food for a couple weeks and just friendship.
• 30:33
  Carmen Lezeth: Of our love language is confusion, I think Okay.
• 30:38
  Andrea Nunez: I hear what you're saying.
• 30:40
  Andrea Nunez: Well, I don't know what your love language is.
• 30:42
  Andrea Nunez: You have to.
• 30:43
  Carmen Lezeth: I've never thought of such a thing I have.
• 30:45
  Carmen Lezeth: No, I really don't.
• 30:46
  Carmen Lezeth: I've never.
• 30:48
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't know what my love language is.
• 30:52
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Well, if you were in a relationship, or in any any relationship, how would you want someone to show you that they love you or appreciate you?
• 31:00
  Andrea Nunez: how do you know like what makes you feel loved?
• 31:07
  Carmen Lezeth: I think there's a reason why I am definitely single right now.
• 31:10
  Carmen Lezeth: Is this the answer?
• 31:14
  Carmen Lezeth: Is this what I've been missing the whole time?
• 31:17
  Andrea Nunez: You're like I have no language.
• 31:19
  Andrea Nunez: I don't know, she's not young or old hey Michael.
• 31:32
  Carmen Lezeth: I think we now know the secret.
• 31:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't know.
• 31:37
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm so confused.
• 31:38
  Carmen Lezeth: I think Rick is trying to tell me I'm having so much fun I'm going to have to try to ignore him for a bit.
• 31:46
  Carmen Lezeth: Oh, here he is.
• 31:49
  Carmen Lezeth: Wait a minute, here he is.
• 31:49
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, wait, we're going to bring Rick on.
• 31:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Rick, you're missing it.
• 31:52
  Carmen Lezeth: Ciao, sorry.
• 31:54
  Carmen Lezeth: We've now determined that the reason why I am single all this time is because I don't know what my love language is.
• 32:03
  Carmen Lezeth: I know I'm like that's the answer.
• 32:07
  Carmen Lezeth: All right, give me the options again and I'll tell you what I think I might want.
• 32:11
  Carmen Lezeth: It is so material.
• 32:12
  Carmen Lezeth: It's clearly not material stuff that doesn't matter.
• 32:15
  Andrea Nunez: Gifts is one of them, right, Isn't that material?
• 32:19
  Andrea Nunez: Yeah?
• 32:20
  Carmen Lezeth: but you know, that's not really my thing.
• 32:23
  Andrea Nunez: I'm asking you guys Gifts is one of them, Words of affection or some you know.
• 32:29
  Rick Costa: Affirmation.
• 32:30
  Andrea Nunez: Yes, thank you.
• 32:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Wait, wait, so wait.
• 32:36
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm confused.
• 32:36
  Carmen Lezeth: So you mean somebody tells me you're awesome and that's going to make me love them?
• 32:39
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm confused.
• 32:42
  Andrea Nunez: It's not about making you love them.
• 32:44
  Andrea Nunez: It's not like some voodoo shit where there's a hooking in the hole and say she's awesome, she's all in love with me.
• 32:56
  Carmen Lezeth: She's awesome.
• 32:57
  Carmen Lezeth: Hey, joy.
• 32:58
  Carmen Lezeth: Just so you know.
• 32:59
  Carmen Lezeth: Michael wrote a few joy.
• 33:01
  Carmen Lezeth: He wrote in the comments oh, michael, michael backer, michael backer yeah, I'm sorry I forgot.
• 33:09
  Carmen Lezeth: Uh, rick is a great gift to all seekers of divine guidance.
• 33:15
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I'm still trying to figure out.
• 33:19
  Carmen Lezeth: Thank you.
• 33:20
  Ted Hicks: Okay, rick, just wrote.
• 33:21
  Carmen Lezeth: Rick just wrote words of affirmation quality time, physical touch, acts of service, receiving gifts.
• 33:27
  Carmen Lezeth: There you go.
• 33:28
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I think mine might be quality time.
• 33:30
  Carmen Lezeth: That's probably fair, right?
• 33:32
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I think so.
• 33:33
  Carmen Lezeth: I think that's probably me Like I don't need to see you, probably me like I don't need to see you every day.
• 33:37
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't even need you to live in my house, hint hint, have your own place.
• 33:41
  Carmen Lezeth: But I like, like, if we're gonna be together, we're gonna.
• 33:45
  Carmen Lezeth: I think that might be true.
• 33:46
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I'm not, because you know I'm by myself.
• 33:49
  Carmen Lezeth: Hey, ted Hicks, how you doing?
• 33:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay?
• 33:52
  Carmen Lezeth: He wrote wait a minute, I didn't get my chance to say it's ladies night.
• 33:56
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, we, we tried to knock him out, saying we were having technical difficulty, but he logged back on you know, um, okay um Cynthia Joy, joy, your turn, my goodness.
• 34:15
  Joy Gouge: I love the quality time.
• 34:16
  Joy Gouge: That quality time we're the same yeah.
• 34:23
  Carmen Lezeth: Quality time.
• 34:26
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Now takes its to all of us.
• 34:29
  Carmen Lezeth: After he said hi to Rick in a special thing, then he said hi to the rest of us.
• 34:34
  Carmen Lezeth: Cynthia was yours and Rick was yours.
• 34:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Rick in a special thing that he sent out of the restaurant, Like whatever, Cynthia was yours and Rick was yours.
• 34:39
  Carmen Lezeth: Oh, Rick, let's go with you first.
• 34:44
  Rick Costa: I would say probably quality time with a sprinkle of access service.
• 34:50
  Rick Costa: Like it's basically how do you feel loved when somebody does which one of these things?
• 34:57
  Rick Costa: So quality time, huge for me.
• 34:59
  Rick Costa: Like you want to spend time with me cool, that shows you love me.
• 35:02
  Rick Costa: You know I love that.
• 35:03
  Rick Costa: But then acts of service is like I'll do the dishes for you, whatever, I'll do this for you, you ain't got to do it.
• 35:10
  Carmen Lezeth: Really like that'll make me feel like oh wow oh, you know what, when you said acts of service, like when andrea was talking, she said because I was thinking like you know, you volunteer, you do.
• 35:20
  Carmen Lezeth: I still am confused by all of this I'm confusion I'm confusion.
• 35:26
  Andrea Nunez: Like you know, acts of service like rub your feet at the end of the day.
• 35:30
  Andrea Nunez: Gas up your car, do something you revise.
• 35:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I want to revise.
• 35:35
  Carmen Lezeth: I like people rubbing my feet she likes physical touch.
• 35:44
  Rick Costa: I want men to oh boy, this is rated.
• 35:52
  Rick Costa: G right, this is family friendly here's the thing.
• 35:57
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm in charge of the clips.
• 35:58
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, that's so funny.
• 36:04
  Carmen Lezeth: All right, I I think I'm getting it all right.
• 36:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Go ahead, cynthia.
• 36:07
  Carmen Lezeth: What's yours?
• 36:08
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: so mine would be um two of them.
• 36:10
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: So I have the quality of time and gifts, but not like huge gifts, like, for instance, like if somebody goes to a store and they know I love Disney let's give an example and they go to a store, they see something with Disney or something like that and they just thought of me and grabbed.
• 36:28
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: It could be a dollar, it could be 25 cents, doesn't even matter, just the point that they show that they thought of me and Pick something up for me, hiony, how you doing yeah um it doesn't mean being materialistic.
• 36:43
  Rick Costa: It means like somebody took the time to actually get you something and said, oh, I think this is gonna make their day, and then you did it right.
• 36:50
  Rick Costa: It's like, oh yeah, this is just romantic relationships.
• 36:54
  Carmen Lezeth: Right, not necessarily okay.
• 36:57
  Carmen Lezeth: So you guys were just messing with me, okay?
• 36:59
  Carmen Lezeth: Well, after this I'm gonna have to have like, I'm gonna have to write in my journal and be like this is what happened with this guy.
• 37:08
  Carmen Lezeth: I did not understand that he was trying trying to provide service.
• 37:16
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: And your love language might not be the same as your partner or as your friend.
• 37:21
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: It may be totally different.
• 37:22
  Carmen Lezeth: Well, clearly I wasn't even paying attention.
• 37:25
  Carmen Lezeth: So is that really a thing?
• 37:27
  Carmen Lezeth: I guess it's really a thing.
• 37:31
  Carmen Lezeth: Wow, this will be the last time we do turn the tables Thursday, because the host is feeling like a loser.
• 37:41
  Joy Gouge: No it's your therapy session.
• 37:42
  Joy Gouge: You're learning so much.
• 37:42
  Joy Gouge: It's your therapy session.
• 37:47
  Carmen Lezeth: It totally is.
• 37:48
  Carmen Lezeth: We're going to fix Carmen after all, yeah, after all.
• 37:59
  Brian McGauhey: Set in place to begin with, because if you set up a foundation, you set up boundaries.
• 38:01
  Brian McGauhey: You will have a good relationship.
• 38:03
  Brian McGauhey: From my observation, from everybody else I know and everybody else I've spoken to that have been married for X amount of years, my failed relationships has been financial, because it's my choosing of the type of jobs I wanted to go.
• 38:16
  Brian McGauhey: But I do the best of my ability.
• 38:18
  Brian McGauhey: You know the shit I mean.
• 38:22
  Brian McGauhey: But the thing about it is it's like hey, love you Rich, but hey, I mean you want to go for somebody else, you know that wants to flaunt and all that stuff.
• 38:31
  Brian McGauhey: Fine, go ahead, be that way.
• 38:32
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: But it's just like, hey, you know if they're only going after you for your money, right?
• 38:37
  Brian McGauhey: well, I mean yeah, but but also too.
• 38:39
  Brian McGauhey: But like, what annoys me from my past experience is just that, like I'd be there for him.
• 38:43
  Brian McGauhey: I'd be like yeah, what do you need?
• 38:44
  Brian McGauhey: I got you.
• 38:45
  Brian McGauhey: Would you need help with that?
• 38:46
  Brian McGauhey: I got you.
• 38:47
  Brian McGauhey: But the moment I run into a snag, oh bye, I gotta go.
• 38:51
  Brian McGauhey: It's not you, it's me kind of for you.
• 38:53
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: That's not the right person.
• 38:54
  Brian McGauhey: You can't do it right, I know, but, like I said, it's been like financial because it's like I run into a snag, but yet everything else I've done, I help them out.
• 39:03
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: So try not to help them out so much.
• 39:05
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Don't do what you can.
• 39:07
  Brian McGauhey: Don't overexert yourself trying to give them everything when they can't do the same to you, Right when they can't do the same to you, right, but I expect that reciprocated, like I was there for you in your time of need.
• 39:20
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: See, you needed to be on our last podcast with the love language, because your love language is not the same as the girls you've been finding.
• 39:28
  Brian McGauhey: Because I mean, like I could fix shit, I could cook shit, I mean I could do it.
• 39:36
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, brian, I you should talk to Cynthia later.
• 39:40
  Carmen Lezeth: She can get by.
• 39:46
  Brian McGauhey: I'm not hard to find.
• 39:46
  Brian McGauhey: It's all good, I'm not hard to find.
• 39:49
  Carmen Lezeth: Brian, I think you're just choosing the wrong people, or you're not choosing, but you're connecting and maybe falling for people and maybe you don't see the signs because, no, look at as much as I make fun of you and whatever we, we go back and forth.
• 40:02
  Carmen Lezeth: I know you're a good man and I know you can cook some shit.
• 40:06
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, that I'll give you some credit right there.
• 40:08
  Carmen Lezeth: I've seen you with the barbecue.
• 40:10
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, like I would go to texas just for that.
• 40:13
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so're a good person.
• 40:16
  Carmen Lezeth: You work hard.
• 40:17
  Carmen Lezeth: You need to find a person that connects on your level.
• 40:21
  Carmen Lezeth: You're not finding those right people.
• 40:25
  Andrea Nunez: That's what that's about.
• 40:26
  Andrea Nunez: It's important to know what you want in a relationship, what your own values are, so that you can kind of screen people for those values.
• 40:42
  Andrea Nunez: It doesn't mean they have to totally match up, but they can't be like in total conflict either.
• 40:48
  Rick Costa: Yeah, and one thing I'll say, too, is if you don't want me, then I don't want you, because why would I want you?
• 40:55
  Rick Costa: If you don't want me, then I don't want you, because why would I want you if you don't want me?
• 40:58
  Rick Costa: Sounds simple, but it's like.
• 41:00
  Andrea Nunez: that's the bottom line if you don't want me anymore, if someone doesn't want to be with you, they're not the right person.
• 41:06
  Ted Hicks: Boom done, there you go something that you guys had mentioned a couple of weeks ago and I responded to you, but it was at the end of your stream.
• 41:17
  Ted Hicks: Does your significant other need to be your best friend?
• 41:21
  Ted Hicks: I say no.
• 41:24
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Which is amazing.
• 41:25
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: They don't need to be, but it probably would help the relationship a little if they are one of your best friends.
• 41:32
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Okay, if they are one of your best friends.
• 41:35
  Ted Hicks: Okay, so I say no, but a comment that was used earlier.
• 41:45
  Ted Hicks: I think that person, that significant other, needs to be your ride or die.
• 41:50
  Mister B: Yeah.
• 41:51
  Ted Hicks: But they don't have to be your best friend.
• 41:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Can you tell me what ride or die is versus best friend?
• 41:56
  Ted Hicks: What does that, what's the difference or what does it mean, because I don't know what that means you know your significant other is your ride or die, meaning you can depend on them when needed, just as they would depend on you.
• 42:11
  Ted Hicks: But is that the?
• 42:12
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: same as a best friend.
• 42:13
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: A best friend, you would depend on them regardless of whatever.
• 42:19
  Brian McGauhey: They're close, they're close.
• 42:22
  Ted Hicks: They're very close.
• 42:25
  Mister B: One of my best friends is a little bit harder than your best friend, wouldn't your ride a title potentially become your best friend, though In this situation.
• 42:36
  Mister B: I'm just saying there's a little bit more to it.
• 42:39
  Mister B: I know You're from the Bronx.
• 42:41
  Mister B: You already know stuff.
• 42:42
  Mister B: I know, I know where Ted's going.
• 42:45
  Mister B: I know where Ted's going, all right, all right.
• 42:47
  Ted Hicks: Yeah.
• 42:47
  Mister B: I'm just saying, though, all right, I get it.
• 42:50
  Mister B: You know what I mean I'm, you know.
• 42:58
  Mister B: I mean I'm in a situation, you know.
• 42:58
  Mister B: I mean, uh, I'm falling and I can't get up.
• 43:00
  Mister B: I need, you know, I mean I need an upliftment here.
• 43:01
  Mister B: You go right?
• 43:01
  Mister B: Yeah, I got that all right, thank you.
• 43:02
  Mister B: You know what I mean.
• 43:03
  Mister B: But it's not just like you know, I mean compared to, well, your best friend, you know, we could talk, we could talk, we could do this.
• 43:16
  Mister B: There's a slight difference between the two.
• 43:19
  Mister B: I'm thinking about it.
• 43:20
  Mister B: There is a slight difference between the two.
• 43:22
  Mister B: I don't know what it is.
• 43:23
  Mister B: They'll potentially eventually become that same person if you put the time in.
• 43:29
  Mister B: Yeah, if the time is put in, they'll eventually become the same person.
• 43:36
  Carmen Lezeth: My ride or die.
• 43:37
  Carmen Lezeth: My best friends are my ride or die I don't have With no expiration date.
• 43:42
  Ted Hicks: There's no expiration date.
• 43:44
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't know what that was about, Brian.
• 43:45
  Carmen Lezeth: There's no expiration date.
• 43:48
  Mister B: To me a ride or die.
• 43:49
  Carmen Lezeth: Next week it's over.
• 43:51
  Carmen Lezeth: You're no longer married.
• 43:54
  Carmen Lezeth: It's expired.
• 43:55
  Carmen Lezeth: It's been 30 years.
• 43:57
  Rick Costa: To me a ride or die you could be stuck in a side road at two o'clock in the morning and they'll be there.
• 44:01
  Mister B: They'll be there, yeah.
• 44:02
  Rick Costa: My best friend will be like oh, I hate that for you oh come on, that's not your best friend.
• 44:10
  Mister B: Sometimes your best friend could pop up out of nowhere.
• 44:13
  Mister B: You know what I mean.
• 44:17
  Carmen Lezeth: I feel like we have to have individual therapy sessions.
• 44:19
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: I'm starting to feel like these men have had some really bad relationships, friends and partner-wise.
• 44:30
  Brian McGauhey: tony agrees yeah, carmen, what's going?
• 44:33
  Andrea Nunez: on with your friends and you're like what?
• 44:35
  Andrea Nunez: Yeah right on that okay, so carmen could call me from freaking thailand at 2 am and I'd be on a plane trying to figure out how to help her yeah yes, right, yes.
• 44:51
  Andrea Nunez: So, like you know, like, without even thinking, like, should I do this or not?
• 44:57
  Ted Hicks: it would just be automatic so I so andrea, I mean this andrea, but go ahead okay and I can't butcher cynthia.
• 45:12
  Ted Hicks: okay, so I have a couple of.
• 45:16
  Ted Hicks: I have a best friend.
• 45:18
  Ted Hicks: We've been friends for 40 plus years.
• 45:20
  Ted Hicks: We don't have to talk every day.
• 45:22
  Ted Hicks: We can get on the phone and just pick up from whenever.
• 45:29
  Ted Hicks: That to me is a definition of a best friend.
• 45:34
  Ted Hicks: If you're in need, or the example that was just given Now your ride or die is like, hey, I need an enema.
• 45:44
  Ted Hicks: You're in a situation and you're like, okay, I'm going to look for my significant other or my partner or whatever like that, but that person doesn't need to meet that best friend.
• 46:00
  Carmen Lezeth: Would your best friend not do that for you?
• 46:02
  Carmen Lezeth: I mean, that's a little too much information.
• 46:05
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: That's a crazy example.
• 46:06
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: That is the best friend.
• 46:10
  Andrea Nunez: That's a wild, crazy example, a real-life example real life example.
• 46:15
  Carmen Lezeth: I had surgery and my best friend andrea helped me take a shower.
• 46:20
  Carmen Lezeth: No problem, wasn't even a question, because I could not do it myself, right?
• 46:24
  Carmen Lezeth: I did it for a week, helping me and making sure that I had everything I needed.
• 46:29
  Carmen Lezeth: That's the best.
• 46:30
  Carmen Lezeth: You know what Any one of my best friends would have done that.
• 46:35
  Andrea Nunez: I don't have any friends who I wouldn't if I had to call and be like dude.
• 46:40
  Andrea Nunez: I need an NMI.
• 46:41
  Andrea Nunez: I need your help.
• 46:41
  Andrea Nunez: All of my friends would come and help me if I needed them.
• 46:46
  Andrea Nunez: I would be there for you, okay.
• 46:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I just want you to know now NMA Ted, I just want you to know now Enema.
• 46:57
  Mister B: Ted.
• 46:57
  Ted Hicks: I wanted to go to an extreme.
• 46:59
  Ted Hicks: I wanted to go to a full extreme, to see like, okay, here's the difference, you know it would be.
• 47:09
  Andrea Nunez: I mean knock on wood.
• 47:10
  Andrea Nunez: I didn't have to make that call, but I got people.
• 47:15
  Andrea Nunez: I'm call, but I got people.
• 47:16
  Carmen Lezeth: I'm with Nancy.
• 47:17
  Carmen Lezeth: I got people.
• 47:17
  Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I got people For real.
• 47:19
  Joy Gouge: Yeah.
• 47:20
  Brian McGauhey: I've been like a bloodshed.
• 47:21
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Is it weak?
• 47:22
  Brian McGauhey: Yeah, but enema yeah.
• 47:24
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: But is it because it's another male?
• 47:26
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Is that because I mean you got Andrea and Carmen would do it for each other, no questions asked.
• 47:32
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: But is it because you're ride or die, or your best friend's another male?
• 47:35
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: You mean to tell me you wouldn't do it nah, nah, my friend really needs it.
• 47:42
  Mister B: You're going for it?
• 47:42
  Mister B: Gotta go get it.
• 47:45
  Ted Hicks: Cynthia, you know, I got really quiet right.
• 47:48
  Joy Gouge: I was like hmm, are you guys any ride or dies because don't feel like it.
• 47:52
  Joy Gouge: Tony doesn't know what to say.
• 47:53
  Joy Gouge: Are you guys any Rad or nice?
• 47:53
  Joy Gouge: Don't be like it.
• 47:55
  Mister B: Tony doesn't know what to say I'll get it, I'll get it.
• 47:59
  Mister B: But if you're gonna Tell me, like yo, we gotta go with the Procedure, then I'm like hey, man, you're on your own, but that's what I'm gonna tell you.
• 48:05
  Mister B: Be real with it.
• 48:07
  Mister B: I'm gonna tell you that y'all be on your own, but I'll fight for you, I'll go get it.
• 48:10
  Carmen Lezeth: If you need it.
• 48:11
  Carmen Lezeth: Maybe everyone's definitions are a little bit different as to what spouses and friendships, I think in the perfect world for me and the world that I live in.
• 48:21
  Carmen Lezeth: My best friend and my ride or die are pretty much exactly the same person.
• 48:26
  Carmen Lezeth: The reason why I'm single is because I don't want anything less than that in the man that's going to spend his life with me.
• 48:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Do you know what I mean?
• 48:35
  Carmen Lezeth: Like I have a standard that I and Brian, I think you should think that way too.
• 48:42
  Mister B: I'm glad to hear the comments.
• 48:43
  Mister B: What happened?
• 48:45
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: Brian should think that way too yeah.
• 48:47
  Carmen Lezeth: Brian.
• 48:48
  Brian McGauhey: Yeah.
• 48:48
  Brian McGauhey: But here's the thing my standards are reasonable, carmen's standards.
• 48:52
  Brian McGauhey: Not even the best Olympic pole vaulter can hit that bar.
• 48:56
  Joy Gouge: You need a jet pack.
• 48:58
  Brian McGauhey: For Carmen's standards.
• 48:59
  Brian McGauhey: You need a jet pack.
• 49:00
  Brian McGauhey: If not a jet pack, you need a plane.
• 49:02
  Brian McGauhey: If not a plane, you get a damn shuttle.
• 49:05
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't.
• 49:05
  Carmen Lezeth: What is he doing?
• 49:07
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't understand.
• 49:08
  Carmen Lezeth: Yes, you're absolutely right, the standard is way high.
• 49:12
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't even Wait.
• 49:12
  Mister B: Yes, you're absolutely right, the standard is way high.
• 49:14
  Mister B: I don't even Wait, wait, wait.
• 49:15
  Mister B: I'm reasonable.
• 49:16
  Mister B: Hold on hold, on, pardon, pardon.
• 49:17
  Mister B: What exactly is the standard Where's?
• 49:21
  Ted Hicks: the stage.
• 49:22
  Brian McGauhey: Are you being generous?
• 49:24
  Mister B: Well, you are.
• 49:25
  Mister B: In general, that's her standard, because the way Brian says it is like it's unreachable.
• 49:31
  Mister B: What's happening here?
• 49:32
  Mister B: God bless that woman.
• 49:34
  Mister B: Yeah, yeah, huh.
• 49:34
  Mister B: What happened?
• 49:37
  Rick Costa: God bless that woman, Nancy we have to shout out the comments.
• 49:40
  Andrea Nunez: You guys Remember that.
• 49:43
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: The comments are going crazy.
• 49:47
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't understand what's happening.
• 49:48
  Carmen Lezeth: I just got lost so fast.
• 49:49
  Carmen Lezeth: You know someone who would never fart in front of her husband, god bless that woman.
• 49:54
  Carmen Lezeth: See, this is all the enema stuff.
• 49:56
  Carmen Lezeth: Man See, when you bring toilet stuff into the stream, this is what happens.
• 50:02
  Brian McGauhey: Just take it easy on the fiber y'all.
• 50:05
  Ted Hicks: Yeah me man.
• 50:07
  Brian McGauhey: Talk some parsley Easy on the bread.
• 50:11
  Carmen Lezeth: So, Brian, I'm going to answer the question because he asked me a question.
• 50:14
  Carmen Lezeth: You want to know what the standard is for me, or are you trying to figure out what the standard is for all women and why you're having maybe difficulties finding women?
• 50:23
  Brian McGauhey: who want you for your money.
• 50:25
  Brian McGauhey: All the above, I got time.
• 50:28
  Ted Hicks: Yeah.
• 50:29
  Mister B: Here we go.
• 50:32
  Mister B: Run open Pandora's box, there we go am I missing?
• 50:37
  Carmen Lezeth: is this really hard?
• 50:37
  Brian McGauhey: I didn't knock the door.
• 50:38
  Brian McGauhey: I didn't knock on the door, I kicked that door.
• 50:40
  Brian McGauhey: Let's go, no, I I asked.
• 50:43
  Mister B: I asked what was carmen's standards?
• 50:45
  Mister B: Because of the way brian's over exaggerating, though that's what I know, that's what I because because it's time to go get our beers.
• 50:53
  Carmen Lezeth: Tony and Brian always call me bougie.
• 50:56
  Carmen Lezeth: They say I'm so bougie because.
• 50:58
  Carmen Lezeth: Let me give you the example why.
• 51:00
  Carmen Lezeth: Again Because one time they were thinking about coming to California and I said I'll be happy to suggest some hotels and some places you can stay.
• 51:10
  Carmen Lezeth: I live in Santa Monica, california, on the beach, santa Monica, california, on the beach, santa Monica, nice.
• 51:16
  Carmen Lezeth: So I suggested hotels that Andrea Cynthia has stayed at and Andrea lives here as well.
• 51:22
  Carmen Lezeth: The normal hotel here would easily be one night like what?
• 51:28
  Carmen Lezeth: $500, $550 a night.
• 51:30
  Ted Hicks: And we lost it.
• 51:31
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: And they lost it and they have not let go of the whole bougie concept since then Can I just say, when I went to Santa Monica to visit Carmen, she hated the hotel I was in, oh my God, because it was literally across the street from the pier.
• 51:46
  Mister B: May we ask which hotel it was please?
• 51:48
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: But it was only like.
• 51:49
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: I think $200 a night.
• 51:52
  Ted Hicks: Which hotel, cynthia, was it five star?
• 51:54
  Carmen Lezeth: It was only, like I think, $200 a night.
• 51:56
  Ted Hicks: Cynthia, was it five star?
• 51:57
  Carmen Lezeth: It was four stars, that's the reason why it was also across from the pier.
• 52:01
  Carmen Lezeth: Did you hear that part?
• 52:02
  Carmen Lezeth: And, cynthia, what else was broken?
• 52:04
  Carmen Lezeth: You?
• 52:05
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: didn't have a pool.
• 52:06
  Cynthia Ruiz Lopez: They were renovating the pool, so we didn't have a pool.
• 52:19
  Carmen Lezeth: And I had to go pick you up and go around around the world, even though you're 10 minutes from me.
• 52:20
  Carmen Lezeth: I had to go around the world to go pick you up because it is like the the crowd anyway.
• 52:22
  Carmen Lezeth: If you're gonna ask me where you want to stay in santa monica, or you ask andrea, you ask anyone you want to stay in santa monica at the beach, I'm gonna tell you where you should stay because these are beautiful hotels here.
• 52:31
  Carmen Lezeth: But and again it again it's not even Santa Monica.
• 52:34
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't like.
• 52:35
  Carmen Lezeth: When I go to New York, I stay in Soho, I stay in Tribeca.
• 52:38
  Carmen Lezeth: That is the luxury, my people, of not having children.
• 52:43
  Carmen Lezeth: Okay, that's the other part that you don't need to understand.
• 52:47
  Carmen Lezeth: I don't have to spend my money or worry about taking care of kids or whatever, so I can do things like fly first class or those are choices I make.
• 52:57
  Mister B: Thank you, man.
• 52:58
  Mister B: Thank you, you have the option to pamper yourself.
• 53:01
  Mister B: I'm just saying, and that's not a crime.
• 53:06
  Andrea Nunez: It's not a crime.
• 53:08
  Mister B: If that's how you want to do things, it's not a crime.
• 53:10
  Andrea Nunez: Check out and say that she has lived a life and she has earned, she deserves to get what she wants and to be bougie and all of those things.
• 53:26
  Andrea Nunez: And so, whatever her standards are, like, yeah, someone should meet those standards, and if they don't guess what, she's fine without them.
• 53:34
  Carmen Lezeth: It's okay and I'm not taking money out of your pocket, brian.
• 53:37
  Carmen Lezeth: Until then, remember it's all about the joy.
• 53:45
  Carmen Lezeth: Everyone Bye, good night, bye.
• 53:48
  Carmen Lezeth: Thanks for stopping by.
• 53:50
  Carmen Lezeth: All About the Joy.
• 53:51
  Carmen Lezeth: Be better and stay beautiful folks.
• 53:54
  Carmen Lezeth: Have a sweet day.